Fifty Shades Full Circle
by nuwriter
Summary: No change in characters from the original trilogy. This is a continuation. Ana and Christian have endured a tumultuous year. Yet they remain strong with their love for each other and their family. Will new revelations tear them apart? Will the coming changes divide them or make them stronger. You may want to read Fifty Shades More and Fifty Shade Clarity first. This is book 3 of 3.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: Thank you for finding this is a continuation of the Fifty Shades of Grey Trilogy. This is book III of three. Book I is, Fifty Shades…More and book II is, Fifty Shades…Clarity. You may want to read Book I and II before starting this as there will be references from the first two books in this story.**

**Disclaimer:** This is an interpretation of copyrighted original material. The original characters of Fifty Shades of Grey are owned by E.L. James. The original content, ideas, characters and intellectual property of this story are owned by Nuwriter, as of 2012. Reference to real persons, places, or events are made in a fictional context, and are not intended to be libelous, defamatory, or in any way factual. No copyright infringement is intended.

Rated **M** for adult language and situations.

* * *

**Fifty Shades…Full Circle**

**Chapter 1**

It's been six weeks since the accident and Dr. Greene finally released me yesterday. Boy was Christian glad. We did the best we could to keep the passion going during that time, but I thought Christian was going to devour me last night. I felt the same way about him. I couldn't get enough of him. I think we pretty much fornicated our way through our entire bedroom and bathroom.

I feel invigorated today. I still have my moments of sadness. It never goes away. We had Sam's service. Only family. Teddy wanted to go and he did well. I was very proud of him. It was probably the toughest thing Christian and I have ever been through. He's been keeping busy with work. Looking at planes. In fact we may go to Houston to look at one he is interested in next weekend. Actually I think he may be as interested in the company as he is the plane.

He's due home any time now. I need to get down stairs to the gym. I've got to start working on getting back in shape. This is always the worst part. Trying to lose the weight and get the body back in shape.

I've got my exercise clothes on and headed down.

"Hi, baby. You're home." I stop to give my returning warrior a quick kiss.

He grabs me around the waist as he kisses me and picks me up. I feel as though he will go down my throat. I put my legs around his waist and my arms around his neck. He cups my butt with his hands as he kisses me and walks toward the bed. He leans over the bed and drops me falling on top of me. I giggle as he lifts my sports top and grabs my breast in his mouth.

"Christian! Stop."

"Hu uh." He growls.

"You still have your suite and tie on." I try to wiggle away.

"Mmmm. You smell good. Taste good too," he whispers against my nipple.

"Seriously. The door is open. The kids will come walking through any minute. Release my breast, Mr. Grey." I giggle again.

He pushes up and looks down at me and pulls my top back into proper position. "Okay. But I'm taking a rain check."

"Who says I'm giving one?" I ask.

"I don't fucking care. I taking one anyway," he smirks.

I get up and straighten myself.

"Where are you going?" he asks.

"Down to the gym. I have to be able to ward off all those flatter stomachs and tighter asses you come in contact with every day." I tell him as I turn to leave.

He stops me by putting his finger in the top of my exercise shorts and pulling me back to sit next to him on our bed. "Wait just one minute. What do you mean by that?" he asks so seriously. "Do you honestly think that I would ever look at anybody else?"

"Well, no. I didn't mean anything by it. A woman just wants to keep her man happy. Keep him at home," I give him my best bat of the eyelashes.

"Anastasia, you do keep me happy. Please give me more credit than to think a flat stomach or a tight ass could turn my head." I think I've really hurt him. "Baby, I had all the ass a man could ask for before we got married. I fucked anyone I chose, anywhere I chose, any time I chose and in any manor I chose. If that's all I wanted then I'd still be doing it. I love you and you give me everything I need. I've not as much as looked at another woman since the day you fell into my office and I never intend to. Do you understand me?"

I nod as I stare into his eyes. "Yes, Christian I do. I just want to look good for you and for me. I feel better when I look good. Even you work out." I trace his jaw with my finger and give him a kiss. "Want to work out with me before dinner?"

"Let me get changed."

"Okay. I'll meet you down there."

I walk myself down to the gym that is on the lower level of the house. I take a minute to stare at the equipment. Well. I might as well start. I decide the treadmill, is a good starting point. I turn it on and begin walking.

Christian appears through the door and my heart almost stops. He is in his jogging shorts and shoes, only. He walks over to the other treadmill and turns it on. As he walks he continues increasing the speed until he is at a run. I feel so inadequate. I'm doing well to walk. I do my 20 minutes and then stop and decide to do some machines. I haven't really used them much since I worked out after Grace was born. I can't remember really how to set them. Finally Christian stops and comes over to help.

"What's wrong?" he asks trying to catch his breath.

"I'm trying to remember how to set this machine."

He gives me a sympathetic chuckle. "Here." He makes a few adjustments. "Now get on and see if that works." I lie down on the bench and try to push the bar up.

"Too heavy?" he asks.

"A little." I tell him. "He adjusts the machine some more and it's easier to use.

"There. That's better. Thanks." I tell him.

He stands next to me and watches as I struggle to lift the weights. He actually helps a little. After doing several reps I decide I'm finished. Christian quickly resets the machine to an ungodly amount of weight and begins to lift as if he were lifting a box of tissues. I watch him as every muscle in his body flexes and relaxes.

"Show off." I smirk at him. After finishing he helps me jump up on the vertical knee raise. I begin to lift my legs. Takes him about two lifts before he is between them, circling my legs around his waist and cupping my but in his hands. "Let go," he whispers.

"Christian I'm really trying to work out," I plead.

"I said let go," he reiterates.

I release my hold on the machine and put my arms around his neck as Christian supports me. "Let's get in the hot tub."

"Christian I haven't finished." I try to tell him.

"Sshh. Just come with me. I'll give you a better work out than these fucking machines will."

Well I can't really argue with that. Can I? Christian walks us over to the spa room with me in tow and slams the door closed with his foot. He walks up the steps then down into the tub, clothes and all. We sink down into the warm water still clutching each other. He seals his lips over mine and he is devouring my mouth. He sits back in the bubbly water and pulls my foot up taking off my shoe and athletic sock, nipping at my toes, then repeats the process with the other foot. Fuck he is so damn hot!

He slides on top of me again and pushes his hands under my top pulling it over my head and off. Gliding his tongue over my neck and down my chest he stops to softly kiss my breasts. I can feel his hand as he slides it between my legs rubbing me through my gym shorts. I circle his neck and pull his mouth closer to mine as I arch my back to meet his hand.

"Oh, fuck, Christian." I gasp.

"What is it baby? Do you want me to take your shorts off?"

I nod. "Yes."

"Say it. Tell me what you want Anastasia." He whispers against my lips.

"Take my shorts off." I moan.

"What?"

"Please. Please take them off." I ask.

"I'll do whatever you ask me to, baby," he whispers.

Christian puts his fingers inside the waistband of my shorts and pulls them down my legs and off my feet leaving me totally naked underneath him in the warm swirling water.

"Now what?" he whispers as he slides his finger between my thighs and finds me. He begins to circle with a slow steady rhythm leaving me to whimper under his touch. "Is that good? Is that what you want?" he asks.

"Yes. Yes." I roll my hips to meet his fingers as his fingers pass my threshold. He is kissing my neck and whispering in my ear. "Baby, you're so ready." He stills his fingers and I whimper and try to roll my hips to force them inside. "Put your hand on mine," he whispers. I place my hand between my legs on top of his. "Now show me what you want." I move his hand to repeat the motion. "That's a good girl. Show me what you need so I can give it to you, baby." He begins to massage me with the pad of his thumb as he slides his fingers.

"Oh, god, Christian." I try to catch my breath.

"I think you like that," he teases me.

He kisses me deep and wet. "Do you want me to make you come?" he asks. "Answer me or I'll stop."

"Yes. Yes. Please." I can only cry.

"Please what?" he demands.

"Please don't stop." I beg him. That's what he wants. He wants me to beg.

"That's all you had to do , baby." He whispers against my neck. "One climax coming up."

He continues to circle and stroke until I think I will come out of the tub. My breath is hitching as he rubs faster and faster making me quiver with each perfectly timed stroke. I can feel the tightness in my abdomen as he forces me to the edge of my tolerance.

"That's my girl. You're right there baby. Just relax." I finally feel that sensation in my core that lets me know I'm past controlling anything. I can feel the waves of my climax consume me and take over. "Look at me, baby. Look at me," he commands me. I look into his eyes just in time to give myself to him. I convulse under his touch and melt in his arms. "That's my baby. That's my good girl." He whispers as I finally begin to catch my breath and relax. Christian slides his shorts down and moves on top of me. I can feel his firmness as it probes my opening, then with one smooth move he is inside.

I can only gasp as I accept him, "Oh, god," is all I can get out. He pulls my legs to wrap around his waist as he begins to withdraw slowly and then quickly fill me again. My hands can feel each and every muscle in his butt as they flex and relax with each rhythmic push. I can hear his breathing as it becomes more erratic and he begins to drive harder. Bracing with his arms; his hands on the side of the tub on either side of my head I feel as though he will crawl inside of me as he closes his eyes and clenches teeth. He is breathing through his clenched teeth as he races toward his climax. He bows his head and pushes once more deep and hard. "Fucking, God." He growls.

"Look at me," I whisper. "I want to see you." Christian looks into my eyes and I can see his surrender as he stills and begins to tremble. He finally finds his breath and relaxes in my arms. "Oh my God, Baby." He showers my neck with kisses, finally finding my mouth. "I love you so much Anastasia." He murmurs against my mouth. "There could never be anyone else for me. Never."

We've gotten dinner finished and kids to bed. We're just out of the shower. Christian has collected on his rain check and I'm in my robe towel drying my hair. Christian is already in bed with his laptop working away. Reaching into my dresser I grab a nightshirt and drop my robe to slip it on over my head. I put the robe and towel away and grab my lotion and head for our bed. I scoot up on the bed next to him and begin to rub the lotion on my legs. Christian closes the laptop and puts it on his nightstand. "Here. Give me that," he says as he grabs the lotion bottle. He moves over in front of me and begins to massage the lotion into my legs.

"That feels nice." I smile up at him as he massages my calves.

"Where now?" he asks.

"Well I pretty much need it all over; arms, tummy backside," I tell him.

"Turn over," he orders me. I turn on my tummy and he puts the lotion in his hands and massages it into my back paying special attention to my butt. Then he instructs me to turn over and straddling my legs begins to spread the lotion over my tummy and breasts, then my arms. After he has finished he bends down and kisses me then heads for my breasts.

"Christian, don't," I tell him.

"Don't what?" he asks as he gently kisses my breasts.

"Baby, haven't we done enough?" I ask.

"There's no such thing as enough with you," he whispers.

"Christian, I'm sore and I'm tired," I whine.

"Sore?" he asks with surprise.

"Yes, sore. We hadn't had sex in four weeks because of your ribs. We did it one night and then I was out of commission for six weeks. Besides I'm still tender from that hysterectomy. Give me a little breather."

"Why didn't you say something?" he almost looks like I've slapped him.

"Because I love sex with you and I missed it. It's not like I never want it again. I just need to take it a little slower, baby."

Christian moves back over to his side of the bed and lies down facing me, looking defeated.

"Oh, Christian Grey, don't pout at me. We did it all over this room last night and then twice today already. Can we snuggle?" I look up at him through my lashes and give him a little smile.

"Come here woman," he pulls me over to him and gives me a good kiss. "You need to tell me these things. If it's too soon, baby, then let me know. I don't want to rush you."

"You aren't rushing me. I just need to ease back into things a little." I snuggle up to him and he holds me tighter. "I thought I might take down the nursery tomorrow and go through my maternity clothes."

"Why don't you wait and I'll help you with the nursery this weekend," he kisses my forehead.

"Are you sure you want to?" I ask him.

"Not any more than you do. We can do it together," he says. "I'll let you go through your clothes by yourself. I can't help much with that."

"Okay. What happened to my dress and necklace? I haven't seen either one," I ask.

"The necklace and earrings are back in the safe. The dress was discarded. There was no way to clean it. I didn't want you to have to look at it anymore."

"Oh. Okay. It's just as well. Do you have a lot going on tomorrow?" I ask him.

"The usual. Meetings most of the day. I need to talk to Stephen about that plane I'm interested in. I want to take a look at it before someone else jumps on it. What do you have going on?"

"Nothing. Just going through the clothes I guess."

"Tell you what Mrs. Grey. Why don't you come into town and meet me at the office and let me take you to lunch."

"Really? You'd have time?" I ask.

He looks at me with a look of surprise on his face. "Well, of course I have time. Even if I don't I'll make time."

"Are you sure?"

"Fuck, yeah."

"I'd like that. I haven't really been out of the house in weeks except to see the doctor."

"Good. Come up about noon. Any place particular you want to go?"

"It doesn't matter. Any place is fine."

"Okay. I'll put some thought into it."

He is stroking my hair. "Sweet heart, please tell me if I ever push you in to anything you don't want or aren't ready for. You have to tell me Anastasia. I need to know how you're feeling."

"I will. I'm sorry. I should have said something. I was just as glad to be back in service as you were."

"Baby, I can never get my fill of you. I could fuck you all day every day. I could spend the rest of my life buried inside you, but not if it is uncomfortable for you. I don't ever want to hurt you."

"You didn't hurt me. I think we were both just a little over enthusiastic. I feel sure I'll be better tomorrow." I give him a big hug. "I'm excited about lunch tomorrow," I tell him.

"I think I need to get you out more, if you're getting excited over a lunch." He looks down at me and smiles.

"I have an idea." I whisper.

"What?" he whispers back.

"Turn out the light and let's make out," I whisper again.

"What?"

"Yeah. If you're lucky, I'll let you feel me up," I promise.

Christian reaches over and turns out the light and we snuggle and make out until we fall asleep.

Teddy bear is off to school and I'm still at the table with Grace and Gail. Grace is finishing her cheerios and making her usual mess, but she is enjoying them.

"Grace, baby, I love you but you sure are a messy little girl." She gives me a huge grin and continues getting half her cheerios in her mouth.

"Gail are you sure you wanted to take on the children?" I look over at her sipping her coffee waiting for Grace to finish.

"Oh, yes. I adore them. I'd much rather be with them than making beds and running the vacuum." She smiles over at Grace.

"Gay. Cherwio," Grace sticks out her hand covered in milk to hand Gail a soggy Cherrio.

"No thank you, angel." Gail tells her.

"Smart move, Mrs. Taylor. I wouldn't eat it either. How is Myra working out? Can you tell yet?"

"She seems to be doing fine. She's getting used to the routine and learning where everything is and how it works." Gail tells me.

"You'd let me know if there are any problems wouldn't you?" I ask.

"Yes, Ana. I would. But I think it will all work out well."

"Okay. I'm going into town to have lunch with Mr. Grey today. Anything I can do for you while I'm there?" I ask her.

"Oh, how nice. You need to get out. You and Mr. Grey haven't been out since the …..party." She looks down into her coffee cup.

"It's okay, Gail. It won't go away just by not talking about it."

"I know. I just hated to bring it up. I didn't want to remind you."

"It's okay. I need to go through my maternity clothes today and get rid of them. Christian and I are going to try to go through the nursery this weekend. Do you know of anyone who could use the furniture and the …. the baby clothes?" It's really hard to hold the tears back. I don't want to give his baby clothes away. But that's silly. I have no use for them and I'm sure someone else does.

"Well, my niece is expecting. She's having a girl, but she might be able to use some of the things. Ana? Are you sure you're ready to do that?" she asks.

"No. I'm not sure. But it has to be done. If I wait until I'm sure, then they'll always be there. I guess I can have Liz come and redecorate it as a guest room again. Maybe I'll just leave it empty for a while. Maybe I could turn it into an office. I intend to try to go back to work and I'll need an office at home. That's a thought."

"Well. I guess I'll head upstairs and get started on my closet, or maybe I'll wait until I get back from lunch. I think I'll get a bath and get really spiffed up for my husband. I'm looking forward to this lunch." I give her a big smile.

I get a nice warm shower and wash my hair, then take my time finding something cute to wear. It's a really nice almost spring day and I'm so looking forward to getting out. I get my hair smoothed out and up in a ponytail. Gosh, it's gotten so long. I really need a haircut. Got all my make up on and slip into some really cute leggings and an oversized top that drops off one shoulder and some dynamite heels; black leather stilettos with leather ties that wrap around my ankles and tie. I add some huge hoop earrings and a long chain necklace. I look pretty good. I feel pretty good. One quick look at the behind in these leggings. Always check the back side before you go out. I don't usually dress like this, but I sort of like it. Not as conservative as usual. Okay. Mr. Grey, here I come.

I stop by Grace's room to tell Gail I'm leaving. She's giving Grace a bath after her cheerios. "Gail, I'm gone. I'll be back after lunch sometime."

She looks up at me, "My goodness you look nice. That's a new look for you. "

"You sure it's okay? I usually dress a little more conservatively, but I sort of like it. Mia helped me pick it out ages ago. "

"Oh no, it looks good on you."

"I hope Christian doesn't think it's too much."

"Ana, he'll love it. Now go before you're late."

"Okay. Later."

Once in the garage I decide to take the R8. I haven't driven it in ages. It feels good to be back in my car. I put on my sunglasses and crank up the radio and take off toward town. The grass is just beginning to turn green and the trees have small green buds on them. Everything looks so fresh and new and clean. Sam crosses my mind, but I really try to concentrate on the radio and try not to let tears spill out of my eyes.

Finally I see Grey House. Who knew this would be mine. I never ever imagined that I would be in this position when I graduated from school. I married a man that I adore and who adores me and it came with all this attached. Pulling in the garage entrance the valet greets me and takes may car. I give Taylor a wave as I walk across the lobby toward the elevator. The elevator has a group of young women standing and waiting so I just move in behind them. Their conversation pricks my ears.

"So have you ever heard anything about Mr. Grey and anyone else?" the tall redhead asks.

"No. I told you. You need to drop this," her blonde friend tells her.

"But surely he's not immune to other women. After all he is a man," the red head says.

Shit what in the world are they discussing?

"Cynthia. I'm telling you. Don't even think about it. Not if you like your job," the blonde tells her.

"Oh why not? The man is friggin' gorgeous. All powerful men have women on the side. I could be that woman," adds Ms. red hair.

"Girl, you are headed for trouble. You need to get that off your mind. I hear the man is crazy about his wife," blonde warns.

"I really wouldn't mind hittin' that a little. I'll bet he's really good in the sack." They both giggle.

"Look," the elevator doors open and we all walk in. I make my way to the back and hug the wall. "Look, I've worked here almost five years and I've never heard even a hint of him fooling around. If any of these girls here had ever hit that, believe me it would have been all over the building."

"Well, maybe he just hasn't met the right one. I can be pretty convincing."

Okay, do I pull her hair out now or wait until the elevator stops?

"I'm telling you, don't even think of going there," says Ms. blonde.

The elevator stops and the doors slide open. There stands my husband, jacket unbuttoned and hands in his pockets. He's staring straight ahead at the floor. I can tell he's got something on his mind. He doesn't even notice that anyone else is in the in the elevator. He gets on and turns to face the door, not speaking to anyone. Make one move and I'll gouge your eyes out, bitch.

"Um, Mr. Grey." Ms. redhead extends her hand. "I'm Cynthia Bellows. Marketing."

Christian just looks over at her. "What?"

"Cynthia Bellows. I'm in marketing."

"Yes?" Christian responds, never acknowledging her hand.

"I just wanted to introduce myself. I wanted to let you know that I'm available for any special projects that you might be working on. I'd love to be involved. I'm available anytime and willing to work late hours or whatever it takes to get the job accomplished."

"Ms…Bellows is it? First of all I don't do any special projects. But, if I should, it would involve senior management, only. Second I never, repeat never work after hours with female employees."

The elevator stops and the doors open and Christian gets off without looking back.

"Excuse me. This is my floor." I make my way to the front of the group of girls. "Excuse me , Mr. Grey." I call.

Christian stops and turns around and smiles as he holds out his arm and takes my hand as I exit the elevator car. "Hello, Mrs. Grey. I've been waiting for you to get here."

Christian surprises me by pulling me up in his arms and giving me the longest, wettest kiss. Strange, because he's not one for public displays of affection.

The elevator door slides closed as I hear the blonde. "I told you not to go there."

Christian puts his arm around me as we walk toward his office. "What was that for?"

He smirks. "Well, I knew you needed to plant your flag. I just thought I'd help you plant it a little deeper."

We go into his office and he pulls me in his arms and smiles at me.

"What?" I ask.

"Nothing. I just like it that you're jealous."

"I wasn't jealous. I'm fine." I tell him.

"Yeah. I can see you're fine," he snorts.

" Oh, I can think of a special project for Ms. Bellows," I tell him.

"Really what?" he asks.

"She can work on not letting the door hit her in the ass as she leaves," I suggest.

Christian laughs. "Don't worry. Her desk will be cleaned out by close of business today."

"Christian, I was just kidding. You can't fire her, much as I'd like you to," I tell him.

"Fuck I can't. I don't put up with that fucking shit. I have no desire to be involved in a sexual harassment suite."

He walks over and picks up his phone. "No one in this company better ever be caught involved with someone they fucking supervise."

"You don't allow coworkers to date?" I ask.

"I don't care if they butt fuck each other across their desks as long as none of it involves employees and management."

I laugh out loud and catch myself putting my hand to my mouth. "Sorry."

"What?" he asks.

"I just got that image in my mind of everyone butt fucking on their desks."

He smirks and he talks to the head of marketing, "Smithson. Grey… I want a Ms. Bellows, gone by the end of the day…. You heard me….. I don't like her work….that works out then….take care of it."

"What works out?" I ask.

"She was still on her three month probation for new hires. Terminate at will."

I'm sitting on the edge of his desk and he walks over and puts his arms around my waist and looks down at me, "You look awfully fetching today. I've never seen that outfit." He nuzzles my neck. "How 'bout I just butt fuck you across my desk, Mrs. Grey?" he breaths against my neck.

"I think that's one of those home activities, Mr. Grey. Besides, I'm hungry," I tell him.

"Mmmm. Me too. For you," he growls.

I can't keep from giggling. His mouth finally finds mine and I feel my heart quicken as he kisses me. I put my arms around his neck and kiss back until I feel him pushing me down on the desk.

"Oh, no you don't. I need lunch. You promised me."

He slides his hand down my leg and grabs my foot. "I like these shoes."

"I guess so. They must be six inches high," I tell him.

"I think you need to wear them sometime when we fuck," he finds my neck again.

"Mr. Grey? I never imagined you having a foot fetish." I giggle.

"The only fetish I have is an Ana fetish," he breaths against my skin. "We'd better get lunch or I'm going to clear this desk and take you on it from one end to the other. All that 'making out', as you call it, we did last night has done nothing but make me horny as fuck."

"Oh, my poor baby." I give him a pout.

"I just hope you're ready for me when I get home. Let's go." He picks up the phone. "What did you drive in today?"

"The R8."

"Have Mrs. Grey's R8 brought around."

"Okay, Madame. Let's hit the road."


	2. Chapter 2

**Fifty Shades…Full Circle**

**Chapter 2**

"So, pretty lady. What are you doing next weekend?" Christian reaches over and takes my hand.

"Well, I suppose I'll be engaged with my husband. He's very handsome, you know," I smile at him.

"Hmmmm. Is that so?" Christian smirks.

"Yes, he's extremely powerful and incredibly good in bed, too." I smile over at him.

"Well, you must be very happy," Christian grins.

"Oh, yes I am. He's made me a very happy woman," I lean over and give him a kiss on his cheek.

"Sounds like a keeper."

"Yes. I really think I'll keep him around," I giggle. "Besides my children are rather fond of him."

Christian laughs as he maneuvers the car through traffic. "Seriously, baby. I would like to go to Houston to check out that plane. Do you want to go? Gail can keep the kids and we can make a weekend out of it. Would you like that?"

I smile and nod my enthusiasm. "Yes. Mr. Grey I accept."

"Good. I thought we'd leave Friday afternoon and fly back on Sunday."

"What are we going to fly in? We don't have a plane," I ask him.

"They are sending the one I'm interested in to pick us up. Then fly us back. Stephen is going and he'll pilot. I want his opinion on it."

"Oh, I'm going out of town with two men. Lucky me."

"But you can only sleep with one of them," he reminds me.

"Oh? Which one?" I ask.

"That just might earn you a spanking Mrs. Grey," he warns.

"Yeah, yeah. I've heard it all before. Big man with a twitchy palm," I taunt him.

"Keep it up." He gives me a sideways glance.

"Where are we going?" I ask.

"I thought we'd go to Ivar's. I'm hungry for seafood. Okay with you?"

"That sounds good. Which one?"

"Salmon House okay?"

"Yes." I nod.

We finish our leisurely lunch. I had the clam chowder and the Salmon Sampler and Christian had the Organic Greens and Huckleberry Salad and the Sautéed Northwest Oysters. We shared and it was delicious. The wine topped it off.

Christian helps me slide into my car, and we head back to his office.

"That was really good. I'm stuffed," I tell him.

"It was good," He says. " You don't look stuffed."

"Well I am. I told you my husband makes me a happy woman."

"I suppose you'll need to work all that food off later," he tells me.

"I'll go down to the gym this afternoon."

"That's not the type of work out I was referring to ."

"I know," I smirk at him.

We arrive back at Grey House and I deposit my husband at the entrance. I walk around to the driver's side and get behind the wheel, but not before giving him a big thank you kiss.

"Drive careful, baby." He tells me as he closes my door and leans in for a kiss.

"I will. See you this evening." I wave back as I pull out into traffic. I look in the rearview mirror and see Christian motioning me to slow down. Good heavens, he never lets up.

* * *

I finally make it home and Gail has just gotten Grace down for a nap and Teddy isn't due home from school yet.

After stopping to say hello to Gail I head upstairs and change out of my fancy clothes and back into my jeans. I really hate to go through these clothes, but I need to get it over with. I thumb through and pull out the maternity things. They're so pretty I hate to get rid of them. I don't know why I hated them so much when I had to wear them. It makes me sad to think about getting rid of them. Pulling each item out I search through all the pockets to make sure I haven't left anything in them before I hang them in the 'give away' section. I pull out tops and now down to the jeans. I will miss this elastic. I'll give it credit, it was comfortable. I shove my hand down in the pocket and pullout a piece of paper I had left down in the pocket. Straightening it out, I look to see what it is. Oh, my goodness.

* * *

_Mrs. Grey,_

_My name is Virginia Douglas. I am deeply sorry if this comes as a surprise to you, but I am Christian's grandmother. It is not my intention to interfere in Christian's life, however, I would so love the opportunity to make contact with my grandson._

_I have been unable to see or speak with him and thought that I might reach out to you. I would much appreciate speaking with you and wonder if we could meet; possibly over lunch one day soon. I am currently in Seattle and will be until next Saturday. I may be contacted at (708) 555- 7698. I look forward to hearing from you,_

_Sincerely,_

_Virginia Douglas_

* * *

I had almost forgotten about this. So much has happened since then. I meant to talk to Grace a little more about this. We spoke briefly and she didn't know anything about his biological family. I'm still on the fence about what to do. I don't know if Christian is even ready to address something like this. We've been through so much lately; do I even want to stir things up?

I'll hold on to it a bit. I open my lingerie drawer and bury the paper deep under the silky fabric. It can stay there while I contemplate what to do.

I pretty much have all my things weeded out. I guess I can see if Gail's niece can use any and the rest can go to Goodwill. I should go down and try to do the treadmill again. If I wait until master gets home, I'll never get anything accomplished. I think I'll lie down just a few minutes until Teddy gets home. I stretch out across the bed and close my eyes. It seems like it's only been seconds until I hear my rambunctious son running down the hall.

He runs in the room but I hear him stop when he thinks I'm asleep. My back is toward him and he tiptoes over and tries to see if I'm asleep.

"Mom." He whispers loudly.

"What?" I whisper back.

"Are you asleep?" he whispers again.

"Yes." I answer.

"Okay." He pauses. "Mom?"

"What?" I ask.

"Are you asleep real hard or just sort of?" he whispers again.

Without warning I turn over and grab him pulling him up on the bed and snuggle him to me. "I'm not too asleep to keep me from hugging you." I kiss his little neck.

"You're not asleep," he squeals.

"I know I faked you out." I pretend to bite his ear. "How was school?"

"It was okay. Johnny Bitterman got in trouble. He was talking in class and Ms. Smithson told him three times to be quiet and he didn't so she sent him down to Mr. Jamison's office and he was there a real long time," he tells me.

"Oh, well you weren't talking were you?" I ask him.

"No ma'am. I don't want to go to Mr. Jamison's office," he tells me.

"Well that's good. I'm glad you're listening to Ms. Smithson."

"She's been a pretty good teacher this year hasn't she?" I ask him.

"Yep. I like her."

"You're going to be a big third grader next year aren't you?"

"Yes ma'am. I'm not sure I want to go to third grade," he tells me.

"Why not baby?" I ask him.

"Well I saw the third grade math book and it looks so hard. I don't think I can do it."

"Well, you don't know it yet. When you get to third grade then you will learn how to do the math problems. Just like when you got to second grade you had to learn how to do it." I run my hand through his hair. "Besides your dad is really good at math. I'm sure he can help you with it."

"Are you good at math, Mom? Can you help me?" he asks.

"Well, sweetheart, I'm better at English. Your Dad is the math wiz in the family."

"Why is he good at math?"

"He just is. Your dad is a very, very smart man. He can do a lot of things really well."

"Mom? Are we rich?" he asks.

"Why do you ask that?"

"Well, Sandy Cheatham said her parents said we were stinkin' rich." He looks up at me.

"Stinkin' rich? Well. Son your daddy does very well. He has worked very hard all his life and he makes a very good living so he can take care of us," I tell him.

"But are we stinkin' rich?" he asks.

"Well, baby," what do I say? "Yes, Teddy. I guess we are stinkin' rich." I confess. "But that's not something you go around telling anyone. Do you understand?"

"Yes ma'am."

"That's not something you are to talk about to anyone. It's a family thing."

"Yes ma'am. We're stinkin' rich, but I'm not supposed to tell anyone about it."

"That's right." At least little Sandy Cheatham's father had the good sense to say 'stinking' in front of his kids. Christian would have just said 'fucking' and not given a shit who heard him. I just don't know what I'm going to do with him. I can't get him to watch his mouth. I really hate that the kids hear that language. I know he doesn't mean anything by it; he just doesn't exercise any self- control over certain aspects of his life. For someone who professes to have learned so much self- control, he sure doesn't use it unless he wants to.

"Do you have any homework, sweetheart?" I ask him.

"Not much. I just have to learn my spelling for the test tomorrow," he pouts.

"Well, I can help you go over your spelling after dinner. Do you want to go outside and play around in the back yard before dinner? I'll go with you," I ask.

"Mom. It's raining. We can't go play in the rain."

"Oh, I didn't know it had started to rain. Why can't we go play in the rain?" I ask.

"'Cause, we'll get all wet," he looks at me like I'm crazy.

"Will you melt if you get wet?" I ask.

"Melt?" he looks perplexed.

"Yes. Like the wicked witch of the west. You know how she melted when Dorothy threw water on her? Will you melt?"

He grins up at me, "No. I can't melt."

"You wanna' go?" I give him a wicked grin.

He gives me a big grin and a nod.

"Come on buddy. Let's go." I grab his little hand and we get off the bed and run downstairs.

"Where are you two going? It's raining outside," Gail looks at us horrified as I slide open the door to the patio.

"We won't melt, Gail," Teddy squeals at her.

"No, Gail. We won't melt," I tell her as we head out the door.

Teddy takes off across the yard and with his arms out like a plane buzzing around the yard.

"I'm gonna' come get you, Theodore," I scream at him as I run into the yard after my son. "You'd better run, 'cause I'm gonna' kiss and tickle you when I catch you."

The rain feels cool but not cold and I love seeing the pure delight on Teddy's face. After all it is just water. I run and chase him zigzagging through the yard. Teddy squealing and me squealing back. I finally catch him and grab him under his arms swinging him around I hug him tight and kiss his soft little neck causing him to squeal even louder.

"What the fuck is going on?" I hear my lord and master yell from the covered patio.

"Ho oh. I think Dad is home," I whisper on his neck.

"Are we in trouble, Mom?" he asks.

"Nope." I tell him.

"We're playing in the rain. What's going on with you?" I yell back.

"Yeah, dad. We're playin' in the rain." Teddy yells at his dad.

Christian takes off his suit jacket and heads out to join us. I have Teddy around the chest and Christian grabs him from me and gives him a big hug and kiss. He sets him down again and then looks at me. "You'd better run, Mrs. Grey. I think I owe you a spanking."

"Me? A spanking? Why whatever for?" I tease.

"A remark about sleeping with our pilot as I remember," he grins.

"Oh. Seems I do remember that. Guess I'd better run then." I take off after Teddy with Christian in hot pursuit.

After Christian finally catches me, he puts his arm around my shoulder as we watch Teddy. "Whose bright idea was this?" he asks me.

I look up at him, "Mine."

"I do love it when you're wet, Mrs. Grey," he smirks.

I smack his chest, "You never quite, do you?"

"Nope. Does it bother you?" he asks.

"No. It's one of the little things I love about you." I put my arms around his waist and lean into him as we stand in the rain.

"Hmm. Well, I've got some bigger things you might like even better," he gives me a wicked grin.

"Later, Mr. Grey." I admonish him. "And by the way, watch your mouth in front of the children. I don't know what I'm going to do with you. Do I have to start a swear jar for you?"

"What's a swear jar?" he asks.

"Every time you curse you have to put a dollar in the jar," I tell him.

"Well, I might as well just start with a couple thousand dollars in seed money."

"Christian! I guess money really isn't much of an incentive for you, " I tell him. "Maybe I need to withhold my favors, every time you swear at inappropriate times. "

"You wouldn't last," he smirks at me.

"Probably not." I chuckle.

* * *

"I'm excited about our trip next weekend." I tell him as I get undressed for my shower.

"Good. Me too. We haven't had 24 hours alone is ages," he tells me as he slips out of his slacks and shoes.

"What's this plane like that you are interested it?" I ask.

"What do you know about planes?" he frowns at me.

"Nothing. I just ride in them," I shrug.

"That's what I thought. So telling you about it won't do much good, other than maybe the color of the interior," he smirks.

"Christian. I'm not stupid. I can understand what you tell me." I put my hand on my hips and glare at him.

Christian walks over with a grin on his face and puts his arms around my naked waist. He pulls me in tight and I feel him grow against me.

"Well. It's a very large plane; unusually large in fact. With a really powerful engine that produces a lot of thrust," he begins to kiss my neck. "Its big engine," Kiss. "revs," kiss. "and pulls," kiss. "and strains," kiss. "building power until the pilot releases it," kiss. "Then it hurls down the runway," kiss. "faster," kiss. "and faster," kiss. "until it achieves lift off." He whispers against my neck.

"Hmmm. What happens after liftoff?" I ask with a smile.

"He makes his wife a very happy woman," he whispers against my lips just before sealing his mouth over mine.

"Well, pull your wheels up and put your tray in an upright position, Mr. Grey. You're about to become airborne," I whisper in his ear as I circle his neck with my arms.

Christian cups my butt, "Jump up and hold on," he whispers as he carries me to our bed and lets me fall to the mattress. He follows me and crawls on top of me grasping my hands and pulling them over my head. He trails kisses down my neck and nuzzles my breasts with his nose. "God, you smell so good," he whispers.

I'm writhing underneath him as he is peaking my arousal.

"You think I'm going to fuck you don't you, baby?" he asks.

"I was leaning that way. Aren't you?" I ask.

"I think I promised you a spanking from earlier today," he says against my lips.

"Mmmm. A spanking? Sorry. Don't remember that," I whisper back as I softly peck at his lips.

"Well, I do. Come here." Christian quickly gets up and within a second he is sitting on the edge of the bed and has me across his knee. He puts one leg over mine and holds my hands behind my back with his hand. I can feel his other hand caress my behind. It feels warm and smooth and comforting.

"Why are you getting a spanking Ana?" Christian asks me.

"I'm not sure," I tell him.

"It's because of your smart mouth, isn't it?" he asks me.

"I guess so," I answer.

"I guess so …what?" he asks.

"I guess so …._sir_." Okay I'll play along.

"Are you ready?" he asks.

"No. Not really," I tell him.

"What was that? Are you being a smart ass again?" he asks.

"No. Just smart." I grin over at him.

Then I feel the sting against my butt as his hand makes contact with my skin.

"Owww. That hurt," I tell him.

"It's supposed to hurt. Smart mouthed little girls need to be brought under control. They need to show some respect," he admonishes me. "How many do you need?"

"I don't need any. I won't do it anymore," I tell him.

"Too late for that. I think six should bring you back in line," he tells me.

"Count for me. If you don't keep track, I'll start over. Do you understand?" he asks.

"Yes sir," I sigh.

"That was one," he says.

I feel the sting again on the other cheek.

"Oww. Christian that hurts," I tell him.

"I'm sure it does. Count."

"Two."

I feel his soft sweet caress just before I feel the third hard smack. Shit he hasn't hit me this hard in ages. What's more I can feel his erection growing underneath me.

"You're growing sir," I tell him.

"I didn't tell you to speak. Just count."

"Shit Christian. Three," I get out.

"Your ass is getting beautifully pink, sweetheart," he tells me.

"I'm glad you like it," I gasp.

"There goes that mouth again," he admonishes me.

I feel his caress stop and I brace for the next strike. Then the sting as I receive his fourth hit.

"Four, damn it," I holler.

"Damn it what?" he asks.

"Damn it , sir. Fuck!"

"Not yet. You have two more coming." I can almost feel Christian smiling. I know he's enjoying this. I'm not so sure I am.

I feel his finger slip between my thighs and slide between my folds. He slides it back and forth increasing my arousal then suddenly stops.

"I think you're enjoying this more than you let on, Mrs. Grey," he tells me. "You are incredibly wet."

I feel number five make contact. "Five." I whimper.

"Just one more, baby," he tells me. "One more then I'll fuck you."

I finally feel and hear number six and thank heavens it's over. "Six. Shit that hurt." I try to reach back to rub my sore behind, but Christian holds my hands firm and won't release them.

I feel his fingers descend into me again and stroke until I'm almost at the edge. Then he stops.

"Noooo. Don't." I whimper.

"Don't what?" he asks in that condescending tone.

"Don't stop. Please sir." Okay. I'll play the game. I'll beg.

Christian begins to stroke again and brings me just to the edge once more. This time he slides into me and begins to move in and out. "Oh shit, Christian," is all I can say.

He continues to glide in and out until I can feel myself on the brink. "You're getting ready, baby. But not yet. Not yet." He stops again.

"Christian what are you doing?" I snap in frustration.

"You've been bad. I'll tell you when," he almost chuckles.

"Well do it or let me go," I whimper to him.

"Well, well. You really aren't in a position to be so demanding. Are you now?" he asks.

"Baby, don't tease me, please." I beg.

"That's better." He slowly begins to caress me making me quiver with each contact.

I am writhing beneath him and gasping for breath. I sense the tingling sensation building in me letting me know that I'm about to reach my goal. I can feel my body begging for the release his practiced fingers are promising. Christian continues his slow rhythmic caresses and my belly quivers with each sensual contact. Then, finally, the soft masterful stroke that pushes me and I feel myself fall over the edge. That moment of utter relaxation allowing my body to accept the imminent burden of my climax.

"There you go, baby." I hear him whisper.

"Oh, God, Christian," I gasp as I tense and tremble against his lap. He continues to caress and I feel the spasms continue to pulse through me with each sweet hit.

"That's my girl. I told you I'd take care of you. I'll always take care of you, baby." I can feel myself relax and I try to catch my breath as my release begins to wane. But Christian continues to rub my now engorged, sensitive membranes.

"Christian stop. Please. Stop." I beg again.

I feel him release my hands and in one swift move he has me on the bed on my back. He parts my legs and pushes them up bracing his shoulders against them. I can feel him as he enters me and begins the sweet carnal assault that I have been promised.

"God you feel so fucking good," he growls. He moves slowly and skillfully prolonging the pleasure. "Shit, Ana. You always fit just right, baby." He has me at an angle ensuring that every time he enters I can feel him stroke against the sensitive, aching spot inside and it pushes me closer to the edge again. The skin on my butt is so sensitive from the assault it has just endured that it is almost on fire and it stings with every touch.

Christian is driving with fierce determination and he is breathing a like a racehorse in the Kentucky Derby. "Fuck I'm so hard I'm about to explode," he gasps. "I've been thinking about fucking you all day." I can feel his heart racing inside his chest and see the pure lust that is written on his face. It's as if his brain has switched off and he can focus on nothing but the primal urge to fuck. At this point I am his only salvation, his only want, his only desire. His overwhelming need for me empowers me. I know he is mine.

His every move is pushing me farther and farther and I know I am on the edge of the pure pleasure my body is aching for. "Come on baby," he hisses. "Fucking come for me. I want to watch you ."

I can feel the tightness beginning in my core with his every stroke. "God, Christian," I growl. "Yes. Please." I can feel my hands fist the sheet and my knuckles ache as I clutch them with a vise like grip.

"That's right. Give it up for me, baby," he commands me. My body obeys him and I can feel the explosion of my climax beginning. It spreads through me, making me its prisoner with no hope of releasing me until I am totally spent. My body it giving itself over to him. I belong to him. He possesses me totally.

He continues until he is at his breaking point. I can feel him as he loses control. His eyes lose focus and his lids become heavy as his body is ravaged by the release that is taking away his control. He stills and begins to tremble as his climax rips through him. "Fuck! Fuck! Fuck!" I feel him quiver as he rides out his release. "Jesus, God, Ana I love you!" He hisses through his clenched teeth. I can finally see his focus return and his body relaxes as he falls onto me. I wrap my legs around his waist and lock my ankles to prevent him from leaving me. He rolls on his side facing me, and I whisper, "No. Stay with me. Don't leave." He lets out a big sigh and smiles at me, brushing the perspiration soaked hair from my eyes.

"My God, you are so fucking beautiful, Ana," he reverently strokes the side of my face.

I take his hand and gently bring it to my lips for a soft kiss. "I love you so much I almost can't endure it, Christian."

Christian pulls me closer and seals his mouth over mine parting my lips and giving me confirmation that he is mine and only mine.


	3. Chapter 3

_**Fifty Shades…Full Circle**_

**Chapter 3**

God, there's the alarm. Thank heaven it's on Christian's side of the bed. I can feel him peel himself off of me and turn over to slap it into submission. He turns back and pulls me to him nuzzling his nose in my hair. "Mmmmm. It's too early," he groans.

"Are you sick? You're always up early," I groan back.

"Oh, I'm up. I'm just not ready to get out of bed. You're nice and warm," he says in his gravelly morning voice.

"I'm warm because you sleep all over me," I tell him as I turn over to face him.

I barely open my eyes to let the light in. Christian still has his closed. "You make a nice pillow," he sighs as he runs his hands over my body. "Your lady parts are soft."

I snort and smile at him. "Your boy parts aren't," I can feel his morning excitement.

"My boy parts like your lady parts. It's a match made in heaven," he gives me a sleepy grin.

"Well my lady parts need to get up and get your son off to school," I moan as I turn over on my back and stare at the ceiling. Christian moves over and puts his chest on mine as he kisses my neck. "Baby. I need to get up," I plead.

"Let Gail get the little intruder up and ready," he whispers.

"Teddy likes for me to get him up in the mornings," I tell him.

"Well Christian likes for you to get him up in the mornings too. I was here before he was. I have squatter's rights."

"Christian's already up," I sit up and swat his butt and throw the covers off. "Go get a shower."

"What am I supposed to do with this?" He looks down at his morning erection.

"Well. It looks like a personal problem to me. How do you usually handle it?" I ask.

"My beautiful wife usually takes care of it," moving over he leans up on his elbow and nips at my breast through my gown.

"You are one spoiled little boy. I've been far too good to you, Mr. Grey," I smile down at him and pull my hair out of my eyes.

"I know. Too late to change now," he grins and cups the back of my head as he pulls me down for a kiss. He pushes me down and crawls on top of me and I'm a goner. Teddy will have to wait to get up until after daddy is down.

* * *

"Good morning sleepyhead," I kiss my baby's little copper head. "Time to get up for school baby."

Teddy growls and groans and rubs his eyes. "Do I have to, Mom?"

"Yes, you have to. But, it's Friday. Last day this week," I rub his head. "Remember tomorrow dad's going to take you and get you a suit for Aunt Mia's wedding. You have that to look forward to. I imagine he'll take you out to lunch too. "

"I forgot about that. Why do I have to have a suit?" he asks.

"Because Aunt Mia and Uncle Ethan invited you and Grace to be at their wedding and you have to wear a suit to the wedding." They invited Grace against my better judgment. She's still in that screaming phase. Since Christian and I are both in the wedding I guess Gail will have to go to look after her. Christian is really dragging his feet on this. He would rather have eaten hot nails than be in this wedding, but Mia gave him the sweet, 'you're my wonderful big brother' look and stroked him a bit and he relented. He's such a social butterfly.

"But why do I have to wear a suit just because it's a wedding?" he wines.

"Teddy you've never had a suit and it's time you got one. Ask your dad. He's the man who knows about suits." I'm surprised he hasn't gotten a Teddy a tux he's so fond of them.

"Come on, big guy. Get up and get dressed. What do you want for breakfast?" I ask him.

He finally sits up and slumps over. "I think I want macaroni and cheese."

"For breakfast?" I ask.

"Yep." He nods.

"No bacon, eggs or pancakes?" I ask him.

"Why do I we always have to have breakfast food for breakfast? If macaroni and cheese is good for dinner, why isn't it good for breakfast?" he shrugs and asks.

It's far too early for these 'what's the meaning of life?' questions. "I'll see if Gail has any left over. I'm not going to ask her to make it from scratch, besides there isn't time for that." I pat his leg. "Now get up mister. If you hurry you can eat with your dad."

Teddy races out of the bed and heads for his bathroom. I get up and head back to our bedroom. Christian is just getting out of the shower, and is wrapped in a towel brushing his teeth. I go over to my sink and begin to brush mine. "Don't forget, you have to take Teddy to get a suit and dress shoes tomorrow," I remind him.

"Hmm. Thanks. I had forgotten. Why is it he needs a suite again?" he asks.

I shake my head. "He needs one for the wedding."

"He doesn't have one?" he asks.

"If he had one, he wouldn't need one," I tell him. " And take him to lunch while you're out. Make a dad and son day out it. It's special to get your first real suit. He'll remember it."

"Should I get him his first real girl, too? " he grins. "We could make it a really special dad and son day."

"Not if you want to come home."

"Oh, you're no fun. I need to make sure my genes are passed on." He tells me as he lathers up his face to shave.

"You've done enough passing of the genes. I think your place in history is preserved, Mr. Grey." I swat him on his butt. "I'm going to go down and have Gail get Teddy's breakfast ready. What do you want?"

He shrugs, "Doesn't matter. Omelet I guess. And some toast and coffee."

"Will do Mr. Grey, sir." I run by him and yank his towel off as I pass him. "See you down stairs." I yell back at him.

"Good morning, Gail. How are you this morning?" I walk over and peer into the refrigerator.

"I'm good, how are you this morning?" she asks.

"Pretty good. Gail do we have any leftover macaroni and cheese?" I ask her with my head in the fridge.

"I think so, unless Mr. Grey got up and ate it last night," she says. "It should be on the second shelf in a container."

"Here it is." I grab the container and back out of the cold box, closing the door. As I back up I bump into a wall. I look around and see it's Taylor. "Oh, good morning Jason."

"Ms. Grey." He nods and smiles.

Gail hands him a cup of coffee and he takes a sip as he leaves the kitchen. It's sort of like living in a dorm.

"Why do you need the macaroni and cheese?" Gail asks.

"Teddy asked for it for breakfast," I tell her.

"Mac and cheese? For breakfast?" she asks.

"Yep. I couldn't think of a reason to say no," I tell her as I take the top off and put it in the microwave. "Mr. Grey wants an omelet with toast and coffee please."

"How about you , Ana? What would you like?" Gail asks.

"Oh," I give her a pensive look. "I'd like a firmer butt, ten minutes to myself and a date with George Clooney. But I'll settle for a cup of tea and some toast."

"Ouch." I feel Christian swat my ass.

"I like your butt just the way it is." He pecks my cheek.

I rub my butt, "Watch the butt. It had a bad experience last night."

"Seems to have come through it just fine, Mrs. Grey. No worse for the wear." He grabs a cup of coffee from Gail just as Master Theodore comes running in.

Gail shoos us out, "There are far too many bodies in my kitchen. Go! Go sit down." The three of us go in and sit at the table. I take my tea and pour Teddy a glass of milk before sitting down.

Gail brings in Christian's omelet and a plate of toast, then puts Teddy's mac and cheese in front of him.

Christian peers over and eyes the mac and cheese. Go on, say something sarcastic about the boy's breakfast, Mr. Grey. He gives Teddy a snide look and a pout, "I was going to eat that later," he whines.

"I got it first, dad." Teddy tells him as he shoves a big forkful in his mouth and smiles at his dad.

I look at Christian and shrug, "Squatter's rights."

Walking out to the SUV with Christian and Teddy, I walk around and give Teddy a kiss good bye. "Have a good day baby and good luck on your spelling test." Walking around to the other side I lean in to kiss Christian good bye. As I lean in he grabs me and half dragging me the car he gives me a big deep kiss. "Good bye Mrs. Grey. Thank you for a most pleasurable morning." I shake my head as I climb back out of the SUV. "Make yourself useful and go to work." I sigh at him. "I'll see you both this evening." I wave in at Taylor. "Taylor be careful."

Walking back into the house with a big grin on my face I'm just thinking about my crazy husband. He's been in an awfully good mood lately. Maybe it's the thought of that new plane. Maybe it's because he's getting it on a regular basis again. He can get cranky when he goes without. Whatever, it sure is nice to see him so happy. I need to do some shopping. It's my plan for us to have a really nice weekend when we go to Houston. We haven't had a couple of days away in almost a year. We deserve it. But today I need to take Grace into town and get her something to wear to the wedding.

"Gail. I'm going to take Grace into town and find her a dress for the wedding." I tell her walking back into the kitchen.

" I need to get Grace up and fed and dressed," Gail says.

"I'll go see if she's awake," I tell her. Walking into Grace's room I see her twinkling blue eyes looking over at me. "Good morning sweet girl." I walk over and sit on her bed next to her.

"Hi, Mama." She grins up at me.

"Do you want to go to town with me and get a new dress?"

She grins and nods, "Uh, huh."

"Well okay. Let's get up and get some breakfast."

Grace gets up and runs to her bathroom pulling up her gown on the way to go potty. I do love the sound of the tinkle in the toilet. No more diapers or pull ups. Never again. Well, maybe I'm just a little sad not to have diapers again. I smile at my girl as she finishes and we walk down stairs to get something to eat.

Gail gives her breakfast while I go upstairs to get dressed.

Walking by Teddy's room I see Myra changing his sheets and cleaning up.

"Hi Myra. How's it going?" I ask her as I walk into Teddy's room

She continues her work, "Oh, hello Mrs. Grey. Everything is fine. I hope . I mean I hope everything is fine."

"You're doing a great job. I just wanted to know how you are doing. Are you getting along here okay?"

"Yes ma'am. I really like working with Gail." I go to the other side of the bed and grab part of the clean sheet and help her make the bed. "Oh, no, Mrs. Grey. I can do it."

"That's okay Myra. I don't mind helping make a bed. I just wanted to make sure that you are happy here and that everything is going well. "

"Yes, ma'am. I think so. I really appreciate the job. I needed something full time."

"Well, we're glad that you are here. If you need anything, just let me know, okay?" I tell her.

She gives me a huge smile and goes about her work.

I'm finally dressed and grab my purse going down to Grace's room. Gail has her all dressed in a cute pink smocked bishop's dress, with ruffle panties and Mary Janes with socks.

"Thanks Gail. I'll get her hair combed." Grace really hates this. Her hair is so fine and in curls. It gets knotted so easily and it really hurts to try to get a brush through it. The longer it gets the worse she hates to have it fooled with. I carefully get the brush through it without too much opposition and get a barrette in it. I started to do pigtails, but this will work better to try on dresses.

"Aren't you beautiful?" I tell her. "Come on baby. Let's go get you a pretty dress."

I get my girl all strapped in her car seat in the A8. Can't take the R8 with a car seat. We head into town and I put the satellite radio on Kids Place for Grace. I look back to see her rockin' out in her car seat. She's just so damn cute.

We finally find the store and I get her out of the car and we go inside and begin looking through all the clothes. She is such a girl. She loves everything she sees. The sales lady is just having the best time showing her everything. I keep trying to remind them that we are here for a dress for the wedding, but it's no use.

Finally we find what I'm looking for. We spend an eternity in the dressing room trying on and hanging up, until Grace becomes cranky and I realize that it is almost lunch time. We trod to the counter and I pay for the stack of clothes that we have picked out as well as one ivory silk smocked dress with delicate soft pink roses appliqued to the smocking and a big bow tied in the back for the wedding. In addition to two bathing suits, three rompers, shorts, T-shirts, a summer cardigan and several sundresses. I can't believe the bill when everything is added up. She's a baby for Christ sake. How much can a half a yard of material cost? But at least she is a happy girl and I have a lot of her things for summer. The clerk helps us out to the car with our loot and I get Grace back in her car seat.

"Are you hungry baby?" I ask her.

She nods,"Uh huh."

"Okay. Let's go find something to eat." I tell her as we pull back out into traffic. Passing Grey House I make the terrible mistake of telling her that that's where Daddy works.

"That's Grey House, baby. That's our building and Daddy works there." I tell her.

"Daddy! Daddy!" she starts yelling. "Go see Daddy!"

"Baby we can't just go bother daddy. He's busy." I try to tell her.

"My bewding. Go see daddy!" She continues to beg and begins to cry.

Well, shit. I guess I can take her in and let her look around. Maybe Christian isn't too busy. I hate dropping in on him with a child. I pull into the garage and the valet comes around to open my door. Giving him the keys I walk to the back door and get Grace out of the car seat.

"Come on Baby. Let's go see if daddy's busy."

"My bewding. See Daddy." Now she has a grin on her face.

I take her hand and we walk into the lobby. Her eyes are like saucers as she looks around at all the people bustling around going about their work day. We pass the security guard. "Hello, Mrs. Grey." He smiles at me. "And who do we have here?" he looks down at Grace.

"My bewding." She grins at him.

He laughs at her, "Well I guess this must be Miss Grey. How do you do?"

"I go see daddy," she smiles up at him.

"Yes. I'm afraid this is Miss Grace Grey. I doubt she'll be a security risk at least not for a while yet."

We pass the guard and walk to the elevators. "We're going for a ride in the elevator Grace."

"My elwelbator?" she asks.

"Yes. I guess it is your elwelbator." I mumble as the doors open and we get on. Grace's eyes get big as the car begins to glide upward to Christian's sandstone and glass aerie. Finally the doors slide open and Andrea sees us exit the car.

"Mrs. Grey. What a surprise," she greets us.

"Andrea if Mr. Grey is busy, we can just look around and go. He's not expecting us. Grace was having a fit to come see him. "

"Actually he is in a meeting, but he should be about finished. "Why don't you have a seat. I'm sure he'd like to see you," she smiles at us.

She looks down at Grace, "And how are you sweetheart? Don't you look pretty today?"

All Grace can say is, "Mine." She is her father's child.

I suddenly hear a door slam and hear a familiar voice, "God damn it, don't you ever fucking come to a presentation that fucking unprepared again. That piece of shit should never have left the drawing board. I don't pay you to sit around with your thumb up your fucking ass. I expect you to be able to field any fucking questions they throw at you." Christian is absolutely fuming. "That was just fucking pathetic." He stops and turns to the poor man who is following two steps behind him to start yelling at him again. "I didn't get this goddamned company to position it is today with fucking displays like that. Now get back to your office, while it's still yours and don't come back up here until you can find a way to fucking turn that piece of shit around."

"But, Mr. Grey, it was just one issue. There was no way we could have possibly…"

"No! There is no excuse, so don't even fucking try," Christian chastises him.

"DADDY!" I hear Grace squeal before I can manage to get a hand over her mouth, because I have both hands over her ears.

Holy shit! Christian is going to be livid, not that he isn't already.

Instead, his expression softens when he hears Grace and when he sees her he holds his arms out for her. "Come here, baby girl."

Grace hold out her arms and runs to Christian who grabs her and lifts her in his arms. "What are you doing here sweetie?" he asks as he kisses her cheek.

The poor man following Christian slinks away like a condemned man who just got a reprieve.

"Mine, Daddy." She smiles at him.

Christian walks toward me. "Christian. I'm so sorry. Grace was having a fit to see you. I should never have dropped by with her unannounced."

"Why not?" he asks. "I always want to see my girls."

"Well. It just seems to be a bad time for us to be here," I try to tell him.

"Nonsense," he gives me a quick kiss. "Come down to my office." He turns and walks toward his office still carrying Grace.

"Grace this is daddy's office," he tells his little girl.

"Mine, daddy," she tells him.

He gives me a quizzical look . "I told her this was our building and now she calls everything hers."

"Well, it is hers. Isn't it Miss Grey?" he smiles at her and she nods back.

Christian puts Grace down and gives me a hug. "What are you ladies doing in town?" he asks.

"I needed to get Grace a dress for the wedding so we came into town to shop. I was on the way to take her to lunch when she had a fit to come see you."

"So you haven't eaten yet?" he asks.

"Nope. Not yet."

"Well, I can certainly buy my two favorite girls something to eat," he smiles at me.

"Oh, sweetheart. I didn't mean to interrupt you. Really, we just stopped by for a second."

"You don't want to eat with me?" he asks.

"No that's not it. I don't want you to think you have to drop everything and take us out just because we stopped by."

"I don't have to do anything. I want to take you. Besides, I've never taken my daughter to lunch in the city before," he rubs her little head.

"It's up to you. We'd love to go eat with you."

Christian puts his arms around me, "You sure are cute for an old married lady with a kids." He kisses me.

"Gee. Thanks. I think." I give him a smirk.

Christian wants to go to the club for lunch. I hate to take Grace somewhere and have her disrupt the entire restaurant. There are usually multiple business lunches going on there. I think Christian just wants to show her off. She seems to be a hit. Everyone tells her how beautiful she is and she is lapping it up. Christian seems to be enjoying it as well. Grace eats her hamburger and fries without throwing any. I think Christian has finally broken her of that. After a nice lunch, we drop daddy back at work and Grace and I start to head home. Looking back at her, her hair is such a mess. "Grace I think we need to see about getting you a haircut." She's never had a haircut before, but she hates dealing with it so much. Maybe a shorter cut would be cute for summer. Now that Elena is in the great Play Room in the sky, I feel more comfortable going back to see Ron. I pull out my phone and call over and he has a few minutes to work us in.

We pull in at the salon and I take Grace in to see Ron. "Ana, Ana, Ana. Darling it's so good to see you. It's just been ages." Ron gives me an air kiss. "And who is this precious little person?" he asks looking down at Grace.

"This is Grace. Ron I hate to tell you, but she's never had a haircut. I don't know how she'll act." I tell him.

"She will be beautiful when we get through, won't you darling?" He looks down at Grace.

"Grace gives him a big grin and nods in agreement."

"Well, okay. Let's get this show on the road," I tell him.

We get Grace in the chair to get her hair washed and she looks terrified. I hold her hand and try to sooth her as Ron leans the chair back and tries to wet her hair. Bless her little heart, she has no idea what's going on. With much encouragement and a lot of promises we get her hair washed and I take her over to the chair for her cut. The technician puts a booster seat in the chair for her and we get her on it and get a cape around her neck. I try to explain what's going on and that we are going to give her a big girl haircut. I'm not so sure this is going to work. I can see the tears begin as poor Ron starts to section her hair.

"Baby, it's going to be okay. This will make it so much easier to take care of your hair. Please, don't cry baby." Poor Ron is about to have a breakdown. I think he needs a drink or valium or both. We finally decide that I will sit in the chair and Grace can sit on my lap to get it cut. This goes much better. By the time Ron is finished, Grace is just cute as a button and I'm covered in hair. It really is great looking. It is a cute little bob about chin length, longer on the sides and tapered in the back. Grace is all smiles and Ron has survived.

"Grace! You are just beautiful! You look like a big girl." I try to really over do the compliment.

"Ron it really is cute. I appreciate it so much," I tell him.

"Oh, heavens. She did great. I'm just so glad I don't have kids," he gushes as he fans himself.

"I need to get mine cut, but I'll make an appointment and come by myself," I tell him.

"How are you all doing without Ms. Lincoln?" I ask him as we walk to the front of the salon.

"Just perfect, thank you very much. Between you and me, I couldn't stand the Ice Queen," he lowers his voice. " Frankly , I was about to go and open my own place. I had just about had all I could stand from old Maleficent."

"Didn't she do a good job running the place?" I ask.

"Yeah. Running it into the ground," he says. "That was the meanest damn woman I ever ran into. I swear, there were times I thought she was either going to hit me or try to fuck me. And frankly, I'd prefer that she hit me."

I laugh at him. "I'm so sorry, Ron. I had no idea."

He rolls his eyes and sighs, "Good riddance to bad trash, I say. And believe me she was trash. That woman acted like given half a chance, she'd jump the gear shift in that ridiculous Mercedes of hers, and some mornings, I'm not so sure she hadn't."

I can't help but laugh at him. "Ron. We shouldn't speak ill of the dead."

"Hell, that woman was too damn mean to really die. I keep looking over my shoulder every time I feel a cold chill in the room."

"Well I guess we'd better go. Thanks Ron. I appreciate you taking the time to do Grace for me."

"Oh, anytime, Ana. And come see me we'll get you all gorgeoused up," he waves good bye to us.

"Grace wave bye to Ron. Can you say thank you?" I tell her as I take her by the hand.

She looks up at him and waves as we go to leave, "Tank ou, Won."

"You are welcome, baby girl. We'll see you next time," he waves to us.

"Well, Miss Grace. We've had a big day. Let's go home and see Gail and Teddy. Daddy will be home in a while, too. And you have missed your nap time." My girl and I head back to the manor house after our big girl day in town. I look back and she is sound asleep in her car seat.


	4. Chapter 4

**Fifty Shades…Full Circle**

**Chapter 4**

Teddy and I are in is room and I'm helping him get changed into his play clothes. Actually I'm just spending some time with him. "How did your test go today?" I ask him.

"Pretty good. I missed one word," he tells me.

"I'm sorry. Which word?" I ask him.

"Table. I got the 'l' and the 'e' messed up."

"Oh. That's easy to do sometimes. We can work on it," I tell him.

"I have to write it ten times and turn it in Monday," he rolls his eyes and shakes his head.

"Are you looking forward to going into town with your dad tomorrow?" I ask him.

"Yep. He said after we get the suit, we can go look at his glider. That'll be really neat." He looks so excited.

"ANA!" it sounds like a rogue elephant is bellowing at me from downstairs. "ANA GREY!" Good lord, what's up with him.

I roll my eyes and walk down the hall and down stairs. Christian is in the foyer holding Grace.

"What is it?" I ask.

"Where the fuck is her hair?" he asks.

I give him a really evil look for using the 'F' bomb in front of our 3 year old.

"First of all watch it. Second, what do you mean, 'where's her hair'?" Walking up to him I plant myself in front of him.

"Look at her head. What happened to her hair?" he asks.

"I got it cut. Why?"

"You didn't talk to me about it," he insists.

"I wasn't aware I had to," I tell him.

"She's my daughter too and I'd appreciate being consulted before you do anything this drastic."

"Christian, it's a haircut, not a tattoo," I tell him.

"I liked it long."

"Well, you didn't have to wash it three times a week and fight her to get it combed every morning. It hurt her to go through that. This will be so much better." I tell him.

"But I like long hair," he informs me.

"She's your daughter, not a sub."

"That was below the belt," he snaps at me.

"Yes, it was. I'm sorry. But she's a little girl. It's cute."

Grace starts to shed tears.

"Christian, you've hurt her feelings. Tell her you like it," I whisper to him.

"But I don't."

"Tell her anyway," I insist.

Christian kisses Grace, "Daddy didn't mean to yell, baby. I really like your hair. Do you like it?"

Grace nods and sniffles.

"Well, then that's all that counts, as long as you like it." He hugs her and puts her down.

"Christian it was just a spur of the moment thing. We were in town, Ron had an opening. I really had no idea it would bother you like this," I try to tell him.

"She's my daughter, too and you could have at least called me first." I follow him upstairs as he loosens his tie and unbuttons his shirt.

"Do you mean to tell me that I am supposed to call you and get you out of some multibillion dollar meeting just to ask for your permission to cut our daughter's hair?" I ask him. "Well, I don't recall you asking me when you had Teddy's hair cut for the first time."

He turns to talk to me as he takes his shirt off. "That was different."

"Just how was it different?" I ask. "He's my first child. It was his first haircut. You just took him into town and had it cut." I try to remind with him.

"It was so long he was beginning to look like a girl. If I had left it up to you, you would never have cut it."

"Oh, don't be ridiculous. Of course I would have gotten it cut. All I'm asking is how is it different from Grace?" I ask.

"It just is," he tells me as he gets out of his dress slacks.

"Brilliant argument. I'm surprised you aren't practicing law." I'm really disgusted with him right now. "And I am going to kill you if you don't watch your gutter mouth in front of the children," I tell him. "Really Christian, I'm getting pissed off about it. I hate that my children have to hear that word," I chastise him.

"What are you talking about? I try to watch it, but I've been saying it all my life," he argues as he slips his T-shirt on over his head.

"Just because you've said it all your life is no excuse." I insist.

"You sound just like my mother," he snipes.

"Don't you even go there, Christian Grey. I wouldn't have to say anything if you would stop acting like a petulant child."

"Petulant child? Me?" he points to himself.

"Yes. You." I stare at him. "Stamping your feet and peppering your rants with the F bomb is not an adult way to act. Christian. I don't care if you use it as every other word, just not in front of our kids, _please._"

"Well, _fuck_ it," he glares over at me.

"I rest my case. "Turning and walking out of the room, I head back down stairs. "And grow up."

Grace is playing with bunny in the family room and I pick her up giving her a hug. I sit on the couch and put her in my lap. I'm trying very hard not to cry. I will not let that man make me cry. Asshole. He may get away with it at work, but not with me.

Christian comes down stairs and into the family room sitting on the couch, but not saying a word. "Grace, why don't you show daddy the pretty clothes you got today."

"Okay. Daddy see my cwothes?" she asks her dad.

"Sure sweetheart. Let me see them," he says staring at the TV.

"Try to be nice and say you like them, please," I ask him.

For that I get a sideways glare from him. Grace comes back dragging the bag full of clothes that is almost as big as she is. "Daddy, look." She pulls a sweater out of the bag and holds it up in her hand in front of her dad.

"That's nice baby. Did you pick that out?" he asks.

Grace nods and then drops the sweater, digging back into the bag of clothes.

"Hey Dad. Will you watch TV with me?" Teddy asks.

"Later son. I'm looking at Grace's things right now," he tells Teddy. Teddy looks so disappointed.

Grace pulls a sundress out of the bag and holds it in front of Christian. "He looks down at the bag and asks me, "How much did you buy today?"

Christian never gripes about spending money or what I buy. He really is pissed. But not near as pissed as I am right now.

"Hey, Dad?" Teddy asks.

"What is it son?" he sounds so irritated.

"Will you help me with my spelling? I missed a word today," he asks.

"Later Teddy. I told you, right now I'm seeing what Grace bought today," he tells him again.

I can see Teddy is taking this personally. He looks hurt.

Grace pulls out her two piece bathing suit. Bottom in one hand and top in the other. It's pink with ruffles on the butt and bows on the straps. "Look Daddy. Baving suit."

"What kind of a bathing suit is that?" he looks horrified.

"What's wrong with it?" I ask him.

"There's nothing to it. That's what's wrong with it."

"What are you talking about? It's fine. It looks small because she is small. It covers her up."

"She can't wear that ," he scoffs. "Why can't she wear a one piece?"

"We got her a one piece, too. She liked this one and wanted it." I tell him. "It's fine."

"I don't think so," he snaps at me

"Last year she was running around in a diaper and nothing else, on the boat. You didn't seem to mind that," I remind him.

"She was a baby."

"Christian what is wrong with you tonight?" I ask him.

"Nothing's wrong with me." He runs his hand through his hair; a definite giveaway. " It's that haircut," he tells me.

"What?" I ask.

He pulls Grace in his lap and gives her a big hug. "She doesn't look like a baby anymore."

"Baby. You can't stop her from growing up. It's gonna' happen whether you like it or not."

"This afternoon she was my baby with ruffles on her panties and now she looks like a little girl."

"I know, but you're going to need to adjust. You can't stop her from growing up." I try to sympathize even though I'm still mad.

"I know, but I don't have to like it."

Grace gets down and runs over to Teddy who is playing with his Snap Circuits. She grabs a piece of the toy away from him. "Grace! Give that back!" he yells at her.

"Grace! Give that back to your brother. Right Now. That's not nice." I tell her.

"Nnno!" Grace pouts, and throws the toy piece at him. Teddy reaches out and gives her a big shove and she hits the ground. She starts to cry and Christian jumps up and picks her up.

"Theodore! Why did you do that?" he asks Teddy.

" 'Cause she took my stuff," he says looking so guilty.

"What have I told you about pushing Grace?" he asks.

"Not to do it." he looks straight at the floor.

"Well, I'm tired of telling you. This time you're grounded. Now go to your room and get your pajamas on. No TV, no computer, no video games," he sternly says.

"But dad…"

"No buts and no excuses. Just do what I told you to do."

Teddy looks crushed. I hate this, but Christian has warned him about pushing Grace. Teddy stumbles off toward his room. I can see his little chin trembling. He's trying so hard not to cry. Then I hear him start to cry as he runs for his room. I get up to go see about him.

"Don't you dare," Christian tells me.

"Don't I dare what?" I ask.

"Don't you go up there. He disobeyed me and this is between him and me," Christian insists.

"But, he's just a little boy. He's never gotten into trouble before and he's never been punished before," I plead.

"Well he is now. He has to learn. When I tell him something I mean for him to listen to me."

I've never seen him like this. "How long are you going to leave him up there?" I ask.

"Until I'm ready to let him out. It won't hurt him. I spent half my formative years grounded in my room," he reminds me.

"Well he's not you." I tell him. Besides, I doubt seriously Teddy's been drinking, fighting or fornicating, but I dare not say it.

"Don't interfere with this, Ana. I mean it." he warns me. "He's getting big enough to be punished when he disobeys." He looks over at me. "And you can quite pouting about it."

"What are you going to do? Send me to my room too?" I ask sarcastically.

"Don't tempt me."

Gail finally lets us know dinner is ready. "Are you going to let him eat?" I ask.

"Don't be ridiculous. Of course I'm going to let him eat." Christian tells me.

"I'll go get him." I tell Christian.

"Just keep your seat. I put him up there; I'll go get him," he says.

Christian returns with Teddy. I can see by his little red eyes, he's been crying. Teddy is in his pajamas. He isn't talking. Christian puts his food on his plate and Teddy just looks at it.

"Eat your dinner, son," Christian tells him.

Teddy picks up his fork and picks at his food. I give him a sympathetic look. I really want to give him a hug. He's not used to being punished. I hope Christian understands that he needs to talk to him and really explain why he's being punished.

Grace is her usual upbeat self. She jabbers away while she gets half her food in her mouth.

"Deddy." She looks over at Teddy and he ignores her. "DEDDY!" she screams.

"What?" he answers with contempt.

Grace just gives him a big grin and opens her mouth to show him her chewed food. "Grace. Stop it. Do you need to go to your room?" Christian tells her.

She shakes her head, "No, no."

This is a really pleasant evening. Can't remember when I've had a nicer one. Christian scarfs down his roast beef and roasted new potatoes with asparagus and hollandaise. Teddy and I pick at our food. Grace acts like a little monkey.

We finally get Grace to bed and Teddy is back in his room. "May I go say goodnight to my son?" I ask Christian.

"Ana, just stop it. Go tell him goodnight. He's in his room, not San Quentin," Christian tells me as he undresses. "I'm going to relax in the tub for a while, so take your time."

I walk into Teddy's room and he is lying on his bed reading a book. "Hi, sweetheart. Are you okay?" I ask as I sit down on his bed with him.

He nods, but then starts to cry. "Mom. Daddy doesn't love me anymore."

Pulling him to me I put my arms around him. "Baby, that's not true. Your daddy loves you more than anything."

"Not more than Grace," he sniffles.

"No he loves you both the same." I tell him running my fingers through his curls. "Why do you think he doesn't love you anymore?"

"Because every time I tried to talk to him he wanted to be with Grace."

"Teddy. You've had your dad pretty much to yourself all these years. Grace is growing up and she needs to spend time with him too. You are just going to have to learn to share. Your dad has to spend some time with Grace just like he does with you."

"But she's a girl," he looks up at me.

"Yes. But she still loves her dad just like you love him. And she wants and needs to have time with him too." I try to explain. "Can you understand that?"

"I guess."

"It's hard I know. But your dad loves each of you just the same and he wants to spend time with each of you. Just because he is talking to Grace doesn't mean that he doesn't want to talk to you, it just means that you might have to wait until he's finished talking to Grace." I kiss his forehead. "Does that make sense to you?"

"Yes. But I miss him so much," his little voice trembles.

"Honey, why do you miss him? He's right here."

"I don't know. I just miss him when I can't talk to him," he wipes the tears from his face.

Poor little thing is so jealous and he just doesn't understand it.

"You can always talk to him. You just might have to wait your turn sometimes," I try to explain. "I know Grace can be very aggravating, but she's still little right now. You are a lot bigger and older than she is and you can't just hit or push her when you get angry with her. If she bothers you, then come tell me or your dad or Gail and we'll help you with it."

"How long do I have to be in here?" he asks me.

"Baby, I don't know. I doubt it will be long," I tell him. You just need to remember that when your dad or I tell you something, you need to listen to us." I tell him. "Your dad has you in here to think about what you did so you won't do it again. He knows how you feel. He was grounded when he was a little boy..…a lot."

"He was?" he asks so surprised.

"Yep. You can ask him about it. I think that's how he learned to like reading so much. He always read a book while he was grounded."

"Wow! Dad's read lots of books. He must have been grounded a lot."

"Well, he didn't read everything while he was grounded. He read other times, too." I tell him.

"Are you ready to get between the sheets?" I ask.

"Yes, ma'am." I pull his sheets back and he crawls between them. I tuck him in and give him a goodnight kiss. "You sleep tight. You have a big day tomorrow. I love you, baby."

"I love you too, Mom."

I turn out his light and walk back into our bedroom. Stripping down as I walk into the bathroom I get into the tub with Christian. He is almost asleep, neck deep in the warm water.

"Is he still alive?" he asks me.

"Yes, but you need to go talk to him. He thinks you don't love him anymore." I tell him.

"He'll get over it, but I'll go talk to him anyway," he has his head tilted back on the tub and his eyes closed.

"You don't care that he thinks you don't love him?" I ask.

"I thought my father fucking hated me most of my life. He kept me in my room more than he let me out," he smirks. "I got over it."

"Did you?" I ask.

"What do you mean by that?" he looks at me.

"You just have never seemed particularly close to Carrick."

"Dad never was much of one for physical affection, but then neither am I. I guess we just understood one another. Doesn't mean we're not close," he explains.

"Is something going on you need to talk to me about?" I ask.

"Why would you say that?" he asks.

"You just seem a little on edge, that's all." I tell him.

He rubs his eyes ,"Yeah. I guess I need to tell you."

"Tell me what?" I ask.

"After you and Grace left today, Thompson came up to my office. Elena's attorney had contacted him. It seems that Elena made me her sole heir."

"What?"

"Yep. She left everything to me. All of her businesses, property, stock portfolios, her house, money, jewelry. The whole fucking shooting match."

"Christian. What are you going to do with it?" I ask.

"Well first of all I'm going to have that playroom dismantled before anyone sees it. Then I'll sell the house, I guess," he leans back and stares at the ceiling. "I'll probably liquidate a lot of it then put it, as well as the businesses into a trust and give it to some charity. I don't want any of her fucking money."

"Well, you certainly don't need it." I smile at him. "I told you she was in love with you."

"Elena was just fucked up. I have no idea why, I never bothered to try to find out why, she just was," he sighs. "I don't think she really loved anyone but herself. I'm not even sure she loved herself."

"Christian. How are you? I mean with Elena being gone. How are you dealing with it?" I dare to ask.

"I really haven't thought about it. I guess I'm relieved. Things have been a lot less tense with her gone."

"Christian, does it bother you that I'm the one who is responsible for her death?" I ask.

"Ana. Why the fuck would you say that?" he asks. "Elena killed herself. You didn't have anything to do with it."

"I know that, logically. I guess since I physically pulled her over, I just feel sort of like I killed her or something."

Christian pulls me to him and wraps his arms around me. "Ana. I don't want you to ever think for one moment that you are in anyway responsible for that." He kisses my hair. "Baby. She pushed you. She is responsible for what happened to Sam and she killed herself in the process."

"I know." I begin to get teary. "I just feel bad about it. Maybe I feel guilty, because I hated her so much and somehow wished her dead."

"Baby, I hated her and I wished her dead, but I don't feel the least bit of guilt about it," he kisses my hair again. " She was just a lonely, fucked up woman trying to hold on to her youth."

"I think you need to add pedophile and homicidal maniac to that list." I think no matter what she's done, no matter how much he hates her, he is always going to have a soft spot for her. God, help me I don't know why and I don't even pretend to understand it. That's just the way it is. I've decided that there comes a time to just accept it and let it go. At least she's gone.

" I have no idea what finally sent her over the edge. No one came to her funeral except Linc. Not one of those boy toys, not one of her society friends, not one of her employees showed up. She had no family, that I know of," I can see him thinking. "You know, I think in spite of it all, Linc really cared about her. I think he has all these years, even after the divorce. I think he was disappointed that things turned out the way they did between them. He claimed her body and gave her a burial. He didn't have to do that."

"Well, I guess you just never know. What kind of charity are you thinking about?" I ask.

"I was thinking about something to do with child abuse. What do you think?" he asks.

"I think that is very appropriate, Mr. grey."

Christian is already in bed and leaning back against the headboard waiting for me. After slipping on a silk teddy and tap pants I slide in next to him.

"What time are you and Teddy leaving tomorrow?" I look up and ask him.

"I forgot about that," he yawns.

"You are still taking him aren't you? Oh, Christian, he's so looking forward to it." I hope he doesn't leave him in his room all day tomorrow.

"Yes. I guess we'll just leave whenever we get up. No rush since it's Saturday."

"Please try to have a good day with him. He's just jealous of the time you're spending with Grace. He doesn't know how to handle it." I try to explain.

"I know. I'll try to talk to him about it," Christian sighs.

"Christian, he loves you so much. I think it's just hard for him to handle it all. He's not a disobedient boy," I plead Teddy's case.

"You mean like me?" he grins.

"I'd better not ever catch him drinking and fighting." I smirk.

"You left out fucking." he says.

"I don't even want to think about it." I shut my eyes tight.

"It's gonna' happen one day you know," he tells me.

"I know. But not for a long time. He's my baby for a while longer."

Christian tilts my head up and pulls me to him putting his arms around me. He kisses me ever so sweetly. Then his hand begins to slide inside the front of my pants.

"Christian," I stop his hand. "I'm really not in the mood for that tonight. It's been a long, rough day."

"What do you mean not in the mood? When have you ever not been in the mood?" he asks.

"I don't remember, but I'm still not happy about the way you acted toward me about Grace's hair," I remind him.

"Baby, I was just pissed about it," he says. "I'm still not happy that you did that."

"I'll tell you what. You can washer hair and fight her to try to comb it out. Then you can harass me about getting it cut."

"Okay. Fine. I'll do it," he shrugs.

"When?" I ask.

"All this week. Tell Gail I'll wash her hair."

"Yeah, right," I doubt this seriously. "You haven't bathed her since she was six months old and had no hair." I turn over away from him and snuggle down under the covers.

"You mean I don't get points for offering to do Grace's hair," he asks.

"You'll get points when you do it." I tell him. "Christian, I'm just emotionally worn out tonight."

"Okay, I guess." He sounds like a pouty little boy, but he kisses me then rolls over and turns out the light. "Goodnight, sweetheart."

"Goodnight, baby," I tell him.

I can't sleep. So much has gone on today. Grace's hair, Teddy's grounding and then finally Elena's will. I just feel sad, because my little Sam always creeps into my thoughts when I think too much. I can feel my eyes welling with tears. Looking at the clock, it's 2:45. I need to get some sleep, but I can't stop everything that's in my head. I can hear Christian's steady breathing. He is sound asleep.

I can't believe Elena made him her sole heir. What will people think when they find out? What will his parents think? Maybe he can keep a lid on it, I hope. I need to go visit Sam. Christian rarely wants to go. I think it's just too much for him. He can't deal with it. We finally got his little headstone put up. We put that quote on there from, Horton Hears a Who, 'A person's a person, no matter how small.' I can't stop crying. I miss him so much.

I turn over and put my arms around Christian and it rouses him "Huh? What? What's wrong?" he's still so groggy.

"Will you hold me?" I ask.

He turns over and pulls me to him, "Come here baby. What's wrong?" he kisses my forehead.

"I just can't sleep. I need you," I tell him.

"I'm here. Are you crying?" he can feel the tears against his chest.

"Just a little. Not bad."

"Sam?" he asks.

"Partly. It's just been a very bad day," I tell him.

He strokes my hair, "Well, we'll make tomorrow a better day, okay?"

I nod against his chest. "Christian. I love you."


	5. Chapter 5

_**Fifty Shades…Full Circle**_

**Chapter 5**

"Hello. This is Ana Grey. May I please speak with Virginia Douglas?" I am trembling so much I can hardly hold the phone.

"Yes. Just one moment please."

The wait seems like an eternity. What does she want? What do I say to her? Why am I doing this?

"Mrs. Grey?" I can hear a soft voice coming through the phone. "This is Virginia Douglas."

"Mrs. Douglas. I received a message from you several months ago asking me to call," I tell her.

"Oh. I wasn't sure you had received it. It was so long ago. You are Ana Grey, Mrs. Christian Grey?" she asks me.

"Yes. I am. I wasn't sure just how to handle this and then we have had things come up that made it impossible for me to contact you."

"Yes. I know. I have followed the news reports lately. I'm sorry for your troubles."

"Thank you. May I ask why you contacted me?" I ask her.

"It's just as the note indicated. I am Christian's biological grandmother. His mother was my daughter, Ella, my only daughter. As you know, she is deceased and Christian is all I have left of her."

"That's what I understand. But what can I do for you?" I ask her.

"I have tried to contact Christian for some years now. So far I have been unable to. He is a difficult man to reach," she sighs.

"Yes. My husband doesn't take calls from or meet with anyone he doesn't know or doesn't have an appointment with. That's just the way he is."

"I see. That's why I was hoping that perhaps we could speak and that you could possibly pave the way for me to finally meet him."

"I'm not entirely sure about that, Mrs. Douglas. My husband is a very private person and he really doesn't appreciate anyone meddling in his business. That includes me. I'm taking a fairly big risk even contacting you," I explain.

"Mrs. Grey, would you consider meeting with me? I would be more than willing to fly to Seattle to see you. I would love the opportunity to explain a lot of things. I want Christian to know that he has a biological family."

"Mrs. Douglas, he knows. He knows who his mother and father were and he knows about you. He has just chosen, for his own reasons, not to reach out to you." I try to let her know what the situation is. "I'm not sure just how much I can help you. My husband is not a very flexible man."

"I understand," I can hear the tremble in her voice. "It's just…. he is all I have. Ellen was my only child and she is gone. I just wanted to see him."

"Well. There is a lot I'd like to ask you. Christian and I will be going out of town this week. When could you come to Seattle?"

" I can come at your convenience. I really have an open calendar. Perhaps week after next after you and Christian return. Shall I call you?"

"No. No, it would be better if I contact you. I'd rather you not call," I try to explain.

"Good. I'll wait to hear from you and then I'll make my travel arrangements."

"That sounds fine. I'll be in touch week after next then," I tell her.

"Mrs. Grey, Thank you. You have no idea how much this means to me."

"Well, don't thank me yet. My husband is a very stubborn man. I can't make you any guarantees that he will meet with you."

"I just really appreciate the opportunity to try. Thank you."

"Okay. I'll be in touch. Good bye, Mrs. Douglas. "

Oh, God, what have I done? I feel like I have just stirred a hornet's nest. I won't say a word about this to anyone until I've met and talked to this woman. I want to hear her side of things. If they don't ring true or if I see she is other than whom she says she is, then I don't have to say a word to Christian. I can just walk away from it. But if she is sincere, then maybe this would be beneficial to him. Maybe she can tell him things that a private detective can't; fill in some of the blanks and answer some of the questions. Maybe she can make him think more of himself. Take away some of the stigma he's been carrying around all his life.

I hope he and Teddy are having fun. This will be a good time for them to talk. I know Teddy needed to be disciplined, I just hated that it had to happen. I guess it's part of growing up and learning right from wrong and that actions have consequences. He's just such a good boy. He is jealous of Grace and doesn't know how to deal with it.

Christian has always been so good with him. I'm sure he didn't like having to do it either. I guess we have to grow as parents and learn to deal with things like this. They should be home shortly. It's getting close to dinner time and it's beginning to get dark outside.

I can see Grace sitting in front of the TV from my chair in Christian's office. She's had a quiet day with Teddy and Christian gone and Gail off. Just the two of us. She was so wound up yesterday with the shopping, lunch with her Dad and then the haircut and her episode with Teddy. She does aggravate him. But he needs to learn how to deal with it. He's going to run into a lot of aggravating people along the way in life. We probably need to start cracking down on her as well. She's going to be a handful.

I'd better get to the kitchen and get things out to start on dinner. They should be home anytime. Walking into the family room I spend a few minutes with Grace. She has her bunny and her blankie and looks like she is getting sleepy already. She had a short nap today.

Arriving in the kitchen, I check out the fridge to see what we have available to prepare. We eat so well when Gail cooks, I think we'll have a quick Saturday night dinner, hamburgers on the grill. Christian likes to grill. It's the only cooking he can do. Actually, I prepare everything and he places it on the grill and flips it. Ta da, he's cooking. I get out the meat, veggies, condiments and chips getting everything ready for the master chef. The table is set and everything is ready, I wonder where they are? Maybe they were having fun and lost track of time. It's dark now. I guess I could give Christian a buzz and see where they are. Looking out the window I finally see a set of headlights coming down the drive. Looks like they are home.

Finally my men come bursting through the door from the garage. Christian is carrying Teddy and they are laughing. Teddy puts his arms around Christian's neck and gives him a big hug, "Thanks Dad. I had fun."

Christian hugs him back and kisses him, "Me too buddy. Remember I love you? Okay?"

"Me too, daddy." Teddy tells him as Christian puts him down.

"Hello, guys. Did you have a fun day?" I ask.

"We did mom." Teddy smiles up at me.

"Run upstairs and get washed up. Dinner will be in a few minutes." I tell him as he takes off full speed upstairs.

"Well, you two seem to have made up." I tell Christian as I put my arms around his waist and give him a hug.

"Yep. We had a good long talk today. You're right, he's very jealous of Grace, but I think maybe today helped some." He smiles down at me.

"Good. I'm glad you got things sorted out with him."

He gives me a nice long kiss. "Mmm. Are you feeling better today?" he asks.

"Yes. It's been a quiet day with just Grace and me being here. She's been in a good mood and mostly played by herself. We did take a walk down to the water and looked for stuff."

"What sort of stuff?" he asks.

"Just stuff. Anything she finds is exciting to her; shells, rocks, trash."

"So, since you're feeling better today, do you think I might have a chance of getting lucky with my wife later?" he asks.

"I think we both might get lucky later. Very lucky," I smile up at him. "But first I need you to start the grill. We're having hamburgers for dinner."

"Okay. Let me take all this stuff up to Teddy's room and I'll be right back down." He gives me a quick peck.

"Oh, is that his suit?" I ask.

"Yep."

"Well, what does it look like?" I ask as I unzip the suit bag. It's the sweetest little dark blue suit. It looks just like Christian's only small. The bag has everything that goes with it, a white dress shirt, a little gray tie, black oxfords and matching belt and socks. He even got him new underwear to go with it.

"Wow. You really went all out with this stuff. Christian? Did you really pay this much for this suit?" I'm horrified when I look at the price tag.

"Yeah, why?" he asks.

"You do realize that he will probably outgrow it before he can wear it a second time."

"So? It's my sister's wedding. I want him to look good. Where are the burgers?"

"There in the fridge. They are ready to put on the grill," I tell him.

"What difference does it make?" he tells me. "I never look at price tags."

"I know. It just seemed a little wasteful."

Christian grabs the plate of meat and gives me a quick kiss on my head, "If it will make you feel better, I'll make him wear it every day. He can go out and play in it."

"Don't be silly. It's really nice. Did it look good on him?" I ask.

"Yep. He looked like a mini-me. Guess I can't deny that one," he grins.

"You'd better not ever try." I swat his butt as he heads out to the outdoor kitchen to 'cook'.

Christian has completed his culinary task and we are all consuming our dinner. I've got Grace's burger cut up in quarters making it easier to eat and Teddy is talking non- stop telling me about his day with his dad.

"Tell me what you did after you ate lunch and bought your clothes. You were gone a long time."

"Well, then we went out and saw the glider like dad promised." He tells me with a huge grin on his face.

"You did? Did you like it?" I ask. I look over and Christian has the strangest look on his face.

"Yes. Especially when dad took me for a ride." He grins.

"A ride?" I ask him

He nods, "Yes ma'am. Dad took me for a ride."

"In the glider?" I ask him.

"Yeah. It was really neat. We got hooked to an airplane with this big string and it pulled us waaay up high then, boom. It let us go and it flew off and we were just hanging there way up high." His little eyes are so big and he is making these grand gestures with his arms when he explains everything. " It got real quiet, then dad started flyin' it. He said we were chasing the sunset and we flew right straight for it."

I look over at Christian who appears to be swallowing his tongue along with his burger. We have talked about this and he knows I'm totally against taking Teddy up in the glider. "Well, baby it sounds like you had fun."

"I did Mom. After we flew around and around then dad landed it in a big field and someone came and picked us up. I saw all the buildings and trees and the ocean and the people from waaay up there." He is so enthusiastic and happy, I can't really be mad. "Can I have a glider when I get big?"

Listening to him brings tears to my eyes, he's so happy. "Well when you get big enough to afford one, you can have one I guess." I tell him. I keep staring at Christian thinking I'll catch his gaze, but he never looks at me. He looks like a man who is headed for the dog house.

"Do they cost a lot Dad?" he asks Christian.

"Well, son, yes they cost quite a bit," Christian tries to swallow his burger without choking, "but I'm sure when you get older we can talk about getting you one, if you're still interested."

"Can you teach me how to fly it, Dad?" he asks Christian.

"We'll talk about it when the time comes, Teddy. Now eat your dinner."

After finishing dinner, the kids have gone back to watch TV and Christian is actually helping me clear the table. He walks behind me putting his arms around my waist and nuzzling my neck. "So are we still on for later or did I ruin it with the glider?" he asks.

I turn around to face him and put my arms around his neck," First of all I would never use sex or the withholding of it as a way of punishing you. That's not fair and I think you know me better than that. Second, I think you took Teddy up just to spite me for cutting Grace's hair. Third, I'm not mad," I tell him.

"You're not mad at me?" he asks.

I shake my head. "No. Just listening to him and seeing how happy he was reminded me of when you took me up to chase the dawn. It made me remember how exciting it was and how much I loved it, and how much I loved you. It made me happy that Teddy was able to have that same feeling." I hug him. "Do you know how utterly amazing you are?" I ask him.

"Me? Amazing?" he looks perplexed.

"Yes. When you love someone, you try to give them so much. Your single focus is to make them happy and give them pleasure." I give him a soft kiss. "I could never be mad at you for trying to make Teddy happy."

"Anastasia, you are the damnedest woman I have ever met. You just never cease to amaze me."

"Save that comment for later on," I quickly kiss him.

"I've just never been able to figure you out. I have been worried all afternoon that you would be furious with me," he cocks his head and smiles.

"Oh, so you thought I'd be mad, but you did it anyway, huh?" I frown at him.

"Well…sort of…. yeah," he smirks.

"Maybe I should spank you later," I warn him.

"I'd like to see you try," he whispers against my lips just before kissing me.

"Just you wait. One day I'll turn the tables on you, Christian Grey."

"I can wait, Mrs. Grey," he whispers against my neck. "I have an idea."

"Mmmm. That feels good. Let me guess. Get the kids to bed and meet up in the bedroom."

"You are a mind reader, aren't you?"

Giving out a soft moan, "No. I just know my husband. I'll give you ten minutes to stop that."

"Mmm. Stop what?" he is kissing me so softly on my neck under my ear.

"Driving me crazy."

"How about I just take you right here and now?" he whispers.

"I wish. But we have kids in the next room. It probably would scar them for life." I try to push him away. "The sooner we get finished down here, the sooner we can get upstairs."

"Okay. You're right. Let's go." He finally relents.

"Give yourself a minute before you go get the kids. Let that thing go down." I give him a quick kiss and pop the hand towel on his crotch.

Walking in the family room I join Christian on the sofa. Teddy and Grace are on the floor playing and watching TV. "Thanks for helping me with dinner." I snuggle next to him and he puts his arm around me.

"Glad to do it."

"Isn't this nice?" I ask him. "No one is mad or crying or in pain or fighting. How long do you think it will last?" I ask him.

"Oh, probably not too long," he snorts and gives me a grin.

"What time is it?" he asks me.

"About 8:15. The kids have a little while before bed. It's a weekend," I tell him.

"Think we could lie and tell them it's a school night?" He asks.

"Teddy knows exactly what his bedtime is and he knows it's Saturday. You can't win that one."

"Well how about I kiss on your neck for the next forty five minutes or play with you knee?" he asks as he nuzzles my neck and traces his finger across the skin on my thigh.

"I won't stop you, but all you're doing is torturing both of us." I smile at him.

Christian is driving me absolutely out of my mind. He won't keep his hands off of me. The forty five minute wait to put the kids to bed seems like an eternity. Finally I give the ten minute warning. "Okay kids. Ten more minutes. Start picking your toys up and get ready for bed."

"Aww, Mom. It's Saturday. Can't we stay up just a little while longer? Please?" Teddy begs.

Before I can open my mouth Christian tells them, "Get your stuff put away and you can read for a while before lights out."

Teddy pouts, but he agrees. Grace is almost asleep on the floor. Christian picks Grace up with her blankie and bunny and puts her on his shoulder and I corral Teddy and we get everyone upstairs. Teddy goes to his room and gets his PJs on while Christian helps me get Grace in her nightgown without waking her. While I finish getting her tucked in, Christian goes to Teddy's room to tuck him in. We meet up in Teddy's room and I give him his goodnight kiss.

"Thirty minutes, then lights out, okay buddy?" Christian reminds him .

Teddy nods, "Night Mom. Night Dad."

Christian grabs me by my waist and picks me up carrying me to the bedroom. I can't help but giggle. He closes the door and grabs me sealing his mouth to mine and parting my lips.

"You didn't turn off the lights downstairs," I whisper.

"Leave 'em on," he whispers back as he devours my mouth.

I giggle, "No, you go turn them off and make sure the alarm is set and I'll get the shower turned on."

"Shit!...Okay. I'll be right back," he hits the door at a run heading down stairs.

I get the shower turned on and get the water warmed up. Before I can get out of my clothes Christian grabs me under my butt and lifts me up as he claims my mouth again. I circle his neck with my arms and his waist with my legs as he carries me into the bathroom and straight into the shower.

"Christian! We've still got our clothes on," I try to protest to no avail.

He pins me to the wall as he unzips his jeans and shimmies out of them. Then stands me up as he grabs my jeans and unzips them yanking them off. There isn't much talking just a lot of gasping and heavy breathing as he picks me up again and pins me against the wall. I gasp as I feel him thrust upward. "Oh, fuck that's good," he sighs. I cup his head in my hands and try to consume his mouth as he begins to pound upward. I jolt upward with each drive. Finally all I can do is lean back against the wall and accept the rabid onslaught of his desire. With each lunge upward he hits the engorged flesh inside of me sending me closer to the edge of my senses. "Fuck! You. Feel. So. Fucking. Good!" he synchronizes his words with his thrusts which are intensifying and becoming more rapid.

"God, baby. Shit." Is all I can get out between gasps.

"Are you ready?" he asks. "It's going to be quick this time."

"Almost. Don't stop. Don't stop." I gasp as I try to catch my breath.

"Come on, baby. Come for me. Come for me Ana," he growls against my skin.

"Okay. Almost. Just d.. don't stop," I gasp.

I can feel the pulling in my core as he is pushing me closer to my climax. I'm teetering on the edge as he fucks me and continues to consume my body for his pleasure; using it, teasing it, taking his pleasure from mine.

I lock my eyes to his as my body begins to accept the release he has driven me to. "Oh, yes. Christian! Yes." I whisper against his skin as I collapse, helpless in his embrace. I have no choice but to accept the intense waves of pleasure that he is giving me. He can push me to the point of not knowing who I am or where I am. All I know is the point where our bodies come together. That one point where we give everything we have to each other.

I can feel him brace as he puts everything he has into his last few drives. Just as the waves of my release begin to wane and I am regaining my senses, I can see Christian lose control as he surrenders his body to me. One final deep push and he stills as he growls, "Oh, God. Fuck me!" I can feel him tremble against me as his climax races through his body. Finally he relaxes and kisses me passionately, "God, I love you." He whispers against my mouth as he finally stands me on my feet and supports me as I gain my legs. We both try to catch our breath as we hold each other under the warm water and he traces his finger down my cheek as he gently kisses me.

"Damn that was quick," I note as we finally begin to breath and we remove our remaining wet clothes.

"I was about to die. I needed you," he tells me as he holds me against his wet, naked body. "We'll take our time later."

Christian and I take turns sliding the soapy bath sponge over each other. Sitting down on the shower bench I take in the view and watch as he washes his hair. My god, does he still have a body! I love to watch each muscle flex and relax as he moves. The water rushing over him only emphasizes his chiseled features. Abercrombie and Fitch ads have nothing on him. I've never been with anyone else, but I have seen pictures and …he _is_ very well endowed. Very well indeed. I struck gold my first time out with this man.

He's not perfect, but he does love me and he adores his children. He'd do anything for us and he keeps us safe and protected. We seem to be his reason for living. He can be short and demanding almost to the point of being rude with others at times. But he does have a good heart and people really have no idea just how much he does for others that no one ever knows about. If people only knew how much of his own money he spends getting food and clean water to people all over the world that wouldn't otherwise have access to it. Sometimes my heart wants to burst, I just feel so much for him.

"What?" he asks looking at me.

"Huh?" I ask.

"What are you doing?" he is rinsing all the soap out of his hair. "You're staring at me."

"I'm just taking in the view," I smile and tell him.

"Like what you see?" he grins.

"I sure do. I'm a very lucky girl, Mr. Grey." I get up and put my arms around his neck.

"I like to think that I'm a very lucky man, Mrs. Grey." He pulls me to him and I reach up and take his mouth with mine.

"I'm glad no one can hear us. They'd need an insulin injection." I smirk.

"I'm just glad they can't see us, because I'm just before fucking you senseless," he grins down at me.

"Promises, promises."

We get the water turned off and I get out and pitch him a towel. I slip on my big white terry robe to dry off and towel dry my hair and Christian is buffing his head with a towel to dry it.

"You do know you got a reprieve tonight."

"What are you talking about?" he asks.

"Saturday night is 'wash Grace's hair night'. She fell asleep before you could do it." I tell him.

"Well, I guess I'll just do it tomorrow night," he gives me a quick kiss and takes my towel out of my hand and starts to dry my hair.

"There. That's pretty dry," he tells me as he drops the towel. Then he picks up my brush and begins to brush the tangles out for me.

"Mmm. I like this," I tell him as our eyes meet in the mirror.

"I love your hair, Anastasia," he stops and whispers against my neck. "I love the way it falls around your breasts." He turns me to face him and slides my robe open and trails his kisses from my neck down to my breasts, cupping them in his hands and softly kissing them. I fist his hair in my fingers and pull him to me kissing his curls.

Christian stops kissing me and bends down to scoop me up in his arms. I put my arms around his neck and we walk back into our bedroom. He tosses me and I land on the bed bouncing a time or two and giggling. Christian instantly whips his towel off and he springs free. Crawling on the bed he parts my legs and hovers over me. I can feel his fingers slide over my crotch and it makes me quiver and jump when he touches me.

He gasps and smiles. "Why did you jump?"

"It makes me jump when you do that," I explain.

"Do what?" he asks with a sly smile.

"You know what."

"That?" and he strokes me again.

I gasp, "Yes that. Why do you always check to see if I'm wet?" I ask him.

"Because I don't want to hurt you when I enter you," he explains.

"But Christian, have I ever not been ready for you?" I stare up into his eyes.

He shakes his head, "No. You're always wet and ready."

"Christian. I just look at you and get wet." I pull his head down closer to mine. "Baby, I always want you," I whisper against his lips. I move my tongue and gently caress his lips with it before putting my mouth over his. He parts my lips and I can feel his tongue exploring my mouth almost taking my breath away.

I can feel his weight on me and I lift my legs sliding them up and down caressing his legs. I feel him as he probes against my opening teasing me with the promise of entering at any moment. Christian moves his mouth to my neck and I feel the warmth of his breath against my skin as he kisses the sensitive spot just below my ear. "God, you know it drives me crazy when you do that," I whisper to him.

"That's why I do it, baby. I like driving you crazy," he groans.

I'm writhing underneath his body. My body is aching for him, almost begging him to fuck me.

"Keep still," he whispers to me. "I'll take care of you. I'll always take care of you, Anastasia."

"It's so hard. I want you. I need you," I beg him.

"I know. I know , baby. Just slow down." He moves down trailing his tongue down my chest and between my breasts. He plants soft kisses across my belly as I clutch his hair in my hands. My belly heaves and quivers as he stops to caress my navel with his tongue. His lips tenderly skim over my skin as he continues his descent to my inner thighs and on down to my inner knees. Then he moves his mouth up my thigh and the anticipation is driving me senseless. My breathing is hitching as he whispers, "My sweet Ana," against my inner thigh. I gasp as his mouth finally makes contact with me.

"Oh, Christian," I moan. "God, that feels good." I can feel the vibration as he moans against me.

He is teasing me and making me ache for all of him until I am teetering on the edge. "Please, please, don't stop." I try to catch my breath, but it's impossible. He is relentless and I can feel everything tightening. I'm on the verge of my mind shutting off and my body taking over.

Christian teases me over and over until I audibly gasp and willingly give myself over to all of it. I feel Christian give me that final push over the edge as the waves of spasms take me. "Christian," is all I can whisper as I catch my breath and feel my body tense and then descend into a mass of quivering trembling flesh. Christian does not release me until he has teased every spasm out of me. Finally relaxing, I fist his hair as he moves up and I pull his mouth over mine. I can taste us on his lips and in his mouth.

Christian looks down at me searching my face, "God I love to look at you just after you've come. There's the most beautiful flush to your skin. It's like strawberries and cream."

I smile up at him, pulling my legs up around his waist and lifting my hips up to him. "I need you now," I whisper.

"I'm here, baby," he growls. "I'm here." I can feel him partly slide inside. Stopping there he teases me knowing that my body is aching for him.

Cupping his butt with my hands I pull him closer, "Please. Now. Please," I beg.

Christian relents and I can feel all of him slowly, gently fill me until my need for him is sated.

"God, you feel so good," I hear him gasp as he is sheathed to the hilt and he stops, leaving me to digest the feel of him.

I can feel myself quiver around him as I contain him. He is mine. I am consumed with him and by him. I possess him and he possesses me. He props on his elbows and buries his head in my shoulder as he withdraws slowly. I feel his hips roll and the muscles in his butt flex as he stops and then gently slides back inside. I can hear his soft moan as he fills me again, stopping when he can advance no farther. He rests for a moment and then gradually repeats his actions again and again. His mouth finds mine and he takes it as he has taken me…completely.

His heart is beating against my breast and his breathing is quickening as his excitement rises. I can almost feel him getting harder and thicker as he continues to make love to me. His drive intensifies as his arousal increases with each thrust. The friction from his driving stirs my need for him, pushing me closer to my release. Looking into his eyes I can see the primal need there. His need for me and his need to fuck. I can feel my climax building with each thrust. He is pushing me, guiding me closer to the edge that he intends to push me over. My mind has stopped and my body is taking over guided by primal instinct, leaving my sole purpose to experience the pleasure he is giving .

My hips meet his trying to relieve the tension and sate the hunger that I have for him. Each stroke from him rubs that tender aching spot in me causing me to tremble and quiver beneath him. "Christian, I need you," I manage to whisper to him as I look into his eyes.

"Baby, I love you. Are you ready?" he growls.

"Yes. Please, don't stop." I beg in a hoarse whisper. I can feel myself tighten around him as my body readies itself for surrender.

"Come on, baby. I can feel you. You're going to come." He knows my body so well and I can feel the spasms beginning deep inside and spreading to take my entire body. I look deep into his eyes as he watches me fall apart beneath him; my body trembling and tormented with the pleasure of him. I can feel myself tighten and relaxing around him claiming him and all I know is Christian and what he is doing to me, what he is giving me and how he loves me. I've never been more his than at this moment.

"That's my girl. My beautiful sweet girl," he murmurs against my skin as I begin to regain my senses. I search his face as he drives harder and deeper racing for his climax. His breathing is like a thoroughbred rushing for the finish line; labored and harsh his nostrils flaring as he pounds his way to his release. Finally throwing his head back, his passion glazing his gray eyes, I feel a shudder rack his powerful frame as he calls out my name his voice hoarse with agonizing ecstasy. He stills and trembles as his climax consumes him and I know that I have done this to him. He is mine and only mine.

As he relaxes the tortured mask leaves his face and he is once again my beautiful Christian. My copper haired, gray eyed beautiful Christian. Falling on me, he nuzzles his face into my perspiration soaked hair and I wrap him in my arms clutching him to me. I can feel the pounding in his chest that matches mine and we lie entwined as our breathing returns to normal.

Running my fingers through his hair I can feel the perspiration soaked roots. "Christian, when we make love I forget that we've been married almost 8 years. I forget that we have two children in the next room. It's like when we met. It's just you and me and the rest of the world disappears," I whisper in his ear.

Lifting his head and looking down into my eyes he whispers, "I know. Every time with you is like the first time. You're my sweet innocent girl. You're mine. Only mine." He brushes the hair from my face. " The only thing that has changed is that I love you so much more. More than I ever imagined I could."

He softly kisses me brushing across my lips with his. Finally rolling off and he lies beside me cradling me in his arms. Never have two people ever belonged to one another more than Christian and I belong to each other. Never.


	6. Chapter 6

**Fifty Shades…Full Circle**

**Chapter 6**

"Hi Christian."

"Hey, Baby. I can't talk long . Got a meeting in a couple of minutes. Just wanted to let you know I won't make dinner tonight," he lets me know.

"Ohhh. I'm sorry. That's every night this week so far," I remind him.

"I know. I can't be helped."

"When will you be home?" I ask him.

"I'm not sure. As soon as I can get away. I've got to run. I've got people waiting on me."

"Okay. I miss you."

"Miss you too, baby. Kiss the kids for me."

"I will. Be careful."

"See you later."

I hate when he works so late every night. Not only do I miss him, I worry when he works so hard. All this money won't keep him from dying young from stress.

"Gail, Mr. Grey won't be home for dinner. Can you save him a plate?" I ask her entering the kitchen.

"That's every night this week. He's working awfully hard lately," she has a frown on her face.

"I know. I don't like it, but he doesn't listen to me."

"Maybe it's a good thing that you are going away this weekend. Get him away from the office." She gives me a smile.

"I hope so. Even though it basically is a business trip, we haven't been away without the kids since our anniversary last year. And that reminds me that we have one coming up again shortly. I need to come up with something for him."

"It must be hard thinking of gifts for him. I mean he has everything a man could want."

"I know. If he wants something he just buys it. It doesn't really leave me many options," I smirk. "I'll think of something. I've got a few weeks."

Sawyer walks through the door with Teddy at his side. "Ms. Grey. Theodore is home from school." He's always so damn formal.

"Thanks. Luke." I smile at him. I give Teddy a bug hug," Hey bear. How was your day?"

"Oh, I guess it was okay. I'm getting' real tired of school," he's pouting.

"Well, you only have a couple of more weeks before you're out for the summer." I run my fingers through his hair and rub his back. "Surely you can make it a couple of more weeks."

"I guess. When's dad getting home?" he asks me.

"Baby, daddy called and he is going to be late again. I'm not sure when he'll be home."

"Shoot. I haven't gotten to see him hardly since last weekend," he pouts.

"I know. I guess he has something really important that he needs to take care of. He doesn't like not seeing us either."  
"Can I stay up 'till he gets home, so I can see him?" he asks.

"Probably not. Hopefully he'll be home before you have to go to bed. You have school tomorrow so you need to get your rest."

"Damn!" He looks up at me and I give him a warning look. "Well, dad says worse."

"Teddy, your father says much worse, but I'm your mother and I'd really like it if you wouldn't talk like your father does, please. When you get to be an adult you can decide how you want to talk, but until then, please watch it. Okay?"

"Yes, ma'am."

"That's my good boy." I give him a big hug and kiss his cheek. I'm shocked when Teddy slightly pulls away and rubs his cheek where I kissed him.

"Aw Mom," he groans.

"Aw, mom, what?" I ask him.

"Dad said I'm getting to be a big boy. He said I'm not a baby anymore. "

"Well you aren't too big for me to kiss you and give you a hug. You never will be, understand?" I tell him.

"Yes, ma'am."

The father of my children finally comes through the door followed by Jason Taylor. Christian is still tapping on his phone and looks worn out.

Gail gives Jason a big hug and tells him that his dinner is waiting for him in their quarters.

"Gail you and Jason go on and relax. I'll get the kids down and see you in the morning," I tell Gail.

"Okay. Thanks Ana. We'll see you in the morning." Gail and Taylor disappear as they head for home.

I give Christian a big hug and a kiss. "Hi baby. You look absolutely worn out."

"That good, huh?" he smirks. "It's been a really long day."

"Sit down and I'll get your dinner warmed up. Would you rather have a drink first and unwind before diner?" I ask.

"I think I'll opt for the drink a few minutes to sit down. Got any wine chilled?" he asks.

"Always. What do you want? Red or white?"

"Anything will do as long as it's white," he gives me a big grin.

"Pouilly okay?"

"Sure."

I pour him a nice cool glass of Pouilly-Fumé and walk with him into the family room and he flops down on the sofa. He loosens his tie and unbuttons his top shirt button as he takes a few sips of his wine. Teddy runs over and flings himself on his dad.

"I haven't seen you in forever Dad," he complains.

Grace runs over and tries to see her dad, but Teddy got there first, so I pick her up and make her wait until Teddy has gotten some attention. She isn't happy about it but I try to quietly explain that she needs to let Teddy say hi to his dad then she can go sit on his lap. Finally she breaks free and crawls over to see her dad. She crawls up in his lap and takes her little hands putting one on each of his cheeks and gives him a big kiss. I think Christian will melt as he gives her a big hug and kiss. "How's my girl?" He asks her.

"Good Daddy," she gives him a big girly grin.

"Hey. I thought I was your girl," I whine.

He puts his arm around me. "You are my girl. You're both my girls. My little girl and my big girl. Very different distinctions," he grins and gives me a kiss.

"Must be nice to be so loved," I tease him.

"Yeah." He nods. "Yeah, it is. There was a time I never even believed I could have all of this. Now look at me. A wife, a son and a daughter. An actual home instead of some cold apartment in the city."

"Your awfully pensive this evening. Is anything wrong?" I ask.

"Nope. Just tired and glad to be home," he gives me a quick kiss and downs his wine.

"Another glass?" I ask.

"I'll wait and have another one with dinner. And how was your day, Mrs. Grey?"

"It was just like yesterday. Kids, house, phone calls. They all run together after a while." I sigh.

"How was your day?" I ask him.

"Long and busy. Very long and busy." He runs his hand through his hair and leans his head back and lets out a huge sigh.

"Christian, is everything alright?" I ask again.

"Yeah. I guess. There's just a lot going on. I was out so much there for a while, that things sort of slid. I 'm just trying to get everything back up to par. It'll pass."

"You'd tell me if anything was going on wouldn't you?" I ask .

Looking over he gives me a big grin, "Possibly."

"I'll go get your dinner warmed up. You talk to the kids."

Christian is fed and kids are finally in bed after finding out that Teddy had homework he had forgotten. That bought him an extra thirty minutes to get that done.

By the time I get upstairs, Christian is already showered and sitting in bed staring at his laptop.

I get through my shower and slip into my gown. Crawling up on the bed next to him I snuggle up beside him and look over at the computer screen. It's all grids and numbers and account numbers. "What's all that?" I ask.

"Huh? Oh, it's just a bunch of numbers."

"Gee thanks. I had already figured that out." I tell him. "What are the numbers for?"

"They are just account balances…money in…money out. That sort of thing." Still brushing me off.

"But what account is it? What company?" I insist.

Christian closes the laptop and puts it aside. He turns over to me and puts his arms around my waist, nuzzling my belly. "If you're going to bother me, I'd rather you bother me like this."

"I was just interested, that's all."

He sits up and cups my head taking my mouth with his and parting my lips with his expert tongue. "Mmm. That's good." He softly kisses my breast through the silk fabric of my gown on his way to laying his head down in my lap.

I run my hand through his hair. "Sweet heart?"

"Hmm?" he answers.

"I'm really worried about you." I tell him still rubbing his head with my hands.

"Why?" I can see his eyelids getting heavy.

"You just work so hard. I worry that you're getting too stressed. You aren't getting any sleep and you aren't eating right…Sweetheart?...Baby?...Christian?" I hear him let out a tiny snort and look down and he is sound asleep in my lap. I get the lights turned out and slide down into bed and Christian moves over and drapes himself over me; his head resting on my belly and his arms around my waist. I am a pillow once again.

Turning over I notice Christian isn't draped across me. In fact, he isn't in the bed at all. The clock reads 1:15 a.m., the bathroom light isn't on and I have no idea where can be. I slip out of bed and I head out to the hall. Still no Christian. Maybe he went down to get a snack or something to drink, so I walk down the hall and down the stairs. The house is still dark, but I see a snippet of light down the hall. I walk toward it and it is coming from Christian's office. Walking to the doorway I peer in and he is at his laptop. The only light is coming from his laptop screen and a small desk lamp. I stop in the doorway and fold my arms leaning against the door frame and just watch him typing away on the keyboard. He is in his pajama bottoms and no shirt. The light from the computer screen reflects off of his chiseled chest and I can see his muscles flex as he pounds on the keyboard.

My gosh he's wearing glasses. When did that happen? Why is he wearing glasses and I don't know anything about it? After several minutes he finally looks up and sees me in the doorway.

"Sweetheart. What are you doing up?" he asks.

"You were gone and I came looking for you." I walk over toward his desk and walk around sliding my hand over his bare back. He puts his arms around my waist and I hug him and kiss his head.

"Christian when did you start wearing glasses?" I ask him.

"What? These?" he pulls them off.

"Yes those."

"They are just computer glasses. I picked them up earlier this week," he confesses.

" Why didn't you tell me you needed glasses?" I ask him.

"Baby. I don't need glasses. They are just for the computer so my eyes don't get so tired."

"Okay. You look kind of sexy with them on."

Christian pats his hand on his thigh and pulls me down, "Come here. I haven't been paying enough attention to you have I?" he asks.

"Christian I'm fine. I just worry about you. Is something going on at work?"

"Not really. I just have a company that is not doing well. In fact I can't seem to get it turned around. I'm trying to develop a plan to get the money hemorrhaging stopped before we leave this weekend. I just wanted us to have a good time and not have this on my mind," he tells me.

"You've not ever had one that you couldn't fix before. What are you going to do?" I ask.

"I know. It's a small company, very small. All I know to do is dismantle it , but then that puts several hundred people out of work. I've been carrying it a while. Not only is it not making money, it is sucking it from the rest of the company. I just don't know what else to do. I've been looking at selling it, but I hate doing that to the employees."

"Can't you move them to other companies?" I ask.

"Management can be moved, but the workers aren't going to uproot their families and move for a lower level job. They'll just be out in the cold." He rubs his hand over his eyes and I can tell he's tired.

"I'm sorry, baby. Is there anything I can do?" I ask.

"Not unless you want to go down there and personally run it." he tells me.

"I'm afraid it would suck money even worse if I did that."

"Come here." He pulls me over his legs to straddle them, and circles my waist with his arms. He buries his nose in my hair and I can hear him inhale. "Damn you smell good."

He nuzzles my breasts and I pull his head close with my arms.

"Mmm. This is what I need," he murmurs. He looks up at me and I fist his hair as he takes my mouth and devours it almost taking my breath away. I can feel him reach behind me and close his laptop as he stands up and sets me on the edge of his desk still kissing me. I feel the warmth of his hands as he slides them up my thighs underneath the silk of my gown. Then ever so lightly, I feel his finger slide between my thighs to test the waters. I gasp and quiver with the light stroke.

Christian stands up and eases me back onto his desk, his lips never leaving mine. His weight presses against me as he folds himself over me. His hands slide my gown up to my waist and he drops his pajama bottoms. Again I feel his finger slide between my thighs. " Christian. What are we doing?" I ask. "What if one of the kids gets up?"

"They won't. Shhh." He whispers against my lips.

Then I feel the ecstasy as he fills me slowly and gently. "Ahh. God. I needed you," he growls. He braces on his elbows hovering over me as he begins to fuck me, slowly and deliberately. My feet are resting on the arms of his leather desk chair and my hair is spilling over the edge of his desk. God this is delicious. Meeting his rhythm with my hips I feel my arousal growing. My breathing is hitching along with his as he begins to thrust with more determination, pushing both of us closer to the edge.

"Oh, god, baby." I whisper, trying not to speak too loudly.

"I know, baby. I know. It's so good," he murmurs.

I can feel myself quiver each time he rubs that tender spot inside of me and he is positioned so that he hits the mark with each thrust. Christian keeps up his rhythm pushing me closer and closer to my promised orgasm. My breathing is racing as I begin to feel the delicious pulling in my groin.

"That's it, baby. You're almost there. Look at me." he whispers.

My belly begins to tremble and my breathing catches as my body begins to relax and accept the orgasm that is beginning. "There you go. That's my girl." He whispers to me.

I finally begin to fall as the spasms spread through my body, centering around him, pulling and releasing him. "Open your eyes. I want to watch you," he compels me.

I open my eyes and look into his as I give myself to him. I have such a need for him and he is sating that need . After an eternity, I finally begin to relax and breathe again. Christian brushes my wet hair from my face and kisses me, then he bows his head and begins to thrust full force driving himself to his orgasm with determination. His breathing becomes ragged and I can see him relax just before he is taken by the result of his desire. "Fuck. Fuck, Fuck." he hisses through his clinched teeth. His body tenses and the veins bulge in his neck as the look of tortured pleasure masks his face. He trembles and jerks as his orgasm racks his beautiful body. I watch him unravel above me and I fall in love with him all over again. Finally he relaxes and is able to catch his breath. "God, Ana, I love you." he whispers against my neck as he collapses on me.

"I just came down to find you." I gasp trying to slow my breathing.

"You found me."

Christian eases out and sits back in his chair. "Wait just a minute," he tells me. He pulls several tissues from the box on his desk and gently wipes me, then helps me to a sitting position. He tosses the tissues in the trash can then stands and pulls his pajama bottoms up. Putting his arms around my waist he helps me to my feet. "Lets go to bed." He smiles and kisses my head. Turning out the light, he puts his arm around me and I put mine around him and we head upstairs to go to bed…again.

Once upstairs, we go into the bathroom to wash up. "Teddy said _damn_ today." I tell him.

I can see a big grin spread across his face, "He did?"

"Yes. And when I corrected him, he said that you said worse."

"That's my boy," he chuckles.

"Christian! It's not funny. What if he says something like that in public…or at school or in front of your mother?" I ask him.

He kisses my head, "Oh, baby. No one is going to die from him saying _damn._ "

"No, but he is way too young to be talking like that. You need to be more careful. Please." I implore him.

"Okay, okay. I promise to watch it," he tells me. He is still chuckling under his breath. "I'm sleepy now. Let's please go to bed."

Hitting the bed we snuggle under the covers and hold each other close.

"I can't believe we just did it on your desk." I whisper to him.

"Why?"

"Because we could have gotten caught."

"It's our house. I guess I can fuck you anywhere we choose," he whispers against my hair.

"I know. It just seemed so wrong for some reason." I tell him.

"You think that was wrong? You just wait until I get you to Houston. I'll show you wrong," he laughs.

"Christian? May I ask you a question?"

"Ask."

"This may sound stupid, but…how do you know when I'm going to come?"

"What?" he looks down at me and grins.

"You always tell me when I'm, going to….to come. How do you do that?" I ask a little embarrassed.

Christian laughs out loud.

"What?" I sit up and ask.

"You mean you don't know?" he asks.

"If I knew I wouldn't ask. How do you know?"

"Baby, just before you start to come, you wiggle your toes," he grins over at me still laughing.

"I do not." I tell him.

"Oh, yes. You do," he grins.

"Really?" I ask.

He kisses me and strokes my cheek. "Yes, baby really. You wiggle your toes." He is still laughing. "Did you think I had some sort of sexual ESP or something?" he chuckles.

"Well. I wondered. I never noticed that. Really?" I'm amazed.

"Uh huh. Really." He grabs me and kisses my neck. "Anastasia," still laughing, " you never cease to amaze me. We've been married for almost eight years and you just now ask me how I know when you're going to come. God I do love you, baby."

"I wiggle my toes. I just never knew."

**A/N: I know this was short, but next chapter is Houston and a lot happens in the Lone Star State. Yeee Haaa! See you in Texas.**


	7. Chapter 7

_**Fifty Shades…Full Circle**_

**Chapter 7**

Christian and I are all packed and Taylor has the luggage in the car. I've so been looking forward to this weekend. Christian and me ….and Taylor. Just like the good old days.

"Good bye, son," Christian gives Teddy a big hug and a kiss. "You be a good boy for Gail and take care of things."

"I will. Bring me a cowboy hat, daddy," he asks.

"I'll see what I can do," Christian tells him.

I give him a kiss, "Be a sweet boy for me."

"I'll try."

Grace has her arms locked around Christian and doesn't appear to be letting go. "You be a good girl," Christian whispers to her as he peels her arms from around his neck and kisses her cheek. I give her a kiss and tell her good-bye.

"Gail, I'm sorry we're taking Taylor," I apologize to her.

"Don't worry. We'll be fine," she assures me.

Taylor opens the door to the SUV and I slide in and Christian is right behind me. Taylor starts the car and we are off for our weekend.

Christian reaches over and takes my hand and gives me a relaxed smile. "Did you get all your work done?" I ask.

"As much as it can be for now." He puts my hand to his lips and gives it a soft kiss and a squeeze. "Let's have a good weekend."

"I can't wait to see this plane. What does it look like?" I ask him.

"Well, it's long and cylindrical and there is a wing on each side and a tail in the back," Christian flashes me a big grin.

"I don't know why I even bother to ask you anything," I shake my head.

"Baby, it's a plane. You'll see it here in a few minutes," he assures me.

We pull up to the hanger where our old plane used to be at Sea-Tac and I gasp, "Is that it?" I ask him.

"Yep," he's got a huge grin on his face.

"Christian it's a damn airliner. What are we going to do with that?" I am still stunned.

Taylor finally stops and begins to unload the luggage. Stephen and the pilot from the agency greet us as we board the plane.

"Stephen introduces us. Mrs. Grey, Mr. Grey, this is Robert; he is the pilot from the agency. He flew the plane out this morning."

"Mrs. Grey, Mr. Grey. It's a pleasure." Robert extends his hand and Christian gives it a good firm shake.

"Robert. How was the trip out?" he asks.

"Excellent . Good weather all the way. It should stay that way for the return trip to Huston, sir."

We are introduced to the flight attendant, Isla, a tall, beautiful blond with a warm smile. She takes us to the seating area. On the way we pass a fully equipped galley.

"Christian this is huge. Do we need all of this?" I ask. "The other plane wasn't this big."

"When I bought the other one, I was a bachelor. I took my family places occasionally, but it was usually just me… and Taylor. I have a family now. We have two kids."

"But they're small kids. They don't need all this room."

"I know. But what if we want to take everyone on a trip? Or if I need to take people with me on a business trip?" he tries to convince me. "Just relax and enjoy the trip. Don't worry about it."

"Okay. It's absolutely beautiful. All the burled wood and white leather." I am really in awe.

"Let's walk to the back," he tells me. We pass through the lounge area and then the passenger seating. There is a partition separating the bedrooms, yes with an, 's', from the rest of the cabin. One has a queen size bed that converts to two twin beds with attached bath on one side of the fuselage . Then we pass by the bathroom with a small shower. It's all granite and dark wood. Finally in the very back is the master suite. There is a queen bed and an adjoining bathroom with shower. As well as a seating area with a sofa and a wet bar. To top it off, there is a flat screen TV in a wood cabinet that rises and retracts into the cabinet with a remote.

"Christian this is unbelievable," I am still amazed.

"Well, if I buy it, we'll have the interior redone," he assures me.

"But why? It's beautiful." I ask.

"Because I want it redone. It's sort of like sleeping on a used mattress. I want it new and to my specifications," he tells me. "Come on let's get to our seats so we can get ready to taxi."

"Christian and I sit in our seats and buckle up. Isla asks us if we would like a glass of champagne and we accept, of course. To my surprise it is Bollinger and it is delicious.

"Christian, how did they know our favorite champagne?" I ask him.

"When someone is about to spend this much money with you, you make an effort to find out what they like and make sure they get it."

Isla brings a tray of hot hors d'oeuvres and they are delicious. It's a little early for hors d'oeuvres, but we eat then anyway. Taylor is ensconced in a seat in the back. He declines the champagne, naturally, opting for coffee, but he does down a few of the tasty hors d'oeuvres.

Does it get any better than this? I don't see how it could. Unless we were on our way to the French Riviera, again.

"How long will it take us to get to Houston?" I ask him.

"About, three and a half to four hours, depending on the tail winds," he tells me.

"Christian. How much does this plane cost?" I ask.

"Why do you always want to know what things cost?" he wants to know. "We can afford whatever we want. Price doesn't matter. Am I ever going to convince you of that?"

"I guess I just grew up differently than you. We never had any excess money. I just learned to be conscious of what things cost," I try to explain. " I don't know that I'll ever get out of the habit of looking at price tags. And I want our kids to do the same thing. I don't want them taking money for granted. They need to understand that things aren't just given to you, that you need to work for what you get."

"Why? We can give our kids anything they want."

"You had to work for what you have. It wasn't a gift. I had to work the entire time I was in college to get through. Nothing was given to me either. I don't want them to be spoiled." I try to explain.

"But that's why I worked. So I could provide for my family; give them whatever they wanted."

"Christian, when you started your company, you had no idea that you would ever have a family. You were already a billionaire when I met you. You made that money for you," I scold him.

"Well, I knew I'd need it for something good someday," he shrugs. "I was thinking more like planes, cars and girls at the time, but it all worked out," he gives me a toothy grin.

"How much can girls cost?" I ask him and frown.

"Oh, they can be quite expensive sometimes," he cocks his head and gives me a look.

"I guess so, if you buy them cars and clothes and supplement their bank accounts." I give him a big smirk.

"Well, luckily I found THE girl and could stop looking. I like it a lot better this way," he squeezes my hand.

"I'm glad I was the right girl, because you sure were the right guy."

"Okay, enough champagne , Mrs. Grey." He takes my glass and gives me a sweet kiss.

After a beautiful trip we finally land in Houston. The plane taxis down to the building of the agency handling the sale. We disembark and are greeted by the broker in charge of the sale.

"Mrs. Grey, Mr. Grey, I'm Jeff Lindley, welcome to Houston." He is an attractive young man. Tall, blonde hair, blue eyes, very well built. He is dressed casually as are we. Christian and I shake his hand. "I hope you had a pleasant flight."

"Yes. Quite pleasant," Christian assures him.

"And the flight crew? Did you get everything you needed?" he asks.

"Yes. Yes, everything was satisfactory," Christian tells him. Satisfactory, hell it was spectacular in my opinion.

"Well. Would you like to go to your hotel and settle in?" he asks.

"Yes. That would be preferable," Christian tells him.

"Very good. We have your car right here and your driver is Joseph. He will make sure you get to the hotel safely. Your reservations are confirmed and there is no need to check in, we've taken care of all that for you. We have you at the Hotel Za Za in the Tycoon Suite. I'm sure you'll find it more than satisfactory. We have dinner reservations for eight p.m. Joseph will return to pick you up at seven-thirty. Jackets required of course."

"Thank you." Christian says.

"Very good, Mrs. Grey, Mr. Grey. Please don't hesitate to contact me if anything is not to your liking. Until eight p.m. then."

Christian and I slide into the limousine and Taylor gets up front with the driver.

"Hotel Za Za?" I ask. "What is a Hotel Za Za?"

"Sounds trendy. That's code for expensive," he says.

We arrive at the hotel and it looks innocuous enough from the outside. Walking inside I understand what Christian meant by trendy. Different would be a good description, but very elegant. The hotel is on the museum district and it fits in. We make our way up to the Tycoon suite and I about choke when we walk inside. It looks like the red room only elegant and without the instruments of torture. It is so different, so….so…. trendy.

"Christian. Look at this place. And look at that view!" Walking out on the balcony, there is a total view of downtown Houston highlighted by the sunset in the background. As I turn to leave I notice a bath tub on the balcony. Not a Jacuzzi. A bathtub with running water! My god who came up with this concept? Everything is overdone, but so different and so elegant.

I notice the pictures on the wall and point them out to Christian. They are of "Tycoons", thus the name Tycoon Suite. There is Richard Branson, Bill Gates, Oprah Winfrey, that Buffet guy, Warren. Warren Buffet. "Christian. Your picture isn't up there."

"I'd better never fucking catch it up there either," he scoffs.

"Do you like it?" I ask him.

"Well, it's certainly interesting. I does have a sexy feel to it…sort of dark and ….sensual. I think we can put it to good use," he nods as he fidgets with his wedding band and surveys the room.

Walking into the bedroom, the walls are dark and the bed is overstuffed and half covered in pillows. The colors are gray and yellow and brown. The headboard of the bed is made of a huge baroque mirror that is almost the size of the bed. That's a bit kinky. The bathroom has a huge walk in shower with a large tub in the same enclosure and a sculptured toilet as well as a bidet.

There are several concept suites here but the Tycoon is The Suite. This place was tailor made for us. The porter leaves us and Christian wraps his arms around me from the back. He kisses my neck. "I can see you naked, spread eagle and tied to every surface in this place, Mrs. Grey." He whispers against my neck.

I giggle. "It is pretty fucking neat, isn't it?" I turn to him and kiss him. "Maybe we'd better eat a light dinner."

I get our things unpacked and put away while Christian, taps away on his phone. I'm waiting for the laptop to appear at any moment. The cooler has been stocked with several bottles of Bollinger and Christian has opened one and poured us a glass. I walk in and flop on the sumptuous sofa next to him and put my head on his shoulder. "I laid out your suit for you."

"Thanks baby," he's still on that phone.

"I thought you took care of everything before you left?" I ask him playing with his hair and twirling it with my fingers.

"I did. Just a few loose ends. That's all," he tosses his phone on the coffee table and pulls me to him taking my mouth with his. I can feel his weight on me as he pushes me back on the sofa. "I'm not paying enough attention to you, am I?" he murmurs.

I giggle and squirm as he kisses my neck. "Don't worry; I'll see that you do."

"We don't have time for anything elaborate. You want to do it right quick?" he grins down at me.

I nod eagerly, "Yes, please."

Christian gets up and balances on his knees as he pulls his shirt off over his head revealing his incredible body. I wiggle out of my jeans as he undoes his zipper and yanks his jeans and boxers off. Before I can get my top off he is on me, kissing me and engulfing my mouth with his. He grabs my shirt and pulls it over my head and yanks my bra up freeing my breasts. Before I can catch up to him, he has picked me up and folded me over the arm of the sofa on my belly. Without any hesitation I feel the sensation of him filling me. Before I can adjust he withdraws and then enters again. He places his hands on my hips and pulls me to him, jerking me back to meet him. This is so fast and so wild; it is such a turn on that I feel my arousal building quickly.

We are synchronized with our primal need to fuck and I can feel my breathing become ragged as my body is racked with desire, with need.

Christian's breathing is becoming coarse as he continues to feed his need to fuck. "Are you ready?" he asks.

"Almost. Just don't stop." I beg.

"Don't worry. I'm going to fuck you until you come," he growls.

I can feel my belly beginning to quiver and with one final soft stroke, I am gone. My body has taken over and I have lost control. "Ah, ah, ah. Christian!" I pant as I accept the carnal seizure that has swept my body. I tense and begin to tremble against the soft overstuffed arm of the sofa; quivering and shuddering beneath him. Finally the spasms wane and I collapse like a rag doll. Christian grabs my hips and I am helpless to assist him as he controls the final act and I can only become a bystander. Finally I feel him tremble. "Oh! God! Fuck!" he hisses and I know his orgasm has taken him. In a moment he collapses over on me and I feel his heart beating out of his chest against my back as his breathing begins to slow. The warmth of his breath settles on my skin as he softly kisses my shoulders.

"I really like this room," he whispers. He is finally able to stand and he withdraws from me. Putting his arms around my waist he pulls me to my feet and turns me to face him. I am almost senseless. He brushes my wet hair from my face and sweetly kisses me. "I guess we should get a shower and get dressed," he tells me still trying to catch his breath.

I nod in agreement and we head to the bathroom and get cleaned up for dinner. Really all I want is a nap.

We get the call that Joseph is waiting for us, so we make our way to the elevator for the trip down to the lobby. The electricity always sparks in an elevator for us. "Calm down Mrs. Grey. We'll have plenty of time after dinner," he winks at me. Joseph is waiting with the limo and he opens the door for us as we slide in. He pulls away and we begin our trip to the restaurant.

"You'll be dining at the Capital Grille with Mr. Lindley and his guest," Joseph explains.

"Hmm. Wonder who his guest is?" I ask Christian.

"Probably the flavor of the month," he tells me.

"What?"

"Whoever he's fucking at the moment," he explains.

"Oh. I see."

We arrive at the restaurant and Jeff and his date are waiting for us.

Jeff extends his hand, "Mrs. Grey, Mr. Grey, I'd like you to meet my girlfriend, Lisa Padgett. Lisa this is Mr. and Mrs. Christian Grey."

"Hello. Nice to meet you both," she greets us with a warm smile. She is very pretty. Not too tall about 5'6". Very good figure, breasts have probably had a little help from her surgeon. Her blonde hair is….big. What is it they say? The bigger the hair, the closer to god? She is dripping in gold jewelry and a very tight designer dress and stilettos. A little on the fake side, but she seems very nice. She matches Jeff.

At the table Christian and Jeff talk planes and business. Jeff seems to be trying to pick Christian's brain for business tips. Christian isn't giving away any free information.

Christian orders the Porcini Rubbed Delmonico with 12-year aged Balsamic, Lobster Mac and Cheese and Grilled Asparagus. I have the Seared Tenderloin with Butter Poached Lobster Tails, Au Gratin Potatoes and Fresh Green Beans with Shallots and Heirloom Tomatoes. Jeff orders the Cold Shellfish Platter for the table as an appetizer. We finish off with Crème Brûlée and Fresh Strawberries Capital Grille. Jeff leaves the wine choices up to Christian, a decision he may regret, since Christian orders exactly what he wants, price is not a concern. If Jeff isn't careful, Christian will eat through most of his commission.

After we finish Lisa and I excuse ourselves to the ladies' room. She is actually a pleasant girl, not much younger than I am. We wash our hands and freshen our make-up. "Mrs. Grey," she starts.

"Please stop that and call me Ana," I tell her.

"Ana. Without being too forward, how in the world did you meet Mr. Grey?" she asks.

"I interviewed him for the college paper and one thing led to another. Here we are eight years and 2 no 3 children later."

"Three?" she queries.

"We recently lost a child," I tell her.

"Oh, I'm so sorry," she has a pained look on her face.

"It's still pretty fresh; only a couple of months ago, but we are making it." I give her a sympathetic smile.

"Mr. Grey is just so,…. so,….. well excuse me, but so damn handsome and rich. How in the world did you get him to commit? I've been dating Jeff for over four years and I can't seem to tie him down."

"Maybe that's the problem. No one want's to be tied down," I tell her. "Mr. Grey and I only knew each other for a couple of months before we married. It was just one of those things. We knew from the start that we were meant for each other. There was never a question that we wouldn't end up together. Well maybe once in the beginning. We had a silly misunderstanding, but we worked it out."

"Really? How did you know?" she asks.

"From the moment we met, we never wanted to be with anyone else." I turn to her. "Look. Just be yourself. Don't try to be anyone you're not just because you think that's what he wants. Allow yourself to love him without reservation and accept him for who he is. He will probably fall on occasion, but if you want to stay with him, forgive him and never throw it back in his face. But, stand up for yourself. Just because you love him doesn't mean you have to let him run all over you. And it never hurts to fuck like rabbits. Let yourselves enjoy each other. You've got to have fun and joy in your lives."

"That sound like good advice, " she nods.

"So far, it's worked for us." I tell her. "Let's get back out to them."

I can tell Christian is getting tired and frankly so am I. We have a big day tomorrow and should probably get some rest. Besides I have plans for Mr. Grey. He looks so tired; they may have to wait until tomorrow.

We part company and I thank Jeff for a lovely evening. Christian doesn't. He expected it and would have been pissed if he hadn't had a lovely evening.

Arriving back to the hotel we are back in our unusual room. "Well, that was an interesting evening," I tell him.

"Really? What about it was so interesting?" he asks as he shrugs out of his jacket and unbuttons his shirt.

"It seems that Lisa and Jeff have been dating for four years and she can't get him hogtied and to the alter. She asked me how I was able to land someone so handsome and rich."

"She should have asked me how I was able to land someone so beautiful and stubborn," he grins at me as he walks over and unzips my dress for me.

"I told her it was mutual. I told her to stop trying to land him and just love and accept him."

"Baby if they've been dating four years and he hasn't proposed yet, she might as well move on," he tells me as he slides my dress down and it pools on the floor.

"Oh, Christian, how do you know? You never dated anyone four years. It may just be taking him a while. They're young." I admonish him as I take off my earrings.

I can feel his hand glide across my skin softly skimming my belly as he nips at my ear. Leaning back against him his hands unhook my bra and it drops from my shoulders then he cups my breasts with his hands, softly kneading them from behind.

He moves my hair out of the way and kisses my neck. I give him a soft moan and lean my head over giving him better access. His breath is warm and moist against my skin as I put my hands over his and he tweaks and pulls my nipples. "I also told her to fuck like rabbits."

"Mmmm. Sounds like good advice he whispers in my ear." His hand skims my abdomen and slides beneath the satin of my scant panties. I gasp as I feel him. He holds me tight with his other arm and caresses me again and again until I am quivering with each sensual contact. Writhing against him I feel him grow against my back. He continues to stroke me and kiss my neck until my legs begin to give way beneath me. He is holding me around my waist with his other arm keeping me pressed against him.

"Do you want to go out on the balcony and get in the tub?" he whispers.

"No," is all I can gasp. "Not on the balcony." I'm panting trying to catch my breath. "Please. Oh, God, please." I whisper.

"Please what?" he asks against my ear.

"Don't stop. Please don't stop," I beg him.

"I have no intention of stopping, baby," I hear softly against my neck.

It's all I can do to keep my feet on the floor as he circles and rubs and is driving me to the brink. "I can feel you quiver every time I touch you," he whispers.

"Yes. Yes." I breathe. My body is tingling and my skin is on fire. I writhe against him with each stroke and grind against him. I am his captive as he holds me tight against him. I can't escape the delicious torture his fingers are inflicting on me and I don't want to.

"Fuck you're quivering. It's almost time for those toes to wiggle." I can feel him smile against my neck. My breathing is ragged and I am so close I am almost insane with desire. My body is aching, begging to reach its climax. I want to cry I'm so close to exploding against him.

"That's my good girl. Just let yourself go, baby."

"Oh, Christian!" I almost scream out as my mind becomes a blank and my world centers itself on his fingers. I can feel the intense pulling in my legs that makes its way to my groin and I begin to realize the clenching and releasing that he has forced on me. I can't speak as my body convulses against him. Shuddering and shaking, I finally go limp in his arms. "Shit!" is all I can say.

He removes his fingers and pulls me up and turns me to face him. He quickly seals his mouth to mine and greedily consumes it. "God you taste good," he whispers against my sensitive lips.

"Christian. I want you. Please." I beg him.

"I know baby," he whispers. "I'm going to give you what you need."

Christian moves me toward the bed and pushing me back on it he follows me and hovers over me. He grabs the waistband of my satin thong with both hands and shreds it pulling the tiny bit of lace and satin from my body. I lean up and unbuckle his belt and unzip his slacks. As he springs free I yank them from his hips forcing them down his legs. He is near my face and I take him in my hands and then sheath him with my mouth. "Oh, shit." He gasps as he trembles and leans forward. I watch him as he shudders and gasps. "Baby. Baby wait," he gasps. Then he fists his hands in my hair. "Oh, my God. Don't stop. My God." I can see him unravel above me as I continue to torture him. "Ana. Ana. You're gonna' make me come, baby… Oh, fuck I don't care. " He growls. I continue to glide him in and out until I hear his tortured gasp. "Fucking, shit!" he hisses. I can feel him tense and shudder over me as the warm liquid leaves his body. "My god, baby. I wasn't expecting that." He whispers as he falls to the bed beside me. I roll over and he takes me in his arms as his heart beats out of his chest and his breathing begins to return.

"I like Houston, so far." I tell him.

"Me too," he grins.

After showering we are snuggled down in the downy bed. I think we are both worn out with the flight, sex, dinner, more sex. I love the feel of the satin sheets and Christian enveloping me. It doesn't take long for us to fall asleep.

* * *

Dawn breaks over Houston and Christian is already up and on his laptop. I can hear him tapping away in the other room.

"Christian! Christian Grey!" I yell into him.

He appears in the doorway. "Yes?" he asks. "Did you need something?"

"What are you doing on that darned computer again?" I ask really perturbed.

" I was working out some specs on the plane if you must know," he answers.

"I wanted to wake up with you and you weren't here," I pout.

He throws himself on the bed and crawls up next to me, "Well, I'm here now. Pretend you're just waking up," he grins.

He leans over me and kisses my neck and I relax under him. "That's much better," I tell him.

"You are getting demanding. Most men wouldn't be able to keep up with you. You're lucky you married me," he smiles.

"No. You're lucky you married me. Most women couldn't keep up with you."

"Well, I guess we're lucky we found each other or we both would be very disappointed with marriage," he buries his head in my neck.

Without saying a word he parts my legs with his knee and as I lift my hips he slides in for our good morning sex. It's not real fancy this early. Christian buries his head in my neck and thrusts away until we both are wasted and satisfied. Breakfast of champions!

Christian and I kiss each other and roll around in the soft bed until there is a knock on the door. He quickly gets up and throws a robe on as he answers the door. It is breakfast. He has ordered coffee and tea with eggs Benedict for me and an omelet and O'Brien potatoes for himself, toast and cut fruit. I throw on my robe and splash water on my face then meet him at the table to have our morning meal.

"Thanks baby. This looks good," I tell him.

"Mmm. It is good. I'm hungry," he gets out between bites. "They're going to pick us up about 9 to go out to the agency and start this plane buying business."

"Okay. I'm not sure what I can do," I tell him.

"You don't have to do anything. Just sit there and look cute," he winks at me.

"I think I can do that."

"We just need to work out the refurbishing and then negotiate price. It shouldn't take too long. Then we are free to enjoy ourselves."

"So you don't really need me?" I ask.

"Yes. I really need you. Don't you want input on the remodeling?" he asks.

"I didn't know I was allowed input," I tell him.

"Of course you are. I need your approval."

"Well, if you need my approval, I'll certainly be there," I say sarcastically.

We finish up breakfast and dress. We have time for one more cup of coffee before Joseph calls for us.

Once at the agency, Christian , Jeff and Stephen walk out to the plane and get immediately into the specifics of the plane. Stephen is there giving his opinion on plane things. Hell. I don't know anything about planes.

I decide to sit in the office and wait until they have finished this part of the transaction. I grab a magazine and settle into a comfy chair.

"Ana." I hear my name. I look up and don't see anyone I know. "Ana Grey!" I look up again and see him.

"Paul?" I ask in amazement. "Paul Sanders?" I stand up as he walks over and gives me a hug. "What in the world are you doing here?" I ask him.


	8. Chapter 8

_**Fifty Shades…Full Circle**_

**Chapter 8 (or Who the Fuck is Paul Sanders?)**

"Same as you, I guess. Looking at a plane," he smiles at me. "You look wonderful, Ana. Marriage agrees with you."

"Thank you. We've worked things out. It's good," I tell him and smile. "You're looking well yourself."

"Is Christian buying a plane?" he asks.

"Yes. It seems I gave his last one away," I tell him.

"What?" he asks.

"Christian had an episode in Colombia…"  
"Oh, yes. I heard about that. That must have been awful."

"Yes. It was. Part of the ransom deal was to give them the plane. I guess I could have kept the plane and let them have Christian, but my kids really like him. You know how that is." I tease. "Are you buying a plane?" I ask him.

"Yes. I've put it off for years and just rented a plane when I need one. I'm opening an office on the west coast and I just figured it was time to break down and invest in permanent transportation," he smiles. "Do you have time for a cup of coffee?" he asks.

"Yes. I think so. My husband is otherwise engaged in negotiations." I nod toward the window where the plane sits.

"That's what he's looking at? Wow. I'm nowhere near that. Just a small Leer. Has he bought an airline company that I haven't heard about?" he smirks.

"No. He just does things in a big way, sometimes," I sigh.

Paul pours himself a cup of coffee and me a cup of hot water. He hands me the mug and a tea bag. "How did you know I prefer tea?" I ask him.

He shrugs, "I don't know. I suppose you mentioned it and I filed it away somewhere."

"Seriously, Ana. I have been thinking about you," he says as he sips the hot brew.

"Me? Why?" I ask.

"As I said, I'm opening an office on the west coast. Once before, I offered you a job if you stayed in Savannah, but since you didn't; I was wondering if you were still interested in going back to work. Assuming you haven't already."

"Actually I am. I started to look last fall, but then I got pregnant… and stopped." I take a moment to steel myself when I talk about Sam. "I actually was seriously thinking of starting to look again."

"Ana, I was so sorry to hear about the accident. I know that must have been difficult for you both."

"Yes. It was very difficult. We're still trying to get through it. You knew about it?" I ask.

"You aren't hard to keep up with. All one has to do is turn on the news or pick up a paper. The elite rich seem to capture headlines," he tells me.

"So, I'm elite rich?" I ask.

"Oh, yes. I'd say so," he sips his coffee again.

"Well, tell me more about this new office," I ask.

"I had been looking to expand for a while and finally took the plunge. The west coast is where a lot of the action is and I needed to be there to keep up."

He leans forward. "Here is what I'm thinking. My office is in Sacramento. I know you're in Seattle and have no intention of moving, but I thought you could work from home. We'll set you up an office, provide all the technology. You'll have an assistant in the Sacramento office. You can send your edits to her via email. You can attend meetings via video conferencing. I would need for you to come to the office maybe once a quarter or every six weeks or so. I'll cover your travel and expenses," he tells me. "Is that something you think you might be interested in?"

"Oh, Paul that sounds perfect. Yes. Yes I'm very interested." I'm practically jumping at him.

"Look I know you'll need to discuss this with your husband. Here's my card and I'll put my personal cell on here." He pulls out a business card and a pen and writes his number on it and hands it to me. "Please give me a call and we can discuss this further if you're interested. I think we can make this work and I'd really like that."

"I need to get over to my broker and look at this jet out there." We stand up and Paul gives me a hug. "I has been good to see you, Ana."

About that time I see Christian heading for us. I hope he didn't see Paul hug me, but I know he did.

Christian walks up and puts his arm around my waist and kisses my forehead, "Ana?"

"Christian. This is Paul Sanders. He is a friend of Bob's. I met him while I was in Savannah. He's looking at planes too."

"Yes. I'm familiar with Mr. Sanders. South Atlantic Publishing, isn't it?" Christian shakes his hand.

"Yes. I'm here looking at a jet and just happened to run into your lovely wife."

"Yes, she is _my_ lovely wife," he pulls me closer and smiles down at me. Christian seems to be in a pissing contest, but I think he's in it by himself.

Paul nods to the plane Christian is looking at, "That's very impressive, Mr. Grey."

"Call me Christian. Yes. I've been eyeing it for a while now. I think we will work something out on it."

"Well, Christian it was nice to finally meet you. Ana, it was nice running in to you. I'll look forward to hearing from you. Good luck on the plane." He smiles and says as he walks away.

"What did he mean he 'looks forward to hearing from you'?" Damn. I knew the shit was going to hit.

"It's a long story. How did you know Paul?" I ask.

"That doesn't answer my question, but I know exactly who Paul Sanders is and how you know him. Did you think I wouldn't?" he asks.

"Actually I'm surprised you haven't mentioned him before now."

"I would have when you got home, but I was trying to recover from a near fatal gunshot wound to my chest," he reminds me.

"A gunshot wound you received from a very unhappy husband, as I recall. Let's discuss this later, okay?" I glare at him.

"Okay. But I won't forget about it," he says.

"Christian. I know you won't forget about it," I sigh and reach up and give him a kiss.

"Okay. Come look at these remodel specs and see what you think." Christian takes me back and we go over the basic plans and decide to take them back to the hotel to look over.

"Well Mr. Grey, I'll be get in touch with the owner and make your proposal and get back to you. You should be hearing something from me within the hour. Joseph is at your disposal the rest of the weekend and we'll get you back to Seattle on Monday."

"Thank you. I'll expect your call." Christian shakes hands with Jeff and we head for the car. Taylor is not far behind us. I hate that we took him away from Gail this weekend, but Christian wanted him with us to check the plane over for any problems that he might have with security. Christian and I get back in the car and Taylor slides in up front.

We all exit the car when we get back to ZaZa. "Jason, Is your room okay?" I ask him.

"It's real different, but it's fine. I wish Gail could be here." He says running his hand over the stubble of his buzz cut.

"Maybe you could bring her back here sometime on vacation," I suggest.

"Maybe." He shakes his head.

"Taylor, Mrs. Grey and I are going up and review these plans and I'll be waiting on some phone negotiations. Take the rest of the day and enjoy yourself. I doubt we'll be going anywhere." Christian tells him.

"Yes. Sir. You and Mrs. Grey enjoy your afternoon," he nods as he heads back to his room. "I'll be on standby if you need anything or decide to go out."

"Do you want any lunch before we head back up to the room, baby?" Christian asks.

"I'm not really hungry yet. We could just eat in a while and have a late diner," I suggest.

"Whatever you want, sweetheart." He pushes the button to call the elevator.

We get on the elevator, after a young couple exits, and Christian pushes the button for the eleventh floor. As soon as the car starts to move he has me pinned to the wall and is trying to consume me. His hands are all over my body and he is sucking the air from my lungs. As quickly as he grabbed me he lets me go as the car stops on the eleventh floor. We exit and get to our suite. Before I can get to the bedroom to get undressed Christian's phone rings. I can hear him talking to Jeff. "Grey….I said 60.4 and that's it."

"What's 60.4?" I ask him.

"My offer on the plane," he answers.

"60.4 what?" I ask him cautiously.

"Million."

"Million!?" I'm in shock.

"Yes," he answers calmly.

"Christian, we don't need that much plane." I tell him. "That's just obscene."

"What do you mean?" he asks.

"I'd like to take back my half." I tell him. "You can spend what you want for your half but, I'm not spending that kind of money on that plane."

"What?" he asks. "You can't take back your half. You have no half. We own all of it together, not half and half."

I have no response to that. He's the one buying the thing. I know nothing about any of this. I head back to the bedroom and get down to my bra and panties. Slipping an oversized T-shirt on I take the ponytail out of my hair. Christian doesn't change staying in his jeans and white shirt, but he does kick his shoes off. He walks up behind me and runs his hands in my hair massaging my scalp and shaking my hair free of the ponytail. "Mmm. That feels good." I smile back at him. He gives me a quick kiss on my cheek. "Want some champagne?" he asks.

"Sure. We might as well. It's here." We walk back into the parlor and Christian pops another bottle. He brings it in and sets the bottle and two glasses on the coffee table. The hotel has left us a tray of fruit and cheeses with table water crackers and we dive in on those with the champagne. I sit on the sofa with my back to the arm and my legs stretched out and he sits the same at the other end and our legs wrap around each other as we drink and snack and talk.

"So?" Christian asks.

"So what?" I reply. I know what he's asking, but I'm not going to make it too easy.

"You know very well so what," he glares at me.

"Really, if you want an answer you need to ask a question." I tell him licking the cheese from my fingers.

"For fucks sake. Paul Sanders. Why is he expecting a call from you?" he asks.

"Oh. That." I take a sip of champagne. "Well. Ages ago, when I was introduced to him in Savannah, he offered me a job if I decided to stay in Savannah."

"And?" he is insistent.

"And we all know I decided not to stay in Savannah. So, he told me he is opening an office on the west coast and he offered me an editor's position in the new office."

"He's opening an office in Seattle?" he asks.

"Nope. Sacramento" I tell him still eating my grapes.

"You aren't thinking of moving to Sacramento!" he looks horrified.

"Good heavens, no! Don't be silly." I admonish him. "He said I could work from home and go to the office once a quarter or so." I tell him.

"What did you tell him?" he asks.

I take my toes and press them into his crotch and knead him with my toes and the ball of my foot. I can see him catch himself a bit as I do that.

"Don't try to distract me. What did you fucking tell him?" he is demanding.

"I told him I was interested, but he told me to talk it over with you and then get back to him." I tell him. "That's why he is expecting my call."

"At least he has some sense," he scoffs. His phone rings again ,"Grey…I said 60.4." he hangs up and pitches it on the table.

"What are you going to tell him?" he asks me.

"Well, we haven't talked about it yet, have we?" I cock my head and look at him.

"I still don't know why you won't work for Grey Publishing," he tells me.

"Christian. You know why. We've been over and over this. I don't want to work for my husband."

"But you wouldn't be working for me. You would be running it yourself."

"Baby. I get up and crawl over and lie on him putting my head on his chest. "I don't want to run anything. I want to be an editor. I have no head for business. It just doesn't interest me in any way at all."

"Then work as an editor for us instead of the competition." He strokes my hair and kisses my head.

"Christian. You said I could go back to work last summer. And I was working on it before Sam. I need to do this now. Please support me."

"Baby, I support you. I just don't like you working for anyone else. Especially someone like Paul Sanders."

"What's wrong with Paul Sanders? He's a gentleman. He has treated me with nothing but respect. He knows that we're married and he respects that."

"He didn't respect it in Savannah," he wraps his arm around me.

"What do you mean?" I sit up and look at him.

"I know he tried to move in on you."

"Christian we were separated at the time and he backed off when I told him to." I lie back down on his chest. "Besides when he made a move, it made me realize how much I missed you and wanted to be with you. That's when I called and asked you to come get me."

Christian's phone rings again and he leans over to answer it. "Grey….What about 60.4 is he not understanding?...That's right."

He pitches his phone on the table again. "Oh, I guess if it's what you really want. But remember I'm keeping an eye on him. And on you."

"Thank you." I move up and put my arms around his neck and kiss him. "You can keep your eyes on me all you want."

I seal his mouth and dissolve into him, making out on the sofa. I'm on top straddling him leaning forward and kissing his neck, which makes him giggle.

"Did I hear a giggle, Mr. Grey?" I ask him as I kiss his neck.

"I don't giggle, but I do like what you're doing." I can feel him growing under me.

His phone rings again. "No. I'll get it. Don't you move," I tell him as I sit up and look down at him.

"But.."

"But nothing?" I tell him.

I pick up the phone. "Mr. Grey's phone….hello Jeff…he's a little busy can I give him a message?"

I bend down and kiss him while I listen to Jeff. "Okay. I'll tell him…. thank you Jeff." I hang up and toss the phone on the table, then resume kissing my husband.

"What did he want?" Christian asks.

"Oh. You seem to have bought a plane." I whisper to him.

"Well this is my lucky day," he grins.

"It's about to get luckier." I whisper. Smiling down at him I wiggle my hips rubbing his already rock hard erection.

"Owww. Careful." He grins and warns me. "That's a tender place."

"I know." I bend down and kiss him as he slides his hands down my back and cupping my butt, he kneads my cheeks. I brace with my arms, my hands on either side of his head as my hair falls forward veiling our heads.

"That tickles," he blows my hair out of his face. As I sit up he moves his hands to cup my breasts kneading and rubbing them. "I like looking up at you."

"I like being up here." I tell him as I wiggle on his crotch again.

"I mean it. Stop that or you'll make me come in my jeans," he growls at me.

"I can't recall you ever doing that." I give him a quizzical look.

"Not since I was fifteen. I came everywhere when I was fifteen. Bedroom, bathroom, in my car, shower in the boy's locker room," he grins at me.

"I'm glad you finally figured out what girls are for," I smile at him. "Do you ever masturbate anymore? I ask him.

"Well, I wasn't expecting that question," he clears his throat.

"Do you?" I repeat.

"I don't need to. I met you and you have kept me a very satisfied man," he responds.

"You didn't answer my question. Do you?" I ask again.

"Why do you want to know?" he asks.

"I don't know. I just do." I smile down at him.

"Well, do you?" he asks.

"I asked first," I tell him.

"Shit! Occasionally. Okay? Occasionally," he confesses.

"Really? When?" I ask.

"I've answered your question. Now you answer mine. Do you?" he asks.

"Not in a long time. Sometimes when you're away on business and I think about you, I get a little needy." I confess.

"You do? When you think about me?" he grins. "I like that image in my head."

"When do you."

"Same as you. Sometimes when I'm on a trip and you aren't with me. Sometimes during the day to relieve stress. Sometimes when I think about us or I think about you. Sometimes when…"

"Wait. That's a lot of sometimes. Seems like you're a pretty busy boy when I'm not around."

"How about I get busy with you. Right here, right now." He cups my head and pulls me to him taking my mouth again.

We finally make it to the bedroom and fall into the downy bed and make love most of the afternoon; then fall asleep to recover. I wake before Christian and look over at his naked body lying next to me on top of the comforter. It's all I can do to keep my hands off of him. He looks so peaceful when he's asleep, so calm and so relaxed. Total opposite of when he's awake. His face is still so beautiful. I guess it always will be. His body is still amazing; still so firm and cut. Wonder if he'll ever get a little pot belly when he gets older. Probably not. He wouldn't allow it. I know I'll love him no matter what he looks like. I'm going to be thirty this next birthday. Aagg!

I hope he always loves me, even when my body is older and gravity has taken its toll. I think he will; no, I know he will. I've never really ever doubted him. I have never had any doubt about what he feels for me. Besides, he knows he's had his one. He knows I'll leave him if he ever strays again. Even though he and Amy never actually had sex so they say, that was his one slip. Would I actually leave him if he slipped again? Who knows? Just as long as he believes I will.

Well, my mind is going down a dark rabbit hole. I snuggle over to him and just stare at his sweet sleeping face. My nose is only a couple of inches away from his and I can feel his slow steady breathing. I just love breathing in the air that has just left his body. It's like I have him inside of me. "What are you doing?" he murmurs never opening his eyes.

"Just looking at you," I admit.

"Why?" he asks.

"Just thinking about how much I love you. Wondering if you'll always love me," I whisper.

Christian pulls me closer and kisses me. "Baby, Grace and Carrick saved my life, but you made me realize that it was worth living. I could never not love you."

"Christian. You're gonn'a make me cry." That was so sweet.

"It's just the truth. Now stop thinking about things like that." He rolls over on his back and I lay my head on his belly and play with his happy trail with my finger. He is in a state I rarely see…flaccid. He must be really relaxed. Ooops. No. Spoke too soon. Here it comes. I watch as it gradually gets thicker and begins to point North. I'm only inches away from it as I watch it rise from its sleeping place.

"If you don't stop playing with me, it's going to hit you in the face," he jokes.

"Hit me in the face? Just how big do you think it is?" I tease him.

"Baby, I know how big it is," he grins down at me.

I get up and move over him. Lying on top of him I move up on his body until my mouth meets his. He engulfs me in his arms and rolls me over until he is on top of me. I can feel his knee parting me and I willingly let him. He pulls my arms over my head and holds them as he nuzzles and nips at my breasts. Bringing my legs up to my chest I can feel that he is fully erect now and he probes at my entrance almost begging to gain entry. I can feel myself quiver with his every knock at my door. I finally feel him slide in slowly and smoothly, with one continuous push.

"God you feel good," he gasps. I can feel him withdraw just as he entered, slowly and smoothly. He repeats the process again and again; gliding in and out with smooth determination. His lovemaking is slow and sweet this time. Taking time to cherish me, almost worshiping me, his head is buried in my neck and I hear him whisper, "I love you." in my ear.

"Oh, God Christian. I love you. I love you so much," I almost want to cry. I wrap him in my arms and pull him as close as I can. He isn't hurried with his lovemaking and it goes for what seems an eternity at this slow controlled pace. We just hold each other with him inside of me; both of us close to the edge yet still so far from it and no urgency to get there.

I am wrapped in Christian's arms and he is tenderly holding me; his head buried in my neck as he continues his slow thrusting. My hips are in synch with his and meet him every time he buries himself in me.

"Are you ready?" he whispers. I look up into his eyes and nod, "Yes." He kisses me softly as he begins to increase his rhythm thrusting faster and harder. Not realizing how close to the edge he had already pushed me, I quickly begin to feel the pulling in my tummy as he repeatedly hits the already sensitive spot inside of me.

"Oh, god, baby. You're so beautiful," he murmurs to me. His breath is becoming ragged as he continues his push forward. I can feel the quivering inside each time he thrusts. "Christian, baby. Please. I need you." I am able to gasp.

"I'm right here. Right here, baby," he is able to growl to me. "Come for me. Come for me, sweetheart." I can hear him whisper.

That's all it takes for me to reach the top and I feel myself begin to fall. I feel as though I am falling into him. The delicious contractions claim me and I feel myself tighten around him, capturing that part of him, claiming him. "That's my girl. That's my sweet baby," he whispers to me as I lose my senses. I am lost in him. He allows me to relish my climax. As it starts to wane he begins the race to his own. Thrusting harder and faster, his breathing is ragged and his heart racing. I don't try to meet him anymore. I still and let him set his own pace until he tenses and I feel him tremble above me. "I love you so much," I whisper to him as he spills into me.

Finally, I feel him relax and fall on me gasping for air, his heart racing. He kisses my face with each gasp for air. "Oh, god. I need you. I need you so much, baby," he pants.

After a cleansing shower I wrap myself in my robe and walk out to the parlor. Christian is in his robe and sipping on the tepid champagne we left on the table. "What do you want to do for dinner?" he asks.

"I don't care. We can go out or eat in. Doesn't matter." I tell him.

"I vote for in," he gives me a sweet kiss.

"That works. Where's the room service menu?" I ask and he hands it to me. "I'm not seeing much," I tell him looking it over. "Just get me a mixed green salad and the rib eye, rare," I request.

Christian picks up the phone and he orders two of the same and we pull the champagne from the fridge and pour another glass.

"Oh. I forgot. Jeff said we are to meet him at the office at nine, Monday morning to sign the contracts, then meet with the designer. Then they will fly us home and take the plane back for remodeling. "

"That was important to know," he tells me. "Remind me not to hire you as my secretary."

"Well I was otherwise occupied when I took the call," I take a sip of my champagne.

"Any other important information I need to know?" he asks.

I shake my head. "No. I don't believe so."

"So Christian. I'm going to need an office if I'm going to work from home." I'm so excited.

"Yes. I suppose you will," he nods.

"What do you think? Where shall we put it?" I ask him.

"Take the library and turn it into an office," he tells me.

"I hate to do that. I like having a library," I tell him.

"Baby. Do whatever you want. Just call Elliott and Gia and have them work up a design. Then have it decorated," he explains.

"You don't care?" I ask.

"Baby I care that you need an office, but I want you to have whatever you want."

"Christian do you care that I'm going back to work?" I ask.

"Do you mean do I want you to go to work? No, I don't. Do I support the fact that you want to? Yes I do. If that's what you really want, then we'll do whatever it takes to make it happen. If that includes building you an office, then by all means build whatever you want."

I throw my arms around his neck. "Oh, Christian. I'm so happy. I've wanted this for so long now."

He smiles over at me. "Well you don't have the job yet. Have you discussed salary?" he asks.

"No. I never thought about salary. I really don't need one," I tell him.

"Well, Paul Sanders fucking well needs to pay you what your worth."

"Oh? How much am I worth? In your estimation as a brilliant CEO and owner of a publishing company?" I ask as I smile at him.

He gives me a quick kiss, "There isn't enough money in the world to pay you what you're worth to me."

"Damn. How do you always do that?" I ask him.

"Do what?" he asks.

"Know exactly what to say," I tell him.

I see the corners of his mouth form a sly grin and the twinkle in his eye, "That's what makes me a brilliant CEO, baby."


	9. Chapter 9

_**Fifty Shades…Full Circle**_

**Chapter 9**

**A/N: I want to thank everyone for all the really great reviews and comments. They are what keep me going and I read each and every one. I have even made a few friends through them. **

**This chapter is for all of you who keep asking for Ana to turn the tables on Christian. Domme Ana.**

After our room service meal and some remodel talk we head to bed for the night. Christian has had his bath and is stretched out on top of the duvet waiting on me. When I finally get finished and back into the bedroom I can hear his steady breathing and the occasional little snore. He's asleep. I have plans for Mr. Grey.

I went shopping before our trip and the table is fixing to turn. Walking into the bathroom with my goodie bag I take out my supplies. I begin to assemble my things and I put on a black satin thong and a black lace and satin bustier lacing it up the front. I grab my hair and pull it up into a high ponytail and braid it. Then I locate those shoes Christian wanted me to wear. I slip on the six inch, black leather, sandal stilettos and wrap the leather ties around my ankles tying them at the back of my ankle. Looking in the mirror I almost scare myself. Damn. Who knew I had it in me. The bustier pushes my breasts high and they mound over the fabric; it exaggerates their rise and fall with each breath. Turning around to the back I look at my rear. The silky pale skin on the apples of my butt cheeks is a striking contrast to the black satin of the garments. Finally I pull out the brown leather riding crop I have purchased as well as the satin drapery ties.

Peeking back out into the bedroom, Christian is still asleep. I quietly walk over to the bed where he is sleeping and gently slip a satin tie around his ankle and tie it to a bed post. Good. He didn't wake up. I repeat the process gently with his other ankle. Luckily he tends to sleep with his arms over his head, so I am able to secure his hands and tie them to the headboard. I look down at my handiwork, my beautiful Christian spread eagle and bound. At my mercy at last.

God this makes me feel so sexy, so in charge. I'm going to drive Mr. Grey crazy before I fuck his brains out. I pull a chair to the end of the bed and sit leaning back in it my legs crossed at the knee and my hands clasped around my knee, just watching him sleep. It doesn't take long for him to try to turn over and change positions. He can't. He gently pulls at the ties in his sleep until he wakes up and notices his predicament.

"What the fuck?" he bellows. He pulls at the restraint, but he can't free himself. "Fucking hell!" He looks down to see his bound feet and notices me sitting at the foot of the bed.

I give him a wicked smile. "Why Mr. Grey, you seem to be all tied up." I stand up and walk over to him sliding the end of the crop over his skin from his feet to his chin.

"Ana. What the fuck are you doing?" he growls at me.

"I just thought I'd turn the tables on you for once." I tell him gently flicking the end of the crop against his skin.

"Untie me," he demands.

"Not just yet. I have plans for you, Mr. Grey." I tell him in my best seductive voice.

"Fuck! I mean it, Ana. Untie me." He pulls and tugs at the satin cords binding him. "I'm not playing around. Un- fucking- tie me." he yells at me.

"Why?" I ask him as I get on the bed and crawl over to straddle him sitting on his abdomen. Looking down at him I watch his muscles flex as he pulls and strains against the ties.

"Because I'm telling you to. This isn't funny."

"Baby. It isn't meant to be funny." I growl at him. I hover over him on all fours and slowly run my tongue over his chest and circle his nipples nipping them between my teeth. Then I gently kiss his skin and trail my kisses down his chest and his abdomen stopping at his navel. I kiss it and circle it with my tongue. I can feel his tummy tremble underneath me.

"Ana. I need you to untie me," he tries to calmly tell me.

"You're gonna' like this baby," I whisper. "Just relax."

Reaching behind me I take his scrotum in my hand and softly knead it in my palm. I can feel him becoming erect and begin to grow. He gets longer and thicker as I stroke him and encourage him to expand.

"No don't. Please don't," his voice is almost a sob. "Ana. Please. Please, baby. Untie me. I can't do this. I can't." I look up because the sound in his voice isn't one of desire it is fear. The sight of him breaks my heart. His eyes are shut tight and there is a tortured look on his face. "Please. Please don't. Please don't make me," he almost whimpers.

"Christian, no." I quickly scramble and untie his hands then his ankles. "Baby. I'm sorry. I didn't think." I can feel the tears welling in my eyes. My God what have I done? How could I have been so cruel?

Christian doesn't move. He lies still with his eyes fused shut and a look of agony on his face. His entire body is trembling. I lie down beside him and put my arms around him and try to pull him to me and I can feel his heart is racing. "Sweetheart. Please, I'm sorry. I'm so sorry."

He puts his arm over his eyes and I can see a tear leak from the corner of his eye and run down his temple into his hair. "Christian. What can I do? What can I do?" I put my head on his chest and try to hold him.

After a time I feel his hand stroke my hair. "I'm sorry, baby," he says.

I look up at him, "No sweetheart. I didn't think. I'm so sorry I did this."

He puts his arms around me and pulls me to him. "It's okay," he whispers in a husky voice.

I move up and look at into his eyes and kiss him. He cups my face and wipes my tears with his thumbs. I kiss the place where his tear streaked his face. And we stare into each other for an eternity. He finally pulls me close again and then sits up looking at me.

"Come here," he tells me. I move closer to him on my knees. He reaches up and loosens the braid in my hair and runs his hands through my hair to loosen it. It falls loosely over my shoulders and around my breasts. He unties the satin ribbon on my bustier and forcefully unlaces it stripping it from my body. Then he grips the elastic of my thong with his hands and tears it and pulls it off of me. "There. That's better. You can keep the shoes." He runs his hand through my hair and cups my head pulling my mouth to meet his. Bending me down on the bed I feel his weight on me as he gently and sweetly makes love to me.

We lie in each other's arms holding each other close. "Christian. I just didn't think about what I was doing. I'm so sorry. I wouldn't hurt you for the world."

"Shh. It's okay. I know what you were trying to do." He gently plays with my hair. " I guess there's just a part of me that's still fucked up. I don't know if I'll ever get it worked out."

"It's my fault. What I did was bound to bring all those feelings to the surface again. You're not fucked up, sweetheart. The way you reacted was normal for anyone who had been through something like that. Christian, you aren't fucked up. Do you understand me? You aren't."

He strokes my face with his fingers and sighs, "I try so hard, Ana. I try so hard to just let it go. Every time I think I have it beat, it creeps back up."

"But I thought you said you had let it go; that you realized what really happened. I thought it was okay now."

"Baby, I did finally understand what happened and was able to realize that it wasn't my fault and I don't blame myself for it anymore. But the memory of it is sometimes hard to deal with. It's like the nightmares," he explains. "Sometimes the feelings just come back, like tonight. I remember what it was like to be helpless, not being able to stop it or defend myself. Just waiting, not knowing when it was going to start, how bad it was going to hurt or how much I was going to be humiliated. Not knowing what I'd have to endure or when it would end.

"I remember I wanted to cry and I wanted my mom so bad. I kept praying that she would find out and come save me; make it all stop. On the other hand I never wanted her to see me like that; all tied up with my erection at full staff and usually someone hanging off the end of it. I could never have lived with that."

" I just recreated the abuse. I can't believe I was so thoughtless."

"Don't worry about it, baby. Things are going to come up all my life that remind me of it. I just have to learn to deal with it and work through it."

"I promise I'll never do that again," I swear to him.

"I sort of like a little creativity in the bedroom. Don't ever stop that. Just don't tie me up again," he tells me. "And I like the shoes. You can wear those anytime."

We hold each other and talk until the wee hours. I love it when he opens up and really talks to me. I feel so close to him. I understand him so much more. After we're all talked out, we finally fall asleep.

* * *

"Christian. What are you going to do about Teddy's cowboy hat?" I ask him while I sip my tea.

"Well, I have no idea how to buy a cowboy hat. I guess I could ask the concierge to find me one."

"One? Don't you mean two?" I ask.

"Why two?" he looks perplexed.

"What about Grace? You don't think you're going to get Teddy one and not get her one, do you?" I tell him.

"What does she want with a cowboy hat?" he asks.

"I have no idea, but I guarantee you, she'll have a fit if you get him one and don't get her one." I tell him. "It's Sunday. You'd better call down and see if they can even find one on Sunday."

Christian picks up the phone and calls down to the concierge.

"Yes. This is Mr. Grey….yes, thank you…look I need two children's cowboy hats….No not a toy, real ones…..I don't know the size. One for an eight year old boy and one for a three year old girl…yes…that's right. We're leaving in the morning, I need them by then…..doesn't matter what it costs….just make them nice….good let me know when you have 'em."

"We should have two," he raises two fingers, "cowboy hats before we leave."

"Good. You couldn't go home without them you know."

I'm on the sofa in my robe, my back against the arm and my legs stretched out, drinking tea and Christian is in his jeans drinking coffee. We are sharing the Sunday paper they delivered to us with breakfast.

"Anything you want to do today?" he asks me.

"Not really. I'm just enjoying the peace and quiet and spending a little quality time with you." I smile at him over my paper. "And thank you for not dragging that damn laptop out this morning."

"We aim to please, Mrs. Grey," he winks at me.

Christian's phone dings and he picks it up, "Grey…no I don't think so…take the day and relax, I doubt we are going out….I'll call if we change our minds…..have you heard from Gail?...is everything okay?...good….we need to be at the office by 9 a.m…..right…they'll send the car."

"That was Taylor. Everything is okay at home."

"The kids are okay?" I ask.

"I guess so, he didn't say otherwise," Christian tells me as he peruses the paper.

"We probably should call them this morning." I tell him.

"Well, let's do it then, mommy." He crawls over on me and gives me a big kiss on his way to pick up his phone. He dials the house.

"Gail. Mr. Grey….how are things there?...and the children?...yes please…..hi son…yes we miss you too…are you taking care of things?...good….yes I'm working on it….where is Grace?...let me talk to her….why?...put her on anyway….what?...okay…..here's your mother….I love you…he hands me the phone.

"Teddy? Hi baby. How are you?"

"Good mom. I miss you."

"I miss you too sweetie. How is Grace?" I ask.

"Okay I guess. She's busy," he tells me.

"Busy doing what?"

"She's playing. Dad said he wanted to talk to her, but she wouldn't."

"That's okay. Are you taking care of Gail and Grace?"

"I'm trying, but Gail keeps telling me what to do," he complains.

"You need to mind Gail. We'll be home tomorrow."

"Good. I can't take care of everything by myself."

"Well, thank you for trying. We'll see you tomorrow. I love you and I miss you."

"Okay. Bye mom." I end the call.

"Aren't they sweet?" I look over at Christian. "I just love them so much." I get a little teary.

"Yep. We did pretty good in the children department," he says looking at the paper.

"Christian, have you thought about a wedding present for Mia and Ethan?" I ask him.

"Not really. I guess we need to come up with something," he says.

"Mia really likes Escala. She was saying that she wished she could afford it."

"You want me to give my sister Escala for a wedding present?" he looks stunned.

"Well, we won't ever use it again."

"Ana. That would be a six million dollar wedding present. I love my sister, but I don't think so," he scoffs.

"Well, maybe not give it to her. Finance it for her?" I ask.

"No." he says flatly. "Now, I know you're going to ask me why not, so I'll just go ahead and tell you. First of all that's a ridiculous amount to spend for a wedding gift. Second, they would invite us over on occasion and I doubt either you or I ever want to go back there again. Third we didn't give Kate and Elliott anything near that for a wedding present so it wouldn't be fair."

"Okay." I go back to my paper.

"That's it? Okay?" he asks.

"Uh huh. I see your point." I nod.

"You do? Since when do you give up on something that easily?" he asks.

"Christian I was just asking. I never really thought that you'd just give it away," I tell him. "Have you thought about what you are going to do with it?"

"I have no idea. Sell it eventually," he says.

"Maybe you could use it for visiting business associates when they come into town," I suggest. "That way you could deduct it on your taxes."

"Where the fuck do you get your tax information? Besides, I already have an apartment for out of town guests," he tells me.

"You do? Really? Where?" I ask.

"At Escala. I have an apartment on a lower level for that."

"You have another apartment at Escala?" I'm stunned. "You never told me that."

"I've had it for years. I had it before we met," he finally tells me.

"Why didn't I know that?" I ask.

"I don't know. I guess you never asked," he shrugs.

I throw a pillow at him and it sails through the paper he is holding in front of his face.

"Fuck! What was that for?" he demands.

"For not telling me about that."

"It never dawned on me that you didn't know. It's not like it is some sort of national secret."

"What other property do we have that you haven't told me about?"

"Nothing that I know of! Shit, I just never thought about you not knowing about Escala. And if you throw another fucking pillow at me, you'll be in a large amount of trouble," he scolds me.

I fold my arms and glare at him. "That's right, go all pouty now," he says picking his paper up.

"I'm not pouty," I shoot back at him.

"Yes you are. You always pout when you lose and argument," he says as he cocks his head at me.

"I didn't know we were arguing."

"We aren't. I've already won that one," he tries not to grin.

He looks at me and sticks his lower lip out. "Stop it." I tell him.

"Stop what?" he continues to mock me.

"What you're doing." He sticks his lip out farther. "Stop it!"

I pick up another pillow and launch it at him hitting him square in the face.

"Okay. That's it," he says calmly folding the paper. "I gave you fair warning." He stands up and walks down to my end of the sofa. He leans over and grabs me throwing me over his shoulder.

"What are you doing?" I ask.

"What happens to disobedient little girls ?" he asks.

"Nothing. They usually get a second chance." I smack him on his butt as he carries me back to the bedroom.

"No second chances here. You need to be brought into line."

Christian reaches the bedroom and leans forward throwing me on the bed. I bounce and then get up on my knees as he walks toward the closet.

"Christian, don't spank me," I beg. I'm really not in the mood for a spanking.

"Don't you think you deserve a spanking?" he asks.

"No. I really don't want a spanking," I try to explain to him.

"What do you think you deserve? You disobeyed me," he teases.

"I don't know, but I don't want a spanking," I give him my best look of contrition.

He walks back over to me, wearing nothing but his jeans, holding a tie in his hands. "Hold your hands out," he orders me.

"No." I tell him.

"What? No?" he asks. "You're just making this so much worse. Put your hands out."

I reluctantly hold my arms out and he takes them together and binds them with his tie.

"Now. Take your robe off," he commands.

"I can't. My hands are tied," I tell him.

He rolls his eyes and unties my hands and shoves my robe off my shoulders and down to the floor leaving me naked. Grabbing my hands he reties them. He stops and brushes my hair from my shoulder and softly kisses my neck. "I'm not going to hurt you, baby. I love you." he whispers near my ear. When he kisses that spot on my neck it almost paralyzes me. He quickly pushes me back on to the bed. "Scoot up toward the headboard," he tells me. I do as I am told and he follows me and then pulls my arms up and secures them to the headboard stretching me out. Hovering over me he looks down into my eyes and gives me a soft sweet kiss. "I'm not going to spank you. But I am going to punish you. Okay, baby?" he whispers. "I won't hurt you," he kisses me again.

I nod, "Okay. I guess."

Christian bends down and softly kisses my breast and just as quickly he sucks it into his mouth. He kneads the other breast in his hand as he sucks and pulls and circles it with his tongue. I gasp as he tries to devour me. "Shit Christian. Not so hard."

"Shhh!" He looks up at me over the mound of my breast. He continues to suckle me and I can feel his tongue against my skin. He finally stops and sits up on his knees grabbing me under my thighs as he lifts my hips off of the bed. Then taking pillows he slides them under my butt forcing my pelvis upward. Without warning buries his head in me. I almost scream as I feel him try to devour me.

"Oh, My, God," I gasp. "Christian. Shit, slow down."

He shakes his head and growls, "No.".

He is relentless as he greedily consumes me, never slowing down never stopping. It doesn't take long for me to be brought to the brink. My body is about at its limit and he shows no sign of backing off. I can feel my core beginning to pull and tingle. The nerves in my thighs are on edge and my tummy is trembling out of control. My breathing is ragged and I am almost in tears. It's a combination of pain and pleasurable; two sides of the same coin. I just know that he is not relenting. I finally feel myself explode against him. I arch my back as the climax begins to take my body. "Fuck! Christian!" The spasms take my groin as my tummy trembles out of control and I am unable to breath. Having my hands tied just makes the it all so much more intense. I finally feel myself being released from the tremors my body spawned and I am panting trying to catch my breath.

Christian doesn't stop. He hasn't slowed down, much less stopped the torture with his mouth. "Christian! No! Please!" I beg him. But he acts like he doesn't hear me. He continues to devour me, burying his head as deep as he can in me. I tug at my ligature, but it secures me in place I can feel the sensation begin again in my belly. The tingling and pulling as he continues to torture me. Over and over again I feel my belly jump and the undulation of his tongue is driving me senseless. He has pushed me to my limit again and I feel myself begin to fall helplessly to yet another intense climax. "Oh, God. Please." I almost scream. The spasms begin again clenching and pulling and my belly trembles and heaves underneath his touch. I shudder until I think I will faint and then finally I can feel it begin to release me as I try to catch my breath.

Christian pulls me closer, never leaving me. I can feel him continue to drive me out of my mind. His intensity does not diminish. He is on me with the same ferocity as when he began. "Christian. No. Please. Stop." My abdominal muscles are sore and tired. Another climax will kill me, and I feel like I want to cry . "Christian, please. I can't. I can't do it again."

I can hear him growl against me, as he drives me to the edge yet again. I am tired and can't resist anymore. Finally, I can do nothing but relent and accept this. I can feel my muscles beginning to tense in my belly and my groin begins to feel tight. "No, baby. Please." I whimper. Christian buries he head and becomes more ferocious. He is driving me, urging me, pushing to another climax. I can do nothing but accept it again as it takes my body. I whimper and cry out, "God no." My back arches and my groin is shoved against him as he pulls every last tremor out of me.

As I feel the climax begin to subside, Christian finally releases me. He crawls over me and claims my mouth with his. I can see the look on his face as he shimmies out of his jeans. A look I haven't seen since the last time we were in the playroom. He is in Dom mode. I can taste myself on him as he searches my mouth with his tongue. Then without warning he slams inside. "I'm going to fuck you now. This is for me." He balances on his knees and grabs my hips with his hands as he slams against me. I whimper as he is in to the hilt. He pounds me over and over with abandon. I can hear his ragged breathing as he races to his own climax. "Oh, fuck, fuck, fuck." He growls as he wildly drives. He is lost in his need to fuck; to fuck hard. I can see the sweat dripping from his brow and his hair is wet with perspiration. After an eternity, he throws his head back and tenses. "Oh. My. Fucking. God." he bellows. I can see the veins in his chest and neck as he achieves his release. His face is contorted and his body shudders with carnal pleasure. Soon his face relaxes and once again he looks like my husband. He releases my hips and folds over on me. Our bodies are wringing wet with perspiration and it mingles where our flesh comes together. I can feel our hearts racing and our breathing catching. "Are you okay?" he whispers. "Did I hurt you?"

"No. I'm okay." My chin begins to tremble and I begin to cry.

"Baby, what is it? I'm sorry. Don't cry, I'm sorry." He unties my hands and brushes the wet hair out of my eyes as he rains soft kisses over my face. He pulls me to him and squeezes me tight, "Oh, baby. I didn't mean to hurt you. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry."

"You didn't hurt me." I whimper. "You just scared me a little. I saw that look on your face and I didn't know what you were going to do."

"I didn't mean to scare you." He apologizes. "Why didn't you say something?"

"I couldn't. I couldn't speak. I couldn't remember what to say or get the words out." I cry against his bare chest. "Christian, don't do that to me again."

"I won't. I won't baby. I'm sorry. I didn't know you weren't having fun," he strokes my hair.

"I was…at first. It was just so…so overwhelming."

"Shhh. Shhh. Baby. Just rest. Let me hold you and you rest." He kisses my head and buries his nose in my hair. I'm so exhausted that I drift off in his arms.

I awaken to him scooping me up in his arms. He carries me to the bathroom and steps into the tub with me. Still cradling me, he sinks down into the warm water and bubbles. He cradles me in his lap and I rest my head against his chest.

"That's my sweet girl. Just let me hold you."

I feel my muscles relax in the warm water. "Are you okay?" I ask looking up at him.

"I feel like a real shit, but other than that I'm fine."

I stroke his cheek with my fingers, "Baby, you just scared me a little, that's all. I'm okay." I smile up at him.

"Are you sure?" he asks.

I nod and smile, "Yes. I'm sure."

"Thank God." He sighs. "I don't know what got into me. I was so scared that I had hurt you. Baby, I don't ever want to hurt you. I'd cut off my arms before I hurt you."

"You might need to cut off your tongue instead of your arms." I give him a smirk.

He gives me a weak laugh and a smile. "I love you." He strokes my cheek.

"I know. I love you too." He lifts my chin and kisses me with all the tenderness he has. I wrap my arms around his neck and kiss him back letting him know that we are okay.

"Here. Turn around and I'll wash your hair. It got all sweaty. I sit between his legs as he wets my hair and pours shampoo in his hands. I think I will melt when he begins to massage the suds into my hair. He gently moves his fingertips against my scalp and then slides his soapy hands down and massages my neck and shoulders. "God, that feels so good." I lean my head back and crumple against him.

His hands move around to hold me as he kneads my breasts with his soapy palms. "Baby, I'm so sorry. I love you so much," he whispers in my ear. "I lost myself. I'll never let it happen again. Never."

I turn around to look at him, "Christian. It's okay. You didn't hurt me. It isn't what you did, it was just.. just how you did it…the look on your face. It was just something…Oh, I don't know. I can't explain it."

"I know. I felt it. I don't know where it came from. It just sort of crept over me," he tries to explain.

"Christian," I pause "maybe we need to be more careful with all this stuff. I think we've both stepped over a line this weekend."

"Yeah. You're probably right," he sighs.

"I like our kinky fuckery, but maybe we need to start asking each other if we're up for it before we jump in," I explain.

"I know. Sex has always been so good for us. I like that we never let it get boring, but I never want to hurt you or scare you," he tells me.

"And I never want to go too far again." I look back at him. " We can still get adventurous, just be more cautious with each other," I suggest.

"That works for me. I never want to mess us up. I never want to ruin us," he squeezes me.

I crawl up in his lap and put my arms around his neck kiss him. "Mmm. I never want to lose this. I never want to lose you," he whispers against my mouth.

"Me either," I whisper back.

"Let's get that soap out of your hair."

* * *

**After Clarity, I had an overwhelming number of PMs from people telling me they were tired of all the drama and wanted quiet happy times for the Greys. Now I'm getting several people saying that it is getting boring. Leave me a review or send me a PM and let me know what you prefer. I try to give something to everyone, if I can. There will be things coming up that should add some drama or conflict for them. For those looking for cheating or more kidnapping type scenarios, you probably will not find it in this book. This will be more about relationships, personal conflict and discovery. But I do want to write what you are interested in.**

**Thanks to everyone for their comments and suggestions.**


	10. Chapter 10

_**Fifty Shades…Full Circle**_

**Chapter 10**

**A/N:Thanks for all the wonderful comments. I appreciate each and every one. **

* * *

"Count them not one but two, I repeat two cowboy hats, Mrs. Grey," he holds up two fingers.

Looking up at him I want to laugh as I see this tall copper headed Adonis in a T-shirt, bare feet and PJ bottoms with a miniscule cowboy hat perched atop his head. "'Well that suits you. Where is Teddy's?" I ask him.

"I thought it looked pretty sexy on me. Thought I just might keep this one." He adjusts the hat on his head. "What do you think?"

"I think you've lost your mind," I tell him as I gather our things together to leave later this morning. "It does make your head look larger, almost normal size."

He walks over and picks me up by the waist, "Fuck you." He gives me a quick kiss and puts me down.

"We don't have time. The limo will be here in an hour. You sure are in a good mood. Buying expensive toys agrees with you."

"I like my new plane." He looks like a kid with a new bike. "I'm thinking about learning to fly it." he tells me.

"Why?" I ask him.

"Because I can," he shrugs. "I can fly a helicopter and they are much more difficult to fly than a plane. I can fly a glider, I can captain a boat. I can run a multi- billion dollar corporation. I even convinced you to marry me. Flying that thing should be a cinch."

"Well, if you want to. Go for it."

"Come here," he motions to me. " They just delivered these when they brought up the hats. Look at it, baby."

"What is it?" Christian lays out a bunch of specs and drawings on the bed.

"It is our new baby." Poor choice of words but I've never seen him so excited. "A Boeing BBJ 737. Seats 18 passengers with 2 flight attendant jump-seats, seven long range auxiliary fuel tanks, a crew lavatory and rest area, full service galley and pantry, a lounge and conference area, a guest room that will sleep three or convert into one double bed with a 21 inch flat screen and a lavatory. And the stateroom… our room, baby… queen size bed, 2 nightstands, wardrobe, lavatory with private shower, lounge area and a 42 inch flat screen." He's grinning from ear to ear and forgetting to take a breath. " An 80 million dollar plane with less than 60 hours logged, bought for the bargain basement price of 60.4 million dollars, baby, does it get any better?!"

I look at him in amazement, "You _have_ lost your mind." I stare at him. "BBJ must stand for Big Blow Job, because you look like you just got one."

"I have. This fucking thing makes me want to come just looking at it."

"How did you get it so cheap?" I roll my eyes," What am I saying? The damn thing cost 60 million friggin' dollars. You could buy a small country for that."

"Some stupid fucker who was running his company in the ground spent money he didn't have to buy it. He needed to unload it and I had the cash," he grins. "God, I just fucking love being me!"

"How much commission did Jeff make?" I ask him.

"Enough that he ought to suck my dick once a day for the rest of his life," he grins.

"Christian!" I give him a really big frowny face.

"God, I get an erection just looking at the pictures!" he beams.

"Come here. Come here, baby. Look at the redesign plans." He grabs me and pulls me over to the pictures he has.

"Christian I don't have time. I have to get our things packed," I resist him. But he wraps his arms around me.

"Don't worry about that. We can leave whenever we fucking well take a notion to." He nuzzles my neck.

"They are picking us up at 8:30. I need to get all this stuff packed." I nudge him. "Go away."

He grabs me and pulls me closer, "Seriously, I'm hard as a fucking rock and I need you." He takes the garments out of my hand and throws them on the floor while devouring my mouth. Then he picks me up and throws me on the bed and follows me as I giggle.

"Christian! What are you doing?" he crawls up and hovers over me and I wrap my arms around his neck and he falls on me consuming me, fully dressed.

Catching my breath, "Okay, okay. Better now?" I ask as I pull my panties and jeans back up and secure them. "That must be one sexy damn plane to get you so worked up."

"Yeah. I like it." he grins.

"Since you insist on having it remodeled, how long will that take?" I ask him and I start to pick up the clothes and repack the suitcase.

"Probably 4 to 6 months."

"That long? That means we won't even get it until next fall almost." I tell him.

"Yeah, but when we do get it, we're going on a long vacation." He rolls over on the bed and props on his elbow. "How about we go back to Europe for a while?"

"Sounds good to me. You've been wanting to go for some time now." Then I remember. "That's if I can get vacation time."

"Shit. I knew this job thing was a bad idea. Well, if old 'Pauly' won't give you any vacation, just quit. You don't need that job."

"Christian, I _want_ that job. I know I don't need it. Unless you decide to buy another expensive toy, then I might have to bring down a salary to keep us afloat."

"You can't put me in a bad mood today." he grins.

"Christian can I put a card and a bow on it and call it a birthday gift? Your birthday is in a few weeks and I need something for you. What do you get the man who just bought himself a big blow job?" I smile. "I like the name of that plane. BBJ. What does it really stand for? " I ask.

"Boeing Business Jet, smartass."

"Oh. I like Christian's big blow job better. Looks like we both got jobs this weekend."

"Did I just say you couldn't put me in a bad mood today? Scratch that," he frowns at me.

We've gotten packed or I have, and dressed and ready to leave. We get the call from Joseph that he is downstairs. When we get to the lobby, Taylor is waiting on us and stashes the luggage in the waiting car. We get back to the agency and meet with the design company who is going to take the plane for remodel and repaint. The repaint will be in different shades of gray starting with a dark shade on the bottom and then abstract lines of contrasting shades with the lightest on the top. 'GEH' will be emblazoned on the side.

The interior will be gutted and then redesigned and will be very contemporary, with white leather and fabrics, dark woods and grey granite for the counter tops. The floors in the dining, conference and lounge areas will be a gray wool carpet and the bedrooms will have a light hardwood. There will be a master stateroom and two bedrooms that will sleep 2 each either in twin beds or combined to make a full size bed. The loungers will convert to make sleepers that will sleep another six. There will be a wet bar and viewing area with flat screen. The 2 bedrooms will each have a 37" flat screen. The master will have a queen size bed, two nightstands, a wardrobe, en suite bath with vanity and shower. A sitting area with sofa and a 55" flat screen.

There will be a crew lavatory and rest area. Full galley and pantry. They even wanted to put in a baby grand in the lounge. Who knew you could do that on a plane? I nixed it. Crashing would be bad enough without being pinned under a baby grand piano. Christian can do without one for a few hours. The entire thing looks more like the interior of Escala than the interior of a plane. Oh, well. It makes him fifty shades of happy.

After Christian signs the contracts and transfers the money, we all board to fly back to Seattle. Stephen is in love with the thing. You'd think he owned it instead of Christian. Taylor is impressed, but he is more like me, it's a plane for heaven's sake. A bigger plane is just more of a security risk to him. We tell Jeff goodbye. Christian isn't far off because I think Jeff just might fall to his knees in front of him.

Christian takes my hand and puts it to his lips and kisses it as we taxi for takeoff. "Did you have a good weekend, Mrs. Grey?" he asks me.

I smile and nod, "Yes I did. Thank you. It was nice." I tell him. "I always enjoy getting away and having you all to myself."

"Baby, I'm always all yours."

"I know, but I like you being all mine without interruptions. Christian, thank you for being so supportive of me going back to work. I know you'd rather I not or at least that I go back to work for Grey Publishing."

"I still have trouble understanding why you won't go back to Grey Publishing" he asks.

"Because there is already somebody running Grey Publishing. I'm not going to boot someone out of a job just because I'm the owner's wife. That would make me really popular. And I can't work there as an editor. How in the world can the owner's wife report to someone who works for her husband? It would just never work. Besides I just want to edit. I have no desire to run a business. Running the thing is a totally different job from editing."

"I just hate that you are working for someone else. I don't like another man having any control over you," he explains.

"Baby, he has control over my work not me. You are the only man I allow to have any control over me. And I emphasize 'allow'. "

"Anastasia, I'm a smart man and I learned a long time ago that it is you who have control over me. You've been topping from the bottom from the day I met you," he gives me a sly grin.

I flash him a big smile, "Finally figured that out, did you?"

"You know I've been thinking about the gift for Mia and Ethan," he looks over at me.

"What did you come up with?" I ask him.

"Well Ethan is never going to get rich being a therapist and Mia dabbles in everything. What is it this week? Catering?" he asks. " I doubt she'll ever be able to stick to one thing long enough to make a go of it. I was thinking about giving them a house. At least that will give them a leg up to start out and I know Ethan will never be able to afford what Mia is accustomed to."

"Well. If you think so. You don't think Ethan might resent it?" I ask him.

"I don't really care if he resents it. I want my sister to have a good start."

"What about Kate and Elliott? I think all we gave them was a honeymoon and use of the jet."

"Well, actually, I've been thinking about signing the company that Elliott and I own over to him. I don't have time to fool with it and he's really learned a lot about management. The amount I invested is miniscule in comparison with GEH. He's earned it for all the work he's put into it."

"That's nice of you. I think Elliott and Kate would love that," I tell him. "But how are you going to give Mia and Ethan a house? Won't they want to pick out their own home?"

"Well, I guess we could give them a check or tell them to pick out what they want and we'll pay for it," he suggests.

"I suppose. I guess we could just give them a gift card and have 'house of your choice' put on it," I shrug. "You're a very thoughtful brother, Christian Grey."

"I'll be glad to see our munchkins. As busy as they keep us, I miss them when we're away from them," he sighs.

"Me, too." I smile up at him. "But I do like it when we can fool around and not have to worry that they are going to walk in on us." I pause for a moment. "Christian. I want to tell you again how sorry I am about what happened this weekend. I was just trying to be sexy and I thought that I'd turn the tables on you."

"Baby, you are sexy, you don't have to try. You keep me horny all the time and I love it that you like it as much as I do," he gives me a kiss on my forehead. "I'm just sorry that I was a shit about punishing you. I should have been able to tell that you weren't enjoying it."

"Christian , it's okay. You didn't hurt me and you asked if it was okay to punish me and I agreed."

"I know. But I should have known you weren't really in the mood when you didn't want to be spanked," he sweetly squeezes my hand. "Forced orgasm is a common form of discipline , but I should have never done that. I'm glad you told me that I had stepped over the line. I never want to do that to you."

"Well. I'm glad it all worked out. Things are always better when we talk about it," I tell him.

Several hours later we land back in Seattle. Taylor retrieves the SUV from the hanger where we secured it before we left. He does a security sweep and then loads the luggage as Christian talks to Stephen. We are finally on our way home to our children.

"Jason, I know you'll be glad to get back home, but I want to thank you for coming with us this weekend," I lean forward and tell him.

"Yes, Mrs. Grey. No problem. I will be glad to get back to Gail. I do miss her when I'm away."

"He's probably as horny as I am." Christian whispers over to me and gives me a wicked grin. " If I know Taylor, Gail had better get ready to brace herself."

I give him a swat on his arm and an admonishing look, "Just maybe it's Jason who will need to brace himself."

* * *

Finally, we arrive back at our driveway and pull through the large metal gate that secures the entrance to the property. Arriving at the house we pull into the garage and walk back into the house as Taylor unloads the luggage.

"Daddy!" I can hear Teddy scream as he launches himself at Christian.

Picking Teddy up, Christian gives him a big hug, "Hey big boy. Did you keep everything under control?"

"Yep. I tried, but Grace and Gail don't listen to me. They just do what they want," he tells his dad.

"Well, at least you tried. Where's Grace?" Christian asks.

Teddy shrugs, "I can't keep up with her." Teddy grins from ear to ear, "Did you remember my hat, dad?"

"I sure did, cowboy. When we get unpacked, I'll get it for you." Christian gives him a swat on his butt.

I lean over and give him a big kiss on his cheek, "I missed you sweetheart."

" I missed you too Mom." Christian puts him down.

Gail walks in with Grace in tow. Grace has a fit for her dad. Christian picks her up and gives her little smooching kisses against her cheek. "How's my girl?" he whispers in her ear.

"Good, daddy. I miss you."

"I missed you too, baby. I do believe you got prettier while I was gone."

Grace gives him a big grin and nods in agreement.

Christian hands her to me and I give her a huge hug and kiss. "Mmm. I missed you."

"Miss you mama." She gives me a huge hug back.

"You made it. How was Houston?" Gail asks.

"It was fun."

"Jason said you didn't get out much?" she gives me a sly grin.

"No we just enjoyed the peace and quiet. How was it around here?" I ask her.

"Just another weekend. Nothing eventful." She has a strange look on her face.

* * *

It's Tuesday morning and Christian is already in the shower and getting ready for work. I wake up my son and lay out his clothes for school. I meet Christian back in our room and he is almost dressed. Looking all CEO hot in his light gray suit pants and white shirt with a red tie and his black Italian loafers.

I find out what he wants for breakfast and let Gail know. Christian and Teddy eat and head to the door to leave; Christian to work and Teddy to school. Teddy enjoys the mornings he gets to ride to school with Christian. Sawyer picks him up in the afternoon, but he loves his mornings with his dad and Taylor.

"Have a good day at school. Remember just a couple of weeks and you're out for the summer." I give him a big kiss good bye.

"Thank you for my weekend, Mr. Grey. Don't work too hard today."

"I'll see you this evening. You girls have a good day." Christian gives me a quick good bye kiss.

I hate to do it, but we've been avoiding the nursery. I think I'll dive into it today. "Gail, I'm going to be upstairs for a while this morning."

"Okay, Ana. I'll go get Grace up and dressed."

I get into my jeans and a T-shirt and get my hair pulled back and my teeth brushed. I know I'm going to be going through the clothes and linens, so I take off my engagement ring and put it on the night stand. I love it, but it's so large it catches on everything.

I walk across the hall and stand in front of the door and take a deep breath as I grab the door knob. I close my eyes and turn the knob and step in the room. Opening my eyes I feel like I've been kicked in the gut. It's empty. Totally empty and bare down to the walls. Where is everything? What happened?

"Gail!" I call out. "Gail!"

"What is it?" I see her halt as she sees me in the empty room. "Ana. Mr. Grey didn't tell you, did he?"

"Didn't tell me what?" I can feel my eyes filling with tears.

"He had the room cleared while you were away in Houston." I can see her nervously wringing her hands.

"He did what?" I ask her.

"He didn't want you to have to deal with it, so he had the room cleared. He was supposed to tell you. I guess he didn't." she tells me.

"No he didn't."

"I didn't think it was a good idea, but there was no arguing with him," she tells me. "I asked him to please make sure that he told you."

"What did he do with it all?" I ask her.

"Well, he had the workers get rid of it. He said he didn't' want to take any chances that either of you would see any of it again. Ana. I'm so sorry. I wish he had asked you first, or at least told you what he was doing."

"Me too, Gail." I can feel the tears spilling out of my eyes. "I just wanted to wait until I was ready to do it. I wanted to do it myself." I wipe a few tears away. "Thank you. Gail. I'll speak to Mr. Grey about it when he gets home."

She leaves me and I close the door behind her, then sit in the floor in the middle of the room. It's all gone. Gone like my baby. It's like he never existed. Just wiped away. There is no reminder of him. I wanted to go through his little clothes and touch them once more before I gave them away. I lie on the carpet and just have a deep cleansing cry, before I take a vow to kill my husband.

I know Christian meant well, but he should have discussed it with me first. He had no right to do this without asking me about it. He and his control have stepped over a line this time. Even though he had my best interest at heart, he has gone too far.

I spend an hour or so just lying on the carpet, thinking and letting myself feel the grief. I finally get back up and decide to take another route today. I think I'll call Jose. I haven't talked to him in ages. I hope I still have his number.

Finding my phone I look through and find his cell number.

"Jose."

"Ana?" I hear his cheerful voice in my ear.

"Hey. How are you?"

"Long time no hear. How are things in Grey world?" he asks.

"Fine just fine. How are things in L.A.?" I ask him.

"Good, baby. Things are going great! I just had another showing and tons of commissions. Work is good."

"How about your personal life? Have you found a lady yet?" I ask.

"Ana, you know no one could ever hold a candle to you. But I have found someone special. In fact I'm bringing her up to see dad next week. We should get together and catch up."

"Well, actually I had something I wanted to ask you." I tell him.

"Shoot, baby. What is it?" he tells me.

"Do you remember those black and white pictures you made of me in college?" I ask him.

"I sure as hell do. My favorite subject. And Christian bought them all. I made a small fortune off of those, " he snickers.

"Well. I was wondering if you would be willing to do the same thing with Teddy and Grace. I'd like some big black and whites of the kids."

"I'd be honored. Do you want to do it while I'm there next week?" he asks.

"That would be perfect. When will you be up here?"

"We'll be getting in on Wednesday and staying through Monday. I could do it maybe Thursday or Friday."

"Oh, Jose, that's great." I tell him. "Call me when you have your plans finalized and we can work out a day and time."

"I'm looking forward to seeing you again, Ana. It's been a long time," he reminds me.

"I know. Too long. "

"You sound kind of down. Are you okay, babe?" he asks me.

"Yes. Yes I'm fine. It's just good talking to you." I tell him.

"You sure?" he asks.

"I'm sure. Call me when you know something."

"I will. Bye Ana."

"Good bye Jose."

I end the call and don't feel a lot better. I want the photos for Christian's birthday. It looks like it might just work out.

Walking back in to the bedroom, it looks like Myra has been in and cleaned. The bed is made and the bathroom cleaned. She really is working out well. I reach to put my engagement ring back on and it is missing. I know I left it on the nightstand. Shit where is it?

I check on the floor and look under the bed, but no ring. "Myra!" I call.

"Yes Mrs. Grey?" she is almost out of breath running from Teddy's room.

"Myra, when you made the bed, did you see my ring on the night stand?"

"Ring? No ma'am. I didn't see a ring." She looks perplexed.

"Okay. I had put my engagement ring on the nightstand earlier and now I can't find it. Would you keep an eye out for it?" I ask her.

"Sure thing, Mrs. Grey. But I sure haven't seen it." She leaves to finish up in Teddy's room.

That's weird. I know I left it on the nightstand. I trust Myra. I really have no thought that she would take it. I just can't figure out what happened. I get on my hands and knees and sweep the floor trying see if I can feel for it, but nothing. I just have to find it. This really isn't my day. It isn't even lunch yet and I've lost Sam's things and my engagement ring.

I walk down to Teddy's room. "Myra did you vacuum in our bedroom this morning?" I ask her.

"Yes, ma'am. I'm finished in there."

"Where is the vacuum?" She points to it. "I'm going to take the bag out and check to see if it accidentally got vacuumed up."

I take out the bag and walk downstairs to open it and go through it.

"Ana. What are you doing?" Gail asks.

"I can't find my engagement ring and I thought maybe it got vacuumed up. I'm checking the bag to see if it's here."

"Goodness. Where did you leave it?" she asks.

"On my night stand. Now it's gone. I've checked the floor and the bed and under the nightstand. I can't find it."

"You don't think that…"

"Oh, no. No I think it is somewhere. I probably left it somewhere else and just forgot. Keep an eye out for me will you?"

"Oh Gail. You remember the wedding is this Saturday. Do you have anything to wear? If not we can get something for you." I tell her my fingers knuckle deep in dust and crap from the vacuum bag.

"I've got something, but thank you."

"Okay. I really appreciate you going to watch the kids while Christian and I do attendant duties." I tell her.

"Well, Jason will be there anyway, so I really don't mind. It'll be fun watching Mia and Ethan finally get married." She smiles.

"Yes. Finally."

"Gail? Did they leave anything from Sam's room?" I ask.

She gives me such a pained look, "No, Ana. I'm so sorry. Teddy wanted a couple of the wall hangings and Grace had a fit for a stuffed toy, but Mr. Grey gave strict orders to get rid of all of it."

"Okay, " I nod. "I was just hoping there was something left. "I just wanted something…." I lose it and begin to cry, "…just something left of him to hold on to."

Gail comes over and puts her arm around me. "Oh, Ana. I'm so, so sorry. Mr. Grey really had good intentions, he just doesn't know how to carry them out sometimes."

"I know Gail. I just wish he'd ask me before he does things. He should have talked to me about it first. And now I've lost my engagement ring on top of it. It's not turning out to be a very good day."

"We'll find the ring, Ana. It's so big it can't be too hard to find." She tells me.

I give her a little laugh as I wipe my face, "I know. It's ridiculous. That's why I have to take it off if I'm going to do anything. It's so big it gets caught on everything." I tell her. "Just to let you know, I'm really pissed off at Christian, so things may be a little frosty for a while. Tell Jason to be prepared. Mr. Grey isn't going to be in a good mood."


	11. Chapter 11

_**Fifty Shades…Full Circle**_

** Chapter 11 **

I hear Christian walk into the bedroom. I had no idea it was time for him to be home. I'm in the bathroom with a screwdriver tightening a towel rack that has become loose.

"Ana?" I hear him. "Ana baby, where are you?" He walks into the bathroom loosening his tie and unbuttoning his shirt. "What the fuck are you doing?" he almost looks horrified.

"I'm tightening this stupid towel rack. What does it look like I'm doing?" I snap at him as I force a screw into the wall.

"I can see that. Why are you doing it?" he asks.

"Because it's loose. Why else?"

"But there are people who can do that for you," he constantly finds ways to remind me I'm rich.

"Christian I realize that but I can do it, and it is easier to just get a screwdriver and do it myself than to try to get someone out here to do it for me." I tell him. "Besides, I like doing things myself." I'd always been able to take care of myself and I liked that I didn't have to depend on anyone to do things for me.

"How do you know how to do it?" he asks as he peers over to see what I'm doing.

"I haven't been rich all my life. Before we got married, I did quite a few things for myself. I haven't lost the ability to do it just because when I married you the money came with the deal." I sneer at him. "Besides, did you forget I worked at a hardware store?"

"You seem out of sorts. What's wrong?" he notes as he glares over at me.

"It hasn't been a good day. You might want to leave it at that," I tell him still attending to my project.

"I'm sorry, baby. What went wrong today?" he asks. He has no idea of the shit storm that's about to hit him.

"Well. First of all I can't find my engagement ring," I inform him after I stop to look over at him.

"Where is it?"

"If I knew that it wouldn't be lost." I glare at him.

"You know what I mean. Where did you last see it?" he asks as he kicks his shoes off and slides out of his slacks.

"I put it on the night stand this morning and when I went to get it….it just wasn't there."

"I've been wanting to get you a bigger one anyway. Don't worry about it." he tells me.

"That's how you fix everything isn't it?" I snap my fingers in the air, "Just buy another one. First of all I don't want another one." I tell him as I walk over to stand in front of him. " I want the one you gave me when we got engaged. Second, I don't want a bigger one. That's why it's missing. It is so large I have to take it off to do anything and now it's gone missing."

"What did you have to do that you couldn't wear it?" he asks.

"Therein lies the big issue, Christian." I tell him. "I took it off so I could work on cleaning out Sam's room."

He freezes and closes his eyes. " Shit."

"Yes, Christian. Shit!" I glare at him. "What the fuck were you thinking?" I snap at him.

"Baby, I didn't want you to have to deal with it," he tries to look apologetic.

"I don't care why you did it. You should have asked me first. You had no right to do that." I get right up in his face.

"You're upset?" he looks puzzled.

"Damn right I'm upset, Grey."

"But I don't understand. Why?" he asks. "I thought you'd be glad not to have to deal with it."

"Christian. I wanted to do it myself." I try to explain to him. "I needed to deal with it. I just needed time to do it. I had to wait until I was ready to part with his things."

"But, I thought you were just putting it off because you didn't want to do it," he tells me.

"That's the problem. You thought! You didn't ask." He can tell I furious with him.

"Baby it needed to be done. I just got it done for you."

"Christian, I don't care if the stuff sat there for 10 years. So fucking what?" I raise my voice to him. Something I rarely ever do. " I needed to go through his things. I needed to touch them and hold them and be able to remember him. There were things I wanted to keep. You can't just erase the fact that he existed. Cleaning out the room won't make him go away. "

"Ana. I couldn't walk by that room one more time and know what was behind that door," he points in the direction of Sam's room and I can see the tears glistening on his eyelashes. " I needed for it to be gone."

"Then why didn't you talk to me about it?" tears are spilling down my face and I'm trembling all over. "Why didn't you tell me how you felt. We could have done it together. You should have at least given me a chance."

"I did it with the best of intentions," he looks like a hurt little boy.

"Christian, you do everything with the best of intentions. But you can't undo this. Everything is gone. The damage is done. You can't fix it this time."

"Are you going to leave?" he looks like a ghost.

Stopping dead in my tracks, "I can't believe you just asked me that. Why would I leave?" I ask.

"Because I've fucked up."

"Yes, Christian. You have fucked up."

"I've fucked up so bad you can't love me anymore?" he asks.

"Who said anything about not loving you?" He's just being ridiculous. "I'll always love you. I just don't like you very much right now." I try to explain to him. He looks like a whipped puppy. "Christian stop it with that 'I don't deserve to be loved' shit. It's insulting. You know better than that. Besides this isn't about you. This is about what you've done. What you took away from me."

"Insulting?"

"Yes. I'm tired of hearing it. I love you. When you start talking about not being worthy of love it makes me feel like what I feel for you isn't worth anything. Like it's not good enough. We've been married for almost eight years. Why else would I stay with you if I didn't love you? You have two children that adore you, so don't start with that shit." I'm almost spiting my words at him.

"Well. I can see you're in a foul mood. I think I'll go see my children who 'adore' me," he turns to walk out of the room. "Continue with your fucking towel rack Miss Fixit."

Christian leaves and I continue with my repair project. I'm so pissed off that I take it out on the poor towel rack almost forcing the screw through the wall. After I finish I get cleaned up for dinner and walk down stairs. I'm not sure I can even sit at the dinner table with him, I'm so mad. He always thinks he is in control of everything. Like he doesn't have to answer to anyone about anything. He seems to think there are no consequences for anything he does. His money and power may insulate him elsewhere but inside these walls it doesn't count for shit.

"Gail. Can I help you with anything?" I ask on arriving in the kitchen.

"No. Dinner is almost ready. Poached salmon with dill sauce and buttered new potatoes and sautéed green beans with slivered almonds."

"Mmm. Sounds good." I give her a forced smile.

"Why don't you go visit with Mr. Grey and the kids while I finish up?" she tells me. "I'll call everyone when it's ready."

"I don't really want to visit with Mr. Grey right now." I remind her as I pour myself a cool glass of wine.

"Ohh. That bad?" she asks.

"Worse." I tell her as I lean against the kitchen counter and swirl the wine in my mouth.

"Ana, he meant well." Poor Gail is so fond of Christian. She always tries to find some way of defending his actions. She knows how messed up he can be and how hard he tries to get past it.

"I understand that, Gail. He always means well." I tell her. "It's not a good enough excuse. Not this time. He needs to learn to talk to me before he does whatever he wants in the name of good intentions."

I take my wine and walk into the family room where Christian is playing with the children. He is on the floor and with both of them on him, squealing with delight at the chance to wrestle with him. Teddy is on his chest trying to restrain him and Grace has her arms around his neck trying to choke him. I sort of hope she succeeds.

He looks up grinning at me as I sit on the sofa. "Did you bring me one of those?" he asks about the wine.

"Nope."

"Can you get me one? I'm sort of busy right now," he asks as Grace tries to tighten her hold on his neck.

"Get it yourself," I tell him. He rolls his eyes and mutters something under his breath.

I do love watching Christian and the kids playing. They love each other so much. He absolutely adores them and they adore him. That's so sexy. He's so sexy. Even when I'm angry at him he still gets my heart racing. No matter what is happening between us, we always have that electricity, that need for each other. I'd fuck his eyeballs out if I weren't so damn mad at him.

Gail calls dinner and we all move to the dining room. I help Grace get in her booster chair and get her plate served and her food cut up for her before I sit down at my place. Christian helps Teddy get food on his plate. Teddy takes one look at it and makes a face, "Fish! Yuck!"

"Stop it son. That's not polite. Gail went to a lot of trouble to fix dinner for us," he admonishes Teddy.

"She could have gone to a lot of trouble to fix hamburgers," Teddy pouts. "Do I have to eat it?"

"Yes. You do," his dad tells him in no uncertain terms.

Teddy firmly folds his arms and pouts staring at the salmon on his plate.

"Teddy, honey, just try it," I tell him. "If you don't like it you don't have to eat it."

Christian glares over at me, "I just told him he has to eat it."

"Whatever, Christian." I shake my head and sigh.

I notice Grace is devouring her meal. She hasn't learned to dislike something just because it's different yet. "Look at Grace. She's eating it. It's good." Christian tells Teddy.

Gail brings Christian a glass of wine and tops mine off. "Thank you, Gail. The meal is wonderful," I tell her.

"Teddy? Do you not like it?" Gail asks. "Do you want me to get you something else, sweetheart?"

"No he doesn't. He's going to eat the salmon." Christian breaks in talking to Gail, but looking at Teddy.

"Yes, Mr. Grey." Gail makes a quick retreat.

"But I don't like it." I can see his little eyes welling up.

"Baby, just put one bite in your mouth. Just give it a try," I beg him.

"Ana!" Christian snaps at me.

"Yelling at him won't help," I snap back.

"I'm handling this," he stares over at me.

"Not very well," I mutter under my breath at him. "Teddy eat your potatoes and beans. You liked those."

"Teddy you will eat the fucking fish." Christian tells him.

"Christian!" I gasp. I have no idea how to ever break him of talking like that in front of the children. This is the one part of his life he just can't seem to be able to control. I don't think he even wants to control it.

"Are you and Mom fighting?" Teddy asks his dad as his eyes dart back and for the between us.

"No, we are not!" Christian says sternly.

"Baby, it's okay. Daddy and I are having a discussion about something. It's nothing for you to worry about." I try to tell him.

Christian and I finish our dinner in relative silence, only conversing with the children. Teddy finally relents and tries a bite of the Salmon. He seems to like actually it, but the Christian side of him prevails and he still refuses to eat it, just on principal. I think Christian is tired of arguing with him and he lets him off the hook after just trying it.

After getting Grace bathed and ready for bed, I get Teddy bathed and in his pajamas. Christian comes in and reads him a story while I go read to Grace for a while. It's a school night and naturally, Teddy argues about his bed time. His theory is that he only has a couple of weeks of school left so, it's close enough that he should be able to stay up. Christian shoots a big hole in that theory and makes him go to bed. I have finished getting Grace down and claim the tub first. Christian walks in and I'm up to my neck in water and bubbles, my head leaned back and my eyes closed trying to erase the day from my mind.

"May I get in with you?" he sheepishly asks.

"I'd rather you not," I tell him without opening my eyes.

"Well do you mind if I take a fucking shower?" he snaps.

I shrug, "Do what you want."

"What I want is to spank the hide off of you," he mutters.

"I heard that," I snap at him.

"Good!" he barks as he pulls his T-shirt over his head and slams it to the floor.

I watch as he unzips his jeans and jerks them off along with his boxers. He's making every muscle in his body flex and he knows I'm watching, though I'm pretending not to. I hate it when I'm mad at him. I hate that he makes me mad at him. It would be so easy to just let him in the tub, but I can't let my physical need for him over ride my desire to remain pissed at him.

He stands naked in front of me and holds his arms out. Arguing must be arousing to him as he is rock hard and pointing north. "Sure you don't want any of this?" he cocks his head and asks.

I look over at him. "I'll pass," I say dryly.

"Fucking hell," he growls at me.

"And watch your language in front of my children!" I yell at him as he turns the water on in the shower.

I can hear him muttering to himself as he showers. I can't hear what he's saying, but I have an idea what it's about.

I get out and dry off then slip into my gown. After I get the duvet turned down, I slide in between the sheets and Christian dries off then slides in next to me. He's naked and I can feel his erection against my back as he snuggles up close to me. His warm breath settles on my skin as he gently kisses my shoulder.

"Christian!"

"What baby ?" he whispers.

"Stop it."

"Well fuck it," is his response as he releases me and turns over punching his pillow. "I still don't know why you're so pissed."

I turn over and sit up. "You just don't get it do you?"

Christian sits up as well. "Evidently I don't, so please enlighten me," he snaps.

"Christian. I need for you to talk to me before you do major things like clearing out Sam's room." I try to explain. "I wanted to do it myself. I needed to touch his things one more time. I needed to be able to let them go. When I walked into that nursery today, it was like someone punched me in the gut. It was like he never existed. Like you tried to wipe him away."

"Baby, I needed for the things to be gone. I need to move on. Every time I walked by that closed door, I knew what was behind it and it broke my heart. It's not that I'm trying to forget him, I could never forget him. I love him. I just need to have the constant reminder gone." He sounds exasperated as he rubs his hands over his face.

"Then why didn't you talk to me first?" I begin to cry. "Why didn't you tell me how you felt?"

"Evidently it's because I'm a thoughtless bastard," he runs his hand through his hair.

"Why do you always do that?" I ask through my tears.

"Do what?" he lets out a huge sigh.

"Always demean yourself when we argue."

"Fuck! I don't know." He shoves his hand through his hair again. He may be bald by the time this is over.

"Did it ever cross your mind that instead of there being something wrong with you or that you're fucked up that there is the remote possibility that maybe you're just in the wrong or at fault?"

He stops and thinks for a moment, "No. No ,not really."

"Heaven forbid Christian Grey could possibly be wrong about something." I throw my hands up.

He turns over and pulls the sheet up. "Just go to sleep. I'm tired of arguing with you."

I smack him on the back of his head. "What the fuck was that for?" He growls and sits up again.

"Don't dismiss me."

"I'm not dismissing you. I'm tired. I have to go to work in the morning. I need to get some sleep," he explains.

"Oh, you can sit up all night working, but you can't sit up and talk to me. Is that it?" I snap.

"You got it! At least if I'm working I'm doing something productive. This is utterly fucking ridiculous. Besides I got the distinct impression you didn't want to talk to me," he barks at me.

"I don't!" I find myself yelling.

"Then leave me the fuck alone and let me go to sleep," he turns back over. "And don't you dare smack me again!" he roars while he looks over and points his finger at me.

"Or what?" I almost dare him.

"Ana. Shut up!" he snaps at me.

"Don't talk to me like that." I snap back.

"Ana. You are getting seriously close to crossing a line," he seems to caution me.

"What line? I didn't know you had a line."

"Drop it!" he warns me in a rather loud stern tone.

I can feel the tension building between us. Fighting is almost like foreplay. We're both so worked up that I can almost feel the electricity from his body. His breathing is ragged and his muscles are tense. My body is on edge and I think I could explode any moment. I just want him inside me and try to fuck all the anger out of both of us.

"What if I don't want to drop it?" I throw back at him.

He tosses off the sheet and turning over he throws himself on top of me grabbing my hands and pinning me underneath him.

"Then I'll fuck you senseless," he whispers. His eyes are burning into mine and our ragged breathing matches our racing heat beats. "You're driving me fucking crazy, Anastasia." He lowers his head and his mouth finds mine. His tongue is ravenous and I want him to devour me.

I can feel his erection on my thighs, but I keep my legs clinched together. His knee tries to part me, but I hold tight. "Open your fucking legs." he growls against my neck.

"No." I spit out glaring into his gray eyes.

"I. Said. Open. Your. Fucking. Legs." He tries again to gain entrance to me.

"Not a chance." I glare at him.

"Don't make me force you," he warns. "I will fuck you."

"You wouldn't dare," I spit out.

I can feel him relax. "No…. No, I wouldn't force you." He rolls off of me.

"Ana. I can't do this anymore tonight. I'm tired. I'm confused. I'm horny," he sighs. "Please just let me go to sleep and I promise, we'll talk tomorrow night."

"We have dinner at your parent's tomorrow night." I remind him.

"Fuck. I forgot about that," he sighs. "We'll talk after. I promise. And I promise to listen to you. We'll put the kids to bed and sit down in the quiet and talk about it."

"Can I trust you to keep your word? " I acquiesce.

"Ana. You can always trust me about anything. You know that." He looks drained.

"Well, don't forget. I'm holding you to it."

"No, baby. I won't forget. I promise," he tells me, then he kisses my hair and rolls over pulling the sheet up.

I remain on my side with my back to him and pull my cover up to my neck. I'm so worked up my heart is beating out of my chest. Before I can nod off, I hear a little knock at the door. I get up and go to our door and open it. There stands Teddy in his little pajamas and a bewildered look on his face. He looks like he is lost and going to cry. I kneel down to his eye level. "What's wrong sweetheart?" I pull him into my arms.  
"I came to see what happened," he says.

"What do you mean?" I ask. "Nothing has happened."

"But I heard you and daddy all the way in my bedroom," he tells me.

"Oh, baby. Daddy and I are just disagreeing. Like when you and Grace disagree." I kiss him. "It's okay. I'm sorry if we woke you up."

"I didn't go to sleep yet." I can see tears in his eyes and he's twisting his little fingers, "Don't be mad."

Christian has gotten up and is behind me, "We aren't mad son. Mom and I just disagree on something and we're talking about it." Christian picks him up and we take him back to bed. Christian kisses his cheek over and over as he presses him to his chest.

"Can I sleep with you?" he asks. I say 'Yes', and Christian says 'No' at the same time. I glare at my husband.

"Don't worry about anything , son. Mommy and I are fine. We were just talking too loud." Christian tries to explain to him as he sits on the edge of Teddy's bed.

"Are you sure?" he asks. "Are you going to get a defort?"

"What?" Christian asks.

"Bobby Jessup's parents talked loud all the time and they got a defort and now they don't live together anymore and he has two mommies and one daddy and two birthdays and two Christmases."

"You mean divorce." Christian snickers. "No, son. Mommy and I aren't getting a divorce. Mommy and I love each other very much. We would never get a divorce. I'm sorry you heard us arguing."

"Will you get grounded for yelling?" he asks.

"I doubt it." Christian tells him.

" Hey. You need to get to sleep. You have school tomorrow," I tell him.

Christian pulls his covers up and gives him a kiss. "Go to sleep, son. We love you very much."

I bend down and give him a kiss. "Don't worry about anything, sweetie. Everything is fine. You go to sleep now."

"Okay." He gives us a little smile.

We turn out his light and close his door and walk back to our room. "I feel awful he heard us." I tell Christian.

"Well maybe we should make up," he gives me a big sly grin.

"Forget it." I slip back into bed and pull the covers up.

"Well, shit!" is all he has to say.

I wake up to the sound of the shower. Christian must be up. I go to the bathroom and relieve myself, then wash my face. As I am putting moisturizer on my face, Christian gets out of the shower and gives my cheek a kiss as he wraps his towel around his waist. I glare at him.

He puts his hands up, palms out, "Okay, still pissed," he says.

"What do you want for breakfast?" I ask him.

"I don't give a shit. Whatever," he says.

"Okay. I'm going to get Teddy up." I walk to Teddy's room and sit on the bed next to him. Running my hand through his hair I wake him up. "Wake up baby. Time to get ready for school." I kiss him on his forehead.

He rubs his little eyes. "Okay, Mom." He looks up at me. "Did you and dad make up?"

"We're fine Teddy." I run my hand through his hair. "I laid your clothes out. Hurry up so you can eat with your dad. What do you want for breakfast?"

"Chicken noodle soup?" he asks.

"Soup?"

"Yeah. Can I have soup?" he smiles.

"I guess. If it's what you want. As long as you have something in your tummy when you leave for school." I tell him. "I'll see you down stairs, baby."

"Good morning Gail." I tell her as I pour a cup of hot water for tea.

"Good morning, Ana. How is everything this morning?" she asks.

"Shit storm continues. No clearing in sight. Is Jason on high alert?" I ask.

"I warned him. What does everyone want for breakfast?"

"Christian said, and I quote 'Shit I don't care. Whatever', and Teddy wants chicken noodle soup."

"Okay. One western omelet with toast and fruit and bowl of soup coming up," she smiles.

Christian and Teddy come down the stairs together and make it to the breakfast counter in the kitchen. Gail puts Christian's breakfast in front of him and then Teddy's bowl of soup in front of him.

"What are you eating, son?" Christian asks.

"Shoop." Teddy says as he sucks in a noodle and soup dribbles down his chin.

Christian shakes his head. I smile over at Teddy as I sip my hot tea. Christian catches my eye and I quickly lose the smile. Christian's face hardens and he finishes his breakfast.

"The car's ready, Mr. Grey." Taylor walks in and announces.

"I'll let you know when I'm ready to leave." Christian growls.

I can see Taylor brace himself. I want to chastise Christian for his tone with Taylor, especially in front of Teddy, but I hold my tongue, because I know it will only make it worse. My God why do I love him so much. He can be such an ass at times. How the hell does someone who is so kind and so generous be so rude and short with people. He verbally whips Taylor then treats him like family. Well I just answered my own question. He verbally abuses his family as well.

Heaven help me I love him. I miss him when we fight. I miss his touch. I miss holding him at night and kissing him and making love with him. I miss his arms and his soft whispers in my ear. But he can make me angrier than any other human I know. Maybe it's because we feel so intensely about each other that we can get so angry. We fight with as much passion as we make love.

"Well. Wipe your mouth and lets hit the road. Don't want to be late for school." Christian hands him a napkin and Teddy wipes the soup off of his chin. Teddy jumps down from the stool at the breakfast counter and Christian stops him. "Whoa. Come here," he kneels down to tuck the shirt tail of Teddy's Polo shirt into his khaki pants.

All three men head out the door to leave for the day. "Don't forget we have to be at your parent's house at six this evening." I tell Christian. "I'll be home in time to leave." Christian gives me a very chaste kiss on the cheek and exits the door.

I remind Gail that we have a wedding planning dinner this evening at Grace and Carrick's, so she and Jason can have the evening off. I still haven't found my ring. I keep looking down at my hand and it isn't there. I have no idea where it could be. My mind keeps going to Myra. I completely trust her, but she is the only person that had access to it. I can't confront her unless I have some evidence that she may have taken it.

Christian's grandmother crosses my mind, but I'll wait until after this wedding to call her. I have too much to do right now. The last thing I need is for him to get wind of it while we are at each other's throats. Well, I'm at his throat.

The day passes as usual until time to get ready to go to my in-laws. I get a bath and dressed. Gail helps me get the kids dressed and ready to go. We are all waiting in the family room for Christian to get home. It's past time to leave and he still isn't here. All of a sudden I hear Christian walk in the front door. "Let's go. We're late," he bellows. The kids and I scurry to the door. Taylor has pulled my A8 around for us and the kids and I head out for the car. I get Grace strapped in her car seat and Christian gets Teddy buckled in. In a cloud of dust we pull out of the driveway.

"You're running late." I look over at Christian.

"Couldn't be helped," he mutters.

"Okay. Well we shouldn't be too late," I tell him.

We make the thirty minute drive in veritable silence, only responding to the kids.

When we pull up at his parent's home, everyone else has already arrived. We get the kids out and rush to the front door. Christian knocks as he opens the door and we clamber through it. Grace and Carrick meet us and Christian apologizes for us being tardy explaining that he had an unexpected late meeting, which is more than he told me.

Teddy immediately finds Simon and Trevi and they take off at a run through the house. Carrick offers us a glass of wine as we find the rest of the family in the den waiting for dinner to be served. Everyone exchanges their 'hellos' as we get our wine and settle down from the mad rush to get here.

I scoot in next to Kate and Mia on the sofa and Christian stands over with Elliott and Ethan discussing something that Elliott is getting a kick out of. Christian is rolling his eyes and shaking his head.

"How are things?" Kate asks.

"They're okay. I guess. I lost my engagement ring." I tell them.

"Oh, my gosh! What happened?" Mia gushes.

"It's so damn big I have to take it off when I do things around the house. I took it off and put it on the night stand. When I went back to get it, it was just gone," I tell them.

"Do you think someone took it?" Mia asks.

"I really don't want to think that. I really hope it just fell on the floor or that I left it somewhere other than the nightstand and forgot about it."

"Is Christian angry?" Kate asks.

"No. Not about that. As usual his solution is just to buy a bigger one." I shake my head.

"You said not about that. Is he angry about something?" Kate wants to know.

"We are having a bit of a disagreement right now."

"About what?" Mia pushes.

I hesitate to say anything, but I know Mia will just push the issue and Kate will end up asking about it later. "While we were in Houston last weekend, Christian had Sam's room cleaned out without telling me. It hurt my feelings. I'm a little irritated with him right now."

"Insensitive bastard." Kate agrees looking over at Mia. "Sorry Mia, but he can be sometimes."

"I swear. My brother can be so dimwitted sometimes. He probably just didn't think about how it would affect you." Mia adds, always Christian's defender.

"Well. I know why he did it. I just want him to start discussing things like that with me."

"Oh, Kate. Not to change the subject, but Jose is coming into town next week. Want to get together and have drinks and catch up?"

"Jose? Wow. I haven't heard from him in ages." Her face lights up. "What's he doing in town?"

"Actually, he's going to see his dad, but I have a secret project I'm involving him in and he'll be in town next Thurs or Friday. He's going to let me know which day when he works it out."

"Great! What secret project?" she asks.

"I was just going to ask that," Mia chimes in.

"Please don't say anything. It's for Christian's birthday." I ask them.

"My lips are sealed." Mia promises.

"Well, do you remember those large black and whites Jose took of me in school and he had them in that first gallery showing?" I ask Kate.

"Sure as hell do. Christian almost went nuclear. Bought all of them as well as I remember," she says.

"I'm going to have Jose take some of the kids and frame them to match those and give them to him for his birthday. I just have to find a way to get it done without him finding out."

"Oh. I like that. How you going to keep 007 from finding out?" she asks.

"I can manage to get them done, I think. I just have to get the kids to keep their little mouths shut about it." I tell them. "I think Teddy is old enough to cooperate, but I'm not so sure about Grace."

"Can you drug her?" Kate snorts.

"Sometimes I feel like it."

Grace calls dinner and we all walk to the dining room to sit down. "If this family gets any bigger, we are going to need a larger dining room and table." Grace announces as we all scramble to our seats.

Mia beams over at Ethan and he beams back at her. Then she flashes me a huge grin. Shit! I'll bet she's pregnant. She just has that look. And that grin on her face as she stares over at Ethan. I give her an inquisitive look and she returns it with a little nod as she puts her index finger quickly to her lips.

Damn. It's a good thing they're getting married in three days. Wonder if Grace and Carrick know? I doubt it. Christian better give them a big house.

After dinner I corner Mia in the hall. "Mia Grey. Do you want to explain anything to me?" I ask.

"Shh. Please don't say anything. I just found out last week." She grabs both of my hands and squeezes them.

"Have you seen a doctor yet?" I ask

"No. I just did one of those home tests, but it was positive." She is beaming.

"How about Ethan? Have you told him?"

"Of course! We're so excited. Please keep it under your hat for a while." She begs me. "I don't want to be a cliché walking down the aisle."

"I will. I'm so happy for you, baby." I give Mia a big hug. "This is a good thing, right?"

"Yes. Ethan and I have been together so long. It's not like we need time to get to know each other first."

"Good. Let me know if I can do anything, okay?" I run my hand over her hair and she nods.

Well. This will certainly make Christian happy. His unwed, pregnant sister.


	12. Chapter 12

_**Fifty Shades…Full Circle**_

**Chapter 12**

We have finished our family dinner and discussed all the loose ends and hopefully are ready for this wedding on Saturday. Christian picks up Grace and I corral Teddy as we head for the door. It's a school night, so we need to get the kids home and Mr. Grey and I need to have a talk. We are almost to the car and Grace comes running out of the front door,"Wait. Christian Wait."

"Christian. Your mother is calling you." I tell him.

"I can hear her. What does she want?" he asks.

"Well turn around and ask her." Grace finally catches up with us and she is waving a small object in her hand.

"Wait, wait. Grace forgot her little purse." Grace hands it to 'little' Grace, "Here you go precious. You must learn to keep up with your purse if you are going to carry one." She kisses her cheek and gives her a sweet smile.

"Thank you mother." Christian gives his mother a quick peck on the cheek. Then he straps Grace into her car seat. He waves to everyone,"See all of you Friday night."

"Don't forget little brother," Elliott yells at Christian and throws him a thumbs up and a big grin.

We are finally in the car and pulling away from the house, "What the hell does she need a purse for?" Christian asks.  
"What?"

"Grace. Why does she need a purse?" he restates his question.

"It's just a little girl thing. I got it for her to take to the wedding. She was having a fit for me to go ahead and give it to her and I didn't see any harm in letting her go ahead and have it."

"What could she possibly put in it?" he asks. "Her rabbit won't fit and that's all she cares about."

"She has a couple of tissues and a Chapstick I believe." I tell him. "What did you think she was carrying around, her cell phone and a diaphragm?"

"That's not funny." He gives me a sideways glare.

"By the way, speaking of diaphragms, your sister is pregnant," I casually tell him. I'm so glad I could be the one to deliver that zinger.

He slowly looks over at me, "What?" I can see him beginning a slow burn.

"Yep." I nod my head. "But don't say anything. No one knows but me and now you. It's a secret."

"I'll kill the little Kavanaugh shit." He puts a death grip on the steering wheel.

Smirking over at him, "I thought you'd take it well."

"How did that happen?" he asks.

"From what I understand it all started with a sneeze. Oh Christian for heaven's sake. They are getting married Saturday and they've been together almost eight years. What did you think they've been doing, playing Scrabble?"

"I just don't like it." I can see he is upset. "She's my little sister."

"Well, if it hadn't happened already, it was bound to Saturday night. Had you planned to send a chaperone with them on their honeymoon? " I ask him.

He nods, "If necessary. Yes."

"Grace, baby. God help you. You don't have a chance." I look back at my little girl in her car seat and shake my head.

By the time we get home, it's fairly late and time for the kids to go to bed, in fact Grace is asleep in her car seat. Christian carefully extricates her from the car and carries her in over his shoulder. We are able to get her to bed without waking her. I'm helping Teddy get a bath and into his pajamas.

"Mom?" he asks." Can I wear my cowboy hat to Aunt Mia's wedding?"

"No sweetheart. I don't think so. Hold still." I try to clean his ears with the wash rag.

"Oww." He scrunches up his face. "But why not?" he whines.

"Only J.R. Ewing could get away with that."

"Who's Jar Ooing?" he asks as I towel his hair.

"J.R. Ewing. He was a character on a TV show way before your time. He always wore a cowboy hat. Stetson, I believe." I tell him as I buff his head with a towel.

"He was on a TV show?"

"Uh ,huh. It took place in Texas. Come here and put your bottoms on." I hold out his PJ bottoms for him to step in to.

"Why do I have to wear pajamas?" he asks as I pull his bottoms up.

"To keep you warm and cover you up." I tell him.

"But daddy doesn't wear any."

"He does sometimes." I tell him. I can't tell him it's because daddy needs to be ready to jump me at a moment's notice and pajamas would slow him down.

"Then can I sleep without pajamas?" he asks.

"When you get to be a big boy then you can decide to sleep without pajamas, but little boys wear them. End of discussion."

" Okaaay. What do I have to do at the wedding?" he asks as I hand him his pajama top.

"Here you go. You don't have to do anything. Just be quiet and watch. Then after they are pronounced married, there is a party and dinner."

"Why do I have to go with Gail? Can't I go with you and dad?"

"You sure have a lot of questions tonight." I tell him as I help button up his pajama top. "Because your dad and I are in the wedding and have to stand up front with Aunt Mia and Uncle Ethan. You need to sit with Gail and Grace until the ceremony is over. Then you can sit with your dad and me to have dinner and cake."

"There's cake?" his eyes get huge.

"Yes, baby. There will be cake."

"And ice cream?"

"No ice cream. Just cake and dinner. Hop in bed." I hold out his cover as he slides up in the bed.

"Where's dad?"

"I think he's doing a little work. He'll be up in a minute." I sit on the edge of his bed and pull his covers up.

"Daddy works a lot," he complains and gives me a big pout.

"Yes he does sweetie. Daddy works an awful lot. "

"Why does he work so much?" he asks.

"Well, daddy runs his company and he has lots of people who depend on him to take care of things. That means he has to work very hard sometimes."

"Why does Daddy run the company?"

"Because he owns the company. He started it and built it up and he has to take care of it. I'll send him up in a minute. Any more questions Master Grey?"

"No I'm done."

"Okay then. Sleep tight." I kiss my sweet boy's little head and turn out his light.

* * *

Walking through the house, I turn out the lights downstairs. I stop at Christian's office door and he is pounding away on his laptop. The light from the screen is reflecting on his computer glasses. I can see by the reflection he is reviewing spreadsheets. Sometimes when I look at him my heart just swells, then he stomps on it a few times putting it back in its proper place a little worse for the wear.

"Christian?" I hate to interrupt him.

"Yep." He doesn't break his stare with the screen or his concentration.

"When you get to a stopping place, can you go up and say good night to Teddy?" I ask him.

"Sure." He continues to stare at the laptop. " Give me just a minute."

Finally looking up at me, "Okay. Finished." He takes off his glasses and leans back in his chair and rubs his eyes.

"What was Elliott giving you a thumbs up for?" I walk into the office and sit in the chair across from his desk.

Christian shakes his head and looks disgusted. "He's trying to make me go to the bachelor party for Ethan on Friday night."

"Don't you want to go?"

"They're just going to drink and knowing Elliott, there will be some form of partially dressed women there. Not really my type of affair."

"But, Ethan is going to be your sister's husband and the father of your niece or nephew. Couldn't you make an effort to just go for a little while?"

"You want me to go and socialize with a bunch of drunks and strippers?"

"Well, I know you won't get drunk. And you know I'll castrate you if mess around with the strippers, so what's the harm?"

"Castrate?" he asks.

"Yes." Staring directly into his gray eyes. " I believe it's a procedure that involves cutting your balls off."

"Ouch." he makes a pained face.

"I'm going up to get a bath. Come see me after you say goodnight to Teddy."

"In the tub?" he smiles.

"No." I shake my head. " Not in the tub. Not yet." I stand up to leave. "I've gotten the lights and set the alarm."

"Okay. I'll be in shortly," he tells me. "Ana?"

I stop and turn around, "Yes. Christian?"

"I love you," he looks so worried.

"I know. I love you, too."

"Can we fix this?" he asks.

I nod. "I think so. I just need some time to get over it and let things settle down. I'll see you upstairs."

I have my gown on and I'm leaving the bathroom and turning out the light, Christian appears with a bottle of wine and two flutes. He holds them up at shoulder height, "Ready to talk?" he asks.

"Getting me drunk won't help you know," I'm rubbing lotion into my hands as I walk over to the sofa and sit down. Christian meets me on the sofa and pours two glasses of wine handing me one of them. He snuggles back into the sofa and raises his glass to me, "Shoot."

"You want me to start?" I ask him.

"Yep. Tell me what an inconsiderate bastard I am. Tell me I acted like an ass. Tell me I'm a shit. Go on. I can take it." He almost has a smirk on his face.

I roll my eyes at him, "Christian, don't."

"No, I'm serious. Go ahead," he insists.

"Okay. You acted like an inconsiderate bastard."

"Really?" he looks like I shot him.

"Yes you did. You did that without talking to me about it and then you lied about why you did it. You did it because you wanted to. You didn't take my feelings into consideration." I try to explain to him. "This isn't a corporation that you are running here. It's a marriage and we have an equal say in what happens. You don't get to make all the decisions by yourself."

"What makes you think I lied about it?" he asks.

"Well, you kept telling me that you did it so I wouldn't have to deal with it. Then after we got into it, you admitted that you did it because you wanted all the stuff gone and I hadn't done it yet."

"I didn't really lie. I did do it so you wouldn't have to deal with it. But I did need it to be gone." He is staring into his wine glass as he talks to me.

"Christian. I understand why you needed to get rid of his things. I really do. I know we need to move on and get past it." I can feel my chin begin to tremble and I'm trying hard not to cry. "But, all you had to do was to talk to me about it. Tell me how you were feeling. Tell me what you needed. I want to help you and support you. I want to be able to give you what you need from me, but I can't if I don't know what that is."

He just nods and remains silent.

"Is that it? You're just going to sit there? I can't do this by myself." I stare over at him just staring into his glass and maintaining his silence. "Christian open your mouth and talk to me."  
I stand up and walk across the room. Folding my arms across my chest I turn around to look at him. "God damn you. You are acting like an ass. You promised to talk to me. Don't sit there like you're made of stone."

"I feel like I'm fucking fifteen and sitting in my father's office getting a lecture." He finally looks up at me.

"Fuck you." I walk toward him. "I'm not your parent, I'm your wife. I'm not here to lecture you, but if you don't talk to me then it makes it real hard to have a conversation."

"I should have talked to you." He finally admits. "I just didn't know how. I knew you weren't ready to tackle the room. But I couldn't bear it any longer. I was afraid that you'd want to hold on to all of it, and I never wanted to see any of it ever again."

"Christian. All you had to do was tell me that." I sit back down on the sofa. "I want to know what you're feeling. I need to know what you're feeling. We could have saved ourselves all this grief and arguing, if you had just opened up to me."

"I …I can't do that. Not about this," he confesses.

"Why not? Why not about this?" I ask him.

"Because it's still so fresh. It's still a big fucking open wound and I can't deal with it."

"Yes. It is a big open, gaping wound. But pretending that it isn't there won't make it go away." He looks so hurt. "Christian I need you right now. And whether or not you admit it, you need me. If you don't open up to me…..we won't make it."

His eyes dart up to mine. " Won't make it?"

"That's right. You have to work with me. I can't carry all of this for both of us."

"Are you thinking about leaving?" his eyes are welling up.

"No. No it never crossed my mind to leave. I can't imagine life without you. It would be very dull to say the least." I pause a moment. "I think you understand just how much you hurt me by clearing his room out without letting me know."

"I do…but…." he starts.

"But what? Tell me."

"I….I feel like it's all my fault."

"What's your fault? Not telling me about cleaning the room out is definitely your fault."

He scrapes his hand through his hair. "Everything. It's all my fault. Me getting you pregnant when you didn't want to, Elena harassing you and pushing you and then losing Sam." He rubs the back of his neck. "I should have dealt with Elena differently. I should have made sure she was out of our lives. Hell it's my fault she was in our lives to start with. I let her in."

"Christian. It's not your fault. First, we both got pregnant. It's not something you forced on me. Second, you didn't bring her into our lives, she is the one who came after you. She's the one who decided to try to get you back and forced her way in again. I could have gone to the police just as well as you could have, but I didn't. At least not soon enough."

Reaching over I take his chin in my hand and turn him to face me. "You didn't cause all of that. I'm not mad about that. I'm mad about the room. Can we focus on that?"

"It's just my fault he's gone. I didn't deal with her and now my son is dead because of it." Christian gets up and takes a few paces away putting some physical distance between us.

"Christian. He was _our_ son. Not _your_ son." I correct him.

"Damn it Ana, she almost fucking killed you as well." He turns around to look at me. "What would I have done if she had?"

"Christian. I'm not dead. I'm here. Don't dwell on 'what if'. We have to deal with what happened. Stop blaming yourself for something that isn't your fault."

"But that's what made it so hard to live with the stuff in that room. It was killing me. It was a constant reminder of everything. The pain and the guilt had just become overwhelming." He starts pacing and rubbing his neck. "I needed some relief. I was to the point I couldn't deal with it any more. I should have talked to you, but how could I? How could I face you knowing what I had done; what I put all of us through?"

"Have you gone back to see John since all of this happened?" I ask.

"Yes. A couple of times," he growls.

"I wish you had told me. What did he have to say about it?"

"Some crap about being responsible for myself and not being responsible for the actions of anyone else. He said Elena had her own issues and I had no control over her or what she did."

"Sounds pretty reasonable to me. Why aren't you listening to him?" I ask. "You pay him an awful lot of money not to listen to him."

"I just wish I could do it all over again and do it right this time." He sits back down beside me now closing the space between us. Propping on his elbows which rest on his knees he is staring at his fingers as he talks.

"What do you want to do over again?" I reach over and lightly rub his back.

"Everything. I wish I could start at about 4, when Mom and Dad adopted me. I understand it all so much better now. I wouldn't need to fight, or drink or…. or fuck Elena. I would have stayed in school. I wouldn't be so fucked up. I could have been a better son to them. I could be a better husband to you."

"That's a lot of 'could haves' and 'would haves'. Unfortunately life doesn't give us any do overs. You just learn from your mistakes, move on and try to do better. Like they say, you live and learn."

"Can you forgive me for cleaning out Sam's room without talking to you?" he looks over at me.

"I'm not sure. I'm really going to try." I tell him. "I probably won't ever forget it."

He looks over at me. "I'm sorry I did that. You know it's breaking my heart that I hurt you."

"Thank you." I tell him." Just, please, please talk to me. Don't keep stuff bottled up inside you, Christian. It would have been better to discuss things and prevent both of us from getting hurt rather than having to deal with the fallout ."

"Wait. Just a minute." He gets up and walks over to his dresser and opens a drawer. He closes it and walks back over and sits down. "Here. I don't know why I took it from his room. I just did. I guess I just needed something."

He hands me a little sterling silver baby brush with Sam's initials engraved on it. The brush is so small. I can feel tears spill from my eyes as I hold it and stroke the soft bristles. "Were you going to tell me you had this?"

"Yes. I just felt so bad about taking it and then getting rid of the rest. Actually, I took it weeks ago while you were still in the hospital. I just needed something of his to keep close to me. I didn't mean to keep anything from you."

I nod and try to smile, but it doesn't come. "I understand. I guess I'm glad you did. Now we have something of his."

"You keep it. I know you need something to hang on to," he tells me.

"No Christian. _We'll _keep it. It belongs to both of us." I tell him. "But just so you know, if you mess around with those strippers, not only will I castrate you, I'll keep this brush when I divorce you."

He looks over at me and strokes my cheek with the back of his fingers. "I'm not worried about it."

I take his hand in mine and give it a quick kiss. "Well. Are you ready for bed? I'm exhausted."

"Yes. I'm tired too. It's been a long day. Besides I need to rest up for all the drinking and strippers Friday," he gives me a smile and rolls his eyes.

Narrowing my eyes I give him a warning look as we walk over and slide into bed.

"I know you're not ready for anything else, but can I hold you?" Christian asks.

I scoot over next to him and he pulls me up close to him and we weave our legs together. "I'd like that."

I can feel his arms as he wraps them around me. It makes me feel safe and warm. "Ana?"

"Yes, sweetheart?"

"I promise to talk to you. I won't do anything like this again," he explains as he nuzzles my hair.

"Thank you. I just hate it when we argue." I tell him.

"Me too. It makes me feel like there is a distance between us; like I'm separated from you. I don't want to ever be separated from you."

We lie quietly for a few minutes, just being with each other.

"Where is Elliott having the bachelor party?" I ask him.

"He's booked a room in some hotel down on 1st," he tells me.

"1st? "

"Yep. He has plans to take Ethan to one of those strip joints then back to the hotel for a party. Liquor, girls, porn. Classic bachelor party. Elliott has no imagination."

"Christian I'm not sure I like that. Do Kate and Mia know what he has planned?"

He snorts, "I seriously doubt it."

"Then why are you telling me? Aren't you afraid I'll spill the beans to them?" I look up at him and ask.

"I guess I told you because I have no intention of participating in that crap. I'll go and make an appearance, but that's it."

"How does Elliott know how to set this thing up. I mean where does one go to procure women and porn?" I ask.

"Anywhere. It's not that hard," he tells me. " If you want it, it's out there, baby. And after all, he is Elliott. He pretty much sewed every wild oat he had before Kate and he had quite a few."

"Promise, you won't stay long?" I ask him.

"Hey, you're the one that insisted that I go," he chides me.

"I know. I want you to go to support Ethan, but I don't like the girls and audio visual entertainment. "

He gives me a big hug, "I may do some really stupid things, but you never have to worry about any of that. I'm perfectly happy and content with what I have right here. I'm trying really hard not to mess it up."

I can feel him as he nuzzles my hair aside and softly kisses my neck. "That's nice." I whisper and turn over to face him.

"Sometimes I look at you and I can't believe you're really mine." He brushes the hair out of my eyes. " I remember the first time I ever saw you and you looked up at me with those blue eyes. I knew that instant that I wanted you."

"Yeah, wanted me for a sub," I giggle.

"It didn't take but a couple of hours with you to realize you weren't sub material." He strokes his thumb across my cheek. "Your constant questions, your smart mouth, your stubbornness. But I still had to have you. I knew I always wanted to be able to look into those blue eyes. I needed for you to be mine. Just mine."

"Well you got me. Disappointed?" I ask as I look into those gray eyes.

"Never." he whispers against my lips and he softly kisses me; my lips moving gently underneath his.

"Your mine." he whispers.

"Yes. Always yours. Always yours, Christian."

**A/N: Thank you for all of the comments, reviews and PMs. I read each and every one. Your enjoyment is keeps me writing. Thank you.**


	13. Chapter 13

_**Fifty Shades…Full Circle**_

**Chapter 13**

I awake to Christian stroking my cheek. "You're watching me again." I growl at him with my just awake voice and snuggle down in my pillow.

"I know. I imagine I always will. I'm always so grateful when I wake up to realize that you're still here. You're still mine."

I put my arms around him and pull him over on top of me. Gazing up into his eyes I raise my lips to meet his. Fisting his hair in my hands I wrap my legs around his hips and guide him to me.

"Do you want to?" he whispers to me.

"Yes. I need you. I've missed you." I whisper back.

I hear his gasp as he murmurs against my ear, " You feel so good. I want to do this slow. I want to savor every moment of it." His breathing is deep and unmetered and I gasp as I feel him gently begin to make love to me. He lowers his head to nuzzle my neck. "Is that good, baby?" he asks.

All I can manage is a throaty, "Yes."

"God, this is my favorite place to be," he says against my shoulder. "I never want to leave. A soft moan escapes me as he continues to worship my body with his.

"Stop. Hold still just a minute. I'm gonna' come and I don't want to yet," he whispers. I can feel his heart racing against my chest. "I can't last much longer."

I comb my hand through his hair and slow down following his lead, "Oh, God." Is all I can get out and I can feel my breath begin to hitch as he starts to move again.

"Do you like that?" he asks as he is pushing me closer and closer to the edge. "Are you close baby?" he asks.

"Yes. Yes." My breathing is getting ragged and my belly is trembling.

"Open those eyes. I want to see them. I want to watch you," he murmurs as I begin to feel myself fall over. My breathing stops and my entire body trembles as I look into his eyes and surrender to him. "That's my girl. Come for me, baby."

My God what he does to me. What he can make my body do. It is so attuned to him it responds automatically, it craves him. I adore this man. My need for his is overwhelming. He's my drug, my bliss, my heaven yet at the same time he can be my torment and frustration. But, whatever he is, I am his without hesitation or reservation. I can feel myself building again as he begins racing to his climax. There is a tortured mask of pleasure on his face as he is reaching the edge of his endurance. Just as I fall over again, I watch him as he reaches his own release.

Throwing his head back I hear, "Fuck. Shit," as he growls into the air. Finally we begin to relax simultaneously and he collapses on me burying his face in my hair. I can feel his warm breath on my neck and feel his soft lips as he glides them across my skin.

"Never leave me Anastasia. I couldn't bear it. I can't imagine my life without you," he murmurs.

"Christian, I'm not going anywhere. Why would you say that?" I ask as I kiss his cheek and stroke his hair.

"When we fight it always scares me. I always hold my breath until we get it worked out and I know you're going to stay."

" Really? Still after eight years you feel that way? Christian. I married you. I committed my life to be with you. We're going to have disagreements and argue from time to time, but it doesn't mean I'm going to leave you. Please just get that out of your head. Now if I ever catch you with another woman that might just be a different story, but not because we disagree on something. Never," I try to reassure him.

"I know that. It's just deep down I still have this nagging feeling that I don't deserve you. I don't deserve all of this; you, the children the life we have. I never want to wake up and find it's all a dream."

"Well it's not a dream and it's time for me to get up and get our dream child off to school."

He gently rubs my nose with his and kisses the side of my mouth stroking my lips with his. "Okay. If you have to, but I'd like to continue this discussion this evening," he gives me a wicked smile.

"Mr. Grey have you forgotten? You have a rehearsal, a dinner and a bachelor party to attend this evening?" I remind him.

He falls back on the bed, "Damn. I forgot about all of that. Well when I get home we'll revisit this. I won't be late." Giving me a quick kiss, he sits up and throws his legs over the side of the bed and heads to the bathroom to shower and get ready for work.

I get my son up and as he gets dressed I go back to talk to Christian. He's out of the shower and has a towel wrapped around his waist. He has just lathered his face to shave. "Is the boy up?" he asks.

"Yes. He's getting dressed. I need to know what you want for breakfast."

"Oh. I guess a couple of eggs and bacon and toast. What's Teddy having a pimento cheese sandwich?" he snorts.

"No. He opted for pancakes this morning." I'm standing beside him facing him and leaning against the counter watching him shave.

"Traditional breakfast? I was beginning to wonder about his food choices. If he's having pancakes I'll make it easy and have them too."

I find myself unconsciously mimicking his facial movements as he drags the razor across his skin. "He just doesn't feel the need to limit his selections to the particular meal. He asks for what he's hungry for. My son thinks out of the box."

"What are you doing?" Christian looks over at me.

"Huh?" I'm totally lost in him. Just standing here drinking him in. Watching his body move, his muscles flex and then there is that smile.

He leans over and gives me a quick kiss and gets lather on my face. "You're staring at me."

"I know. I like to watch you shave." I tell him as I reach over and grab the washcloth to wipe my face. "Christian I need to call Paul and give him an answer. Before I do I just want to make sure you're okay with this."

"I guess so. I want you to be happy and if this is what you want ….then do it." He looks over at me as he stretches his neck up and slides the razor over it. "I'm not over joyed about the situation, but ….."

"Thank you sweetheart. I'll call Paul today and let him know." I kiss his bare shoulder and give it a quick nip with my teeth before leaving to check on Teddy.

"Just make sure the bastard pays you what your worth," he yells back as I leave.

The men are fed and on their way out the door. I give Teddy a quick kiss on his head, "Have a good day, sweetie. I'll see you this afternoon."

Christian saddles up for his morning good bye kiss. He wraps his arms around my waist picking me up to look me eye to eye and presses his lips to mine, parting them. I can hear a soft moan escape him as our lips dance across each other and then he softly nips my bottom lip. "I'll be home around lunchtime to get ready for tonight," he breaths against my lips before setting me back on my feet.

"Dad, if you're finished, can we leave?" I hear Teddy growl at his dad.

Never breaking eye contact with me, "I'm on my way son. Just saying good bye to your mother." He whispers in my ear, "I don't want to leave. I want to take you back to bed. I want to spend my morning up to my neck in you instead of meetings and reports."

"I know. But you'll be home early. We can revisit this then." I push him away and catch my breath as I shoo him out the door to work.

After showering and dressing for the day, I finish up my chores upstairs and decide it's time to make some phone calls and commitments. Finding Paul's business card I take a deep breath and call his cell.

"Paul Sanders."

"Paul? This is Ana Grey. Am I catching you at a bad time?"

"Ana! No. Not in the least. I'm glad to hear from you. I was wondering if I would."

"I wasn't sure if I should use your personal cell or call through the company number on your card."

"I gave you my personal cell for a reason. I expected you to use it," he genuinely sounds glad to hear from me. He's so upbeat and friendly. He certainly is a different type of CEO than Christian is. But then Christian has so much more responsibility than Paul does. Paul runs one company and Christian has so many to keep up with.

"Good. Thank you."

"Have you thought about my offer?" he asks.

"Yes I have. I have thought about it and talked it over with Christian, like you asked me to."

"And?"

"And I'd very much like to work for South Atlantic Publishing." I let out a big sigh. There it's done. I've said the words and made the commitment. It feels good.

"That's great news. I was hoping you would agree, Ana. Any idea of when you would like to start?"

"Well, I suppose anytime. I am going to have an office built and will need to get everything set up. But I can certainly start before all of that is completed. Whatever you would like."

"Well. Why don't we say first of next month. That should give you time to get your ducks in a row. Tell you what; I'll be flying out to the office in Sacramento about that time. Why don't I stop in Seattle and pick you up. You'll need to come to the office and meet with your assistant and a few of the authors you'll be inheriting from Jim as well meeting with him, and getting the usual indoctrination from human resources. How will that work?"

"Sounds great. Who is Jim?"

"James Dillard. He is retiring and you'll pick up his authors and staff. You'll like Connie, his assistant. She's been with us for ages. She knows all the ropes. She's from the west coast and jumped at the chance to transfer when we opened up the office out there."

"James Dillard? I'll be taking his clients?"

"Yes. Is that a problem?"

"No. Not at all. He is just so well respected and handles really prominent authors. I just figured I'd have to start at the bottom and work up."

"Well, I think you can handle it. Besides I think they will enjoy working with someone a bit younger, someone with fresh ideas and new concepts. Don't worry, we won't let you drown."

"That all sounds great. How long will I need to be there?"

"Oh, a day or two, maybe three. It depends on how quickly we can get the ball rolling and get the authors in for you to meet with."

"I'm really excited about it."

"Me too Ana. I'll call you later in the month and we can solidify the plans. I'll send you a contract with salary requirements and all the usual contractual bullshit."

"That sounds good , Paul. I'm looking forward to it."

"Me too, Ana. I'm really glad you'll be coming on board. I'll call you later and please call me if you have any questions. Use this number if you want to. That way you can avoid having to leave messages."

"I will. And thank you Paul."

"No problem. I'll talk to you soon."

Wow. I've really done it. I can't believe I'm finally going to do this. I need to get in touch with Elliott, Gia and Liz to get the ball rolling on this office. I probably should have the empty room upstairs redecorated as well. It's just a big empty space right now. Maybe having it repurposed will make things better for everyone.

Now I need to get in touch with Ms. Douglas. I promised I'd call her this week. Maybe having to go to Sacramento is a good thing. I can probably get away with meeting her there easier than I can here. As long as Christian doesn't send a body guard with me. I doubt Paul would appreciate me bringing along my own security team on a quick trip to the office.

I look up her number in my phone and dial.

"Hello, may I please speak with Mrs. Douglas? This is Anastasia Grey."

"One moment please, Mrs. Grey."

After waiting a few moments, "Mrs. Grey. This is Virginia Douglas. It's good to hear from you."

"Thank you, Mrs. Douglas."

"Please call me Virginia."

"Virginia. I wanted to call and touch base with you. I still want to meet with you, however it may be a bit tricky meeting here in Seattle. My husband insists on a security detail most of the time and I feel sure they would inform him of our meeting. I'd rather not do that; at least not just now."

"I see. Where would you feel comfortable meeting, Mrs. Grey?"

"I will be in Sacramento around the first of next month. Would that be something that you would be willing to do?"

"Sacramento is fine. I can meet there just as well as Seattle."

"Good. I'm not sure of the exact dates right now. May I call you later in the month when I confirm the dates that I will be in Sacramento?"

"That will be fine. I'm very anxious to have the time to talk with you. There is so much that I want to know about Christian."

"I understand. There is a great deal about you and his mother and father that I'd like to know too. "

"Yes. I'd like for you to know as well. I'd be glad to bring photos or any information that would be of interest to you."

"I would appreciate that. I'll be in touch later in the month then, Virginia. And thank you for your patience."

"No thank you for this opportunity, Mrs. Grey. Until later then."

"Yes. I'll be in touch. Good bye, Virginia."

Well. That is taken care of. She sounds so genuine. I just can't believe that she could be after money. For some reason I really believe she is who she says she is. I need to go check the closet and see what I have to wear tonight.

Walking into my closet I see my bridesmaid dress hanging in its protective bag. It was delivered while we were in Houston. It had to be altered again at the last minute. It was originally fitted allowing me room for a nine month pregnancy, but now had to be taken in to fit my much smaller form. Looking past it, I rummage through my closet and find a black lace cocktail dress that hits mid- thigh with three quarter length lace sleeves and a bateau neck. It would be see through but for the black silk under slip that is both shorter in length and lower cut at the neckline than the lace outer dress. I'll pair it up with black pumps and my diamond drop earrings. That should do it.

Now that that is taken care of I think I'll head down and eat a bite of lunch. The house is so quiet. Myra is running errands, and Gail has taken Grace to a play date leaving me the house all to myself. This is a rare luxury. Looking in the fridge Gail has made some fresh chicken salad with grapes, pecans and celery. Perfect. I'm just putting the finishing touches on my sandwich and in the process of cutting it in half, when I about jump out of my skin.

"Oh! Shit! What the hell are you doing?" I am surprised when I feel arms around my waist and a kiss on my neck. It takes me an instant to recognize it as my husband. "What are you doing home so early?"

"I said I'd be back around lunchtime," he growls as he buries his nose in my hair.

"I know. But for you that usually means around two o'clock not noon." I turn around to face him still in his embrace. His lips tackle mine and move across them with sweet determination as mine surrender to him.

"Where is everybody?" he asks only breaking our contact long enough to ask his question.

"Mmm. Teddy is still at school…" he captures my mouth again. "…and Gail took Grace to a play date…." I'm taken once more. "…and Myra went to the grocery and to run errands."

"You mean we're alone?" he asks against my mouth.

"Yes. I believe we are," I'm able to gasp.

"Really?" he backs off to look at me.

"Yes, I do believe we are alone in this huge house, Mr. Grey." I smile at him with my arms still secured around his neck.

"Well we're wasting time. I haven't been able to get you off my mind all morning. I couldn't concentrate on a fucking thing, so I just gave up and came home. My balls are killing me and my dick is about to break through my zipper."

"Mmm. That sounds distressing. I can see why you couldn't concentrate. Perhaps I can help relieve your distress." I take his mouth with mine again.

"That's just making it worse," he growls. "What I need is a good old fashion fucking."

"Sounds like a reasonable solution." I give him a quick kiss on his nose.

Christian grabs me under my knees and folds me over his shoulder. "Come on wife. We have work to do." He says as he slaps me on my butt and begins to walk out of the kitchen.

"Wait. Wait. My sandwich." I shout. Christian turns around and grabs my sandwich plate and we head upstairs. Once there Christian throws me on the bed and follows me pinning me underneath him. He spends most of the afternoon demonstrating his repertoire of sexual skills, which are pretty much limitless. You can almost cut the air it is so heady with pheromones. We finally are sitting naked on our bed leaning against the headboard splitting the chicken sandwich and talking. Christian leans over and licks my breast. "You had a crumb," he grins at me.

"Thanks," I smirk at him.

"Wait, there's another one," he tells me as he leans in and glides his tongue over the other one. He drops the rest of his sandwich on the floor and moves over on top of me wrapping his arms around my waist and ravaging my breast. His breathing is ragged as he sucks and nuzzles; his tongue caressing my skin.

All I can manage is to moan and drop my sandwich, surrendering to him again. Looking down I watch him devour me. "My God . You're insatiable this afternoon." I whisper to him as I fist his hair.

"Mmm." I can feel the vibration as he moans against me.

"God, baby. You're killing ,me."

He rests his head on my chest and looks up at me. "I can't get enough of you today," he says his fingers gently stroking the already engorged area between my thighs. "Every time I take you, I think I'm finally finished, then I look at you and need more of you."

He continues to caress me as he calmly talks to me, but I am having difficulty forming words. "Do all married men act this way about their wives?" I ask.

"Baby I have no idea. I can only vouch for me and I am one husband that can't get enough of his wife." His eyes are getting heavy as he looks up at me. "Fuck I love you," the words are gauche, but the meaning is so intense and they are enough to put me on the precipice.

I catch my breath as he lets me teeter on the edge of my sanity. "Do you need to come?"

"If you'll let me, please," asking for permission for some reason.

My arms are wrapped around him and I tighten my grip and pull him to me as my arousal reaches a fever pitch. He is relentless and within seconds I am at my breaking point. I can't control myself and I feel my body relax as the climax races through me. All I can do is go limp and let it claim me taking me with it. He teases me and taunts me until I finally begin to regain consciousness again. Releasing me he crawls up to take my mouth with his. As our lips seal against each other, I wrap my arms around his neck and push him over on his back. I follow him forcing him down as I straddle him and reach behind me taking him in my hand. He crosses his arm across his eyes and I can see his face take on a sensual mask blurring his beautiful features.

Leaning forward I glide my hands upward over his skin; my fingers combing through the hair on his chest and remembering a time when I wouldn't be able to do this. Slowly I lift myself on to my knees and I can hear his gasp as I take him. "Oh, God baby," he gushes as he slides his hands up my body. They stop to cup my breasts and I place my hands on top of his as he squeezes and massages them. As they again skim down my body they come to rest cupping my butt. Looking down at him our eyes lock and I sit up straight arching my back and rake my hands through my hair letting it tumble back down around my shoulders.

"God, you're so beautiful," he growls up at me.

I like this position. I like looking down at him feeling like I'm in control, knowing that I possess him at this very moment. Knowing that all he can see and all he can think of is me. At this moment I fill his mind, his senses and his desires. He is mine. He is as addicted to me as I am to him.

"I want to fill you up. I want to consume every inch of you," he growls as he sits up and wraps his arms around my waist. Christian nuzzles his face between my breasts and digs in to begin his drive to his climax. I can hear him grunt with each push upward. His breathing is becoming ragged as he increases his pace and intensity. Suddenly he throws me over and rolls on top of me. I take his mouth with mine and my tongue dances with his as I feel his breath forced out of his lungs with each push. Our abdomens are misted with perspiration and slide over each other with each synchronized move. I watch the muscles in his stomach flex with each push. Damn that's so hot.

"Oh, fuck. I'm gonna' come again," he gasps. He looks like a thoroughbred straining to reach the finish line, his breathing coarse and the perspiration dripping from his mane. I watch him as he reaches his goal and his face contorts with his pleasure. His body shudders along with mine as he is consumed with his climax. I can feel the sweat drip from his hair onto my chest as he trembles above me. As the intensity begins to fade and his face relaxes, he falls on me and begins to breathe again.

He wraps me in his arms and kisses my belly. "God I can't do that again….at least for another five minutes," he laughs.

"Baby, you're killing me. Teddy will be home soon. We should probably get up and get a shower. I stroke my hand through his hair as he kisses my belly.

"I can't move. My muscles have all turned to jelly. I have to stay like this for a while," he gasps against my skin.

I swat his butt, "Come on big boy. Gail and Grace will be home soon and Teddy right behind them."

"Okay. But just for now. I need to build my strength up for tonight. I have to be able to fight off all those strippers."

"Forget fighting them off. If any of them make a move on you, just run and get the hell out of there."

He lifts himself off of me and gives me a quick kiss as he sits back on the bed. "Damn we're wet." He strokes his hand over his abdomen and then through his hair. "Come on. Let's get a shower, baby." He takes my hand and pulls me off of the bed.

* * *

"Sweetheart? Can you zip me up?" I ask Christian as I walk out of my dressing room. I have finally figured out how to put my hair up. It's pinned loosely at my nape with a few loose tendrils that fall around my face, sort of a Grecian look, or so I'm told. The dress is a little snug and maybe a little short, but I was assured this is how it is supposed to look. I tug on the hem a bit as I walk over to Christian and turn around for him to zip me up.

"I want to rip that dress off of you…with my teeth," he whispers as he zips me up.

"Looks that good, huh?" I smile back at him.

"You shouldn't be allowed out in it." He lets out a big sigh," It's going to be a very long frustrating evening."

"Good heavens, Christian. You're going to wear it out." I turn around and give him a quick kiss and a squeeze to the package.

"Careful!" Christian jumps back a bit. "That thing is loaded."

"As long as it doesn't go off, we're good. " I take a step back and look at this fine specimen. "You look sexy. I like that suite. Is it new?"

"Yep. I had it made for the wedding when I had the tux made."

"You got another tux? Why?" I ask him.

"I needed one for the wedding. They all had to match you know." He tells me as he struggles with his cuff links.

"Here let me do that." I push the stem through the opening in the French cuff and secure it in place, then grab the other one and do the same." There. You have more tuxedos than any human could possibly wear. Why do you need so many?"

He shrugs, "I just enjoy wearing them and I like having a choice," he tells me as he finishes the Windsor in his tie. I stop him and take the tie in my hands sliding the knot up and tighten it at his neck." You look hot." I give him a quick smile.

He grabs his jacket and I grab my purse and we walk down to say goodnight to our children. When we get down to the kitchen, the kids are eating dinner, looks like hamburgers and fries. "Wow. You guys look good." Teddy smiles over at us in astonishment.

"You sound surprised. Don't we always look good, son?" Christian asks.

"You know what I mean, Dad," he grabs his burger and takes a big bite. "You're all dressed up," he tries to garble through his burger.

Christian walks over and takes his head between his hands and kisses Teddy's curls, "Don't talk with your mouth full." Teddy just nods.

Grace is covered in catsup, but seems to be enjoying her meal. "Gail what are you doing?" I ask her.

"Oh, just trying to clean up this little purse of Grace's. She left it at the Bingham's this afternoon and I didn't realize it until we were half way home. I had to turn around and drive all the way back to get it. Then she left it outside while ago and it got some dirt on it, so I'm trying to get it cleaned up for her to take tomorrow." She says as she diligently tries to wipe the dirt off of the little bag.

Grace reaches out, "Mine. Mine. My purs." She looks so distressed over it.

"I know angel. I'm trying to get it cleaned up. I swear I think we need to tie it to your arm. You just leave it everywhere." Gail admonishes her.

"I still don't understand why the fu….why she needs a purse." Christian growls.

I exhale and relax the reproachful frown on my face. "You don't have to understand, Sweetheart. She just does. It's just one of the many mysteries of having a daughter. Learn to live with it."

Christian shakes his head and we kiss our kids good bye avoiding the transfer of catsup from Grace's face to our clothing. "Gail I'll be home early. Right after dinner," I tell her.

Christian puts his hand on my back and guides me toward the door. "Come on, baby. Taylor is waiting. Let's go."

We slide into the back of the Bentley and Taylor heads out to Christian's parent's home. "So what are the plans?" Christian asks as he squeezes my hand.

"Well, as I understand it, we will have a short rehearsal at your parent's house, then head over to the club for the rehearsal dinner. Then you will go with Elliott and Ethan and the rest of the guys for the bachelor party and Taylor will take me home." Christian nods in agreement. "Will you be able to get home after the party?" I ask him.

"Yep. Elliott will drive me home," he tells me.

"Elliott? Won't he be drinking?" I ask him.

"Probably. If he has I'll call Sawyer to come get us." He leans over and gives me a quick kiss. "Don't worry. We'll be careful."

We go through a quick run through of the wedding and then all meet back at the country club for dinner. It's so good to see Kate's parents. I haven't seen them in ages. They seem so happy that Ethan and Mia are finally tying the knot. Little do they know they are about to be grandparents again. It's a lovely dinner with everyone relaxed and happy. The dinner conversation is upbeat and everyone is having a good time as the champagne flows. Even Christian appears to be relaxed and in a good mood, leaning back in his chair with his jacket unbuttoned and his arm draped over the back of my chair. It's so good to see him that way. I just love it when he has a carefree look on his face. His thumb is stroking my back as he talks and laughs with his family.

Carrick and Mr. Kavanaugh have both made a toast. Christian has vowed to kill Ethan if he ever hurts Mia. Elliott has made some vile joke that is fraught with sexual innuendo. I think Grace will kill him by the look on her face. As the evening winds down the men gather to depart for their evening of debauchery. Christian puts his arm around my waist and walks me out to the car where Taylor is waiting. He gives me a sweet kiss on my cheek, never being one for public displays of affection, "I won't be late. Just a couple of drinks and laugh at a few crude jokes and I'm on my way home."

"Okay. Try to have fun. But not too much fun." I reach up and give him a long, deep, wet kiss, whether he likes it or not, reminding him of what is waiting for him at home.

He catches his breath, "I may be home earlier than I thought."

Taylor and I talk on the way home and I find out how Sophie is doing in school. Seem she has earned a scholarship to college. Not that Taylor ever had to worry about college. Christian would have seen to it that it was paid for. He really thinks a lot of Sophie and not just because she is Taylor's daughter. She really is a sweet, smart, beautiful girl. Taylor beams when he talks about her, but I can see his jaw tense when I ask about a boyfriend. He and Christian are two peas in a pod when it comes to their daughters. Poor girls don't have a prayer. He lets me know how much he and Gail have appreciated having evenings and weekends off so they can be together, and how much more rested Gail is now that Myra is helping out. I'd do anything for either of them. I couldn't bear losing them, although I know at some point they will both want to retire. I just won't dwell on that.

After entering the dark house I set the alarm and walk upstairs to check on my children. Grace is sound asleep. She looks like such a little angel when she is asleep. She has her rabbit beside her and she is clutching that silly purse of hers. If I had known how much she was going to like it, I'd have gotten her one sooner. I pull on it trying to remove it from her clutches, but she just grasps it tighter, so I give up. Pulling her covers up I give her curls a kiss and then leave to go check on Teddy.

Teddy is knocked out too. He is snoring a little. Allergies I guess. He looks so much like his father. He's going to be a knock out. Luckily he is such a sweet boy; he won't be too hard on the ladies. I cover him up as well and give him a goodnight kiss, then walk back to our bedroom to undress and wash up.

I'm utterly worn out from the day's sextivities. Christian is insatiable sometimes. I have no idea how he does it. He can rival the Energizer bunny at times. Lucky me. My body is exhausted and the bed is calling my name. I slip on my gown and crawl between the sheets drifting off thinking about my Fifty.

I'm roused when I see the room drenched by car headlights and hear a car stop out front. It must be Christian getting home. Looking at the clock it reads 3:40 a.m. Good heavens. He never stays out like this. Waiting and lidtening, I hear a car door close but I don't hear the front door open and then I notice the headlights fade and I hear the car pull away.

Waiting a few moments, I decide to go downstairs and see what is going on. The house is still dark and quiet. "Christian." I whisper. "Christian are you home?" I whisper into the dark. I don't get an answer.

**A/N: A big thank you to everyone for the really nice reviews. I read them all and they are what keep me writing. **


	14. Chapter 14

_**Fifty Shades…Full Circle**_

_**Chapter 14 **_

Carefully easing my way down the stairs I keep softly calling Christian's name but get no answer. The alarm should have gone off if it were an intruder. My heart is beating out of my chest. Maybe I should call Taylor to come over, but I hate to wake him up unnecessarily. I stop and quickly tiptoe back to Teddy's room and grab his aluminum baseball bat and walk back to the stairs ready to do…do what? Hit somebody? Surely not. I hear a noise at the front door and see the door knob wiggle. Shit. Whoever it is, is on the front porch. We have surveillance cameras on the house including the front porch. Surely whoever is monitoring them should see what is going on. My heart jumps when the phone rings. "SHIT!" I run to answer it before it wakes the kids.

"Yes." I whisper into the phone.

"Mrs. Grey. This is Leonard in security. I'm monitoring the CCTV and I am seeing someone on your front porch."

"I know. I Think I can hear someone out there." I whisper to him.

"Mrs. Grey."

"Yes, Leonard." I again whisper to him.

"Don't be alarmed. It's Mr. Grey."

"Mr. Grey?" I say in a normal voice.

"Yes, ma'am. He is sitting on the front porch. He appears to be ill ma'am."

I breathe a sigh of relief. "Thank you Leonard. I'll see to him."

"Do you need any help ma'am?" he asks.

"No thank you. I think I can handle it. Goodnight Leonard."

Turning on the light, I walk to the front door and open it to find my husband sitting on the porch and leaning back against the door facing. "Christian?"

He looks up at me and gives me a sweet smile.

"Baby. Are you okay?" I ask him. "What are you doing out here?"

"I forgot the code to the door," he says weakly. Then leaning over, he spills his dinner all over my ferns.

"Oooo. Yuck!" I do well to hold my own dinner down.

Bending down on my knees I try to catch him from falling off of the porch. "Baby. Did you have too much to drink?" I ask him.

"I don't drink, 'member?" he looks at me through half closed eyes.

"Right." I grab him just as he heaves into my ferns again. "Christian where are your jacket and tie?" I ask as they are obviously missing.

"Umm. Umm. I had 'em." He looks down at his rumpled shirt and pats his chest like he will find his jacket there.

I put my arms under his and try to pull him up. "Come on. Let's get you in the house." I tug but can't get him up. "Baby, you have to help me here. Come on and stand up."

I finally get him to his feet and he drapes himself over me to steady himself. "Come on Mr. I'll-be-home-early. Let's get you up to bed."

I manage to get him up the stairs without waking the children. Once in the bedroom I close the door and he has that 'I'm going to hurl' look on his face. I rush him to the bathroom and get close to the commode. Well close doesn't count when vomiting. "Whoa! Damn Christian. Let's get over the toilet." I carefully tiptoe over the remnants of the hors d'oeuvres now spilled on the tile. He crumples on the floor beside the commode and leans against the wall looking so pitiful. I haven't seen him drunk since he walked out over Teddy.

I drench a wash cloth in cold water and return to wipe his face, cleaning him up.

"I'm going to kill Elliott Grey when I get my hands on him." I mutter to myself.

"Don't ki lelliott . He's my big brother," he tries to get out.

"I will. He dumped you on the front porch and left you. He is probably responsible for you having too much to drink too." I sit down next to him and wipe the cool rag over his face. Looking over at him I see something on his ear. Taking his chin in my hand I turn his head and take a closer look. "What the fuck?" I almost screech. I wipe my thumb over his ear and rub off the red lipstick that is smeared there. "What is this?" I ask him.

"What?" he tries to focus on my fingers to determine what the substance is.

"It looks like lipstick to me. What the hell is it doing on your ear?" I ask.

"I guess she left it there."

"Who is she? And why did she have her mouth on your ear?" I glare at him.

He shrugs and smirks at me. "Don't know. Just did. She said I was cute." He turns to me and tries to kiss me, but I push him off. "Done you thin I'm cute?" he slurs .

"Not right now. Come here." I get up and pull him to his feet. I pull his shirt out of his pants and take it off. Inspecting him as I go. Then I try to get his shoes and socks off without him falling over. Finally I unzip his pants and slide them as well as his boxers down his legs and off. Taking his flaccid member in my hand I inspect it. Thank heavens he couldn't do much damage with that in its present condition.

"Mzz. Grey. You're manhandling me."

"No I'm not. I'm making sure there is no lipstick in places it shouldn't be. It' looks okay." I release his fallen warrior. "Why did you let someone kiss you?" I ask.

"I didn't." he pouts and shakes his head.

"You have lipstick on you. How did it get there?"

"She said I was cute and she tried to kiss me, but I said 'NO!' and when I turned my head she kissed my ear," he shrugs. "Fuck. It was hard to say all that."

"Stay here." I sit him down on the side of the tub and turn on the water in the shower. Going back to get him I put my arms around him and get him to his feet. "Come on. Hold on to me." I walk him into the shower and sit him down on the shower bench. "Here. Just sit here under the water for a bit." I sit down next to him as the warm water washes over him and he leans over on me. "Just Ana. Just want my Ana," he mumbles. I can't help but smile. He's too drunk to be lying. Mr. Control is definitely not in control right now. He's going to feel so bad tomorrow.

"Christian. Did you mess with any of those girls?" I want an answer while he's too drunk to not tell me the truth.

"Nope. I did not." He sighs. "Only you. Wanna' fool around?" he grins over at me barely able to hold his head up and focus his eyes.

"With what?" I ask him.

He looks down between his legs at his dead soldier and tries to pull it up, but it flops between his legs and dangles when he releases it. "Ooops." He whispers over to me, "I think it's sleeping."

"Yes I think so. We should be sleeping too." I stand up and get him all lathered up and rinsed off. Then turning off the water I get a towel and dry him down. I manage to get him to the bed and leave him returning with Advil and a glass of cool water. "Here, baby. Take these." I hand him the small pills and he puts them in his mouth and swallows them with the water. He hands me the glass and I tell him to drink more of the water. He obeys and finishes the glass.

"Okay, time to get some sleep. We have a big day tomorrow…no today." I pull up the covers and help him lie down then cover him up. I go to my side of the bed and slide between the sheets and snuggle down. Just about the time I begin to drift off, I feel Christian flop over and drape himself over me. He is snoring and he smells of alcohol, throw up and…. Christian. I'm too tired to try to move him. I'm going to kill Elliott for not making sure he got safely into the house. And for letting some woman try to kiss my husband. Yes, Elliott Grey is definitely at the top of my shit list.

* * *

"Mom? Where's Dad?" Teddy asks as I put a scrambled egg and bacon in front of him.

"Dad's not feeling too well this morning," I tell him.

"Did he get a virus bug?" he asks.

"Yes. I think he did, sweetie."

"Will he be able to go to Aunt Mia's wedding and stand up front?" he asks as he shovels in the eggs.

"I think so, baby."

"I can do it for him if he feels bad," he offers.

"That's sweet of you, but I think he'll be feeling better in a bit."

Teddy shrugs and eats his bacon. Grace is doing pretty well with her scrambled eggs. She's getting better with that fork, but still using her hand to pick up anything that drops off of the tines.

"I want both of you to behave and mind Gail today. Are you listening to me?" I look at both of them.

"Yes, Mom." I get from Teddy.

Grace just nods as she takes a big gulp of milk. Even though she uses two hands to hold her glass I always hold my breath until it is safely back on the table. "Come here sweetie." I lean over and take her face in my hand and slide a napkin over her mouth wiping away her milk moustache.

"Tank you," she grins over at me.

"Gail!" Teddy screams. I look over to see Mrs. Taylor dragging in.

"What are you doing up so early on Saturday?" I ask her.

"Jason has been up since about four this morning. Leonard called and reported a disturbance early this morning and I couldn't go back to sleep," she rolls her eyes at me.

"Yes. I'm aware. Is it all on tape?" I ask her.

"Yes. I believe it is. Preserved for posterity," she informs me as she pours herself some coffee.

"Can you please have Artie hose off the front porch? It's a bit messy, especially the ferns," I ask her.

"I'll take care of it, Ana."

"Thanks, Gail."

"How's Mr. Grey?" she asks.

"I haven't had the heart to try to wake him up yet. He was pretty bad last night," I tell her. "I thought I'd let him sleep as late as possible." I take a big sip of my tea. "I really feel bad because I encouraged him to go to that bachelor party last night. You know, for all his experience, I make quotation marks with my fingers, education, accomplishments, he's never really had any 'regular guy ' experience. He just doesn't know how to hang out and be one of the boys. I don't know how to fix it." I shake my head. "Obviously I can't trust Elliott to help him."

"Mr. Grey never really had any friends that I 'm aware of except that…woman." Gail says as she sips her coffee.

"I think she kept him from associating with people his own age when he was younger. He never developed any friendships, and really doesn't know how." I stare down into my cup of tea. "Well, I guess that's just the way it is."

"Oh, Ana. Here's the morning paper. You might want to read Section A page 4." She tells me.

"Why? What's in it?" I ask her.

"Just read it. You'll get a kick out of it.

I open the paper and turn to section A page 4 and there is an old file photo of Christian and me at that gala last year. I'm in my black dress with my pearl and diamond necklace and Christian is in what else…a tux. He has his arm around my waist as we are entering the building. I look at the title of the article and read it.

* * *

**Seattle's Grey Makes List of World's Most Influential Men**

In a surprising new survey of more than half a million men, local business man and billionaire philanthropist Christian Grey, CEO of Grey Enterprises Holdings, has been voted number 13 on 's annual roundup of the world's most influential men. The website with 17 million monthly readers announced the results of their 7th annual top 49 Most Influential Men today. Readers were asked to determine which male figures have made the biggest impact and, ultimately, shaped what it means to be a man of influence. Fictional character James Bond topped the list at number 1.

The list of alpha males, chosen by men who want to be alpha males, understand that Bond is not only classy but a serious bad ass ..… and he always gets the woman. Grey brings much of the same stuff: good looks, class, wealth, power…..and evidently he gets the girl as well.

For Seattle's Grey, being a self-made tycoon more than qualifies him to share company with Bond, Bill Clinton, Kanye West, Jay-Z and others on this year's list. They have all been described as "big-game hunters." It's a typical male-fantasy list of people who can do anything they want, get anything they want, in any way that they want. Well done Mr. Grey.

* * *

"Oh, my goodness. Gail have you read this?"

"Yes. I didn't think you had seen it yet." She smiles over at me.

"I need to go see about getting Mr. Influential up. Can you finish up with the kids for me?"

"Sure. I'll get everything cleaned up." She smiles over at the children as she watches them finish their breakfast.

I walk back upstairs carrying a glass of orange juice, a cup of coffee and the paper for Christian. I set them on the night stand and sit on the edge of the bed. He is sprawled out on his stomach taking up most of the center of the bed. Crawling over to him I give him a soft kiss on his cheek,"Baby?" I try to softly whisper.

"Leave me alone," he growls.

I run my hand through his hair, "Christian, baby. It's time to start getting up."

"Don't feel good," he grumbles at me.

"I know. I have some juice and coffee for you."

He frowns at the mention of the beverages as I rub his back and continue to prod him to wake up.

Finally turning over he opens his eyes and looks up at me. "Fuck. I feel awful." He growls as he rubs his hands over his face. "I haven't felt this bad in years."

"I know. You haven't over imbibed in a long time." I continue to rub his tummy now that he has turned over.

"I fucking hate Elliott," he sighs.

"What happened? How did you end up drinking too much?" I ask him.

"Damn if I know. He just kept handing me something to drink and every time I wanted to go he would make me sit back down and have 'just one more'."

"How about the girls? You know you had lipstick on your face when you got home last night."

"Shit, it was vile. After we left the club, we went back to the hotel room and Elliott had these two….god only knows what they were….show up. They kept trying to do lap dances. That's the last thing I wanted. I was tired and had too much to drink and I just wanted to come home." He looks so frustrated. "Elliott kept telling me to get the stick out of my ass and loosen up. Prick."

"So did you?" I ask him.

"Did I what?"

"Get the stick out of your ass and loosen up?" I giggle at him.

"My stick is just fine right where it is," he shakes his head. "There was this one girl who wouldn't leave me alone. Elliott must have paid her or something. She kept telling me I was cute and she was trying to come on to me. Yuck." he makes a face.

"You actually think someone had to pay her to think you're cute?" I ask him.

"I think Elliott paid her to be all over me. It's was like she had ten arms. I almost had to hit her to get her off of me. I don't need that shit."

"What did she look like?" just out of curiosity.

"Fuck just your basic hooker look. Long scraggly bottle blonde hair. And you know how much I love blondes. " he rubs his eyes.

"And?"

"God I don't remember, Ana." He stares at the ceiling for a moment. "Store bought breasts hanging out of her top. Seems like I remember a tattoo of some kind across her backside. Her ass hanging out of some sort of shorts. More make-up than a drugstore counter. And she could have used a bath."

"I'm sorry. I was hoping you would have a good time with the guys." I keep running my hand through his hair.

"I've got better things to do and places I'd rather be than being involved in that sort of shit. I should have taken Sawyer with me, but Elliott didn't want security at the party. I hope Elliott paid them to keep their mouths shut. The last thing I need is for them to go around shooting their mouths off about all of it."

"But you didn't do anything that would be embarrassing if it got out." I'm not sure if that is a statement or a question.

"It is embarrassing that I was even there to start with. What a fucking mess," he snarls. He sits up and I hand him his juice which he downs. His hair is all over his head and a faint stubble blankets his face. He looks rough.

"Here's your coffee," I take his glass and exchange it for the coffee cup.

"My fucking head is killing me," he grumbles as he takes a sip. " And my mouth tastes like a monkey took a shit in it."

"What am I going to do with your mouth?" I ask him. "Are you up or do I need to stay and make sure you don't go back to sleep?"

He reaches around and pulls me to him and I lay my head on his chest as he rubs his hand up and down my back. "I'm up. As up as I'm going to be anyway." He kisses the top of my head,"Thanks for taking care of me last night."

"It's the least I could do since I talked you in to going to the party. And it's a sight more than I can say for your brother."

"Elliott?"

"Yes. He left you sitting on the front porch. I thought you were a burglar. Leonard from security called me to let me know that you were on the porch and it looked like you weren't feeling well. "

"Shit." he rolls his eyes and looks disgusted.

"He called Jason to alert him of the disturbance and when Jason checked the monitor, he recognized that it was you and not an intruder." I smirk at him. "Leonard called to let me know that you were there and were in need of assistance."

"Well I guess I've thoroughly humiliated myself in front of my employees. "

"Oh, everyone is entitled to blow off steam on occasion." Sitting back up I look at his tired beautiful face, "I guess this is when a signed NDA comes in handy."

"You got it." he tries to smile.

"Here this might brighten your day." I hand him the paper turned to the article.

He tries to focus on it as he sips his coffee. "Oh, for fuck sake, "he shakes his head.

"Did you know about that?" I ask him.

"Andrea told me about the press release, but was hoping that would be the end of it."

"You didn't tell me about it."

"I was hoping it would go away and nobody would see it," he gives me a quick kiss. "You do make an awfully cute Bond Girl," he says looking at our picture.

"Make that a Grey Girl, Mr. Grey. Christian Grey." I give him a quick kiss back. "Okay. Time to get that cute influential ass out of bed."


	15. Chapter 15

_**Fifty Shades…Full Circle**_

_**Chapter 15**_

_**A/A: Kudos to everyone who caught the Most Influential Man portion in Chapter 14. I couldn't resist putting that in there.**_

After gathering our wedding attire Christian and I walk out to the SUV to drive over to his parent's home. He looks much better since he had a bath, took a few more Advil and consumed more liquids as well as some food.

Sliding into the back Taylor closes the door for us and he jumps up front to drive us to Christian's parent's house. I look down at my hand, and twist my wedding ring noting the absence of my engagement ring. Christian takes my hand and squeezes it, "Don't worry. We'll replace it," he gives me a smile.

"It can't be replaced. Your husband only proposes and puts a ring on your finger once. If it's gone, it's just gone."

"Any ideas about what happened to it?" he asks.

"None. It just disappeared. I can't accuse anyone when I have no reason to suspect anyone of taking it."

Taylor pulls up to the house and it is beautiful. I haven't seen it look like this since our wedding. The place is crawling with caterers, event planners, florists and the musicians. Everyone is putting the finishing touches on everything. We gather our things and head upstairs to get ready. Walking into Mia's room everyone is already there and getting into their wedding attire. I give Mia a huge hug.

"Mia. Baby, you just look beautiful." She looks so pretty and happy, but not pregnant thank God.

"Thank you. I'm so glad the dress still fits. I've been trying it on everyday just to make sure." She runs her hands over her tummy. "I'm so glad I went with the fuller skirt instead of the mermaid."

"It just looks gorgeous. Are you nervous?" I ask her.

"Surprisingly, no. I'm just so ready to get it done and finally be married."

"I'll give you a little hint. When you walk back up the aisle, you won't feel one bit different than you did walking down it. It took me ages before it hit me that I was married." I take her hands in mine and give them a squeeze.

"Really? I won't feel married?" she asks.

"Nope. You'll still feel like Ethan's your boyfriend. Then one day you'll look over at him and he'll be your husband." I shrug, "I can't explain it. You'll see what I mean."

I leave her to go get ready and I see Kate putting on her makeup with huge rollers in her hair. "Hi Kate. How's it going?"

"Okay I guess," she answers unenthusiastically.

"Christian was absolutely shit faced when he got home this morning. I've never seen him throw up like that. And I may kill your husband for just leaving on the front porch in that condition."

"At least he came home," she says without missing a beat.

I freeze and look over at her, "Kate?"

She shrugs as she presses an eye lash curler on her lashes, "It's not the first time. I'm just ready for it to be the last time."

I get closer and whisper, "Kate. Honey what's going on?"

"I don't want to talk about it right now. I'm trying to remain positive to get through this crapping wedding." She gives me a big mock smile.

"Will you talk to me later?" I ask her. "Please."

"Sure. You might as well know what's going on. Especially since Christian is right in the middle of it."

"What are you talking about?" For the first time in my life, I think I'm angry at her. How dare she accuse Christian of something like that.

"Later." She waves me away. "Don't pay any attention to me. I'm just pissed off this morning and trying to take everyone down with me."

"Kate. I can't imagine how Christian could be involved." I can't believe he would get involved in their marriage.

"Ana. Don't worry, I shouldn't have said anything."

"But you have, and I believe I deserve to know what's going on."

"Come on." She grabs my arm and we head into another bedroom. "Look. I'm not sure what's going on. All I know is that Elliott has been staying in town when he works late, which is a lot lately. More than is reasonable."

"What does that have to do with Christian?"

"He has given Elliott free use of the Escala place. He gave him the access code and told security to let him use it whenever he needs to."

"Well, that doesn't sound too unreasonable. I mean Christian used to stay in town when he worked late on occasion."

"Yes, but I imagine he stayed there alone." She rolls her eyes at me. "I'm not so sure about Elliott."

"Is he having an affair?" I just can't believe this.

"Oh, hell. I don't know, Steele." She appears to be thinking about it. "He just goes there so much and when we have an argument he storms out and stays there, sometimes for several days. It's just too convenient. He should be at home with me and the kids, not all snuggled in at Escala, with heaven knows who?"

"What makes you think he's seeing someone?" I ask her.

"Fuck, I don't know if it's someone or everyone." I think she may cry. "Hell, he sure hasn't touched me lately. I can't even get him aroused anymore. And that was always so good for us, you know?" I can see her wipe away a tear. "He just stays so irritable all the time, like he's mad at me. I can't seem to do anything right. We fight constantly."

"Kate, I had no idea." I'm so upset that this is happening to my best friend. "Christian never mentioned it to me. I'm so sorry." I try to hug her. "Do you want me to have Christian kick him out?"

"I don't know. At least I know where he is when he stays there. I just don't want it to be so convenient for him." She looks like she wants to ask me something. "Ana. Christian has security monitoring that place, doesn't he?"

"Yes. No one can make a move without it being monitored and caught on tape."

"Do you think that Christian would let us look at those tapes? I really need to know what is going on. It's just eating me up inside."

"I'll certainly ask him and I don't see why he wouldn't. Besides, I own that place right along with him. I have a right to see them and I shouldn't have to ask." I put my arm around her. "Kate, don't worry. Elliott loves you. I'm sure this is nothing. Maybe he just needs a little space. You know how men can be."

"How?"

"I don't know. It just sounded like the right thing to say. You know a lot more about men than I do. All I know is Christian Grey and I doubt he's very much like most men."

"That's for damn sure," she snorts and we both have a giggle.

"Come on. Let's go get dressed and get these two married." I give her a big hug and try to raise her spirits.

"Oh, did you know that Mia is pregnant?" Kate asks me.

"You know?" I thought it was a secret.

"Of course. It's the worst kept secret going." She says. "Ethan told me. He's so excited I think he may wet himself. I think Grace and Carrick are the only two that don't know yet."

"Yeah. I think she just wanted to walk down the aisle and wear her white dress without a lot of talk," I mention.

"How did Christian take it?"

"Just like you would think. He was ready to kill Ethan for getting his little sister knocked up. How about Elliott?"

"About the same. They sure are odd creatures."

My hair and make-up are done and I slip into my blue chiffon dress. It fits well. It sure looks different than when I bought it. Kate and I zip each other up and slide into our shoes. Looking over at Mia she looks so beautiful. Her dress is perfect and Grace is fastening her pearls around her neck for her. Her hair is longer and it is sleeked back into a chignon at the back of her head. Grace helps her attach the veil right above it and fluffs it spreading it out. I can see Grace's eyes welling up as she looks at her daughter in the mirror. I think about what I'll feel like when I go through this with Grace. That is if Christian will ever let her date.

The florist comes in and distributes the beautiful spring bouquets to all of us and hands Mia her bouquet of soft pink, yellow and white roses. There is a smattering of greenery in among the roses. The bridesmaid's bouquets are all spring colors, pinks, yellows, purples, blues, orange and green. Thank heavens they are not huge and heavy. Just enough to add color. I have my hair in that same Grecian up-do as last night, since it is the only up-do I can manage to accomplish, but it goes well with the dress. We all sport large pearl studs and a strand of pearls completing the ensemble.

There is a knock at the door and Carrick sticks his head in. That's our cue to leave and let him have a few minutes with his baby girl. Grace gives Mia a tearful kiss and a sad sweet smile and then gives Carrick a quick kiss and strokes his cheek.

We head out into the hall and down the stairs to wait for our cue to start down to the site of the vows. I feel like I'm in a gaggle of hens with all the giggling and nervous chatter.

Finally the wedding planner gathers us all together and lines us up to get ready for the procession. Mia has chosen to not use the traditional wedding march. Opting instead for pieces by Handel, Mozart and Christoph Gluck. A harp, piano and cello play all of the wedding music. Mia had tried her best to get Christian to play her down the aisle, but he refused, and he usually doesn't deny her anything.

We finally get our cue and Kate takes off toward the alter. There is a long carpet that leads across the lawn and down to the alter. It looks a little difficult to navigate and it has been covered in rose petals by the flower girl. I almost feel bad that I didn't let Grace or Teddy participate in the ceremony. I just thought that they weren't ready yet. I watch as Kate carefully negotiates the long carpet and is about half way down.

About the time I get my signal to start, I see Christian down front. He looks gorgeous. His new tux fits like a glove and those Brionis really accentuate his physique. It's no accident that James Bond wears the same brand of tux. He could be James Bond. He certainly has the face and the body, not to mention that je ne sais quoi. Guess that would make me a Bond Girl. Just as long as I'm Christian's girl. That song runs through my head, '_The way that you hold me, Whenever you hold me, There's some kind of magic inside you, That keeps me from runnin', But just keep it comin', How'd you learn to do the things you do?' _That's right, nobody does it better than my Fifty.

I give him a quick wink when I get to the front and turn to join Kate. Finally Lily has made her nasty way down to join us and it's time for Mia. Everyone stands as the music starts and she appears on Carrick's arm. Looking over at Ethan, he is about to explode he's so happy. Christian looks like he's going to hurl again. Carrick finally deposits Mia at the front and hands her off to Ethan. The minister is about to open his mouth when I hear a shrill, "Mama". That's Grace, I recognize that voice. Please be quite baby, please. "Mama. Want Mama". I glance over and see her squirming to get out of Gail's lap and turning red in the face. This isn't going well. Poor Mia turns around and looks in Grace's direction. She gives her a big smile and motions for Grace to come on down with us. Poor Gail doesn't know what to do, but eventually lets her down and Grace takes off running to us. After a few steps my poor baby trips on the carpet and lands on all fours. Her little satin dress flies over her head and her purse hits the ground spilling the contents everywhere. And piercing the solemnity, in her best and loudest little three year old voice, "Fuck." Strange how she still has problems pronouncing her other words, but that one was loud and clear.

I'm frozen. That's not my child. Nope, that's Christian's child. I think I may die of total and utter humiliation. After a stunned silence, I begin to hear muffled laughter. I glare at Christian who is trying to avoid catching my eye. I notice his mother appears to be glaring at him as well. Not being able to ignore my child's plight, I excuse myself and go to help her. I get her on her feet and reach down for her little purse. I quickly pick up the contents to put back in it; three tissues, one Chapstick, two crayons, one orange and one pink, one 9.72 carat, E flawless, oval diamond solitaire engagement ring, two Legos and a hard French fry. I grab her little hand and drag her with me to take my place back in the line-up. I hope my face isn't as red as it feels. I put my arm around Grace and pull her to me and mouth to her to be quiet. She puts her arm around my leg and I pull her close and rub my hand over her back to try to calm her.

Finally everyone settles down and the minister tries to start again. He welcomes everyone and speaks to Mia and Ethan. Then he asks for the rings and vows. Ethan goes first. I'm already getting teary as he takes her hand and stares into her eyes. "Mia, from the moment our paths crossed you've surprised me, distracted me, captivated me, and challenged me in a way that no human being ever has. I've fallen in love with you again and again, countless times, without reservation, and I still can't believe that today I get to marry my best friend. I promise to be true to you, to uplift and support you, to frustrate and challenge you, and to share with you the beautiful moments of life. Someday, if the stars align, I might even let you win an argument." Everyone snickers. "No matter what trials we encounter together or how much time has passed, I know that our love will never fade, that we will always find strength in one another, and that we will continue to grow side by side. I believe in the truth of what we are, and I will love you always, until I take my very last breath."

Ethan slips the gold and diamond band on Mia's finger and then she takes his hand. "Ethan, I love you. You are my once-in-a-lifetime, my miracle. You are all I could ever need in my life, my friend, my lover, my everything. I promise to be faithful to you, to love you, honor you, live with you, respect you and cherish you. I promise to encourage you, to laugh with you and to comfort you in times of sorrow. I promise to grow along with you, to be willing to face changes in order to keep our relationship alive and exciting. I promise to love you in good times and in bad, with all I have to give and all I feel inside the only way I know how. I will always be the person that you can trust, talk to and the person that will always understand. I will make my home in your heart. These promises I give you today and all of the days of our lives. Completely and forever." Mia tries to slip the gold ring on Ethan's hand and has a little difficulty and we can hear a few bits of laughter as she struggles. Ethan finally helps her and pushes it on his finger.

Okay, there isn't a dry eye in the house. I feel myself shudder as I try to keep from being reduced to a quivering heap of weeping flesh. Christian seems to be doing a good job of keeping his stick up his ass. He is expressionless. Probably thinking about some merger to keep his mind off of the sentimentality. He finally looks in my direction and we lock eyes. He gives me a little smile and a wink.

The minister pronounces them and introduces them as Mr. and Mrs. Ethan Carter Kavanaugh. Thank God. They are beaming and turn to walk back up the aisle. Lily takes the arm of Timothy Buchannan, Ethan's best man. Someone he went to college with and then Grace and I walk toward Christian. He stops and picks up Grace and gives me a quick kiss as I take his arm as we retreat up the aisle. Teddy takes my hand as we pass him and he joins us in our trek. We finally catch up with Mia and Ethan and I apologize profusely for Grace ruining the ceremony. Mia is so happy that she could care less about what Grace did.

"Mia, I am just so, so sorry about that. I just don't know what to say."

She gives me a big hug, "Oh Ana. Don't worry about it. It will be one of those things that everyone looks back on and has a good laugh about. Besides I know exactly how she learned the word. Mom will probably take him out behind the wood shed the next time he lets it fly."

Christian takes Mia in his arms and pulling her to him, gives her a big hug rocking her in his arms and kisses her head. "I love you, Mimi." He whispers to her. She beams up at her big brother and I can see her eyes welling with tears.

"I'm glad that's over with. "I look up at Christian. "Are you okay?" I ask him.

"Yeah, I'm fine. I'm trying to avoid my mother right now." His eyes are darting around the crowd.

"You know she's going to chew you a new one, don't you?" I warn him.

"If I'm lucky that's all she'll do." He guides me toward the tent, "Come on let's go find our seats and get the kids settled."

"Oh, Christian, look." I stop him and hold out my hand. "Look what was in Grace's purse."

"Are you kidding me? Grace had it?" Christian looks down at his daughter, "Grace, did you take your mother's ring?"

She gives him a sheepish smile and looks at him through those dark lashes with those blue eyes and shakes her head. "No. Mine Daddy."

"Grace that is not your ring. It belongs to your mother. You shouldn't have taken it. You should never, never take something that doesn't belong to you. Do you understand me?" he is really being stern with her. "We'll talk about this again when we get home young lady."

"I couldn't tell if I was crying over Mia and Ethan or because I found my ring." I give him a big hug.

We find our table and get the kids seated and something to drink. Christian isn't partaking of the cocktails. The kids are having their non-alcoholic drinks and I am definitely dipping into the wine.

"Well, sweetheart, are you glad Mia is finally married?" I ask Christian.

"I am since she's pregnant," he scowls.

Ethan and Mia have their first dance. They look so perfect together. Mia is gorgeous and Ethan is a blonde god. They look so happy. After the dance is over, dinner is finally served. It's delicious. Teddy keeps wanting to know where the cake is. I try to explain that he can't have any until Mia and Ethan cut it. It's not sinking in.

Mia and Ethan take their place at the head table along with Grace and Carrick and Mr. and Mrs. Kavanaugh. Carrick stands up and quiets the crowd.

"Family and dear friends. Today we are honored to celebrate the marriage of our daughter Mia to her groom, Ethan. There are a lot of familiar faces out there, and I want to tell you all how pleased we are to welcome you here today.

"I lift my glass to honor my daughter on this her wedding day. It is hard to find the right words to express the depths of my feelings. She was a gift from God and I will always be grateful to have been given the honor of being her father. Mia has been like a ray of warm sun light on my soul from the day God gave her to us. A father sometimes doubts this day will ever come, and sometimes he fears it. However, now, she begins a new chapter in her life and there will be another man to whom she will turn for love and protection. But I want her to know she will always be my little girl and her father will always be there for her.

"Mia, I love you and I hope you have a marriage as fulfilling and wonderful as the one your mother and I have enjoyed throughout the years." Carrick turns to look at Grace. " Marriage is a long-term commitment, but through the good and the bad, it's such a blessing to have the love of your life standing by your side. Grace, I love you my darling." He looks back to Mia and Ethan. "Mia, I know that you and Ethan will honor and appreciate the covenant of marriage that you've entered into today and have many years of love and happiness ahead.

"Ethan, every Father hopes his daughter will find a reliable, sensible, and considerate partner and as much as you try not to interfere in their lives, you always hope your children will make the right choices in life. Mia chose Ethan.

"I have found that Ethan is reliable, sensible and considerate. I think Mia has made an excellent choice and I welcome Ethan to the Grey Clan. Ethan, we know you will take good care of our little girl. She's a feisty one, that's for sure. But she's also loving and caring, and I know the two of you will be very happy together. It is with great joy that we welcome you to our family on this special day. May God continue to bless Mia and Ethan and grant them safety, love, and happiness all the days of their lives. Without further ado, I'd like everyone to raise your glasses in honor of the bride and groom – here's to many years of love and laughter ahead!"

Everyone drinks to Mia and Ethan. Mr. Kavanaugh toasts the happy couple. The Maid of Honor and Best Man make their toasts and finally Christian stands to toast his sister and her new husband.

"I toast my sister, Mia to honor her wedding day, but more important in memory of the years we have spent together. My heart is filled with unspeakable pride. The memories of all we shared growing up will be with me always and you will be part of my life forever."

"To Ethan, who today has become the husband of my sister. I welcome you to our family, and promise that from this day forward, you shall be like a brother to me.

"So congratulations to Mia and Ethan. I would not be standing here, giving them my blessing if I did not believe that Ethan is the perfect husband for my little sister. Sis. I've never seen you look more beautiful and radiant than you do today. I love you Mimi. Congratulations, to both of you."

"And now a toast to my parents. Mom, Dad, we share the joy of this day and the love for the woman who is your daughter and my sister. I know she and Elliott join with me to express our thanks for all you have done for us, and all you have done to make this day a reality and a dream that has come true. I love you, more than you know."

He can be so eloquent and gracious. I could never in a million years have stood up and said all of that. He's such a good role model for Teddy.

After the toasts and speeches have been made, Carrick announces the first dance. Mia dances with Carrick and Ethan with his mother. Then the band leader announces the next dance is for the bride and groom and the bridal party. It's a waltz. Mia has chosen that Butterfly Waltz. I freeze because I have never learned to waltz. Christian stands up and holds out his hand to me. I shake my head, "I can't."

"What?" he leans in to me.

"Christian. I can't. I don't know how to waltz." I don't know what to do. I'm petrified.

"Yes you do," he gives me a sweet smile.

"No. I don't." I insist. "I've never learned to waltz."

He takes my hand and pulls me to my feet. "You only need two things to be able to waltz." He tells me as he leads me to the floor. "You need to be able to count to three. And you need a partner that knows how to waltz." He smiles down at me as he takes me in his arms. "Just hold on to me, baby."

The music begins and Christian holds me tight, counts to three and begins to move. All of a sudden I'm gliding across the floor like in a fairy tale. How does he make everything so easy? I smile up at him and I'm sure he can see the relief on my face.

"Thank you, Christian." I whisper to him. "You saved my life."

"Baby, haven't you learned yet? All you ever have to do is hold on to me and we can do anything."


	16. Chapter 16

_**Fifty Shades…Full Circle**_

_**Chapter 16**_

After our waltz is complete, and somehow we have learned a life lesson from it, we head back to our table and our children. The band begins to play and everyone is welcomed to the floor to dance. About the time I get seated and take a sip of wine, Teddy walks over to me and taps me on the shoulder, "Mother?"

I look around at him, "Yes sweetheart?"

"May I have this dance?" he asks.

I'm speechless, but of course I accept. "Of course, Teddy." I look over at Christian who has a smile on his face and pride beaming in his eyes. My little boy takes my hand and leads me to the dance floor and then takes my right hand in his left and puts his right hand around my waist, well actually he can only reach my hip, and I put my left hand on his little shoulder. Then he begins to lead me around the floor, or a small portion of it. He's a bit stiff and our steps are really small but he's doing his best.

"Teddy, where did you learn to dance?" I ask him so amazed at what he's doing.

"Dad taught me. He said I should ask you to dance at the wedding."

"May I say that you dance very well, Mr. Grey," I tell him.

"I know," he says without skipping a beat. "Dad said I'm a natural."

"Well I think your daddy may just be right about that. You know you look very handsome tonight."

"Gail said I was handsome too. She said I was so handsome that I was going to murder ladies when I grow up. What does that mean Mom?" he looks a little perplexed.

I try not to laugh, "I think she probably said that you would be a lady killer. That means that you are so handsome that you will break ladies hearts."

"Oh... Why would I want to do that?" he asks.

"Well, I hope you won't. You always need to be kind and respectful to everyone and try not to hurt people's feelings. But sometimes a lady can think that she really likes a man just because he is very handsome. And sometimes a man can….well sort of take advantage of that."

"How?"

"Oh, dear I think this is your father's territory. But…. Well sometimes a man can pretend to like a woman just to spend time with her. And if a lady really likes a man, it can hurt her feelings when she finds out that he doesn't really like her, he only pretended to."

"Oh…. But why would he putend to?"

Good heavens, how will I explain this to him? Just as I start to dig myself in deeper, he continues, "Like Janie Paulson, she always wants to hang out with me at recess and sit with me at lunch, but I don't like her and I don't want her to." He makes a face. "I just tell her to go away. I can't even putend to like her," he rolls his eyes up at me.

"Oh, you are so much like your daddy, baby." I give him a big squeeze.

"I am?" he looks pleased.

"Yes, baby. That's exactly what your daddy would do in that situation."

He gives me a big grin, "Gail helped me with my tie. I couldn't remember how to do it," he tells me.

"Well it's a hard thing to learn how to do. It takes a lot of practice to remember how to tie a tie. But it looks very nice," I compliment him.

Looking over I see Christian has taken to the dance floor and he has Grace in his arms holding her little arm out like they are dancing. He is smooching on her neck and she is eating it up. That child has him wrapped around her little finger. No man will ever be as precious to her as her dad. And I know Christian would give his life for her, as well as Teddy. I'm so blessed to have these children and this life with him. For all his flaws, he's the most perfect man in the world to me.

After Teddy finishes his dance with me, he heads back to our table with Grace and Christian grabs me to dance again. This time it's a better tune "The Way You Look Tonight." He is holding me close with his cheek next to mine and humming the song in my ear as we dance. He suddenly begins to softly sing the words next to my ear as we dance, _"Yes you're lovely, with your smile so warm, And your cheeks so soft, There is nothing for me but to love you, And the way you look tonight." _

"Have I told you that you look beautiful in that dress?" He asks.

"No. I don't think so." I look up at his face that is smiling back at me.

"Well, you do. Excellent dress choice," he tells me.

"I didn't pick it, Mia did, but thank you."

"Well actually, it's you that makes the dress look good," he whispers.

"You are a silver tonged devil, Mr. Grey. Do you talk to all the women like this?" I tease him.

"Only the ones I plan to have sex with later, "he nuzzles my neck.

"Sounds like a good plan. Is the equipment working again?" I smirk at him.

"What?" he looks confused.

"When you got home last night, you seemed to be having a bit of equipment failure. You looked like someone had let the air out of your tire."

"Well. That's why I never drink. I can't afford to be out of commission for any length of time." He picks the song back up, _"With each word your tenderness grows, Tearing my fear apart, And that laugh that wrinkles your nose, It touches my foolish heart."_

"I should have taken a picture of it." I giggle at him. " It looked rather pitiful Mr. Grey. I'm glad to hear it has recovered."

"I'll thank you not to make light of my manhood, Madame_. "Lovely, never, ever change. Keep that breathless charm. Won't you please arrange it ? Cause I love you, just the way you look tonight."_

"When did you teach Teddy to dance?" I ask.

"Oh, one afternoon a week or so ago. I thought it was about time for him to acquire a little joie de vivre. Wouldn't hurt for him to pick up a few of the social graces. It's about time for him to start some form of piano lessons as well," he lets me know.

"Have you asked him about that?"

"Nope. Just something he needs to do." He shakes his head. "I don't want him to grow up to be socially coarse. There are certain expectations you know."

As we turn around the floor I notice Teddy dancing with his grandmother. Grace is beaming as she keeps up with him. "Christian. Look." I nod over in their direction.

"That's my boy. Maybe he'll keep her busy and she'll leave me alone."

"You think that will work?" I ask him.

"Nope. Not really. When Grace Trevelyan-Grey gets something on her mind, she can't be deterred." He looks a bit worried.

"How are you holding up?" I ask him.

"Tired. But I'm okay. I think my headache is finally gone."

"That's good. Listen when we get home we need to discuss something."

He rolls his eyes, "Why do you do that?"

"Do what?" I ask.

"Tell me that you want to talk when we get home. It's like telling me that I'm going to get a spanking when my father gets home. It leaves a cloud hanging over the rest of the day."

"Well I'm sorry. I had no idea talking to me was so painful."

"Baby, it's not." He shakes his head as he looks down at me. "It's just that you know how fond I am of conversation. And if it weren't about something distasteful, you'd talk about it now."

"Well excuse me. But it is important and, well, it may be a little distasteful. But we need to talk about it."

"Can't you just tell me what it's about?" he asks.

"It's about Elliott, Sweetheart."

"Elliott? What about Elliott?" he has a frown on his face.

"Christian, did you know that Elliott is staying at Escala quite frequently?" I ask him.

"Yes. Yes I did," he nods. "Why?"

"Well. Kate seems to think he is having an affair," I tell him.

"I see." Christian nuzzles his nose against my hair and gives my neck a quick kiss.

"Is that all? Just, I see?" I ask him.

"What do you want me to say?"

"Well. Is Elliott having an affair?" I try to keep my voice low.

"Baby, I have no idea. I'm sure I'd be the last person he'd tell and I really don't get involved in his personal life."

"Well I don't like the idea of providing him a place to cheat on Kate." I'm trying to keep my voice down.

"You don't know that he's cheating on Kate. "

"Look. I'd like access to view some of the security tapes over there. I need to see if anyone is over there with him."

"You'd like to see or Kate would like to see?" he asks.

"I'd like to see….with Kate."

"So you want me to spy on my brother? Is that what you're asking?"

"No, the tapes are already made. I just want to see them."

"You don't call that spying?"

"I call it finding out what's going on. Christian I don't want us making it easy for Elliott to cheat on Kate."

"You don't know that he is cheating on Kate."

"Well, Kate suspects it and a wife usually is right about those things."

"Oh, well. If Kate suspects it's true then it must be true," he says so sarcastically.

"Don't mock me. You know what I mean. Can you ask him?" I insist.

"No. I can't ask him."

"Why not?"

"Because it's none of our business," he almost whispers. "That's between Elliott and Kate."

"But he's doing it at our apartment. I can't condone that."

"Condone what? You don't know there's anything to condone or not condone."

"Well I want to know. I need to know."

"No you don't. You don't need to know," he scolds me.

"Oh, for heaven's sake. This is why I wanted to wait to talk about this." I roll my eyes at him. "I don't want our home turned into some sort of fuck pad for Elliott."

Christian stops dancing and looks at me. "What? First of all Escala is not our home, our home is in Hunt's Point. Second, I didn't give him access to the penthouse; I let him use the corporate condo. Third, it's not a fuck pad, whatever that is," he resumes dancing.

"I forgot about the corporate condo. Well, you know what I'm talking about. I won't provide him with a place to cheat on my best friend."

"Oh, baby. Stop worrying. Whatever it is they'll work it out. I doubt it's serious. Elliott isn't a total idiot." Christian softly kisses my hair and pulls me closer.

"I know. I just hate seeing Kate so unhappy." I snuggle up next to him with my arms around his neck. "Christian, look at that. He's dancing with Mia now." I nod over to our son, Twinkle Toes Grey.

"I think I've created a monster."

Finally, to Teddy's delight, Mia and Ethan cut their wedding cake. I'm so glad they decided to forgo mashing it into each other's face. I do believe Teddy is first in line to get a piece. He's so sweet. He brings his cake back to the table to eat it and he brings a piece for Grace as well. Christian has chosen to eat the Groom's cake as it is chocolate. I grab his fork and steal a bite.

"Mmm. That's really good." I tell him as I stuff a second bite in my mouth.

"Go get your own piece. I want this," he chastises me.

"I wish we had ice cream," Teddy comments. I look over at him and he has icing all over his face. Grace isn't faring any better and has it not only on her face but her hands as well. She's looking a little rough, but she's having a good time. She has a huge oversized bow in her hair and it's beginning to slide off, only hanging by a few strands.

Looking across the next table at Kate and Elliott, it looks like nuclear winter. Catching Elliott's eye, "Elliott, dance with me?" I ask him even though it really isn't a request.

Christian leans over and whispers. "I know what you're going to do and just don't. Leave it alone."

I just roll my eyes at him, "Don't worry."

Elliott gives me look I don't quite understand, but agrees and we get up and go to the dance floor. He's a nice guy and I really like him, but I have several things to say to the other Mr. Grey.

"Okay, Ana. What's on your mind?" he asks.

"Why does anything have to be on my mind, Elliott?" I ask him as we dance. Elliott is a good dancer but I'm used to dancing with Christian.

"Come on, Ana. I know you, babe. What is it?" he smiles down at me as we dance.

"I'm not happy that you just dumped Christian on the front porch last night."

"What?" he asks and looks down at me. "I didn't dump him. I let him out and he was putting the code in the door. He waved me away and I left."

"Well, he never got the code in the door. Security had to call me to tell me he was on the porch and sick." I scold him. "I assume you had been drinking as well."

"Yes. I had partaken of some alcohol. And before you start in on me driving while intoxicated, I wasn't that drunk."

"Elliott, you know how absolutely opposed Christian is to driving while drinking. He won't even drink after having one glass of wine. You both could have been killed or killed someone else."

"Well for one, I don't have a driver that is at my beck and call. Second I wasn't dri…"he hesitates. "Just take my word for it, it was okay."

"You could have called Sawyer. His number is in Christian's phone. And who the hell was driving Elliott?" I demand. "Did you two have those strippers in the car with you?"

"Ana, don't worry. Christian messing around isn't something you need to worry about. I think he'd cut his dick off before he'd put it anywhere else. He's always been weird about sex. I've never been able to figure it out. He's just not interested."

"Oh, Elliott, I can assure you he is interested." I tell him.

"Ana, the guy never had a date until he met you. He doesn't look at women. Hell, he has women throwing themselves at him on a regular basis and he never even glances at them. What's that all about?"

"I don't find it strange that a husband is not interested in other women." I admonish him. "In fact I think it's highly admirable."

"Ouch. That was meant for me I assume."

"If it fits. Elliott, he was drunk. I don't like that you put him in a bad situation, both with the girls and driving him home after drinking."

"Ana, look. I love you, but he's my brother. I'd just like to see him loosen up and have a good time for once in his life. He's always just been so pent up. He never just cuts loose and throws inhibitions out the window and has a good time."

"Elliott, I can appreciate that. But trust me he does. We just do it together." I tell him. "He doesn't have to fuck a lot of strange women to have fun. I'd love for Christian to be able to cut loose and have a good time with the guys. But I was thinking more like watching a game, drinking some beer and talking some trash."

"Ana, he does that occasionally, to a certain extent. I mean not to the extent that most guys do, but he can fit in," he explains. "Shit he's not far from turning 36 fucking years old and we've never just gone out and tied one on and blown it out."

"Elliott, I understand that, but the time to do that was when he was 20, not 36 and married with two children." I tell him. "And you either. Look, I don't know what's going on, and it's none of my business, but don't hurt Kate. Whatever's going on, she loves you and she never loved anybody until you. Don't fuck her over. She doesn't deserve it."

"You're right. It's none of your business." I stop and back up to glare at him.

About that time I feel Christian put his arm around my waist, "I'm cutting in. Looks like someone needs rescuing," he says, "and I'm not sure which one it is."

Christian takes me in his arms and we finish out the dance and Elliott returns to his table and Kate." So which one of you is the bloodiest?" he asks.

"I think it's a draw." I tell him.

"I warned you. But you just never listen to me," he scolds me. "This isn't something you need to get involved in."

"Christian, you know what's going on, don't you?" I ask him.

He slowly nods his head. "But I can't tell you. Just please, don't get involved. Let Elliott and Kate work it out."

"What if they can't?" I want to cry.

"If they can't, they can't. But I have every faith that they will. Don't push it. Let them take care of it."

After our dance ends we go back to the table and our kids. Christian has his arm over the back of my chair and I lean back against him. He puts both arms around me and kisses my head as we watch our children devour the cake. Ethan makes his speech thanking everyone for being here, expressing his gratitude to the parents for their support and once again professing his undying love for his new wife. After that they slip upstairs to change, they reappear and Mia throws her bouquet. Lily catches it, then Mia and Ethan quickly depart for their honeymoon in Paris. Mia has always loved Paris, can't get enough of it.

The band announces a last dance and it's getting late. Glancing out of my eye I see Christian's mother headed toward our table. She looks absolutely beautiful in a pale coral chiffon gown and matching sequined jacket. "Look out. Incoming to your left." I murmur to him.

"Oh, fuck," he whispers.

"That's what got you in trouble to start with." I tell him. "Just go face the music and get it over with."

"Hello everyone. Are you having a good time?" Grace asks as she approaches the table.

"Grace everything is just lovely. I don't see how it could have been more perfect." I stand up and give her a big hug.

"I can think of one thing that could have gone better. Christian. Dance with me. Now." Yes, Mr. CEO is about to get a spanking and I can't help but try to suppress a smile.

"Yes, mother. I'd be delighted." Christian sighs as he stands and buttons his jacket then takes his mother in his arms as they hit the dance floor.

I can see by the look on his face that he is in pain and Grace is inflicting it. She is about the only person in the world that can make him do anything, other than his daughter. I wish I had camera to capture this moment. I want to say he looks like a little boy getting a good talking to, but he doesn't, he just looks pissed off. Oh, well it will do him good to endure a lecture.

The song ends and Grace reaches up and strokes Christian's cheek as her expression softens. He looks as if he has relented, but I feel sure it's just to appease his mother. He gives her a quick kiss on her cheek and heads back to our table. He unbuttons his jacket as he sits back down.

"Glad that's over with," he sighs.

"Are you forgiven?" I ask him.

"No. Just on probation," he grumbles.

"Good. Then I won't have to do it." I grin over at him.

"How is it that mothers know how to make you feel like a major disappointment while at the same time making you feel like the most important person in the world?" he asks me.

"It's a gift." I tell him.

"Are you about ready to go?" he asks.

"Yep. I'm dying to get out of this dress and into something comfortable."

"Me too. But I'm ready to get into you," he says under his breath.

"Okay, you get Grace and I'll wrangle Teddy." I tell him.

Christian walks around and picks Grace up in his arms. Gathering her infamous purse and her little sweater. "Okay Mr. Astaire. Are you ready to go?" I ask Teddy.

"Can we dance some more before we go?" Teddy asks.

"No baby. The band has finished. They're packing up to leave. Get your jacket and let's head home. It's way past your bed time."

We get the kids and say goodbye to the Kavanaughs and Carrick and Grace. I give Kate a big hug and Elliott a less than big hug. I promise to call Kate and talk later. We get the kids home and in bed and we go in to get out of our dress clothes. By the time I'm out of that dress I never want to see again, Christian is already in his PJ bottoms and is on the bed tapping away on his laptop again. I get on the bed and crawl over to him and kiss his ear and neck.

"Mmmm. I like that," he smiles and says as he continues tapping away.

"Any way I can convince you to get off of that computer?" I ask him.

He looks over at me with a wicked smile, "You can put those shoes on."

I think for a second, "Okay. I can do that." Then get up and go into my dressing room. I strap on the black stilettos with the leather ties. Then I slide out of my gown and into my panties and one of his white shirts draping one of his ties around my neck. Going back to the door to the dressing room I stop and spread eagle in the door stretching my arms above my head on either side of the door frame and spreading my legs apart. Christian glances up and then takes a second look.

"Now that's what I'm talkin' about," he grins at me and closes the laptop setting it aside.

I'm feeling a little playful, so I lean against one side of the door frame and prop my leg up resting my foot against the other side, giving him my best sexy pout.

"Hold on. Just one minute." Christian says as he gets the remote for the iPod and turns it on. He puts on _Pride and Joy,_ by Stevie Ray Vaughn and then leans back against the head board with his arms behind his head, his legs stretched out and crossed in front of him and a huge grin on his face, "Continue."

I take my cue and I begin to dance. I tease him and bend over squeezing my breasts together shaking my shoulders. Then I arch my back and slide down and then back up the door frame. As I start to unbutton shirt I stop then pout and shake my head and quickly button it back up. I move over closer to the bed and turn my back to him with my legs wide apart and then slowly bend over sliding my hands down my legs until they touch my feet. Then I shake my butt at him and slowly slide them back all the way up my body until they rake through my hair and I pull it up letting it tumble back down over my shoulders all the time wiggling my butt at him. I slowly look over my shoulder at him and give him a little smile. He's grinning from ear to ear.

Turning around to face him I slowly start to unbutton the shirt again. Just as I get to the bottom I turn around and the take one side of the shirt and pull it out to the side and then the other. As I turn back to face him, I quickly close the shirt back around me. Christian gets up and crawls across the bed to try to grab me, but I quickly move out of his reach and wag my finger at him telling him, 'no'. I slide my hands over my breasts and abdomen then into my panties, pretending that I am going to remove them, as I continue to do my little dance for him with the shirt open. Just as the song is about over, Christian gets off the bed and comes over scooping me up in his arms and tossing me down on our bed. He follows me down and hovers over me on all fours then straddles me and rips the shirt open baring my breasts. Nuzzling his face in my hair he trails kisses from my neck to my bare breasts nipping me along his way. He sits back up and looks down at me.

I giggle and ask him, "So, in your expert opinion, would I make a good stripper?"

"Nope" he shakes his head.

I swat his arm, "What! Why not?" I ask.

"Well for one thing you don't need a bath," he says looking down at me. " And second. You, I actually want to fuck," he gives me a quick grin.

He slides the tie from around my neck pulling it taught between his hands and looks down at me as if asking permission. I eagerly nod my head and smile at him as I put my hands together and hold out my wrists.


	17. Chapter 17

_**Fifty Shades…Full Circle**_

_**Chapter 17**_

Christian and I are lying on the bed naked, except I still have my shoes on, after a few hours of playtime. It's just amazing what a little tie me up tie me down, ass-spanking sex will do for a body. Christian appears to be as pleased as I am with our little tryst. He's lying on his back with one arm under his head and the other rubbing his ripped stomach. I'm on my tummy propped on my elbows with my knees bent and feet in the air displaying my magical sex shoes. He reaches over and glides his hand over my butt then leans over and gently kisses it, "It's such a beautiful shade of pink baby."

"Why thank you. Hey. You think Ethan and Mia have done it yet?" I giggle and ask him.

"For fuck sake. I don't even want to think about it," he frowns.

"Baby. Why does that bother you so much? Mia's a grown woman?"

"I don't know. It just does. I always looked out after her and was protective of her for so long, it's just hard to stop," he shrugs. "I am well aware that it is unreasonable and irrational, but that's just the way I feel about it."

"I guess I can understand it. I'll probably be the same way when Teddy gets married. God just think about Grace getting married." I know that will get him.

"Stop. Stop. Don't. I can't even think about it," he looks pained and puts his hands over his eyes. "Please don't make me think about that."

"Christian. You're just going to have to get a grip. You've got about twenty or twenty five years to get prepared, so try to be working on it. Please let our little girl have a normal life and that includes sex." I try not to smile.

"Okay. That was way over the line Mrs. Grey." He rolls over and pushes me on my back, grabbing my hands and pulling them over my head while I giggle uncontrollably. He stares down at me just looking at my face for a few moments.

"What?" I ask staring back.

"I sure do love you." Just when I think he's getting romantic," Even when you're being a bitch."

"Me? A bitch? Never." I tease him.

"Yes. You. I should bite your nipples off. It would serve you right for torturing me." he bends down and nips one with his teeth.

"Oww. You'd only be hurting yourself if you did that," I tell him.

"Humm. Probably right. I do like them right where they are." He gives me a quick kiss and releases me.

"Christian. Not to spoil this mood, but I need to talk to you about something," I tell him getting serious.

"Fuck. Here we go again. What?" he asks.

"Don't get pissy. I wanted to tell you that I called Paul and accepted the job yesterday."

"Okay." He nods. "Anything else?"

"I start the first of next month." I tell him.

"Okay. Anything else?"

"I have to go to Sacramento for a couple of days the first of next month."

"How many days?"

"One or two….maybe three."

"Okay. What for?"

"I need to go through HR and then meet my staff and meet with some of the authors I'll be working with."

"Okay. Sounds reasonable," he says.

"It does? You're not mad?" I'm amazed.

"Well should I be? I agreed to try to support you in this. And I'm a man of my word," he tells me. "You can take Charlie Tango to go down there."

"Well…I can't."

"You're not taking a commercial flight. I won't let you do that."

"No. I'm not flying commercial. Actually Paul is flying out and he is going to pick me up on his way." I hold my breath for the fallout.

"I don't think so. Besides Seattle is not on the way to Sacramento, unless you're coming from Alaska or Canada." You can take Charlie Tango."

"Christian I can't do that."

"Why the fuck not?" he asks.

"Because, Paul is my boss and I doubt he would like me taking my private transportation. Besides I'm sure it will be a good opportunity to have a conversation about things. You know, plans, expectations. Things of that sort." Sounds like a reasonable excuse to me.

"Nope. Don't like it," he's pretty firm.

"Christian. Don't start giving me grief over this." I sit up to talk.

"I'm not giving you grief. How would you feel if I took a female employee with me on a three day business trip?"

"You do it all the time." I tell him.

"Ros does not count," he raises his voice.

"Why not?"

"You know very well why not. Don't be ridiculous," he scolds me.

"Well. Paul could be gay." I tell him.

He rolls his eyes to glare at me sideways. "Do you really believe that?"

"I have no way of knowing. Beside he's my boss and a gentleman. He'd never do anything inappropriate." I tell him. "Just like you would never do anything inappropriate with your employees. Would you?"

"You know better than that. How am I going to send Sawyer with you if you don't take Charlie Tango?"

"You aren't going to send Sawyer with me. That's how."

"Oh yes. Sawyer will be accompanying you to Sacramento, Mrs. Grey."

"Oh, no he won't." I insist. "Christian this is my job. Don't fuck it up for me. Please."

"I'll think about it."

I move over and kiss his neck. "Please don't be mad Mr. Grey. I promise to be a very, very good girl."

"That won't work." he groans. "Well maybe a little bit." He pulls me over on to him and wraps his arms around me and seals his mouth over mine as his tongue dances with mine. He slides his tongue over my lips teasing me as I fist my hands in his hair and crawl up to straddle him. Once again he is mine and I am his.

Christian and I are absolutely spent after last night, the wedding today and then our sexcapades this evening. We drift off holding each other naked on top of our bed. I wake up to a soft little tapping at our door. "Mom?" I can hear Teddy's little voice.

"Just a minute baby." I call to him. Reaching down I quickly grab my silk robe from the foot of the bed and throw it on. "Christian." I nudge him.

"What?" he groans waking up.

"Baby, Teddy's at the door. Put your pants on." I whisper to him.

"Shit. Okay." He reaches down on the floor and grabs his boxers and slides into them as I grab the covers and we jump underneath them.

"Okay, sweetie. Come on in." I tell him. He peers around the door at us. "What do you need sweetheart?"

"I can't go to sleep," he walks in rubbing his little eyes. "Can I get in bed with you?" he asks.

"Sure baby. Come here." I stretch my arms out to him.

"Ana this isn't good. He needs to be in his own bed," Christian murmurs to me.

"Just for a few minutes. Then he can go back to his room." I whisper back.

Teddy runs in and throws himself on the bed then crawls up between us and gets under the covers. I put my arms around him pulling him to me. "Thanks , Mom," he says as he snuggles up next to me. Christian turns on his side facing the other direction and lets out a big sigh, "Just 'till you go to sleep, okay buddy?"

"I think you had too much sugar and excitement too late in the evening," I stroke his hair and then kiss his head.

I'm just about asleep, "Mom?" Teddy says quietly.

"Yes, baby?"

"Mom, why do you have your shoes on in bed?" he asks. I was hoping he wouldn't catch that. I was scrambling so fast to get dressed, I forgot to take them off.

"Teddy, go to sleep," Christian growls at him.

"Okay, Dad."

Christian walks back into our room and slides out of his boxers and back into bed after returning Teddy to his room. I have taken my sex shoes off while he was gone and snuggled back in. Christian pulls me to him his front to my back, and kisses my neck as he gets comfortable again.

"Thanks for taking him back to bed." I groan at him half asleep.

"Mmmm. I don't want him making a habit out of getting in to bed with us."

"I won't. Hey, thanks for saving me on the shoe question."

"It was just easier to dismiss him than to try to think up a good answer."

"I doubt there is a good answer to that."

He snorts, "At least he didn't see you lashed to the bed."

"You know one day when he is older he is going to think back on stuff like that and put two and two together."

"You mean he's going to figure out I've been fucking his mother all these years?" I can feel him grinning against my neck.

"Something like that. He's gonna' remember these shoes and all that spanking shit and think we're kind of kinky, you know."

"Kind of kinky?" Christian asks. "He'll figure out he has a kinky little mama."

"Christian. That's awful. I don't want our kids thinking things like that. That's embarrassing." I reach back and swat him.

"Why not? It doesn't bother me that I have a kinky little wife," he adds.

"It's only because I have a majorly kinky husband." I reach behind me and swat him.

"Ahh, yes. I've taught you well, Mrs. Grey," he sighs. "Now, go to sleep."

"Christian when you finished getting dressed, will you come down and help me decide where to have this office built?" I ask as he's getting out of the shower and drying his hair.

"Why do you need me?" he asks. "I told you to put it anywhere you want to."

"Because it's our house and you should have a say in what we do to it," I explain.

"Baby I have to make decisions all fucking day, can't you do this? It's your office," he wraps his towel around his waist.

I just glare at him. "Alright. I'll be down shortly," he relents. "Can I have some breakfast?" he asks as I turn to leave.

I turn around and walk back to the bathroom," Have I ever denied you any breakfast? Of course you can have some breakfast. What do you want?" I ask him.

"I don't care. Whatever you want to fix," he says lathering his face.

"You're being awfully submissive this morning. Trying to top from the bottom or just don't give a damn?" I ask as I watch him shave.

"Careful or I'll show you who's in control," he looks at me in the mirror as he raises his razor to his face.

"Mmmm." I unconsciously start to mimic his facial movements as he shaves. "I'm quaking in my boots."

"Oh, when Liz comes out next week to go over the plans for the office, have her get us a new bed," he tells me.

"A new bed?" I frown over at him. "Why do you want a new bed?"

"Haven't you noticed? This one has gotten a squeak in it. I hate a bed that squeaks. It makes me lose my concentration," he says in all seriousness.

"What? It makes you lose your concentration?" I ask.

"Yep. You know, squeak, squeak, squeak. I hate that," he says.

"What do you have to concentrate on?" I ask him. I'm bewildered.

"You know?" he makes forward pumping motion with his fist a couple of times.

"Oh. I didn't know it was something you had to concentrate on," I tell him. "I just thought it came naturally to you." I'm trying to be serious.

"Well it does. It's just ….it's distracting…you know," he tries to explain. "All that squeaking sort of…you know… takes your mind off of things," he shrugs and returns to his shaving.

"Humm. I see. I had no idea you could be distracted during …you know…" I make a forward pumping motion with my fist a couple of times mimicking him.

He stops shaving and glares at me for a moment. I giggle at him, "Can't we just get it fixed? Do we have to buy a whole new bed?" I ask.

"I don't give a fuck what we do as long as the fucking squeaking stops," he lets me know.

"Yes, sir. I will make a note to attend to it. Anything else I can do for you this morning, Mr. Grey?" I ask before turning to go downstairs.

"No. That will do it. You can go now," he teases.

"Yes, sir. Breakfast in thirty minutes." I tell him. "Oh, one more thing." I stop and go back to the bathroom. "Will you talk to Grace today please?"

"About what?" he asks.

"About good words and bad words. You know the old 'do as I say not as I do', talk." I smirk at him.

"I can't do that," he flatly tells me.

"Why not?" I ask.

"Because. Talking to Grace is your job," he explains.

"But I'm not the one who curses in front of her," I tell him.

"But ….."

"Yes?" I ask. "Is there a problem?"

"Umm. No….I just…I have no idea what to say to her. Do I have to tell her what fuck means?" he asks.

"Don't you dare! Just explain that it's a bad word and that she shouldn't say bad words, even though her father is the original garbage mouth and has no regard for what he says in front of his children." I try not to smile. "She'll understand."

He finishes his shaving and washes off his face and dries it, "You can talk to her about taking things that don't belong to her, since she took your ring."

"You already told her that you'd talk to her about that," I remind him. He gives me a nasty look. "Okay, okay. How about we sit down with her together and do it? Maybe this morning after breakfast."

"That's better." He finished drying his face and leans over to give me a quick kiss.

"I'll have breakfast in about thirty minutes. Get dressed."

I've gotten breakfast ready and on the table. I love our Sunday breakfasts. We're all here together and in a good mood. Christian isn't working and he's relaxed and rested.

"OKAY. EVERYBODY TO THE TABLE. BREAKFAST IS READY."

My family comes bounding to the table in a herd. We get the kids settled and food on their plates. Looking around our breakfast table I almost get teary, seeing my little family. They're all talking and smiling and Christian is laughing and joking with the kids. Life can be so good sometimes. The kids are healthy, thank God. I have a husband that adores me and he's handsome and we want for nothing. He takes such good care of us. He provides for us and protects us and loves us. I can feel my eyes begin to well and I can't take them off of my husband.

"Sweetheart? Ana, what's wrong?" I can hear him ask.

"Huh? Oh nothing. Just thinking. Eat before it gets cold."

"Sure?" he asks.

"Yep. Eat."

"Oh, babe. I got my jacket and tie back from Elliott. They were in his car. Can you make sure they get to the cleaners for me?" he asks.

"Sure, are they in your closet in the 'go to the cleaner' pile?" I ask him.

"Yep. My phone was in my jacket pocket. Thank God, Elliott had them." He shakes his head. "I hate not being in control of my faculties. Do you know what could have happened if I had lost that phone?"

"You empire would have crumbled?" I ask facetiously.

He looks cross at me, "Baby, I have everything in that phone. That and it's the number where people can reach me on urgent matters."

"Maybe you shouldn't keep everything in something that can be lost so easily."

"That's what they're for. To keep everything in one place," he reminds me.

We finally get finished and Teddy gets down from the table, "Can I go outside and play in the back yard?"

"Sure baby. Be careful." I tell him.

"Me too." Grace jumps out of her chair.

"Grace. Wait. Daddy and I want to talk to you a minute sweetie." I grab her arm as she runs by my chair. Christian has horror written on his face. "Let's go in the family room for a few minutes."

Christian and I get up and the three of us walk to the family room and sit on the sofa. I pull Grace up into my lap and look over to Christian to start. He just stares at me, mute.

"Okay, well. Grace, do you remember yesterday when you were running up to the alter and you fell?" I ask her.

"What's an otter?" she asks.

"It's the place up front where Aunt Mia and Uncle Ethan and mommy and daddy and everyone were standing during the wedding."

"Oh. Ukay."

"Do you remember when you fell?" I ask her.

"Uh huh," she nods.

"Do you remember what you said when you fell down?" I ask her.

"Uh huh. I say the fuck wood," she says so sweetly.

"Yes, baby, you did." I hug her and play with her hair as I talk to her. "Well, that's not a word that little girls say."

"Why?" she asks.

"Because that's not a very nice word," I tell her

"Why?" she asks. "What doth it mean?"

"It's just a word that little girls and boys should never say. It's a bad word."

"But, daddy says it," she points over to Christian.

"Well, Daddy is a grown up and he is old enough to decide if he wants to say it or not."

"Duth daddy have potty mouf?" she asks.

"Well, sometimes." I agree with her. "But sweetheart, you can' t say it anymore. It's a bad word and I don't want to hear you say it again."

"But why?" Evidently, I'm not getting through to her.

I look over at Christian.

"Look. I'm going to make this easy. I don't care who uses that word, Grace, you are never to say it again. And if you do there will be consequences. Do you understand me?" he sternly asks her.

She begins to get teary and pouts. Looking up at him through her lashes, she nods.

"Grace, do you know what consequences are?" I ask her.

She slowly shakes her head.

"It means you will get punished." Christian tells her. I roll my eyes over at Mr. Sensitive. "Now are we clear on this?" he asks.

Grace nods. "I go my woom now?" she asks.

I give her a big hug and let her down. She takes off running to the stairs and up to her room.

"Christian. She's not an employee that you need to control. What are you going to do if she says it again….fire her? She needs to understand why she can't do something." I try to explain.

"Well, evidently that approach wasn't working. It's handled," he says.

"She isn't something to be handled. She's a little girl."

"Look that's the way my father handled us and that's the way I handle them," he tells me.

"So when your dad just told you not to do something, what did you do?" I ask him.

He shrugs, "I did what I wanted to do. I didn't pay any attention to him. I took my punishment and then went about my business."

"Right. You did it anyway. Maybe if he had explained to you why it was wrong you might not have wanted to run right out and do it again." I try to make him see. "Baby, you need to talk to her. Don't just come down on her."

I put my arms around him. "I don't want her to be afraid of you. I want her to know that she can talk to you and you'll listen. You don't have to do things like your dad did. Find your own way of doing it."

"I've never really had to discipline the kids. I guess I'm not sure how to do it," he hugs me back.

"Well, they're getting older and they are going to start breaking the rules from time to time. We're going to have to deal with it. We just need to find a way to do it and let them know that we still love them."

"Okay. I guess I just go for the 'because I said so' method; the 'don't do it or else' way of handling things," he gives me a quick kiss.

"I know and sometimes it may have to be that way. But let's try to get them to understand why something is wrong, before we revert to a dictatorship." I suggest.

"You're right. I'll work on it. I'm just used to running a dictatorship. It works for me."

"Yes. I know, Mr. Potty Mouth." I tease him.

"Look I'll go up and talk to her. I don't want her to be upset over this," he says.

"Okay. I'll get breakfast cleaned up." I swat him on the but as he turns to go upstairs to talk to his daughter.

After the kitchen is cleaned, I go out to check on Teddy. He's enjoying himself romping and playing outside. I really wish he had more friends to play with. He's such a sweet little boy, even if he is mine. Christian sure has been up with Grace for a long time. I'll go check on them and then get Christian's things together to go to the cleaners tomorrow. I walk up the stairs and down the hall to Grace's door. Stopping I peek around the corner to see what they are talking about.

Christian is sitting in the floor with Grace. He has her pink headband on. The one with the big pink bow attached to it. He is holding her bunny in his lap and he is giving bunny a sip of pretend tea from a tiny china tea cup. Grace has laid out her little antique Haviland Limoges china tea set that Grace and Carrick gave her for Christmas and she is having tea with Christian and bunny. It's the most precious thing I've ever seen.

"No, daddy, no. Bunny has to have sugar," she shakes her head and scolds him as he is giving bunny his tea.

Christian stops and Grace takes the top off of her little sugar bowl and pretends to put some in the cup. Christian goes to put the cup to Bunny's lips again.

"No daddy. You have to stir." Grace insists. Christian looks frustrated and roll his eyes, but he pretends to stir the tea.

"Now?" he asks Grace and she smiles and nods. Christian puts the cup to Bunny's face and pretends to give him some tea. Grace is content.

"Daddy. You have tea." Grace points to Christian's tea cup. Christian just looks at her. "Drink daddy." Grace insists.

Christian reluctantly picks up the cup and starts to put it to his lips. "Do I have to have sugar?" he asks.

Grace shakes her head, "No." Christian pretends to drink his pretend tea, or as Teddy would say his putend tea.

"Hi. Are we having a tea party?" I ask as I walk into Graces room and sit down on her bed.

"Look , Mama. Daddy have tea with me and Bunny." Grace grins over at me.

"I see that. Are you having a good time daddy?" I grin at Christian.

"Lovely," is all he says.

"Do you want tea Mama?" Grace asks me.

"No, I think not. I have just finished having a cup while I cleaned the kitchen. But thank you." I politely tell her.

"Oh, come on mommy. Have a cup." Christian chides me.

"I have work to do. You two enjoy yourselves." I tell them getting up and walking to our bedroom. I walk into Christian's closet and start gathering up his suits for the cleaners. I check the pockets on everything before laying them on the bed. I feel arms around my waist as I'm checking everything. Christian sweetly kisses my neck. "Mmm. That's nice. How did your talk go? Didn't drink too much tea did you?" I ask him as he flops on the bed.

"Okay, I guess. I had to admit that I was….you know…" Christian stammers.  
"Wrong?" I guess. "You used the 'W' word? Christian Grey admitted that he might be wrong to a three year old?" I grin and crawl over on the bed to him.

"Yes. I was wrong to use the word in front of her. I admitted it and hopefully she's too young to remember that I said it."

Said what, 'fuck' or that you were wrong?" I ask.

"That I was wrong." He flashes a big grin and puts his arms around me. "Oh, I talked to her about taking things that don't belong to her, too."

"Good. Do you know how close I came to losing this?" I hold up my hand to look at the ring. "She left that purse everywhere she took it. Half of Seattle could have found this thing."

"Speaking of your ring, we have another anniversary coming up in about a month or so," he reminds me.

"Yes. It seems we've made it another year." I turn over and lean on his chest. "Another wonderful, calm , uneventful year with you Mr. Grey."

He smiles over at me. "Anyone can have a calm peaceful life. It takes real skill to have adventure."

"Could we try a little less skill this coming year?" I ask him.

"You love it and you know it, Mrs. Grey."

"I love you. I know that." I smile back. "Christian, let's just have a quiet anniversary this year. Nothing extravagant or over the top. I don't want any vacation houses or hotels. I just want a quiet evening with my husband this year." I ask him.

"Whatever you want. I'm here to make it happen."

"Is that okay with you? It's your anniversary too." I ask him.

"All I want is to spend it with you. It doesn't matter where or when, just as long as we are together, Mrs. Grey." He looks pensively at me. "I still marvel at the sound of that ,'Mrs. Grey'. I can't believe that you chose me. God only knows why, I'm just glad you did."

"I had no choice but to choose you. You crawled into my heart and refused to leave the moment I laid eyes on you." I tell him. "I hate being away from you even for a moment. Sometimes, when you leave for work, I just wish I was about this big," I use my fingers to measure about an inch," and I could crawl in your pocket and stay with you all day. Go where you go, hear what you say, be next to you all day long."

"Well, I'm glad you're not that big. It would be very hard to make love to a one inch woman. I love you just the way you are. Hey, I think there's a son in there somewhere."

"Billy Joel already did it." I remind him.

"Christian, not to bring up a sore subject, but what's going on with Elliott? You said you knew what was going on," I ask hoping to catch him in a mood to tell me.

"Well, Mrs. Grey, it's like this. My brother discussed something with me in confidence and even though you're my wife, and I never keep secrets from you, I can't break a confidence."

"Hmmm. I had a feeling you were going to say that. Sure you can't just give me a hint?" I ask.

"Nope. Not even a hint." He strokes my hair with his fingers.

"But Kate thinks he's having an affair or lots of random ones." I tell him.

"Baby, I know Kate is unhappy right now, but so is Elliott. I wish I could change that, but I can't. It's up to Elliott to work this out with her. I think they will." He tries to reassure me. "If you have to discuss it with her, you can tell her that Elliott loves her very much. That's all I can say."

"Okay. I admire your loyalty, I guess."


	18. Chapter 18

_**Fifty Shades…Full Circle**_

_**Chapter 18**_

**A/N: Please indulge me this note. I just want to thank all of the lovely readers who have supported this story. You have left the nicest comments and as many of you have found, I read each and every one. They keep me writing. Again, you are all very much appreciated. That being said….**

Elliott, Gia, Liz and I are wandering through the house trying to decide on a good place to put the office. There is a problem with every site that we discuss. Structural issues or wrong location. Elliott even suggested erecting a separate building adjacent to the house for it, but I want to be able to work on weekends and still watch the kids, so it needs to be in the house, but in a quiet place. Elliott suggests, like Christian did, that I just convert the library into an office. First off I like having the library and second it's way too big. It has books floor to ceiling, polished mahogany walls, a fire place and a powder room. Amber leaded glass French doors lead out to a natural stone covered patio and an English garden. I don't want to change it. It doesn't go with the contemporary décor of the rest of the house, but I loved it and wanted to leave the original design when we redid the house. I love coming in here to spend time. It transports me to another place and time.

Gia suggests just moving in with Christian and sharing his office. I nix that right away. Mr. CEO does not share office space and I would never be able to concentrate with him in there yelling over the phone at some poor, unfortunate employee on the other end.

We finally decide to compromise and take a portion of Christian's office and a portion of the library to make a new space for me. "Do you think , Mr. Grey will be okay with us taking part of his office?" Gia asks.

"Well, I've asked him umpteen times to help me decide and he always tells me that he doesn't care and to do what I want. So, this is what we'll do. He'll just have to live with it."

"When will you need it Ana?" Liz asks.

"I start work the first of next month. Is there any way it can be finished by then?" I ask.

"Whew." Elliott runs is hands through his hair. "I'm not sure about that Ana. We'll try. Liz has to come up with a design and then Gia has to get the plans drawn up. Then I have to get the materials and the crew to get started on it. I doubt it seriously, but we'll make a valiant effort."

"I know it's short notice. We'll just do the best we can." I tell them. "I'll let you three take it from here. Liz and I have talked and she knows what I'm wanting so I'll leave it to all of you. Just let Gail know when you'll need access to get started. Oh, Liz before you leave can you come up to the bedroom with me, please?"

"Sure, let's go. Gia, Elliott I'll have my assistant get with you and we can work out a time to get together on this. I already have some ideas, so it shouldn't take me too long to have a design sketched up for you," she tells them.

Liz and I head up the stairs to our bedroom. "Are you wanting to redo the bedroom, Ana?" she asks.

"No. It seems the bed has a squeak and Christian wants a new bed." I look at her while trying to keep a serious face.

"Well, I'll be glad to get you a new bed, but I think we can fix the squeak if that's all that's bothering him."

"That was my suggestion too. Let's try that first. If it can't be fixed then we can try a new bed."

"Okay. Where is the squeak? " she asks.

"I don't know. It bothers Christian, not me. " I tell her. I jump on the bed and try to bounce up and down as Liz walks around looking and listening.

"I think I do hear something. Okay. I'll get someone out here to take a look and see what can be done," she smiles at me.

"Good. Now, and I hate to do this, but we need to have the nursery redecorated. Let's go look at it." Liz and I head across the hall and I open the door to the empty room with the bare walls.

I feel my eyes well with tears at the thought of changing the last thing that was his. Making it go away. "I think a guest room. Something to go with the house. Contemporary, but warm and cozy. Not masculine or feminine. Can we do that?" I ask.

"Yes. I can come up with something I think you'll like," she tells me. "Ana, I know I've never said anything to you about the baby, but I just didn't know what to say. You have no idea how sorry I am about the everything. I know how much you were looking forward to him," she says.

"Yes. Christian and I and the kids were all very excited and looking forward to bringing him home. But, we're dealing with it. Thank you Liz. I appreciate it." I take her hand and give it a squeeze. "Now, just give me something maybe in some soft warm neutral tones."

"Okay. I'll get something worked up and bring it over to run by you along with the office plans," she gives me a big smile.

"Thank you."

"Now. I need to get back to my office and get to work if we are going to get your office ready in time."

Walking back downstairs I show her out, then notice Elliott sitting at the breakfast bar drinking a cup of coffee. I walk over to him and jump up on a stool next to him. "Hi Elliott. Thanks for coming over on such short notice."

He shrugs, "You're family. Grey's stick together."

I give him a smile and reach over and hug his neck. "I'm sorry." I whisper in his ear. "Look I don't know what's going on with you two. All I know is that Kate loves you. It would break her heart to lose you."

"I know. I don't want to lose Kate either. There are just some things going on right now that I'm dealing with."

"Christian told me that." I tell him.

Elliott looks horrified. "Don't worry. He won't tell me what it is. Just that there are some issues." I try to explain. "I wouldn't ask him to break a confidence and he wouldn't do it anyway. I just hate to see Kate in pain like this."

"I know me too. I will tell you that Christian suggested John Flynn to me and I do have an appointment with him," Elliott confesses.

Good heavens, John Flynn needs to be on a retainer for this family. What he must think of us. "Are you and Kate going together?"

"No just me. It's my issue not hers," he tells me as he takes a sip of his coffee. "We'll work it out. Don't worry, babe," he tries to reassure me.

"Elliott. Just one piece of advice. If something is bothering you, then it's her issue too. Don't wait too long to talk to her about it. Don't let so much damage happen that it's too much to repair."

He stands and hugs me, "I won't. I just need to know how to talk to her about it." He turns to leave, "Oh, Ana. I'm sorry about Christian. I honestly thought he was able to get inside. I'd never just leave him to the wolves."

"I know. I guess sometimes, I'm just overprotective. He's a grown man. And, uh, any chance you're going to tell me who was driving you two home?" I ask him.

"Don't worry. It was one of the hotel employees. They offered to make sure we got home safely, since we had the party there. Part of the bachelor party package. Christian paid her very well to do it."

"And all she did was drive you home?" Well that makes me feel a little better. I just hope driving was all he paid her for.

"Yes. That's all she did. I made that arrangement with the hotel when I booked the room for the party. I wanted to make sure we all got home in one piece. I just didn't want to tell you since it was a woman. I figured you and Kate wouldn't be happy about that and considering our present situation, I doubted that Kate would believe it."

"You were right." I agree with him on that point.

"Ana, you'll never know how much we all think of you. I mean…. Christian was so different growing up and he never seemed interested in having any type of relationship with anyone. Then when he left Harvard and started his business, he worked pretty much 24/7 and still no relationships. We were worried he'd end up going through life by himself. We all, especially Mom and Dad, are so grateful that you care for him so much and have stayed with him."

I give him a strange look. I can't believe what he has just said. "Elliott? I love Christian. I've loved him from the moment I met him. I'm grateful to him for loving me and spending his life with me."

"Look, I'm not very good at saying things. I seem to put my foot in my mouth a lot. All I know is you're the center of his life. Everything revolves around Ana for him."

"It's the same way for me."

"Well, I need to get to work." He gives me a big hug. " Don't worry about Kate and me. We'll get through this."

I nod at him. "I know. Just talk to her please."

I finally have Elliott out the door, and I head up to get the pile of things for the cleaner to pick up this afternoon. As I go to collect them, I see Christian's jacket lying in the floor of his closet. He must have dropped it on the floor instead of stacking it on the pile and I overlooked it when I was sorting through his things. Picking it up I check the pockets and when I reach in the left pocket I feel something. Taking it out, it's a cell phone. Not Christian's phone. Wonder if it belongs to Elliott? He must have given it to Christian to hold or something.

I start to lay it on Christian's dresser, but then decide to check it before I do. Okay, I'm nosey. Flipping open the phone I see it isn't Elliott's. I don't recognize any of the numbers and I look at the texts. Good thing whoever it belongs to hasn't set a password and I can access everything. Nothing out of the ordinary, except for one short text. '_Got them_!' is all it says. I check the pictures and videos. To my horror I see photos that were taken at the bachelor party. They are blurry but there are of Elliott and Ethan and Christian. I don't know the rest of the men there other than Tim Buchannan. They look pretty wasted, but I don't see anything suspicious. I pull up the saved videos and there they are. I see video of the girl that Christian described. Long blonde hair, tattoo on her backside. She is really trying to come on to him. I want to break her arms. Poor Christian looks like he wants to throw up on her. He keeps trying to shove her away. Then she finally sits in his lap straddling him and puts her arms around his neck trying to kiss him. He actually does turn his head and then stands up dumping her on the floor. That's my baby. I guess I feel better. I knew he wouldn't lie to me, but seeing that it happened just like he told me makes me feel better somehow. I thumb through several more and don't see anything suspicious. Just your average bachelor party, drunk men scantily clad girls a lot of music and whooping and hollering.

Someone evidently had a reason to take these. I'll let Christian and Taylor handle this. I set the phone on his dresser. I really want to throw it away, but I'll let him dispose of it. Those pictures could have caused a lot of trouble. I don't know how he got the phone, but I'm glad he did.

I make sure Myra has the things to put out for the cleaners to pick up and I'm in Christian's office looking around, thinking about my office and what I'll need. Hearing the phone ring I go ahead and answer it. I'm really supposed to wait and let Gail or Myra answer, but I don't.

"Grey Residence."

"Ana?"

"Jose! How are you?" I'm thrilled to hear back from him.

"I'm good. You?"

"Great. We got Mia and Ethan married Saturday. I'm so sorry you couldn't make it."

"Me too. But work commitments, you know. Look I'll be coming up to see Dad and I can do the photos, Thursday. How's that for you?" he asks.

"Thursday sounds good. Hey can you stay for dinner? Kate would live to see you. We haven't gotten together in ages."

"I'll have my girl with me."

"We'd love to meet her, Jose. How about it?" I ask. "By the way, what's her name?"

"I'd love it and her name is Amelia Cruz."

"Great. Just bring Amelia with you and then stay for dinner. It will be good to have us all together again."

"Okay. I'm not sure of the hotel we'll be in, but I'll call you. Can we shoot for early afternoon? I want to catch the light."

"Sounds great. In fact come for lunch. Gail is a great cook. And forget the hotel. We have plenty of room for the two of you here."

"Are you sure?"

"Absolutely. That's the point of having a big house. You'll stay with us," I insist.

"Okay. We'll see you then. Take care, babe."

"You too Jose. Safe trip."

I need to have Christian home early Thursday. Not too early, but in time for dinner. I think I'll IM him. I open the laptop on Christian's desk I can see he's online as he always is.

* * *

Hope I am not disturbing you. Can you have Andrea make sure your schedule is clear Thursday evening? Jose and his new girlfriend and Elliott and Kate will be coming for dinner. I need you here.

A_

In the conference room trying to iron out details on a new contract with our workers at the ship yard here. I'd rather talk to you.

Will have Andrea leave Thursday open for you. Glad Jose has finally found a girl. Wish you were in my pocket. I could take you out and play with you.

C_

Thanks. Hope all goes well with negotiations. I wish you could play with me too. Found strange cell phone in your jacket pocket. Any ideas who it belongs to?

A_

Cell phone? My jacket? I have no idea. Have you looked at it to see?

C_

I have looked. No clues. Thought you might know who and how.

A_

Sorry. No. Will investigate when I get home.

C_

Spoke w/ Elliott this morning. All is well. Will let you go negotiate.

Love you,

A_

Glad to hear it. Can negotiate anytime. Would rather talk to you.

C_

Keep your mind on your negotiations. I'll be here when you get home.

A_

Wearing those shoes?

C_

If you like. Had I known they would affect you like this I would have bought some years ago.

A_

Had I known, I would have bought them for you.

C_

Go squeak out a paltry living. You have my new office to pay for.

A_

I think I have it covered. See you later this evening.

Love you.

C_

Looking forward to it.

Love you too, baby.

A_

* * *

"Kate? Hey it's Ana."

"Yes I know. What's up?"

"I'm not interrupting am I?'

"No. I have a few minutes."

"I wanted to let you know Jose and his girl will be here Thursday. I'm having a get together here Thursday night for them. Can you and Elliott make it?"

"I'll make sure we do, well, at least I'll be there. I'll do my best with Elliott. Depends on his mood."

"Great. I'll hogtie Christian and it will be the six of us. Dinner and drinks. It will be good to all get together and catch up. So much has happened over the past couple of years. And I'm really anxious to meet his girlfriend."

"What's her name?"

"Amelia Cruz." I tell her. "I won't keep you, I know you're busy. Speaking of busy, I forgot to tell you, I got a job."

"Ana! You're kidding. Where?"

"South Atlantic Publishing, working with Paul Sanders. "

"Wow. I'm proud of you Steele. But I thought SAP had their offices in Savannah."

"They do, but Paul is opening an office on the West coast in Sacramento."

"Sacramento? Isn't that a long commute?"

"Funny. I'll be working from home and traveling in to the office every quarter or so." I explain.

"Ana, that is so great. Will you be an editor?"

"Yep. I start first of the month. I have to go to Sacramento for a couple of days then."

"How's Christian taking it?"

"Surprisingly well. He is actually being supportive of this. I almost feel like a new person. Elliott is building me an office. He was out this morning to look at things."

"How is he?" Kate asks.

"Didn't you see him this morning, Kate?" I ask tentatively.

"No. He slept here, but in a guest room. He left before I got up."

"Oh. Kate I'm sorry. But I really think things will be okay. I have no idea what's going on, but Christian doesn't think it's permanent, whatever it is. I get the feeling Elliott just needs some space to work out whatever it is that's bothering him."

"Well, he needs to work it out with me. I don't know how much longer I can go on like this. It's getting very lonely in this marriage all by myself."

"I know. Hang in there. I'll keep my ears open and let you know if I hear anything."

"Okay. What time Thursday?"

"Oh, say about seven."

"Sounds good. See you then."

I quickly go to find Gail before she leaves with Grace to go to the Henderson's for a play date with their little girl, Shelby. She is up in Grace's room getting her dressed.

"Gail. Oh good I found you." I see her pulling a T-shirt over Grace's head. "Hey Baby girl. Are you going to go see Shelby?"

"Yeth, Mama. " She gets serious and shakes her head, "I won say the fuck wood there."

"That's good. But you don't have to tell me that you won't say it. Just don't say it." I give her a big hug. "I love you sweetie."

I roll my eyes and pray that she remembers. "Gail. I hope this isn't short notice, but we are having a small dinner Thursday evening. Just six. It won't be formal or business, just Elliott and Kate and an old friend, Jose Rodriguez and his girlfriend. And Jose and his friend will be here for lunch that day, so maybe something special for lunch."

"Okay. I can do that. Anything in particular you want?" she asks.

"Not really. You always come up with something spectacular." I tell her.

"Will there be cocktails before dinner?" she asks.

"Yes. Informal though."

"Okay. I 'll have some hors d'oeuvres prepared," she says holding out Grace's pants for her to step in and pulling them up. "Will you need Myra to stay and serve?"

"No. I want to keep it informal. We'll serve ourselves, and set the family dining room instead of the formal dining room. It's more intimate and I just want everyone to relax and have a good time. Thanks. You're the best."

"No problem. Well, Miss Grace, let's get that hair under control." Gail smiles over at Grace who is loving the attention.

"Oh, there's the phone."

"I'll get it Ana."

"No, you just take care of Grace. I'll run get it." I scurry down to our bedroom, where the nearest phone is and answer.

" Grey Residence."

"Ana?"

"Yes. This is Mrs. Grey."

"Ana this is Paul Sanders."

"Oh. Hi Paul. Sorry for the formality, but I never know who's on the other end. How are you?"

"I'm good. Look I won't keep you, but I have the dates for the Sacramento trip. Are you near a pen and paper?"

"Hold on." I grab a notepad from the nightstand drawer and a pen. "Shoot."

"Okay. I'll pick you up in Seattle around noon on Monday the first and we'll fly down. We'll be there Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday. Probably returning late Thursday or early Friday, depending on how much we get accomplished. Can you do that?"

"Absolutely. Oh, Paul. I hate to have to mention this, but Christian is adamant that I take a security person with me. Of course he will fly down separately. I'm really sorry. He just won't let me go without it. I'm almost embarrassed about it."

"Ana, don't be." He is so nice. " I certainly understand. Christian is a very wealthy man and that makes him and family members constant targets. We have security in the building of course, but I have no problem with you having a security person with you."

"Thanks. That's very understanding of you. "

"And he or she is more than welcome to fly with us. No need for them to have to make a separate trip. I'm sure your husband will feel better if they are on the flight with you."

"I really appreciate this, Paul. I'll try not to be so much trouble and I promise he will be discrete. You won't know he's there."

"That's fine. Look I'll have my assistant send you the travel info, where to meet the plane, arrival time, what hotel we're booked in etc. I have your email. Is it okay to use that to forward the information?" he asks.

"Yes. I'm looking forward to this. I can't tell you how excited I am to get back to work and I really appreciate this opportunity. Thank you so much."

"Hey, were looking forward to you coming on board with us. Well, I won't keep you and I have a meeting in a few, so I'll have that information sent. Good to talk to you, Ana."

"You too Paul and thanks again."

"Sure thing. Bye."

Wow, what a busy morning. When it rains it pours. I guess I need to call Virginia when I get that hotel information and let her know about Sacramento. I promised I would. I always sit on the fence on this. I hate to go behind Christian's back, but I just feel like if he knows the truth about everything, maybe it will help. And my kids deserve to know where they come from. What if there is some genetic problem that we need to know about. Maybe I'm just trying to rationalize doing this. What is it they say, it's hard to go a day without a rationalization? Of course I prefer NeNe Leakes' quote, '_A day goes a lot better when you know there's an orgasm at the end of it.'_ Yes, I much prefer that. Thank heavens I have a husband who lives by it. I need to go look through my closet for something to wear Thursday and make sure I have clothes for this trip.

* * *

"Hi, Sweetheart. How was your day?" Christian asks as he loosens his tie and slides it out from under his collar.

I meet him in the foyer and help remove his tie and unbutton his shirt top button. "It was productive. I talked to Jose and Kate and Paul today. Got a lot of plans made. How was yours? Did you get those workers under control?" I tease.

"Nothing to get under control. Just renegotiating their contract. Got it all worked out, " he gives me a quick kiss. "So you and Elliott buried the hatchet?"

"Sort of. I apologized and just told him to talk to Kate before it was too late. He apologized as well, so I think we're good."

"Good. I've encouraged him to talk to Kate, too. Maybe he will."

"Do you want a drink before dinner?" I ask him.

"Yep. Whatever you've got is fine." I head to the kitchen to fix his drink. " Oh, what were you telling me about a cell phone?" he asks after me.

"Here." I hand him a Hendricks and tonic since that's what I have. "Yep. I found it when I was checking the pockets in the jacket you wore Friday night."

"Did you look at it?' he asks.

"Yes. I admit that I did. There are some pictures and videos of the party. I left it on your dresser to take care of."

"Humm. Okay. I'll have a look. I have no idea how it got into my jacket pocket. I can take it in and have Barney find out who it belongs to and if any of the pictures were forwarded anywhere."

"Gosh. I sure hope not." I tell him.

"Me too. That's why I want you to take Sawyer with you, baby."

"Christian what do pictures have to do with me going to Sacramento?" I ask totally confused.

"Because, we are constant targets. You never know who is watching and what they have planned. It could be pictures on a cell phone for sale or blackmail, or kidnapping for ransom, I think you're familiar with that scenario. I can't take that chance with any of you. I can't let you go without someone going to make sure you are safe. I couldn't live if anything ever happened to you, baby. I wish you could understand that."

I put my arms around his waist and give him a hug, "I do understand Christian. I just don't like it."

"I don't either, but that's just what we're stuck with." He lifts my chin and gives me a kiss.

Christian puts his arm around my waist and we walk into the family room where the kids are playing and watching TV.

"Daddy!" Teddy gets up from watching TV and runs to hug his dad.

"Hey there, buddy. How was your day?" he sits down and Teddy snuggles in beside his dad.

"It was good. Only one more week." Teddy grins.

"One more week?" Christian looks confused.

" 'Till summer vacation. One more week dad."

"Oh, I forgot. That is exciting news." Christian takes a sip of his drink begins to unwind.

Grace comes running over to her dad and throws herself on his lap. "Hey sweetheart. Come up here." Christian says as he pulls her up in his lap. "How was your day, sweetie?"

"I went to Thelby's," she says so sweetly.

"You did? Did you have a good time?"

"Uh huh." She nods. "And I didn't say the fuck wood," she shakes her head.

Christian looks speechless and Teddy sucks in a gallon of air. "Mom. Grace said a bad word."

"I know Teddy, but she isn't going to any more, right Grace? Remember you don't need to tell us about it. Just don't say it." I remind her.

"But I wath a good gurl, mommy. I don't get con…sus… susenses," she explains.

"That's right, but you aren't going to say that anymore are you?" I ask.

"No." she shakes her head. "I not say the fuck wood again."

Christian is about to choke trying not to smile. "Ball's in your court Mr. Grey." I tell him.

Christian runs his hand over his mouth, I assume trying to wipe the smile off of his face. He puts his drink down and turns Grace to straddle his lap, by putting his hands on her upper arms. "Carla Grace Grey. I never want to hear that word come out of your mouth again. I don't want you to talk about it, explain it, describe it or deny using it. It is never to pass your lips again. Am I understood?" he looks directly into her little blue eyes. Stern gray to sweet blue as he chastises her. "Now, I don't ever want to have to talk to you about this again."

Grace looks up at him through her dark lashes, with her pink pout accenting her chubby little cheeks and pats Christian's face with her little hand. "Yeth, Daddy. I sorwy. I not do it again."

Christian grabs her and gives her a big hug, "That's daddy's good girl," he whispers to her.

I roll my eyes. "I don't believe what I'm seeing," I mutter.

Christian gives her a kiss. Teddy looks up at me and I know we are thinking the same thing. I give him a hug and a smile that lets him know I agree with him. He shakes his head and gets back on the floor to watch TV. Grace wiggles out of Christian's lap giving me the opportunity to snuggle in next to him. "That child owns you, Christian Grey."

"What?" he asks.

"I said that child owns you. Grace." I take a sip of my drink.

"No. She just thinks she does. I've been around women long enough to know that look, even if she is only three and my daughter."

"Wanna' bet?" I ask him.

He cocks his head and looks at me, "You almost sound jealous, Mrs. Grey."

"Oh, I'm not jealous, just wondering how in the world we're going to handle her. She already knows how to handle you."

"I think I can outsmart a three year old," he snorts.

"Three going on thirty." I shake my head. "Speaking of fathers and daughters, I'd like for Dad to come and stay for a little while. He had already planned to come and stay for a week after Sam was born and I'd like for him to still come and visit. I know he took the time off of work. I haven't seen him in ages and he hasn't seen the kids either."

"Sounds fine with me. Just let me know when and I'll send Charlie Tango for him. " Christian gives my shoulders a squeeze. "Are you okay? Sam was due next week you know. Maybe we should do something to try to take our minds off of it."

"I don't want to take my mind off of it," I tell him. "I want to remember it. It will just have to hurt."


	19. Chapter 19

_**Fifty Shades…Full Circle**_

_**Chapter 19**_

"Jose!" I throw my arms around his neck and give him a big hug.

Jose puts his arms around my waist and lifts me off the ground, "Ana, babe. Gosh it's good to see you."

"You haven't changed a bit. May be a better haircut and some designer duds, but still the same Jose." I almost get teary but I can't help it, it's been so long since I've seen him.

"Oh, Ana. This is Amelia." Jose grabs the hand of a beautiful young woman, early twenties I'd say. Long sun kissed light brown hair and huge brown eyes. She is petite, but has a really good figure. She extends her hand,"Mrs. Grey, it's so nice to meet you. I've heard so much about you from Jose."

"Amelia. Please come in and call me Ana. I am so happy to see you." I get Jose and Amelia in and seated in the family room. Gail has brought in iced tea and some snacks to start before lunch.

"So where are these kids that I'm supposed to take pictures of?" Jose asks.

"Oh, they are upstairs right now. They'll be down in a bit. " I look over at the large object wrapped in brown paper that Jose has brought with him . It is leaning against the chair he is sitting in. "What in the world is that Jose?"

"Oh. It's for you. I found it a while ago and kept meaning to send it to you, but never got around to it." Jose tears the paper off and reveals a photo framed just like the photos he took of me. I gasp as I look at it. "I found it in with some old negatives I was cleaning out. I don't know how I missed it. Since I was coming to see you, I thought I'd just bring it with me." It is a huge black and white of Christian and me at our wedding. It is a candid and I never saw Jose take it. It's a moment when we sneaked away from the crowd and I have his face cupped in my hands as he is tucking a wisp of hair behind my ear. Our eyes are locked and we look so happy, so much in love.

"Oh, Jose. It's just beautiful. "

"It's a gift . I wanted you to have it," he smiles at me.

"Oh, Jose I can't let you do that. At least let me pay for the framing," I tell him.

"Heavens no. I have someone who does my framing and I owe it to you for having it for so long. Please, let me give it to you."

I hug him as I stare at the picture. "This will make the perfect anniversary gift for Christian."

"It's coming up pretty soon, huh?" he asks.

"Yes, a couple of weeks. I just need to find a place to hide it until then. Oh, Jose, I can't thank you enough."

"I'm just sorry I overlooked that shot when I did your wedding photos," he shrugs.

"Please don't be. It's so nice getting it after all these years."

Amelia walks over to Jose and puts her arm around his waist, "That's really good, Baby."

"Jose squeezes her back and kisses her forehead, "Thanks, but then you like everything I do."

"That's because you do everything so well," she looks up at him like she adores him.

"Okay, you two. Am I going to have to get you a room?" I ask.

Finally my two munchkins come running in and join me on the sofa. "Jose, this is Teddy and Grace. Teddy and Grace this is Mr. Rodriguez and his friend Miss Cruz."

"No, please Jose and Amelia." Jose says to the kids."That's too much to remember. I can't believe how big they are."

Teddy smiles at them and Grace is bashful, smiling and trying to hide behind me. "You haven't seen Jose since you were little kids; in fact Grace was just a baby. Jose and Amelia are old friends of Mommy's and they are going to have lunch and dinner with us."

We eat lunch and Jose already has his camera out quietly snapping photos of the kids. After lunch we go out in the back yard. Amelia and I sit on the patio while Jose and the kids mess around in the yard.

"Ana. You have the most beautiful home and it's so big. It looked like a country club when we drove up." Amelia giggles a bit.

"Thank you. Yes it is awfully big. Bigger than I'd like, but we liked the property. Christian originally planned to tear it down and build something else, but I loved it and he let me have it remodeled instead," I tell her.

"Wow. I'm anxious to meet him. I've read so much about him. I couldn't believe it when Jose told me who you were married to." Amelia tells me as she sips her tea. "How in the world did you ever meet him?"

"Well, it was quite by accident. Christian was a large benefactor to the University Jose, Kate and I attended. Kate was a journalism major and was scheduled to interview him for the school paper. She came down with the flu and couldn't go, so rather than cancel the interview that it took her months to get, she asked me to go in her place. She had the questions all prepared, but I still made a mess out of it. It was so awful; I even tripped and fell when I walked into his office. I was so embarrassed." I am smiling recounting the story." Christian was so calm and collected. He put up with me for some reason and even asked me to consider his company for an internship. Of course his company had nothing that even came close to being compatible with my major. We saw each other several times and then he asked me out, sort of. Then it just happened really fast. We got married about a month after we met."

"A month! Goodness. How did you know you wanted to spend your life with him after just a month?" she asks me.

"I have no idea, I just did. We actually went through a lot in that month. It seemed more like a lifetime. But I knew I never wanted to be away from him." I smile over at her. "And it has lasted eight years. I have no doubt we'll be together forever. I just got very, very lucky, Amelia."

"I'd say. Handsome, rich, and in love. Doesn't get much better."

"No. It doesn't . He should be home in a while. I'm anxious for you to meet him." I tell her. "What do you do Amelia?"

"I just graduated, undergrad. I'm just before starting my Masters. I'm in marketing," she tells me.

"Any ideas what you want to do?" I ask her.

"Well, actually, I'd like to marry Jose and start a family. But please don't say anything to him," she asks.

"I won't. How does he feel about that?" I ask.

"I think he feels the same way. We've talked about it. I think it will happen at some point."

"Well, if it's what both of you want, I'm sure it will." I reassure her.

"Hey ,Ana." Jose motions for me to come over. "Come on and let's go down by the water to take a few."

"Well, come on Amelia. I'll introduce you to the boat house." We both get up and meet Jose in the yard as I grab the kids by the hands and walk down to the water's edge. We spend some time playing and looking for treasures, before I take a minute to show the boathouse to Amelia.

"Oh, my goodness. That boat house is beautiful, Ana." Amelia gushes. "It's larger and nicer than most homes."

"Christian and I use it as our getaway from time to time. We spent part of his birthday there last year." I have to smile to myself when I think about that. What a night.

"And that boat. It's a yacht! You could live on it," Amelia continues.

"Yes. Christian helped design and build it himself along with his shipbuilding company. He really likes boats. We spent a good portion of our honeymoon on a yacht."

"That must have been incredible."

"It was. Just my new husband and me on a boat in the Côte d'Azur for a month." Thinking back I have been pretty darned lucky. I never imagined that one day I'd be describing my life like this.

"Well, Ana. I think I have enough," Jose lets me know as we sit back down on the patio and watch the kids. "They sure have grown up Ana. They were so small last time I saw them."

"Well, you'll just have to come see them more often, Jose," grabbing his hand I give it a gentle squeeze.

"I'd like a couple myself. One day," he grins over.

"Jose, you aren't getting any younger. Can't wait forever," I tell him.

"I'm only a year or two older than Christian when you had yours."

"I know. Just don't put it off too long." I insist.

"There you are." I feel Christian sneak a kiss on my cheek from behind me.

"Oh, hi sweetheart. I'm glad you're home."

Jose stands up to shake Christian's hand. "Christian. Good to see you again. May I introduce Amelia Cruz, my girlfriend?"

Shaking Jose's hand, "Good to see you again, Jose. And good to meet you Amelia."

Amelia extends her hand and Christian shakes it, "It's good to meet you Mr. Grey. I've heard so much about you."

"All good I hope and please call me Christian," Christian smiles down at her.

"Christian," she corrects herself.

"Taking some good pictures?" Christian nods toward Jose's camera.

"Oh. Not really. You know photographers. Always got the camera ready," he acts surprised that Christian caught him with his camera.

"Well, I'd like first option before I see any hanging in a gallery again," Christian reminds him.

Jose laughs. "Yes, the last ones were quite profitable for me. Thank you."

"Can I get you a drink?" I ask as I put my arm around his waist and hug him.

"What is everyone drinking?"

"Iced tea," I tell him.

"Iced tea, it is then," he says as he loosens his tie. "Actually I'm going to go up and change. I'll be back down in a minute. I'll get Gail to fix it as I go back in."

"I'll walk you in. Jose, I'll be back in a minute. Can you make sure my kids are still alive when I get back?"

"I think I can manage."

"Oh, I thought you'd like to know, Barney got the information back on that cell phone," Christian tells me as we enter the house.

"Really? What? Tell me," I insist.

"It belongs to one Bridgett Starr. Various addresses. The pictures were not forwarded anywhere, thank fuck. I guess she didn't have time to do it before whoever got it and slipped it in my pocket."

"Good heavens. Wonder who swiped the phone? You don't suppose it was Elliott do you?" I suggest.

"I'll find out this evening. You just can't be too careful. I hope there aren't any others floating around."

"Me either. That could be disastrous….for everyone."

"That Amelia seems like nice girl. Cute too," he mentions.

"Yes. She seems very fond of Jose too. I hope it works out for both of them. Jose needs to settle down. I think he'd like to if he can find the right person," I tell him.

"He thought the right person was you, Mrs. Grey." Christian takes my arms and pulls me over giving me a good proper hello kiss.

"Mmm. That was nice." Looking up at him and giving him a sweet smile, " I wasn't the right person for him. I belong to you Mr. Grey."

"You bet you do. Just mine," he emphasizes.

"Just yours." Swatting his butt, " Go get changed. Kate and Elliott will be here in a while."

I join Jose and Amelia and my children on the patio, while Christian gets changed. He reemerges in his jeans and a pale blue crisp oxford cloth shirt with his black Italian leather loafers. He looks unusually hot this evening. Maybe it's just me. It's getting to be that time of the month and my hormones are in high gear. It's really strange to feel like my period is due and then, nothing. I can't say I miss everything that goes with it, but in a way I really do sort of miss it. Thank God I still have my ovaries and didn't have to go through menopause. That on top of everything else would have killed me I do believe. I like still getting the hots for my husband.

I notice Amelia can only tear her eyes away from him for a few moments at the time; always returning to stare at him in that way that all women seem to do . I like to think that it doesn't bother me anymore, but it still does in a way. At least I'm not quite so jealous anymore. If there's one thing I feel with Christian it is secure and safe. I trust him. What's a marriage without trust? It's nothing. I can't imagine what Kate is going through always being suspicious of what Elliott might be up to. I'm so thankful I don't have to go through that. The only real worry I ever had has been gone for several months now. I never have to worry about that again. I've been enough for him for eight years and I'm confident that I always will be. We're enough for each other.

We spend time just talking, watching the kids and getting to know Amelia. Jose really seems to be head over heels with this one, I hope it works out for both of them.

It's approximately seven and the doorbell rings right on schedule. Christian answers it and Kate along with Elliott walk in looking as together as usual, smiling and being sweet to each other.

I walk to the foyer and hug Elliott then Kate. "Kate, Jose looks great and I really like his girl," I whisper to her. "Even Christian seems to like her."

Christian gets their drink preference as we walk in to the family room. I keep thinking we need to use the living room more often, but it is just so formal. "My God, Jose. I just can't believe how long it's been. It is so damn good to see you." Kate gives him a huge hug and a squeeze. "And Ameila, it is so good to meet you," Kate gives her a polite hug.

Elliott has gone with Christian to help with the drinks and Gail brings in a try of table hors d'oeuvres to go with the drinks. After Christian returns with Elliott and the cocktails, we talk and catch up with things, then I excuse myself to check on dinner. Kate insists on accompanying me. "Kate you and Elliott look happy. "

"It's a front. I hate for our mood to be a downer for everyone else," she whispers.

"Have the two of you talked yet?" I ask her.

"Not really. He did tell me he had an appointment with that Dr. Flynn and asked me if I would go with him to the next one."

"Well, that's good, isn't it?" I ask her.

"I'm not sure. Bringing Flynn into it makes me feel like there are emotional issues. I can hold my own with a mistress, but I'm not sure how to fight this. What if he doesn't love me anymore?" Kate starts to get teary.

Grabbing her in a bear hug, " Kate, that's just not true. I know for a fact he loves you." I tuck my hand under her chin," Don't worry about that for a moment."

She wipes her tears and tries to freshen her face. "You know, I really feel like he does. He just never wants to make love to me anymore. That's just not Elliott. I mean how would you feel if Christian stopped wanting to have sex with you?"

"God, I can't even imagine that happening. Christian lives for sex. I think he has some sort of mutated gene that altered a normal sex drive to super human," I giggle. "Oh, Kate I didn't mean to make light of it. I can't imagine what you must be going through. But I think John Flynn will be helpful. He really has done wonders for Christian and me."

"Well, that's good to hear. Some hope on the horizon anyway," she manages a smile.

Dinner goes smoothly and we laugh and catch up. It's one of those rare evenings when the stars align and Christian is actually in a good mood and relaxed. He is getting along with Jose; I suspect it is due to Jose finally having a female in his life, ruling out the possibility of him being fixated on me, at least in Christian's mind. Kate and Elliott appear to be happy and relaxed.

"Well, I hate to leave good company, but Amelia and I have to get away early tomorrow," Jose says.

"Yes. I have really enjoyed this evening and finally getting to meet all of you. Jose has spoken of you so often, it's nice to put faces with the names," Amelia lets us know.

"Do you have everything you need in the guest suite?" I ask them.

"Oh, Ana. It's like a luxury hotel. I've seen guest bedrooms but never a guest suite. I just can't get over all of this in one house," Amelia gushes.

"Well I hope you will be comfortable. If you need anything please let me know," I tell her. Jose and Amelia excuse themselves and head off to bed. At least the guest suite has two bedrooms, two baths and a sitting room. I can use that to cover them sleeping in the same room to my children. Bit of a sticky wicket there.

Kate and Elliott stay for a few minutes longer. I move over and pull my feet up curling up next to Christian with his arm around me. "What did you think of Amelia?" I ask him.

"I think she's a cute girl. Seems to be fairly intelligent. He made a good second choice," he grins down at me.

"Second choice?" Kate asks.

"Oh, Christian has had it in his head that Jose wanted me, for years," I explain. "I've tried to convince him that it was a ridiculous notion."

"Well, it's not so ridiculous, Steele. Why else would a normal, healthy, young male hang out with two girls and not have sex when he could have been nailing pretty much every girl on campus?" Kate asks.

"I rest my case. Thank you, Kate," Christian nods in Kate's direction.

"Well both of you seem to have lost your minds. Jose and I were friends, that's all. There've only been three men in my life, Ray Steele, this man to my right and Theodore Grey," I tell them. "That's been more than enough for me."

"It better be," Christian nudges me.

"Christian I don't have time for anyone else, even if I wanted to, which I don't," I tease him.

"Well, Kate and I have to get home. We both have work in the morning," Elliott lets us know as he and Kate stand to leave.

"Oh, I hate for you to go. It's been so nice everyone being together," I whine.

"Me too, but I have kids to get up for school and then work," Kate reminds me. "You'll understand soon enough."

"Yea, but you do such a good job of it, babe," Elliott says to her.

I think Kate will cry as she looks over at him and her eyes get teary. "I didn't think you noticed," she tells him.

"I noticed," he nods his head at her. "I always notice." Elliott puts his arm around Kate as they walk toward the door.

"Tell Jose goodbye for me."

"I will Kate. You two take care and we'll get together soon," I yell after them as they head toward their car.

"Well. That's looks promising," I murmur to Christian.

"Oh, I think it will be okay," Christian squeezes my shoulder as he waves goodbye and closes the door.

I put my arms around him, "Promise me if you ever have issues, you'll talk to me. Don't let me think that you just don't love me anymore."

"I can't imagine not loving you, no matter what the issues, Mrs. Grey," Christian looks down at me with his arms around me.

"You know how lucky we are don't you?" I ask him.

""Yes I do. Let's go up to bed and get luckier," he smirks at me.

"My husband and his one track mind," I smile at him.

"Thank fuck yours is always on the same track," he grins as we head upstairs.


	20. Chapter 20

_**Fifty Shades…Full Circle**_

_**Chapter 20**_

**A/N: I have so many readers ask for this so here it is. The story is much longer on TWCS and we all know why.**

**Again, thank you all for the lovely reviews. You are all so kind and I do read and appreciate them all. **

Running a tub of water while Christian undresses, I watch as the bubbles form billowy white clouds and their sweet fragrance fills the moist air in the bathroom. I'm sitting on the side of the tub lost in thought as Christian walks over to me. He glides his hands through my hair as he pulls it up fastening it with a tie. "Mmmm. I like it when you mess with my hair. It feels good."

"I like messing with it. It's soft and it always smells so good," he tells me as sits down behind me and buries his nose in the chestnut strands and inhales. He slides his hands around to cup my breasts as I lean back against his chest. I place my hands over his as he massages and squeezes them. "I like it when you mess with my breasts, too."

"I like your tits. Best I've ever seen, and they're all mine," he whispers against my neck. I feel his hand move down and slide beneath my jeans and panties. Gasping as his fingers glide between my thighs. I thrust my hips forward to meet him as his other hand unbuttons my jeans and pulls the zipper down. I reach down and grasp the waistband with my fingers and pull my jeans and panties over my hips and down my thighs, working them to the floor and off with my legs and feet.

My legs fall open for him as I moan and arch my back against him. "That's my girl," he murmurs to me. I move my hips into his erection that is growing against me. "Fuck Christian. My hormones are raging. I've been wanting you all day," I growl at him.

"Thank the lord for hormones." He wraps his legs over mine as he begins to massage and stroke. I can feel the muscles in my tummy quiver and my breathing catch with each pass of his hand against me.

"I'm going to make you come and then fuck the living daylights out of you," he whispers in my ear as he nips my earlobe.

"Promises, " I gasp as my tummy muscles jump," promises, Mr. Grey."

"Oh, I'm a man of my word, Mrs. Grey. Hold on to your hat, baby."

I can feel the bubbles with my foot and realize the water is still on. Still in the process of working toward my climax, I blindly swat at the air trying to find the faucet to turn the water off. "What are you doing?" Christian softly asks me.

"Water. Turn it off," I gasp at him. Christian takes his bare foot and kicks the faucet stopping the flow of the warm water.

"Better," I gasp as I thrust my pelvis into his hand. "Oh, my god."

"You're so beautiful," he whispers as he massages my breasts, " your tits are so soft and firm."

All I can sense right now is Christian and what he is doing to me. I can feel myself getting more aroused by the moment. His touch is relentless yet soft and gentle; pushing me higher, closer and closer to my release with each stroke. "God, Christian. Don't stop. Please don't stop."

"Is that good? I want to make you feel good. But you can't come yet. I'm not ready." I can feel his warm breath against my cheek as he slows his caress and I fall away from the edge.

"No," I whine. As the feeling begins to leave and I'm back in my chasm of need.

"Not, _no_. Just not _yet_, baby," he murmurs to me, continuing to gently stroke keeping me needy and wanting. "Just relax and let me make you feel it for a bit. Then you can come." He gently kisses my cheek and I can feel his smile against my skin.

"Oh Christian. You can be so mean, " I try to gasp.

"I know. But you like it, don't you?"

"No. I want to come," I almost cry as I force myself against his hand.

"You want to come…what?" he asks.

"Please. I want to come please." I beg him. "Please let me."

He softly kisses my cheek, "Okay. That's better. You can come this time, baby." The pulling in my belly begins again as he concentrates his caress on the needy area between my thighs. I can feel myself relax and my toes wiggle just before I tense and my back arches against him.

"That's my good girl. Come for me," he whispers. My climax now racing through me takes me over consuming me. "God I love you," I faintly hear Christian murmur as he teases every last spasm out of me before I finally relax against him, totally spent.

Christian releases his firm hold on me and supports me as he scoops me in his arms. He lowers me to the floor and strips me of my remaining clothing. Then easing me back to lie on the floor he hovers over me on all fours. "I want you," I whisper as I feel him prodding my entrance. I can feel myself brace as Christian gently begins to slide past my threshold. As soon as he enters he stops then swiftly buries himself in me to the hilt. I hear myself gasp, "Baby wait, give me a second," I whisper to him.

"Let me know when it's okay," he whispers back. "Just relax."

"It's okay." I murmur as I feel my arousal begin to ease his way.

Christian slowly begins to glide out and back again. "Still okay?" he asks me.

"Yes. Yes." I look up into his eyes and run my fingers through his hair as I feel him begin to move with more determination. I lift my head to take his mouth with mine as I pull him to me. His mouth consumes mine as his tongue glides over my lips and searches my mouth. The air leaves my lungs in bursts every time he forces his way in. I can feel him move and put his hands behind my knees forcing my legs up to my chest giving him complete access to me. Looking into his eyes I can see them glaze over with that mask of pleasure letting me know that his release is not far away.

"Fuck, baby. That's right," he growls as he races to his release. My hips rise to meet him and I can feel myself starting to build again.

"God, Christian," I whimper to him.

"I know baby. Come for me again. I want to watch you," he growls again as he pushes harder and faster. I can feel the pulling begin again as his erection continues to stroke that spot deep within me. "I can feel you. You're almost there. Open your eyes Anastasia, " he orders me. I comply as I feel myself fall over the edge and into the abyss. "That's my girl. I can feel you against me." He continues to push me as my orgasm begins to wane. He braces on his elbows and closes his eyes as he begins his final drive toward home. He is racing fast and his breathing is course. His face begins to flush as his eyelids get heavy. I feel one last deep push as he tenses and stills. "FUCK," I hear him growl. The veins in his neck bulge and his breathing stops as he begins to tremble out his release, spilling into me. I can feel the sweat that glazes us as his body glides over mine. His heavy moist breath clings to my neck as he begins to regain his senses. Our breathing syncs as we both begin to come back to earth lost in each other's arms and thoroughly sated.

"Shit that was good. Are you okay?" he asks me.

"Yes. I'm more than okay," I tell him as I look into his eyes and run my hand through hair, now soaked with perspiration.

"God what you can do to me Anastasia." He whispers as he falls on to me and buries his face in my neck. "You've bewitched me from the moment I met you. I can't ever get enough of you. "

I nuzzle my cheek against his, "Just as long as you always love me, Christian. That's all I want."

"I could never not love you. I don't even remember what it was like to not be in love with you."

"Me too." I whisper. "Our water is getting cold."

Christian sinks into the still warm water and helps me in as I turn to sit in front of him. I crawl between his thighs and lean back against his chest. "I'm exhausted," I sigh as I fall against him and he wraps me in his arms.

"You have the most beautiful skin, Anastasia," he says as he glides his hands over my wet naked body. "It's like satin. Alabaster satin. I'm glad you don't spend time in the sun. No tan lines. Just one continuous creamy color and so soft."

"I'm glad you like it. I want you to like it." I reach behind me and feel he is his reenergized and I take him in my hand. Christian reaches around and pulls his fingers up between my thighs, "So wet again already," he growls.

"Come here," he takes me and props me on my knees then leans me forward across the edge of the tub. I gasp when I feel his fingers stroke over the wetness and spread it to my behind making me relax and moan as his thumbs massage the slick arousal over my rosette. I prop up on my elbows as he relaxes me continuing to massage and drag the lubricant over my tight opening.

I gasp a little as his thumb pops through the taut threshold. "Okay baby?" he whispers.

"Yes," I nod. I begin to relax even more as I feel his thumb move in and out. My arousal is building in me again. His thumb leaves me and it is replaced by the sensation of him probing against me. Christian pulls his hand over me again and spreads the moisture over himself then he gently pushes against me. I can feel the pleasant pressure until once again I feel the sensation as he enters.

"Oh, God," I gasp and grip the edge of the tub.

"Are you okay?" Christian stills as he sweetly kisses my back.

"Yes. Just go slow. It's been a while," I ask.

I feel the tenderness of Christian's hands as they glide over the skin on my back and come to rest on my hips. Then the gentle movement of his hips as they roll forward inch by inch forcing him deeper in. He slowly withdraws and then pushes in a little farther with each roll forward. I can feel myself relax as the wonderful sensation begins. The sensation of him filling me and the tender nerve endings coming to life are incredible. As I relax he moves faster and deeper and he pulls me back to meet his every move forward. One of his hands gently glides around and finds the sensitive area at the apex of my thighs and he begins to circle and stroke as his drive continues.

"Oh. My. God." I gasp. Christian buries his face on my back and gently kisses my skin moving his warm lips across my shoulders. I can feel myself beginning to tighten as he continues to caress me over and over.

"God, Anastasia, you feel so good," he growls. "I can't go much longer."

"I know. I'm almost….almost. Oh shit," I growl back as I peak and tumble over the precipice. I feel the incredible release wash over me and my body begins to shudder beneath him. He continues to caress me as the release takes me and then begins to subside. I can feel myself relax as he begins the race to his own climax. He places both hands on my hips pulling me to meet him with each push. I can feel him as he stills and shudders," Fuck!" he growls and then collapses on to my back. His warm breath washes over my skin as his chest heaves and his heart races. Finally as he relaxes he moves out of me as he pulls me up to him. Still on my knees I rest my head on his chest trying to regain my strength. Christian sits back in the tub and pulls me to him sitting between his legs. He wraps his arms around me as he engulfs me tightly.

"We haven't done that in ages," I remind him still feeling spent.

He nuzzles my hair and kisses my cheek, "I know. Are you okay?"

"Mmm. I'm fine. Are you okay?" I groan.

"I'm fucking marvelous," he snorts.

Christian pours the sweet smelling bath wash on to the bath sponge and begins to rub it over my back washing my neck and arms then he moves it around and over my breasts and down my tummy. I'm limp like a ragdoll and moan with pleasure at the tender care he is giving me.

"Stay here," he tells me as he moves around to face me. I lean against the back of the tub. "Here, give me a leg," he says as he picks up my foot and slides the sponge up and down my leg and then repeats it with the other leg. He kisses and sucks my toes after he finishes. "That tickles." I jerk my foot back and giggle.

He holds my foot firm as he continues to run his warm tongue over my toes. "Oh does it?" he teases.

"Yes. Stop." I insist as he gives me a wicked grin.

"Want me to wash your hair?" he asks.

"Yes, please sir." I answer him.

Christian moves behind me again and pulls up the sprayer. He bends my head back and lets the warm water rush through my hair. Then he gently massages the shampoo through my chestnut strands as he rubs my scalp. "Mmm. I like that."

"Feels good?" he asks.

"Oh, yes. I may go to sleep while you do that."

"Oh, no you don't. I'm just getting you clean, " he whispers.

"I like it when you take care of me, Mr. Grey."

"Well I like taking care of you, Mrs. Grey. In fact I've made it my mission in life to take care of you."

"I like that mission."

Christian tilts my head back and rinses the shampoo out. "There you go Mrs. Grey. All clean."

"Now, I'll do you." I tell him as I begin the task of lathering up the sponge and gliding it over him. I straddle his lap and stroke his chest and shoulders with the soapy implement, stopping to quickly kiss his nose. He wrinkles his nose and smiles at me as I circle his neck with my arms washing his neck and shoulders. I bend down and gently brush my lips over his then rub his nose with mine. He leans up and seals his mouth over mine exploring every part of it with his. I deepen his kiss and let my tongue dance with his.

Pulling away I move behind him and wet his hair then massage the shampoo into his scalp. I hear his soft moans as he relaxes against me. Finally I tilt his head back and rinse the lather from his hair. "I think we're clean." I tell him as I kiss his back. I love his back, his skin is so soft and warm marred only by the small round scars. Though they have grown faint over time, they are still visible. I rub my cheek against his skin as I circle my arms around his chest. "Ready for bed?" I ask.

"Ready for bed with you," he says as he stands up. "Here," he extends his hand out to help me up. We wrap each other in fluffy white towels and dry each other off. I finger dry my hair as he buffs his head dry. He grabs the hair dryer out of my hand. "Hey!" I yell at him. "I was using that." He just grins at me and I can't be mad. After a couple of seconds of running it over his head he hands it back, "Here you go," as he kisses my nose. When I finish I drop my towel and walk out into our bedroom . Christian is sitting on the side of the bed. He hasn't put his pajama bottoms on yet. I walk over to him and stand between his legs and kiss the top of his head. He circles my waist with his arms and kisses my tummy then gently kisses each nipple.

I sink down to my knees and cup his face in my hands bringing it forward until our lips meet. After a deep wet kiss, I pull away and kiss his neck then begin to trail kisses down his chest and then his ripped abs. I let my wavy chestnut mane drape across his lap as I take my kisses down. He is erect and firm again as I brush my lips against him. I pull him to me and stroke him against my cheek and across my face. I can hear his gasp as I open my mouth and caress him with my warm breath. Then I begin to gently kiss him from tip to base and back up again. I take him in my hands and gently begin to move them up and down as I softly kiss and lick the tip taking the drop of liquid that has formed there.

"God, Anastasia." I hear him whisper as he fists his hands in my hair. I take him in my mouth and move down on him as far as I can go, then stroke my tongue against him as I pull up. Again I descend with him in my mouth and suck hard as I pull him out again.

"Jesus. Baby. That's so fucking good," he gasps. I use my tongue to flick the underside as I circle him with my mouth, then rim him with my tongue before taking him fully in my mouth again. I can feel Christian take my head in his hand as he begins to push into me, moving my head to meet him. I begin to move up and down on him faster, sucking harder as I use my hands to move up and down in sync with my mouth. He begins to tremble as his breathing becomes ragged. "That's good, baby. Yes, just like that." He is gasping as he continues to push, "Don't stop. That's it. Baby, I'm gonna' come." I continue to suck letting him know that it's okay. He pulls my head down to him with both hands and stills as I feel the warm thick liquid hit my throat and slide down. I can feel him jerk as he continues to fill my mouth and I swallow hard to keep from choking. He finally relaxes and runs his hands through my hair pulling it away from my face. He lifts me up to face him and pulls my head to him kissing me deep and long, pushing my moist hair off of my face.

He takes my hands and helps me to my feet and the onto our bed. "Want something to drink?" he asks.

"Yes." I nod, still out of breath. Christian gets up and walks over to the mini fridge and gets two bottles of water and returns to bed with them. He opens one and gives it to me then opens the other and takes a drink. "Gosh, that's good and cold. Thanks." I tell him.

Christian gets back on the bed and leans against the headboard as I snuggle up against him. "How do you feel?" I ask him.

"Well, since I seem to have fucked every orifice in your body, I'd say I feel pretty damn good right now," he tells me with a smile.

"I guess you do."

"How do you feel?" he asks me.

"Well since you seem to have fucked every orifice in my body, I'd say I feel pretty damn good right now as well," I smile up at him. He looks down at me; taking another long drink of water as he smiles and gives me a wink and strokes my back with his fingers. He takes my water and his and puts them on the night stand and moves down to face me. We lie awake talking like lovers do after the ecstasy. He traces my collar bones with his fingers and then my lips, "Anastasia?"

"Yes?" I answer still drunk on the liquor of passion that courses through my veins.

"Why?" he asks. "I've never understood why."

"Why what?" I turn to face him confused about what he is asking.

"Why do you let me dominate you? You don't like being hurt; I've learned that over the years. I know why I need to dominate, but you are so independent, so equal with me in every other aspect of our lives. Why do you feel submissive in the bedroom with me?"

I lie there a moment trying to understand it myself before trying to explain it to him. "Well, I think it is because I love you so much. I look at you and I have a need to make you happy, to show my love for you, to worship you in a way. I need to trust you and by being submissive to you, I have to trust you. I put myself in your hands because I know you love me and will take care of me. I take joy in what you give me. " I stroke his face as I stare into his grey eyes that are reflecting the love that I feel for him. " I have given myself to you for you to protect and care for. I want you to do what's best for me and that includes the bedroom."

"I don't really like or need pain, but I do enjoy the occasional spanking and I trust you because I know that you won't hurt me. I want you to give me what I need sexually. I want you to tell me when to come and expect you to make sure that happens because you know that's what I need and want. I expect you to tell me what to do to you so that I can give you pleasure because it's what you need. It makes me happy to give you what you need. It all comes down to just how much I love, desire and trust you, Christian. I love that you protect and worship me. I love that you want me safe and cared for. I love that you want to give me everything and support me. I love that I am the center of your life and your reason for living just as you are mine. Because of that I belong to you. Body, mind and soul I belong to you Christian Grey. Do with me what you want because, in every way, I am totally yours," I whisper against his soft lips.

"My God, you have no idea how absolutely incredible that is," his voice is husky with love and desire. "I want nothing more than to care for you, protect you and give you all the pleasure I'm capable of giving you. And I love that you allow me to do it. I love the look in your eyes when you surrender to me as you are coming. I can't believe that your body is mine, only mine and you trust me so completely with it. I love that you allow me to give and control your pleasure. I want to be everything to you because you saved me Anastasia and I'll spend the rest of my life thanking you."

I feel the warmth as his lips press against mine as his body engulfs me and he surrenders to me, not just physically again, but totally. He is mine.


	21. Chapter 21

_**Fifty Shades…Full Circle**_

_**Chapter 21**_

**A/N: Thank you for all of the really nice comments. I read them all and appreciate them more than you know. I don't know if this is good or bad, but this book is taking longer than I expected. It is likely to be a long book to get everything in. Hang in there.**

* * *

I wake feeling Christian lightly stroking his fingers down my back and over my bum. I had fallen asleep on my tummy and he is lying beside me. "What are you doing?" I whisper.

"Just admiring what's mine. You are so fucking beautiful. What did I ever do to deserve you?" He leans over and lays his head on my back, still rubbing my butt.

" You are just over the top tonight." I tell him.

"Mmm. I can't get enough of you. I want to crawl inside you and stay there."

"You just enjoy fucking me senseless with Jose down the hall," I tease him.

"That too." I can feel his grin against my skin. "Too bad he had to settle for second."

"Christian, will you get off of that, please?" I chastise him. "Jose seems very happy with Amelia and she seems crazy about him. I think they make a good couple."

He gently kisses my butt, "Your right. The boy has done well for himself." I sense his tongue gently gliding over my skin as he wraps his arm around me and strokes my ass with his nose.

"Christian haven't we done enough? Stop that." I flex my butt muscles.

"It's never enough. I think I'll just make out with your ass for a while," he murmurs against my skin.

"Good Lord. Why did I marry such a letch?" I hiss.

"Because you love me and can't live without me, " he grins up at me.

"Yes. I guess that was it." I turnover and force him back on his side of the bed. I crawl over on top of him and get comfortable as he strokes my back. "We need to go to sleep. You have to go to work in the morning and I need to get Jose and Amelia fed and on their way."

"I'd rather talk to you than sleep."

"Christian, what do you want to do for your birthday? It's in a couple of weeks you know." I ask him.

"Oh, I don't care. Just as long as you and the kids are there."

"You know Teddy isn't going to pass up anything that involves cake and ice cream."

My body shakes as Christian chuckles. "I do love that kid. How did we end up with him?"

"You remember how. You kept making deposits until we ended up with a little savings account," I smile at him.

"Well, I think someone forgot to go to the doctor." Christian wraps me in his arms and laughs, "God we fucked a lot. I don't think we passed up a flat surface."

"Or a car, or an elevator, or bathtub…. We still don't pass up much," I remind him.

"How did I ever find a woman who can keep up with me?" he asks.

"Maybe I found a man who can keep up with me?" I smirk at him.

"Yep. Maybe you did."

"Oh, did you ask Elliott about the cell phone?" I look up and ask.

"I did. He has no idea. I told him about it and what was on it."

"What did he say?" I ask.

"Oh, usual Elliott. He was surprised. He apologized for it, but he didn't know how it got there. Fuck he was probably so drunk he did it and forgot."

"That does sound like him. By the way, Kate said Elliott went to see Flynn and that she is going with him next visit."

"That's good. They need to do that," he says still stroking my back.

"Are you going to tell me what is going on?" I ask again.

"Baby, Elliott discussed it with me. He didn't tell me not to tell you, but I would hate for Elliott to tell Kate if the situation were reversed. "

"When did you discuss it?" I ask him.

"That night you were in the hospital and you sent me away so Kate could stay with you. Elliott and I drank and talked most of the night. I don't think we've ever don't that. It felt good." He kisses my head and strokes my hair.

"I'm glad. Christian you need someone to talk to other than me. You need an outlet."

"You're all I ever need, Anastasia."

"Christian you know what I mean. It's good for you to have someone other than me to confide in. Everyone needs a friend," I try to explain.

"I guess you're right. Elliott can be my brother and my friend."

I look up at him and marvel that it has taken him thirty six years to figure this out. "Well halleluiah. I've finally gotten something through that thick skull of yours."

"Fuck you," he smirks. "It's not that. I just have trust issues and I don't confide in just anyone."

"No shit. You? Trust issues? I would have never guessed." I smirk back.

"Woman you are asking for an ass whipping. You better control that smart mouth of yours, before I'm forced to put a stop to it."

"Promises, promises. You can't tempt me with that twitchy palm of yours, Mr. Grey."

"I'll bet I can. Watch me." Christian throws me over on my tummy and puts his leg over my legs and his hand on my back as I feel him begin to caress my butt cheeks.

I squeal at him as I feel his palm come down on my butt. "Oww. Please. Give me another one," I giggle.

"You're asking for another one?" he asks as he strokes his soft warm hand over my skin.

"Yes sir, please." I feel his hand come down on me again, then the soft caress of his lips where he has smacked me. He kisses and licks my skin just before I feel the third sting against my butt.

"Ouch, that stings," I whine.

"It's supposed to. You're getting pink." He says as he caresses my butt, before delivering the fourth blow; this one harder than the rest.

"Shit that hurt?" I scold him.

"Yes I know," he whispers to me. "Damn you're wet again," he says incredulously.

"I know. I can't help it. Somewhere along the way I learned to really like spankings. I have no idea how it happened."

"Well I'd like to go again, but I've gone three times tonight already. I'm not sure if I can do a fourth….. at least not yet. Give a man a break. But I'll be glad to help you out," he offers.

"No actually, I'm tired. It's been a long day, but thanks for the offer," I smile over at him. "I'll take a rain check. You still haven't told me what you want to do for your birthday. You know your mother will want you over for dinner to celebrate."

"I know. Maybe we can go over and eat then come back here and celebrate. Just the four of us," he suggests.

"If that's what you want, that's what we'll do," I tell him.

"Would you consider wearing the gift you gave me last year?" he asks with a sly look on his face.

"Uhh. That would be a no. That was last year's gift. I don't even know where the thing is."

"I do. I have it, " he tells me. "Maybe you can wear it for our anniversary," he suggests.

"Maybe. We'll see. Just not in public; at least not at your parent's house again. Your poor mother thought I had a bad case of the cramps. Can't use that excuse anymore."

"I certainly enjoyed it," he gives me a wicked grin.

"Well I'm glad. It was meant for you to enjoy. We'll dust it off again one day."

Christian yawns and stretches. "I'm getting tired."

"Me too. Get up and let's get into bed." I get up and turn down the bed, then slip my gown over my head. Christian and I get in and snuggle under the covers. I move over and kiss him. "Good night, Mr. Grey."

"Good night Mrs. Grey." I lay my head on his chest and he kisses my head and puts his arm around me. Life is good with Christian Grey.

* * *

"Fuck!" I hear Christian growl as he swats at the alarm.

"It's not time to get up yet is it?" I ask.

"I'm afraid so," he rolls over and kisses my shoulders.

"We stayed up too late last night." I growl clearing my throat. "I need to get up and get Jose and Amelia off this morning." I roll over and stare at his beautiful face. His eyes are barely open and his hair is falling over his forehead. I run my hand through his hair brushing it off his face. "You look happy this morning," I tell him.

"I am. I spent the evening making love to my wife last night," he whispers as he nuzzles my neck.

"That's a coincidence, because I spent the evening making love to my husband last night." I cock my head to look at him, "Wait a minute. You look very familiar. I think you are my husband."

Christian smiles and shakes his head then rubs my nose with his. "Gotta' get up." He sits up and rubs his head and yawns. "I may have to go to Pittsburg sometime soon. I'll try to avoid it, but I may have to end up going. There is a supplier there that I need to check into. Are you interested in going?" he asks me.

"Why? So I can sit around the hotel and wait until you come back and fuck me?" I smirk.

He nods, "Yeah, something like that," he says in all seriousness.

"I'll think about it. I have so much to get done before I start back to work. I have the office to get started on, I want Ray to come visit, I have my husband's birthday to plan. Teddy is getting out of school next week." I shrug. "I'll just have to see if I can fit you in."

"Well, it's not definite yet. I'll let you know." He stands up and heads to the bathroom to shower. I watch the muscles flex in his ass as he walks away. Christian grins and looks over his shoulder, "Stare at it baby. You won't see it again until tonight."

"I'd better see it tonight." I chide him as I toss a pillow at him.

I run in and wash up, brushing my teeth and pulling my hair up. Then I slip into my clothes and head downstairs.

"Good morning Gail," I smile over at Mrs. Taylor who has the coffee made and hands me my tea.

"Good morning, Ana. Did you enjoy your evening?" she asks.

"Oh, yes. It was so good to see everybody again. I felt twenty two again."

"Yes. You're so ancient now, Ana." Gail smirks. "Mr. Grey was in an unusually good mood last night."

"Yes he was. It was a very pleasant evening." I smile at her as I take a sip of my hot tea. "Oh , Gail. They are going to start to work on the office bright and early Monday morning. Just thought I'd give you a heads up. There will be workmen in and out for a while. Probably a lot of dust everywhere, too so tell Myra not to worry about it."

"Where are they going to put it?" Gail asks.

"They are going to take part of Christian's office and part of the library to make it , so I guess it will between the two," I tell her.

"How was Mr. Grey with you taking part of his office?" she asks me.

"I have no idea. I asked him I don't know how many times to help me decide where to put it and he always just said he didn't care. Any where I wanted it was fine. This was the only place that worked out. I think he's still in denial about me going back to work," I give a giggle.

Gail raises her eyebrows and gives me a strange smile.

"Gail, Jose and Amelia will probably be down in a few minutes and Christian is getting dressed. I guess we need to get breakfast on the way. Just put it in the breakfast room."

"Okay. Anything special?" she asks.

"Just whatever you have planned is fine."

"Eggs, bacon, buttered toast, French toast, fresh fruit, juice, coffee and tea?" she says.

"Sounds good to me."

"I'll do any special orders if anyone wants anything different."

I walk out of the kitchen to see Jose and Amelia coming downstairs.

"Good morning. Did you two sleep well?" I ask.

"Perfectly." Amelia says.

"Great. There is coffee in the kitchen just ask Gail and I'll be back down in a few. I have to get Teddy up for school. Christian is getting dressed and should be down in a few minutes."

I get Teddy roused and on his way to getting dressed. Then stop by to check on Christian who is almost ready. He grabs his suit jacket and gives me a quick kiss as he heads downstairs with me.

"Good morning everyone. You slept well I trust?" Christian asks Jose and Amelia.

"Yes. Thank you, Christian," Jose smiles over at us.

"This place is just so amazing," Amelia chimes in. "It's just beautiful."

"Well, that's all Ana's doing. I gave her free reign with the house. It's all hers," he says a he looks around and admires my handiwork.

"Well, me and my decorator, Liz. Actually it's more her," I confess. "I really like the way we have the formal part of our home for business and parties, then we have our family area. I wanted the kids to grow up with a small home feel. We spend most of our time around the kitchen and the family room." About that time Teddy comes bounding down the stairs. "Good morning sweetie."

"Hey Mom. Hey Dad." Christian gives him a big hug.

"Good morning, sport. Only a week left to go," Christian reminds him.

"Breakfast is ready," Gail announces and we head to the breakfast room.

Everyone serves their plates from the buffet. I get Teddy served and settled in. "We never eat in here Mom."

"I know. I just thought it would be nice to have breakfast in the breakfast room for a change."

Teddy shrugs and gives me a smirk as he shovels in the French toast and warm syrup.

"Where's Grace?" Amelia asks.

"My daughter requires her beauty sleep," Christian says sarcastically.

"Yes. She's a bear if she doesn't get enough sleep , so I don't get her up until I get the men off in the mornings," I tell her. "You wouldn't like being around her this time of the morning."

We finish breakfast and I get Teddy and Christian in the SUV with Taylor and off down the driveway.

"Well, Ana it's been great. Let's not wait so long next time," Jose gives me a big hug.

"No we won't. I can't tell you how much I've enjoyed getting to see you and to meet Amelia."

"Me too. You look so happy. I'm glad things worked out for you, babe," he tells me. "Even Christian seems different, somehow; more relaxed, more personable, more …human, " he smirks.

"Yes. I think time and having kids did that to him. They really have brought out the softer side of Christian Grey."

"I think you had a lot to do with that," he smiles at me.

"Well what ever did it, I'm very, very happy. "

"Okay. Look I'll get these pictures finished and framed and then have them sent to you. Should take about a week.

"Jose that's great. You don't know how much I appreciate it. And please tell your dad hello for me. I miss getting too see him." I lean in and whisper, "I like Amelia. I think your dad will like her too."

"I hope so. I like this one,"' he gives me a big smile.

I give Amelia a big hug, "It was so nice to meet you Amelia. I'm sure I'll be seeing you again. Thank you for coming with Jose."

"Ana. It was so nice meeting you. Jose has talked about you and Kate so often. Thank you for having us and thank Christian as well."

I finally get them out the door. Gail has gone up to get Grace up. I prefer to do it. I like my face to be the one my kids wake up to, but it is a help while I get our company off.

The house finally under control, I sit down to make my calls. First off my dad.

"Hey Daddy. Good morning."

"Ana, baby. To what do I owe the honor of this early morning call? Is everything okay?" he asks.

"Just fine. Jose was here for a visit and spent the night. I just got him off. He is going down to visit Mr. Rodriguez. He has a new girl and I think he wants his dad to meet her."

"I'll have to call Jose and get the scoop after they leave, " he laughs. "How are the kids? And Christian?" he asks.

"Well, I'd like for you to come see for yourself," I tell him. "Look, Dad, I know you took time to come down after Sam was born. I still want you to come. Please?" I ask him.

"Well, I was just gonna' mess around the house, maybe do some painting, but I can come for a visit." He tells me. "Are you okay, sweetie?"

"Yes. I'm fine. I just haven't seen you in a while and I'd like to spend some time with you. And the kids ask about you. They'd like to see you too."

"Sure, okay. Maybe for a few days."

"Great. Christian will send the helicopter for you," I tell him.

"Oh that isn't necessary. I can drive. It's not that far. Bedsides, I was gonna' ask if I can bring Fred. "

"Who's Fred?" I ask him.

"Well, I was getting kind of lonely. I went down to the pound and got me a dog. His name's Fred."

"Oh. Well."

"He's a little young to leave him. Is it okay if I bring him with me?" he asks. "He's a lab mix, but he's not too big yet."

"Dad. It's no trouble," I insist. "Bring him with you. Teddy will love him."

"That's why I'd prefer to drive. And that way I'll have my car."

"How's the car doing"" I ask him.

"Great. That son-in-law of mine really knows how to give a gift," he laughs.

"Yes. He's a little like Elvis in that way. He does like to make sure everyone has a safe, reliable car. I'm glad you're enjoying it."

"Who wouldn't enjoy it? It's like driving while sitting in my Lazy Boy," he chuckles. "It does everything but bring me a beer and keep me warm at night. Well, when do you want me?"

"How about next weekend?"

"I can do that. Anything I can bring you?"

"Just yourself. Be careful, Daddy."

"I will, baby."

"I love you, daddy."

"Me too sweetie. See you next weekend."

Now for the other side of the family.

"Hello. This is Anastasia Grey. Mrs. Douglas, please."

"One moment please, Mrs. Grey."

"Mrs. Grey, this is Virginia Douglas. It's nice to hear from you."

"Thank you. I have the dates for my trip to Sacramento. I will be arriving the afternoon of the first. It's on a Monday." I tell her. "I'll be there until Thursday. I'll be staying at the Hyatt Regency downtown. I'll be there on business, but perhaps we can meet over dinner."

"That sounds fine. I'll make a reservation to be there on the first. You have my number. Just call me and we can make arrangements for dinner," she tells me. "Mrs. Grey, you have no idea what this means to me. I'm an old woman with no family. My only child is dead and Christian is all that is left. I don't want to intrude on his life. Really I just want some sort of closure for this before I die. I want to see what I have left of my precious Ella."

"I understand, Mrs. Douglas. But please understand what a risk I am taking in doing this. My husband trusts me and I don't like going behind his back. My only reason for doing this is to perhaps give him closure as well. All he knows of his mother came from a private detective. Just cold hard facts. Because of that he has suffered quite bit. I'm hoping that perhaps he can find out about her as a person. Know where he came from; who she was."

"I understand. I'd like to provide that for him." I can hear her voice break. "Well until the first then, Mrs. Grey."

"Yes, Virginia. I'll call you when I arrive."

"Good bye."

Whoa. It's all I can do to not cry. I can't imagine what it must be like for her. I don't know what I'd do in her position; to lose your only child. To be at the end of your life and be all alone. That is if all this is true. I hope I'm not being taken for a ride. I intend to meet her at the hotel. I'm not going anywhere with her. Jack Hyde taught me that much. I'll need to find a way to get rid of Sawyer for a while. I'll think of something.

Well. I need to let Gail know that Dad will be coming next weekend. I'll put him in the guest suite. I can't believe Dad got a puppy. Well it's good for him. I hate for him to be alone, but he won't move up here with us. I've tried for ages to get him to do that and he won't hear of it. It took an act of congress to get him to accept the car we gave him for his birthday. Christian wanted to move him here on the compound, but he wouldn't even discuss it. He even offered to build him his own house down by the water along with a private dock for fishing. It may come to that one day, but for right now as long as he is happy where he is, that's fine with me.

He'll just have to put up with the mess of the new office. We all will for a while.

I can hear Gail and Grace. Down the hall. "Hi, baby." I stretch my arms out and my daughter runs to give me a hug."

"Hi Mama. I seepy head," she grins at me.

"Yes you are. Did you sleep good last night?"

"Uh huh." Gail has her up and dressed in a T-shirt and pink overalls with her little tennis shoes and her hair is brushed in place.

"Ready for breakfast angel ?" Gail asks her.

"Yeth Gay Gay. I'm hungwy. " Gail and Grace and I walk down to get my baby fed. Gail fixes her some hot French toast and some cut up fruit and a glass of milk. Which she handily destroys.

"Gail. My dad will be coming next weekend for a few days. Can you have Myra get the guest suite ready for him to stay in, please?"

"Sure. It will be nice to see your father again, Ana."

"I know. I've missed him. Oh, he has gotten a puppy and he'll be bringing it with him."

"What do you want me to do about that?" she asks.

"Well, I'm not sure. I doubt the dog will sleep outside, but maybe he would like to spend time in the yard during the day."

"I'll talk to Jason. Maybe we can erect some type of temporary fence for it to be outside in," she says.

"That sounds reasonable. Maybe a little dog house too. Thanks Gail."

"What plans do you have today, Miss Grace?" I ask her.

"Me and Bunny need.."

"Bunny and I," I correct her.

"Uh huh. We need tea and then go thwim," she lets me know.

"Baby you can't swim. Neither can Bunny. Besides it's too cold to go get in the water."

"But we want to thwim, mama."

"Well, let me think about it. I'll see what I can come up with," I tell her. I really should take her for swimming lessons this summer. But I'll be working. Maybe Christian would put in a pool. I think the kids would really like that. Christian taught Teddy to swim a couple of summers ago. That was a sight. But Christian was so patient with him. Since we do take the kids on the boat occasionally, I prefer that they both know how to swim. Yes. I'll talk to Christian about a pool.

After lunch, walking by Grace's room I can see her sharing tea with her bunny. I need to come up with a swim for her. Bunny probably needs another swim in the washing machine. Wait. I can take her in the spa downstairs. It's huge and the water is warm. It's not a pool, but it will be big to her

I run down to my room and get into my swim suit, then return to get Grace into hers. "Okay, baby. Let's get into your swim suit."

"Okay! Mama." She grins up at me. I grab her two piece out of her dresser. The one Christian was so upset about, and get her into it. "There. Well aren't you just too cute with all those pink bows." She looks so proud of her suit. "Now let's go get our pool things. I take her little hand and we get a few blow up pool toys; beach ball, inner tube, water wings. I grab a couple of beach towels and we head down to the "pool", after letting Gail know where we are going.

"Where we goin' Mama?" she asks as we head downstairs.

"Well. We are going to our little indoor pool. I don't think you've been down here before. I unlock the door to the workout room and then the door to the spa. I carefully unlock the cover to the spa and slide the top back. "Grace squeals with delight as the cover retracts and the warm water comes into view. "Mama! I din know we have a pool in the houth."

"Well, we do baby. But I want you to promise me to never, ever try to come down here by yourself. Mommy and daddy keep it locked, so you can't get in it anyway, but I still don't want you down here by yourself."

She grins and nods, " Ukay Mama." I grab Grace and we walk up the steps and then down into the warm water. I reach down and pull the toys into the water and put Grace on my lap. She is splashing around having a ball. I'm glad Christian had such a large spa built. It is almost more like a small pool than a hot tub. We do have that lap pool over there, but I think this will be more fun for Grace. I put her water wings on and she gets in her inner tube.

"I like our pool, Mama."

"Me too. You want me to show you how to float?" I ask her.

"Uh huh. Peas." I take her and place her on her back. She is not sure about getting her head wet, but she eventually relaxes. "Just relax baby. Mama's got you." I place my hand under her head and back and support her as she floats on the water. "That's my girl. You are doing so good." I take my hands away a little, but not completely. "Just look at the ceiling and relax and you can float. I'm right here and I won't let you go." About the time she really relaxes and begins to really float, Teddy comes walking in.

"Mom? What are you doing." He asks looking so bewildered.

"Hi baby. Are you home from school already?" I ask him.

"Well, I'm here, so I guess I am," he plants his hands on his hips.

"Well okay, Christian Grey. I guess you are."

"I'm Teddy, not daddy," he frowns at me.

"I know, it's just you sounded so much like your daddy just then."

Grace sits up, "I thwimmin' Teddy. Look." She tries to get on her back again, but can't. "Can't do it. Hewp me Mama." I get her on her back again and support her. She is so pleased when she floats again.

"Grace that's not a swimming pool. Are you nuts?" Teddy asks her.

"It can be a pool if Grace wants it to be, Teddy. Go get your swim suit on and get in with us."

He shrugs, "Okay. Back in a minute." He tears out of the room and returns in a few minutes in his swim suite. He climbs up the steps and before I can stop him he jumps in causing water to go everywhere.

"Teddy! No. Don't do that. You'll hurt yourself. You sit down and ease into the water. Don't ever jump in."

"Okay Mom," he says as he tries to paddle around. He is splashing and Grace just doesn't like that, so she does the obvious. She splashes him back. This invokes another splash from Teddy. I hate to see the mess being made but I can't help but join in the splashing. Teddy is bobbing around and Grace is squealing. I'm having the best time with my children in our little make believe pool.

"Here you are. What in the world are you doing?" I look up to see Christian in the doorway. He is still in his suit but his tie is loose and his shirt is unbuttoned at the top.

"Daddy! "Grace squeals.

Teddy jumps out of the water and runs up to hug Christian. "Whoa, son. You're all wet." Christian stops him just before he drenches Christian's suit.

"We're swimming Dad," Teddy tells him.

"In the hot tub?" Christian asks.

"Grace thinks it's a pool." Teddy whispers to him. "Girls aren't very smart, Dad."

"Oh, I see. A pool." Christian nods. "Well you guys have a good time. I'm going back upstairs."

"We'll be back up in a bit," I tell him still holding Grace.

We continue our splashing and fooling around. It's not long before Christian reappears and this time his is in his swim trunks. He walks over and slides into the warm water with us.

"Look Daddy. I can thwim." Grace splashes and thrashes about as I push her toward Christian and he grabs her.

"Well, that was pretty good, sweetheart," he holds her and gives her a huge kiss on her cheek.

"Remember the last time we were in this hot tub?" he looks over and asks me with a wicked grin.

"I certainly do," I give a return grin and a wink. "Maybe later."


	22. Chapter 22

_**Fifty Shades…Full Circle**_

_**Chapter 22**_

**A/N: Thanks again for all the wonderful reviews and suggestions. Just an little anecdote to pass on. While I was writing this last scene, we experienced a small trembler here in the Southland. The rafters creaked, my bed shook and things rattled on the walls. I guess Mr. Grey really can make the earth move and rock our world.**

* * *

Reentering the world after a good night's sleep I open my eyes to see Christian still asleep. I hate to wake him. He never sleeps later than I do. I don't know how he functions on as little sleep as he does. I worry so much about how hard he works and the long hours he keeps. I hate that he pushes himself so much. I know he says it's fun, but it has to be stressful. He's going to make himself sick one day and I couldn't bear to ever be without him.

I can see him begin to move and his breathing becomes deeper and faster, so I move over and lie on his back putting my arms around him. "Mmm. Good morning, Baby," he growls in his morning voice.

I gently kiss his back, "Hey there." I whisper back to him.

"What's on your agenda today?" he asks me as he turns over on his back. I continue to lie on his chest.

"Nothing specific. It's Saturday. I thought maybe we could throw the kids in the car and go do something."

"Do what?" he asks as he turns over and faces me. He strokes my hair and smiles at me.

"I have no idea. I just thought we might spend the day together. Get away from the house. We could stop at that burger place we like and then maybe go out on the boat or just drive up the coast."

"Yeah. That sounds good. I'm not sure about the boat. It's still winterized right now. I haven't gotten it ready for the summer yet. But we could get out and drive. See what the kids want to do."

"That was fun in the hot tub yesterday." I smile over at him.

"Yeah. What brought that on?" he asks.

"Grace insisted that she wanted to go swimming and it's still too cold to go out, so I improvised," I tell him. "What do you think about putting in a pool?"

"Pool?" he shrugs. " I've told you the house is yours. I expect you to take care of it, so, if you want one. Sure. Where do you want it?"

"Out back somewhere. I guess we could get a landscaper out here to work it in. Does Elliott build pools too?" I ask.

"Elliott will build anything you want. Ask him about it next time he's here."

"Okay. That was easy. I want Grace to learn to swim this summer. It will make me feel better when we go out on the boat if she can swim."

"Yep," he stretches and yawns. "Me too."

"I talked to Daddy yesterday."

"Oh yeah? How's he doing?" he asks.

"He's good. He's going to come visit for a while. He'll be here next weekend," I tell him. "He got a puppy."

"A puppy? Ray?" he looks surprised.

"Yes. He said he was lonely so he went to the pound and got a puppy. He asked if he could bring it with him. I told him he could."

"Sure that's fine. Just as long as I don't have to step in dog shit," he laughs.

"Oh, I'm sure he'll take care of him. His name is Fred."

"Who?" he asks looking perplexed.

"The dog. His name is Fred," I tell him.

"Oh. Well Fred is more than welcome to visit," he says. "Didn't you mention something about getting Teddy a dog last summer?"

"I did. Maybe this will be a good time to see if he is interested in getting one. Jason is going to check into putting up some sort of temporary fence for him to go outside in the yard. And get him a little dog house."

"Sort of doggie guest quarters?" he smiles at me.

"Yes. I want dad to be comfortable and if that means taking care of Fred, then that's what we'll do."

"Come here beautiful," Christian says as he pulls me up to get a good morning kiss.

"Okay, gang. Breakfast is on." I can hear them as all three scamper down to the table.

Teddy comes running in and slides in his chair. He is followed by Christian who is carrying Grace. Christian puts Grace in her booster chair as I pour the kids a glass of milk. I get his coffee and my tea and we sit down to our Saturday morning breakfast.

"What do you kids have planned this morning?" I ask as I help Grace's plate with waffles and bacon.

"Well. I was thinking about playing some baseball." Teddy informs us. "Dad can you throw me the ball some?" he asks Christian.

"Well. I'll be glad to but I thought we might do something else instead," he smiles over at Teddy.

"What?"

"Well, your mom wanted to get in the car and take a little trip."

"To where?" he looks over at me.

"I don't know," I shrug. "Just get in the car and go where ever we want to go," I tell him.

"Is it one of those trips where we drive all day and you guys talk and look around?" he asks me.

"Well, I thought we might stop and get burgers for lunch and then just see where we end up."

"Mom…I can go for the burgers, but I definitely don't want to spend all day sitting in the back seat while you and Dad hold hands and make funny faces at each other," Teddy advises me in his grown up voice. " We did that before and it's not any fun."

"Yeah. No fun Mama," Grace chimes in as she stuffs a piece of waffle in her face.

I'm flabbergasted, "Well I just thought that we might enjoy all being together today. Daddy isn't going to work and I thought we could all spend the time doing something as a family."

"I think we should all play baseball together," Teddy suggests.

"Well, so much for our adventure. I guess I'm out voted." I feel so disappointed.

Grace violently shakes her head, "No venture, Mama. No venture."

"Well, okay. Baseball it is champ," Christian grins at Teddy.

"Grace what do you want to do baby?" I ask her.

"Pay wif babies. "

"You want to play with your dolls?" I ask and she nods. "Well okay. I guess I can find something to read." I shrug. "A quiet day at Grey Manor it is."

"What's Grey Manners?" Teddy asks.

"I was just teasing. I was calling the house Grey Manor, because it belongs to us and it's big."

He gives me his 'so freaking what' shrug.

"But can we at least go get some burgers at some point today?" I ask.

"Yes, Mrs. Grey. I will personally make sure that you get a hamburger today," Christian smiles over at me. "I certainly want you to have what you need," he gives me a sly grin.

"I trust you will, Mr. Grey."

"See you're doing it again," Teddy whines." You're making those funny faces."

"Get over it Theodore. Eat your breakfast and we'll head outside," Christian says licking the syrup off of his finger.

At the end of breakfast I make an announcement. "Okay, family. New rule starting today. After every meal each person will take his or her plate and glass to the kitchen. No more jumping up from the table and leaving it for someone else to clean up."

"What?" Teddy asks. "But that's Gail's job."

"Did you eat?" Christian asks him.

"Yeah."

"What?" Christian asks him.

"Yes, sir."

"Then since you enjoyed your meal, you need to help by taking your plate to the kitchen. No one is here to serve you, Mr. Grey."

"But why do we have to start doing that? Are you gonna' do it?" he asks his dad.

"Well, I seem to have helped by paying for the food on the table. Your Mom helped by cooking the food. Is it too much to ask for you to help by picking up your plate and taking it in to the kitchen?"

"I guess not." He pouts and squirms in his chair.

"Okay. Enough said on the subject," Christian announces.

"Can I be excused?" he asks.

"Yes you _may_. Go brush your teeth and I'll meet you in the back yard," Christian tells him.

Teddy jumps down and starts to take off. "AFTER you take your plate to the kitchen," Christian corrects him.

"Me too." Grace says . I grab her as she starts to jump off her booster seat. "Sweetie, I'll help you with your plate," I tell her. I don't need to pick up sticky broken china off the floor. I help her down and put her plate in her hands, "Both hands. Use both hands. I'll bring your glass."

Grace carefully walks into the kitchen with me following closely behind her. I help her get it on the counter. "Thank you baby. You did a good job." I give her a kiss on her head. "Now go brush your teeth."

Christian walks in carrying some of the dishes from the table and sets them on the counter. I feel the warmth of his arms circling my waist. "You know this is going to cause you more work having them do this." He buries his nose in my hair.

"I know. But they need to learn. Life isn't a free ride, even if you are Christian Grey's children." I lean back into his chest. "Thanks for backing me up on this."

"Not a problem. You're right. They need to start helping out a bit."

I turn around and let his lips take mine as I wrap my arms around him. "Mmm. You taste like waffles." I murmur against his mouth.

"You taste like bacon," he grins against me. "I'd like to make an appointment with you for later this evening," he says between kisses.

"Okay. For what?" I let his mouth seal against mine again.

"For a little tie me up, tie me down time."

"I warn you, I'm having onions on my burger later," I smile against his mouth.

"I've been in worse situations. I can handle it," he grins. "I'll counter you by having onions too."

Relaxing against him I want to consume him here in the kitchen.

"Dad!" we hear our son yell from the back yard. "DAD!"

"COMING TEDDY." Christian yells back. "Speedy little bastard, isn't he? I'll catch you later, Mrs. Grey."

After I finish the kitchen, I walk out on the patio and watch Christian and Teddy pitch the ball for a while. "Good catch Teddy!" Way to go Daddy." "You almost caught it Ted." That's about as much as I want to participate in ball tossing. I walk back in the house and go up to check on Grace. She has her baby doll totally naked and is trying to put more clothes on her.

"Be thtill baby. I haf to put cwos on you," she fusses at the inanimate baby.

The poor doll's hair is mutilated where Grace gave it a 'trim' a few months ago. Christian wanted to get her a new one after he saw how bad it looked, but I told him she would enjoy this one just as much. I think I'll go down to the library, before they destroy it Monday and read a little.

Making myself a cup of tea first I head to the library and look for a book. "Ah," I pull a book from the shelf. The Mayor of Casterbridge_**; **_The Life and Death of a Man of Character, by Thomas Hardy. I haven't read that in years. I take the book and curl up on the down sofa in the library and begin to read. "One evening of late summer, before the nineteenth century had reached one-third of its span, a young man and woman, the latter carrying a child, were approaching the large village of Weydon-Priors, in Upper Wessex, on foot."

Several pages into the book, Grace comes toddling in with her baby doll. "Mama?" she peeks around the door.

I look up at her. "Hi Sweetie. What are you up to?" Grace runs over and crawls up on the sofa next to me.

"Rweed, Mama."

"Baby, I don't think you'll like this very much," I try to explain.

"Uh huh. Rweed it to me. Pweas?" She looks up at me through those dark lashes and I can't resist. I begin to read to her. "But there was more in that tent than met the cursory glance; and the man, with the instinct of a perverse character, scented it quickly. After a…."

Grace is staring up at me totally bewildered and a very perplexed look on her face. "What's wrong, Sweetie?"

"What did you thay Mama?" she asks me. "I din unersand." She shakes her head and looks at me.

"I told you, you wouldn't like this book."

"Uh huh. I like it. Rweed more." She insists. So I continue to read to her. It doesn't take long before I can hear a little snort and look down to see her asleep lying next to me with her little baby doll. I run my hand through her curls and continue to read to myself.

I feel Christian softly kiss my forehead and tuck a strand of hair behind my ear and I open my eyes and look up at him. "I must have fallen asleep reading," I croak at him. Grace is still asleep.

"Shhh. Don't move." Christian whispers. "Both of my girls sleeping so peacefully. Nothing's more beautiful."

"What time is it?" I ask him.

"It's mid-afternoon. I wanted to check and see what time you want to go eat." Grace stirs and with her eyes still closed she moves over in Christian's lap.

"We had a late breakfast. I guess we could eat a combined lunch dinner. I'm sure the kids will want snacks watching TV this evening."

"Okay, then. Let's get ready and go eat these hamburgers you're having a fit for." He pops me on my butt and then rubs the spot that his spanked. "Just a reminder about our appointment for later," he gives me a wicked smile.

"I haven't forgotten."

* * *

"I want ketchup!" Teddy yells.

"Yes, son I heard you the first time," Christian tells Teddy.

"Chocwhat. I want chocwhat, Daddy," Grace is screaming from her car seat.

"No cheese on mine. And I want Chocolate, too," I tell him.

"Okay. Everybody just stop! I can't do this with everybody talking at once," Christian says sternly Mr. CEO is evidently is have difficulty taking food orders.

"Now. One at a time. Teddy what do you want?" he asks.

"Hamburger with ketchup and French fries and a chocolate milk shake," he says.

"Okay, Grace. What so you want?" he asks.

"But nothing else. Just ketchup, Dad," Teddy chimes in again.

"I've got it son. Grace?"

I wan booger wif man…mansays.

"Mayonnaise," I help her out.

"Uh huh. an finch fies an coke," she finishes.

"You don't want a milkshake?" I ask her.

"Uh huh. Chocwhat."

"Grace? Coke or milkshake?" Christian asks her.

"Uh huh. Coke and mikthak. Chocwhat."

"Just get her both and I'll finish what she doesn't," I tell him.

"Well, what do you want?" he asks me.

"I want a hamburger, with mustard, lettuce, tomato, pickles. And fries and a chocolate shake."

"No onions?" he smiles.

"I'll be kind Mr. Grey."

"Okay that's, one burger with ketchup, one with mayonnaise, one with mustard, lettuce, tomato and pickles, three fries, three chocolate shakes and one coke."

"Right. I tell him. And whatever you want."

Christian shakes his head and places our order.

"I'm impressed. You did that very well and under such pressure," I grin at him.

"I'd rather negotiate a government contract than do this. It's far less complicated," he complains.

"Where the boogers, Daddy?" Grace asks.

"They have to cook them Grace. They will be here in a few minutes."

"But I hungwee now."

"I'm sorry. It will be here in a few minutes. Just hold on," I can hear his frustration level rising.

"Ooww. Mom Grace hit me," Teddy whines.

"Grace! Don't hit Teddy. In fact don't even touch him," I scold her.

"I no hit Tiddy, Mama," Grace says .

"Yes you did," Teddy insists. "Yes she did Mom."

"Okay. Okay. Both of you keep your hands to yourselves." I give out a big sigh.

"Are we having fun yet?" Christian asks me.

"Yes. We are." I glare at him.

Finally I see the food coming. Christian pays the carhop while I get in the back seat and get the kids situated. I fold down the table that is in the middle between them and Christian hands me their food. I let Grace out of her car seat so she can have better access to the food. I get their burgers unwrapped and their fries spread out with the ketchup on them. I ordered an empty small cup to pour Grace's shake in and make sure the tops are secured to their drinks with the straws in them. "Okay. Are you both set?" I ask. They nod as they bite into their food and I return to the front seat and begin to unwrap my food. "Good grief. What an ordeal."

"Grace! Stop it." Teddy fusses at her.

"What now?" Christian asks.

"Grace threw a French fry at me," Teddy complains.

"GRACE! What have you been told?" Christian barks looking at her in the rear view mirror.

"Thawy, daddy. I be good gurl," she grins at her dad with ketchup all over her face.

I finally get a good bite of the delicious greasy delight that I've been craving, "Mmmm.  
I've been needing that. It's so good." I mumble through the mouthful.

Christian reaches over and rubs my thigh, "I'm glad it's good, baby."

"How's yours?" I ask him.

"Good. It's not Steak Diane, but it has its merits," he smiles over at me with his mouth full.

"Remember last time we were here?" I ask him.

"Yep! I do believe today is even more traumatic than that day," he gives me a big grin. "But I still like my vanilla," he tells me taking a big sip of his shake and winking at me. "Just not tonight."

"AHHHH! Mama!" I hear Grace scream.

"I don't want to look," I tell Christian.

"I've been waiting for it. It was just a matter of time," Christian says.

I look in the back seat to see Teddy covered in chocolate shake and most of the beige leather seat coated in runny ice cream.

"I'll get it," Christian reaches for his door handle. "You finish your food."

"I'm sorry daddy." Teddy almost cries. "I didn't mean to. I was being careful."

Christian opens Teddy's door and removes him from the car and begins the job of cleaning him up and trying to clean the car seat. "It's okay, son. Those are big cups and they're hard to hold sometimes."

"Sweetheart, there are baby wipes in the console," I tell Christian. We're in my A8 and he doesn't know where I keep everything.

"Mama. Tiddy spiw it. It make mess aaawl ober," Grace tattles.

"Yes, baby. I know," I sigh. " Daddy will take care of it."

Christian returns Teddy to the car and gets back in his seat. "I'm so sorry, Sweetheart," I tell Christian. "I thought this would be fun."

"I'm having a ball," he says sarcastically.

"You'll look back on this with fond memories," I tell him.

"Hard as I try to forget it," he smiles over at me. "I'm feeling a little loss of control right now. I may need to regain it later this evening."

"Yes, sir. I'm all yours," I tell him.

"Darn right you are."

* * *

The kids are bathed and in bed and Christian is catching up on the news on TV.

"I'm going up and get ready. Give me five minutes," I lean over and whisper to him.

He gives me a wicked grin and traces my jaw with his finger before giving me a soft kiss, "I'll be up. Panties only."

"Yes sir." I can feel his excitement already.

After checking on the children, I set the baby monitors so we can hear if the kids get up. Then I get washed up and my teeth brushed. Pulling my hair back I braid it and secure it with a tie. Getting undressed I find my white satin and lace thong and slip into it. Christian likes the white ones. Guess it looks virginal. I look at myself in the mirror; white thong, bare breasts long braid, moderately flat tummy and firm butt. I wonder if I'll ever get too old for this or if we'll still be playing when we're eighty. I guess as long as we can still do it without breaking a hip, we will. I take my place on my knees next to our bed and wait; eyes looking down.

I hear Christian as he walks in the room and I can hear the lock as he secures the door. He silently disappears into his dressing room and after a minute I can see his bare feet and the ragged hem of his jeans as he walks toward me. He stops in front of me and strokes my head, "I'm pleased, Anastasia."

He walks toward a locked chest in his dressing room and removes the lock opening the drawers. I watch his feet as he returns to me.

"Stand up," he extends his hand and helps me to my feet. "Hands out."

I hold my hands out to him and he gently places the leather straps on my wrists and secures them together. He leans in and softly kisses my bare breasts scarcely touching my skin with his lips. "So soft," he whispers.

"Now. Stand facing the bed."

I comply and feel his finger as it traces the top of my thong against my skin. He stops and pulls on the elastic letting it pop back against my abdomen. "I like the white ones," he leans in and whispers. "Spread your feet," he commands me. I can feel him secure a leather cuff to one ankle and then he smacks my inner thigh, "Farther," making me spread my legs farther apart for him. I then feel the other cuff on my other ankle as he secures a spreader bar to me. He stands up and nuzzles my neck and I feel his hot breath against my skin as he trails kisses down my neck and cups one of my breasts in his palm.

I jump as he pulls his fingers between my thighs. "Mmm. Already wet. I like that."

Still standing behind, me he stretches his arm out and holds something out in front of me, "Look. I've bought you a gift." I try to focus on the metal collar that has 'Christian's' spelled out in studs on it. "Do you like it?" he asks.

I nod.

"Well? Do you like it?"

"Yes sir. I like it very much." I respond.

I feel the cold metal against my skin as Christian secures the collar around my neck with a snap of the clasp. "There. It fits. You belong to me. You've given yourself to me and I will take care of you Anastasia," he says as he kisses my neck again.

I am so turned on it's driving me crazy. All I know right now is that I want him. I want him to take me and fill his need for control over me. I need for him to give me what I want and so desperately need. I can hear Christian set the iPod to, Enigma, MCMXC A.D., some of our favorite 'playroom' music, and dim the lights in the bedroom.

"Now. What to do with you. What would please me Anastasia?" he contemplates aloud. " I think your ass is far to pale. Exquisite but it needs color." He observes as he strokes and squeezes it his eager hands. " I need to brighten it up a bit," he says. "Don't you agree?"

"Yes sir. That would make me happy," I respond to him agreeing.

"It doesn't matter if you're happy as long as I am," he growls as he yanks my braid back giving him access to my neck. I can feel his tongue as he licks my cheek, then nips my earlobe. Just his touch is pushing me higher. I can feel my skin flushing and my muscles tightening as my will evaporates.

My breathing is becoming irregular as my arousal builds. I feel myself begin to ache for him. I want, no I need for him to punish me, to touch me, to make me come. I can feel his hand slide down my back and come to rest on my butt; rubbing and gently massaging it. Oh, shit that's what I want. He knows my body as well as I do. "So needy, baby. Do you need me? Do you want this?" he whispers.

"Yes," is all I can reply.

"Yes?" he queries.

"Yes. I want you. I need you. Please." I gasp.

"All in good time, baby," is his answer. "First things first."

I can feel him back away and then the bite of the crop as it licks my skin. I gasp as I feel the first sting. Then his hand again. It is soft against the smarting spot on my ass. "Quiet , baby. Don't make any noise," he whispers in my ear.

Christian begins to tap the crop across my ass in small flicking motions, moving slowly down my legs and back up again, stopping to tap between my thighs several times. The gentle pain is welcomed against the needy spot. Then the sting on my other butt cheek as the crop makes contact again. "Sshhh. Not a sound," he murmurs.

I can feel him back away and then the sting of the crop as it licks my skin. I gasp as I feel the first sting. Then his hand again. It is soft against the smarting spot on my ass. "Quiet , baby. Don't make any noise," he whispers in my ear.

Christian begins to tap the crop across my ass in small flicking motions, moving slowly down my legs and back up again stopping to tap between my legs several times. Then the sting on my other butt cheek as the crop makes contact again. "Sshhh. Not a sound," he murmurs.

His fingers glide between my thighs again. "God, your wet. I assume that means you are ready for me. But not yet. You'll get the pleasure of having me, when I'm ready," I hear his growl.

I can feel his mouth kiss my shoulders and trail kisses and warm wet, licks of his tongue down my back. Kneeling behind me, he stops at my butt and nips at my skin with his teeth. He lowers himself and the feel his copper hair brush against my inner thighs. I briefly shudder and gasp uncontrollably at his touch. "I told you not to make a sound. Now you'll have to wait again."

Christian stands up and walks away returning to me with the flogger. "Bend over. On the bed arms out."

I do as I am told and put my torso on the bed. I jump as the first slap hits my ass. "STILL. Don't move," he orders me.

I try not to move when the next smack hits me, then another and another. Christian bends down and kisses my ass again. "There. Nice and pink. Just the way I like it to look. Almost good enough to eat," he grins. "I'm going to touch you now, Anastasia. But you will not come yet. Do you understand me?"

"Yes sir. I'll try."

"Don't just try. You will not come. Here raise your head up." I do as I am told and Christian places a blind fold over my eyes. I can hear the music and I can hear him, but I can no longer see what is going on. I hear a slight buzzing noise and can feel Christian as he wraps his arm around my hips and then makes contact between my thighs. The vibration is over the top. He has one of those finger vibrators on and is driving me insane. I am gasping and writhing under his touch.

"Don't move. Just take what I'm giving you. It's a gift."

I can feel myself quickly building and I want to come so badly. I try my best not to. But I am about to fall over. I can't help it.

Christian abruptly stops and moves his finger. "Not yet. I'll tell you when. Remember you are mine and I'll give you the pleasure I think you deserve and want you to have. Nothing more."

I am heaving trying to catch my breath as Christian drags the small vibrating instrument over my skin; across my cheek and lips, down my neck, over my breasts, down my belly and then I can feel it again. My hands fist the duvet as he massages with his finger and tortures me with the vibrations. "I know, baby. It feels so good. I know you want to come, but you can't." He stops again and I want to cry with frustration.

I gasp and try to catch my breath again. I feel a sting as Christian's palm slaps against my already sensitive ass. I inadvertently let out a small whimper.

"Oh, Anastasia. You've disobeyed me. You made a noise," he chastises me. "I guess we'll have to start over again." I can feel his erection under his jeans press against me. "Do you feel this? It's waiting for you. All you have to do is wait until I'm ready for you to have it."

I know he can't last much longer, so I should get my release soon. If I don't, I may go insane. He hasn't been like this in ages. The kids must have really stressed him out. But I like it. He feels so powerful, so commanding, so in control of me. He's my Fifty again. I want him to take me. I want him to make me do his will because I have none of my own. I am his to use and I have given myself to him completely.

"Okay once more. If you're a good girl, I'll let you come," he whispers. "Remember you are mine. Totally mine." I can feel his fingers again as he touches me and presses the vibration against me. Fuck. I can't stand much more. I need to come so badly. If I obey him, he'll let me. I try not to move or make a sound. "Good, baby." He murmurs against my neck. "You can come now, baby. I know you need to." I can feel every muscle in my body getting tight. The perspiration is dripping from my body making my contact with his skin slick. "That's good. You're almost there. I know it feels so good," he kisses my hair as he continues to push me higher. "My sweet baby. You're gonna' come so damn hard. Then I'm going to fuck you just as hard."

My breathing is hitching and my tummy quivering as he drives me toward my climax. Finally I can take no more; thrusting my hips into his hand I tense and my breathing stops. My god I think I will faint. I feel lightheaded as the wonderful release takes me. I hear "AAHHGG. DAMN," coming from me, but don't remember saying it. My hands are clawing the duvet as he holds me tight still forcing the spasms out of me. My chest begins to heave as I try to breath and my body is shuddering violently under my husband and master.

"That's it. Just ride it out, baby," he whispers. I have no choice but to accept it and ride it out. The spasms are hard and seem to go on forever, but eventually begin to ease and release their hold on me. Collapsing against the bed my breathing resumes. I am gasping for air as I feel Christian stop and remove his palm from between my legs. He sweetly kisses my shoulders and I feel him release his grip on me. He glides his soft warm hands down my sides as they come to rest on my hips.

I feel him on his knees behind me and hear his zipper as he opens his jeans. His hands firmly grasp my hips, "Hold on, Anastasia. This will be very quick and very hard. Don't make a sound."

I nod as I grab the duvet in my hands. Without warning I feel him fully inside. I want to gasp, but I resist the urge, accepting him. He grabs my braid like it was the reins of a bridle. I feel his hips roll back and he leaves me. Suddenly I feel all of him again and hear his skin as it slaps against mine. It's harsh, but so fucking erotic. I haven't been this turned on in ages. I don't try to move or resist. I lie still on the bed and take what he is giving me; letting him have his way and giving me what I need. He hasn't been like this in ages. He is taking me; all of me and showing me no mercy. I can do nothing but lie there helpless underneath him; accepting what he is giving me. "Don't come. I've given you yours. This is mine," he growls.

I can hear his breathing become ragged as he picks up speed. He is like a violent storm, his waves crashing on my shore; over and over, relentless. "You. Are. Mine. Only. Mine." he snarls as he continues his race toward his release. "FUCK! Take it all." He growls as he climbs higher and pushes farther. He releases my hair as he digs both hands into my hips. I hear his breathing stop as he stills and begins to shudder against me. "Fucking. Shit. AHHH." I can hear as he loses himself in his release, letting it race through him.

Finally I can feel him fall on me exhausted and spent. His heart is racing and his breathing is rapid as he tries to regain his senses. He wraps me in his arms and sweetly kisses my shoulders as his hand reaches up and he removes my blindfold. "My sweet, sweet baby," he murmurs against my skin. "You are fucking amazing."

I sense the growing emptiness as he shrinks and leaves me. He sits back on his heels heaving and exhausted. Then he releases the bonds on my ankles and wrists, rubbing them to get the circulation going. Limp like a rag doll, I fall into his lap and he pulls me against him as we fall back on the soft carpet below us.

I am engulfed in his embrace and he strokes my face pushing the soaking strands of hair away from my eyes. His lips tenderly kiss my face as I smile, totally content and at peace. Christian reaches down and removes the collar from my neck and tosses it aside. "I adore you," he whispers as he stares into my blue eyes. "Totally, fucking adore you."

After we regain our senses and our strength, Christian carries me to the bed and makes incredible, vanilla love to me as he always does after we play. We fall asleep wrapped in each other, totally besotted with each other. I have given myself to him and he has cared for me and loved me.

I wake and he is still sleeping. He had a busy day with the kids and then being lord and master over me. I get up and quickly pick up our instruments of play and stash them in his cabinet. Walking back over to the bed I spy the collar that ended up under the bed. I reach under and pick up 'my gift' inspecting it as I didn't get a good look at it earlier. I wonder how in the world he got this. He had to have it made. It says 'Christian's', not in studs as I thought , but in pearls set into filigree metal. It's a white metal, gold or maybe platinum. It looks like an oversized filigree bracelet with a clasp at the back. It is just exquisite, for what it is. Too bad I can't show it to anybody.

I put it in the chest with the other dirty little secrets hidden in there. Christian has the key, somewhere, I hope. I'll let him lock it. I check the baby monitors and my children are sleeping peacefully. Returning to bed, I snuggle in next to him and fall back to sleep next to the father of my children, my master, my husband and the love of my life.

**Ray comes for a visit in the next chapter.**


	23. Chapter 23

_**Fifty Shades…Full Circle**_

_**Chapter 23**_

**A/N: Once again thank you for all the kind reviews and messages. I appreciate each and every one of them. They are the only way I know to keep writing.**

* * *

"Daddy." I throw my arms around Ray Steele and hug him like he won't break. "I've missed you so much."

"Hi, baby. It's good to see you," he hugs back.

I hear a little growl and bark. I loosen my hold and look down to see a scruffy, little, yellow ball of fur at the end of a leash. "Is that Fred?" I ask wiping the tears from my face.

"That's my boy." Daddy proudly grins and looks down at the yellow fur ball. "He doesn't like anybody touching me. But he'll get used to you."

"Well come in. Both of you." I move back and let my father and his new 'child' enter the house.

"How was your trip?" I ask.

"In that car? Like a dream," he grins. "I had to make a few pit stops for Fred, but we made good time."

"Come in and let me look at you," I scan him up and down. "You look good. Have you been getting enough to eat?" I ask.

"Oh yeah. If I don't do anything else, I eat good." He stares at me. "You look good, baby girl. How is everything?" putting his arm around me we walk to the family room and sit down, Fred in tow.

"I'm good. The kids and Christian keep me busy. I start my new job in a couple of weeks. I'm excited about that. Oh, does Fred need to go out? We put in a temporary fence for him to run around in."

"I'll take him out in a few minutes. He just relieved himself a little while ago. He's a pretty good dog. Smart too. He catches on real quick." He reaches down and strokes the puppy scratching him behind his ears.

"Daddy are you really lonely?" I ask.

"Not enough to move up here." He shakes his head. "I'm comfortable at home in my own house. Fred is just enough to keep me company. I'm fine, Ana. Just fine."

"You'll tell me when you're ready to move up here with us?" I ask.

"I will. But don't hold your breath. It'll be a long time," he grins.

Gail walks in with a cup of coffee and hands it to dad, "Mr. Steele. It's good to see you again. You look well."

"I am Gail. You look good yourself. In fact If you weren't married to that Jason guy, I'd take you back with me," he laughs.

"Mr. Steele! You just won't do." Gail smiles at him. "If I weren't married to that Jason guy, I just might go." She looks down, "Well this must be Fred." Gail reaches down and rubs Fred's tummy. "I've heard a lot about you young man. Isn't he cute?"

"He's not cute. He's a guard dog. He can be a terror when he wants to," Dad laughs.

"Yeah. I can see that. He'd scare the pants off of a burglar," she laughs. "Can I get you something to eat?"

"No thanks, Gail. We're fine. Had lunch a little while ago." He blows on his coffee and takes a sip.

"Okay. Let me know if I can get you anything." She turns to walk away, "That goes for Cujo, too."

"Where are my grand- kids?" he asks.

"Grace is still napping and Teddy should be home from school any time. He'll be pretty wound up. Today is the last day before summer vacation."

"Ana," he puts his hand on mine, "sweetie, I never knew what to say about, well about the baby. I'm not real good at that sort of thing, but it broke my heart."

I get teary, "I know, Daddy. It broke my heart too. Christian was devastated over it. But we are moving on and getting better." I give him a teary smile.

"I never asked what happened. Just that it was an accident and that you fell down some stairs. If you ever want to talk about it….you know." He looks so uncomfortable. I'd never burden him with the truth about what really happened. What he knows is enough.

I can hear the door open, "Grandpa Ray?" Teddy screams running in.

"In here big fella'," Daddy yells back.

Teddy tears in the family room and throws himself at my father. "Grandpa Ray! I missed you. I'm so glad you're here."

"Well I missed you too, Teddy. Watch out for my coffee." He sets his cup on the coffee table.

"Whoa! A dog!" Teddy marvels. "Can I pet him?" he asks.

"Sure can. His name is Fred," daddy tells him.

Teddy gets on the floor and the puppy jumps in his lap and licks him all over his face. Teddy laughs and giggles. "Hi Fred."

"Well looks like Fred has a new friend." Daddy watches Teddy with his dog.

"I like him." Teddy grins up at us.

"Excuse me. Mrs. Grey."

I turn to look behind me, "Yes Myra? Oh, Myra. This is my father Mr. Steele. He'll be with us for a few days."

"Yes ma'am. I just wanted to let you know the guest quarters are ready." She smiles at Daddy, "Nice to meet you Mr. Steele. Just let me know if you need anything. I'll be glad to get it for you."

"Thanks. And nice to meet you too, Myra." He looks at me and whispers, "When did you get her?"

"Oh, a while back. The house and kids were just too much for Gail. She has worked out really well and she's very nice."

"Not bad looking either," he adds.

"Daddy, will you please stop hitting on the house staff," I tease him. "I'd like to keep them around and I don't need you running them off."

He chuckles, "You know me. I'm all bark."

"There's my sleepy girl." Grace comes walking in rubbing her eyes, rabbit in hand and I pull her into my lap. "Look who came to see you."

Grace suddenly becomes bashful, burying her head in me and grinning. "It's Grandpa Ray."

"Hi Gampa Way," she gives him a sheepish grin.

"Hi darlin'. How's the prettiest little girl in the world?" he smiles at her and reaches over to pat her leg. When she decides he won't bite her, she crawls over in his lap and gives him a hug.

"Well it was worth the drive just for that." He smiles down at her and gives her a squeeze.

About that time Fred jumps up and Grace looks at him like he's a two headed monster.

"Wuz that?" she asks.

"That's Fred," Teddy tells her.

"Wuz a Fwed?" she asks.

"Fred's a puppy, stupid." Teddy gives her a look.

"Teddy." I warn him.

"Hi puppy," she smiles down at the dog. "I have a wabbit," she shows the stuffed toy to the puppy.

"Honey, be careful. Fred might get hold of rabbit and he'll be gone."

She looks down at the fur ball. "No. No. Fwed. My wabbit." she scolds him.

"I'll get Jason to go get your luggage out of the car and take it to your room, Dad. Is the car open?"

"Yeah. It's open. I figured with all your security, it would be safe to leave it unlocked. And Fred's bed, toys and bowls are in the back. You can just put them in my room."

"You bought Fred toys?" I ask.

"Of course. The boy's got to have something to do when he isn't chasing intruders," he smiles.

We get dad settled and Fred is out in the back yard with Teddy running around. We are in the family room catching up, "Ray!" I hear Christian walk through the door. He comes in and walks in the family room and shakes dad's hand. "Don't get up. Keep your seat. It's good to see you."

"Good to see you Christian. You look fit."

"I try. I don't get to run as much as I used to. But I work at it. Did you have a good drive up?" he asks as he loosens his tie.

"Yes. That car you gave me is like driving a Lazy Boy."

"Well, I'm glad you are enjoying it. That's why we gave it to you." He looks over at me, "I'm going up and get out of this suit. I'll be back down in a few minutes." He gives me a quick kiss. "Love you."

"Okay. Dinner will be a while."

"You all sure seem happy, sweetie," Dad tells me

"We are dad. Things are really good," I assure him.

"I like to hear that. That mess from last year is all cleared up?" he asks.

"Absolutely. Just a bump in the road," I tell him.

"Well, they do come along. Staying married is a hard job. It's nice to see you got through it. What say we go outside and check on Teddy and Cujo?"

We finish dinner and Dad, Christian, the kids and Fred head out to the patio. I stay inside to help get things cleaned up and can hear the conversation. Teddy is still playing with Fred. One of them is bound to get tired at some point. At least I hope so. Teddy insisted on feeding Fred and taking him out to potty after he ate.

The days are getting longer and there is still enough daylight left to watch the sun set over the water. The kaleidoscope of colors that reflect off of the water is just magnificent. I love our house. I love living here with my family. I'm not sure just what I did to deserve all of this, but I'm so grateful for all of it. We have the retractable patio doors open and I can hear Christian and Daddy talking outside.

"You really have a great place here. Must be nice being on the water. You can just walk out and go fishing anytime you want," Dad marvels as he sips a beer.

"Well, you can have a place on the water anytime you choose. All you have to do is let me know and it's yours," Christian tells him taking a sip of his wine.

"Ah. I know. I'm just not ready to move yet. Maybe one day. But I appreciate the offer, Christian."

"It's an open ended offer. No expiration date. Just say the word."

"How are things going at work?" Dad asks him.

"Oh, busy. Things never seem to stop. As soon as one thing is settled another one pops up."

"Well, I don't even pretend to understand what it is you do, but looking around," he waves his arm beer in hand to include everything," you seem to be pretty good at it."

"I enjoy what I do. I guess if you enjoy it, then it's easy to be good at it," Christian muses.

"Well you must damn well be tickled to death doing it," he chuckles. "Teddy sure has taken a shine to Fred."

"I think it's mutual." Christian says. "Ana had mentioned getting him a dog last summer, but we just never got around to it." Christian rubs his hand over his eyes. "It's been a busy year."

"Yeah. Christian, I'm glad you and Ana got everything worked out. She seems really happy."

"Ray, you have no idea how scared I was of losing her. I couldn't live without Ana."

"That's what a father wants to hear. Just keep it zipped up from now on."

I freeze and then decide to walk out and save my husband….. or my father.

"Hi you two. What's going on out here?" I ask as I walk out and sit in Christian's lap. Christian puts his arm around my waist and gives me a hug as I take a sip of his wine. I give him a knowing smile and a kiss. "It's okay," I whisper in his ear.

"Oh, just watching the kids and Fred. They're having a ball," Dad says.

"Good. It's beginning to get chilly. Do you want to go inside?" I ask.

"I'd like to do a little work, but I have no place to do it," Christian gives me dirty look.

"Don't look at me like that." I scold him. "I asked you how many times about that office?"

"What happened?" Dad leans over and asks.

"Ana needed an office to work from home in, so I told her to build one. Now it seems she has taken part of mine to do it. My entire office is covered in plastic tarps and I can't find anything."

"I asked you to help me decide where to put it and you refused. You get what you ask for," I tell him taking another sip from his glass.

"You could have warned me. I walked in Monday evening expecting to get some work done and my office only had three walls," he sneers at me.

"It'll get better. They're getting your wall back up this week. By the time they're finished, you won't know it's been done. It'll just seem a little smaller in there," I snicker.

Christian squeezes my ass and gives me a smirk.

"I think the dust is driving Myra crazy. She's so careful about keeping the house clean and the dust from the construction is settling on everything. She can't keep up with it." I giggle. "I've tried to tell her not to worry about it. It's a losing battle until the office is finished."

" I guess she just wants to do a good job." Dad says. "Well. I've had a long day. I think it's time for Fred and me to hit the sack."

"Oh, already?" I whine.

"Yep." He stands up and stretches finishing his beer. "I'm not sure Teddy is going to give me my dog back." He whistles. "YO! FRED! Come here boy."

Fred stops and looks over at dad then runs to him. "See I told you he was smart."

"He knows who feeds him," Christian mumbles.

Dad bends down and picks up Fred and heads into the house. "Daddy, let me know if you need anything, okay?"

"I will, baby. I think me and Fred got everything we need. But I'll holler at you if we don't. Good night kids."

"Night Daddy."

"Good night Ray." Christian grumbles.

Teddy runs over to us and collapses on me, "Goodness, your sweaty." I tell him running my hand through his hair. "You'll need a bath before bed."

"I know," he huffs. "Fred likes to run."

"You seem to like Fred," I observe.

"Uh huh. He's fun." Teddy mumbles as he sits down in a chair. "Can we get a dog?"

"Well we'll see. I was sort of thinking that way," I tell him.

Grace is still wandering around in the yard. "Grace! Honey it's time to come in. It's getting dark."

"K Mama. I comin." She runs up to the patio and joins us.

We gather our kids and head into the house. We get them bathed and in bed and stories read.

We're heading to our room and I decide to detour, "I'm going to check on dad. I'll be in in a minute." I give Christian a quick kiss.

"Okay. I'll get the water started. Don't be long."

I gently tap on the door to the guest suite. "Come on in." I hear. Dad is sitting in an easy chair, TV on a sports channel, beer in hand and Fred asleep at his feet.

"Hey dad. I just wanted to check in on you before we go to bed."

"Come on in baby. I'm fine. Got everything we need," he tells me. "Even a fully stocked mini fridge."

I walk in and sit down on the sofa next to his chair. "Dad."

"Yeah? What is it?"

"I wasn't being nosey, but I heard what you said to Christian."

"What?"

"Well the part about keeping his pants zipped," I twist my fingers in my lap. "Daddy. Christian didn't sleep with anyone else. I just want you to know that. I know there was a lot on TV about it and they implied that he had an affair. I've never talked to you about it. But.."

"But, what sweetie?"

"Christian did have a relationship of sorts with someone. And I'm not saying that it was okay for him to do that. It wasn't. But he never slept with her. I'm sure of that. I know he didn't."

"Okay. If you say so baby. I'll trust you," he says.

"I just don't want you to think that he was unfaithful to me. I mean he was in a way, but not physically. Anyway. We've worked it out and I don't want you to think badly of him. He loves me more than anything. I know that. You never have to worry about him having an affair or leaving us. "

"Well. You're my daughter. I love you more than anything. He's your choice and I respect that choice. But I won't let him treat you badly. You have a daughter. You understand what I'm saying. I think a lot of Christian. He's been good to you and he certainly loves you. I can see that. If you say everything is okay then I trust you that it is. He may have a bazillion dollars in the bank, but you're my little girl. I'll whip his ass if he ever mistreats you."

I smile over at him, "I know. But he really is an awfully good man. I don't think I've ever told you just how good. He would never let anything happen to the kids or to me. He would never do anything to hurt me. I know that and I want you to know that. I'd never stay with him if he did."

"I hope not. You always were a smart little thing. I don't think you're dumb enough to stay with a man who didn't treat you good. Come here." He holds out his arms and I get up and sit in his lap. He gives me a big hug.

"Thanks for coming Daddy. I've really missed you."

"I'm glad to do it. I've missed you and the kids too. Even that husband of yours…a little."

"I know. He grows on you." I smile at him.

"Well, all I want is for you to be happy and the kids to be healthy. I like Christian, kiddo. Really I do. I just had to let him know I'm keeping an eye on him." He smiles, "It's my duty as a father to keep my son-in-law in line."

"Thanks. I love you daddy." I give him a big hug.

"Get out of here and go to bed." He throws me out of his lap. "I'll see you in the morning."

I leave him to his TV and beer and go back into our room. Christian is already in the tub relaxing. I walk in and strip down then step over into the tub sinking into his lap. I lay my head on his chest and he wraps me in his arms.

"I talked to daddy. I explained that the TV was wrong about what happened last summer. He knows you didn't do anything wrong," I look up at him.

"But I did. What I did was wrong and I'll take whatever I have coming from your father," he tells me. "He loves you and he wants to make sure I'm being good to you. I completely understand that." He rests his cheek on my head. "I'll kill any fucker who ever thinks about mistreating Grace."

I giggle. "I know. Poor Grace."

"Seriously. I want your father to understand just how much I love you. And I want him to know that I'll never hurt you. I'd die before I ever hurt you again, baby."

"I know. And I think Daddy understands that now. Let's just forget about all of it and enjoy the visit."

Christian kisses my nose and pulls me close.

"I think Teddy really is enjoying Fred."

"Yeah," Christian snorts. "We'll see if he is still enjoying him when your Dad gets ready to leave."

"He is awfully cute," I mention.

"I suppose."

"Do you have to work tomorrow?" I ask him.

"Nope. It's Saturday and I cleared my desk. I knew your dad would be here and I wanted to be able to spend time with everyone." He strokes my hair and kisses my forehead. "Oh, Anastasia. I can't imagine my life without you. It would certainly be a dark and miserable place."

* * *

"Ana." "Ana." I hear Christian whisper.

I open my eyes to pitch blackness, "Hmm. "

"Ana." Christian gently shakes me.

"What?" I force myself over to look at him.

"Do you hear that?" he whispers.

I strain my ears for a moment. "Hear what?"

"That noise. Do you hear it?" he asks.

I listen for a second, "That sort of high pitched noise?"

"Yeah. That's it," he continues to whisper.

I reach for the baby monitors and listen to each one. "It's not the kids. They're sound asleep. It's probably nothing." I lie back down. "It's probably a cat outside or something."

"I'm going to go check it out," he whispers again. "Whatever it is, it's keeping me awake."

"Okay. Be careful." I lie back again. "I'll be here when you get back."

Christian quietly gets out of bed and heads for the door.

"Christian," I loudly whisper.

"What?"

"There's a baseball bat in Teddy's room in case it's a burglar." I whisper again. I have to stifle a giggle.

"Go back to sleep. I'll be back in a minute."

I don't argue with him and let my head hit the pillow again as he disappears through the bedroom door and into the dark hall. My eyelids are so heavy. I wait for Christian to get back. And I wait for Christian to get back. And then I wait for Christian to get back. Where is he? I haven't heard any noises. Well, now I'm getting worried. He should be back by now. I give it a few more seconds. Okay, that's it. I'm going to go find him.

I force myself out of bed and throw on my robe. I quietly open the bedroom door and look down the hall. It's pitch dark except for a faint night light and no husband to be seen anywhere. Humm. Wonder where he is. I walk down the hall a bit and see a light on downstairs. What in the world is going on? I walk down the hall to the stairs and see Christian walking back upstairs. He flips off the light and looks a bit perturbed, but he's in one piece. "Christian. What's going on? Where have you been?" I ask him as he gets to the top of the stairs.

He pulls Fred out from under his arm and grumbles, "Fred had to take a piss." He walks back down to daddy's room and cracks the door and pushes Fred back in the room and closes the door.

He puts his arm around my neck and we walk back in to the bedroom and snuggle back under the covers. I wiggle in next to him and giggle.

"What?" he asks.

"Nothing. You are a good man Christian Grey."

"Not really. Just a man that wants to get some sleep."


	24. Chapter 24

_**Fifty Shades…Full Circle**_

_**Chapter 24**_

**A/N: You've been asking for some drama, so hold on. It's coming up in the next chapter. I always want to give you what you need.**

**And thank you again for taking the time to leave a review. I read everyone and can't wait to check my email to see what you are thinking. I love getting the PMs as well with your thoughts on the story. So get your head in the right place and let's fall back into the world of the Grey's…**

* * *

"So, Dad, are you enjoying your visit?" I ask him as we finish lunch.

"Yeah, Sweetie. So far it's been right enjoyable."

I can hear Christian grumbling on his phone and see him pacing in his three-walled office. "Well how about an air drop?...Okay…..We've done it before, why not now?...Well we can't get the ship in there. We have to find some way to do it, the shit is just sitting around rotting…..Yeah, I know…I just want to get it done….and soon…right, right…..okay, see what you can come up with and let me know. I want to be kept up on any developments…right." Christian ends his call and runs his hand through his hair.

"What's going on with Christian?" Daddy asks me.

"Oh, he has some things going on at work," I try to deflect him.

"I thought he said he took the weekend off?" Dad asks.

"He did. But when you own everything there never really is any time off." I try to explain. "He is responsible for thousands of jobs. He really does take it personally. He will do everything in his power to keep people employed and working. " Watching him pace and rub the back of his neck, I want to put my arms around him. "Right now he is upset because he has a large grain and water shipment that he's trying to get over seas and he can't get a ship there. He's trying to find an alternate way of getting it done, before he loses the entire grain shipment. It's just sitting around rotting right now. "

"Why is he shipping grain and water?" Dad asks.

"Well, remember last night I told you that I never had gone into detail about why Christian is such a good man? "

"Yep." He nods.

"Well, Dad, Christian can't tolerate seeing people going hungry, especially children. He uses his own time, money and resources to ship food, grain and fresh water over to areas where it's needed. He doesn't make any money off of it. He just does it because it's the right thing to do. He's been doing it ever since I've known him and before that."

"You're kiddin'?" Dad says.

"No. He also tries to develop technologies to help third world countries and then just gives it to them. He could make a small fortune selling them, but he won't. He gives it away. That's just the kind of person he is Dad. That's one of the reasons I love him so much."

"Humm. I never knew all that."

"Well please don't mention that I told you. He really doesn't talk about it. It's a private issue for him and he doesn't like for people to know," I tell him. "I think it all stems from when he was very young before Grace and Carrick adopted him. He went hungry a lot. He didn't always have heat in the house or medical care when he needed it. He was neglected a lot and wasn't treated very well. He was a pretty frightened little boy when he was found."

"Really?" Dad asks. "Him? The bazillionaire?"

I nod. "I think that's why he was so driven to become as successful as he is. I don't think he ever wants to be hungry and cold again and he doesn't want his kids or anyone else's to either."

"So, what happened to him? I've never asked, but since you started the subject."

"I've told you some of this. His mother was a young runaway that fell in with some pretty bad company. She died when he as about four of a drug overdose. Before she died, she neglected him and wasn't very protective of him. He went without most of the time and she had some friends that were abusive to him. He suffered a lot Dad. In fact, after his mother died he was left alone with her body for several days. I can't imagine what he must have gone through." I can feel my eyes well up and my voice quivers. "I can't go into everything. He's a very private person, but he's had a pretty rough life. He's worked hard for what we have and he deserves every bit of it."

"Hey, I didn't mean to get you upset, baby girl," he puts his hand on mine. "I really had no idea. You and I have never had time to just sit down and discussed any of this. I won't say a word."

"Thanks Dad." I give him a smile.

"Who would have ever thought?" He has such a pensive look on his face. " I may have a new found respect for my son-in-law. But I'll still kick his ass it he ever mistreats you."

I give him a big smile, "I don't think you'll ever have to worry about that."

"Good, because I think he just might be able to whip _my_ ass," he chuckles.

Christian finally walks back in the family room and sits down with us in one of the huge fireplace chairs.

"Any news?" I ask him.

"No. It's just one big fu…unnecessary mess. That's all. I hate dealing with assho … jerks," he frowns. "There is just no need for all of this." He finally smiles at me. "But don't let it ruin our weekend. It'll work out one way or the other."

"Oh, Christian. Sorry about Fred last night." Daddy apologizes." I have a doggie door at home and he can come and go when he needs to. I forgot that he can't do that here. I really appreciate you taking him out." He grins. "I was dead to the world and didn't hear him whine. I woke up when you shoved him back in my room."

"Don't worry about it Ray. I was glad to do it. At least he knew to go outside and tried to let someone know about it. "

"Yeah. He's a pretty smart little fella'. And he's good company."

"Excuse me, Mrs. Grey?" I hear Myra's voice behind me.

"Yes Myra?" I turn to see her entering the Family room. She gives me a little nod letting me know that she needs me.

"Excuse me. I'll be right back." I tell Dad and Christian.

"What is it?" I ask her.

"You just got a delivery and I knew you were expecting that package from your friend for Mr. Grey. I thought this might be it, since it's so big."

I look over at the large box and it has to be Jose's photos. "Thanks Myra. Can you have one of the guys, Jason or Luke take it up to my bedroom and stash it in the back of my dressing room. I don't want Mr. Grey to see it."

"Yes, ma'am."

"Thank you, Myra."

"Is everything okay?" Dad asks as I walk back in and sit down next to him.

"Yes. Just some household issues. All taken care of," I tell him.

"I still say that Myra's a looker. Seems nice too," he grins.

"I've never noticed," Christian muses. "She's pretty quiet. Hardly know she's here. I guess she does a good job. I've never heard Ana complain."

"Yes. I like her. She's been a good addition. Well, are you still leaving tomorrow or can I persuade you to stay a while longer?" I ask.

"Actually, I was thinking about staying a day or two more. That is if you guys can stand me."

"Oh, daddy. That's great. I want you to stay as long as you want to."

"Yes, Ray. We'd love to have you." Christian lets him know. "Stay as long as you want to."

"Mrs. Grey." I hear Myra again. "Telephone, ma'am."

"Oh, thank you." I walk over to her, "I believe it's Mrs. Grey. I mean Kate Grey."

"Yes, there are several of us. Thanks. I'll get it in the library."

I walk into the half demolished library and grab the phone. "Kate? What's going on?"

"Well how is the visit with Ray going?" she asks.

"Good. So good, he's going to stay a few extra days."

"Hey that's great. I'm glad he's enjoying himself. Look I just called to see about next Saturday."

"What?" I ask. " You and Elliott are coming right?"

"Of course. It's Christian's birthday party. Besides if we didn't Grace would string us up," she laughs.

"I know."

"We're not sure what to get him. Do you have any ideas?" she asks me.

"Gosh, Kate. The man has everything. It's so hard to come up with anything." I tell her.

"Well, we had thought about a donation to something. What do you think about that?"

"I think he would like that. Or a tie." I giggle.

"A tie?" she questions.

"Isn't that what you get a man when you can't think of anything else? I know for a fact he likes ties."

"Yes, but he orders those things from Italy. I wouldn't know where to start to get him a tie," she laughs.

"I was just kidding. A donation to one of his pet charities would be great."

"Oh, I meant to call you. Elliott and I went to see that John Flynn this week."

"You did? What did you think?" I ask her.

"Well, I liked him. I mean for a shrink, he was okay. I guess. I've never been to one before," she laughs.

"Well, I don't want to be nosey, but is everything okay?" I ask.

"Well….I don't know. I mean yes and no," she laughs.

"Kate? Are you okay?" she seems so evasive.

"Well. It seems my husband is not…. functioning properly," she just comes out with it.

"What?"

"Yep. Remember I told you he doesn't want to sleep with me anymore? Well seems he can't."

"What are you talking about?" I ask.

"Oh, come on Steele. You know exactly what I'm talking about. Elliott can't do it."

"Well." I have no idea what to say. "Um. Is it permanent? I mean do they know why?"

"No. He's been to the doctor and had all the tests. It isn't physical. That's why we ended up in the office of John Flynn. At least he isn't cheating on me…Hell, he can't." She laughs and I can hear the tension. She's being flip, but I know it's just Kate's way of covering up for her nervousness.

"Kate. I'm so sorry. Did John say what's causing it?" I ask.

"He thinks it might be pressure at work and lack of sleep. Then when he started distancing himself I made it worse by hounding him all the time. Flynn called it psychogenic impotence. How's that for a big word? He said that most men have an occasional episode at some point in their lives due to stress or lack of sleep. But then not being able to function just causes more anxiety, which results in further sexual problems, hence more anxiety. Sort of a domino effect. Flynn said between the stress, his lack of sleep and then his doctor starting him on those antianxiety pills it just snowballed." I think she is going to cry." Hell. If he had just told me. If we had just talked about it. Flynn said the worst thing he could have done was to stop talking to me. When the relationship started to go bad it just made things more stressful."

"I know, but you're talking now right?" I ask.

"Yes. We've done nothing but talk the past few days."

"Well that's good." I try to sound upbeat for her.

"Ana, I just feel so awful. If I had known, maybe I could have helped him instead of getting angry at him. I just made it worse."

"Well, he should have confided in you. But now he has and you need to move forward and work on it. You can't look back on what you should have done."

"I know. Flynn started him on those "little blue pills". He wouldn't do it until I came with him and we started talking about things. He said the pills would help physically, but Elliott had to work on the stress and we have to work on our relationship together. He also started him on some of that testosterone. Evidently Elliott's was a little low. Hopefully all of this will work."

"Well' I'm glad things are working out. Have you tried the pills yet?"

"Shit. That's the first thing we did after Elliott got them filled." She giggles. " It worked to an extent. I mean physically he was able to….get there. It was just so tense, you know. We were both so nervous about it."

"Kate. I'm so glad. I know it will all work out. You know Elliott loves you more than anything."

"Yes. I know that. I think it will work out. It better. Flynn said he can't stay on these pills forever."

"Well. That's a load off of my mind. I've been worried about you two. Is he staying at home now?"

"Yes. He said he had been going to Escala, just to try to get away from the situation. He said it was just becoming too much for him. But my husband is back in my bed and that is what I call progress."

"Great. Well I guess I need to get back to my husband. Call me if you need anything, Kate."

"I will. I'll see you Saturday if not before."

"Okay. Bye." Wow. I need to make sure Christian gets plenty of sleep. I don't know how he would ever handle something like that.

I walk back toward the family room and look over in the kitchen. What? My father is pouring a cup of coffee and handing it to Myra. Now they're laughing. Good grief, he can be a scallywag when he wants to. Christian will not like that. He does not like getting familiar with the staff. Oh, well. He'll be gone in a day or two.

Christian is still sitting in the chair and he is rubbing his lower lip with his finger and deep in thought. "Is it that bad, Baby?" I ask as I sit down in his lap.

He sighs and gives me a tired smile. "I could be better. Who was that on the phone?"

"Oh, it was Kate. They wanted to know what you want for your birthday."

"I want this shipment delivered before it's useless." He grins at me, "What did you tell her?"

"I'm not telling you. It's your birthday. You just have to wait to see." I bend down kiss his nose.

He pulls me closer into his arms, "What would I do without you? You always make me feel better no matter what is going on."

"It's my job." I hug him and give his a kiss. "I'm the official make Christian Grey happy person. Besides I need to keep you destressed as much as possible."

"Destressed? Why?" he asks.

"Well don't you two look all lovey dovey," Daddy grumbles as he saunters back with his cup of coffee.

"I'll tell you later," I whisper to Christian.

"Did you find some hot coffee?" I ask dad.

"Yep. Myra was kind enough to help me out and find everything," he grunts as he falls back into the sofa. "That Myra's a looker."

"Yes, Dad. So you've mentioned." I'm getting a little tired of this.

* * *

Christian and I are getting ready for bed. Dad is sequestered with Fred and a beer and the kids are down. Christian is once again pounding away on his laptop as he waits for me to come to bed. I've got my gown on and I'm brushing the day out of my hair. "Christian will you please stop that. You promised to take the weekend off."

"I know, but I wasn't expecting this problem with this grain shipment," he says not looking up.

I sit down on my side of the bed next to him," Baby, I worry about you."

He looks at me, "Me? Why?"

"Because you work so hard. You worry so much and you get so little sleep." I try to explain.

"And just what do you think is going to happen to me?" he asks.

"Well, I'm not sure. I just know it can't be good for your health or other things."

"What other things?" he asks.

"Oh, nothing. Forget it." I tell him. I move to get off of the bed and he grabs me pulling me back to him. I giggle as he pulls me down on the bed and looms over me. He gives me a quick kiss and then sits up and pulls me against him.

"Now. Mrs. Grey. Just what perchance do you think is going to happen to me? Come on fess up," he smiles at me.

"Well. I talked to Kate today," I start.

"Aaah. I see. I think I understand now. She talked to you about Elliott."

"Yes. She did. And I started thinking about you and how hard you work and how much stress you're under…."

"And you think I'll lose it. Is that right?"

"Well, I'm just taking precautions."

"Well, I'm not my brother. Don't concern yourself. I doubt there will ever be a time that I can't fuck you senseless woman."

"I'm not worried about me. I'm worried about you." I look up at him trying not to smile. " You could have a heart attack or stroke or something."

He nods, "Yes I could. I could also be run over by a bus or be struck by a meteor or fall down a manhole. But none of that is likely, baby."

"I just can't bear the thought of ever having to be without you, Christian." I snuggle in next to him.

"I know. Me either. But stop dwelling on it. Don't worry about things that haven't happened."

"Well, that's what you do. Worry."

"Baby I never worry. I look at things from all angles and research options, but I never worry."

"Okay. Well could you ease off so much of the research, a little. I want you around for a long time."

He snorts, "I'll give it a try. Hey, what's with your Dad and Myra?"

"Heck if I know. He just keeps telling me, '_That Myra's a looker, he, he, he. '_ "I imitate him.

"Well tell him to lay off the staff. That's all I need is for Myra to complain that your Dad's hitting on her."

"Oh, Christian. Daddy's not hitting on her. Get a grip."

"Well, what would you call it?" he asks.

"He just enjoys pretty women," I reassure him.

"Myra?!"

"Remember, beauty is in the eye of the beholder, " I tell him shaking my hairbrush at him.

"Well that beholder needs his eyes checked," Christian chuckles.

"I wish Daddy would find someone. He deserves to be happy and have someone look after him." I snuggle closer. "Someone besides Fred. He's lived alone since I left for college."

"That's a while ago. Just how long did you live with Ray anyway?" Christian asks.

"Oh, I went to live with him shortly after Mom married Steve. So that would be my early teens I guess. Then I left when I was what, eighteen and started at WSU."

"You've never told me, why did you leave your Mom and go live with Ray? He wasn't your biological father."

"I know, but he was the only father I knew. Mom was always so into her husbands. I always seemed to fall somewhere behind them in her list of priorities. Not that she didn't love me. She does. She is just one of those women who needs a husband."

"So what happened? Why did you leave and go live with Ray?" he asks.

"There was always something that made me uncomfortable about Steve. It wasn't until I went to Savannah last year that Mom told me he was abusive to her." I can feel Christian hold me a little tighter. "That's why they divorced so quickly."

"Was it bad? Did you ever see any of it?" he asks almost frantically.

"No. I never saw him touch her, but there was just something about him. He made me so uncomfortable. He had a quick temper and he…"

"He what, baby?" he asks.

"He just made me uncomfortable. He was always looking at me in a weird way. A couple of times I would wake up at night and he would be in my room. He always just said he was checking on me. And he was always touching me; you know rubbing my back or stroking my hair. He gave me the creeps. I hated to be left alone with him," I shiver.

"Anastasia. Did that man ever touch you?" I can feel him tense next to me.

"No. Not really." I shake my head.

"Not really?" he sits up and looks at me. "What the fuck do you mean not really? I'll kill that fucker if touched you."

"No. No. Christian just calm down," I plead with him. "I remember once I was in the kitchen and Mom was still at work. He came in the kitchen and started talking to me. He kept moving closer and closer until he was rubbing up against me. It scared me a little."

"A little?" he asks me.

"Okay. It scared me a lot. I tried to move away and he grabbed me by the shoulders. I was shaking and almost in tears when Mom walked in. He let me go and moved away and started talking to Mom like nothing was going on. I was on a plane going to live with Ray by the end of the week."

"I'll have the mother fucking piece of shit torn to shreds. He'll regret the day he ever laid a hand on you." He pulls me close and wraps me tightly in his arms.

"Well, you'll have a hard time doing that since he's been dead for the last four years," I tell him.

"Good. Someone saved me the trouble," he grumbles.

"Anastasia, why didn't you ever tell me about this?" he cups my face in his hands and stares into my eyes.

"Because it's really nothing . I don't think I ever put it together until just now. I think that's why I was so upset over Mrs. Robinson. I know how scared I was. I can't even imagine how you must have felt."

"That was different."

"And just how was it different?" I ask him.

"I was a big strapping boy and I could defend myself. I could have broken Elena in half if I had wanted to. You couldn't protect yourself. He took advantage of you."

"Well, Elena took advantage of you. The only difference is she used your fifteen year old male hormones instead of brute force," I insist.

"Yeah. I guess she did," he has a far- away look in his eyes." Let's not go there. It's all over now and we're safe and have each other. Besides I can't bear to think of anyone ever hurting you. No one touches you, ever, Anastasia."

"I feel the same way about you. That's why I hated her so much." I snuggle in tighter against him. "Not to change the subject, but where did you get that collar that you gave me the other night?"

"What, the one that says you belong to me?" he looks down at me and grins.

"Uh huh. I'm sure you didn't pick it up at the local adult toy shop."

He laughs, "Yeah. They had a rack of them. I just looked until I found one with my name on it."

I give him a smack on his arm. "No seriously. Where did you get it?"

"I had it made for you. Did you like it?"

"Yes, very much. It's beautiful. Who in the world did you get to make something like that?"

"I have a jeweler that makes custom pieces for me. He made your pearl and diamond necklace."

"But won't he say anything about making something so… I don't know, so.."

"So naughty?" he helps me out.

"Yeah. It's not your everyday piece of jewelry."

"I pay him enough that he would never open his mouth. Not if he wants to keep my business, which is considerable."

"Have you used him long. I mean did he make things for other.."

He pulls me tighter and kisses my head, "The first piece he ever made for me was your engagement ring."

"Okay. I feel better." I grin up at him. "You know it really is a beautiful piece. It's a shame I can't wear it out in public."

"Why can't you wear it out?" he gives me a wicked grin.

"Get a grip, Grey. It's a filigree collar. Why did you have it made?" I ask him.

"Because I wanted you to wear a collar. It just seemed sexy, me claiming you like that. But I didn't like the idea of you just wearing one of those common leather things that you can pick up at an adult book store. You are special and I wanted it to be special. You deserve fine things, Anastasia and I want you to have them." He strokes my cheek with his thumb.

"I don't know what it's made of, but it looks very expensive."

"It was fairly pricey." He nods. "But I wanted you to have it. Maybe you need something that you can wear in public that says you belong to me. Fuck that would be really hot. Every time I looked over at you I could see it and know that you are mine."

"Christian. You already have that." I hold up my hand. "It's called a wedding ring. Isn't that hot enough? I know it works for me."

Christian takes me in his arms and pushes me back on the bed. Hovering over me, he locks eyes with mine, "It's the sexiest fucking piece of jewelry I've ever given you. Come here Mrs. Grey."


	25. Chapter 25

_**Fifty Shades…Full Circle**_

_**Chapter 25**_

**A/N: Since tomorrow is Thanksgiving, here in the States, I wanted to post early today before I begin to dive knee deep into pie baking. Thank you again so very much for taking the time to leave a review. I am thankful for each and every one of you out there.**

* * *

Breakfast is finished and everyone is down stairs getting into something. I think they are outside. Daddy wanted to take Fred down to the water and see if he could swim, since he's part Lab, supposedly. Who knows what Fred is? Cute mainly. I'm so glad he decided to stay the entire week. I'm going to hate to see him go. I want to see what those pictures look like. Looking out the window I check to make sure everyone is accounted for. Yep there they all are. I guess it's safe to open this box. I get the scissors and cut through the packing tape and open the cardboard shipping container. Then I remove all of the bubble wrap and see three wrapped pictures. Three? Jose was supposed to take pictures of the kids. I struggle to pull them out. Taking the brown paper wrapping off the first one, I just want to cry. It's just so beautiful. There's my Grace in her pink overalls. Well the photos are black and white, but I know they're pink. It's a close up of her face and she's wearing the cutest grin. Her hair is windblown and she just looks so carefree and happy. I wish she could always be this way.

Now let me see what this next one is. I strip away the paper. It's my sweet Teddy. I remember when this was taken. He was playing ball and he was waiting to swing at the ball. He has a determined little look on his face, trying to concentrate on the ball. I can almost see the sweat on his little brow. Why can't they stay little? I don't want them to grow up and have to deal with all the shit out there. I want them to stay with me and Christian and let us protect them.

Oh, well. I'm anxious to see what this third one is. I strip away the paper on the final picture. It brings tears to my eyes. I don't know when Jose took this. It's got all of us in there. It's Teddy, Grace, Christian and me. He must have taken it after Christian got home. We are down by the water and the sun is getting low. Christian is carrying Grace in one arm and has his other around me. Teddy is throwing something out into the water, probably a rock or a stick. How does Jose do this? He always knows just the instant to freeze in time. This is priceless. I'd better get them back in the box before Christian comes up here. After quickly getting them wrapped up and back in the box, I seal it and then shove it in behind my clothes in the closet. Christian isn't the nosey type. He won't go looking for anything, but he'd look in it if he saw it.

I need to get back down stairs. Daddy is leaving today and I want to spend as much time with him as I can. I really hate to see him go. I know he says he's fine living in his house, but I wish he would move here with us. Something could happen to him and he'd be all alone. I hate to think about him being all by himself.

As I hit the bottom step of the staircase I can hear the crew coming back in the house. Christian has Grace and Teddy is carrying Fred who is sopping wet and wrapped in a towel. Dad has stopped in the kitchen for another cup of coffee.

"Well how did Fred do?" I ask them.

"He did good, Mom." Teddy is all smiles. "He can swim like a fish."

"You look like you've been swimming yourself," his pants are soaked and he is barefooted. "And where are your shoes?"

"Uhh. I guess I left them outside. I'm sorry." He looks sheepish. "I'll go back out and get them."

"Wait, Ted I got them for you." Christian holds up his hand and he has Teddy's shoes hanging from his fingers. "Here you can take them to your room."

"Well, I'd better go on up and get my stuff together," Dad looks almost like he doesn't want to leave.

"Are you sure you have to leave Daddy?" I move over and wrap my arm around him.

"Yep. I need to get back and check on the house and Fred is going to be spoiled rotten if I don't get him out of here." Poor Teddy looks like he wants to cry at the thought of Fred leaving.

Daddy turns to go upstairs and Christian yells after him, "Ray. Yell at me when you get packed and I'll get your things down to the car for you."

"Thank you, Christian."

My father gets his things packed and Christian helps him get his car packed. Myra fixes him a coffee for the road and brings it out to him. "Goodbye Mr. Steele. I was nice meeting you." She gives him a nice smile as she walks back to the house.

"That Myra..."

"I know Dad. That Myra's a looker." I tell him and laugh.

"Well she's a nice lady too," he grins.

"I'm glad she was nice to you."

Teddy is still holding Fred. "Well Ted, I hate to do it, but I guess I need to put Fred in the car."

Teddy reluctantly hands over the puppy and I can see his little chin tremble. He puts his little arms around me and buries head in my waist. "Hey, baby, Fred will come to visit again."

"I know," he says as he wipes away his tears. I give my dad a hug and Christian gives him one too. Then he gets in his car and he and Fred disappear down the drive. Teddy bursts into full blown sobs.

"What is it baby?" I kneel down to hug him.

"I just miss Fred," he tells me through his little sobs.

"Oh, baby. You really got attached to Fred didn't you?" This is breaking my heart.

"Uh huh. I wish he d d didn't have t t to g g o," he stutters through his tears.

Bending down and picking him up Christian puts him on his shoulder like he was still small, as Teddy puts his legs around his dad's waist and his arms around Christian's neck and sobs into his shoulder. "Hey, Sport, Fred will come back to visit. Don't cry buddy." Christian rubs his back as we walk back to the house.

"I know, daddy. I just miss him so much. He was my friend." We walk into the house and into the family room sitting down on the sofa. Grace is playing with her doll. Daddy and Fred leaving hasn't seemed to have any effect on her. Christian is still holding Teddy like he was still his baby and Ted is curled up in his lap. Christian wipes away some of his tears. "It's okay buddy. Maybe we can get you a dog of your own. Would you like that?"

Teddy perks up a little, "Uh huh. I would. But I would still miss Fred."

"Well maybe having a dog of your own would help. We can talk about it. Having a dog is a big responsibility. It takes a lot of time to take care of him."

"I know. I took care of Fred. " He seems to perk up a little.

"Well, you think about it and we'll look into it," Christian hugs Teddy and kisses his head.

"Okay, dad." He sniffles as he wipes his tears. "Dad?"

"Yeah, buddy?"

"I thought about it and I want a dog."

Christian snorts and chuckles, "Maybe we need to think about it a little longer. And think about what kind of dog you want. Big, small, fuzzy, boy, girl. There are tons of dogs out there that need a home."

"We got a good home for a dog," he smiles at Christian wiping the tears from his little face.

"Yes we do son. We've got an awfully good home for a dog." Crisis averted for now.

* * *

"Well, how do you feel Birthday Boy? Do you feel ancient? " I whisper to my husband as I wrap my arms around him in the shower.

"Ancient," he snorts. " I'll feel better once we get this dinner over with tonight. I hate all the fuss."

"I'm looking forward to seeing Mia and Ethan. They got back from Paris this week. I'm anxious to see how the honeymoon went." I kiss his wet back as we stand under the warm water falling from the ceiling. Sliding my hand around his waist and down I can see that my husband is in his usual state of readiness. "You don't feel ancient to me."

He gasps as I run my hand over his erection. "Careful. I may be ancient, but the equipment still works. Don't start anything you can't finish."

"I think I can finish. Don't I always?" I continue to trail kisses over his soft back and slide my hand up and down his soapy member.

"Seriously, baby. AHH." His breathing is hitching," I'm not sure we have time….time…for this….. Oh fuck it. We'll be late." He turns and takes me in his arms soap, water and all and seals my mouth with his. My hands glide through the slick lather and I squeeze his but cheeks in my hands.

"Don't you want a little pre-party present?" I ask him.

"I'm always up for a present," he says through a wicked grin as his hands slide up and down my soapy body.

"You're just always up period, Mr. Grey." I mumble as I trail kisses down his chest, stopping to nip his nipples with my teeth. I continue to slide my hand up and down his birthday arousal as he moans and his eyes glaze over. I continue until I feel his arms tighten around me as he melts into me and spills into my hand.

"Fuck." he gasps catching his breath. "That was fun."

"We'll get more elaborate later," I tell him.

He gives me a quick kiss," I can't wait to see you in cuffs. Nothing but cuffs." He gives me his ' I intend to fuck you' grin.

"I think we can arrange that Birthday Boy. Now let's get dressed and get this birthday party on the road."

Christian gets a pained look on his face for a second.

"Sweetie, what is it?" I ask him.

"Oh, it's just indigestion. I think I need to lay off the coffee a little. I've been drinking way too much."

"Are you sure? Is there anything I can do?" Christian rarely gets indigestion.

"Do we have anything for indigestion?"

"I think so. I'll get it for you when we get out of the shower."

"Good. I need to be able to eat Mom's birthday dinner tonight."

"You've been having indigestion a lot lately. I still think you've been worrying too much. It's probably stress." I wish I could get him to slow down.

"Anastasia, stop with the stress stuff. I'm not an old man. It's just too much coffee," he admonishes me as he rinses the soap out of his hair.

Stepping out of the shower I dry off and go to the medicine cabinet and get him some antacids and a longer acting acid blocker. "Here. Take these." I hand him the tablets and fill a glass with water for him.

He downs the pills, "Thanks babe. That should do the trick."

"I'm keeping my eye on you. I want to see that stress level come down."

"Yes, ma'am," he gives me a quick kiss. "Now if you could just get that grain delivered for me, that would help more than anything."

Getting myself dressed I decide to go a bit casual, since it's just a family get together. I get my hair back in a loose ponytail with tendrils around my face. I'm wearing a long peasant skirt with an off the shoulder loose top and have it belted with a loose leather belt that hangs at my hips. I slide into some leather sandals and very large gold hoops in my ears. I love flats, but they make me look so short next to Christian. He's so tall and lean. I think he likes me to look small for some reason.

Looking over Christian is tucking a white cotton shirt into his jeans and rolling the sleeves up a turn or two. He slides into his loafers as he fastens his watch to his wrist. His hair is almost dry, but not quite. He looks so clean and….well, hot. Damn, that man! I guess I can wait until we get home.

"Sweetheart, I'm going to go get Grace dressed, can you check on Ted for me?" I ask him.

"Got it covered," he tells me.

"I've already given Grace her bath so I just need to get her dressed. When I find her in her room she is sitting on the floor 'reading' a book in her underwear. "Come on sweetie, let's get dressed so we can go to Grandma Grace's. What do you want to wear?" Grace runs to her closet as I'm thumbing through her clothes.

"That." She points to a dress hanging in her closet.

"This?" I ask her.

"Uh huh." She nods.

"Baby that the dress you wore to Aunt Mia's wedding. You don't want to wear that."

"Uh huh. Yeth," she nods and insists.

"Sweetie pick something else. That's too fancy. It's silk and you don't want to ruin it."

She nods again,"Yeth I do. I weaw it, Mama."

"Grace we are going to be late, honey. Please pick something else."

"I weaw that one," she points her finger at the dress and gets a determined pout on her face.

"I'm not telling you again. Pick something else or I'll pick it for you," I try to be firm.

"NO! I weaw that," she insists.

I shake my head at her and pull out a sear sucker sundress and her sandals. Here it comes. I can hear her begin to tear up. It would be easier to let her wear the wedding dress, but I've said no and I need to stick by my decision. I can't give in to her all the time.

"Come here, baby." I sit on her bed and pull her over to me as I pull the dress on over her head. Her face is scarlet and her cheeks are wet with her temper fit tears. I get the back buttoned up and sit her on the bed as I put her little white socks on. As I'm trying to get her feet into her sandals, Christian stops by her room with Teddy.

"What is going on in here?" he asks, sounding irritated.

"Grace doesn't like my wardrobe choice for her," I explain.

"Well what does she want to wear?" he asks.

"The dress she wore to Mia's wedding."

"Well, let her wear it. Anything to get her to stop." I lock eyes with his and glare at him. "Or maybe she could just wear what she has on. It looks nice."

"No daddy. Don't want to weaw dis." She is crying to the point of slobbering now.

"Grace. Hush and let your mother get you dressed. We don't have time for this," he fusses at her.

"No daddy. I not hush," she shakes her head at him and thrusts out her lower lip.

Well shit. Christian freezes and looks over at her, "What did you say, young lady?" he asks her.

"I thaid NO!" she spits out and glares at Christian and Christian glares right back at her. Christian almost looks stunned. I'm not sure anyone has ever said no to him.

"Grace, you don't ever tell me or your mother, no. Do you understand me?"

"NO!" says his defiant little princess standing her ground. She's not giving an inch to her CEO father and Christian looks stunned.

"Young lady, do you want a spanking? Because I'll stop right now and give you one," he's dug in as deep as she is. Now I wish I had just let her wear the fucking dress.

Grace finally looks down and sniffles, "No." she shakes her head.

"That's better. Now get your fuc….your shoes on and let's go." Christian is still in stern mode.

"I think you should spank her, dad," Teddy offers as he stands next to Christian.

"Hush Teddy," Christian tells him.

"I'm just sayin', Dad."

"Theodore. Just hush and go downstairs." Teddy turns and stomps down the hall.

I finish getting her dressed and her hair brushed. She is still sniffling and I get a washcloth and wipe her face. "Are you finished yet?" Christian asks.

"God I hope so," I tell him as I stand up and set Grace on the floor.

Bending down Christian picks his daughter up in his arms and we head downstairs to leave.

Grace buries her head in Christian's shoulder and I see him rub her back and give her a kiss.

"You're a softie," I shake my head as we walk down the stairs.

"What?" he asks.

"Hugging and kissing her like that."

"Well, I hug and kiss you after I threaten to spank you," he grins.

"Ohhhh. That's sooo different, Mr. Grey." I roll my eyes at him as we get the kids in the back seat and I slide in the front of the A8.

We pull up at Christian's parent's home and the kids have been picking at each other the entire drive over. Christian is on his last nerve and I'm not far from it. Christian parks the car and looks at the kids in the rear view mirror.

"Okay. That's just enough. I'm tired of listening to the two of you bicker. You're going to hush and walk into that house and behave yourselves. If I have to speak to either one of you again, you'll have to deal with me when we get home. Do you hear me?"

"Yes, sir." Teddy mumbles.

"Uh huh." Grace says.

"What did you say Grace?" he asks.

"I thaid, uh huh, daddy," she shouts at him. He glares at her. "Yesth thur," she corrects herself.

"That's better. Now everyone put on a damn smile and let's go in the house." Christian opens his car door and we get the kids out of the car and up to the front door where Grace and Carrick are waiting for us.

"Goodness what in the world took you so long to get out of the car?" Grace asks as Christian kisses her cheek.

"Hello mother. Just some last minute instructions," he grumbles.

"I understand sweetheart. Parenthood is a wonderful thing, " she smiles at him. "Happy Birthday sweetheart."

She gives me a big hug and a kiss, "Hello, Dear."

"Hi Grace." I give out a big sigh as we pass through the door.

Carrick offers us a drink and we both choose a Hendrick's and tonic and take a seat in the family room with the rest of the clan.

I look over at Christian and he's got a sour look on his face again, "Sweetheart are you okay?" I ask him.

"Yeah. My stomach is just bothering me again. Can you see if mom has anything for it?" he asks me.

"Sure. I'll go see." I walk to the kitchen and Grace is giving instructions to Louise.

"Grace. I hate to interrupt, but Christian is having a bout of indigestion. Do you have anything for it?" I ask her.

"Indigestion? Goodness. He never has indigestion."

"I know. He says he's been drinking too much coffee. But personally, I think it's stress." I tell her. "He wants to know if you have anything for it."

"Well of course. Let me get it for you." She gets some tablets from the cabinet and hands them to me. "Give him these. If they don't help, tell him to come talk to me."

Walking back to the den Mia and Ethan are walking in the front door. They look wonderful, so rested and happy.

We get through dinner and hear about the honeymoon. They don't seem to even know that there are other people in the room; they are so into each other. And Kate and Elliott look much more like their old selves again; can't keep their hands off of each other. Grace and Carrick sure raised kids with healthy sexual appetites.

Christian is a bit more relaxed. He is laughing and opening his gifts. I know he hates being the center of attention, but he knows how much his family loves him and he accepts it. I can't wait to get home and give him the gifts from the kids and me. And his chocolate cake. Always his chocolate cake.

Finally Christian gathers his gifts and we round up our kids to go back home. Teddy and Grace are actually behaving themselves in the back as we make the drive back to the house.  
It's dark and quiet in the car with only the occasional headlight flash from the oncoming cars to light his face. I could almost fall asleep, but our night isn't over yet. "Mia and Ethan looked good." I tell him as I reach over for his hand.

"Yeah. I guess a couple of weeks in Paris will do that for you," he snorts.

"Mia said she spent most of the time with her head in the toilet. Poor thing. I felt so sorry for her. I hate for her to remember her honeymoon like that." I look over at Christian and he looks so handsome in the shadows. He gives my hand a squeeze and puts it to his lips softly kissing it.

"I want us to go back to the Côte d'Azur sometime. How about for our tenth? We could rent the yacht again and spend a few weeks just the two of us."

"What do we do about them?" I ask as I nod to the kids.

"Well, I'm sure Mom would keep them for us."

"We'll see. It's very tempting. We did have a good time didn't we?" I reminisce.

"The absolute best. Maybe next time you'll leave your top on." He gives me a grin and a wink.

"Lord, what was I thinking? I must have been out of my mind." I shake my head.

Christian pulls down the drive and into the garage. We get the kids out of the car and head into the house. "I think they may be too sleepy for cake," I mention as we walk into the kitchen.

"I'm not too sleepy for cake," Teddy hollers with his little radar ears.

"Well, you don't miss a thing do you?" I ask him. I really hate to give them cake this late but it's Christian's birthday. Christian and Teddy both look forward to that chocolate cake.

We get the kids to the table and I get milk all around for us, before bringing the cake in. Teddy likes to turn the lights out so the candles really show up. He does like a bit of drama. As I bring the cake in the kids sing Happy Birthday and Grace and Teddy blow out the candles for their dad. Christian opens his cards. The kids made theirs and I do believe he may shed a few tears when he reads the crayon embellished sentiments. Teddy's has drawn a dog on his and Grace has drawn herself and her dad. Somehow Teddy and I got left out of the family unit on that one. After we finish we go back to the family room for a bit. I had Taylor bring the pictures down and set them in the family room while we were gone. Christian beams when he spies the brightly wrapped box all tied up with a bow.

Grace runs over to the big box and tries to lift it, "Ope it daddy!"

Christian jumps to help her to keep the big box from falling over on her. "Wait a minute sweetie. Let daddy help you. "

Grace is grabbing at the bow and clawing at the paper like it was hers. At her age she assumes all presents belong to her. "Son come help us unwrap this," Christian says to Teddy who looks like he is having a difficult time restraining himself. Sitting back on the sofa I relish watching my family demolish the wrapping finally getting down to the shipping box.

Christian pops open the box and pulls the first frame out stripping the bubble wrap away, he sets the likeness of his son on the floor stepping back to look at it. Not uttering a word he stares at the huge framed piece of work . He barely shakes his head and I can see his jaw tense as he tries to contain his emotion. "Well, now I see why Jose came for a visit."

"That's me Dad!" Teddy beams.

"Yes. It certainly is son," Christian says as he pulls Teddy over and hugs him. "Well, let's see what else we have in here. Christian removes the second frame from the box and sets it beside the first one and stands back to take in the sight of his daughter's larger than life, smiling face. Again I see the emotion well in him as he takes in a deep breath and sighs. "Well. I can't imagine what the next one is," he says as he pulls it from the box and sets it next to the previous two images. He pulls away the wrapping and stares at the representation of his family walking at the water's edge of our home.

"Well, thank you everyone. I've never received anything that I love this much," he says in a husky almost inaudible voice, "Except for maybe a certain glider model." He returns to sit with me on the sofa, pulling me to him as he sits down and burying his head in my neck. "Thank you, sweetheart. You have no idea how much those mean to me."

"I'm glad you like them, baby," I hug him back. He pulls back to look at me and I see moisture glistening around his eyes. "He gives me a sweet kiss and then wipes his eyes with the heels of his palms. "

"Christian are you okay? I didn't mean for these to upset you."

He shakes his head and I can hear his voice tremble, "I just never thought I'd ever be this happy. I never thought that I'd deserve this much."

I wrap him in my arms like he was a child and hold him, "Christian Grey you are the best thing that ever happened to us. We all love you so much."

Not to be left out, Grace flings herself on us, "Yeah , Daddy. We wuv you."

Theodore joins the love fest and Christian starts to beam as he grabs his kids and it's kisses all around for everyone.

* * *

"Well, Birthday Boy, are you ready for the rest of your present?" I ask my husband as I stroll toward the bed, nude, white satin panties dangling from my finger.

A grin breaks out across his face as he crawls across the bed and grabs me pulling me down on to the mattress. Hovering over me I give him a giggle, "Wait, don't you want me to put these on and assume the position?"

He stares into my eyes, "God I'll never get tired of hearing that sound. And no I want you now. We'll pretend you were in the position. Except…" he jumps up and goes to his dressing room. I can hear him unlock _The Cabinet _and he returns with a wicked grin and hand cuffs. "We need these." He crawls on the bed on his knees. "Sit up Anastasia," he tells me. Already I can hear the change in his voice; it has that monotone play room authority in it. Without hesitation I fall into my role and cast my eyes down as I quickly obey.

"Face down on the bed and your arms above your head." I turn over face down on the bed. Doing as I am told I stretch my arms out in front of me. Christian snaps the metal around one wrist and then pulling the chain through the heavy wooden slat in the headboard , he clicks the other cuff around my other wrist binding my hands together and securing me to our bed.

My arousal begins to increase as I feel him spread my legs and move between them. He grabs my hips pulling me up on my knees and leans me up on my elbows. "Come on, baby. Up on your knees. I want to see your ass. " He gently rubs his hands over my butt cheeks. "And such a soft, beautiful ass it is," he murmurs against my skin as he kisses and strokes my round cheeks. "All it needs is a little color." Without warning I feel a sting and hear his hand strike my but cheek. Not being prepared for the sudden assault, I gasp.

"There, there," I can hear him comfort me as he kisses the spot he has just struck. As his lips caress my stinging skin, I suddenly feel the sharp bite of his palm on my other butt cheek. I jump at the abrupt contact. Again his soft lips trace over my tingling skin leaving gentle kisses. "Mmm. I love your skin. It's always so fucking soft, baby." I hear and feel the next strike of his palm against me. I can't help but let out a small, "Ooooww."

"Shhh. Be still," he whispers as I feel his hand slide between my thighs and stroke from front to back. "God, you're so ready." He whispers against my stinging flesh. I want to melt as his fingers enter me. "I'm not going to let you come now. I'm going to claim my birthday fuck first. Then I'll take care of you." He continues and I'm so aroused that I am almost there. I want to come against his hand and I grind myself against him. "That's it. I like to watch you move like that baby," he growls as he tortures me. His hand is moving faster and harder and I'm panting to try to catch my breath. I begin to feel the muscles in my body tense and my head is beginning to fog as I begin to feel the precursor to my orgasm.

"No. Not yet I told you," Christian grumbles as he abruptly removes his hand from me. Just as suddenly I feel all of him enter. I can't contain the small whimper that escapes from me. Christian grinds his pelvis against me giving me time to adjust to him. He begins to move in and out with fast miniscule strokes never really leaving and never really entering me. Then as quickly as he entered, he pulls out slamming back in again. He begins to move with increased vigor; pulling my hips back to meet him every time he pushes into me. I can hear his breathing become ragged as he races to his climax. Over and over, relentless without any semblance of tenderness he forces his way in and each push jolts me forward on the bed. "Don't you come, Anastasia. This is mine. It's all for me," he spits out the words as he wildly rides me.

"No sir. I won't," I'm able to get out between thrusts.

"I'm going to come. Are you ready?" he sputters.

"Yes sir. Please."

I can feel him as he enters with one last, hard, deep penetration. His body stills as he almost screams," Oh, Fuck! Damn!" He folds his body over me as I can feel him tremble with his birthday orgasm still pumping his release. His flesh is wringing with sweat and I can hear him gasping as he pulls out and falls on the bed next to me. "FUCK" he gasps. "SHIIIT."

What? I look over to see Christian on his back clutching his chest and gasping. The look on his face is not one of ecstasy and it causes my blood to run cold. "CHRISTIAN?" I scream. "CHRISTIAN. What's wrong? Are you okay?" He shakes his head and the look on his face is undeniably one of pain. I pull at my cuffs wanting to grab him. I can't get loose and now I'm panicking. I pull and strain against the cuffs, but I can't break the cold metal that binds me to the bed. "Christian. Baby. Where is the key? Please, baby. I can't get loose." I begin to cry and tug violently realizing the predicament we are in. "Christian! Baby, hold on. Please don't leave me. I'll get us out of this. Please. I love you Christian!"

** ...…..Happy Thanksgiving 'Yall**


	26. Chapter 26

_**Fifty Shades…Full Circle**_

_**Chapter 26**_

_**A/N: Thank you so much for all of the wonderful comments. I'm posting early as a thank you.**_

* * *

"CHRISTIAN! CHRISTIAN! Please God help me," I beg as I pull and strain against my bonds. Please don't let Christian die. Please help me. Please. I am able to sit up and look over at Christian who is pale as a ghost and wringing wet. His breathing is shallow and rapid and he continues to clutch at his chest.

What can I do? "Baby I can't get to you." We turned the phones off, so I can't use the voice recognition to call for help. "I'll think of something. Please hang on. I'll figure something out." I'm trying to hold myself together as I watch him writhing in pain and gasping for air. I search my brain trying to figure out a way out of our predicament. "Sweetheart, you're going to be okay. I promise, you'll be okay." I keep thinking if I pull hard enough I can break my metal bonds on the heavy wooden slat on the bed. Maybe if I can give it one good hard yank I can break the wood. I grit my teeth and quickly pull hard and fast. I feel the searing pain shoot up my arm and realize the only thing I've broken is my wrist. I have an overwhelming need to vomit, but am able to try to calm myself. Still small beads of sweat begin to form over my body and drip from my forehead.

"Christian! Oh fuck Christian." I let my head fall back and begin to sob. "I don't know what to do. I don't know what to do, baby."

I'm yanked out of my misery by a light knock at our door, "Mommy? Mommy are you okay?" I can hear the little voice of my son. The thought of him seeing us like this makes me sick. Luckily I remember that our door is locked.

"Teddy? Is that you Teddy?" I yell.

"Yes Mommy. I can't get in. Are you and Dad okay?"

"Yes, Baby." I try to calm myself. "Sweetie, listen very carefully to Mommy, okay?"

"Yes, ma'am."

"I need for you to go to the house phone and press the button for Gail. When she or Taylor answers, I want you to tell them to come to Mommy and Daddy's bedroom very quickly. But first tell her to dial 911. Can you remember that Sweetie?"

"Yes ma'am. Are you okay?"

"It's okay, baby. I just can't get to the door. Please hurry Teddy. Come let me know when you've done it okay?"

"Yes, ma'am."

"Christian, baby, hold on. We're getting you help. Please baby please. I love you so much."

I watch my husband clutch his chest and gasp for air and wait for what seems like hours and finally hear Teddy at the door,"Mommy?"

"Yes, sweetie?" I try to answer calmly.

"Mommy, Gail said she and Taylor are coming." Thank God. His little voice sounds so terrified.

"Thank you baby. Don't be scared. Everything is fine and you did a good job. Is Grace still asleep?" I ask trying to keep him calm with conversation.

"I think so. Want me to check on her?" he asks through the door.

"Yes. That would be good. If she's still asleep, please don't wake her up. Just let her sleep." Maybe keeping him busy will keep him from being upset.

"Okay. I'll go see."

"Christian, Gail and Taylor are on the way."

"S..Sorry," he gasps as he looks over at me and closes his eyes.

"Christian! Wake up. Don't you go to sleep. If you die after all of this, I'll kill you," I spit at him through my tears.

I can see a faint smile break through his grimace.

I can finally hear the turmoil outside our bedroom as someone grabs the door knob.

"Ana! Ana! Are you and Mr. Grey alright?" I hear Gail panic through the closed door.

"No Gail. I can't get to the door," I yell back.

"I'll get us in." I hear Taylor's panicked voice. I've never heard him scared before.

I am able to grab a pillow with my elbows and pull it up in front of me to attain a modicum of modesty.

"Gail, please keep Teddy out," I yell as I hear Taylor's foot come down against the door. It doesn't budge. Damn this well- built house. Again I hear Taylor strike the door and this time I can hear the wood give a little.

"Almost there Ana," I hear Taylor bellow. His foot hits against the secured door again, "SHIT!" I hear him growl. He finally breaks through with one more hard kick and the wooden door frame splinters away as the door comes off of its hinges. I recognize the faint sound of a siren as he and Gail run into the room. Gail quickly grabs the duvet and pulls it around me. If I weren't so scared I'd be mortified. Well I'll have time to be humiliated later. Right now I need to get to my husband. "Taylor, I think he's having a heart attack. Help him, please. Please help him."

"An ambulance is on the way, Ana," he assures me as he covers Christian with a robe.

I show the cuffs to Gail, "Gail help me. I can't get loose." I am in tears.

She looks down in disbelief, "Where's the key?"

"It might be on the chest in Christian's dressing room. Check there." I nod toward the door to his closet.

Jason is attending to Christian,"Mr. Grey….. Mr. Grey! …Can you hear me Mr. Grey?" I see Teddy at our bedroom door looking terrified. "Baby. Everything is okay. Go back to your room. You did a good job." I tell him as I make sure the pillow is covering my wrist jewelry.

"No Mommy. Is daddy sick?" he asks.

"Just a little, baby. But he's going to be fine. I need you to go to your room, Teddy. Now."

"But, Mom…"

"Now Teddy. Now." I can see him pout as he turns to head back to his room. Gail returns panicked, "Ana. I can't find the key."

"SHIT! I have no idea where Christian put it. I've got to get lose." I'm in a panic.

"JASON." Gail looks over at Taylor who is trying to comfort Christian and making sure he is covered.

Jason Taylor sees the situation and he reaches over to inspect my hand cuffs. He moves away from Christian, "Get back Gail." He orders his wife. "Look out Ana," he warns as he swiftly kicks the headboard. It falls lose from the bed and the part of the bed I'm sitting on, abruptly falls to the floor and the lamp on the nightstand falls over and shatters. Jason continues to kick at it until the wooden slat is broken. "Ahh. Shit." I grimace as I pull my cuffs away from the wooden splinters; finally free of the headboard. "Ouch. Shit. I think I've broken my wrist." I tell Gail as I try to protect my injured limb.

Jason grabs the cuffs and pulls until I think he will burst. His face is scarlet and his eyes clinched closed as I feel the chain finally pop, allowing my hands to separate. I'm able to move over to Christian and give him a kiss on his forehead. "I love you. You're going to be okay. I promise."

Then Gail quickly pulls me away by the shoulders, "Ana we have to get you dressed." She helps me to my dressing room and assists me into my jeans and a pullover sweater, no time for underwear. I run to our medicine chest and grab a bottle of aspirin spilling them all over the vanity and floor to get just one tablet, then rush back to Christian and shove it in his mouth.

" Here, baby. I know it tastes bad, but I think you need this. Just chew it if you can." Christian makes an even more sour face as he chews the white tablet. Just as I do that the paramedics rush into the room. Jason points toward Christian still gasping on the bed.

"What happened?" they ask as they rush to Christian.

"He all of a sudden fell over and grabbed his chest and began gasping." I tell them. I want to crumble, but now is not the time. I'll do it later while I'm feeling humiliated.

"What was he doing when it happened?" one of the uniformed men asks.

"Um…" I look hesitant. They survey the situation ,"Never mind. Does he have any history of heart disease?" one of them asks as they plunge a needle in his arm and begin to start an IV.

"No. I'm not aware of any," I tell them as they listen to his chest, cover his nose with an oxygen mask then attach him to a portable monitor.

Gail has her arm around me and I try to pull my wrists up into my sleeves to keep them hidden.

"Is he going to be okay?" I beg.

"Not sure ma'am. We need to get him back to the ER." They get the IV fluids started on him.

"Is he on any medications, ma'am?" they ask.

"None that I'm aware of." I shake my head in a panic.

"No blue pills?" one asks just to make sure.

"No. Nothing. He's always been perfectly healthy. He has had indigestion lately," I offer. "Oh I did just give him an aspirin."

"Okay. We need to know that." The other EMT returns with a third and they get him on the stretcher and secured. "We're going to get him to the ER. You can follow us."

"I'll drive you Ana." Jason tells me.

"Okay. Please. Please take care of him," I beg the men.

"We will. We need to get going." They rush him out with Jason knocking chairs over to clear their way.

"Ana I'll take care of the kids Gail tells me as she hands me my shoes and purse. You go with Jason and make sure they look at your arm."

Jason and I follow the stretcher as it goes down the hall and they carefully lower it down the staircase. Once at the foot of the stairs, I rush around to grab Christian's hand and kiss him, "I'm right behind you sweetheart. I won't leave you." I detect him trying to give me a faint smile beneath the plastic oxygen mask.

As they are loading my husband into the ambulance and securing him, I stand at the back door of the vehicle and watch as they switch him over to the monitor in the truck and secure his IV fluids. The EMT begins to converse with the ER doctor via radio and transmit an ECG to the ER as they close the doors on me.

I know how Christian must have felt when they closed the ambulance doors on him when we lost Sam. I feel like he is being torn away from me. Like his heart is being ripped away from mine. Jason pulls up in the SUV and reaches over and opens the door for me to get in. I scramble in not wanting to waste a second of precious time. The ambulance begins to pull away down the drive and Jason is right behind it.

The ride to the hospital seems like hours, but in fact it is only minutes. Jason never loses sight of the ambulance tail lights as we follow it on the journey. The SUV slides up to the door of the ER and Jason lets me out as he leaves to quickly park the car. They are already taking Christian out of the ambulance and wheeling him in through double doors of the ER. I run over and follow him in. He is wheeled into one of the small exam rooms and soon he is surrounded by men and women in scrubs and white coats. They furiously begin to work on him, reading ECG strips, drawing blood and pushing medications into him through his IV. I watch helplessly as they work, never knowing when he'll take his next breath and praying that he does. One of the nurses asks me questions as she tries to take a medical history on him. His past surgeries, illnesses, medications all of that are negative except for that gunshot wound last year. I let them know about the bullet that is still lodged in his chest. Then the question I can't answer, "Does he have a family history of heart disease?"

"I don't know," I answer.

"Well did either of his parents have a heart attack or die from a heart attack?" she asks insistently.

I shake my head, "I don't know. He was adopted. He never knew his biological parents."

She nods understanding.

They finally let me come in and sit with him. He's looking a little better. His color is better and he is breathing easier. I grab his hand and he grips mine like he will never let it go. The pain is excruciating, but I'm not letting go. He looks over at me as I hover next to him and I see the fear in his grey eyes. I've only seen it a few times before and always when he is not in control of a situation. "It's okay, baby." I rub his brow and hair as I try to calm and comfort him. "I'm here Christian. I'm here baby."

After an eternity, I can hear Grace's voice down the hall and in an instant her worried face appears through the door along with Carrick's. She stops and gasps when she sees her baby boy lying in a hospital bed, hooked up to monitors and oxygen and IV fluids. Even though she is very familiar with all of them, it's different when they are connected to your child.

"Sweetheart. My baby. What happened?" she asks as she reaches over to embrace him.

"They think he may have had a heart attack, Grace," I offer.

"My God. I know it can happen at any age; you're just so young sweetheart. And we have no idea of your family history for heart disease." She looks so worried.

"How are you feeling son?" Carrick asks.

"Better," Christian mumbles through his oxygen mask.

"I'm sure they've given him something for the pain while they run the labs on him," she assures us.

She looks over at my wrist, "Ana. What in the world have you done?"

Looking down I see my blue, swollen hand, "I think I may have hurt my wrist."

Grace moves to walk over to me, "Let me have a look at it."

I remember the cuff that is still on my wrist, "NO! I mean I think it's okay." I try to put her off.

"Blue is not okay." She insists as she grabs my arm and pulls my sleeve back to examine my wrist. For an instant I see a look of bemusement color her face and then recognition as she slides my sleeve back down over the metal cuff. "It's swollen and out of alignment. Can you grip my hand dear?" she asks.

I grimace as I try, "I don't think so."

"It looks broken. We should get an x ray," she says calmly never mentioning the odd piece of jewelry around my wrist.

"I can't leave Christian. I'll do it later," I insist.

"Ana. It needs to be tended to. You don't want to lose any function in your hand. I'll go get someone to order an x-ray for you," she smiles at me. "I want to talk to Dr. Bennett anyway."

Carrick and Grace are out in the waiting room and have been joined by Kate, Elliott, Mia and Ethan. I'm still sitting beside Christian's bed when the doctor comes in.

"Well, Mr. Grey. You gave us quite a scare there for a while. How are you feeling?" he asks.

Christian nods and tries to talk. "How's your breathing?" the doctor asks. "Your sats look good. Let's take this thing off of you." He reaches up and removes the oxygen mask and Christian looks relieved and takes a big breath of room air.

"I've looked at all the tests and from all indications, you seem to have had an anxiety attack, Mr. Grey."

I'm stunned. "It wasn't a heart attack?" I ask.

"No. They can be very similar and hard to distinguish between the two. But the tests have ruled out heart attack. Now I've given you some diazepam through your IV and you should be feeling better."

Christian nods, "Yes. Much."

"Have you been under and increased amount of stress lately, Mr. Grey?" Dr. Bennett asks.

"No. Nothing." Christian tells him.

I give him a hard sideways glare. "Mrs. Grey?" the doctor asks.

"Yes he has. He's always under a lot of pressure, doctor. And we've had a very stressful last few months. Last year really." I correct Christian's story.

"I see. Well this isn't unusual then. I want to make sure you are okay and then I'll send you home with something to relax you and something for anxiety. I think you may be on the verge of a gastric ulcer, so I'll give you something for your stomach and a diet to follow as well. And I suggest you might want to look into possibly seeing a therapist to discuss whatever is causing this stress, and learn ways of coping with it. Stress can really do a number on your body. It's best to try to do whatever you can to decrease it and learn to cope with it." He looks over at me, "Mrs. Grey, Dr. Trevelyan-Grey has asked me to order an x-ray of your hand. She thinks you might have broken your wrist. They should be down shortly to take you over for an x-ray. Until then just stay in here and chill out for a while."

"Thank you doctor." I call after him.

"Yes , thank you." Christian echoes me. He looks at me, "What did you do to your wrist, baby?"

"I'll explain it when we get home. You just rest and don't talk. You fucking scared me to death, Christian." I begin to cry and I can't decide if I'm relieved or angry, probably both. Whichever it is, it has me trembling.

Christian falls asleep from the muscle relaxers and they come to take me down to x-ray. The technician rolls up my sleeve to take the pictures and says un-phased, "Well, that will have to come off."

I have forgotten about the cuff still on my wrist. Without saying anything else he calls down to the ER. Within minutes a nice gentleman appears with a hack saw and asks if it is okay to saw through the cuff still on my wrist. I give him the okay and he makes quick work of freeing me from my embarrassing jewelry. He hands it back to me after he finishes.

"Thank you," I quietly tell him as I take the pieces from him. I toss them over in the trash can and then let them take the pictures of my pitiful wrist. I wait another eternity for the x-ray to be read and then to be told that my wrist is indeed broken and the fracture needs to be reduced. Thank heaven it doesn't need surgical repair. I sign all the forms and submit to the light anesthesia while the doctor sets my wrist and brings it back into proper alignment. When the sedation begins to wear off, I look down at my wrist and see the splint that is on it. Suddenly the memory of the entire humiliating evening comes flooding back. "Oh God. Why me?" I groan as I begin to wake up. "What did I ever do to deserve this?"

"What is it dear?" the nurse asks.

"Nothing," I grumble.

Soon enough the Orthopedist comes in and tells me that I had a simple fracture and that I will need to wear the splint for a week and then come back to have more x-rays and a cast put on, which I will have to wear for about six more weeks. He hands me a prescription for some pain medication and a paper with instructions for care and an appointment date and time to see him again. I'm wheeled back in to see Christian sitting up and in a lot better shape than I am.

"Hey, baby. How do you feel?" he asks.

"Evidently worse than you," I groan.

"I'm sorry. I want to hear just how you managed to break your wrist after we get home," he tells me.

"I'll be more than glad to share it with you," I sigh. "Have they released you yet?"

"Almost. Just waiting for paperwork and prescriptions," he gives me a big smile. I get out of my chair and walk out to tell everyone that we are alive and will be going home shortly. All eyes are on me as they wait for news. I reach up and brush my hair out of my eyes as I walk toward them. Suddenly I see six sets of eyes looking strangely at me and realize the other cuff is exposed. Whatever.

"Hi everyone. Christian is okay. It wasn't a heart attack. It was an anxiety attack. He's been under so much stress lately and his body just couldn't continue like that. The doctor has given him some antianxiety medication and something for his stomach. He should be fine. He just needs to try to get rid of some of the stress in his life."

"What about you? What did they say about your arm?" Mia asks.

"Oh," I look down at my splint. "It's fractured, but they set it and I have to wear this splint for a week and then come back for a cast. We're okay really. Everyone go home and get some rest. It's been a very long night."

"Ana?" Mia asks. "What's that?" she asks.

"What?"

"Your other wrist. What's that?"

Looking down I examine the other cuff still attached to me. I just shrug, "What can I say? A little spice keeps things interesting." I'm too tired to discuss it, so I turn around and walk back to my husband leaving them to their imagination in the waiting room.

Taylor helps Christian dress; he has gone home and gotten clothes for him. I'm so tired and my wrist hurts so much I can hardly function. Looking down at my wrists they are cut and black and blue and chaffed. All of that pulling and tugging really did take a toll on them. How in the world will I ever explain all of this to anyone? Guess I'll be wearing long sleeves for a while.

Taylor gets Christian and me in the SUV and we head for our house. Sitting in the back seat I lean over on Christian, "Baby this was the worst birthday ever. It almost killed both of us."

"Well we'll certainly remember it," he tries to cheer me up. He wraps his arm around my shoulders and pulls me close. "We're alive, so I would say it was a success."

Finally at home Taylor gets us in the house. Gail is asleep on the sofa and wakes as we walk in the house. The sun is just coming up and the world is taking on color again. "Oh Mr. Grey. You don't know how bad you scared me. Are you okay?" she asks as she rushes toward us.

"Yes, yes Gail. It was just stress, not a heart attack. I'm much better." He looks down at me, "I can't say the same for my wife."

"Oh, Ana, dear you look dreadful." She has a pained sympathetic look on her face.

"Thanks Gail. I feel pretty dreadful. How are the kids?" I ask.

"Still asleep. Grace never woke up, but Teddy was pretty upset for a while. I read to him and we talked for a while. I laid down in his bed with him until he fell asleep. He's still asleep right now."

"Thank you. The both of you saved our lives. You have no idea what you mean to us," I try to explain while I hold back tears.

"Ana, you're exhausted. You both need to get upstairs and get to bed. Don't worry about the kids we'll look after them while you both get some sleep."

"I could use some sleep." I try to give her a smile.

"Let's get upstairs, Mr. Grey and get a little rest. The kids will be up soon enough." Christian and I turn to go upstairs arm in arm and Gail stops us, "I've made up the green guest room for you, she tells us.

"What?" I stop to look at her.

"You can't sleep in your room. At least not right now."

"Okay." I'm too tired to ask why so Christian and I continue our trek up the staircase and down the hall. We stop at our room and gaze in in horror. The door is off the hinges and the frame is pulled off and splintered into pieces. The headboard is detached from the bed and smashed into bits. The wall is smashed in behind it where Taylor kicked it to try to free me. The bed is partially resting on the floor. The bed linens are stripped from the bed and strewn around the room. The lamp on the bedside table has been knocked off and has smashed into pieces and the shade is all bent in. The occasional chairs are knocked over resting on their sides.

"Oh, my God, Christian. It's a disaster," I gasp.

He looks at me with a strange expression on his face, "You know I don't remember much of anything that happened last night, but did we have birthday sex…..or vampire sex? And whatever it was, I'd give everything I own to be able to remember it."


	27. Chapter 27

_**Fifty Shades…Full Circle**_

_**Chapter 27**_

Christian and I make our way to the green guest room and Gail has laid out a gown and robe for me and bottoms and a robe for Christian. Bless her heart she is the best. Plopping myself on the bed I grimace as I try to pull my sweater over my head.

"Wait just a minute, sweetheart. I'll help you," Christian walks in front of me and helps me pull my sweater off. "Hmm. No underwear. Sexy."

"Christian, I didn't have time. I was lucky to finally get some clothes on," I sigh.

Christian drops to his knees in front of me, "Baby! What the fuck happened to your wrists? They're mutilated."

"I know. They hurt." I try to explain as I inspect the tortured skin above my hands. The hospital bandaged some of the cut and torn skin.

"Baby tell me what happened. I just can't remember much," he gently kisses the maimed skin.

"Help me get into my gown and I'll tell you the whole story," I tell him.

Christian has me stand and unzips my jeans helping me step out of them. "Hmm. No panties either."

"Back down, Christian." I admonish him. Christian takes the silk gown and pulls it over my head letting it drop down skimming over my body.

"There. You sit in the chair and I'll get the bed." Christian makes quick work of getting into his Pj bottoms and getting the bed turned down. He helps me get in and then snuggles in against me pulling me over against him. I rest my head on his chest and finally begin to relax.

"Now. What happened to you?" he asks.

I begin to try to tell him as I burst into tears. "We were….and then when you..then you…and I couldn't get lose…and then I pulled hard …and Teddy…"

"Whoa. Baby I can't understand a word you're saying. Just calm down." He strokes my hair and kisses my head.

I sniffle and try to stop the flood of emotion, "I thought you were fucking dying, Christian."

"Hell, I thought I was dying too!" He almost screams.

"Okay. Okay. We were having birthday sex. You had cuffed me to the bed. You used the set that doesn't have the release button."

"I know. I like those better. I like the idea that there is no chance of you hitting the button and getting loose. Okay. I do remember that much," he explains.

"Well after you….came, you clutched your chest and fell over. You were so pale and drenched in sweat. You couldn't breathe, Christian." I sniffle." I couldn't get loose. I couldn't get out of the handcuffs. You scared the shit out of me!"

"I'm sorry , baby. I didn't mean to scare you." He pulls me tighter.

"I was screaming and pulling, trying to get out of the cuffs. I pulled really hard and that's when my wrist broke. It hurt so bad….anyway that's when Teddy came to the door."

"Teddy?!"

"Yes. Teddy saved your life. Or would have if you had actually had a heart attack. I was so afraid that he'd get in and see us like that." I begin to cry again just thinking about it.

"It's okay baby, just calm down," he tells me.

"Anyway, I had him call Gail and Taylor. They called 911 and then rushed over and Jason broke the door down. He and Gail got us covered up and then Jason had to break the headboard to get me loose. Gail got me dressed and we got you to the hospital. You remember the rest right?"

"Yes. I think so. So that's why the bedroom looks like it does?" he asks.

"Yes. All of that was because of you," I tell him.

"So I didn't miss any really good sex?" he asks.

"Christian will you fucking stop that! Forget the damn sex." I sit up and glare at him. " We all thought you were dying. And from now on we are making some changes. I don't care how kinky we like it, I will never be in that situation again. You will never leave me where I can't get lose in an emergency. Ever!"

"Okay. Okay. I understand."

"What would we have done if Teddy had seen all of that? I'm still trying to figure out how to explain it to him. We have to come up with a decent story to tell him. I'm sure he'll have questions."

"We'll think of something. I'll just agree with whatever you tell him. How's that?" he asks.

"Whatever. I'm too exhausted to think right now and my wrist hurts."

"Where are your pain pills?" he asks.

"In my purse along with your prescriptions."

Christian gets up and gets a pill out of the bottle and grabs a glass of water from the bathroom. "Here. Maybe this will help. " He hands me the medication and I wash it down with the water. He returns to bed and pulls me to him. "Go to sleep Baby. We'll figure it all out when we get up. Everything will be okay."

I finally relax a bit and try to get to sleep.

"Ana?" I hear Christian whisper.

"Yes, sweetheart?" I answer.

"Did Taylor see you naked?" he whispers.

I can't help but break into sobs again."Fuck you Christian. Of course he saw me naked. Or mostly naked. I tried to cover up. And if it makes you feel any better, Gail saw you naked. I've never been so mortified in all my life."

He pulls me tighter. "I'm sorry baby. It'll be okay. Don't cry, I hate it when you cry."

I turn to face him, "Christian I'm not near as upset about all of that as I am over the fact that I could have lost you. You have no idea how terrified I was. I never knew which breath was going to be your last." I cry against his chest.

"I know just how you feel." He strokes my hair and whispers to me. " I remember when you almost bled to death with Sam. I didn't think I would be able to go on without you."

"At least you weren't naked at the time."

"No." He snorts, " I did have a tux on."

"Christian your family saw the handcuffs on me. Your mother saw them."

"What did you tell them?" he asks.

"The truth. I just told them we liked to keep things interesting. What else could I say? That I'd been placed under arrest?" I can't stop sniffling.

I snuggle in closer. "Please just hold me. I realized I can't live without you Christian Grey. We're going to make some changes, because I want you around for a very long time."

"Yes, ma'am." He kisses my forehead. "I'm sorry you had to go through all that. And now you have a broken wrist. I'm so sorry baby."

"I'll live. I didn't ask, how are you?"

"Oh, I'm okay. I'm tired and I ache all over. I was pretty scared myself there for a while. I thought I might be a goner for a bit," he brushes my hair behind my ear with his fingers.

"God Christian I was so damned frightened." I pull him as tight to me as I can.

"Hey watch your arm." He reminds me as he pulls it to his mouth and gently kisses my injured limb. "Get some rest baby."

* * *

Pulled out of my slumber by a rustle outside the door I look out the window at the noon day sun. I can hear Gail trying to get Teddy away from the door.

"But I want to talk to Mom and Dad, Gail."

"Later baby. Mom and Dad aren't feeling well this morning. We need to let them get some sleep. Come downstairs with me for a while."

God, what would we do without that woman? She and Taylor have literally saved our lives on more than one occasion. Looking over at Christian, I want to burst into tears again. I've never been as frightened as I was last night. I'd rather something happen to me than to have to live without him. We really need to talk about making some changes. Maybe I can convince him to slow down a little. If not, I'll set his mother on him. She seems to be able to get through to him.

I'm still so sleepy. I guess it's the pain medicine. I don't want to get up, but I really want to see Teddy. I know he must be so upset. I softly kiss Christian on his forehead and easily slide out of bed. Shrugging into my robe I quietly ease out the door. I can hear Teddy in the kitchen with Gail as I walk down the staircase.

"Mom! Mom, are you okay?" he runs and launches himself at me.

I wrap him in my arms as best as I can, "I'm fine baby." I squat down to his level to talk to him. "I'm so proud of you Teddy. I needed your help last night and you were such a big boy. You really helped Mommy."

"What happened? Did you and dad get sick?" he asks.

"Yes. Sort of baby. Daddy got sick and I was trying to help him and had an accident and broke my wrist," I hold my arm up for him to see the injury. "The door was locked and neither of us could get to it to get it unlocked. You were such a big boy to call Gail and Taylor to come help us."

"Is Dad okay, too?" he looks so worried.

Before I can answer, "I'm fine son. I'm feeling much better." I hear Christian behind me.

"What happened Dad?" he throws his arms around Christian's waist as Christian reaches out to help me back to my feet. "Are you okay, baby?" he asks me.

I nod. "Come on, Theodore. Let's go in the family room and Mom and I will tell you all about it."

"Gail. I just don't know what to say. I want to talk to you about it, but I really need to help talk to Teddy. Will you have coffee with me later?" I ask.

"Of course, Ana. And don't worry about it. I'm just glad Jason and I were here. It could have been a disaster if we had gone out of town like we had planned." She smiles at me. "You talk to Teddy, with Mr. Grey. He was pretty upset last night. We'll sit down later. I'll bring you in a cup in a minute."

"Thanks."

I meet Christian and Teddy in the family room and sit on the sofa with them. Grace is sitting in the floor watching TV and talking to her rabbit. She is oblivious to the happenings last night. Thank heavens.

"Mom are you going to get a cast?" Teddy asks.

"Yes. I expect so. The doctor wants to wait a week before he puts one on."

"Can I sign it?" he lights up.

"Well. I guess you can, when the time comes, sweetheart." I reach over and stroke his little cheek.

"Dad, are you all better now?" he asks looking at Christian.

"I think so, son. The doctor said I was just working too much."

"But, Mom tells you that all the time." Oh, out of the mouth of babes.

"Yes son. I know she does. I guess I'll have to start listening to Mom more." he rubs Teddy's head. "Are you alright?"

"Yep. I just wanted to make sure you and Mom were okay. You really messed your bedroom up. It's going to take a while to fix it. You must have been sick real bad."

"Yes, son I felt pretty bad."

"Did you vomik a lot?"

"What? Did I vomik?" Christian chuckles. "No son. It wasn't that kind of sick. And you mean vomit."

"Yeah. I hope I don't get it because I usually vomik real bad when I get really sick."

"Well, I doubt you'll catch it."

Gail brings Christian a cup of coffee and me a cup of tea and sets them on the coffee table. "Thank you Gail." I tell her.

Christian reaches for his cup and before he can take a sip, "What did the doctor say about coffee?" I ask him.

"He said to cut back," he tells me as he takes a big gulp. Then he gives me a big smile.

"Ana, Mr. Grey, would you like breakfast or lunch?" Gail asks.

"Breakfast I think," Christian offers.

"Yes. Breakfast would be great. Have the kids had breakfast?" I ask.

"Well they wanted cold cereal earlier, but they haven't had a hot meal yet. I thought I'd make them some waffles and bacon," she tells us.

"Okay. That sounds good. Thank you Gail." I tell her.

"Yes. Thanks Gail."

"Gail." I call after her.

"Yes, Ana." She turns to look at me.

"After lunch. I want you to go back home and get some rest. You're off duty."

"Okay. I could use a nap. I've had quite enough excitement for a while," she gives us both smirk.

Snuggling next to my husband we watch the kids play on the floor as we sip our morning beverages while we wait for breakfast. Christian startles me as he wipes a tear from my cheek. "It's okay sweetheart. I'm here."

"I know. I just died a thousand times last night. I thought I'd lost you. We have to make a pact that we have to go together, because I can't live without you."

"Okay, but, can we wait a while? I'd like to get the kids grown before we depart," he strokes my hair.

"Yes." I chuckle. "In the mean-time, we need some new equipment. Or I need to learn to channel Harry Houdini."

"I don't know why I used those cuffs. Cuffs really can really leave some marks."

"At least you used the double lock cuffs, so they didn't keep getting tighter and tighter. That could have been a disaster. Or at least more of a disaster."

"I'm sorry." he kisses my hair. "I think I was just a bit over enthusiastic. I didn't plan very well. That's not like me."

"Christian. I really want you to try to slow down a little. I don't want to harp on you about it, but, baby if you don't slow up and try to get rid of some stress, the next time could be a real heart attack."

He nods. "I know. I'll do my best."

"Just try to turn it off when you walk in the door. Leave it at the office. "

"Baby, what you don't understand is that leaving it behind is more stressful for me than the work. I love what I do." He looks down at me and I move in closer. "Trying to leave something hanging just because it's five o'clock would worry the shit out of me. Getting something resolved is very relaxing for me. There's a great sense of satisfaction when I accomplish something."

"I know. And I know harping on you will just make things worse. We just need to find some way of destressing you."

"I know exactly how you can destress me." he grins. "In fact," he snuggles in closer and pulls me to him," I don't think we finished last night. I do believe I owe you something."

"You owe me your smiling face for the next fifty or sixty years, Mr. Grey. Do you think we'll still want to have sex when we're eighty?" I ask him.

"I can't imagine a time that I wouldn't want to fuck, especially you," he whispers.

"Well, I may not look so great at eighty," I remind him.

"I'll close my eyes," he chuckles and holds me tight to keep me from smacking him.

"You may not look so great yourself." I can't imagine him ever not looking good.

"Yeah, but you'll still love me."

"Yes. I imagine I'll still love you. I can't imagine not loving you; old and wrinkled as you'll be."

Looking down at my wrist, "I can't believe I have to start a new job next Monday with a cast on my arm. I guess I'll have to come up with some interesting story of how I broke it."

Christian takes another sip of his coffee, "Well the truth is pretty fucking interesting if you ask me." He grins between sips. "Maybe you could tell them that you were editing some new version of , Kama Sutra, and were trying some of the things out to test the authenticity."

"Right. That ought to make a good impression."

"There's a lot to be said for taking your work home with you. Hey, do you think you might be assigned authors who write Erotica? That might make the job very interesting." He wraps me tighter in his arms. "Just think we could try it all out. Test drive the information so to speak."

I glare up at him, "You're insane. Why would I want to read erotica all day and then spend all night with you?" I'm sure I look horrified. " A person can only take so much sex. Besides you could write your own erotic book. Like they say, 'write what you know'. And I do believe you're an expert on the subject."

"Well, we all have to be good at something I guess," he feigns pride.

I can feel his phone vibrate in his jeans pocket beneath me. "Mmmm. I think you have a call."

"Yep." He moves me to dig into his pocket for the device. "Grey….. No fucking shit…..that's the best news I've heard in a while….who did it?...That's fucking great…..No problem ..and thanks." He pitches his phone over on the table.

"Good news?" I bat my eyes at him.

"Yep. The shipment is on its way. It'll be there by the end of the week," he grins.

"Oh, baby. I'm so glad. I know how worried you were about it."

"Yeah. That's a load off my mind right there."

"Hey Grace. Come see your dad," Christian asks his daughter who has been ignoring him this morning.

"I busthy Daddy," she tells him.

"Too busy to come see me?" he asks almost hurt. He murmurs over to me," I almost died and the kid can't take a minute to come talk to me."

"Maybe she's just hanging around for her inheritance," I whisper back. "You got her hopes up last night."

He moves me aside and gets up and walks over to his daughter. "She's going to really be pissed when she finds out how it's all set up. My girl is going to be a trust fund baby." He bends down and yanks her up in his arms and kisses her tummy, " Carla Grace Grey, you come and see me."

She squeals, "Daddy! Daddy no! I tickish." She giggles at him.

"I'll show you ticklish if you don't come give me some attention," he kisses her tummy again.

God, I'm so glad he's okay.

The sun is streaming through the glass wall at the back of the house as I take my cup for a refill in the kitchen.

"Breakfast is almost ready, Ana." Gail looks over her shoulder as she takes another waffle out of the machine.

"Thanks for doing this Gail. I'm pretty useless with this broken wrist and we all know what Christian's culinary skills consist of. "

"Not a problem. I can't watch all of you starve," she giggles.

"Gail." I hesitate. "I have no idea where to start…" I try to talk as I pour another cup of steaming water.

"Ana. You don't have to say a word." She continues to prepare breakfast as she talks. "I've known you what eight years and Mr. Grey gosh….. I don't even remember. Before you came I saw things I've tried for years to erase from my mind. That Williams woman and Ms. Lincoln are just two of them. Good riddance to bad trash, I say." She turns around to look at me. "What happened last night is nothing. I've never talked about it, and as a wife I can't betray Jason by giving out too much information, but Jason and I have a really good, interesting sex life, so I totally understand." She turns back to cooking, "Oh, nothing like Mr. Grey's before he met you. Whew! That could ruin you for life. But nothing can really surprise me. And I certainly don't judge."

"Gail, I know you've seen a lot since you started to work for Mr. Grey. But last night was…"

"It was nothing. You two aren't the only couple in the world to own a pair of handcuffs. Course you might be the only two to end up butt naked before a good part of Seattle," she giggles.

"Thanks, Mrs. Taylor. I've never been more humiliated in my life. The cuffs were bad enough, but being naked. Good God, I'll never be able to live it down."

"At least you're young and attractive. Just think what would happen if it had been Jason and me in that position." She laughs, "That could have been real ugly."

"Well. I'm sorry. It was bad enough that I was naked, I'm sorry that you had to see…well, you know Christian was.."

"Ana, I've never told a sole this, but it's not the first time. Before you came he had his weekend guests and he pretty much used his entire apartment for his recreational activities. I've accidentally walked in on several occasions so has Jason. I've never told him that, and I would die if he ever found out, but I'm not a stranger to the man's ….backside."

I can't help but giggle, "No I imagine you've seen enough to last a lifetime since you've been here."

"Okay call the crew. Breakfast is ready." She tells me.


	28. Chapter 28

_**Fifty Shades…Full Circle**_

_**Chapter 28**_

This blasted cast is driving me crazy. I'm trying to pack my things to go to Sacramento tomorrow and it's next to impossible with this cast on. Hopefully it will get better as I get used to it. It was so nice and clean when they put it on. Teddy and Grace made quick work of that. Those kids are terrorists with markers. I've been tattooed with drawings of the entire family including Fred and everybody's signatures. Grace can't write yet, but she gave it the old college try. Christian even insisted on signing it. It's hard to tell what his signature says. Looks like hen scratching, but my heart wrenches every time I look at it thinking that he could have easily not been here to sign it.

Back to trying to fold things and get them packed into this suitcase. Myra has made sure that my business clothes are cleaned and pressed. All I have to do is put them in the garment bag. I'll try to get by with one pair of dress shoes and one pair of casual shoes. I also need something to wear when I meet Mrs. Douglas. I need to remind myself to try to get Christian's parent's medical history, just in case he decides not to meet with her. It would have come in handy when he had that anxiety attack.

"Hey baby, need any help?" Christian asks as he walks back in the bedroom adjusting himself. Yes, Mr. Perfection is still a man and he occasionally adjusts himself. Thank God he doesn't do it in public.

"Got a little hitch in your step baby?" I ask with a big smirk.

"Nah, just the usual hard on I get when I look at you."

"Well, I think I've about got it. I may need you to close this suitcase for me after I get everything in it." I continue to fold and arrange things in the baggage. "Are you going to miss me?"

"You have no idea." He slides his arms around my waist and kisses my neck. "That bed's going to be awfully big and lonely without you."

"You'll survive." I turn around to hug him. "Mine will be just as big and lonely. This is how I feel when you are about to leave on a business trip. I absolutely dread the times when you go away."

"I know me too." He tucks my hair behind my ear. "I won't sleep until you get home."

"You'd better. You have two kids to take care of. I'd like them both alive when I get home, please."

"I think I can keep two small children alive for a couple of days." He kisses my neck and I want to melt.

"It's harder than you think, Mr. Grey. They may be little but they are Grey's. They can be a handful." I feel my breath as it bounces off of his cheek. "Shit Christian. I can't do this now. I have to get packed baby."

"I'm just going to miss you. I don't want you to go. Don't go, baby," he almost begs.

"Christian, I have to. I'll be back. Just think how good, 'I missed you I'm glad you're back' sex will be."

"I'd rather have, 'I'm glad you didn't go' sex."

I roll my eyes at him, "Oh, go lock the door. I guess I need to give you something to think about while I'm gone."

* * *

The hair on Christian's chest prickles against my cheek as I snuggle in against him. Taking in a long deep breath, he smells so damn good. I love the smell of him, the feel of him, the touch of him. After all these years and the kids, he can still make me feel like we are the young couple we were when we met. He still makes my tummy flutter just like he did the first time.

"Christian, thank you. I know this isn't easy for you." I look up at him and trace his jaw with my fingers. The ones hanging out of the end of my cast.

"What are you thanking me for?" he asks. "And watch that cast. It becomes a weapon when we have sex. Every time you put your arms around me, you hit me in the head with that thing."

He makes me giggle, "I'm sorry. It's heavy and I'm not used to it yet. Seriously, though, I know it's not easy for you to let me go to work for Paul."

He turns over to face me and puts his arms around me, "I still don't know why you won't go back to Grey Publishing. The job's yours. All you have to do is walk back in to it. You can run the whole show there. You don't have to answer to anyone."

" I know. But I'd still have to answer to you. Baby I can't work for you all day and live with you the rest of the time. Besides, Grey Publishing already has someone running it. Remember Mike Johnson?"

"I can get rid of him. Transfer him somewhere else."

"Christian that's not right. You can't just take his job away and give it to me just because I'm your wife."

"Yes I can."

"Well, technically, yes you can. But baby, I wouldn't have the respect of one person on staff if you did that." I trace his lips with my fingers. "Besides I've told you I have no desire to run the company. I want to read manuscripts, I want to meet and talk with authors. I want to promote established talent and nurture young talent…..I love you, but you're the one who likes numbers and spreadsheets. Not me."

"Well, then you could just edit if you want to. Hell, do whatever you want."

"Christian do you have any idea how hard that would be for Mike? It would be awful for him to have to manage the owner's wife. Heck, I'm half owner, so he would technically be managing his owner. Nobody could be expected to do that and remain sane. Besides he's doing a really good job there. You don't want to lose him."

"You're probably right. I guess I can live with it. As long as you're happy. That's what counts."

"Thank you." I settle back in to him. "Have I told you that I love you?"

"Yes. But you can tell me again." He pulls me to him and I start to wrap my arm around his neck. "Come here."

"Ahh. Shit!" Christian rolls on his back and clutches his left cheek.

"Oh, Baby. I'm sorry. Are you okay?" I plead.

"No. I'm not fucking okay," he spits.

I reach over to him, "Move your hand. Let me see."

"No. Get away. You're trying to kill me with that thing."

I lean over and peel his hands away from his face and inspect his cheek,"Eww. That left a mark." I gently touch the red scraped area under his left eye. "Does it hurt?"

"Fuck yes it hurts!" he complains.

"Let me get you a cold cloth." I leave and return sitting next to him on the bed and place the cool cloth on his eye. "There. That should help. Baby I'm sorry. I didn't mean to hit you. Maybe I need to put some bubble wrap around it."

"Just don't get too close to the kids with it."

"Oh, hush." I admonish him. "You aren't hurt that bad. "I need to get dressed and go check on the kids. We've been up here almost twenty minutes. I need to make sure they are still alive."

I get up and slip back into my jeans and sweater. "Come on Grey. Get dressed. We have kids to check on and I need to finish getting ready to leave tomorrow."

"Give me a minute to put my eye back in the socket, and I'll be right with you."

"I'll meet you downstairs in the family room. I have steaks out for dinner, will you do the grill?"

"I guess. Let me get my clothes on and I'm right behind you," he moans.

I run downstairs and the kids are sitting in the floor still watching TV quiet as little mice. I'm going to miss them. I hate being separated from my kids even for a day. "Hey guys. Watcha' doin'?"

"Watching TV," Teddy answers.

"What are you watching?" I ask them.

"I don't know, Mom." Teddy says, "Grace has the remote and she turned it on."

"What in the world!" I run over and grab the remote away from Grace and turn the TV off. "How did you get that channel?" I ask them.

"I don't know Mom. Grace did it," Teddy points to his sister.

"Carla Grace, how did you get that on?" I'm close to hysterical.

"I pay wif tha emote and it just comed on," she looks so innocent.

"What's all the fuss about?" Christian asks as he hits the bottom step of the staircase wearing his jeans and a T-shirt. No shoes. I love those feet.

"Our children were watching the Playboy channel on cable. That's what the fuss is about." I must sound horrified.

"What? How did that happen. We have a parental lock on the remote."

"I have no idea. Grace was punching buttons and voila, they're getting an education." I explain. "Teddy how long were you watching this?"

"Not long. She just got it turned on, " he says. "Those people sure were acting weird."

"Yes. I'm sure they were."

Christian grabs the remote. "Okay. The remote is now officially off limits. Do you two understand?"

"Yes, dad." Teddy pouts.

"Carla Grace? Did you hear me?" he asks his daughter.

"Yesth, daddy." She turns around and smiles at him. "Daddy. Wha hoppen to you eye?"

"Your mother hit me," he answers without further explanation.

"It was an accident, kids. I accidentally hit him with my cast. He'll be fine." I explain. God, maybe going back to work will give me a rest. Maybe being away from them for a day or two won't be so awful.

"So what do you think they saw?" Christian asks as he walks into the kitchen to get the steaks to put on the grill.

"I don't think it was much. When I saw it, there was some adult talk show on. Teddy said she had just turned it on, so maybe nothing that will scar them."

"How do you think the little shit, got the channel unblocked?" he asks.

"Just a bunch of lucky punches I guess." I shake my head. "Only Grace would be able to accomplish something like that."

"God she's a handful," he snorts.

"She's your daughter, Christian Grey."

"Yes, she certainly is." He says with a huge grin on his face. He gives me a quick kiss as he grabs the meat and heads back out to the patio.

I have everything ready and we are waiting for the grill to heat up for the steaks. Teddy and Grace are in the back yard playing and Christian is in the kitchen with me opening a bottle on Pulley Fume for us.

"MOM! DAD! QUICK!" we hear Teddy scream hysterically.

Christian and I lock eyes in horror, "What the fuck?" he growls.

We instantly run outside assuming someone is bleeding to death. Both kids are upright and breathing. "Teddy. What is it honey?" I ask.

He points out to the water. "Look! Out there Mom."

"What is it? I don't see anything." The sun is glistening off of the water and it is hard to see much of anything.

"Out there Mom. There is someone out there. Dad go help him."

Christian is straining hard searching the water to try to see what Teddy is so concerned about. "I'm looking son."

"Right there." Teddy points harder. He drags us farther down toward the water to get a better look.

"I think I do see something. Wait here." Christian says as he pulls his T-shirt over his head on his way running toward the fence that separates the yard from the lake. He quickly punches in the code for the gate and runs toward the water diving in and swimming out.

We put the fence and gate in when we had Teddy. It's to keep the kids away from the water and whatever is in the water away from the house.

"Christian. Be careful!" I yell after him. I know he swam in college and is a strong swimmer, but anything can happen out there. He swims away from shore and I can see him stop a few yards out and then turn and swim back to shore. Teddy and I rush down to see what Christian has extracted from the water.

He finally reaches shore and emerges from the water trying to catch his breath. He is clutching a small dog to him. "Oh my God, Christian, it's a dog." The poor thing looks like a drown rat and appears to be very grateful to Christian for rescuing him.

"Dad! It's a puppy." Teddy is just ecstatic. "Can I have him?" Teddy is reaching up for the little animal.

"Let's get him in the house and get him dried off son." I relock the gate and we all walk back toward the house. I quickly run in the house and grab a towel for the dog and one for Christian. "Come here Sweetheart." I wrap Christian in a big fluffy towel and rub him down with it trying to warm him up. Christian wraps the dog up and tries to get the water off of him.

"Does he have a collar?" I ask as Christian looks around his neck.

"Don't see one," he says.

"I want him Dad." Teddy keeps reaching up for the little dog. Christian hands the dog to Teddy, "Be careful son. He's still pretty scared."

"Can I name him?" Teddy is just beaming.

"Teddy, don't get too attached to him. He probably belongs to someone and we might need to give him back."

He looks so deflated, "But he was in the water."

"I know, baby. He probably fell off of one of the boats out on the lake. We need to try to find the owners. They're probably worried about him."

"I'm going up and get into some dry clothes," Christian grumbles. When he comes back down, Teddy is in the family room playing with his new friend.

"Christian, it's going to break his heart if he has to give that dog back."

"I know. We need to try to find the owner as soon as we can," he says taking a sip of his wine. "I'll call Mom and Dad to see what Vet they use. We'll take him and see if he has one of those chips. Maybe that will tell us who he belongs to."

"In the mean-time, what do we feed him? We don't have any dog food. I guess we could drive in to town to the store."

"I'll throw a steak on the grill for him." Christian grabs another fillet from the fridge and heads back outside to finally get our dinner cooked.

After we eat, Christian cuts the fillet into tiny bits and puts them in a bowl, setting it down in front of the little creature. "What kind of dog do you think it is?" I ask him as we watch him devour his filet.

He shrugs, "Fuzzy."

"It's small, but it doesn't really look like a puppy. I guess it's just a small grown dog. You think?" I ask him.

"I don't know. I'm not really a dog expert. But he does look grown." He takes another sip of his wine. "I guess the vet can tell us what and how old he is. I'll call and get an appointment tomorrow."

"Won't you be at work tomorrow?" I ask.

"I have meetings in the morning, but I'm going to work from home tomorrow afternoon, since my wife will be out of town."

"Gail can look after the kids," I tell him.

"I know. But I thought I'd try to stay close to home with you gone. And now that I have an office with four walls, I can work in there again."

"Thank you. I'll feel better knowing you'll be here."

"Okay, looks like he has finished, take him out to the potty." I remind Christian. "I'll set out a bowl with some water for him." I suppose we will need a bed for him. Guess I need to find an old blanket or something. Gosh I've never had a dog. I have no idea what to expect.

After dinner Christian calls his parents and gets the name of the veterinarian they use and gets a few pointers on what the little thing will need and what we need to do.

Christian walks back in the family room with the scruffy beige and white creature following close on his heels. "He sure is small. Don't step on him." I remind him.

"I can't get rid of him. He's on my heels everywhere I go." Christian complains as he sits next to me on the sofa. The dog keeps bouncing up trying to get on the sofa. "Look at him. He won't go away. Go dog. Go play with Teddy. Go." He frowns, "He's persistent."

"Christian you pulled him out of the lake and saved him from drowning, then fed him fillet mignon. I think you're stuck with him. And don't get attached. I feel sure we will find the owners. I don't want you getting upset when we give him back." I tease him.

He stares down at the little canine, "Shoo. Go away. Go play with the kids." Neither is budging.

* * *

Rolling over I move Christian off of me. He rouses a bit but settles back to sleep. I move over and put my arms around him and press my lips to his. He responds and wraps his arms around me deepening the kiss. He has a full on morning erection and we take full advantage of it since it will be the last for a few days.

"I'll miss you," he whispers.

"I'll miss you, too."

"Call me every night?" he asks.

"You know I will. And if I don't, I'm sure you'll track me down." I smile at him and kiss his nose.

"Do we have plans for our anniversary yet?" I ask.

"I haven't made any because you said you wanted to stay home," he says.

"Good. That's exactly what I want to do. Just a quiet dinner and the undivided attention of my husband for an entire evening."

"I think I can arrange that. You tell Gail what you want for dinner and I'll arrange for the champagne. What shall we do with the kids?" he asks

"I'll see if Gail and Taylor will take them for the evening. If not I'll find a sitter. Can you believe it will be eight years? And they said it wouldn't last."

He pulls me to him and wraps me in his arms as his lips seal across mine. "Wait. Who said it wouldn't last?" he asks.

"Figure of speech. Shut up and kiss me, Mr. Grey."

* * *

I get Christian off to work after profusely apologizing for giving him a black eye. It ended up being pretty blue and green. He wasn't happy and I felt really bad, or at least I told him I did. I quickly down some breakfast before getting dressed for the trip to Sacramento. The kids aren't up yet. I'll kiss them before I leave.

I get my make up on and slide into a beige sheath with a short black cardigan with ¾ sleeves. I add black leather pumps with kitten heels and diamond studs. My hair is pulled back in a chignon and grabbing my purse, I guess I'm ready. Sawyer has taken my bags down and loaded them in the SUV along with his.

"Gail." I call as I hit the bottom landing of the staircase and walk toward the kitchen. Teddy is up and in his PJs at the breakfast bar eating cereal.

"Hi Mom." He mumbles with a mouth full of Cherrios.

"Hi Sweet heart. Are you going to be a good boy while I'm gone?" I ask as I kiss his head.

"I'm always a good boy," he grumbles.

"Yes you are, sweetheart. I never have to worry about you, do I?"

"Gail I'm ready to go. Christian is going to be home around lunchtime and work from home today. Oh and they are taking the dog to the vet to get him checked out."

"I was wondering just where he came from." She says as she looks at the animal sitting up on his hind legs in the kitchen floor. "Teddy said Mr. Grey fished him out of the lake yesterday."

"Yes. He looked pretty pitiful. Looks like he's asking for some breakfast." I tell her." We don't have any dog food yet, but I think there is some leftover steak in the fridge for him."

"I already scrambled him an egg." She smiles down at him.

"Heavens. Between you and Christian he's never going to want to leave." I shake my head.

"Well I have to get going to meet the plane." I give Teddy a huge hug and a kiss. "Gail I don't need to leave you any instructions. You already know everything there is to know. I'm sure you and Myra will keep things under control."

"Oh, Myra isn't here toda," she tells me.

"Oh? Where is she?" I ask.

"She called me yesterday and asked for today off. Seems she went out of town for the weekend and wanted an extra day." She smiles. "I didn't mind, so I just told her to enjoy herself."

"Hmm. Well that was nice of you. I hope she has a good time. The kids will be fine. Try and keep Christian under control, if you can, and I'll see you Thursday."

"Don't worry about us. We'll be fine," she tells me. "You just have a safe trip."

I kiss Teddy again and start for the door. I stop and turn back, "Oh, Liz should be here today to finish up our bedroom. Just let her in and…"

"Ana. Go. Things will be fine here." She shoos me toward the door.

"Okay. I know you all will be fine. I'll just miss everyone. Take care of them for me."

"I will. Jason will be here, since Mr. Grey will be working from home. We'll be fine. Just calm down and have a nice trip. Enjoy the peace and quiet."

Giving her a big hug, I walk out and slide into the back of the waiting SUV. Sawyer gets up front and we are off down the long drive and on our way to Sacramento and my new job.


	29. Chapter 29

_**Fifty Shades…Full Circle**_

_**Chapter 29**_

**A/N: I've had a couple of questions from 'Guest' reviewers who have asked for a response. I try to answer everyone who asks a question, but I have no way to answer if you don't log in. Use a pseudo name; no one will know who you are. Then I can gladly send you a reply. **

**Meanwhile let's see what Ana is up to in Sacramento….**

* * *

Arriving at Boeing Field, Sawyer drives up to the private plane carrying Paul Sanders and my new job. He lets me out and Paul descends the steps and gives me a big hug. Sawyer unloads the luggage and secures the SUV so it will be here when we get back.

"Ana. So good to see you. Everyone is really looking forward to meeting you."  
He gives me a warm welcome.

"Thank you. I can't tell you how excited I am to finally be getting back to work." I tell him as he guides me up the steps.

Entering the cabin I'm greeted by an attractive redhead named Paula as she welcomes me to the aircraft . We make our way into the cabin and I take my seat next to Paul and get strapped in. Sawyer appears through the door and quietly makes his way back. As he gets to our seat, I stop him. "Paul I want to introduce you to Luke Sawyer. He works for Christian in security. He has been there for me and the kids more times than I can count."

Sawyer tips his head, "Mr. Sanders, pleasure, sir."

"Sawyer. Glad you're aboard. If there is anything you need, please don't hesitate to ask. I have a small security staff of my own and I'm sure they will be at your disposal should you require anything."

"Thank you sir." Sawyer quietly disappears to the far rear of the cabin and takes his seat.

The plane finally taxis and we are airborne rather quickly. I guess when you use an airport designed for private aircraft, like Boeing Field is; it is not nearly as busy as Sea-Tac is since it is primarily for commercial aircraft. I think Christian is planning to move the new plane to Boeing when it is finally finished.

Paula asks if we would like any refreshments; I ask for tea and Paul a coffee. "Ana, I hate to ask, but what on earth happened to your arm?" Paul asks.

I look down at it a bit embarrassed, "Oh, Christian was ill the other night and when I got up to help him I had an accident and fractured my wrist. It was just a stupid thing."

"Oh. How much longer do you have to wear the cast?" he asks taking a sip of his coffee.

"Well I have had it on about a week, so probably another four or five weeks. I'm still trying to get used to it."

"Ana. I'm excited for you to meet with some of the people you'll be handling. James is really looking forward to meeting with you."

"Are you sure? I mean he has worked with Frank Gilliland and Joshua Holland and so many best-selling authors. I can't believe I'll be working with them. Are you sure they won't resent working with such an inexperienced editor?"

"Ana. You aren't inexperienced. And after talking to all of them, they are really looking forward to someone younger with newer ideas and fresh approaches. Like I said, we won't let you drown. If you need help or feel overwhelmed all you have to do is let John know."

"Who's John?" I ask.

"Oh, I thought I had told you, John Gibson is Managing Editor. He will be your boss, so to speak. He will help you with all the day to day workings of things. I think you'll like him. He's young but extremely talented."

"Oh, good. I'm really excited."

"Have you talked to Carla and Bob lately?" he asks.

"It's been a month or so. They just stay so busy all the time."

He chuckles, "Yes Carla is a regular social butterfly. She seems to be on every committee at the club. And she and Bob are always on some sort of golf trip somewhere."

"Bob has been good for Mom. I think she has finally found her niche with him." I smile over at him. "What about you? What have you been up to since I saw you last?"

"Well, I've gotten engaged, actually." He smiles as he tells me.

"Oh, Paul. That's wonderful. Tell me all about her."

"Her name is Suzanne Willis and we met at a publishing conference last fall. She is really a remarkable woman."

"I'm so happy for you, Paul. When's the wedding?"

"I'm not sure, probably this fall sometime. We have to both find time in our schedules. How long were you and Christian engaged before you took the plunge?"

I can't help but laugh and take another sip of tea, "About a minute and a half."

"Seriously."

"I'm being serious. Actually we were engaged for a month before we got married. And that's only because the wedding had to be planned. Christian wanted to just run off and get married right away, but his mother wouldn't hear of it. Once Christian makes up his mind that he wants something he doesn't waste any time."

"And you're happy?" he asks.

"Of course. We are very happy. Why do you ask?"

"Just that you knew each other such a short time before you decided to get married. Then you had that trouble last year."

"Well. It didn't take us long to figure out that we loved each other. Then we didn't want to waste any more time being apart. And last year. Well, it was one of those bumps in the road. It happens if you let things go instead of talking about them." I give him a smile. "We've learned to talk about things. I never want us to get to the point we were last summer gain. "

"I learned that the hard way," he says. "That's why I'm looking at my second marriage. And why I only see my kids for a few months out of the year."

We hear the announcement of our descent into Sacramento and strap ourselves back in for the landing.

"That was quick." I remark.

"Yes. It's a short hop from Seattle to Sacramento."

After we land and taxi to the hanger, we disembark and the car Sawyer has procured for our use is waiting. He insists that we use it.

"Come on Paul. No sense in renting another car. We already have this one."

"Okay. I'll have one delivered to the hotel for use later."

Once at the hotel we get checked in and head up to our rooms. "Ana I hope you will be okay on your own this evening. I am sending the plane back for Suzanne. She wasn't able to fly out with us and so she will be coming in later this evening."

"Paul I'll be fine. I'll get settled in and actually there is a friend that I might meet for dinner."

As we get to our floor we go our separate ways Paul tells me, "I'll meet you in the lobby at eight in the morning and we can have breakfast before heading to the office."

"That sounds great. You and Suzanne have a pleasant evening."

After getting to the room, my phone buzzes and it's Sawyer just confirming my room and letting me know where he is.

Settling in, I suck it up and decide to let Virginia know that I am here.

"Mrs. Douglas, this is Mrs. Grey."

"Hello, Mrs. Grey. Did you have a pleasant trip?"

"Yes. Thank you. And you?" I ask.

"Yes. It was quite pleasant. I've settled into my room here at the hotel."

"Good. Then are you okay for dinner tonight?" I confirm.

"Yes Mrs. Grey. What do you have in mind?"

"Well, I thought maybe the restaurant here at the hotel. I had to bring a security person with me and I'd prefer not to have to go anywhere that he will have to follow us." I try to explain the choice of restaurant.

"I see. Shall we say eight o'clock in the dining room?"

"That sounds good. I'll call down and reserve a table." I tell her.

"Good. I'll see you at eight."

"Goodbye, Virginia."

Well that done, I guess I should call my husband and let him know I arrived safely before he puts a LowJack on me.

"Christian?"

"I miss you," he jumps in.

"Hi baby. I just wanted you to know I got here and I'm okay. Sawyer is here and checked in as well."

"I know. He reported in to Taylor. I miss you."

"Christian I've only been gone a couple of hours. We're apart longer than this when you go to work every day."

"I know. It's just the thought of you being two states away."

"Are you home yet?'"

"Yes. We have that Vet appointment in about an hour. Gail is going to watch Grace while Teddy and I take the dog in. Have I said I miss you?"

I can't help but laugh, "Yes sweetheart. I miss you too."

" I'm sure I'll miss you more when it comes time to go to bed," he whines.

"Well. I'll call you and we can talk before we go to sleep."

"Okay. What are you doing for dinner?" he asks. I'm sure he thinks I'll be dining with Paul.

"I'll probably just eat here at the hotel." It's not a lie.

"I thought the publishing king would try to take you out."

"No. Actually his fiancée is arriving later and he will probably dine with her."

"Fiancée huh?"

"Yes, sweetheart. Paul Sanders is spoken for. And he seems to be very happy about it."

"Well, I guess I feel a little better."

"Christian Grey. I'm going to get my feelings hurt if you don't stop that. I don't care what his status is. I'm married and I love my husband. It doesn't matter what he does, I'm only interested in you. You should never have any doubts about that."

"I don't baby. I'm teasing. Well half teasing. I trust you implicitly. I just don't want anyone trying anything. I'll kill anyone that touches you."

"Christian I know and don't worry. No one will get close enough to me to try anything. Now are we going to spend all our time on the phone talking about this nonsense?"

"No. I just miss you."

"Okay. We've been here before. I miss you too. Now go take the dog to the vet and I'll call you before I go to bed. I love you."

"Love you too, baby. Be careful."

"I will. Bye."

I have to chuckle to myself. That man may drive me insane one day, but I do love him. I think I'll order up some lunch since I won't be eating dinner until late. Stripping off my clothes I slide into my jeans and a big sweater and pile up on the bed with a book until lunch arrives. It's so quiet. I can't remember when it's been this quiet. No kids, no house staff, no husband. Just me and my comfy clothes, a big overstuffed bed and a good book. I'm just getting into my book when my lunch arrives and I scarf down my strawberry walnut salad and few pieces of the fresh bread. Returning to my book after lunch, I can hardly keep my eyes open. I mark my book and snuggle down for a short nap before my big evening.

* * *

Sitting alone at the table in the upscale restaurant my eyes nervously dart around looking for….for what? I called Sawyer and told him that he could relax as I was in for the evening; throwing him off my trail, I hope. Christian is in Seattle, I hope. My heart is beating out of my chest. Why am I doing this? What do I want to know? What do I want her to know? What have I done?

The waiter asks if I want to order a drink or something to eat. I explain that I am waiting for someone, but order a Hendricks and tonic to relax myself a bit. The waiter returns with my drink and a basket of freshly baked bread. It smells wonderful, but I take a sip of my drink instead and save the bread for later. I'm too nervous to think of eating. Looking up I see an older woman enter and stop at the maître d'. As he escorts her back, I recognize her from the pictures I've seen of her on the internet. Yes, I did my homework. I searched for everything I could find on her. Everything Christian told me seems to be the truth. Graduated from Bryn Mawr, married to a high profile attorney, lived in Oak Brook a suburb of Chicago, then after years of marriage, abruptly divorced her husband, had a daughter that disappeared and was later found to be deceased in Detroit, never remarried and no other children. I feel a little better seeing that the face matches the story.

I study her as she approaches my table. Medium height and a good figure for someone of her age, late seventies. Smartly dressed in a beige and cream knit suit. Black pumps and matching bag. A beautifully detailed gold necklace around her neck and gold earrings. A gold and diamond Cartier watch adorns her left wrist accompanied by a gold bracelet. Her white hair is in a smooth French twist at the back of her head and it accentuates her incredible blue eyes. I was hoping she would look more like Christian, but I don't see it. She reminds me of Grace; elegant, chic, sophisticated; someone obviously comfortable with money.

"Mrs. Grey?" she smiles down at me.

"Oh, yes. Mrs. Douglas. Please sit down." I motion to her chair. "It's so nice to meet you."

The maître d' pulls out her chair and seats her, then places her napkin in her lap. "Your waiter will be with you momentarily. May I get you something while you wait?"

"Yes. Martini, slightly dirty." She responds without breaking eye contact with me.

"Thank you." She smiles over at me, "Well, I must say you look exactly like your pictures, Mrs. Grey. You're very beautiful."

Okay, don't let her flatter you into a false sense of security. "Thank you, Virginia. And please call me Ana."

"Thank you, Ana. I can't tell you how pleased I am to finally meet you. It has been so long in coming." She smiles at me.

"Well, I have to confess I had my reservations about it. It's nothing against you. It's just that my husband's position makes us vulnerable to intrusions in our lives. We have to be careful about who we let in."

"I can well understand that. Money does come with its down side. It tends to send and out an open invitation to less than desirable people. One has to make certain with whom they are dealing." She smiles over as she takes a sip of her drink. "I assure you I don't need money, Ana."

"I see. So what is it you do want, Virginia?" I ask her. "Why did you want to meet me?"

"As I said before, I have tried for some time to get in touch with my grandson. I can't get past his front desk. He won't take any calls or make any appointments with me. Has he mentioned it to you?" She inquires of me as she stirs her drink with the olives on the food pick.

"No he hasn't. And I'm not surprised. Christian doesn't just talk to or meet with anyone unless he has a reason to," I tell her.

"I have followed him over the years, by private detective at first and then the internet has made it much easier. The world seems interested in anything and everything he does." She looks at me through her lashes as she sips her drink.

"Yes. Hard as we try, our private life seems to go public so often." I look down and stare into my gin and tonic. "Now, can you tell me, why now?"

"Mrs. Grey, Ana, I have reached an age that I know I have more of my life behind me than I have in front of me. My biggest regret is losing my daughter and my grandson."

"Then why did you never try to reach him over the years?" I ask her. "You do realize that he has never let you contact him because you abandoned him when he was little. He resents you for turning your back him and leaving him to suffer through terrible abuse and neglect," I try to explain.

"I…Ana, please let me explain," she sighs. " Perhaps it is best if I just tell you everything from the beginning. I think you have the wrong idea about what happened."

"Okay. But I need to be convinced that there is a damn good reason for what you did to him." I'm not giving her an inch. The thought of her abandoning him makes me want to slap her and walk out.

"Let me start at the beginning, please," she asks. "My husband, ex-husband, Phillip and I married just after he graduated from law school. We had everything, almost. We were in love. He had a bright future with the firm he joined. We had a beautiful home, money, position. What we didn't have was children." She has a pained look on her face. "We wanted them so badly. We tried everything. We saw every doctor, went through every procedure known at the time. No matter what we did… nothing. By the time we finally gave up we were well into our late twenties. Phil finally agreed to try adoption. I was ecstatic. We applied to every agency we could find. We didn't care if it was a boy or a girl, we just wanted a child." She looks up and past me, "We waited and waited. I didn't think we would ever be called." I see a smile break out across her face. "Then one day, it happened. I was at home and Phil was out on the golf course when it came. I couldn't wait for him to get home to tell him that we had a baby girl. A baby girl!" I can see her eyes well as she recalls it. "It took a couple of days and finally we got to meet her. Her mother was young, not married and was giving her up for adoption. We went to the hospital and I saw her through the glass all wrapped in pink with that pretty reddish hair. That's the first thing Phil noticed was that hair." She smiles recalling the story, "All I know is that she was mine from that very instant. We took her home the next day. I had been frantic to get the nursery done and all the supplies in for her. I couldn't take my eyes off of her. I was so afraid something would happen to her if I did. As though she would just disappear or something," she smiles as she stares down into her glass. "We had decided to name her Ellen Marie after his grandmother and my mother. Ellen Marie Douglas became my reason for living. She was the center of our lives, but I'm sure you understand that. How our children take over our hearts and become the reason for everything we do."

"Yes. I understand completely," I nod at her.

The waiter comes over and quickly takes our order. I want to get back to what Virginia is telling me.

"I felt that our lives were complete. We left our name on the lists for another child, but after we had Ella, we didn't push it. She was everything to us. We never got another call and we were okay with it. We had our Ella. Life was good. Phil's career just took off. He made full partner rather quickly. His name and face were everywhere. It's like we couldn't lose. Ella was such a smart little girl. Bright, pretty, inquisitive, nothing ever got past her," she smiles at me. "Phil was pleased that her hair began to darken. It finally became this beautiful chestnut mass of curls. Much the color of yours. And her eyes stayed the most beautiful blue. We had her learn to play the piano. She caught on so quickly and was able to play beautifully. But in spite of all of her talents, she was the most affectionate child. I can remember her just out of the blue, coming up to me one day and crawling in my lap and telling me she loved me. 'Mommy, I just love you so much it makes me hurt.' She would tell me," as she gazes into space and wipes her cheek, she tries to steady her trembling chin.

She works to clear her throat, "As she grew up, she became a handful. I'm sure she was spoiled. We treated her like a little princess. My beautiful little princess. We loved to shop and she never missed an opportunity. She adored clothes and as she became a teenager she spent most of her time with her hair and makeup. She was all girl. But she never neglected her school work. Always on the honor roll. She had planned to go to Harvard, that's where Phil had gone to school and that's where he insisted that she go. He never really asked her, he just more or less told her that's where she would go. I noticed that at about fifteen she started to become rebellious. That wasn't like her, but I assumed it was just those adolescent hormones. She wasn't allowed to date. Phil was very strict about that; almost unreasonably strict. I finally got him to agree to let her when she reached sixteen."

Our dinner arrives and we begin to eat and talk. "Anyway, things began to turn about that time. She seemed to resent everything we did. She didn't want to spend time with us anymore and she became almost slovenly, never washing her hair or cleaning her room. Her grades went into the toilet. God knows I tried to talk to her, but she would just blow me off. It wasn't like her at all. I finally found out that she had been secretly dating a young man from a neighboring school. He was older, a senior. I wasn't that happy about it but I didn't care as long as he was a good boy and respected Ella, but her father was a different story. I promised Ella that I wouldn't tell him. She was adamant about it. But things didn't improve. Finally one day I got a call from her pediatrician, Dr. Smithson. Ella had gone to her for years and she was close to Ella. She told me that Ella had come in and after examining her, she discovered that she was pregnant. I was horrified. After Phil came home I told him about Ella's boyfriend and that Ella was pregnant. He flew into a rage. I know I was upset about it, but he was just livid, almost out of control. I tried to calm him down before we talked to Ella.

"When Ella finally decided to come home that evening, we went into the den and sat down. I told her that Dr. Smithson had called and what she had told me. I'll never forget the look on Ella's face. She looked so betrayed. Then before I could stop it, Phil went into a rage. He was yelling and screaming at her, calling her every horrible name in the book. It broke my heart. I'd never seen him like that. Finally she lashed out at him and it all came tumbling out. She accused him of being jealous of Thomas. That was his name, her boyfriend, Thomas MC Andrew Christian. I was confused at first and then it all began to dawn on me. She looked over at me and told me what her father had done and had been doing to her for a while. I couldn't believe it. How could that happen? How could I not have known? How could he have touched her, his own daughter? How could he have done that to our child? I wanted to vomit. The thought of it just made me ill. I tried to hold her. I wanted to save her; to take her in my arms and never let anything hurt her again. But she just pulled away from me. She blamed me for not knowing."

All I can think of is Steve and Elena. How I felt. How Christian felt. How Ella must have felt. I can see she is so shaken recalling all of this, "I blamed myself for not knowing. I literally thought about killing Phillip, but at the time I was more concerned with my baby. Ella was so angry that she flew out of the door and got in her car and drove off. That's the last time I ever saw her. Phil and I separated immediately. I wanted him prosecuted, but he was so high profile and Ella wasn't there to accuse him or tell her side of the story. We eventually divorced, quietly. I was given a very large settlement to let him go without going to court with the divorce. There was nothing I could to him legally at the time. He went on to marry several more times; each new wife was younger than the last. It made me ill every time I had to hear his name.

"I searched for Ella for so long. I went to the police when she disappeared. I had a police detective working with me on the case. Detective Myers. He worked so hard on the case. He never gave up. When that didn't turn up much of anything, I hired a private detective. Actually I hired several. The one that stayed with me is the one that delivered the note to you. He has been with me and following Christian for years." She smiles as she eats her Coq au Vin. "Detective Myers found out that she had sold her car for cash a few weeks after she left. It wasn't in her name and she didn't have the registration so she couldn't have gotten more than a few dollars for it. She emptied her bank account before she left town. The trail went cold after that.

"I tried to find this Thomas that she had been dating. I thought maybe he had heard from her or knew where she was. We finally were able locate him. She had told him that she was pregnant and he wanted to get married. Evidently he was very much in love with her. And he wanted his child. He was so concerned about them. He was aware of the abuse and felt like she wouldn't marry him because of that, aside from the fact that she was too young.

"Wait. You mean that Christian's father was this Thomas?" I ask her.

"Yes. Who did you think it was?" she asks.

"Well, Christian is under the impression that your husband…" I can't bring myself to say it.

"Oh, God . No. Absolutely not." She insists. "Here." She pulls a photo from her purse. "Here is Christian's father." She hands me the photo and I almost gasp. I could be looking at a picture of my husband. "This is incredible. I've never seen two people look more alike," I tell her.

"I thought the same thing when I saw pictures of Christian. It's just uncanny isn't it?"

"May I keep this?" I ask her.

"Of course. I have other copies.

"Did Ella ever try to contact him?" I ask her.

"According to him, she called him once, but wouldn't tell him where she was. She did tell him that she had given birth to a boy and she had named him Christian. She started to give him up for adoption, but couldn't. She wanted to keep him. Not long after that Thomas was on his way to college and was killed in a car accident. He was riding with a friend and a truck ran a stop sign. The car was hit on the passenger side and he was killed instantly.

" I looked for Ella for years. Back then there were no computers and no data bases to search like there are now. Finally about six years later Detective Myers was working on another runaway case and he went to Detroit to track down a lead on her. While he was looking through some of the books they had compiled on runaways, he came across Ella's picture. He asked about her and they gave him the information. She had been found dead about two years earlier. Seems she had gotten hooked up with some fellow who gotten her into hard drugs and God only knows what else. The drugs eventually killed her. When he told me, I knew there had to be a child somewhere. Detective Myers learned that she had been found with a little boy of about four. Seems she had been dead for several days." I can see the tears spill out of her eyes as she calls this story.

"I was able to trace the child. I knew she had named him Christian. She used his father's last name. He had been placed with the state and then into a foster home for several months. He was then adopted out. I had his adoptive parents checked out. I understood them to be a pediatrician and an attorney. They had one other child, an adopted boy and were in the process of adopting another, a girl I believe. They seemed to be a very loving, well respected family. I know what it is to adopt a child and live in constant fear that blood relatives will show up and try to take them away from you. I knew that by this time Christian was bonded to them. As much as it ripped my heart out, I knew deep down that it was best for Christian to let him stay with the Grey's. He had loving parents and was well cared for. It would have been cruel for me to try to take him away from them, both for him and his adoptive parents.

"So I took things no farther. I left him to live with the Grey's, to have young parents and siblings rather than tearing his world apart and bringing him to be raised alone with an old woman. But I never lost him again. I've kept track of him since the day I found him. And now I want to know him. He's an adult and all I want is to know my grandson. He is all I have left in this world, Ana. And I love him."

"Well, that's quite a story. I will tell you that Christian has no love lost for you. When he lived with his mother he was starved, beaten, and neglected. He lived in filth and went without. His mother's 'friend' as you have called him, abused him terribly and he still bears the physical scars from it. He was left with his mother's dead body for days before her 'friend' ever bothered to report it."

I can see her clinch her eyes and cover her mouth as I tell her about her grandson. "Oh, dear God. No. I had no idea."

" Because of that, he grew up with terrible emotional scars as well. They were so severe that he ended up in another terribly abusive situation as a teenager." I can't help but to sound angry. " He resents you for leaving him in that situation for allowing him to suffer like that."

"But Ana, I didn't know. I would never have allowed that to happen. I wasn't able to find him until two years after Ella was dead. How could I have saved him from that?"

I nod. "Yes. I guess I understand a little better now. Virginia, Christian has known about you for years and he has chosen not to contact you. He doesn't know any of this. He doesn't know who his mother was or why he ended up like he did. I'm glad to learn that there is another side to this story. I would really like for Christian to know all of this. I think it would lift a very great weight from him. His past is the thing that has been his greatest burden. I would like for him to know that his father actually loved his mother and that it wasn't the person he assumes it to be."

"I can assure you that Thomas and Ella were very much in love. They were young, but they loved each other. I knew that after talking with Thomas. He adored my daughter. And he wanted to find them. He wanted his child so very much. I never want Christian to think that he wasn't loved or wanted."

"It makes me feel better to know that. Virginia, he is such a good man. You have no idea. He is kind and loving and giving. He adores his children and me. There isn't anything he wouldn't do or give up for us. Grace and Carrick were so good to him. They gave him everything and loved him so much. You did the right thing giving him to them. Do Thomas' parents know? I mean why did they never come looking for him?"

"Thomas never told them. At fifteen Ella was underage and he didn't want them to know. I never told them because I didn't want them to try to take him away from the Greys. I'm the only family that knows about him." She reaches in her purse, "Here. I want you to have this." She hands me a photo and I recognize the girl in the picture right away. She looks different than the photo on Christian's bulletin board. In this picture she is happy and carefree. She is beautiful, her long chestnut curls spilling over her shoulders and her smile lights up her face. I can see a lot of my daughter in her. "This was taken about a year before she ran away. I have others, but this is the only one I have a copy of. I'll be glad to copy any that you would like to have."

"Thank you. I appreciate this. Look, I will try to talk to Christian. I think he needs to know what really happened. But, he will look at this as me betraying him. He will know that I went behind his back. I have to try to figure out a way to do this. Christian and I don't lie to each other, we just don't. I won't jeopardize my marriage to do this." I try to explain to her. "Please don't try to contact him. Give me a chance to try to talk to him. I'm not sure if I can convince him, but I'll try."

"I understand. I wouldn't ask you to risk your relationship for this. I don't want to cause Christian any more pain. I just want him to know how much I love him and have wanted him."

"I'm here on business and won't be home for several more days, but I'll get in touch with you. I can't promise anything, but I'll see what I can do."

God I have no idea how I'm going to approach this. The waiter asks if we want dessert and we both decline, but I do order tea and Virginia orders a coffee, which the waiter brings straight away.

"Virginia, why do you think your husband did what he did to Ella? I mean did you have any indication that anything was wrong? I guess I just don't understand."

"I have no idea why. Phil and I had always had a good healthy relationship. He never went without if that's what you're asking. I never discussed it with him. I suppose he was just a closet pedophile and I never knew it. Actually I never really spoke to him again after that day. I mean I screamed at him and cursed him, but I never really had a conversation with him. There was nothing that he could say that I wanted to hear. I made him leave that day and we never slept under the same roof again. "

"I can't imagine. It must have been awful for you." I take a sip of my tea and think of the time Elena took Teddy.

"It's like my life began to move in slow motion. It was as if I was standing back watching it all happen to someone else. How could it possibly be my life? How could this happen?" she confesses.

"I can't imagine what I would do if anyone ever touched one of my children."

"You have a boy and a girl, is that right?"

"Yes. A boy that is seven and a girl three."

"I understand you lost a child several months ago," she asks.

Looking at her bewildered, "You seem to know an awful lot about us. I'm not sure I like that."

"I'm sorry I shouldn't have mentioned it. Like I said now days with the internet, nothing is private anymore."

"I know. Christian keeps trying to pound that into my head. I just hate not having a private life anymore. My privacy ended the day I met Christian." I smile down into my cup of tea. "From the day we met he knew everything about me. I think he knew more about me than I did about myself." I chuckle, "He even knew my bank account number and this was just days after we had met."

"You love him a great deal, don't you Ana?" she asks me.

" Why do you ask?"

"I can see it on your face when you talk about him," she says. "Your features soften and you can't help but smile. Your eyes almost search the room for him, even though he isn't here."

"We fell in love the instant we met. Neither of us had ever been in a serious relationship before. We were each other's first love." I shrug.

"Christian was in his late twenties wasn't he? And he had never been in a relationship? That's strange isn't it?" she asks.

"I guess for most men it would be. But Christian isn't like most men; far from it." I tell her. "He had issues. It was very difficult for him to trust anyone enough to allow himself to have feelings for them much less love them. He put all of his time into building his business. I think he had female companions, but nothing serious."

"Issues?" she asks.

I really don't want to tell her too much. "Um, yes. To be honest he has always felt like his mother took the easy way out and abandoned him by killing herself. And because of the abuse when he was little, he has a lot of trust issues and issues with relationships. It was difficult for him."

"But you were able to get through to him."

"Yes. It was like we needed each other and had all our lives. Once we found one another we couldn't walk away. It wasn't easy for either one of us, trying to make it work." I take another sip. "But we figured it out and I can't imagine ever being without him. I don't think we could survive if we were ever separated."

"I'm so glad that he is happy. That's really all I've ever wanted for him. To be happy."

"Well, Virginia, I hate to run, but I'm here on business and I have to be up early in the morning."

"Yes. I understand. Of course." She reaches across the table and puts her hand on mine. At first I want to move my hand but I don't. "Ana. Don't risk what you and Christian have to tell him about this. But if you do, and he still refuses to see me, please make sure he understands how much he was loved and wanted. He was conceived by two people who loved and wanted him very much. They were just too young and inexperienced to figure out how to do it. It was their fault not his."

I don't know what to say so I just smile and nod at her. "I will." I sign the bill and charge it to my room and we walk out of the restaurant and go our separate ways.

As I get on the elevator to go back up to my room and the doors close I catch a glimpse of Sawyer. Shit! I thought I had thrown him off the trail. What am I going to do now? I get off on my floor and stand by the elevator. In a few seconds the other elevator door opens and Sawyer walks out. He is startled that I'm waiting for him and we glare at each other for a second.

I motion my head to let him know to walk with me as I head to my room. "You were following me."

"Yes, ma'am."

"I thought I told you I was in for the evening."

"Yes, ma'am. You did."

"Then why the hell were you following me?" I ask.

"Because it's my job Mrs. Grey. To keep you safe. Ma'am, you never let me know that you are in for the evening, so when you called me, I knew right away that you were trying to throw me off a bit. "

"Sawyer, I wanted to be left alone. I wanted to visit with a friend and I didn't need security."

"Yes, ma'am."

"Will you stop with the 'yes ma'am'. I wanted some privacy."

"I understand completely Mrs. Grey. I'm here to protect you, Mrs. Grey, not invade your privacy or report on who you see. My report will say that you didn't leave the hotel the entire evening."

I give him a little smile, "Thank you Sawyer. I appreciate it. I understand the position you are in and I just need a little space sometimes."

"Understood, Mrs. Grey." He opens my door for me. "Have a pleasant evening Mrs. Grey. I'll see you in the morning."


	30. Chapter 30

_**Fifty Shades…Full Circle**_

_**Chapter 30**_

I make myself a cup of tea while I run a warm bath. What a day. I'm glad I met with Virginia. I'm glad to know what really happened. I want Christian to know how much he was loved, how much he has always been loved. That he has always been worthy of love. I have no idea how to go about it. I can take a risk and tell him, but then he will never trust me again. I think I'm the only person in the world he completely trusts and I can't risk that. But I want him to know the real story. He needs to know who his father is and he needs to know what a good wonderful person his mother was, not just this memory of what she had become.

Slipping into the warm water, I can't help but try to put myself in Ella's place. How awful for her. To be such a bright, beautiful carefree girl and then have your soul taken away by life's circumstances. But she loved Christian. She wanted Christian; she just couldn't take care of him. I imagine that he was her life raft. He was probably the only good thing in the world that she had to cling to. The only person that she had that she could give love to and the only person that gave her love in return.

He needs to know that even though she died, in the end, he did save her. She died loving him and knowing that he loved her. He needs to know that. I can't help but be overwhelmed by all the emotion and the tears roll down my cheeks. How awful and cruel life can be. How lucky I am. A few wrong turns and I could have ended up like Ella. But instead I have her Christian. I love and care for her Christian. Her Christian is safe with me.

After I finish my bath, I dry off and get on my gown and ready myself for bed. I need to call Christian. I know he'll still be up.

"Hi baby." I hear through the phone.

"Hi sweetheart." I try to sound cheerful.

"Baby are you okay?" he asks.

"Sure, why do you ask?"

"You just sound weepy, like you've been crying."

"No not really. I just miss you guys and was feeling a little down about it." I tell him. "How are the kids?"

"Kids are asleep and I'm missing you. I'm avoiding going to bed because you aren't there."

"Christian, that's silly. You need to get some rest."

"I know. I'm a grown man. Hey we took Jack to the vet today."

"Jack? You've named him?"

"Yeah. We had to call him something. The vet scanned him and said he didn't have a chip. After he examined him he said that the dog had been neglected. He was underweight, I think he weighed seven pounds and he should weigh about nine. And his nails were way overgrown and his hair was matted. He said he was probably a stray. We had the groomer bathe him and get him all cleaned up. He looks pretty good."

"Really? Then Teddy might be able to keep him?"

"Looks that way. The vet said that he was about a year old."

"Did he say what breed of dog he is, if any?"

"Well, he thinks he might be one of those designer type dogs."

"What's a designer dog?" I ask him.

"Well he said it's where they breed two purebred dogs and make a new breed. You know like a Golden Doodle or a Puggle or a Maltipoo."

"So what is Jack?"

"The vet said he looks like a Jack Russell and Affenpinscher. So you know what that makes him don't you?" I can hear him laughing.

"Oh, God."

"That's right. He's a Jack Aff." I can hear Christian cracking up over the phone.

I can't help but laugh with him, "Don't you dare say that to Teddy, Christian."

"I won't. I knew I liked this dog," he continues to laugh.

"Well I'm glad you're happy. So you named him Jack, because of the Jack Russell part?'

"I didn't. Teddy did."

"I don't know much about dogs, so what kind of dog is he?"

"Well the vet said Jack Russells and Affenpinschers are both terriers. The Russell is English and the Auffenpinscher is German. So I guess being half German and half English he argues with himself a lot," he laughs out loud again.

"Sweetheart, have you been drinking?"

"Shit no. This dog just cracks me up."

"I'm glad he has brought so much joy into your life." I can hear that he is just beside himself laughing. I wish I were there to laugh with him. He does it so rarely. "You seem to be in an awfully good mood. I wish I could be there." I get teary just missing him.

"Me too. I miss you. How did your day go?" he asks

"Okay I guess. After I talked to you I ordered up some lunch and settled down with a book. I haven't left the hotel. I'm supposed to meet Paul at eight in the morning to go over to the office and get the ball rolling," I tell him.

"Sweetheart, I miss you so much. I'm going to hate it every time you have to go down there."

"I know. But we've been apart before. You make business trips and I have to stay home without you. Besides we can spend the entire weekend together when I get home."

"If I didn't have the kids, I'd be on a plane and be there in an hour," he says.

"Speaking of kids, how are things going?" I ask.

"Fine. Fine. Teddy spends all his time with Jack and Grace has to be constantly watched. I'm afraid that if I leave her alone for any length of time she'll call the liquor store for a delivery."

"You've got her pegged. Well I guess I need to get some sleep and I know you need some yourself."

"Yep. I guess. I'm going in again in the morning and then try to work from home tomorrow afternoon, if I can manage it," he sighs. "Sweetheart, be careful and remember to eat. I didn't hear you mention eating any dinner."

"I did. I ate here at the hotel."

"Okay. I'll see you later this week and have a good first day."

"I will. Christian, I love you."

"I love you to Anastasia."

Gosh, I just miss him so much. I set the alarm and snuggle under the covers with my book. I can't keep my mind on the book. It keeps wandering back to Virginia and Ella and Christian. I don't hate her any more. I really think she did her best and did what was right for Christian. It took a lot of love for her to leave him with Grace and Carrick. It was the only real home he had known and he had a real family with them. He wouldn't have had Mia and Elliott if Virginia had taken him away from them.

* * *

When the alarm goes off I still have my book in my hand and the lights are still on. Damn I hate that. I never get a good night's sleep when I fall asleep like that. I hurry and shower and dress. I run into Paul on the elevator and we ride down to eat together.

Sawyer is right behind us and after we eat a quick breakfast we head out to the sidewalk to wait for the car to be brought around. As I'm talking to Paul I look over and notice a waif of a girl standing near the entrance to the hotel. She catches my eye because she almost reminds me of Leila. She is thin and pale. Her long dark hair is stringy and dirty, her clothes are unkempt and way too big. Our eyes meet for an instant and I give her a quick smile. She just nods her head. Paul and I enter the car with Sawyer in tow and head for the office.

Everyone is more than friendly and so welcoming. I'm immediately offered tea and a bagel, but refuse the bagel as we have just had breakfast. Paul starts me off in human resources with a nice middle aged woman who takes all my private information. I decline any type of insurance. Christian convinced me long ago that it was cheaper to just pay for services than gamble that we might need them. We can afford to pay for anything that might come up. After I am finished there, I meet with John, my new boss. He introduces me to Connie Patel my assistant. And then we sit down and go over expectations and assignments.

"So Ana, out of curiosity, why are you here?" he asks as he leans back in his chair. "I mean it's no secret who your husband is. What are you doing at our little publishing company?"

"Well first of all I wouldn't call it little. I worked for SIP which is now Grey Publishing. I started out as an assistant editor out of school and then moved to an editor position and then after a while I managed SIP. After we had our first child my husband and I decided that it would be best for me to stay at home and care for the baby for a while. Then we had another child and I wanted to get her to a certain age before returning to work. I have missed working and made the decision to dive back in and start back."

"But why South Atlantic?" he asks.

"I met Paul while visiting my mother in Savannah last year. He offered me a job, but at the time I wasn't in the position to return to work. When I finally decided to take the plunge, I thought of Paul and the offer was still open, so I took it."

"Won't you miss running the show, being in charge?" he asks.

"Absolutely not. I did it at Grey Publishing simply because my husband wanted me to. But it's not where my heart is. I don't like numbers and budgets and problems. I want to work with writers. I want to read and edit and work with creative people."

"Well. Okay then. I think we will be turning over a good stable of creative people to your capable hands. I know you haven't worked in a while, Ana, but you were quite well respected in your previous position. You handled some good authors and had a best seller or two as I recall. All I ask is that you keep what goes on here to yourself. I can't let you leak anything to Grey Publishing. I can't have our authors jumping ship and taking their work with them."

"You don't have to worry about that, John."

He gives me a smile. "Good. I'll let you spend the afternoon with Connie and work out the logistics on things. I think she has a few appointments scheduled for you. And, Ana, please don't hesitate to let me know if you need any help or if you just want to bounce ideas off of me. I'm here."

"Thank you John. I won't let you down." I stand and shake his hand. "And thank you for the opportunity."

After spending the afternoon with Connie I'm ready to go back to the hotel and slip into a hot bath and relax. I have forgotten how tiring an eight to five job can be.

Sawyer gets the car and brings it around and we head back to the hotel.

"Are you doing okay Luke?" I ask.

"Yes, ma'am. Is there a problem?"

"Oh, no. I know this has taken you away from home and I just want to make sure your room is comfortable and that you are getting enough to eat and enough sleep and that you have what you need."

"I'm just fine Mrs. Grey."

"Good. You'd tell me if you need anything wouldn't you?"

"Yes, ma'am. I would."

We arrive at the hotel and Sawyer lets me out while he parks and secures the car. As I walk to the door of the hotel I notice that strange girl is still outside the hotel. As I get closer to the door she gets up and walks toward me.

"Excuse me, ma'am."

I'm startled at first. I'm not used to people approaching me on the street. "Yes. Can I help you?"

She walks closer and looks rather timid, "Ma'am I was wondering if…"

Suddenly someone grabs my arm and drags me toward the door of the hotel. "Come with me Mrs. Grey." It's Sawyer.

"Luke what are you doing?" I ask as I'm dragged inside the door.

"Ma'am you shouldn't let strangers on the street approach you like that. You never know what they want or what they could do," he sighs. "Please don't do that again, ma'am."

I can see I've taken about ten years off of his life.

"Luke. I'm sorry. I just didn't think. She looked harmless and I…"

"Mrs. Grey. They always look harmless. We just don't need to take any chances. Please?"

I nod at him, "Okay. You're right. I'm sorry. I wasn't thinking. Thank you, Luke."

He escorts me all the way to my room this time. I guess he isn't taking any more chances.

Once in my room I run a bath and try to relax a bit. I'd love to get out and just take a walk and look around down town a little, but I know that is definitely off limits, especially at night. I guess I could make Sawyer follow me, but I hate to ask him to do that. I'll just order dinner up and relax and maybe read the paper before going to bed.

I call room service and order up a salad and a sandwich. I'll call Christian while I wait on it.

"Hey Sweetheart."

"Ana, baby. Hi. I miss you."

I have to laugh," I know. I know. I miss you too."

"So how did today go?" he asks.

"It went fine. I'm tired. I had forgotten how long eight to five can be."

"Yeah. It can be brutal just starting back," he says.

"I don't see how you do it all day and come home and then work until bedtime."

"I'm just used to it. I've always done it. I wouldn't know any other way."

"Well, I still think you need to take it easier."

"I'll tell you one thing, I'd rather work at GEH all day than keep track of these kids for a few hours."

I have to giggle," Are they getting to you? You know Gail will keep them if you are overwhelmed. We talked and she agreed to look after them in the evenings while I was gone."

"No. I'm a grown man. I handle thousands of employees every day and I should be able to handle a couple of small children for a few hours. Especially since they are my own kids."

"Suite yourself. It's not as easy as it sounds. Just don't let it get to you. You have back up available whenever you need it."

"What I need is you. That's an awfully big bed without you."

"You're the one who wanted the special order oversized bed."

"Well, I like the room to play when you are here, but it's a lot of empty space when you're gone."

"Just one more night, sweetheart. I'm hoping to get back Thursday evening. It's getting boring. Paul and Suzanne have kept pretty much to themselves. You know how it is to be young and in love."

"Not really. I know how it is to be old and horny, though."

"That's right. I keep forgetting how old you are. Just remember to use your cane when you try to walk."

"There's that smart mouth. If you were here I'd get that ass nice and pink."

"If I were there I'd let you."

"Don't get me started, Mrs. Grey. I may have to take things in hand."

"I have no problem with that, Mr. Grey. I wouldn't want you to be uncomfortable. Just think of me when you do."

"Baby, I can't think of anyone _but_ you."

"Okay. This conversation is deteriorating. Before I go how are the kids?"

"They are fine. I washed Grace's hair tonight."

"You did? How loud did she scream?"

"She didn't. She behaved herself and didn't put up a fuss."

"Okay Grey. What did you drug her with?"

"No, really she was very cooperative. She just loves her daddy."

"Right. I still say you drugged her. How is Teddy?"

"He's fine. I talked to him again about piano lessons."

"What did he say?"

"He still wants to play drums. He's going to learn piano, like it or not."

"Christian. If he doesn't want to, let's not make him."

"Ana, do you think any kid actually wants to take fucking piano lessons? Fuck no. But it's just the right thing to do. He'll be glad he did when he's grown."

"Well, we can discuss it when I get home. They are knocking on the door with my dinner. I need to go."

"Okay Sweetheart. Be careful and remember I love you."

"I love you too. Kiss the kids for me."

"I will baby."

After dinner I turn on the TV and grab the paper. It's mostly Sacramento news, naturally, but there are a few interesting articles. Thumbing through the 'local happenings' section I look through the museum exhibits and gallery openings. Shit! What the hell? There is an exhibit opening this weekend for one Leila Williams. She is having a showing at a local gallery. Get out the lube because Christian will shit a brick. A big, concrete, cinderblock brick.

Taking a few moments I read the article on her. Seems she is remarried, but still using the name William's as her professional name. She is living in Philadelphia and has been married to a bank executive for the past five years. Must be one kinky fucking banker. She has had exhibits in Chicago, Tucson, Dallas and now Sacramento. Good Lord her next one is in the Fall in Seattle. I hope Christian hasn't seen this. He threatened her pretty harshly years ago and warned her to stay on the other side of the universe. Lord, I can't believe we will have to deal with this. There is a picture of her and she looks really well. Actually sort of pretty. Her hair is still long and she has it darker with bangs. She actually has a smile on her face. She knows better than to come to Seattle, though. What is she thinking? Anyplace, but Seattle.

Well I hope she isn't in town yet. I have a suspicion she is if the opening is in four days. If I let Sawyer know, he'll tell Taylor who will tell Christian and then I'll have him to contend with. I'll just keep it under my hat and keep my eyes peeled.

Since I've been with Christian it is always something. Never a dull moment at Grey Manor. Enough of the paper. I toss it aside and pull up the covers after setting the alarm. I'm not falling asleep with the lights on tonight.

* * *

I find at the alarm and finally make contact with the off button. Opening my eyes I make myself crawl out of bed and hit the coffee pot to make a cup of tea. I get dressed and my make up on and then have a few minutes before I have to meet Paul to leave for the office. I decide to straighten up the room a bit and not leave it all for the maid to do. When I pick up the paper I remember Leila and wonder if she is in town. I hope the woman is deliriously happy and leaves us the fuck alone.

Finally I go downstairs to the restaurant and meet Paul for breakfast again before heading out.

As we wait for the car to take us to SAP, I glare over to see if the girl is waiting by the door in her usual place again. She isn't. I almost feel bad that Sawyer dragged me away. It was almost rude. We get in the car with the driver and Sawyer in the front seats and drive off to work.

"How is Suzanne?" I ask.

"She's fine. I would have asked you to dine with us last night but she has had a migraine and hasn't been feeling well.  
"Oh, Paul, I'm sorry to hear she hasn't been feeling well."

"Thank you. I think she is better, it's just the medication she has to take leaves her pretty wrung out afterwards. I'll check with her later this afternoon and if she's feeling up to it maybe we can get together this evening."

"That sounds nice. Actually I have just gone back to the hotel and collapsed in the evenings. I check in with Christian and the kids and then turn in."

"Are we wearing you out?" he asks.

"No. I love it. It's probably just getting used to a different routine. This can't be any harder than taking care of two small kids and a husband."

"I wouldn't think so. Well looks like we are here."

We are dropped off and enter the building. I spend the morning meeting with a few of the authors either in person or video conferencing. They are all very nice and cooperative except for Jeff Holden. This is his first book and he is stressing over each and every issue that comes up and changing editors mid-stream was not something he wanted to do. I suggest we get together in person and discuss any issues that the might have and I make sure he has my cell so he can contact me with any questions or concerns and that seems to smooth his feathers a bit.

Lunch time comes and John suggests that I take a stack of manuscripts and go back to the hotel and relax a bit and scan through them to familiarize myself with them. I don't argue. I would love to kick back and order some lunch and read through these.

Connie loads me down with the manuscripts and Sawyer helps me carry them as we head out to the car. When we reach the hotel, they drop me off at the front door and Sawyer tells me he will bring the manuscripts up to my room for me after they secure the car. As I exit the car I look over to the spot the girl usually occupies, but instead of the girl there is a young child. He's all by himself. God he can't be more than three or four. What is he doing here on a busy sidewalk by himself? I walk over to see about him.

"Sweetheart? Are you here by yourself?" I squat down to his level to talk to him.

He shakes his head. I'm immediately taken by his green eyes and he as the most beautiful light blonde hair. But he is filthy and he smells bad, poor little thing.

"Who are you hear with sweetie?" I ask him.

"Mama." He says as he looks up at me.

"Where is your mother?" I ask him.

"She go." He points somewhere and I look around and don't see anyone that looks like his mother.

"No sweetheart, don't eat that. That's dirty." I take what looks like an old previously eaten on partial sandwich away from him.

"NO! Hungy." He whines and reaches for the garbage I've taken away from him.

I take his hand and stand up, "Come on, baby. Let's go find your mother and get you something to eat." I start to walk back in the hotel and hear a voice behind me.


	31. Chapter 31

_**Fifty Shades…Full Circle**_

_**Chapter 31**_

**A/N: Again I want to thank all of you for following this story and for taking time to leave a comment/review. The reviews are how we authors know if anyone is still out there and if we should continue the story. I treasure each and every one of you and read every review. **

* * *

"Hey. Ma'am. That's my little boy. Tommy, come here."

I turn around to see the waif of a girl that has been at the hotel entrance.

"Oh, I'm sorry. He was here by himself. I didn't want anything to happen to him."

"I walked down there for a minute. I had something I needed to do." She puts her arm around the boy and moves him over to her.

"Okay. Well as long as he isn't unsupervised." I turn to walk back in the hotel.

"Excuse me. Ma'am?"

I turn back to look at her. She still looks awful; thin, dirty, unkempt. "Yes?"

"Look I hate to ask, but could you spare ten dollars?" she looks nervous and restless. "My kid here is hungry. I need to get him something to eat."

I know if I give her money it will probably go straight to drugs and the little boy won't see any of it. But the poor thing is obviously starving. "How about if I take you both and buy you some lunch. I think there is a diner down the street."

"Oh. Hey, I don't think so. Thanks anyway." She starts to turn and walk away with the child.

"Wait a minute." I try to stop her. "Look. If you'll let me buy both of you something to eat, I'll give you the ten dollars as well."

She looks down at the little boy and I think she realizes he needs to eat. She's probably hungry herself. "Okay. I guess that would be alright."

I sigh, "Good. Let's go down the street. Is the diner okay?"

"Hey lady, it's your show. Wherever."

As we walk down the sidewalk, I can hear footsteps coming up behind me at a run.

"Mrs. Grey" I can hear Sawyer trying to catch his breath. "Ma'am. We need to go back to the hotel."

"Well Sawyer. I'm taking these two to lunch. I'll go back to the hotel when we are finished."

"Ma'am. Mr. Grey won't…."

"Sawyer. I know what Mr. Grey will like and not like. I'll take full responsibility and you are welcome to come with us."

"Yes, ma'am. I'll come with you," he acquiesces.

We resume our trek to the diner and enter the establishment finding a booth to sit in. Sawyer finds a perch at the counter.

"So what is your name I ask her?"

"Uh. Lorna. It's Lorna." She says nervously. "And this here is Tommy, well Thomas." She nods in the child's direction.

The waitress brings us a couple of menus and three glasses of water. Tommy immediately grabs his water with both hands and begins to chug it.

I reach over and take his glass, "Hey sweetie. Not so fast." I can't tell if he is hungry or thirsty. "Well, please order whatever you want. I think I'm going to have a hot roast beef sandwich and some fries."

"Tommy, what are you hungry for?" I ask him.

He just shyly peers up at me through his lashes. His mother nudges him, "Tommy. What do you want to eat? Tell her."

He gives me a timid look from that dirty little face. "Shicken nugget?" he mumbles.

"Is chicken strips okay?" I ask and he nods. "Chicken strips it is. Do you want some french-fries or mashed potatoes too?" I ask.

"Finch fies." He gives me a timid nod.

"Would you like a glass of milk?" I ask and he nods and tries not to smile. This poor baby is so hungry.

We order and wait for our food. I can't take my eyes off this little boy. I want to take him home and give him a warm bath and put him in some clean clothes. I want to get the cigarette smell off of him and put some decent shoes on his feet.

"So Lorna, what do you do?" I ask trying to make conversation.

She shrugs, "This and that. I've been out of work mostly."

"How old are you sweetheart?" I ask. She can't be more than eighteen or nineteen.

"Eighteen. I'm eighteen."

"And Tommy? How old is he."

"He's three and a half." She turns and rubs his head, "Aren't you? You're a big boy."

Tommy grins and shows off the cutest dimples in his cheeks. "Uh huh."

Lunch arrives and Tommy dives in to his chicken strips almost inhaling them. Lorna barely picks at her food.

"Aren't you hungry?" I ask her.

"I'm not feeling too good today. Cramps." She shrugs.

"Oh, I'm sorry. Can I get you anything for them?"

"Whatcha' got?" she perks up.

"Um, well I have some Naprosyn." I start to reach for my purse.

"Oh, that's okay. They don't work for me anyway," she says looking disappointed.

"What's your name?" she asks.

"It's Ana."

"Do you live here, Ana?" she asks.

"No actually, I'm here on business. I live in Seattle."

"You got family there?" she asks.

"Yes. I do." Not too much information. _Don't give her too much_, I tell myself.

"You got a husband and kids?"

"Yes I do." I tell her. "I have a son and a daughter about Tommy's age."

"Yeah. You looked like you would." She tells me. "You got that married with kids, playing bridge on Thursdays look."

"Oh, really? Well I don't play bridge." I tell her.

"What kinda' work you do?" she asks.

"I'm a book editor."

"Wow. You must be smart. You musta' went to college and everything, huh?" she says.

"Yes. College and everything."

"Did you finish school Lorna?" I ask.

"Na. I got pregnant with him and quit."

"Do your parents live here in Sacramento?"

"Nope. I came out here with his dad," she nods at Thomas, "but things didn't work out. He took off."

"Do you know where he is?"

"No. Good riddance. He turned out to be not so good."

"What do you mean?" I ask her.

"He was into a bunch of stuff, you know. He was always takin' the rent money or the money for his milk. After I had Tommy he sort of lost interest. He split about a year and a half ago."

"Does he help take care of Thomas?" I ask her knowing the answer.

"No. Ain't heard from him since he left. It's just me and old Tommy here now." She looks at her son devouring his fries.

"Are those good Tommy?" I ask.

He grins and nods yes.

"Do your parents help you at all?" I ask her.

"Nope. They pretty much kicked me out after I got pregnant. They don't want nuthin' to do with us."

"I'm sorry. Honey, do you have anyone to help you?" I feel so sorry for this kid.

"Na. But Tommy and me, we do alright. Don't we kid?" she smiles over at the boy.

He grins and gives her a big nod. "Yep," as he stuffs the fries into his mouth.

"Lady, I mean Ana. Thanks for givin' him something to eat. Things have been sort of rough lately and I haven't had too much." I can see tears welling in her eyes. "Sometimes I just can't take care of him like I want to, ya know?" she wipes her cheeks. As she does her exposed arm tells the story as I observe the scars and bruising.

"I understand. Look. This may sound strange, but I want to give you my number. If Tommy ever needs anything I want you to call me. I mean it. Don't let him be hungry or sick and go without."

I take a business card out of my purse and scratch my cell number on it and push it over to her.

She picks it up and inspects it. "Ana Grey." She looks back at me, "Look Ana Grey, I don't want to bother anyone and I don't need any help. But thanks anyway."

"Lorna. Please do it for Tommy. Look I know someone who was once in the same position and could have used some help. But they didn't get it. Please let me help if I can."

She puts the card in her pocket, "I'll think about it."

"Okay. Just please keep the card and call me if he needs anything."

She shrugs. "Tommy would you like some ice cream?" I ask him.

He breaks out in a huge grin and nods yes.

"What kind of ice cream do you want?"

"Banilla."

"Vanilla it is then." I call the waitress and order his ice cream.

After we finish I pay the bill and slip twenty dollars into Lorna's hand. "Please call if he needs anything."

"Sure Ana. Sure." She says as she and Tommy head down the sidewalk.

Tommy is holding his mother's hand, but stops and turns around to wave at me, "Bye-bye Wady."

"Bye Tommy," I give him a little wave. I want to cry for both of them. Life is just so damned unfair sometimes. Sawyer and I walk back to the hotel in silence.

"Thanks Luke. I just needed to make sure the child got something to eat."

"Yes, Mrs. Grey."

As we enter the lobby Sawyer heads to the desk and collects the stack of manuscripts that he quickly left there. He walks me to my room and carries them in and places them on the table for me.

"Anything else Mrs. Grey?"

"No. Thanks Luke. Go get some rest. I'm going to read through these and order some dinner up later. And this time I mean it. I'm in for the night." I give him a smile and a pat on his shoulder.

He turns to leave and stops, "You did a good thing, Mrs. Grey. With the kid and all. It was a good thing."

I give him a smile and close the door behind him. I want to hug my kids. I want to hold my husband. I can't imagine how I would feel if Teddy and Grace were hungry and I couldn't get food for them. As I kick my shoes off and unzip my dress to get back in my jeans and sweater, my phone rings. It's Paul.

"Hey Ana. Look, Susie is feeling so much better and we were wondering if you want to join us for dinner this evening. It's our last night here and I'd like for you to meet her."

"Well that would be nice. I'd like to meet her." I tell him.

"Good. We'll eat somewhere other than the restaurant here. I'm sure you're tired of hotel food by now."

"That sounds great. What time?"

"Why don't you meet us in the lobby about seven thirty."

"Okay, Paul, thanks. And I'm glad Susie is feeling better."

"Great. I'll let you get back to your reading. See you at seven thirty."

I guess I'll give Christian a call. Should I mention Lorna and Tommy? He will go ballistic if he finds out I took a stranger to lunch. But then I had Sawyer with me the entire time. I wasn't in any danger. I'll see how it goes.

"Hi Sweetheart. I miss you. How's your day going?" he asks

"Hi Christian. It's going okay. I have a stack of manuscripts to look over, so I came back to the hotel to do it in quiet. How's your day been?"

"Okay. I had back to back meetings all morning. I tried to cram in as many as I could so I could get home to the kids. Do you know when you'll be coming home?" he asks.

"Probably tomorrow evening. At least that's what I'm planning on? How are my children?"

"Fine. Teddy is still in puppy love. Grace thinks JackO is a baby doll and tries to put clothes on him." I can hear him chuckle, "And poor JackO is tolerating all the attention fairly well."

"Why JackO instead of Jack?" I ask.

"It's short for Jack Off."

"Christian you _cannot _call that dog Jack Off."

"I know. But I thought JackO fit. Wait 'till you see him he looks like a JackO."

"You are incorrigible. Are you still at the office?" I ask.

"No, I'm in the car on the way home. Should be there in a few minutes."

"Well I'm going to dinner with Paul and Suzanne this evening, but I'll call you when we get back. I don't want you to worry if I don't call you until later this evening."

"Okay. I can't wait for you to get back, Sweetheart."

"Are the kids driving you that crazy?"

"What a thing to say about my children, Mrs. Grey. And yes they are driving me crazy."

"I thought so. Hey, did Liz get the bedroom finished?"

"Yep. It was finished Monday afternoon."

"How does it look?" I ask him.

"Like a bedroom."

"Okay JackO. You know what I mean."

"It looks nice. Just like the rest of our house. House by Liz."

"Is the bed okay?" I ask him.

"I don't know. It looks fine, but I'm waiting on you to sleep in it. We need to christen it. I've been sleeping in the guest room."

"Christian, we've christened every bed in that house except for Grace's crib. I had to put my foot down on that one." I chide him. "We'll, I'll let you get back to your phone calls. I know you can't stay away from them for very long."

"Okay. I do have a few to return. You have a good dinner with the Publishing King and call me before you go to bed."

"I will sweetheart. Kiss my kids."

"If I can get them to hold still long enough, I will. Bye Baby."

"Bye Christian."

I grab a cup of tea and prop several pillows behind my back and start to look over the manuscripts. Thumbing through them I can't really keep my mind on them long enough to gain any interest. I keep going back to Lorna and Thomas. He was so precious and so neglected. No child should have to live like that. Lorna hardly ate any lunch. As thin and as strung out looking as she is, I know she has to be doing some hard stuff. Especially after seeing that arm of hers. I wonder if that's how Ella looked? I wish I could help her, if not for herself, then for Tommy. He shouldn't have to live like that.

He was just so striking looking. Those green eyes surrounded by those dark lashes and the blond hair. Gosh and those little dimples. He could grow up to be something if he just had half a chance. I hope nothing happens to him. I can't keep my mind on these manuscripts. I finally just put them down and try to rest a bit before getting ready for dinner.

After a quick nap, I wake and just lie on the bed and stare at the ceiling_. _What a trip. Meeting with Virginia, my run in with the waif and Tommy, and now Leila in town. All of this on top of a new job. Christian will never let me out of his sight again. As much as I miss him right now, that sounds pretty good to me. I guess I need to call Sawyer and let him know about dinner. He really is a sweet guy.

I dial scan through and find the number for Sawyer and give him a call. "Hi Luke. Mrs. Grey."

"Yes ma'am?"

"I hate to do this to you, but I will be going out for dinner with Mr. Sanders and his fiancée. We'll meet in the lobby at seven thirty."

"Yes ma'am. I'll be there."

"Oh, I'm not sure where we are going, but you probably need to wear a tie and jacket, just in case."

"Will do Mrs. Grey. Lobby. Seven thirty."

"Thank you Luke."

After dressing ….again, I make sure I have everything and head to the lobby to meet Paul and Suzanne. Having a seat I find myself looking around like I'm going to find someone lurking in the shadows, waiting to jump out at me. Why , I don't know. Probably too much going on. Paul and Suzanne exit the elevator arm in arm. Wonder if they ever have sex in the elevator. Surely Christian can't be the only man who gets excited in elevators. But then my husband gets excited pretty much where ever he is.

"Ana. I'd like you to meet my fiancée. This is Susie. Susie, this is Ana Grey." She's quite pretty, but then Paul is very good looking. She is petite, slender, very blonde. Her complexion is flawless and her dress is very upscale. "It's so nice to meet you, Susie. I hope you are feeling better." I can't help but feel like I've met her somewhere. I just can't place her.

A timid smile flashes across her face and she looks over at Paul with a little grin. Yep. I didn't think a headache was involved. "I'm much better thank you. And actually it's Susannah. Paul always calls me Suzanne or Susie." She replies looking over at him with a smile.

"Well ladies, lets away to the restaurant," Paul smiles and takes both of our arms. We walk out to the waiting limo that Paul has rented and slide in back, while Sawyer gets up front with the driver.

As we take off Paul looks over at me, "Oh, Ana. I hope you don't mind. We need to make a stop on the way to dinner. Susie has a good friend that is an artist and she has a show opening here Friday. Susie wanted to stop by and say hello and take a look at her latest paintings."

"Would it be Leila Williams?" I ask as my entire body goes rigid. I knew I had met this woman before. She's changed her hair color to blonde, but it's Susannah. FUCK!

"Yes. Do you know her?" he asks. _Shit yes I know her._

"No. Not really. I was reading the paper and saw the article earlier. Susannah how do you know Ms. Williams?" I ask. I know she knows who I am.

"Oh. It was before she married her husband, and before I met Paul. We are about the same age and both single. I had seen some of her work and really liked it. We actually met through a mutual friend. We just hit it off."

"I see. You must have a lot in common." _I wonder just what Susannah is up to_?

"Yes, Ana, actually we do. I'm just so happy that she is getting the recognition that she deserves. Her work is just fantastic. She has had a lot of disappointment in her life and I'm glad she is finally doing so well," she tells me.

"Good. I'm glad to hear it," I tell her. As the car comes to a stop in front of the gallery, Paul and Susie slide out. I keep frozen to my seat.

"Ana? Are you coming?" Paul asks.

"Actually I think I'll just wait here for you. Go enjoy," I tell him.

"Oh, come on Ana," Susie adds. "I'm sure Leila would love to meet you."

"Oh, I hate to intrude." I can hear my phone ringing, "Besides I need to answer this. It's my husband," I tell them.

"Well talk to him and then come on in," Paul says.

"Okay." I answer my phone. "Christian."

"Ana? Where the fuck are you?" he asks.

"I'm in a limo waiting for Paul and his fiancée to meet a friend of hers," I tell him.

"Sawyer just called. He said you were outside a gallery that has an exhibit by Leila Williams."

"Yes. That's right." I tell him. "Christian I had no idea. I had read that she was having a show here this weekend in the local paper, but I had no idea that Paul's fiancée was Susannah and that we would be stopping at the gallery."

"FUCK!" I can see him now, running his hand through his hair. "Susannah _and _Leila?"

"Sweetheart. It may be okay. Susie is acting like she doesn't know me and I've been playing along. And I didn't go in the gallery with them. I'm still out in the car. Sawyer is with me."

" He just spoke with Taylor. Look have the car take you back to the hotel. Just get the hell out of the situation. Do you hear me?" he says almost hysterically.

"Sweetheart. I can't do that. Everything seems to be okay. Neither of us has let Paul know that we know each other. I think I can get through dinner fine. Sawyer will be with me." I try to calm him down.  
"Ana. Listen to me. I want you out of there," he is almost shouting at me.

"Yes, Christian I hear you. I just can't get out of this gracefully right now. Look they are coming out to the car. I'll call you later. I can handle this. Really I can." I reassure him.

"Ana Grey. Are you fucking listening to me?" he is shouting now.

"Yes. I am. Please just let me handle this. Okay?" I try to calm him down. "They're at the car. I have to go. I'll call you when I get in. I love you. Don't worry."

"Fuck, Ana don't you dare hang…." I cut him off and hang up. Yeah, yeah I know don't hang up on you.

My phone rings again as they slide back into the car. "You missed some really great stuff," Paul says.

"I'm sure I did." I look at my phone and it is Christian…again. I can't deal with this right now.

"We're going to wait a minute. Leila has agreed to join us for dinner," Paul tells me.

Oh my God. This just gets fucking better and better.

* * *

**A/N: I have had several new readers ask me questions about this story, but didn't log in so I have no way to send you an answer.**

** 1.)Yes, I am still working on this story. It is not finished.**

**2.)I usually try to post new chapters at least twice a week, usually on Wed. evening and Sat. If you set up an alert, you will get an email advising of each new post. Thanks again.**


	32. Chapter 32

_**Fifty Shades…Full Circle**_

_**Chapter 32**_

**A/N: Even though they've grown and matured over the years, Ana is still Ana and bless his controlling little heart, Christian is still Christian. Thanks for the reviews. It's nice to know you are still hanging in there.**

* * *

Maybe I do need to find a way to get out of this. "Paul, actually I'm not feeling well. Maybe I'll just have the driver take me back to the hotel."

"Nonsense. You're just tired. It's been a long week. You'll feel better when you eat," he says.

"Yes, Ana. Please. I think you'll enjoy seeing Leila. She really is a lot of fun," Susie pressures me.

The window between the driver and us slides down and Sawyer looks back at us, "Mrs. Grey, I'll accompany you back to the hotel, Ma'am."

"Thank you Sawyer….. I think I'll be okay. I appreciate the offer."

"But ma'am. If you aren't well, I think Mr. Grey would prefer that you to return to the hotel," he says sternly.

"Sawyer. I'm fine," I repeat as sternly. He raises the dividing glass and I can see the hint of a smile on Susannah's face and I know what she's thinking. _I'm not his sub, damn you. I'm his wife. He doesn't control me and I don't jump every time he tells me to._

The dividing window slides down again and Sawyer interrupts, "Excuse me ma'am. Mr. Grey is on the phone. He'd like to speak with you."

_Yes. I guess he does._ "Thank you Sawyer." I plaster a smile on my face.

"Hello Sweetheart."

"Don't sweetheart me. You hung up on me, " he rants into the phone.

"I must have accidentally turned my phone off. What's going on?" I try to act nonchalant.

"You know very well, what's going on. I want you to go back to that fucking hotel. Now."

"Well, I'm fine. Sawyer is with me. We are just on our way to dinner. How are the kids?"

"Ana Grey. Are you listening to me?" I can tell he is on the verge of a melt- down.

"Yes. I am. I've run into a couple of friends of yours. Leila and Susie. They said to tell you 'hello' and wish you were here, sweetheart."

"I don't give a flying fuck what they want. I want you out of there. Do you understand me or do I have to come and get you? And you know I fucking will."

"Yes, I know you will, but it's not necessary. I'll be home tomorrow." I'm trying to calm him down and at the same time not let on what our conversation is really about.

"Stop playing games with me. I don't like this. Not one fucking little bit."

"I know. I miss you too. I'll call you after dinner when I'm back at the hotel. Kiss the kids and I'll talk to you later."

"Ana. You fucking listen to me."

"Bye Sweetheart." I hand the phone up to Sawyer. "Thank you Luke."

"Ana, if you think your husband would prefer that you go back to the hotel, I certainly understand. I know I certainly like to please Paul." She looks at him and places her hand on his thigh.

"No. Really, I'm fine. I was just getting the beginning of a headache. I think eating might be good." I tell them determined not to let Susannah think that I obey Christian. Which I don't, at least outside of the bedroom.

Just as I'm beginning to collect myself, the car door opens and the lively face of Leila Williams enters. She looks so much better than I remembered. Her hair is darker almost black. It is pulled back in a sleek ponytail with short cut bangs. She really looks very East coast. Red lipstick, but then she always wore it according to Christian, pale complexion, dark rimmed glasses. She is thin and dressed in a white blouse and black pencil skirt with a black cardigan.

"Hi. Thanks for inviting me to dinner," she smiles at everyone.

"Leila, this is Ana Grey. Her mother and stepfather are friends of mine and she has just taken a position as an editor with my company," Paul introduces us.

"Yes. Ana. It's been a while. You are looking well," Leila says smiling at me.

"Leila? You two know each other?" Paul asks.

"Yes." She says with a smile." I was a friend of her husband years ago. We met not long after she and Mr. Grey, Christian, got married," Leila tells him.

"Oh. Small world. How about that?" he says. Turning to Susie," Sweetheart, did you know that Leila and Ana knew each other?" he asks.

"Actually, after I met Ana this evening, I remembered that they had met years ago," she says.

Paul looks uncomfortable. I believe the situation is beginning to sink in.

"Well. I guess we all know each other then," he gives me an uncomfortable smile. "It's a shame Christian can't be here as well."

_On no Paul. No, it's not a shame. It's a God send that he isn't here. You_ _have no idea_.

"Yes. It would be nice to see Christian again," Leila adds. "How is he?"

"He's good."

"I've seen the news items on him over the past year. I heard he had been shot? Is doing okay?" she asks me.

"Yes. Yes. He's fine." I tell her.

"And that incident in Colombia. That must have been awful. I can't imagine."

"Yes. It was a trying few days, but he made it home just fine," I tell her.

"I'm glad. It's nice to see you again, Ana."

"Thank you, Leila. You are looking well." I tell her. I'm so uncomfortable that I want to jump out of my skin. All I want to do is escape from this car. I'm sure Paul has no idea what is going on and I'm trying my best to keep a lid on things. I just want him to think that this is just a case of old friends running into each other. If I can just get through dinner. I hope this restaurant is quick and not one of those leisurely dining experiences.

"I understand that you remarried, Leila."

"Yes. I met Jefferson when I was in Philadelphia visiting a friend. He's a banker and he's just the best. We've been married about five years now. I'm very, very happy, Ana. Really." She gives me a look that lets me know she's trying to convince me she's okay.

"That's good. I'm happy things worked out for you Leila."

Arriving at the restaurant, I can tell this won't be quick. It looks very expensive and that means an evening of leisurely fine dining. As we exit the car, Sawyer takes me by the elbow, "Ma'am. Mr. Grey will not like this. Please let me take you back to the hotel."

"Sawyer, I know. But right now I need to do this. I know you'll take care of me and I'm not worried. And order whatever you want for dinner. I'll make sure it's taken care of. You don't have to expense it."

"Ma'am, I'm not worried about paying for dinner. I need to get you away from here. Mr. Grey will string me up and skin me alive, and that's if he is in a generous mood."

"It will be okay. I'll make sure of it. This will just take a couple of hours and be over with. Then we'll be on our way back to Seattle tomorrow. Try to relax a bit."

"I can't make you leave, Mrs. Grey, but Mr. Grey will not be happy." He looks a bit pale and diaphoretic.

"I know. I'm dreading him more than I am the situation waiting for me inside. But, we'll be okay. Just hang in there," I try to reassure him but I know it's not working.

Entering the restaurant we are seated at a lovely table and Paul orders a nice bottle of Dom Pérignon. I'm relaxing a bit. Susie and Leila are giggling away and enjoying their reunion. Paul and I are deep in editorial conversation. Sawyer hasn't wet his pants yet. So all in all, the evening isn't too bad. Dinner is taking forever; 'not prepared until you order it'. We've been here about an hour and a half drinking champagne and eating hors d'oeuvres. Susie and Leila look really happy and settled. I think they have finally found what they are looking for in life.

Paul leans in to talk to me, "Ana. I'm so sorry if this is uncomfortable for you. I had no idea that you knew Susie and Leila. Susie never mentioned it."

"That's okay. I will admit I was pretty uncomfortable at first, but I guess occasionally a wife is going to run into her husband's old girlfriends ." I try to reassure him.

"I don't think I ever told Susie your last name. She probably had no idea either. She knew Bob's last name. I guess she never thought about the new editor I hired being married to Christian Grey."

"I understand. I didn't recognize her either when you introduced us. She's changed her hair color and it has been eight years since I last saw her. I know you wouldn't have put me in an awkward position on purpose. I have a feeling Christian isn't going to be too happy about it though."

"I can't say that I blame him. I would have a stroke if my wife had dinner with two of my old girlfriends," he chuckles.

"The last time I saw Leila, she wasn't well at all. She and Christian didn't end on a good note and I think she wasn't happy when he married me. It's nice to see her doing well," I tell him.

"Susie said that she had some sort of breakdown a few years ago."

"Yes. She was pretty pitiful. She looks like a different person now."

As we look over at them, I can see the color drain from Leila's face. "Shit." She mouths.

"Hello sweetheart." I feel someone kiss me on the cheek.

"Damn." I about jump out of my skin. Looking up I see Christian. I knew he would have a conniption fit, but I had no idea he would actually show up.

"Christian, what are you doing here?" I'm about to either faint or mess my pants.

"After we talked, I realized I missed you, so I hopped in the plane," he shrugs, "here I am."

"Yes, so I see."

Paul stands up and extends his hand. "Christian. Nice to see you. Please have a seat." He motions to the waiter to bring another chair and place setting.

"Really I didn't mean to interrupt. I just came to surprise my wife," he says.

"And believe me, I _am_ surprised." I tell him as he unbuttons his jacket and sits down between Paul and me.

"Ladies. Nice to see you again." He nods at Susie and Leila.

"Christian. It's been ages. You look well." Leila says. I can tell neither Leila nor Christian are comfortable with her calling him by his given name.

"Yes, sweetheart. Leila has been telling me that she has been married about five years now. And Susie is engaged to Paul. Isn't it a strange coincidence that we all ended up here together?" I ask nervously.

"Yes. It's a very strange coincidence." Christian looks like he wants to strangle Leila. He leans back in his chair. As the waiter goes to pour him a glass of champagne, he waves him away and orders Hendricks and tonic instead. Then he quickly places a dinner order that won't take too long, since ours is almost ready."

"Sweetheart, it was nice of you to make the trip down, but I told you I would be home tomorrow."

"I know baby, but I just couldn't be away from you one more day." I can tell this isn't really a romantic conversation, but a test of wills.

"Well I'm glad to see you. I would introduce you, but I guess you already know everybody."

Christian leans in, "Where's Sawyer?" he asks.

"In a corner somewhere, on his knees making the sign of the cross, I imagine."

"And well he should be," he murmurs.

"Did he call you? Is that how you found us?" I whisper.

"Actually yes. When he told Taylor that he couldn't get you to leave, I got in the plane and flew down."

"Christian, really. I think everything is okay. Both of them look fine. I think Leila is really okay this time."

"That's not the point. We'll discuss it later."

God I feel a major argument looming. I really hoped that this would be a nice quiet trip. No such luck.

Dinner arrives and we settle in to eating our meal. All seems to be going well. Christian hasn't erupted yet. Sawyer and Taylor are at the bar having a discussion. God only knows what they are saying.

Leila and Susie are still giggling away. This is so different than the last time all of us were in a room together. I thought Christian was going to kill them both. Paul and Christian are discussing business and I jump in occasionally. After we finish, I stand and excuse myself to the ladies room.

"We'll join you," Susie says.

Well fuck. Just what I wanted; to be alone with them. Christian grabs my hand and I know he doesn't want me to go, but how do I get out of it? I was the one who said I had to go. The three of us take off across the dining room and hit the ladies room. After I finish in the stall, I don't want to come out. Wonder if I can stay in here until they leave? Maybe I can wait them out. Crap, if I sit here any longer I'm going to get a hemorrhoid. I finally pull myself together and go out to wash up.

When I look up in the mirror, I see Leila standing behind me and it startles me. "Ana. I know this must be uncomfortable for you."

"Leila, you have no idea," I tell her as I wash my hands.

"I wanted a chance to apologize for the first time we met. I was ill. I know that. Life…..well, it had just become more than I could deal with. I couldn't take care of myself. I needed for someone to just take me in and make all my decisions for me; take care of me. I knew Mr. Grey had taken care of me before and I was looking for him to do it again. I needed for someone to love me; to care about me. I just didn't realize that he had found a different kind of relationship. I didn't know that he could find one. I want him to know that I'm sorry and that I appreciate everything that he did for me. Will you tell him for me?"

"Leila, you don't have to explain. I know you were ill. I'm just glad that you seem so much better now. You seem happy. I'll make sure Mr. Grey understands that."

"Oh, yes. I am very happy. I am very much in love with my husband. For the first time in my life I am in a relationship where I am an equal partner. It's a whole new experience for me. You and Christian look happy."

"We are. Very. Well this has been a very awkward evening to say the least." I say as I dry my hands.

"Yes it has. I know why Christian is here. I hope you aren't in trouble."

"Leila, he may be angry but, he'll get over it ….eventually. I don't really get into trouble. We just discuss things when they come up."

"I know he told me to never come back again, or he'd cut me off, but I don't need him anymore. I can take care of myself now. I can go wherever I want to. He can't tell me what to do anymore."

"I'm glad to hear you say that," I tell her and give her a smile.

"You are?" she looks confused.

"Yes. You are your own person. At the end of the day, you don't have to answer to anyone but yourself. Just make sure you stay healthy." I tell her. "How are Paul and Susie?"

"They are good. I think she is really in love with him. She's come a long way. She went back to school and got her degree. She's doing well."

I put my hands on her upper arms and look directly at her. "I'm happy for both of you. We have all moved on to better places and I hope we all stay there."

We walk back to the table and Christian is looking a bit nervous. Susie has already returned and is cuddled up to Paul. When we sit back down we talk for a few more minutes before Christian announces it's time for us to get back to the hotel.

"Before we all go, I'd like to toast," Leila says. We look a little confused but all pick up our glasses.

"To better places and better times." Leila proposes and out of courtesy we all agree and drain what's left in our glasses.

"Paul, I'll take Ana with me if that's okay. I have a car and driver," Christian says as he stands up.

"That's fine. You two haven't seen each other in several days. I'm sure you have a lot to talk about," he grins.

"We definitely have a lot to talk about," he says as he heads me toward the door.

"I believe Susie and I have a few things to discuss as well." Paul looks a bit perturbed.

Christian and I walk outside and say our goodbyes to everyone. Leila walks over to hug Christian, but he backs up and extends his hand instead, "Leila, best of luck with your showing."

"Thank you Christian. I'm truly happy that things have turned out the way they did. Goodbye."

This time I really believe she means it. I hope Christian takes this with the good intentions Leila is offering it.

Christian and I slide in the back of a black SUV with Taylor and Sawyer in the front. We ride in silence back to the hotel until I decide to speak. "Leila looked good, didn't she?"

Christian shrugs, but doesn't say anything. Okay. I was testing the waters and they are pretty rough. "I mean I think she is really happy. I think things have turned around for her."

"Ana, I really don't care about Leila. Or Susannah either for that matter," he says coldly. I don't say anymore because things are just simmering for an argument.

After we get to the hotel Taylor lets us out and he and Sawyer take the car to park and secure it. Christian and I enter the elevators and ride up in silence. Then down the hall and we enter the hotel room.

"You couldn't get a suite?" he asks as he loosens his tie and yanks it from his collar.

"Christian this is a business trip. I didn't need a suite." I walk over and start to take off my dress. "Christian why did you fly all the way here?"

"You know why, Ana," he says coldly.

"No, I don't. You didn't have to do this."

"Ana you disobeyed me. I am trying to keep you safe and you won't let me."

"Christian. I don't have to obey you. I'm an adult and I can judge for myself if I am safe or not."

"Evidently you can't. Sawyer tried to get you to come back to the hotel and you refused. What was I supposed to do?" I can hear his voice getting a bit louder.

"You are supposed to let me decide what to do in a situation. I am an adult. I can think for myself. I can make my own decisions."

Christian continues to talk as he shrugs out of his jacket and takes his cuff links out. "Ana, how long have we been together? Eight years now? You know how I feel about you not letting me take care of you. I was almost frantic when I heard you were with Leila and Susannah. I knew Leila was going to be in town, but I had no fucking idea that you would go to dinner with her."

Freezing I glare at him, "Wait. Wait just one minute. You knew Leila was going to be in Sacramento? And you didn't tell me?"

"I didn't want to upset you. I knew she would be here, but I also knew there was no way in hell I was going to be able to stop you from coming. I just kept my mouth shut and added extra security to follow her and keep an eye on her."

"You let me go through all of that when you knew she was here?"

"Yes."

"How the hell did you know she was going to be here?" I yell.

"Ana. I keep track of everyone that I think may be a threat to us. Welch gets notified any time there is any movement of any person of interest. Anytime they may be in our vicinity, I'm alerted."

"How the hell do you do that? How many fucking laws do you break to do that?" I'm getting pissed myself now.

"I don't break any. I track credit card uses, ticket purchases, newspaper articles things like that."

"Sometimes I just really don't believe you." I roll my eyes and shake my head in disbelief.

"How the hell am I supposed to take care of my family if I don't?" he yells.

"Not so loud. I don't want the people next door to hear us."

"So fucking what! If they don't like it, they can leave," he almost screams. "I'll buy the whole fucking hotel and escort them out personally."

I turn around to go to the bathroom, "Just one minute. I'm not finished talking to you."

"Well I think I'm finished talking to you." I yell back.

He walks over and grabs me by my arm, "You get your ass back over here Ana Grey. I'm mean it. We're not finished with this."

I get right up in his face," I don't have to do a fucking thing you tell me to do. You don't own me Christian Grey."

Christian is scarlet. I think he will explode, but I'm just as angry. I don't budge and am still right up in his face. "As long as you are my wife, you'll listen to me. Do you understand?"

I'm just seething, "Fuck off Christian!" I turn to walk away again and he grabs my arm and yanks me back, pulling me to him until our lips almost touch.

"You can make me so fucking mad," he growls against my lips.

" I know. Me too," I pant. He grabs my arms and pulls me to him and his mouth on mine.

"Fuck, I've missed you so much," he gasps. I push my hand down and grab his erection stroking him through the worsted wool of his slacks. I can feel him twitch as I massage the package. He circles my hips and picks me up as I wrap my legs around him. My arms circle his neck and my mouth finds his again.

"I've missed you so damn much," he growls against my neck as he deposits me on the bed. "You make me so angry when you won't let me take care of you." Edging up he spreads my thighs and crawls between them hovering over me as he continues to seal his mouth with mine. He grabs the hem of my dress and yanks it up almost ripping it, then he tugs my panties down and I finish working them off. He is grinding his erection against my pelvis. I don't know if it's his anger or that we have been away from each other for days or a combination of both, but I haven't seen him this ravenous in ages. I pop the button on his slacks and pull the zipper down, never loosing contact with his mouth. As he rolls his hips I can feel him rub between my thighs and stroke against my swollen wet flesh. "You're always ready for me," he gasps in my mouth.

"Christian I want you, please." I raise my hips to him I can feel him fill me. I'm like a junkie getting a fix. He's my drug of choice. It almost calms me knowing what is going to happen.

"Shit I've missed you, baby," he pants as he begins to push in and out. We are both ravenous, no time for slow lovemaking right now. Maybe later. Yes, definitely later. It doesn't take long for me to build and I begin to quiver against him. I was ready when he entered me. Tonight he could almost touch me and I'd come.

Christian is wasting no time building to his own release. His breathing is ragged and coarse. Looking down between us, I can watch his belly undulate and his hips roll with each push inside. "Come on baby. Show me you're mine. Come for me."

He has pushed me as far as I can go. "God, Christian. I love you." I gasp as I fall. My body tenses and then begins to tremble beneath him as I lose control to him.

"Fuck you're beautiful," he growls at me. A few seconds later I feel him tense and shudder against me, "Fuck, Ana."

As he collapses on me as he gasps to try to catch his breath; it is warm and moist against my neck and he whispers against my skin, "I love you, Ana Grey. I can't lose you. Ever."


	33. Chapter 33

_**Fifty Shades…Full Circle**_

_**Chapter 33**_

**A/N: I have gained quite a few new trilogy readers who have been asking when the next chapters are coming out. And since they did not log in I can't respond to their questions. FYI I try to post a new chapter every Wednesday and Saturday. I was trying to post three a week and it just got to be too much. Also, this book is not complete. It will continue until you see the **_**Epilogue**_** posted. We have quite a bit to go on this one. And please keep reviewing, I love to hear what you think and do try to work with your suggestions. Still in Sacramento….**

* * *

Christian is sitting on the edge of the bed in his birthday suit; best looking suit he owns. He looks far away, like he's reviewing the events of the evening in his head. As I brush my hair, I walk over and I stop in front of him standing between his open thighs. A lavender silk gown skims my body hiding very little. Putting my arms around his neck I pull him to me. "Are you okay?" I ask as I look down at him.

He nuzzles his nose against my abdomen as he puts his hands on my hips and pulls me to him. "God, you smell so good," he whispers. Reaching up he slides his index fingers under the thin straps of my gown and pulls them down my shoulders, letting the silk fabric slide down, skimming my curves and pooling at my feet. Again he takes my hips in his hands and pulls me to him. The warm soft kisses he is spreading across my abdomen are telling me he's ready for his scoop of vanilla. My skin begins to tingle as he places gentle kisses across the scar low on my tummy. My hands rake through his hair and then continue gliding down the back of his neck and over his shoulders making sure I don't do any further damage to him with my cast. As he raises his head to look up at me he gently and sweetly kisses the skin on my breasts as he pulls his fingers through the wet area nestled between my thighs.

I let my head fall back as I quiver and gasp at his touch. "Oh, God."

"I want you again. I need you Anastasia," he whispers, continuing to stroke his fingers between my thighs. Standing up he takes me in his arms and pulls me to him pressing his lips to mine and parting them with his tongue. Loosening his hold on me, he drops to his knees and buries his nose between my thighs. I part them as he wraps his arms around my hips and cups my behind in his hands. At the first touch of his mouth on my wet flesh, a soft sigh escapes me.

Cupping his head in my hands I feel my body quivering as he makes love to me with his mouth. His skilled tongue is driving me to the edge and my legs tremble under the strain of the intense pleasure. "I can't do this standing up." I gasp down at him.

"Yes you can," he whispers up to me. Fisting my hands in his copper locks I am about to lose control and I bend over him for support as I give myself to him and let him push me over the edge. He steadies me as I begin to tremble and shudder against him. His mouth pulls everything that I have from me, as my body responds to him.

His fingers slide over my threshold and inside me as my body contracts against them, pulling and teasing them. They rub against the spot inside and that intensifies what he is already giving me. I'm almost ready to collapse and he grabs me steadying me as I crumble against him. He takes me in his arms as he rises to his feet and gently places me on the bed. My legs feel like Jell-O and part for him as he crawls over me. Burying his head in my neck, I inhale as he slides over my threshold and inside. Giving me a moment to adjust, I can feel him expanding in girth as his excitement builds. "Oh, Baby. I've missed you," he whispers. I can feel the slight movement as he gently begins to rock in and out in short quick pushes.

"God you drive me crazy when you do that," I gasp at him.

"Good. I want to drive you crazy," he whispers in kisses down my neck. His thrusts become longer and slower turning into a gentle gliding in and out. He is rubbing against me inside and I am already overly sensitive. I watch his abdomen undulating against mine as he rolls his hips with each thrust. God that's so hot. The visual of him thrusting in and out makes me climb faster. He is so fucking gorgeous and right now all he can see is me, all he wants is me. And I want him.

"Are you close?" he asks. "Can you come for me?" he is panting for air.

I nod, "Yes. You have me baby." I look into his eyes as I fall and my body accepts the pleasure he wants me to have once more. Throwing my head back I can only whimper. "Fuck, Christian," Is all I can get out as I begin to explode around him; giving him what he wants from me. My eyes lock with his as my abdomen quivers and I tremble beneath him. My mind goes blank and the spasms are all that I can concentrate on. After a few seconds, my brain begins to clear and I gain control over my body again.

"God you're beautiful when you do that," he growls as he buries his head in my neck and begins to thrust harder, deeper , faster. He is panting to catch his breath as he races to his approaching orgasm. "Fuck," he gasps. His face is scarlet and taut with pleasure as he finally reaches his goal and his body tenses, "Ahhh, shit," he snarls as he falls on me. His body shudders against me as he rides out his release. Coming to his senses again, he begins to breath and I feel the mist of sweat that shrouds our bodies. They are slick where they come together and easily glide over one another.

"God, I'm glad you're here," I whisper next to his ear.

"Me too, he whispers back," still trying to catch his breath. I can hear myself gasp as he moves from me and rolls next to me on the bed. I turn to face him and trace his lips with my finger then gently touch his lips with mine. "I love you." I mouth. Wrapping his arms around me he pulls me closer, "I love you too baby."

"Christian, I'm sorry that I worried you. I didn't mean to."

"I know. I just can't lose you. Please, please, let me keep you safe. Let me take care of you."

When he says that, it reminds me of what Leila said to me. She had wanted someone to take care of her. It makes me realize how lucky I am to have someone who cares so deeply for me.

"Sweetheart, I don't think I was in any danger with Leila. I think she just wanted to somehow tell you good bye and thank you."

"What are you talking about?"

"When we were in the ladies room, she asked me to tell you that she was grateful for what you did for her. She said that she is very much in love with her husband and that this time it was a good healthy relationship. I think when she said goodbye, it was for good this time."

"Fuck, I hope so."

"She apologized for the gun incident and said that she realized how ill she was. She told me that, at the time she wasn't able to take care of herself and that she had come hoping you would do it. And you did. I think she just might make it."

"She did look like the old Leila, tonight." He lightens up a bit.

"And what about Susannah? She looks good too." I snuggle in closer to him. "I hope she really loves Paul."

"I do, too, but I don't put a lot of stock in that one."

"Really? Why?"

"After tonight? The way she acted?"

"What do you mean?" I ask. "I think she was just helping Leila. I think Leila wanted to be able to thank you and Susannah helped her be in the position so she could."

"Leila could have sent a telegram if she wanted to thank me."

Giggling, I ask, "Do they still have telegrams?"

"Fuck I don't know. Can't see why they would. I just mean there were other ways to thank me."

"Baby, if you don't want to be contacted, you can make it pretty difficult to get in touch with you."

"I know. I pay people to do that for me," he grumbles.

"And believe me they do an excellent job, sweetheart," I remind him. "Hey, how are the kids? Did you leave them with Gail?" I ask.

"Yes. She took over for me so I could fly down. They're fine, baby. Don't worry about that."

"I can't help it. Unless they are encased in bubble wrap and sitting in my lap, I'm going worry."

"I know. I think I made an excellent choice for the mother of my children."

"What? You make it sound like you were selecting a bottle of wine and I was a good vintage. And here I thought you fell in love with me."

"I didn't. I fell in love with that giggle. I was so taken with it that I wanted to be able to hear it the rest of my life. I figured the only way to do that was to marry you. The kids just sort of…..happened."

"God, you can be so romantic when you try," I tease.

As he kisses me, he rolls over and lies on top of me, "Come here. I'll show you romantic, Mrs. Grey."

I give him his giggle.

"Ahh. There it is. Now just be careful with that cast," he says smiling down at me.

* * *

The sun peeps through my separating eyelids and I gently peel open my eyes. Christian is draped across me. It feels good to have him there. When I try to move I realize how much my muscles ache. We mad love until almost four this morning and I'm worn out. Christian must be tired, because he hasn't stirred.

I really wish I could stay here wrapped up in him, but I do need to go to work. It's my last day here. I need to check on all the equipment they will be shipping down for my office. Check my schedule with Connie and wrap everything up before flying back home. As I try to stretch, I feel him tighten his hold and bite my nipple through the silk of my gown. "Don't get up," he grumbles. "You're warm and soft."

"Baby, I have to go to work. I need to meet Bob around eight to leave."

"Fuck Bob," he says as his hand snakes up inside my gown, "You need to meet me right now."

Having Christian for breakfast beats anything the room service menu has to offer.

After I get out of the shower and dry my hair, I talk to him as I finish getting ready to leave. Are you going back this morning?" I ask him as he lollygags in the bed watching me slide into my lingerie.

"I was thinking about waiting until you get finished and then we can fly back together."

"I like that idea. How are you liking the new copter?" I ask.

"I took the rental plane. It was faster. But I really like the new copter. I sort of miss Charlie Tango, but it served its purpose. Charlie II is just a newer better version."

"Have you heard anything on how our plane is coming?" I ask him.

"Yeah there is progress. They have finished the exterior paint and are ahead of schedule on the interior remodel. We should get it in a couple of months." He smiles over at me. "Then Mrs. Grey, I'm taking you on an extended vacation. I haven't had you all to myself for an extended period of time in years. I need to be able to roll around with you uninterrupted for as long as we want to."

"I like the way that sounds." I give him a wicked grin.

"And I like watching you get dressed," he adds.

"Really? I thought you would prefer watching me get undressed."

"I like that too, but I'd rather undress you myself."

I put the finishing touches on my hair and makeup and grab my purse, then go sit next him on the edge of the bed. I give him a quick kiss, "Order yourself some breakfast and I'll probably be back around noon. I'll let Paul know I'll be returning to Seattle with my husband and his entourage de la sécurité. That's French for Taylor and Sawyer."

"Yes, Mrs. Grey. I do speak French. I'm keeping the room, I'll be right here waiting for you." He tells me then pops my butt with his palm. "Now go earn a living. You need to able to afford to keep me up in the manner in which I have become accustom, and I'm very expensive."

Getting down to the lobby, Sawyer is waiting on me. "Good morning Sawyer. Have you had breakfast?"

"Yes, Mrs. Grey all ready to go," he says.

"Taylor didn't yell at you did he?" I ask.

"About what Mrs. Grey?"

"About me going to dinner last night, after I was told not to."

He shakes his head, "No ma'am. He said similar things happened to him before you and Mr. Grey got married. Said you were difficult to keep up with sometimes."

"Are you sure he didn't just say that I was hard headed and uncooperative?"

"Well something to that effect, Mrs. Grey," he smiles at me.

"We'll be going back with Mr. Grey in the jet this afternoon. I'll let Mr. Sanders know we've changed plans and won't be returning on his jet."

About that time Paul appears and he looks ready to go. "Good morning Paul."

"Morning Ana. Sawyer." He gives Sawyer a nod. "Well let's get rolling. They're bringing the car around."

Sitting in the back seat on the way to SAP things are fairly quiet.

"Paul, Christian is going to wait on me today and we'll fly back to Seattle with him. Is that okay?" I ask.

"Of course. I can understand if you would rather not fly back with us. I want to apologize for everything last night. I had no idea that you all knew each other and there was all this history with everybody."

"Paul. Don't worry about it. I really think it was a coincidence. I can't imagine any of it was planned."

"No, I don't think it was planned, but I'm sorry it happened anyway. Susie had neglected to tell me about Christian," he says.

"Well, a girl doesn't want to give away all her secrets." I try to smooth it over a little.

"This is one secret she should have disclosed to me. A man should be aware when he is sitting down to dinner with another man who has slept with his fiancée," he pauses a moment and realizes what he has said. "I'm sorry. I put that badly."

"No, Paul, I'm sorry. It was uncomfortable for all of us, well most of us anyway. When I married Christian, I knew he came with a certain amount of history. Everyone comes with some sort of baggage, just different types I guess," I suggest. "I know you and Susie will be glad to get home."

"Yes. Trips can be tiring. Besides I have my girls coming in tomorrow night for a week."

After I meet with Connie most of the morning, then talk to IT about my equipment, then have one more meeting with an author, I think I'm finally finished here. Paul still has a few things to finish up, so Sawyer and I head back to the hotel without him.

Arriving at the hotel, I tell Sawyer that I will call him when I verify travel plans with Christian. When I get to our room, Christian is up and dressed in jeans and a Khaki T-shirt. As usual he is on the phone and has his laptop open in front of him. When I enter the room he motions for me to come in.

"Right..Right Andrea….look you know I'll have my cell…just get those letters and memos out today. I'll look over the contracts once Ros has reviewed and okayed them…..Right. Okay. I'm still in Sacramento, but should be home tomorrow….you know how to handle everything. Bye."

He pitches his phone on the table and pulls me into his lap. "Are you finished ?"

"Yep. I'm all yours." He pulls me closer. "I was thinking we might stay over until tomorrow. Would you like that? We can look around the city, go out and eat, spend a little time in the sack. How does that sound?" he asks.

"It sounds good. Good for us. I hate to keep Sawyer and Taylor away from home another day. And I sort of miss the kids."

He shrugs, "It's up to you. If you'd rather go back we can. "

"I wouldn't rather go back, I just feel bad keeping Taylor and Sawyer." I tell him.

"How about we let them take the jet back and we can rent a car and drive back. We can stop and eat and along the way, just take our time. We can take I5 or cut over and take 101 up the coast."

"Christian that sounds wonderful. I can't remember when I've had you to myself for that long. Are you sure you have the time?" I ask.

"For you, I have nothing but time. Besides I have some apologizing to do and it may take me a while."

I pull back and glare at him, "What do you have to apologize for?"

"Well I'm sure I should be apologizing for a thousand different things I've done, but this one in particular. Do you remember last year when I came home and Grace had gotten lipstick all over herself and the carpet?"

"Yes, I do. It was _Flamingo Pink_ lipstick as I recall."

"Well, night before last after getting Teddy and JackO settled in, I went to find Grace to get her in her pajamas. I found her in your dressing room. She had gotten into your make-up and she had eye shadow and that pink stuff you put on your cheeks. She had put it all over her face and it had crumbled all over the floor and ground in the carpet. When I saw her the first thing I thought about was how I yelled at you for not watching her properly. And I'm sorry. She just did it before I realized it. It wasn't that I wasn't watching her." He laughs, "I wasn't going to tell you and sent Gail out to get replacements, but she said you would be able to tell the difference and I should just come clean about it."

"Well. I see. How did she look?" I ask.

"What?"

"How did Grace look?"

"Like a clown." He snorts and chuckles. " When I first saw her I just watched her for a minute before I stopped her. She was having such a good time. She was painting her face with those big brushes and talking to herself. That girl does enjoy looking in a mirror."

"Yes, she does. Now you see how quickly it can happen." I hold him tighter. "Sweetheart, as much as I love you, would you mind if we fly home in the morning? I miss the kids."

He kisses my nose, "No I wouldn't mind at all. But I do have this hotel room until tomorrow. And I have gotten one for Taylor. We'll just go out this evening and then leave in the morning."

"That sounds like an excellent idea to me. Are you sure you don't mind not having a suite?"

"All I need is you and a bed."

"I thought all you needed was me and any flat surface."

"That, too."

_**Happy Holidays 'yall!**_


	34. Chapter 34

**Chapter 34**

**A/N: This is not a chapter. I get so many reviews and PMs asking, Why does Ana always give in to Christian? Why does Ana always let Christian have sex? Why does Christian need to be so dominate? Why does he always have to control Ana? Why doesn't Ana have a backbone? **

**In doing some research, I ran across these. Perhaps reading them, will cast some light on their relationship. Though they are growing and maturing, they have a relationship that works for them. It may not be the relationship that would work for everyone, but it has kept them together. I have found the website, **_**The Submissive's Journey, **_**helpful. All of the material below was obtained from the web. I own none of it. Credit has been given where applicable.**

* * *

**The Dominant's Creed**

(From A Submissive's Journey)

Above all else he cherishes his submissive, in the knowledge that the gift she gives him is the greatest of all.

He is demanding and takes full advantage of the power given to him, but knows how to share the pleasure that comes from that precious gift.

He is in control of himself first and foremost, so that he may control others. As a stern and demanding Dominant, he can cause his sub to cry real tears. As the consummate lover, he will then kiss the tears away, without ever stepping out of character.

In times of trouble, a Dominant will leave the roles behind, to be a supportive friend and partner, never forgetting that this is still a loving relationship between two caring individuals. He is quick to understand the differences between fantasy and reality. He would never ask a submissive to put him before her career, or family, just to satisfy his own pleasure.

To win his submissive's mind, body and soul, he knows he must first win her trust. He will show his submissive humor, kindness, and warmth. He must also show her that his guidance and tutoring is knowledgeable and deserving of her attention, that this is a man she can learn from, and trust his direction.

He is romantic enough to be protective and chivalrous. When called upon, he will fight for his ladies' honor. He proves to her that he is someone she can lean on, and depend on.

He is old-fashioned enough to be a bit of a chauvinist, yet modern enough to respect his woman. Quick to point out the differences between them, he also knows there is no inferiority in those differences.

When it comes time to teach his submissive her lessons of obedience, he is a strong and unyielding professor. He will accept no flaw, nothing less than perfection from his student. Never does he use discipline without good reason. When he does, it is always with a knowledgeable and careful hand.

He is a careful guide, with safety always his main concern. He knows how to use pain to extend the bounds of pleasure. He is a mentor who can bring her to the edges of her envelope, and gently show her the inner courage to reach new heights.

He is always open to communication and discussion, always ready to hear her wants and needs. He is patient, taking the time to learn her limits, and knowing that as her trust of him grows, so will they.

He never has to demand ritual behavior by her. She responds to him out the want of pleasing him. Compliance comes from the wanting to please, not the fear of punishment. He understands the fragile nature of mind and body, and never violates the trust given to him.

He is secure enough to laugh at himself and the absurdities of life. Courageous enough to accept assistance. Open minded enough to learn new things. Strong enough to grow. His tools are mind, body, spirit and soul with a little help from rope, paddle and blindfold. He understands that each partner gains most from pleasuring the other. And both of them know that love is the only binding that truly holds.

Copyright © 2002 - 2011 [A submissives journey]. All rights reserved.

Revised: February 02, 2012

* * *

**The Submissive's Prayer**

(From A Submissive's Journey)

Allow me the strength to answer questions I can't fathom.

Allow me the spirit to know His needs.

Allow me the serenity to serve Him in peace.

Allow me the love to show Him myself.

Allow me the tenderness to comfort Him.

Allow me the light to show us the way.

Allow me the wisdom to be an asset to Him.

Let me be able to show Him each day my love of my service to Him.

Let me open myself up to completely belong to Him.

Let me accept my punishment with the grace of a woman.

Let me learn to please Him, beyond myself.

Grant me the power to give myself to Him completely.

Give me the strength to please us both.

Permit me to love myself, in loving Him.

For it is my greatest wish, my highest power to make His life

complete, as He makes mine.

_(Author Unknown)_

_Copyright © 2002 2012 [A submissives journey]. All rights reserved._

_Revised: June 12, 2012_

* * *

**The Dominant's Prayer**

To the power more powerful then myself

I was born in a way that has sometimes left me mystified

Always reaching to guide those about me

Needing to know that they are fulfilled before true fulfillment reaches in to caress my soul

I have compromised, in many cases, to allow another to be fulfilled

Wondering all the while how it is that they can not see me first, as I see them

I have found myself pushing away all, in denial of my need to always consider another first

Needing to be the one to consider others more needy then myself

The world about me thinks that giving completely is reserved for those who submit

That serving another is not for the "strong"

How could "they" be so wrong

I love that I am the one who can be turned to

The one to solve a problem

The one to set the direction

The Top

The Dominant

Please help me to remain focused on this need to walk to the front

To always stop when a searching soul reaches out for a hand up

To always be strong enough to pause when all is insanity

To always surge forward when all has stalled

And to give all of me to becoming ALL

Please help me to know when the hand I extend needs to be soft

When it needs to be harsh

When it is needed to wipe a tear or crush a fear

When it is needed for punishment

And when all that is needed is a hug

Please let my nature push through the world about me that questions

I am a Dom

I can be no other

Let me be ALL that is right

_Grifter (07 September 1998)_

**I hope this will answer some questions. I understand it, but I don't pretend to have the answers**_. _


	35. Chapter 35

_**Fifty Shades…Full Circle**_

_**Chapter 35**_

**A/N: I had no idea I had so many readers in so many countries! I got Holiday wishes in so many languages. I often get reviews in other languages, (thank heaven for Google Translate.) but I had no idea there were so many. Thank you.**

**Sorry for the last 'chapter'. It should probably have been a forum with all the discussion. I just get so many complaints about Ana being weak. I ran across those and thought they were beautiful and seemed to explain their relationship so well. I see Ana as a very strong woman in her support and love for Christian. They fit well. Thanks for all the discussion. "And both of them know that love is the only binding that truly holds."**

* * *

**The last night in Sacramento….**

Waking up, I'm in my favorite place in the world; snuggled up to Christian and wrapped in his arms. I could get used to this getting off at lunch and spending the entire afternoon rolling around with Christian Grey. Lying here buck naked my ass is getting a little chilly. As I reach for the blanket to cover myself Christian stirs awake.

"Hey there," he grumbles.

"Hey there, yourself," I grumble back.

"Here let me help you," he mumbles as he pulls the blanket up and covers us. "Are you cold?"

"I was getting that way. Thank you." He pulls me closer and buffs my back to warm me up. I snuggle in to his chest as far as I can, "Mmmm. I like this."

"Me too. Are you hungry yet?" he asks.

"No too much yet." When he talks about hungry, I think about little Tommy and I pray that he is okay.

Christian looks down at me, "What's wrong, baby? You look a million miles away," he asks.

"Oh nothing much."

"That usually means it's something fairly important." He gives me a quick squeeze, "Come on. Tell me what's bothering you?"

I quickly debate telling him about the incident with Tommy and Lorna and decide to go ahead and fess up. "Well I met someone while I was here."

I can feel him tense against me, "What do you mean you met someone?"

"There has been this pitiful young girl that has been panhandling outside the front door of the hotel since I've been here."

"Did she ask you for money?" he asks.

"Yes, but…."

"Did you give her any?"

"Yes, but…"

"Ana. Why? She'll probably just use it to buy drugs."

"Yes, but..."

"There are ways to help other than to give her cash."

"May I speak now?" I look up at him.

"Of course. Why?"

"You aren't letting me get a word in. Look, she had been standing out by the front door for several days. She looked awful; dirty, stringy hair, underweight." I tell him. "Anyway, yesterday when I went out, she wasn't there, but there was the sweetest, cutest little boy in her place."

"Oh good Lord," he rubs his hand over his face. "What did you do?" he asks.

"Well he looked like he was all alone. He looked like he was about Grace's age and he had no business being on a busy city street by himself. Besides he was eating on an old sandwich that someone had thrown away."

"And?"

"And so I went over to see about him and evidently he belonged to the girl who had been panhandling. She asked me for ten dollars to feed the little boy and I figured she'd just spend it on drugs, so I offered to take them to get something to eat. She said no, so I offered to let her have the ten dollars if she would let me take them to get some food."

"What did she say?"

"She agreed, so I took them to the diner and bought them lunch."

"Sawyer let you do that?" he asks.

"Before you jump on poor Sawyer, he tried to stop me, but…."

"But you did it anyway."

"Yes, I did. And Sawyer went with us to protect me from the frail teenager and little boy."

"So you ate lunch with the panhandling teenager and her starving child."

"Yes. And after lunch I gave her twenty dollars."

"Yep. That sounds about like what you'd do." He kisses my forehead and gives me a smile.

"Sweetheart, if you could have seen his little face. He was so sweet and looked so pitiful. How could I not feed him?"

"Ana, I know why you did it. I just want you to be careful. You can't change my childhood by helping someone else."

"I know. He just broke my heart. I wanted to take him home and get him cleaned up and give him some good clean food."

"Baby, he's not a stray dog that you pick up and take home." He strokes my cheek. "He'll be okay. His mother thought enough of him to try to get him something to eat. Wish mine had at least cared if I ate or not."

I'm this close to telling him about Virginia. I want him to know the truth. Now probably isn't the best time to do it, though. Not after dinner with the subs and feeding the panhandler. He'll never let me out of the house alone again.

"Speaking of strays, how's Jack?"

"Good." He snorts. "He's a cute little thing. Teddy just can't leave him alone for a minute. He's going to wear him out."

"Maybe we should have gotten him a dog sooner."

"No. I think he's at a good age to have one now. Grace is another story."

"What has she done?" I ask.

"Nothing really, just worrying him to death. Trying to put clothes on him and trying to make him sit at tea parties. He's a good natured little dog. He just takes it all in stride and hangs in there with them."

"You seem to like him yourself."

"He's been good company at night. After the kids go to bed he sits with me in my office while I work. Sometimes he jumps up on the bed and sits next to me."

"On the bed?" I can't believe it. "Christian he's too small to jump way up on that bed. Are you sure you aren't putting him up there yourself?"

"Well, maybe just a time or two."

"You can act like such a curmudgeon sometimes, but you really are just a softie inside. I take it no one has come forward to claim him."

"You take it right. As much as I hated to do it, we did put an ad in the paper. Haven't gotten any responses on it."

"That's good. It would crush Teddy to have to give him back."

"Oh, I think he'll get to keep him. If anyone does come forward, I'm not above buying that dog for him."

"Christian Grey. You'd do that?"

"Yep."

"What if they wouldn't take any money for him?"

"Trust me; I have more money than they have an attachment to the dog."

"Our kids are so lucky to have you. You're a pretty good dad." I smile up at him and give him a peck on his lips.

"What do you want for dinner?" he asks.

"I have no idea, but I guess I am getting hungry."

Christian gets up and grabs his laptop bringing it back to bed with him. He fires it up, "Let's see what we can find to get into and what's good to eat in good old Sacramento." He gets a scowl on his face, "Hmm."

"What is it sweetheart?" I ask him.

"Oh nothing, just got an email that was interesting," he replies. "Why don't we go down to Broadway? It looks like there is a place to eat and go to a movie. Tower Theater and Café."

"Movie?" I look startled. "You want to go to a movie?"

"Isn't that what the usual date consists of? Dinner and a movie?" he asks me.

"Since when do you do anything that's usual?" I ask him.

"The weather is nice. We could get a little exercise and look around. Then have dinner and see what's playing. Anything wrong with that?"

"No, nothing wrong with that at all. Let's do it." I know I'm smiling like a kid on Christmas morning. We never get to do anything like this in Seattle. After a quick shower we are dressed and heading out of the room to the lobby. Christian is his khakis, leather slip-ons and a pressed white oxford cloth shirt. I've slipped into a long skirt and oversized top with three quarter sleeves and sandals, ponytail and hoop earrings. We both have our sunglasses on as we stroll thru the lobby and out the front door. Christian has rented a Porsche Boxster convertible for us to drive to the movie. We jump into the car and I see Taylor and Sawyer close behind in the SUV. Pulling out into traffic we take off. Christian's hair is blowing in the wind and he has a smile plastered on his face. He looks so young and carefree and happy. Looking over at me he smiles and takes my hand in his giving it a squeeze.

"What?" he asks looking back and forth between me and the road.

"Oh nothing. You just look happy." I tell him.

"That's because I am happy, Mrs. Grey."

We arrive at the Café and eat outside on the patio. It's a nice cool evening and the sunset is lovely. We share a bottle of wine and relax, and eat and watch the sun set. After finishing dinner we head for the theater and pick a movie to see. I'm still in awe. Christian Grey taking me to a movie. After we find a seat, Christian runs back out for popcorn and a large drink that we share. He takes my hand and I lean over on his shoulder. This is so incredible, just Christian and me at a movie just like the rest of the world gets to do. Except most of the world doesn't have a Taylor and Sawyer sitting three rows behind them.

Christian puts his arm around me and we settle in to watch the film. He is sweetly stroking my neck with his thumb as we watch the previews of whatever is coming in the future. It's so calming and relaxing just feeling him touch my skin. As the featured film begins his arm drops to my shoulder and I about melt when he begins to gently stroke he top of my breast through my shirt and bra with his fingers in the dark as he nuzzles my hair. This is incredible. I think this is what teenagers do at the movie, and now I see why. I love this. I snuggle in closer as we watch the film. My heart is racing and my breathing is catching. My hand is on his thigh and I can feel that he is definitely growing under that cotton khaki.

"What's this movie about?" Christian whispers.

"I have no idea. I can't concentrate on the movie," I whisper back.

Christian finally leans over and kisses me in the dark theater.

"Good God. Would you two get a room." We hear behind us.

"Want to get a room, Mrs. Grey?" Christian whispers.

I nod emphatically and grin as Christian takes me by the hand and pulls me to my feet. We quickly exit the theater and he pulls me close and puts his arm around me as we laugh and giggle on our way to the car.

Christian opens the car door for me and I slide in the front seat. He slips around to the other side and gets behind the wheel of the convertible. Poor Sawyer and Taylor are rushing to the SUV trying to keep up with us. We take off and head back to the hotel. When we arrive we exit the car and Christian tosses the keys to the valet and slips him a large tip to get it back to the rental company. "Make sure this gets back, will ya'?" he grins as he slips him a hundred dollar bill.

"Yes, Mr. Grey. I'll take care of it," the young guy smiles and takes the keys from Christian. As we walk through the lobby arm in arm, the man behind the desk tries to catch our attention.

"Excuse me Mr. Grey. Uh, Mr. Grey."

Christian stops and looks over at the young man. "What?"

"Um, Mr. Grey, there was a package delivered for you. I had it sent up to your room, sir."

"A package?" Christian looks bewildered.

"Yes, sir. It was messengered over a couple of hours ago."

"Okay."

"Wonder what it is?" I ask him as we head for the elevator.

When we hit the elevator before it can start to move, Christian has me pinned to the wall and has yanked my skirt up running his hand between my legs. His mouth is on mine and he is parting my lips with his tongue as he searches for mine. I circle his neck with my arms as our lips dance across each other and let my leg glide up his until it reaches his waist. His hand slides underneath my thigh and holds it tight as he grinds his pelvis into me letting me feel his erection. As the elevator glides to a halt he releases me and we straighten ourselves just in time to exit past an older couple just getting on.

"Movies must excite you," I grin up at him as we walk to our room.

"You excite me," he growls back.

As we enter or room and flip on the light we see the large package wrapped in brown paper, with an envelope attached.

"What the fuck?" Christian grumbles as he snatches the envelope from the object and rips it open.

"Christian. What is it? Who's it from?" I ask.

"Fuck. It's from Leila. It's one of her paintings; a gift to us." He looks perturbed as he goes to rip the paper off.

"No. Don't open it." I tell him.

"What?" he looks over at me.

"I said don't open it. Just put the note back on it and send it back unopened," I tell him. "This whole mess is over. If you open that then she'll just keep it up. It will be something else next time. And frankly I'm just over all of it. I am officially dismantling the sub club. This sub shit is over. Elena is dead and Susie and Leila need to move on. Heaven only knows where the other thirteen are, but since we haven't heard from them up to now, I'm assuming we never will. I never want to hear from any of them again. Ever."

I walk over and put my arms around him, "Christian Grey, you're the father of my children, the man of my dreams and the love of my life. I've been with you through, births and deaths, and kidnappings and shootings, so I'll be damned if I lose you to something as silly as another woman." Cupping his face in my hands, "To quote a very wise man, You. Are. Mine. And I take care of what's mine." I pull his face to me until our lips meet and he takes me in his arms. "Now take me to bed and make love to me like only you can. And when you're finished, send that piece of shit back to where ever it came from."

"I'm not sure where all that came from, Mrs. Grey, but I do believe I like it," he pulls me to him and takes my lips with his, tugging on my lower lip.

"Like it?" I ask.

"Yes. I like knowing that you can get so jealous."

"Christian did you never know that I get jealous?" I ask incredulously.

"You never show it. I just assumed that you didn't get that jealous."

"Christian, do know how you feel when I so much as occupy space in a room where another man is?"

"Yes."

"Well I feel that way too… sometimes. Especially when these past relationships rear their ugly heads. I just try to contain it, because I know you love me."

"It makes me feel treasured when you get jealous."

"Well you're going to feel dead if you don't get that piece of whatever it is out of here." He goes to move and I hold him tight. "But not until after you've finished what you started in the theater."

* * *

When my eyes open I scoot over to snuggle up to my husband, but his side of the bed is empty. Sitting up I look around and see him up and dressed. He is sitting at the desk in the room sipping coffee and working on his laptop.

"Mmmmm," I stretch and yawn. "What are you up to?" I growl at him.

"Oh about eight, eight and a half inches," he grins as he gets up and walks over to the bed.

"Oh, is that what that was that was bothering me last night? I thought it was a gnat and kept swatting it away."

He sits on the edge of the bed and leans over pulling me to him, "As well as I remember it made contact a few times."

"Mmm, yes it did." I smile up at him and he gives me a good morning kiss.

"I ordered you some tea, cut fruit and a warm croissant with honey and butter," he whispers against my neck.

"Thanks. That was sweet of you. What are you doing?" I ask him.

"Just checking emails and firing off a few." He grumbles as he nuzzles my neck, "You're warm and you smell good."

I push him off, "Enough. You are just insatiable. Will you ever get enough?"

"Baby when we're dead and in the ground, I'll still be trying to crawl over into your casket with you so I can jump your bones, literally. I guess they'll just have to put us in the same one and bury us together."

"Ooo. That's gross. Can I be dead first?" I ask.

"We'll see. Maybe I'll be like the pharos and have my wives buried with me, dead or alive." His eyes get big and ominous as he descends on me and bites my neck.

"Well if you have wives other than me , don't count on me joining you." I can't help but giggle a bit, "Get off. Enough Grey."

Swatting my butt as he stands up, "Okay. Get up and get your breakfast so we can get back to our spawn."

After devouring my croissant and tea, I get my shower and dress, then begin the arduous task of packing. I hate packing.

"Are you sure you don't want to drive back?" he asks.

"I would love to spend the time with you, but I really miss the kids. I haven't seen them in a week." I tell him.

"Four days." He mumbles as he takes a bite of his croissant.

"What?" I turn and ask.

"It's been four days not a week."

"Well, same thing."

"No, four days is not a week. It's four days." He sips his coffee.

"Do you have a bug up your butt this morning?" I ask.

"No. Just aggravating you," he grins.

"Besides our anniversary is next weekend and I need to save myself." I tell him.

"For what?"

"For all the anniversary sex." I smile over at him.

"Mmm, that's right. Are we still spending a quiet evening at home without the kids?" He asks.

"You got it sport. You. Me. And the house all to ourselves."

"Sounds like a date to me."

I notice Leila's 'present' is missing, "What happened to the picture?"

"I had it messengered back. Unopened. Just as you instructed, Mrs. Grey."

"Very good." I compliment him. "Maybe that will send a message that all is forgiven, I'm glad you're happy and stay the fuck away from my husband."

Christian walks over and puts his arms around my waist and nuzzles my neck, "You sure have gotten territorial lately."

I continue to fold and pack as he kisses my neck, "Not really. I've always been territorial when it comes to my husband and my kids."

"I think I like being yours, Mrs. Grey."

"Well. That's good because I'm not letting you go anywhere." Reaching behind me I cup his face in my hand.

"I hadn't planned on going anywhere." He squeezes me, "Got all I need right here. Baby, I'm sorry you've had to put up with all the shit from my past."

"Sweetheart we all come with a past. It makes us who we are now," I tell him.

"You didn't come with a past."

"I beg your pardon. I have a past, thank you very much."

"Not any to speak of," he teases me.

"Well, I didn't hatch the moment I met you. I dated a bit."

"Yeah, a very little bit and I'm not complaining. I like that you're mine. I've taught you well, Mrs. Grey," he pulls me tighter and nuzzles my neck.

"You're a good teacher." I glance back at him and smile.

"You're a good student," he whispers in my ear. "Would you like a quick lesson?"

"I need to pack. We have a plane to catch."

He turns me around and brushes his lips against mine, "Trust me. It won't leave without us."

* * *

Christian and I board the plane and take our seats followed closely behind by Sawyer and Taylor.

"I'll be glad to get home. I've missed my babies." I smile over at Christian as I buckle up.

"Yeah. They drive you crazy when you're with them and then you miss them as soon as you're away from them," he says. "I'll be glad to get home myself."

"I enjoyed having you with me last night." Taking his hand I give it a squeeze.

"I enjoyed being with you."

"Christian. Thanks for coming to Sacramento. I never felt any kind of threat from Leila or Susie, but I love it that you cared enough to come protect me from them. You are my knight in shining armor."

"That's what I do. You trusted me enough to give yourself to me and I'll take care of you. I love you and I'll always protect you." He puts his lips to my hand and gives it a soft kiss.

"How did I get so lucky, Mr. Grey?" I ask.

"We both got lucky , Anastasia." He leans over and gently kisses me. " We both got incredibly lucky."

**Eat some fruit cake and put a little flavorin' in the eggnog.**

**HO! HO! HO!**


	36. Chapter 36

_**A Christmas Memory**_

Sliding into bed I snuggle up next to Christian and he wraps his arm around me. "Mmm. You feel good." I tell him as I press my lips to his chest.

He gives me a kiss on my forehead as I look up at him. Chuckling a bit, I wrap myself closer.

"What?" he asks.

"Hummm?"

"What are you laughing about?"

"I'm not laughing. I was just remembering the first Christmas we spent together."

"What brought that on?" he asks.

"I have no idea. It just ran across my mind. I remember how awkward it was for me," I tell him.

"I really felt sort of bad for you. You seemed so lost," he remembers.

"That's because I was. Remember that tree we got?" I ask.

"I do. I thought we were going to get a divorce over it," he chuckles. "After I left home, I had never decorated for Christmas."

"I know you were just an old Grinch." I grin up at him.

"I never put up a tree. Gail finally started putting one up for me and decorating the apartment a little, but It was always just another day for me. I almost hated it. I had to get up and drag myself over to the house and act all happy and pretend to love every present that I got. Then after I met you, it all changed."

"I was so homesick that first year. It was my first Christmas away from Ray and Mom. I had always spent Christmas day with Ray and then flew to see Mom and Bob the day after Christmas and stayed until New Years. Oh, God," I laugh, " and I was so pregnant. I was miserable."

"You wanted a damn Christmas tree. I knew you weren't happy, so I agreed to go help pick out a tree with you. I didn't know fuck about picking out a Christmas tree."

I laugh. "I know. You were beside yourself. Then when we got it back to the apartment, it was crooked and you kept trying to cut it off to straighten it out. But it just got worse." I can't help but laugh.

"Yeah. I didn't know whether to throw the tree over the balcony or you. Every time I tried to get it straight you would complain that it was still crooked and laugh at me. I really wanted to kill you, you know," he confesses.

"But you were so cute trying to get it right. Finally we just gave up and decorated it while it leaned to the left."

"God that was a pitiful tree," he shakes his head.

"And I knew we had to go over to your parent's house on Christmas day. I was so nervous. I still didn't know your family that well. And I had never had a big family; it was always just Ray and me on Christmas morning. Now I had all the Grey's to deal with."

"I didn't know you were nervous about spending Christmas with them."

"Sure I was. I didn't know if what we had gotten them was going to be good enough. Carrick still intimidated me. I was still having morning sickness and I knew your Mom would have this enormous dinner prepared. I wasn't sure what to wear. And I felt huge."

"You looked beautiful," he kisses my forehead again.

"Thank you."

"Even though you were huge," he grins.

"I was so nervous I thought I was going throw up. Gail had been so nice to me. She really was trying to make me feel at home. I remember she let me bake ginger cookies with her. We had a really good time in the kitchen that day. We laughed and cut out cookies all afternoon."

"I remember when I came home that day the apartment smelled like cookies," he recalls. "You know I think that was the first time it really felt like home to me. To walk in out of the snow into a warm apartment that smelled like cookies and see a fire in the fireplace. Then to look over to find you in the kitchen carrying our first child and giggling while you took cookies out of the oven. I can't explain how I felt. It was like ….like all was right with the world. Like everything was just the way it was supposed to be."

"I know. I think for me it was waking up on Christmas morning and looking over to see you asleep next to me." I tell him. " I always woke up alone on Christmas morning. But to look at your face and then feel my baby kick. That was it for me. I knew I'd never wake up alone on Christmas morning again. I knew my home was where ever you were. You were my home then and have been ever since, Christian Grey."

"Wait a minute." I tell him as I get out of bed. I return and slide in next to him again. "Look. Remember this?" I ask. I hold up a fine gold bracelet with a single small gold charm on it. The charm is a small baby shoe. Christian takes it and looks at it.

"I gave this to you. It was my first Christmas gift to you."

"Yes it was. You got up Christmas morning and while I put my head in the toilet you fixed me some hot tea and dry toast. I climbed back in bed and when you brought it to me you had a small package on the tray. I unwrapped it and it was this bracelet with the baby shoe. I don't think I've ever loved you more. But the topper was that you sent Charlie Tango down and had Ray brought back to Seattle to spend Christmas with us. You made it one of the best days of my life."

"I couldn't let you be sad on Christmas day. It was bad enough you were still throwing up, I couldn't have you be homesick on top of it."

"It was our first and last Christmas by ourselves. The next year we had Teddy."

"God what a Christmas that was," he shakes his head.

"You bought every toy in town." I remind him. " He wasn't even a year old and we had Toys 'R Us under the tree. I think I ended up giving most of it away. Remember he tried to eat the ribbons? I looked over and he had red ribbon gnawing on it and his little mouth was all red with red drool running down his face."

"I know I thought you were going to rush him to the emergency room." He laughs. "For what red ribbon poisoning?"

"Well, it could have been dangerous for him to try to eat that. I was a new mother, I had no idea. He survived me though."

"He survived because of you," he tells me. "You're such a good mother, Anastasia."

"I had no clue. I kept thinking the baby police would show up and take him away from us. You're mother just kept telling us to relax and Teddy would be fine. Actually I'm surprised we survived," I snort.

"Then Grace came," he recalls. " I remember that Christmas morning. We hadn't had her but a couple of months. We were both operating on about two hours of sleep, because Teddy had to get up before dawn to see if Santa had been there. I had gone in the kitchen to get a cup of coffee and you a cup of tea. I walked back in the family room and Teddy was under the tree ripping through everything. You were on the sofa in your robe and night gown and you were nursing Grace just watching Teddy. It was perfection. I never thought it could get any better. Christmas morning with my wife, my son and my new daughter. I wanted to cry it was just so overwhelming. I had never dreamed it could be like that for me. "

"For us, Christian. For both of us." I lean over and wrap both of my arms around him tighter.

"I love you so much. I know it's still August, but , Merry Christmas, Mr. Grey."

"Merry Christmas, Mrs. Grey."

**~~Merry Christmas Every One~~**


	37. Chapter 37

_**Fifty Shades…Full Circle**_

_**Chapter 37**_

_**Back to our story….**_

"Mom!" Teddy races to the foyer and launches himself at me as Christian and I walk through the door.

Dropping to my knees I hug him tight, "Hey baby. I missed you."

"I missed you too, Mom."

JackO is jumping on us and barking incessantly. Christian bends down and picks him up trying to calm him down.

"Mama. Daddy. You home." Grace is close behind and gives me a huge hug. "I misth you mama."

"I missed you too sweetheart." I give her a big kiss. She grins up at Christian, "I misth you too Daddy. I gwad you home. Bwing me a pwresent?" she asks.

Christian puts JackO on the floor and picks Grace up. Giving her a kiss, "I brought Mommy home. Is that present enough?" he asks her. She just gives him a scowl.

"Ana. Mr. Grey. It's good to have you home."

"Thanks Gail. I'm sorry we kept Taylor so long," I apologize.

"Oh, that's okay. I had the kids. We kept each other company." She looks down at the jumping, yapping dog. "JackO. Sit!" Amazingly the dog sits down and doesn't move.

"How did you get him to do that?" Christian asks.

"Oh, we just had a come to Jesus meeting while you were gone. We've been on good terms since then," she tells him.

"That's amazing. He won't do anything for me, except bark and bounce," he says.

"Okay, guys. I'm going upstairs and get changed and I'll be back down. Gail. Go home to Taylor and enjoy the weekend. Mr. Grey and I'll take it from here."

"Yes, ma'am. I have some dinner in the fridge, so you shouldn't have to cook this evening. Just heat it up. Call if you need anything and if not, I'll see you bright and early Monday morning."

"Thanks again for watching them Gail," Christian offers.

"No problem Mr. Grey." She turns to leave and stops. "Oh. There was a bunch of stuff delivered for you from SAP. I had them put it in your office, Ana."

"Okay thanks. It must be all the equipment. They were going to overnight it."

"I'll get Barney to come out Monday and get it set up for you, Babe." Christian tells me.

"Okay. You kids watch TV or go outside and Dad and I'll be back down as soon as we get changed."

"I put your bags in your room." Sawyer tells us.

"Thanks, Sawyer. I appreciate it. And thanks for sticking with me this week." I give his arm squeeze much to Christian's displeasure.

"No problem Mrs. Grey."

Christian grabs my waist and we ascend the staircase to go up to our room.

"Wow. This looks good. Liz did a great job." I tell Christian.

"I intend to use that bed tonight. I've been saving it," he tells me.

"I can't wait. Actually I'd love to just sink into a hot tub, but I guess I can wait until after dinner and we get the kids to sleep."

After getting out of my clothes and into my jeans and a T-shirt I walk out of my dressing room and see Christian changing. All he has on is his jeans, and they still hang on his hips in a way that makes my heart race. That 'V' makes me want to drop to my knees and devour what is nestled just below it. Maybe later. I wrap my arms around him as he looks through his drawer for a T-shirt to put on.

I kiss his back. "I love your body," I whisper against his skin as I run my hands over his abdomen.

"It's all yours baby," he grins.

"Can we play tonight?" I ask as I rub my cheek across his back.

"Are you sure? With your arm?" he asks.

"Yes. I'm sure. Be creative. We can work around the cast," I press my lips to the skin on his shoulders.

"Have anything particular in mind?" he asks as he turns around to face me.

"Nope. I put myself in your hands. I'll trust you to come up with something."

"I have visions of an early bed time for the kids," he grins. "Let's go see what they're in to." He takes my waist and we head back down to find the rest of the Grey family.

As we hit the landing JackO runs to us followed close behind by Teddy. Christian looks down at the little yapping ball of fur. "Sit. JackO sit." He pays no attention to Christian, what so ever.

"Dad, he only does that for Gail." Teddy tells him.

"How does she get him to do it?" Christian asks him.

Teddy shrugs, "I don't know. She was in the kitchen and JackO was jumping and barking at her and he jumped up and grabbed her skirt and ripped a hole in it and ever since then he does what she tells him to."

"I imagine Mrs. Taylor laid down the law," I tell him.

"Yep. That and she makes him snacks." Teddy tells us.

"Snacks?" I ask.

"She makes him some kind of dog cookies. He likes 'em."

I put my arm around my son and pull him to me, "Come in the den and tell me what you have been up to."

"Nothing much. I just been playing with Jack and helpin' Gail." Christian and I sit on the couch and Christian pulls Teddy in his lap and hugs him.

"Dad, can I go to work with you?" Teddy asks Christian.

Christian looks surprised, "Well. I guess so if you want to. Let me find a day that I don't have a lot of meetings and you can come spend the day with me and see everything."

"Me thoo, me thoo, "Grace gets off the floor and runs over jumping on the sofa between Christian and me. "I wan go whif Dada, thoo."

Pulling her over into my lap I try to explain," Baby, you've been to Daddy's office before. Why don't we let Teddy go spend the day with Daddy? Mommy will be working at home now; you can come sit with me while I work if you want to."

"What you do Mama?" she asks me.

"Well, I read things that people write and decide if they need to be made into a book. Then I help them get the book made. Does that sound fun?"

"No." she shakes her head. "Not vewy fun. Dada hasth a big bwilding and pepo awl ober."

"Well, I don't need a big building and lots of people to do what I do. I work by myself. " I tell her. "I like it that way." I run my hand through her hair, "Besides I get to stay at home and be with you all day."

"I go whif Dada."

"Well, maybe another time. You don't need to both go together. Daddy wouldn't get anything done trying to watch both of you."

"I wike to watch him fuss at pepo. He make 'em wook funny," she grins over at her dad.

"Daddy, doesn't fuss at people," Teddy corrects her, "he makes them do what they're supposed to do."

"Dada can't make Jack do wha he opposth a do."

"Okay. You two. If people that work for me didn't do what I need them to do, I wouldn't have a business for very long. And if I didn't have a business, we wouldn't have this house, or the boat or the plane or Gail and Taylor or anything else we have." Christian tries to explain.

"Dad, can we take Jack for a ride?" Teddy asks completely changing the subject.

"What? In the car?" Christian asks him.

Teddy nods his head. "Yeah. Can we take him for a ride in the car?" he asks again. "And get some ice cream?" His eyes go wide.

"Well I guess so. What do you think about going for a ride, Mom?" Christian asks me.

"Fine with me. It's a nice day." I'm tired and really just want to stay at home with my family and chill, but I've been away for four days and should spend time doing what they want to do.

"Okay, son, go get the leash and we'll go for a short ride. I need to run by the office for a second anyway."

The kids jump down and scatter. "Are you sure you are up to this?" I ask him. "Two children _and _a dog?"

He reaches over and grabs me, "I think I can handle it. They're small."

"That's the worst kind, you know. Small and active and loud."

I get Grace strapped in her car seat and Christian gets Teddy buckled in and evidently JackO needs to be buckled down because Christian has him in a harness which attaches to a seatbelt and he is secured between the kids.

Christian and I slide in the front seat and we take off down the drive and then head toward town. "Why is Jack buckled down ?" I ask Christian.

"The vet said he should be strapped in so he doesn't run around the car and cause an accident or hurt himself," he tells me. "We got a list of stuff we needed when we took him to the vet. I took the kids and JackO to a big pet store and we wandered around and got him his collar and leash and harness and his seatbelt. He needed a bed, which he never uses by the way. And he needed a sweater evidently, and a life jacket for when we go on the boat, and a food and water bowl and a sealed container to keep his food fresh and some chew toys and a few tennis balls…."

"Tennis? Isn't holding the racket a little problematic for him?" I ask.

Christian rolls his eyes at me, "No, he runs after them and brings them back to you to throw again….and again….and again." He grins, "And I'll add that smart remark to the list for tonight.

"That pet store sure saw you coming," I giggle.

"Well evidently dogs need a lot more stuff than you'd think."

"Have you built him his own room yet?" I ask.

"Nope. He wouldn't stay in it anyway. He prefers to be with us." He grins over at me.

The drive into town is nice. The weather is sunny and warm. My kids are happy and safe. My husband is in a good mood. I feel content and just sit back and enjoy the beautiful day.

We finally get into town and pull into the garage at Grey House and Christian whips into the first reserved parking spot marked 'Mr. Grey'.

"Where's the guy that parks the car, Dad?" Teddy asks.

"It's Saturday. There isn't anyone to park the car on Saturday." Christian tells him.

"Why not?" Teddy asks.

"Because Saturday is not an official work day. We don't have visitors on Saturday."

"Why are we here?" he asks.

"Because I need to talk to someone for a minute," he tells him. "Get Jack's leash and hold on to him. We don't need him running off downtown."

Christian and I get out and I grab Grace out of her car seat and Christian unbuckles Teddy and grabs Jack's leash before he hops out of the car on his own. The five of us walk to the glass entry door and Christian punches in the code to get in the building. The only person in the lobby is Washington the weekend security guard. He is at the security desk and surprised to see us.

"Mr. Grey. I wasn't aware you'd be in today," he jumps to attention and give us a smile.

"Didn't plan on it. We'll just be here a few minutes. Is Welch in his office?" Christian asks.

"Yes sir, I believe so. He's been here several hours. Shall I let him know you're here?" he asks.

"No, he knows I was on my way in."JackO is sniffing at everything as we make our way to the elevator.

"Mrs. Grey. Nice to see you again." Washington nods at me.

"Nice to see you. Are you doing well?" I relpy.

"Yes ma'am, just fine thank you. Looks like you have the whole crew today."

"Hi Mr. Washington," Teddy waves as he follows us through the security gate.

"Hewo, Mistha Waston," Grace gives him a little wave and a smile as I drag her behind me through the gate.

Christian holds the elevator door as his little family gathers inside, then he puts in his key and we are on our way up to the twentieth floor. Jack starts to bark as soon as the elevator begins to ascend. Reaching the administrative floor we all get off and follow Christian toward his office.

"Do you want us to wait out here?" I ask him not knowing why he is here or what he is going to do.

"No. Go on in. I'm going to walk down to see Welch and I'll be back in a couple of minutes."

We all go into Christian's office to wait for him. Grace and Teddy run over and press their faces against the glass wall behind Christian's desk and 'ooo' and 'ahhh' looking down twenty floors.

"Look Mom. Look how high up we are." Teddy yells at me.

"Yes Baby. I know." I tell him. "Be careful. Don't lean against the glass so hard." I pull them away. Even though I know it won't break, it just makes me nervous.

"I'm going to use the bathroom. You two behave and don't get into your father's things. I mean it; don't touch anything." I tell them as I walk into Christian's bathroom and close the door.

When I finish and walk back out, the situation has deteriorated. Grace is in Christian's chair and Teddy is trying to push her out. She has grabbed some papers and is drawing on them. God I hope that's nothing important. "Grace! I told you not to do that," I take them away from her and look at them to see what damage she has done. She starts whining and grabbing for the papers. Teddy finds the model glider on Christian's desk that I gave him years ago and is running through the office playing with it and Jack is on the sofa shaking one of the decorative pillows with his mouth. Good Lord. About that time Christian bursts through the door just in time to grab Teddy and remove the glider from his hand. "Sorry Sport. That's special. You can't play with that."

"But Dad. It's just a plane," he whines.

"It may be just a plane, but your mother gave it to me years ago before we got married and I don't want it broken." He looks over at his sofa and bellows,"JackO! Stop that." Jack immediate stops shaking the pillow that now is almost in shreds.

"This may not have been such a good idea," I tell him. "Was this anything important?" I ask as I iron out the paper with my hands and show him the document Grace has put her 'signature' on.

"Well, it was going to be, Monday morning." He shakes his head. "I'll get Andrea to print off another one."

"Sweetheart, I'm sorry. I just stepped in to use the bathroom for a minute and everything fell apart."

"It's okay. At least we're the only ones here."

"Dad? If Mom gave you that plane before you got married, where did you meet her?" Teddy asks.

"Right here son." Christian sits on the sofa and straightens the feather pillow hat Jack has destroyed. He motions for teddy to come sit next to him. "I was working and your mother came to interview me for her school newspaper. When she walked through that door right there she tripped and fell. When I helped her up, she looked up at me and I knew right then I liked her."

"You did?" he asks. "How did you know? Did she tell you?"

"Well, no not right then. I knew I wanted to see her again and later on she told me I was in love with her."

"Mom's usually right about those things." Teddy agrees with his dad.

"Yes, son. She usually is." Christian stands up, "I need to check on one thing and we can go." He walks over to his desk and picks Grace up out of his chair and flips on his computer. He sits down and puts Grace in his lap and taps away scowling at the screen. After a couple of minutes he closes it and stands up. "Okay. Is everyone ready to go?" he asks as he tries to wipe the finger and nose prints off of his window with his shirt sleeve.

"Before we go, does anyone have to use the bathroom?" I ask. No one volunteers.

"Okay. Let's head out and get some ice cream." Christian grabs jack's leash and carries Grace while I corral Teddy.

"Christian?" I ask and he turns around. "What about that mess?" I nod toward the shredded pillow .

"Andrea will take care of it Monday morning." He turns and opens the door holding it for Teddy and me to walk out and head to the elevators.

We descend and head back out to the car waving goodbye to Washington on the way. Once we are all strapped in we pull out of the garage and back into traffic.

"There's a lot of traffic in town for a Saturday." I mention as we navigate the crowded street.

"Seems to be." Christian mentions.

"Christian Stop!" I yell.

"What?" he asks hysterically.

"Stop."

"Ana, I can't just stop. There is traffic behind me. What is it?" he asks.

"Go around the block and come back." I tell him.

"Ana. What's wrong?" he asks.

"I saw Daddy's car parked over there."

"What? It can't be his car. You must be mistaken." He carefully navigates the block for me and we are back.

"No. That's it. See? The license plate says 'Ray 1'. That's daddy's car. Pull over."

Christian finds a parking spot and quickly pulls in. "Where do you suppose he is?" he asks.

" I don't know. Why in the world is he here and why didn't he tell me he was coming?" I ask. "Let's just sit here a minute. Maybe he'll come out of one of the stores."

"Ana, we could be here all day waiting on him. Call him." He suggests.

I take out my phone and dial Dad's number. "It goes to voice mail." Opening the car door, "I'm going to walk up the street and see if I can see him." I slide out of the car and as soon as I hit the sidewalk I spot him sitting at an outside café eating. He is sitting across from someone, but I can't see who it is. As I get closer he looks up and sees me and the color drains from his face.

"Daddy?" I ask as I approach.

"Annie. What are you doing here?" he asks as he stands up napkin in hand.

"Christian had to go to the office for a few minutes and we were taking the kids for a ride." About the time I reach him I look over to see who his companion is. _Oh, fuck, it's Myra. Oh, shit. Christian will go ballistic. Geez, how do we get out of this one?_

"Myra!" I look down at her eating her meal.

"Umm. Umm. Mrs. Grey…. I uh….. Mrs. Grey."

About that time Christian walks up kids and dog in tow. "Ray. We thought that was your car. What are you doing in tow…..n?" he looks down at Myra. "Myra?"

"Yes. It's Myra." Ray says. "Me and Myra are having lunch. Anything wrong with that?" he asks almost irritated.

"I'm just surprised, that's all Daddy. We had no idea." I stammer.

"Yes. This is a surprise." Christian says.

"Well, I wasn't ready to tell you yet, but since you stumbled up on us, I guess now is a pretty good time. I been seein' Myra here for a bit."

"Grandpa Ray, is Myra your girlfriend?" Teddy asks.

"Hush Teddy." Christian and I say in unison.

"Daddy, would you like to come over to the house when you get finished eating?" I ask.

"Well, no. Actually I have plans this evening," he tells me bluntly.

"Mrs. Grey, Mr. Grey, I don't know what to say," Myra says. She looks like she want to throw up her lunch.

"You don't have to explain nuthin', Myra," Daddy says to her. "I'll take care of it."

"How about if I come over tomorrow, before I head back? We can talk then." He asks.

"Well I guess that's okay. We'll let you two finish lunch and I guess we'll just see you tomorrow, then." I tell him.

"Afternoon," he says. "Tomorrow afternoon."

"Okay. Tomorrow afternoon." We all turn to walk back to the car and Daddy sits back down to finish his lunch. I'm stunned. Getting everyone back in to the car. "I don't know what to say." I tell Christian.

"Well I know what to say," I can tell he is furious. "She better not show up to work Monday. This is way out of bounds and she knows it." He throws the car into reverse and screeches out into traffic. "Does Gail know about this?" he asks.

I shake my head. "I doubt it Sweetheart. I can't imagine that she would approve of this. Christian I'm so sorry. I had no idea." I look over at him to see his hand raking through his hair.

"This is so inappropriate, I don't even know where to start," he growls.

"Are Grandpa Ray and Myra going to get married?" Teddy asks.

"NO!" we both tell him.


	38. Chapter 38

_**Fifty Shades…Full Circle**_

_**Chapter 38**_

**A/N: Mature content alert. We haven't had one of these chapters in a while. But then, they are the Greys.**

* * *

"Okay nobody touches anything until we get cleaned up," Christian announces as we get all 'three' children out of the car. "There is ice cream everywhere."

"Oooo, sticky," I scowl as I grab Grace's hand to keep her from touching everything on her way into the house. "I can't believe I was out of baby wipes."

"JackO. Come on," Christian orders and he scurries through the door into the kitchen.

We stop in the kitchen and I pick Grace up and put her hands under the running water in the sink, then wet a paper towel and wipe her face and Christian repeats the process with Teddy.

"I'll get Taylor to have the car detailed on Monday," Christian says.

"Our Saturday outings seem to be hard on the car," I laugh.

"Hmmm." Is all I get back from him.

"Okay, everyone go find something to do until dinner time," I announce as I shoo the kids out of the kitchen. "How about we go pile up on the sofa and watch some TV. Maybe it will take our minds off of everything for a while," I suggest as I mop up the watery mess around the sink.

"Sure." He replies. "I'm going to put a pot of coffee on."

Grabbing the remote I turn the TV on and stake out my territory on the sofa, lying down in a fetal position. Christian follows in a few minutes and he sits down at the opposite end throwing his bare feet on the coffee table and sipping his coffee. He has a hand full of crackers that he is eating with his coffee. "Hey, could you get Gail to make some more of these? They're pretty good."

"What is it?" I look over and ask.

"I don't know. Some sort of cheese cracker thing. They're in a canister on the counter in the kitchen."

"I have no idea what they are, sweetheart, but I'll check with her Monday and ask about them for you."

"Come here," he pulls my bare feet over into his lap and begins to rub them. "I didn't mean to get so bent out of shape about Myra and Ray. I can't help it, it's just how I was raised. Family doesn't get involved with the staff. You know how I feel about that. I know you must be pretty speechless."

"God, you're so 'Upstairs, Downstairs'. And yes. Dad hasn't really dated since he and Mom separated. I'm just surprised that he is seeing anyone, much less Myra."

"Sweetheart, I'm sure he has dated since your mom, you probably just never knew about it," he mumbles as he crunches down on his cheese crackers.

"I think he would have told me if he had," I explain.

"Baby. He's a guy. He isn't going to discuss it with his daughter."

"I don't want to talk about it." I cut him off. "Christian, how in the world can I manage Myra, when she is dating my father?"

"That's why it's inappropriate. That's why I don't allow management to date staff at the office. That and I don't want any sexual harassment suites floating around."

"But what are we going to do? Gail can't manage this place by herself and take care of the kids anymore. I can't fire Myra just because she is dating my father."

"Why not?' he asks popping another cracker into his mouth.

"Because I like her. She does a good job and she and Gail get along so well." I tell him. "Shit this just fucks everything up."

"Got quite a mouth on you today, don't you?" he smiles over at me.

"It's nothing any worse than you've ever said."

"I can't believe Ray actually asked her out. He shouldn't have done that," he shakes his head. "I mean that's just the way it is. You don't get involved with the house staff. It's just not done."

"Christian, Ray has never had house staff. I'm sure he had no idea that it was against protocol to ask her out."

"Probably right," he takes a sip of coffee.

I can hear the kids running and squealing through the house and JackO barking as he keeps up with his kids. His nails make a tapping noise on the hardwood as he runs after them. I can hear them getting closer. "Here they come. Get ready," I warn him. They hit the family room like a whirlwind breaking the relative quiet we were enjoying.

"Hey, Ana. Look at that." Christian nudges me.

Raising my head up I look over to see JackO sitting up on his hind legs looking at Christian as if he were a giant sirloin.

"How'd you get him to do that?" I ask.

"I have no idea. He just ran over and sat up." Christian is smiling from ear to ear at the dog's new trick. "Good boy." Christian gushes at the dog, "Yes, you're my smart boy aren't you?"

Grace runs over to the sofa and leans into Christian's lap looking up at her dad. "Dada. Why you eatin' Jacks cookies?"

"What?" Christian asks her.

"You eatin' Jack's cookies, Dada." She repeats. "Gaygay makes him dog cookies."

I can't help but grab my stomach and start to belly laugh. "I'll make sure Gail makes you some more, baby." I can hardly get out through the laughter. "That's why he's sitting there staring at you. You're eating all his cookies." I'm trying to catch my breath, but I can't stop laughing.

"Go ahead and laugh. I'll get it out of you later," he says so deadpan.

"Well sweetheart, I'm sure she uses good ingredients. I'm sure they're safe to eat." I try to calm him down. "If you like them, thennnn jjjust eeeattt tthem," I can't help but start to laugh again.

Grace is laughing at him too, in her three year old way, "Dada eatin' Jack's food. Dat's funny Dada."

"Dad, why did you eat Jack's treats?" Teddy asks as he walks over to see what is going on.

"I didn't know they were Jack's treats…Okay? They tasted good, so I ate them. Enough said about it. And this doesn't leave this house, understand me?" he tries to nip it in the bud. "Here." Bending down he places the remaining biscuits in front of the dog who makes quick work of devouring them.

"No Dad." Teddy corrects him. "You tell him to sit and when he does it, _then_ you give him one."

"Is that how Gail got him to sit?" he asks as he makes a sour face and tries to wash away the remnants of the cookie with his coffee.

Teddy nods his head. "Yep."

* * *

"Mmmm, I like you like that," I hear Christian whisper as he strokes the top of my head. "Stand up." He extends his hand to help me off of my knees. Grabbing my braid he pulls my head back so that he now has access to my mouth. "As promised, an evening of playtime." The warmth of his breath as his lips brush against mine makes me want to take his mouth, but he doesn't allow it. Instead, he teases me only implying that he is going to kiss me. "Not yet. I'll kiss you when I'm ready to. You've been a bad girl today and you need to be punished first." He walks around me, crop in hand and he taps it against the backs of my knees as he circles behind me. "Tell me what you did to displease me today."

"I used bad language, sir."

"Yes. And…?"

"I'm not sure, sir."

"Think harder," he demands as the crop snaps against my butt.

"I allowed our children to misbehave in your office, sir." I try hard to think.

"Hmm. Yes you did." He replies. "They made quite a mess while you left them alone. What else?"

I try to think. "Think about it Anastasia. Think hard." He whispers against my ear as he stands behind me. "Didn't you make fun of me?"

"Yes, sir. I did. I laughed at you when you…" I have to bite my lip and I can feel myself needing to laugh, "when you….you ate the dog's food." I can feel my body as it begins to tremble trying to suppress a laugh.

"You seem to think that's funny, Anastasia." He growls as he places the crop under my chin and tilts my head up. "Why do you think that's humorous?"

"I don't sir. I don't think it's funny."

"Perhaps _you'd_ like to eat a few dog cookies."

"No sir. Unless it pleases you."

"I think it would. I think it would please me very much." He walks over to a bowl he has brought up and retrieves a dog biscuit. "Open." He tells me. I comply by opening my mouth. He strokes my bottom lip with his thumb before he places the edge of the dog treat between my teeth. "Now bite." Again I comply and bite off a piece of the dog treat. "Now chew and swallow."

I start to crunch the treat and actually it is pretty good. Cheesy, like a cheese cracker. Needs a little salt, but pretty tasty.

"Is that good Anastasia?"

"Yes, sir."

"So you were wrong to laugh."

"Yes sir. I was wrong. I apologize. Do you want me to eat the rest of it?" I ask.

"Did I tell you to eat the rest of it?"

"No sir."

He takes my wrists and begins to gently bind them in front of me with a silk scarf. "Are you okay?" he softly whispers as he binds my wrist to the one with the cast.

"Yes, sir. That doesn't hurt. Thank you."

"Now what I want is you back on your knees." He takes my bound hands and steadies me as I lower myself back down. As he unzips his tattered, soft jeans, I notice he is commando and his erection escapes from its denim restraint. "If you're so anxious to put something in your mouth, you can have this." He steps over to sit on the edge of the bed his jeans pooling around his ankles, and I scoot over on my knees to settle between his thighs. Without hesitation I take him in my mouth using my tongue to spread moisture over his member.

"That's right," he growls. I can see his eyes close and his breath hitches as I take his full length, well most of it. Gliding my tongue up the underside I reach the tip and circle it over and over flicking the underside.

Glancing out of the corner of my eye, I see Jack sitting on the chair watching our every move. "Sir. He's watching me."

"What are you talking about? Just don't stop what you are doing," he growls.

"But sir, he's watching. I can't do this with him here. It makes me nervous."

"What the fuck are you talking about?" He grumbles. Finally looking over at the canine, "Oh. I see what you mean." Christian gets up and takes Jack out of the chair and puts him in his dressing room, "Go get in your bed. Go." He commands as he closes the door.

Returning he sits back down, "Now. No more excuses."

I resume my task of taking him in my mouth and gliding my tongue over him.

"Fuck, that feels good." He grumbles down at me as he places his hand behind my head and fists my hair. He guides my head to move up and down his length. I want to take it slower and savor him, but he is insistent and sets the pace. He moves his other hand to my head, using both hands to guide my movements. I can feel him as his hips begin to roll pushing himself farther into me. "God, that feels so fucking good. Don't stop. Harder." He commands.

I can feel his body as it begins to tremble and his breathing begins to become ragged. "That's my girl." He whispers. "Oh, fuck!" he growls as he tenses and then folds over me and begins to shudder. I swallow hard and try to catch my breath as he rides out his release. He finally begins to relax and breathe again. Yanking my braid he tilts my head up and seals his mouth over mine. Our tongues dance as his lips glide across mine and I know he can taste himself on me.

"That was exceptional," he growls, "but I'm not finished with you." As he stands he kicks off his jeans and lifts me by my upper arms to a standing position. He then hooks his fingers in the waistband of my panties and slides my white silk garment down my legs and off. Gasping, my tummy quivers momentarily as he quickly glides his fingers back and forth across the wet flesh nestled between my thighs. Stopping as quickly as he started, his wet fingers glide across my lips and then slide into my mouth. They are soon replaced by his lips and tongue. I want to put my arms around him so badly, but they remain bound by the silk scarf. His mouth moves from mine and glides over my cheek finding my neck. My body feels like it is on fire. The kisses he is leaving on my skin are wet and warm and they lead down to my breast which he kisses and nuzzles, finally taking it into his mouth. My breathing becomes ragged and course and I wince as he pulls and sucks hard on the tender erect skin. It's almost painful, but not quite. I can feel the sting of his palm as it makes contact with my naked behind, and I gasp with surprise.

"Don't move." He growls and smacks me again as he bites my tender nipple. He takes my other breast in his hand and twists and pulls my nipple, then moves his mouth to caress it with his tongue. As his other hand again slides between my thighs he aggressively strokes me as he tortures my breasts with his mouth.

My knees want to buckle beneath me , but he holds me tight. As I am about to reach my pleasure threshold, he stops and steadies me on my feet. "Wait here. Don't move." He tells me.

"Yes, sir." I barely get out.

He soon returns with a set of nipple clamps connected by a chain and decorated with beads. He bends his head down and sucks my nipple hard to get it erect and then he gently places a clamp on it. He repeats the process with my other breast, then tugs on the chain that connects them just to watch me flinch. Once he has completed, he again slides his fingers between my thighs, this time sliding them into me circling and thrusting. "Oh, God." I whisper as I let my head fall back.

"Not yet," he whispers against my throat. "I'm not satisfied that you've been punished enough."

He sits down on the edge of the bed and pulls me face down over his lap, my head resting on the bed and his leg over mine securing them. He braces my back with one palm and I can feel him stroke the skin of my behind. His hand is warm and soft, almost comforting, but I know what is coming. He hasn't spanked me in a while and he has been wanting to. His hand leaves my skin and I brace for the sting that follows.

"Oh, fuck yes," I can hear him gasp. His erection is beginning to grow underneath me as he gently glides his hand over my skin. "You've been bad Anastasia. I'll need to make you see the error of your ways. Do you understand?" he asks.

"Yes, sir. I understand." I whimper.

"You need to learn to respect me," he tells me as he continues to rub my butt. "I won't tolerate your smart mouth. Do you understand?"

"Yes, sir. I understand." I manage to get out. Then, the next slap against my flesh as he brings his palm down on me. "Oww." Damn that really smarts.

"Quiet. I'll stop when I'm satisfied you're pink enough. You're getting there, but not to my liking yet," he adds. His fingers slip between my thighs and I can feel him begin to stroke again, over and over, faster and faster driving me insane. "You want to come don't you?" he asks.

"Yes. Please." I can feel my body beginning to quiver as he centers his attention on my wet flesh. I need to come so badly right now.

Stopping again he bends over and whispers in my ear, "Not yet." He strikes me several more times before releasing me. Then he lays me on the bed on my back bending my legs upward toward my chest. He strikes each butt cheek hard and then gently kisses each one to diminish the sting. I feel so exposed, so spread out and bared. "Oh fuck," I gasp as his mouth makes contact between my thighs. I'm already so sensitive; so ready for him. I needed to come fifteen minutes ago and I'm desperate and wanting.

Christian shows me no mercy as he devours me. His tongue is exquisite torture as it moves over me. My belly shudders and I can feel myself begin to relax as my release begins to take hold, only to have him stop and move from me. Shit! It's gone. "Ohhh, FUCK, Christian!" I growl at him.

I can see a hint of a grin on his face as I look up at him, "I'm sir to you until I tell you otherwise. And you'll come when I'm ready." Grabbing my legs he pulls me to the edge of the bed and I can feel him as he urgently fills me. "Oh god." I gasp.

"Any complaints now?" he growls as he begins to roll his hips moving forcefully in and out. "Answer me."

"No, sir. None." I whimper. I can feel myself reaching the precipice again. My body is on fire aching for him, needing him, wanting him. I give myself over to him. I just want him to take me and do what he wants to with me. Do anything he wants.

"Come on baby. Come for me," he commands between ragged breaths. "Let me see you come."

I can't hold back and I feel myself relax and my toes wiggle just before I give it all to him. My body begins to tremble as I look up into his eyes. I can feel the pulling in my belly that spreads to my groin as I explode around him.

"That's my girl. I want to watch you," he is able to get out as I see him begin to tense. His head arches backward as he falls over me shuddering and burying his head in my neck; his body is consumed by his release. "Fuck, Anastasia," he growls into my neck as he shudders against me.

We both come back to earth and I can feel his breath on my neck as he brushes the wet hair out of my eyes. "I love you," he whispers and smiles down at me. Pulling my legs up I wrap them around his waist and keep him pulled next to me.

"Ouch," he winces as he raises up on one elbow. "This hurts." He gently removes the nipple clamps one at a time and sweetly kisses the skin they had held, then tosses the clamps and chain on the nightstand. "Take a bath with me," he murmurs.

"Okay." I reach up and gently brush my lips against his. As he leaves me and sits up, I hold my bound wrists up to him. He gives me a sly grin and grabs the knotted scarf with his teeth pulling on it until it loosens and he continues untying it with his teeth until I am free of it.

Christian gets up and walks to the bathroom and I watch him, savoring every flex of every muscle in his body as he moves. As the water runs into the tub I drag myself off of the bed and into the bathroom where Christian is pouring scented bath oil into the foaming water. I pull my hair up and fasten it with a clip then walk over to him and hold my cast out with a zip lock bag in the other hand, "Will you help me?" I ask.

He stands up and takes the bag out of my hand sliding it over my cast and wrapping it tight. Then he tears a piece of tape and wraps it around the edge of the bag securing it to my arm making my cast water tight. "There. That'll keep your broken wing dry." He kisses my fingers through the plastic bag. I put my arms around him as we watch the tub finish filling.

"May I stop referring to you as 'sir' now?" I smile up at him.

"Have you learned your lesson?" he grins at me.

"Yes. I believe I have, Mr. Grey, sir." I tease.

"Well then you are finished, but only until next time." He hugs me and kisses my head.

Christian turns off the water and steps over into the tub then holds my hand helping me in. Sitting down into the sweet foam he pulls me in to his lap.

"Ohhh. I've needed this all day." I sigh as I lean back against him. As I feel his soft hands traverse my body and his erection growing against my back, I remember just how much I enjoy being like this. It's one of my absolute favorite places to be.

"Christian, we need to talk about how we are going to handle this Daddy- Myra thing." I remind him as I play with a mound of white bubbles.

"We can talk about it later. Let's just relax a while," he says as he kisses my neck.

Sitting up I turn my head to look at him. I don't need to say a word as I lift my body up and turn to sit facing him. As I sit, I lower myself on to him taking him inside and wrap his neck with my arms. I bury my nose in his neck and rest my head on his shoulder. He wraps me in his arms and kisses my shoulder as he rests his head on me. We sit like this for an eternity. Not speaking. Not moving. Just breathing in unison and listening to our hearts beat. The warm water and the quiet are like a drug, relaxing me.

"If we don't move I'm going to fall asleep," Christian murmurs. His head is leaning back against the edge of the tub and his eyes are closed.

"Okay." I whisper as I begin to gently rock my hips against him, still resting my head on his shoulder.

"Mmmm. That's better." He smiles and grumbles. I can feel him begin to grow and expand inside me as I move against him. As I move my relaxed state begins to turn to arousal and I sit up bracing my arms on either side of his head. He cups my butt in his hands as he raises and lowers me on him. It doesn't take long before we both find our release and relax in each other's arms.

"You are going to wear that thing out, Mr. Grey," I smile at him.

"Well since I haven't so far, there's probably not much danger of that," he grins and kisses my nose. "Let's get washed up. We've had the plane trip this morning and then the destruction of my office and running into Ray and Myra, then taking my wife; several times. I'd say it's been a pretty full day and I'm ready for bed."

We emerge from the tub and wrap up in big fluffy white towels to dry off. Christian helps to untape my arm and remove the plastic bag. As I slip into a pale yellow silk gown and Christian dons his pajama bottoms and then releases Jack from his dressing room prison before we slide between our clean sheets in our new bed.

"This is pretty comfortable. I like this new bed." I tell him as I snuggle against him.

"I like that you're with me in the new bed, Mrs. Grey."

I can hear Jack whine as he tries to find a spot at the foot of the bed. "What's wrong with him and why is he on the bed with us?"

"Oh, you're in his spot. He'll get over it," Christian tells me.

"I think you have it wrong. He was in _my_ spot and I'm taking it back."

"I missed you while you were gone. I'm glad you're taking your spot back."

"I missed you too, sweetie. I'm looking forward to our anniversary next Saturday," I tell him.

"Me too. I always look forward to our anniversaries," he assures me as he wraps me in his arms.

"So you'll put it on your calendar for next Saturday?"

"I don't need to put it on my calendar. Have I ever missed an anniversary with you?" he asks.

"Nope. None I can remember. You were there for the initial ceremony and you've been here every year since then. I like that about you."

"Good. 'Cause I intend to be here every year in the future as well. Nothing could keep me away from you on that day, Mrs. Grey. Nothing."


	39. Chapter 39

_**Fifty Shades…Full Circle**_

_**Chapter 39**_

**A/N: I'm posting a day early because it's New Year's Day. Happy New Year everyone and thanks again for reading and reviewing. Wishing a good 2013 for every one of you.**

* * *

I feel arms circle my waist and soft lips brush against my neck as I finish working on breakfast. "Goodness. Who is that?" I ask as I jump.

"Mmm. Just your lord and master and father of your children," Christian teases as he sneaks a piece of freshly cooked bacon.

"Looks like the bacon bandit to me," I tease back as I smack his hand.

"Oh, I see you already have an admirer." Christian says looking down at Jack glued next to me as I cook.

"Yes. He seems to love whoever is in charge of the food." I look down at him. "He's awfully sweet. I'm glad you fished him out of the drink. Probably not as glad as he is, though."

"Me too. He's good company for the kids."

"The kids?" I turn around and look at him. "I'm almost jealous of that dog; you seem so fond of him."

"He can't hold a candle to you Mrs. Grey." He sneaks another piece of bacon as I swat at his hand. "He can't cook nearly as well as you can."

"Go call the kids. I'll get everything on the table."

After getting Teddy and Grace situated and milk poured for them and coffee for Christian, I finally get to sit down and relax while I eat breakfast with my family. JackO is sitting up on hind legs staring at Christian as he sneaks him a piece of bacon.

"Christian. Should you be feeding him that bacon?" I ask.

"Why not? He likes it. Surely a little bacon wouldn't hurt him," he sips his coffee.

"If you keep that up he'll be begging at the table all the time," I remind him.

"Oh, I guess you're right. It just makes him happy."

"It makes you happy, Christian Grey. One more creature that you can control." I sneer at him.

"Yes. Dogs do make good submissives I guess," he shrugs.

"What's a..a subhissis, Dad?" Teddy asks stuffing pancakes in to his already full mouth.

"Yeah, what's 'at?" Grace repeats.

"Well?" I cock my head and look at him.

"Someone who is submissive is willing to submit to the wishes of another; do their bidding without question," he looks at me " and enjoy it." He looks over at Teddy, "And don't stuff your mouth."

"Huh?" Teddy says.

"It's someone who does what they are told without question. Unlike my children." He smirks at them.

Grace violently shakes her head," Yeah. I no hissives."

I reach over and wipe her mouth with her napkin, "No, Gracie girl, no one could ever accuse you of being submissive."

Jack barks and Christian hands him another piece of bacon. "I think it's you who's submissive, Mr. Grey," I smirk at him.

"Yeah, Dad. You do whatever Jack wants." Teddy grins at his Dad through his milk moustache.

"Whatever," Christian shakes his head and resumes eating his pancakes. "Wipe your mouth, son."

* * *

"What time is your dad coming over…or is he?" Christian asks as I finish combing out my hair and putting on a touch of make-up.

"I haven't heard from him, so I'm not sure. But if he said he'd be over this afternoon, I assume he will."

As I walk over to the bed to make it up, Christian walks to the other side to help. I spread up the sheet and blanket and tuck it in. He watches my every move and tries to copy it, not proficient at making a bed. "Just take the edges and tuck it in under the mattress. Like that." Then as I grab the duvet and pull it up he mirrors me on his side and continues as I fluff the pillows and place them at the head of the bed. Walking to the bench at the end of the bed I grab a decorative pillow in each hand, as does he, and I toss them up to the pillows in the shams. "Just toss them. It'll look fine." I grab two more.

"I don't know why we have to have all these pillows. We don't use them. Just take them off before we go to bed and put them back on when we get up."

"Because if we didn't have them, I couldn't do this." I smack him in the head with one of the down and linen pillows and he frowns as he hair flies all over his head.

Looking as calm and collected as he can, "I suppose you thought that was funny."

Giggling, "Actually. Yes I did. I thought it was quite funny." I raise the pillow again to repeat the assault and he grabs my wrist and restrains me. Grabbing me around my waist he pulls me off of my feet holding me on his hip in one arm. He sits on the bed and throws me across his knees and begins to beat me with the fluffy pillow.

"No! Stop! Christian stop it!" I can help but giggle as I squirm around on his lap.

"So, is this funny?" he asks as he continues to assault me from my head to my ass.

"No, it's not funny." I giggle. " Stop!" I can't stop laughing. My hair is flying everywhere.

"Grace! Dad's spanking Mom!" I hear Teddy yell as he walks in to see what the fuss is about. As he runs toward us, "Dad what are you doing?" he asks.

Christian responds by smacking him on the head with the pillow, "You're mother has been a bad girl and she needed a spanking," he tells his son.

"Teddy! Save me." I yell. "Help me Teddy." Christian continues to smack my behind with the pillow as Teddy runs around and climbs on the bed and jumps on Christian's back grabbing him around the neck. "Stop Daddy. Stop!"

Grace appears around the corner with the dog and she runs over to join the fray. "Mama, I sabe you," she giggles as she pulls on Christian's shirt sleeve. Christian stops hitting me and Grabs grace up in his arms falling over on the bed as he kisses her tummy. "No Dada. Don't tickie me!" she giggles. Teddy is stuck like glue to Christian's neck as he continues to tickle Grace. As I try to get up he wraps his legs around my waist holding me tight. I pretend to fight him off and scream, "Get him kids. Make him stop." Jack is now barking to beat the band adding to the chaos. After a few moments we stop to catch our breath, all of us lying in a heap on the bed.

"Dad you're stronger than all of us," Teddy marvels.

"Yes son, and you need to remember that." Christian tries to act so serious.

"What did Mom do that she had to have a spanking?" Teddy asks still heaving to catch his breath.

"Whatever it was, I forgive her," Christian says as he rolls over and kisses me.

"Well, it looks like we'll have to make the bed again," I smile over at him.

* * *

The kids are running in the back yard and throwing a tennis ball that Jack is retrieving, over and over again. Christian and I are on the patio watching them and drinking a bottle of wine. "I just love summer. It's so nice to get my bones warm," I tell him.

"I'll warm your bones," He grins over.

"It's not my bones you are interested in, Mr. Grey," I grin back.

"Hey, hey. I love every little bone in your body, madam," he takes another sip of his wine.

"I wonder what time Daddy will be here?" I mention. "I have no idea what to say to him."

"I guess we'll just hear what he has to say about it," Christian says. Teddy throws the ball for Jack and it accidentally goes over the fence and into the lake. Jack barks and barks at the loss of his ball.

"Well I guess I'd better go retrieve that ball before JackO wets himself over it," he says as he lifts himself out of the chair and heads down to the gate. Opening it he is closely followed by jack and the kids. "Go get it." Christian motions to Jack.

Jack looks longingly at the yellow fuzzy ball, but won't set foot in the water. He continues to bark at it. "Go on. Go get." Christian encourages him, but Jack doesn't budge.

Finally Christian takes off his shoes and rolls up his jeans legs and wades out into the water to get the ball. He tosses it back over the fence and the kids and Jack run back up to the yard. Christian locks the gate and ambles back up to his chair sitting back down and draining his wine glass.

"That was nice. Do you need a towel for your feet?" I ask.

"No thanks. I tried to get Jack to go get the ball, but he wouldn't set foot in the water."

"Do you blame him? He almost drown out there. I wouldn't go back out in it either if I was him."

"Yeah. I guess it must have been pretty scary for him. He's such a little guy and that must have seemed like an ocean to him."

"I can't believe someone just tossed him out in it."

"We don't know that's what happened. He could have wandered out there and couldn't swim back. Lake Washington is a huge lake and that current can be pretty fierce sometimes. As well as all the boats going back and forth."

"I know, I just feel sorry for him. Well at least it turned out well. He has a good home and we have a good dog." I smile over at him. "Want another glass?"

"Yes. Thanks." He passes me his glass and I refill it for him emptying the bottle.

"I think I hear a car out front. Maybe it's Daddy," I stand to go see who it is. Peeking out through the front window I can see Daddy's car pulling up and parking. Luckily he seems to be by himself. I run back to the patio. "Sweetheart, Daddy is here. He's by himself."

"Okay. Just have him come out here. I hate to make the kids come in."

I pull the door open before he can ring the bell. "Daddy. I'm so glad to see you." I throw my arms around his neck.

"It's good to see you Annie. How's my girl?"

"I'm good. Come on in. Christian and the kids are out back. Go on out and I'll bring you a cup of coffee. Unless you'd rather have a beer?"

"I think I will take a beer," he says as he heads for the patio.

When I reach the patio I hand Daddy a cold beer and set another bottle of wine on the table after I pour myself a fresh glass.

"So, Daddy. What brings you to Seattle?" I awkwardly try to open the conversation.

"Well, I think that's fairly obvious. I came to see Myra," he holds up his hand before either of us can say anything. "Now I know there is some sort of problem with me going out with her. I never knew that would be an issue until Myra explained it all to me. I just took a liking to her while I was here and called and asked if I could take her out. She didn't want to at first. She said it wouldn't be proper. But I kept workin' on her until she agreed to have lunch with me. We've been seeing each other since then."

"I see. Well, Myra was right. There is a bit of an issue with that Ray." Christian starts as he rubs his hand over his face. "You see as her employer it really isn't appropriate for her to become involved with any of the family."

"Why?" Daddy asks. "Isn't she good enough?"

"No, Ray . That's not the issue. You see, this is Myra's workplace. In the workplace it isn't appropriate for management to become involved with people who work for them. It can be misconstrued as sexual harassment."

"Myra don't work for me," Daddy says.

"Yes, Ray, I know. But she works for your daughter. Ana has to supervise Myra. It would make it difficult for her to do that if you are dating her."

"Well then I won't date her anymore."

"Oh, Daddy, I don't want to make you unhappy," I put my hand over on his knee.

"Oh, I won't be unhappy. I'll just marry her. Then you won't have to worry about supervising her."

"Oh, Daddy." I gasp. "No. Don't rush into anything because of this. Please take some time and think about it."

"I already thought about it and asked her this weekend. She accepted. Consider me spoken for."

I can feel tears well in my eyes. "Oh, Daddy. How can you do this?"

"What do you mean? I'm a grown man I can make my own decisions. I've been doing it a long time."

"I know. It's just, you never mentioned it. You never told me you were seeing anyone. I never had time to get used to having to share you with anyone." I can't help but to begin to cry.

"Aw, come here baby girl," he motions me to come sit on his lap. "Look Annie, I've been by myself since you left for college. I'm a lonely old man and Myra has brought a little happiness back into my life. You're my baby girl." He kisses my forehead." You'll always be my baby girl and no one will ever take your place. You know that."

"I know. It's just all so sudden." I whimper.

"Annie, I'm getting' up there. I don't have time to waste on all that dating and wooing. I need to get on with it. Myra makes me happy, but what is more of a miracle is that I seem to make her happy too. We enjoy what time we have together. I just want more. You know what I mean?"

"Yes, Daddy. I do understand wanting more." I wipe my tears and give him a smile. "I will say I like Myra….a lot. I just never thought of her as a stepmother, that's all."

"Well, you can still just think of her as Myra. I don't think she wants to be your mother any more than you want her to be."

I nod as I wipe my nose. "Now. Are we all straight?" he asks.

"No. You stole my housekeeper. She was a good one too. I don't know how I'll be able to replace her." I pout.

"Oh, I'm sure you'll find someone. Now give me a smile girl."

I give him a half-assed smile and a hug. "Can you stay for dinner?" I ask.

"I was hoping you'd ask," he grins and gives me a kiss.

"Christian are we good?" he asks my husband.

"Yes, I believe we are. I just wanted to know your intentions toward my housekeeper. I have to take care of my staff. I don't want strange men taking advantage of them." Christian stands and extends his hand. "Congratulations Ray."

As Daddy stands to shake his hand, Christian pulls him onto a hug. "Thank you, son," Daddy slaps Christian on the back.

"I hope you and Myra will be very happy. I'm sure Ana will agree, we'd like for you to have the wedding here, if you'd like to of course," Christian offers.

"I'll ask Myra what she wants and we'll let you know." I can see Daddy wipe his cheek. "Well, looks like you have a new member of the family." He says as he looks out at the kids and Jack.

"Yes. Christian fished him out of the lake last week. I think he decided to stay." I tell him.

"That's one lucky damn dog. He's got a good eye for picking a home."

"Grandpa Ray!" Teddy finally notices that Daddy is here and he runs up to the patio closely followed by JackO and Grace.

Teddy throws his arms around Daddy's neck and gives him a big hug as Grace finally reaches us.

"Gampa Way. You here Gampa Way." She throws herself in his lap and he pulls her up to sit on his knees. "Hey little girl. Come see your old Grandpa." He gives her a kiss. "And Teddy, my man. How's it going?" He pretends to spar with Teddy.

"I'm good Grandpa Ray. I didn't know you were comin' today." Teddy grins at his grandpa.

"Well, it was spur of the moment. I didn't really plan it. Your mom invited me after I saw her in town yesterday?"

"Where's Fred? Did you bring him?"

"No, I didn't bring Fred this trip. He is with a friend of mine who is dog sitting him for me."

"Oh. Did you see my dog?" Teddy picks JackO up and shows him off to Daddy. "His name is JackO, but I call him Jack. I saw him in the lake and Daddy swam out and saved him. He likes it here."

"Yes, Teddy I imagine he does like it here." Daddy pets Jack on the head." He's a mighty fine dog. Next time I'll bring Fred and they can play. But Fred's getting' awful big. He's a lot bigger than Jack."

"That's okay. Jack's tough. I think they could be friends."

"Yeah, Gampa Way. Jack's tough." Grace reiterates.

"Well, I'll go see what's for dinner. You all enjoy yourselves." Actually I just need a few minutes to absorb all of this. Mom getting remarried never seemed to bother me that much. She got remarried all the time. It was a full time job for her. But it's so different with Ray. He waited so long. It's like he takes it more seriously; like it has more significance for him. Fuck, I know this shouldn't upset me. Daddy deserves to be happy. I'm being selfish about the whole thing. I just need to accept it and get over it. Opening the fridge, I look around and check out the food situation. Maybe some chicken on the grill. The kids like chicken. Throw a few potatoes in the oven to bake and some sort of salad.

"Mom" I hear Teddy's little voice.

"Teddy," I gasp. "You scared me."

"I'm sorry."

"It's okay, baby. I was just thinking about dinner and didn't know you were there." I pull him over to me and give him a hug. "Goodness, you're all sweaty. You need a bath."

"I know. Can I have something to drink?"

"Sure you can. Juice? Water? What do you want?" I ask him.

"Juice I think. Orange," he requests.

"Okay." I pour him a glass and he climbs up on a stool at the breakfast counter to drink it.

"Mom, why was Grampa Ray with Myra yesterday?"

"Because he was eating lunch with her."

"Why?"

"Because they like each other and wanted to eat together."

"Why didn't she come with him today?"

"Because Grampa Ray wanted to talk to Daddy and me about something."

"About what?"

"Well. He just had some things he wanted to discuss with me? Do you want some barbeque chicken for dinner?"

"Yep. That sounds good. So is Myra Grampa Ray's girlfriend?" he asks draining his glass.

"Well, they are friends."

"Is Grampa Ray gonna' marry Myra?"

"Well, sweetheart. I think that's a possibility. Grampa really seems to care about Myra." I explain. "What do you think about that? Would that bother you?"

"I think that would be fine. I like Myra. I like Gail better, but she's already married to Taylor and he wouldn't like her to go out with Grandpa Ray."

"No, baby. I don't think Taylor would like that very much either." I have to smile at him as I wash up some potatoes to bake. "Would you like some Mac and Cheese instead of a potato?"

"Can I have both?" he asks.

"If you want to. I'll put a potato in for you."

"Okay. I'm goin' back outside now."

"Okay baby. Have fun."

After dinner we get the kids bathed and to bed and Daddy back on his way to Montesano and Fred. Christian starts the water in the tub for a bath as I brush out my hair.

"Are you okay Sweetheart?" I ask as I put my arms around my gorgeous husband and kiss his back.

"Yeah, I'm good, I guess. I'm just glad that business with Ray and Myra is over."

"Me too. It went better than I thought." I softly glide my finger down his back tracing his spine as I kiss his shoulders.

He shivers in my arms, "That tickles."

"Do you have a big week coming up?" I ask.

"Nothing out of the ordinary. Just the usual meetings." He says. "Oh, I think I have something on Saturday. I can't remember what is off hand. I hope I put it on my calendar. "

I move around to face him and give him a quick kiss. "You can be an asshole, ya' know." I smile up at him.

"I know," he grins, "But you love me anyway."

"But I love you anyway."

After we finish our bath and have dried off I slip into my gown and Christian is in his usual position on the bed, laptop on and in his lap, tapping away. He is pulling at his bottom lip with his thumb and index finger. He is in his pj bottoms and bare feet. As I crawl up on the bed and slide over next to him, he closes his lap top and puts his arm around me.

"Sweetheart, I need to ask you about something."

"Sure, what is it baby?" I ask.

"When we were in Sacramento, I got this weird email from Welch. Then when we went to the office yesterday I had a talk with him. After all these years it was all I could do to keep from firing him."

"My God, Christian. What happened? I can't imagine you even entertaining the thought of firing Welch."

"I know, but he missed something. Something very important."

"What? What did he miss?" I ask bewildered.

"Well, remember I told you that we track persons of interest and I'm alerted whenever there is movement I need to know about?"

Fuck! "Yes. I remember you telling me that."

"Well. Welch missed someone. Someone who was in Sacramento the same time you were."

"But you knew about Leila."

"Yes I knew about Leila," he says. "Before this goes any farther, is there something we need to talk about, Ana?"


	40. Chapter 40

_**Fifty Shades…Full Circle**_

_**Chapter 40**_

"Probably." I can't make eye contact with him right now. This isn't the way I wanted to do this.

"Well? What is it Ana? Please don't make me drag it out of you, Sweetheart." He is actually being sweet. Hopefully it's not just the calm before the storm, but I suspect otherwise. I'm so nervous I want to cry. My whole body is on edge. I guess just getting it out on the table is the best way to go. It's got to happen eventually.

"Well, I wanted to talk to you about this, but I wanted to wait until the right time."

"Looks like this is the right time," he says calmly.

"Christian," I start, sitting up and turning to face him. "I'm not sure where to start, so I'll just start at the beginning. Months ago, when I was still going to see Caroline, there was a note delivered to her store for me."

"Caroline's store?" he asks.

"Yes. I had them deliver it to the house and when I read it….I… well it was from someone who claimed to be your biological grandmother. Virginia Douglas. Now before you yell at me…"

"I'm not yelling at you," he says calmly.

"Okay. Well the note introduced her and asked if I would get in touch with her. Wait a minute." I get up and go to my dresser and pull the note out and hand it to Christian to read. "Here, you can read it." I give Christian time to read the note before I start again. "Christian, it all seems so awful now, but at the time…well….I just felt sorry for her…. and you and the kids."

"The kids?" he asks.

"Yes. If there is someone out there that can help us with any health information or anything that might affect you or our children I wanted to know about it. Like when you had that panic attack. They asked me about your family history and I couldn't give them any." My fingers are in knots I'm wringing my hands so furiously. I'm trembling and you can hear it in my voice. I'm sure he can see the terror in my eyes.

"Ana. Come here." He pulls me back into his arms. "Now calm down. Just tell me what happened." I'm really feeling better about this. He doesn't seem to be too upset…yet.

"Well, I took the information you told me about your family and pieced it together with the note and decided that maybe this was genuine. So I called her." I can feel Christian tense against me.

I try to slow my breathing and give him a chance to say something, but he doesn't. So I begin again. "When I spoke with her she seemed so genuine, but I was cautious. I promise, I didn't tell her anything. I knew there was a chance that it was just someone after money or a news story. That's why I didn't want to talk to her on the phone. I needed time to check her out and make sure she was who she said she was. So we decided to meet face to face. I figured doing it that way was safer. I knew I had security and they wouldn't let anything happen to me."

"Ana this note says that she had been trying to contact me and I refused to see her. Did that not mean anything to you? Wouldn't you have deduced that, given the opportunity, I would have met with her if I had wanted to?"

"Well, I thought of that, but I figured she hadn't been able to get to you. That she had been stopped by Andrea or one of your assistants. I thought that maybe if you could have talked to her you might have changed your mind."

"Ana. If I had any inclination to speak with her I wouldn't have told Andrea to deflect her efforts to contact me."

"No. I guess not."

"I explained to you in our conversation, when I told you about her, that I have no love lost there. She abandoned me and my mother. She left us to wallow in filth and starve. She left us at the mercy of that monster."

"Oh, sweetheart. That's not true." I sit up and look at him. "You just assumed that. All your information came from some private detective. You don't really know what happened."

"And you do? You believe what some stranger has told you?"

"Well. Maybe I should finish telling you what happened. Anyway, I couldn't figure out how to meet with her here in Seattle. I didn't want to have her to the house, because of security and the kids. I didn't want to take the chance of being seen with her if I met her in town. So I arranged to meet with her when I went to Sacramento. She flew in from Chicago while I was there. But Christian, I did my research. I looked up this woman on the internet and her information matched what you had told me. When I met with her, I made sure the face on the internet matched hers. I really was careful to make sure that she was who she said she was." By this time I'm sitting up on my knees facing him.

"So how did you get around security to meet with her?" he asks calmly.

"I called Sawyer and told him I was in for the evening. Then I went downstairs and met her in the hotel restaurant. I was careful not to meet her in private. I made sure it was a public place."

"Sawyer didn't know you left your room?" he has a scowl on his face.

"Well, I thought so. But when I went back to my room I saw him following me. He said it was unusual for me to let him know that I wasn't going out, so he…..he didn't believe me and followed me anyway."

"Well, that's something in his favor."

"Oh, Sweetheart, it wasn't Sawyer's fault. Please don't reprimand him." I beg him. I couldn't stand it if Sawyer took the fall for this.

"I'm not thinking of reprimanding him."

"Oh." I won't ask what he is actually thinking. "Anyway we had dinner and she turned out to be very nice. She told me the entire story about your mother. Did you know that she was adopted too?"

He just stares at me in silence.

"Virginia, told me about adopting her and raising her and what she was like. I learned the whole story about how she ended up in Detroit. Christian, your father isn't who you think it is."

"Oh, you're an expert on my past now?" he looks so stern and cold.

"No. I just think Virginia is a better source than a report from a private detective." I try to ease the way for the truth.

"Ana you don't know anything. You listened to a story from a stranger. If I had wanted to hear fairy tales, I would have met with her myself. I know the facts. You can't change facts." He gets off of the bed and paces as he runs his hand through his hair. "Look. I put all this behind me years ago. I have no fucking intention of pulling the scab off and trying make it heal again just because you think you know best. Why the fuck do you always feel the need to fix things? Some things just can't be fixed. It is what it is. Leave it alone."

"Sweetheart, you have carried this around since you were a small child. You have this misconception about where you came from and who you are and it has colored your entire life. I just wanted to give you a chance to feel better about yourself. To know who you really are."

"Ana, I fucking know who I am and I don't need you to tell me. What I need is for you to drop it. It's none of your business."

"Christian Grey, you are my husband and you are my business. If I can help you, then that's what I want to do."

He moves over to me and leans into my face, "Well maybe I don't want your fucking help. Maybe I don't need your fucking help. Maybe…"

"Maybe what?" I ask terrified.

"Ana, you are my wife. I trusted you more than anyone else in the world, even more than my own parents. If you betrayed me…what do I have left? If I can't trust you where are we? What do we have?"

"We have a marriage. We have two children. We have a life together."

"I'm not so fucking sure about that. Ana this is serious. I don't think you know just how serious this really is."

"What? What are you talking about?" I'm about to come apart at the seams.

"I'm saying that if you could go behind my back like this, then we have nothing."

"Christian, you don't mean that. You're angry. You'll calm down and think about it and realize that I did it for you; for us. I just wanted you to finally be free of this self-loathing that you carry around with you."

"Carry around with me?"

"Yes. You almost wear it like a badge of honor. ' Look at me. I'm the almighty Christian Grey, master of my world in spite of the fact that my mother was a crack whore and my father was God only knows who'. " I'm angry now. If we're going to do this we're going to do it. "You enjoy it Christian. You love that about yourself and you don't want to give it up. You don't want to know the truth." I get up and go back to my dresser and get the pictures of his parents. Walking back over to him it hold them out, but he doesn't look at them. "Here look at these. These are your parents Christian. Here is where you come from. This is who you are." Tossing the pictures at him, they fall on the floor at his feet. "I hate to have to burst your bubble, but your parents were very much in love. They were decent, smart, good kids who loved each other. Yes your mother was molested by her father, but he isn't _your_ father, Christian." Pointing to the pictures on the floor, "That's your father. And that's your mother. She was a sweet, kind, good girl, not a crack whore. Face it baby, you are the product of two people who not only loved each other, but wanted you very much. Sorry to disappoint you."

"That doesn't change the fact that the bitch left us to rot in that hell at the hands of that fucking bastard who abused me."

"That bitch, didn't know. That bitch spent years and thousands of dollars trying to find you. That bitch didn't find out about you until you had already been with Grace and Carrick for two years. That bitch wanted you, but loved you enough to know that you were better off with the Greys, so she let you stay there and watched over you the rest of your life."

"Christian, she is all alone. Ella was her only child and she is gone. She loves you. She knows she may not have a lot of time left and doesn't want to let the chance to know you slip away. Sweetheart, all she wants is the chance to meet you, to talk to you and explain everything."

"She's had 36 years to do that, and she hasn't. I have no fucking intention of doing it now."

"She has tried and you've cut her off at every turn. Aren't you listening to me?"

"Frankly I really don't want to hear anything you have to say. You betrayed me. You went behind my back. And you involved Sawyer. I'll have to take care of that issue."

"What are you going to do with Sawyer?" I ask.

"I can't afford to have people in my life who betray me. Consider him gone."

"Christian Grey don't you dare fire him," I growl at him.

"I employ him and I'll do as I fucking wish."

"Are you going to fire me too?" I defiantly ask.

" I haven't decided." He looks away from me. His body is stiff and I can see his jaw tense.

"What? What are you saying?" I can't believe what I've just heard.

"You heard me. I didn't get where I am today by allowing people into my life that I can't trust."

"And you don't trust me?" I ask.

"Should I? It seems obvious that you have it in you to betray me when you feel the need to. Of all the people in the world, I expected loyalty from you. Now I have no idea what you might do next."

"You hate me." I can't help the tears that are spilling out of my eyes and running down my cheeks.

"No, Anastasia. I love you. I'm just disappointed. Very disappointed. I expected better from my wife." He moves over and tenderly wipes the tears from my cheeks and looks into my eyes. "Please don't cry."

"Christian what do you expect? I've never seen you like this and it scares me."

"It's all about control, not emotion. When big decisions have to be made, it's better to step back and look at things without letting emotion cloud the issue."

"Who are you? I don't recognize you right now."

"It's who I've always been. I'm the same person. It's just time to step back and look at things. Don't you agree?"

"No. No I don't agree. Christian, you love me. That's emotion. You can't just throw that out the window. You can't just ignore that."

"I'm not ignoring it. I'm just eliminating it from the equation, Sweetheart. We need to think about this. Think about what all this means to us. Think about continuing this in light of the trust factor."

I'm in total shock. I can't believe what is happening. It's just not sinking in.

"You might want to step back and look at it too. Evidently you don't know me as well as you think you do. You might want to think about that."

"Yes I do. I know you better than you know yourself. I love you and I know you love me. I know you love your children and the life we have. I know you won't be able to survive without all of us." I'm almost hysterical and he is the picture of calm.

"I was surviving when I met you." He walks toward the door.

Taking a couple of steps toward him, "Christian. Where are you going?"

"I'm tired Anastasia. I'm going to bed." He stops momentarily.

"Not in here? Not with me?"

He shakes his head, "No. Not with you," then he continues out the door and down the hall.

I can't believe what has just taken place. I can't get my head around it. My sweet loving, yes even funny husband has just turned to stone before my eyes; controlled, calculating, cold stone. He didn't even see me. He looked right through me like he didn't know me. I'm almost disoriented. My world is askew. I want to run to him and hold him. I need him and he has turned his back on me. What have I done? Surely he'll get over it. He has to forgive me. Please, God he has to forgive me.

As I sink down I can still feel the warmth that lingers on his side of the bed. I can still smell his scent on the linens. He's just feet away, but he might as well be in another country. I can't have lost him. I know him. He loves me, but he also loves control. I know what he can do with his control. I've seen it. Sometimes it isn't very pretty, but his control always wins. His ability to see past the emotion and center on the facts. His ability to never give his hand away. His ability to control his adversary has made him what he is today.

But I know that isn't all there is to him. I know how he can love and feel and care. I know he loves me and I have to hang on to that right now. Surely after he gets a good night's sleep he'll see things in a different light. I need to cry, but right now I'm too scared to do anything but think. Try to think my way through this. If he had just yelled at me, fought with me, I could have dealt with it. I don't know how to fight this cold, distant creature masquerading as my husband.

* * *

I awaken still lying across the bed clinging to his pillow. I'm cold and reach for the blanket to pull over me, but I stop when I hear the faint music coming from down stairs. I strain to hear what he is playing. It's slow and sad. Getting up I walk to the bedroom door and down the hall. I follow the strains down the stairs and stop at the entrance to the front room where the baby grand resides. I can see him, in the dark, alone at the piano his eyes fixed a million miles away as he plays out his emotions. I actually feel a little better. At least if he is at the piano, he is feeling something. He is dealing with his feelings in one of the only ways he knows how. I remain motionless even though my inclination is to go to him, to comfort him and in turn comfort myself. As I make the slightest move, his eyes fix on me and he freezes. The music stops as he stares at me with those cold, steel gray eyes. After a moment he looks away and begins to play again. I realize that was my warning not to go near him.

As the tears come again, I turn and go back to our bedroom and fall back on the bed. Grabbing his pillow I sob into it, not wanting him to hear me in my anguish. What have I done?

* * *

As the sun breaks through our bedroom I open my eyes and for a brief moment all is right with the world. At least until I realize I am lying across the bed….alone. I throw the blanket off to get up. That's funny I don't remember covering myself up. Maybe Christian did it. Maybe he came in before he went back to bed. Looking up I can see the watery remains of a drink sitting on the side table next to a chair that is facing the bed. Yes, he must have come in. But he didn't wake me. He didn't touch me. He came in and left just as easily. Shrugging into my robe I walk out the door and down the hall. It's early still. Too early for him to have left for work. Besides he would have to come into our room to get his clothes. I would have heard him get dressed. Pushing open the door to the guestroom my heart sinks when I see the empty bed. Maybe he is downstairs eating. No it's still too early for Gail to be here. I pad down the stairs and see the kitchen light on. Walking to the kitchen I can smell the fresh coffee. The pot is on and is half full, but everything else is empty. Nothing else has been touched. Opening the garage door I see the SUV is gone. He must have left for work already. My heart sinks again as I close the door to the garage and put on some water for tea. The house is still quiet. The sun isn't up enough to bring color to the world yet. Everything is reflected in dull shades of gray.

"Goodness. What are you doing up so early?" Gail asks as I jump.

"Oh, good morning Gail. Did you sleep well?" I ask.

"A sight better than you, evidently," she returns.

"Is it that obvious?" I moan.

"Well, my first inkling was when Mr. Grey called Taylor at the crack of dawn and got him on his way."

"So they've gone to office?" I ask.

"I take it you didn't know?" she asks.

"No. All is not well in Grey Manor this morning, Gail."

"I see. Can I fix you a cup of tea?" she offers as a panacea.

"Yes. I was just going to fix one."

"It will pass, Ana. It always does. You know how Mr. Grey can be when you argue."

"This is different Gail. I think this is serious. It's as serious as when I got pregnant with Teddy."

"Ouch. Blip serious, huh?"

"Yes. Blip serious."

She hands me my steaming water and a tea bag as I climb on a stool at the breakfast bar. Burying my head in my hands, "Oh, Gail. I've really fucked up this time."

"It can't be that bad, Ana. You know Mr. Grey loves you more than anything."

"Yes I know that. Unfortunately he seems to be able to put feelings on the back burner and let reason and control rule the situation."

"Oh. I see. Well, I'm here if you need me. I don't want to pry, but I'll be glad to listen." She says.

I think she understands the gravity of the situation. She knows him well.

I jump when the phone rings. "Grey residence…..May I say who's calling?...One moment please." Gail answers and hands me the phone. "Someone named Barney for you."

"Oh. Okay. Thanks." Taking the phone. "Hello, this is Mrs. Grey."

"Yes ma'am. Uh, Mr. Grey wanted me to come out and get you wired in. Will you be home today?"

"Well yes, I think so, Barney. But I hate for you to have to come all this way. Don't you have someone less…. necessary that can do it?"

"Well, yes ma'am, I do But Mr. Grey was insistent that I do it personally. Want's it done right the first time, I guess." he chuckles. "So what time is good for you, Mrs. G."

"Oh, anytime I guess. I should be here all day."

"Okay, I'll leave in a few and see you then."

"Okay Barney. Thank you."

Handing the phone back to Gail, "That was Christian's head of IT. He'll be out in a while to get my equipment set up for me in my office. Can you buzz him through? His name is Barney."

"Sure Ana. I'll be looking out for him." She pours herself a cup of coffee, "So, do you want to talk about it?"

"I'd love to, but I think I've betrayed him enough for one day." I take a sip of tea, "Oh my God Gail. He's going to fire Sawyer. I can't let him do that. How do I stop him?"

"Fire Sawyer?" she asks in amazement. "Good heavens what in the world has happened?"

"Gail I met with someone from his past without telling him. I betrayed him. Gail I think he may leave me."

"Leave you? Never. He wouldn't do that. What makes you say that?"

"Last night while we were talking, he didn't act angry. He didn't argue or fight. He just turned to stone. He was able to tell me that he loved me but that love didn't enter into his decision. He said he couldn't have any one in his life that he couldn't trust."

"Oh, I see. That is serious. I haven't seen him like that in years. But, Ana, I just can't see him actually leaving you, sweetheart. He adores you. You and the children are his life. He couldn't survive without all of you."

"Well he seems to think that he can. And it scares the hell out of me."


	41. Chapter 41

_**Fifty Shades…Full Circle**_

_**Chapter 41 **_

**A/N: I had no idea that the last chapter would affect everyone so much. Thank you for all the comments and reviews. I read each and every one. We all seem to be very invested in this family. **

* * *

Finishing up my tea, I head for the bedroom to get dressed and have to stop. "Oh Gail. Just to make your day complete, I need to talk to you about Myra."

"Myra? Is something wrong? Is she ill?"

"No, but you may be. It seems she has become romantically involved with…with my father."

"Really? With Mr. Steele?" Disbelief is written all over her face.

"Yes. We saw them in town having lunch on Saturday. Daddy came out yesterday and we talked about the situation. It seems he is quite taken with our Myra. So taken that he asked her to marry him."

"What did she say?" she takes another sip of her coffee.

"Well she said yes. You're awfully calm about it."

"It doesn't surprise me," Gail tells me.

"You knew about it?" I ask in surprise.

"Oh heavens no. It's just that Mr. Steel can be quite the charmer and I know Myra was lonely. She's a woman in her late forties, never been married and love doesn't come around very often when a woman hits that age."

"So, do you think she really cares for him?" I ask her advice.

"I would think so, Ana. I've never discussed it with Myra, but she's a very nice woman. I like her and I'm sure Mr. Steele was probably taken with her as well. I can't imagine her taking advantage of him. She just doesn't seem the type."

"That's good to hear. I'm not sure how to handle the work situation."

"Well as far as I'm concerned until she gets married or quits, everything is just as it was. I have no problem working with her, that is if she wants to stay."

"Do you think she will? Want to stay?" I ask her.

"I imagine so. Myra needs a job and she likes it here. I can't see her leaving without somewhere to go."

"Okay. So you think she'll be in today?"

"Well, she hasn't called me so; I can't see why she wouldn't be in today. Don't worry Ana. I'll talk to her. You have enough on your plate right now."

"Thank you. I don't know what I'd ever do without you Mrs. Taylor."

She gives me a big smile, "You just take care of Mr. Grey. He may be angry, but he needs you right now. If he has retreated to control mode…he's in pain. Take care of him."

"I'm trying Gail. I'm really trying." I head to go back upstairs again and get dressed. Barney will be here any time and I need to be available to show him where to set everything up. Getting into my jeans and a white cotton blouse, I pull my hair up into a ponytail. I really need to get some of this cut off. It's getting so long that it's getting hard to handle. Maybe something shorter like shoulder length. God, now is not the time to cut my hair off, not with Christian so angry.

Leaning forward and looking in the mirror I scrutinize my face. I'll be thirty this year. I look awful. The morning after a night of crying is not a good look. My eyes are red and puffy and my face is swollen. Plastering on some blush and lip gloss I call it done. I need to get the kids awake and down for breakfast. Then I have a stack of manuscripts that I need to start on.

Walking into Teddy's room I start to wake him, but he looks so sweet sound asleep like that. It is his summer vacation and I probably should just let him sleep. He looks so much like Christian. Pulling the cover up on him I bend down and kiss his curls and let him sleep. Checking on Grace, I do the same. My sweet little girl. My sweet, hard –headed, willful, brutally honest little girl. God help the boy that likes her. Beauty and attitude aren't always a good combination. Christian and I will have our hands full with her. But I wouldn't trade her for anything.

Walking back down stairs I enter my new office. Everyone did such a spectacular job. Elliott and Gia and especially Liz. She's so damn good. She always gets what I like and turns it into something beautiful. This office feels like mine. I finally feel like I have my own sanctuary in this house. My manuscripts are piled on my desk and I can't wait to start on them. God I hope they're good. Nothing worse than having to read a really bad book. And believe, me they are out there. Everyone thinks they're a writer now days. I hope Connie is good at sorting out the dogs from the diamonds before they get to me.

"Mrs. Grey," I jump and turn to see Gail. "That Barney fellow is here."

"Oh, gosh. Thanks. Send him on in here."

"Hey there, Mrs. G." I see the mop head of Barney poking around the corner. He's in his baggy baby cords and button down, wrinkled, oxford cloth shirt. That's business casual for him. He is definitely a holdover from the 70s. It's summer for heaven sake, but that's Barney. He lives in an alternate universe from the rest of us, but I adore him. Christian does too. He and Christian can get into tech discussions that last for hours. It's way over my head.

"Hey, Barney. How's it going?"

"Fair to middlin', Mrs. G."

"Good. How was Mr. Grey this morning?" I ask against my better judgment.

"You'd know better than I would. I mean you sleep with…. 'em. Uh.. I mean you saw him this morning. Shit, I always stick my foot in it. I mean heck. He's not in such a good mood this morning, Mrs. G."

I have to giggle," That's okay Barney. I know what you mean. He just left really early before I got up."

"Oh, well like I said, he must have somethin' big on his mind. He's got his personal space extended and you don't want to set foot in it this morning."

"I see. Well, I'm sorry he made you come out here to do such a menial task. All I need is my computer and printer and phones and all that stuff set up and connected."

"Oh that's okay. It gets me out of the office for a while. Don't worry I'll have you at the center of the universe before you know it."

"What? Center of the universe?"

"Yeah, you know when you're at your computer on the internet and you can go anywhere, see anything, talk to anyone in the world. It's like the universe is all around you. You can just reach out and touch whatever you want to." He's grinning from ear to ear. "It's fuckin' great, man….I mean it's great, ma'am."

"That's okay Barney. I understand."

"Okay, Mrs. G. I'll get all this unpacked and you can show me where you want it before I get it all hooked up."

"Great, Barney. Would you like something? Coffee? A cold drink? Juice?"

"Man a cup of coffee would be over the top. Thanks."

"Okay. I'll be back in a minute." I have to smile and chuckle. I really like Barney. I've never seen him in a bad mood. Good chemicals I suspect. Christian is really strict about having everyone tested on a regular basis. But I suspect Barney gets a free pass. Christian really likes him and couldn't do without him.

Taking him his coffee, I stop to watch him for a moment as he opens the boxes and removes the equipment. Looking down into an open box he removes my new laptop. "Hey there little dude. Come on out here and see the world." He examins it, "Sweeet. They treated you right Mrs. G. This is prime."

"So does everything look good?" I ask.

"Oh, wow. Yes Mrs. G. This is prime goods. Everything here is just hatched. Right off the showroom floor. You'll be doing that happy dance when I get you all wired in."

"Well that's good to hear. Here is your coffee. Can I get you anything else?"

"Whoah. Who's this?" he asks as Jack wanders in to see what is going on.

"Oh, that's Jack. He's a new addition to the family." I tell him as he picks Jack up and pets him.

"Hey there little Jack. This is a fine dog Mrs. G." he grins at me.

"Thank you. We're fond of him. Everything looks good where it is. I'll leave you to get it all set up. Just give me a yell if you need anything."

"Will do. It shouldn't take too long. I'll have you going in no time."

Leaving Barney to his task, I really feel a need to talk to Christian. I pull out my phone and dial his. "Grey. Leave a message," is all I get. I can't remember ever getting his voice mail. Maybe he's really busy or maybe he just doesn't want to talk to me. I debate whether to leave a message, but decide to. "Good morning sweetheart. I missed you this morning. I just wanted to let you know that Barney is here taking care of everything. Thank you for sending him over. I'll let you get back to work. I love you Christian. I love you."

It was good to hear his voice even if all he said was 'Grey, leave a message.' Christian definitely has an economy of words. I need to talk to Taylor. Finding his name I push the button. It rings three times and I think it is going to go to voice mail, but instead, "Yes, Mrs. Grey. Taylor here. What can I do for you?"

"Taylor do you have a moment to talk to me?" I ask.

"Yes, ma'am. A moment. Mr. Grey is in a meeting so I'm back in my office."

"Great. Look without going into any detail, Mr. Grey is very angry this morning…"

"Yes ma'am. That would be correct."

"Jason, he is angry at me and I think he may try to take it out on Sawyer. I think he may fire him because of something I may have done."

"Mr. Grey is meeting with Luke right now ma'am."

"Okay. If he fires Luke, I want you to hire him back."

"What? Mrs. Grey I can't do that. Mr. Grey decides who works for him not me."

"I know. But Luke can work for me. I'll take care of him."

"But Mr. Grey won't want to see him around any of the family if he has fired him."

"I understand that. Just tell Luke to take a few days off and I'll pay him his regular salary and benefits until I can get this worked out with Mr. Grey. Tell him not to worry. He did something for me and I told him I'd take care of him. Do you understand what I'm saying?"

"Yes, ma'am. I'll make sure Luke understands, but we're skating on thin ice here; very thin ice."

"I know and I wouldn't ask you to do it but I need a little time to get things worked out."

"I understand, Mrs. Grey."

"Jason. How is Mr. Grey this morning?

"Well. I guess he's fine. He seems a little edgy. Everyone is definitely giving him a wide berth."

"Okay. Thank you Jason and keep this between you and me, okay?"

"Yes, Mrs. Grey. Just between you and me."

"Thank you."

"No problem, Mrs. Grey."

Gail has the kids up and dressed and fed. Grace seems to be watching cartoons and Teddy is helping Barney get my office set up.

"Teddy, come on and leave Barney alone. I'm sure he doesn't need any help."

"Oh, he's cool Mrs. G. Little dude here is a big help. We're discussing the fine difference between snub nose and needle nose pliers."

"Okay. I'm sure that will come in handy later in life. Just pitch him out if he gets in your way."

"Oh, we're good." Barney grins at me and ruffles Teddy's hair.

"Teddy. Don't get in his way and don't pester him, okay?"

"I won't mom." He smiles up at me. Actually Barney and Teddy could probably be good buddies. Emotionally they are about the same age.

Grabbing a manuscript off of the top of the pile, I walk to the kitchen to get a fresh cup of tea. I pass Gail on my way to the staircase. "Gail, since my office is in a state if chaos, I'm going up to our room to start work on this manuscript. If you need me I'll be up there."

"Sure thing Ana. I'll keep an eye on things down here."

I plant myself on the sofa in our sitting area and pulling my feet under me, I fold back the cover to the book. _Please don't let this bark too loudly_, I say to myself as I begin to read.

Before I know it I'm over a hundred pages into the story. I'm pulled out of my book world, by a commotion downstairs. Good heavens what is that. Looking at my watch I can see that it is after one o'clock. I get off the sofa and walk to the door to go see what is going on. As I pull the door open, I bump into Christian, "Oh, you scared me. I...I didn't expect you home this early." I back up to let him in and bury my hands in my pockets.

"I didn't expect to _be_ home this early," he replies.

"Christian, you left without saying goodbye this morning."

"Yes I know. I have a lot going on. I have to earn a living to take care of this family." He walks to his closet and takes out his suitcase and garment bag and throws them on the bed. Opening them he begins to gather clothes and fill them.

"I hardly think that taking time to kiss me goodbye will put us in the poor house."

"Okay. Let's just say, I wasn't inclined to kiss you this morning."

"Well that was honest."

"I like honesty Ana. I admire that in a person, don't you?"

"Are you going somewhere?" I ask.

"That should be obvious," he says continuing to fill his luggage.

"Where are you going?"

"I have business in Pittsburg. I told you I might have to go several weeks ago." He continues traveling back and forth between his dresser, his closet and his luggage.

"I remember. I also remember that you asked me to go with you."

"Under the circumstances, I don't think that's a very good idea."

"You don't want me to go?" I ask.

"You are welcome to go anywhere you choose, Ana. I just don't think traveling with me right now is good for either one of us." He advises as he continues to gather and fold his belongings.

"Christian, you aren't leaving just because you are mad at me are you?" I ask.

"I'm not mad at you, Ana. I'm disappointed. There's a difference. And I don't make business trips because of emotion. It's business. I have to take care of some things personally and I'm needed there. Don't flatter yourself to think that your actions would drive me out of my own house."

I can feel the tears spilling over the rims of my eyes. "Christian. I didn't mean to hurt you. You know that's the last thing in this world I'd ever do. Please forgive me. I was wrong. I know that. I shouldn't have gone behind your back. I have no excuse. I just love you so much and I can't bear to think of being without you."

I can see his jaw tense as I grovel before him. "Ana. Please stop it. We need to be apart right now. This trip came at a good time. I need time to decide if I can ever trust you again."

"Christian, of course you can trust me. I love you. I would never hurt you."

"You didn't think twice when you met with Virginia behind my back. You didn't seem to care how I would feel about it. You had total disregard for my feelings. Why wouldn't I think that you would do it again, if you wanted to?"

"Because," I move over between him and the suitcase on the bed," I love you. You are my life, my heart, my reason for living. I know you are in pain right now and so am I."

"I'm not in pain. Control Ana. I've always tried to teach you control. Separate your emotions from the situation." He puts his hands on my shoulders and moves me aside to resume packing.

"Well, I can't do that. I suppose that's why I prefer books to business. Books make you feel something."

"A good bottom line makes me feel something." He glares over at me.

"Are you taking Taylor with you?"

"Yes. I always take Taylor with me," he says.

"Will Luke be with us?" I ask.

"No. Luke Sawyer is no longer with us. I'll have them send Reynolds over."

"Oh, Christian. How could you?" I'm getting angry now. "You're beating up on Jason for something I did. That's not fair."

"Life isn't fair. He didn't report that you had met with anyone. That is in strict violation of protocol."

"He didn't report it because I asked him not to. Christian I thought these people were security not spies. I can't live being spied on."

"I need to know what is going on in order to keep you safe."

"I understand that, but I wasn't in any danger and Sawyer was with me. I told him what to do. You can't blame him for that."

"I can and I do."

"Then do I need to start having Taylor report your every move to me as well?" I ask. "Maybe I need to know every time you enter the men's room."

"I have nothing to hide from you."

"Christian I won't be spied on. I have gotten used to having security, but I won't have every move I make written up in a report."

"You will if you live here. Suite yourself."

"Go to fucking Pittsburg or Philadelphia or Cincinnati or where ever it is you need to go." I throw my hands up. "I'll talk to you when you get back." I storm out of the bedroom and leave him to pack. Things didn't go as well as I had hoped. I think I may have just made it worse.

I rush to a bathroom down the hall and try to repair my face. The cold water really isn't helping much. Now I just look wet and puffy. I head down stairs to see about the kids. Taylor is talking to Barney about the equipment he has just installed. I'm sure he's asking how to install spying devices on the computer. Heaven forbid I should make a move or have a thought that they aren't fully aware of. I see Jason's bag sitting next to the door ready to go. Turning to look at the staircase, I hear Christian coming down duffel in hand and garment bag over his shoulder.

"Dada, where you goin'?" Grace asks with a frown on her face.

"Daddy has to make a quick business trip, sweetheart." Christian sets his bags down and picks Grace up and gives her a big hug and a kiss. "I won't be gone long."

"Dad. Can I go with you?" Teddy asks.

"Not this time son. Maybe another time. I need you to stay here and take care of things for me," he gives Teddy's curly head a rub. "Can you be the man of the house for a few days?"

"Sure. But you promise I can go with you sometime?" Teddy pouts.

"Yes. I promise. One day we'll take a trip just us guys. Okay?" He smiles down at his son who is still pouting.

"And JackO, don't let any strangers on the property. You may be small, but you're fierce. Remember that," he grins down at the fuzz ball.

Christian kisses his children and Taylor kisses Gail as they pick up their bags to leave. Taylor walks out followed by Christian, but Teddy stops him as he stands on the front porch. "Dad! Wait Dad."

"What is it son?"

"You forgot to kiss Mom goodbye. You always kiss her good bye when you leave."

It's all I can do to keep from bursting out into sobs. He's never left without kissing me good bye.

"I guess I did." He walks back to me and gives me a soft, quick kiss, "Goodbye Ana."

"Goodbye Christian. Be safe. Please." I whisper to him. He and Taylor get into the SUV and disappear down the drive.

"Well. Looks like we are on our own for a few days kids. Maybe we can think of some fun things to do while Dad's away."

"I'm sorry Gail. I know you hate it when Taylor is gone."

"Oh, I get used to it. It's his job. Doesn't mean I have to like it."

"Um, Mrs. G. I'm finished getting this all hooked up. Do you want me to go over any of it with you?' Barney asks. I had almost forgotten he was here.

"Well I guess it wouldn't hurt." He shows me all of the equipment and it is pretty straightforward. "What's that box?" I ask pointing to a small box with connections to the cable and the computer.

"Oh, That's a secure connection straight to SAP. It makes it just like you were sitting in their office using the equipment. I guess they don't want to take a chance that Mr. Grey might try to steal trade secrets or anything." He chuckles. "Oh, not that Mr. Grey would do that. I just mean it gives you a secure connection to their network. No offense. I mean Mr. Grey would never steal….. anything."

"It's okay Barney. I know what you mean." I try to give him a smile.

"Well, I guess I'll be getting' on back. Things have probably quieted a bit now. You know with Mr. Grey gone for a few days and all. Oh, not that he …."

"It's okay Barney." I try to reassure him, "I'm well acquainted with Mr. Grey's management style. I understand. Go back and enjoy the peace and quiet for the next few days."

"Yes, Mrs. G. Thanks. Just give me a call if you have any problems or questions."

"I will. And thanks again for coming out." I show him the door and release him back into the wild.

I don't know how I will get through the next couple of days. How does he separate himself from everything? How can you love someone and just turn it off to make your life more convenient? I'm fooling myself. Christian is hurting just as much as I am. He has retreated behind his wall. He calls it control, but it's just his way of handling pain. Gail's right. He is in as much pain I am.

I need to find Myra. I know she's here because my bed was made this morning. Walking down the hall, I finally locate her in Grace's room straightening up. Trying not to startle her, "Uh, Myra?"

"What? Yes? Oh, Mrs. Grey. You scared me. My mind was somewhere else," she smiles at me holding a stuffed toy in each hand.

"I'm sorry I didn't mean to scare you. Can you come talk to me for a minute, please?"

"Sure." She says as she puts the toys in Grace's toy box and follows me to my sitting room in our bedroom.

"Please Myra, have a seat." I motion to the sofa as I take a seat in the club chair across from her. "Myra, I'm sure you know that Daddy came out to the house Sunday evening."

"Yes ma'am. He told me," she says looking a bit ill at ease.

"I know this is very awkward for all of us. Except Daddy. Nothing seems to bother him sometimes." I smirk. "He told us about your plans. Myra, I want you to know that I love Daddy very much and I want him to be happy. If he is happy in this relationship then I'm all for it. He's been alone for a long time and he deserves to have someone in his life that makes him happy."

"Mrs. Grey, he makes me happy too. I really do care for Ray. I care for him very much."

"That's good to know. I hope it works out for both of you." I stammer a bit. "I just want to find out what you want to do. Are you comfortable continuing to work here?"

"Oh, yes ma'am. I love it here. Gail and I get along so well and you and Mr. Grey are so nice. I can't afford to be without a job. I mean after Ray and I get married, I'll have to leave. That would really be awkward." She laughs and I laugh with her.

"Yes. I can't see that working out."

"But I'm fine with it as long as you and Mr. Grey are comfortable having me here."

"Well, I will say it is a bit unusual, but I think it will be okay. You do realize that as long as you are here your NDA will be in effect, even with my father."

"Yes. I understand. I wouldn't repeat anything I've seen or heard anyway, just on principal."

"Okay. Well then. Have you and Daddy set a date?"

"No, not really. He just proposed this past weekend." She holds out her hand to show me the tiny diamond ring.

"Oh, Myra that's lovely." I can tell she is so proud of it. I'm almost embarrassed about the near ten carats sitting on my finger.

"I told him not to get me one. I mean he's retired and all. I didn't need it. But he said since I'd never been married that he wanted me to have it."

"That's my dad. He really is such a good man." I remind her.

"Yes. I think so," she agrees.

"Well, Mr. Grey, Christian offered to have the wedding here and we'd love to give it to you as a gift. Talk about it and let us know."

"I will and thank you."

I stand and give her a big hug. Yes this will be awkward until they are married. Trying to balance employee and my father's fiancée will be tricky.

"Oh, Myra did you see any photos on the floor when you vacuumed this morning?"

"No. I didn't."

"Okay. I had dropped some last night and forgot about picking them up. Thank you."

After taking the time to rummage through Christian's drawers, I can't find the pictures or the note Virginia sent me. Christian must have them, but where are they? It would be just like him to have torn them to shreds. I really hope he hasn't. I'd like to have them to give the kids one day.

**A/N: Next chapter Ana seeks out John's advice and guidance. **


	42. Chapter 42

_**Fifty Shades…Full Circle**_

_**Chapter 42**_

I want to make sure Christian arrived in Pittsburg in one piece. I'll text him right quick. Maybe that will spur him to call me.

Christian. Have you arrived in Pittsburg?

A.

* * *

It doesn't take too long to hear back.

* * *

Yes. On the ground in Pittsburg.

C.

* * *

Good. I feel better knowing you arrived safely.

A.

* * *

There was no reason to worry.

C.

* * *

I always worry. I love you.

A.

* * *

Good night, Anastasia.

C.

* * *

Good night, Christian. I miss you.

A.

* * *

Christian

* * *

Well. That was touching. After getting my kids bathed and to bed I hit the tub to relax a bit. What a day. Fighting with Christian wasn't enough I had Barney and Myra to deal with. I did enjoy being able to get away and do some reading. Sliding down in to the warm foamy water I lie back and relax. That book wasn't too bad. It was rough around the edges, but it had a good story. Probably it could be tightened up a bit and polished. Nothing a good editor can't help with. That's me. Anastasia Rose Steele Grey, editor. Finally! It feels so different than when I worked for Grey Publishing. I feel separated from the almighty Grey conglomerate. On my own. Independent. I don't have to feel like the boss's wife all the time. I'm just plain Anastasia Grey. Nothing special. Just one of the group. I haven't felt this way since I married Christian. It feels so good to be anonymous.

It gets so old always being watched. Never having any privacy, even in my private life. If I didn't love Christian so damn much, I'd never have wanted this lifestyle. It was never who I am. I just wanted to be me without all the ball gowns and jewelry and charity events. I would just as soon have a Honda as that R8 out in the drive. But then I wouldn't have Christian. That would never do. Christian is the one part of the Grey conglomerate that I can't live without. I can't imagine what my life would be without him. I don't want to even think about it.

I do need to think about this wedding for Myra and Daddy. If we are going to have it here, they need to decide so I can get on with it. I've never planned a wedding. Grace and Mia did all the work when I married Christian. Well, it will be good practice for when Grace gets married. Actually what I need to do is get bathed and out of the tub before I fall asleep. I got no sleep last night and I am exhausted.

Since Christian isn't here I can just sleep in an old soft night shirt and panties. I look forward to that. I only sleep in the silk gowns because he likes them. Come to think of it, most of everything I do is because Christian likes it. It doesn't bother me really. I love him and I want to make him happy. I like making him happy. I miss him so much. After turning out the lights and sliding into bed I snuggle down. Then hearing Jack whine I look over to see him sitting by the bed.

"What's the matter boy? Do you miss him too?" I give him a nod. "Come on. Get up here with me." He can't make it so I reach down and pull him up on the bed and he nestles in next to me. It's almost soothing to just stroke his head and his ears. He's such a sweet little guy. Never having had one I guess he's a good dog. He seems to be a good boy. I know Teddy and Christian adore him. Who knew Christian would fall for a dog.

"Mom?" I hear a tiny whisper and turn to see the bedroom door cracked.

"Yes sweetheart?"

"Mom? Since Dad isn't here, can I sleep with you?" I hear Teddy's little voice.

"Of course, baby. Come on in." He runs in and jumps up on the bed and crawls under the covers next to me displacing poor Jack.

"I like it when Dad is gone sometimes," he says. "I mean I miss him and all, but I like it when I can sleep with you."

"Don't tell Daddy, but I sort of like it too," I whisper. "Come here, baby." I pull him up in my arms and rub my nose in his hair kissing his head.

Just getting settled back in and relaxed, I jump when I feel someone poke me, "Mama?...Mama I seep wif you too?"

Looking over seeing Grace, standing there in her little night gown holding her rabbit. "Sure. Come on up here." I help pull her onto the bed and she snuggles in on the other side of me. Well there goes any hope of spreading out in the bed by myself. Two kids and a dog. All I'm missing is my husband. Something tells me in spite of everything, he'd rather be right here in this bed with us than in a Pittsburg hotel.

When I wake I gently ease out of bed trying not to wake the kids and dog. Darn, can't get anything past the dog. Jack and I tiptoe downstairs and I feed him breakfast as I make a cup of tea. I'm not sure what to do or how to handle things. Maybe John would have time to see me. Perhaps he can give me some insight into this sudden change in Christian. I just don't know how to deal with this void of emotion that he has.

Let me see if I can get in.

"Good morning Mrs. Grey. How can I help you?" I hear his receptionist say.

"Hi Phyllis. I know this is short notice, but does Dr. Flynn have any time open at all this week?"

"Well I just had a patient reschedule a few minutes ago. Could you be here around 2?"

"Yes. Yes I can be there. Thank you so much. I really appreciate it."

"No problem Mrs. Grey. We'll be looking for you at 2."

"Thank you." I'm glad I called. I could really use some support in this situation.

Arriving at John's office I only have to wait a few minutes before I'm called back. He is always so prompt. I think that is one reason why Christian keeps coming to see him. Christian doesn't do waiting very well. That and whether he admits it or not, he really likes John.

"Ana. How lovely to see you. Please come in." He motions me to sit allowing me to choose the place, as usual. I choose my old spot on the sofa next to the tissue box.

"Thank you John. It's good to see you as well. How are Rhian and the kids?'

"They are well. The kids are enjoying summer vacation and driving Rhian crazy, but all in all everything is good. How are you and the children?"

"About the same as Rhian. The kids are good. Oh, we have a dog now."

"A dog? Wonderful little creatures. I highly recommend them. Just how did that come about?"

"Teddy spotted him swimming out in the lake and Christian swam out and rescued him. He is supposed to be the kid's dog, but I think he and Christian have bonded."

"That wouldn't surprise me. It's that unconditional love. Dogs, don't ask for much. To be fed, given a warm place to sleep and to win our approval. In return they adore us. They don't really care if you are a CEO of a multi-billion dollar company or a scullery maid." Sitting in his usual wing back, with his note pad, I can feel him searching my face for clues as to why I'm here. "And you? What changes since we last talked?"

"Well I have started a job."

"Wonderful. Seems I remember that you were wanting to do that last year. Is this something you are happy about?"

"Yes. So far I love it. It's not with Grey publishing, though. It's actually a competitor. It makes me feel free and independent."

"I see. Well. How is Christian with that?"

"He seems to be okay with it. I was surprised to say the least. But he said as long as that is what I wanted to do he was okay with it."

"Well, that was certainly generous of him. Allowing you to what you want to do."

I can't help but snicker. "Yes. It was. Actually it was a big deal for him."

"I imagine it was, knowing him as I do. "

"You haven't asked about Christian."

"No. I suppose I haven't. How is he?"

"Well that's why I'm here."

"I suspected as much. What seems to be going on?"

"Oh, John it's a long story."

"Well we have an hour. Let's plow through it, shall we?"

"I think I have really made a mistake with Christian."

"How so?"

"Several months ago I was contacted by someone who claimed to be his biological grandmother. She wanted me to contact her. Seems she had been trying to get in touch with Christian and he wouldn't speak to her. After considering it, I called her."

"Even though you had it on good authority that Christian did not wish to have contact with her, you proceeded in contacting her."

"Yes."

"Hmmm. Okay. How did you know that this woman was who she said she was?"

"Well, Christian had told me about her, so I knew she was probably who she said she was. I did a bit of internet research and everything seemed to match up, so just called her one day."

"Why did you feel the need to go against Christian's wishes and contact this woman who may or may not have been his grandmother?"

"Well. I have children and I thought it would be advisable to get any kind of medical history for them , if I could. I mean what if, God forbid, they needed a transplant one day ,or had a family history of some disease that we need to know about?"

"You had her information, you didn't feel that you could wait and contact her if it became necessary in the future?"

"John. It's his grandmother. She won't be around forever and my children are very young. She might have passed away by the time we needed the information. I did it for Christian as well. I mean when he had that panic attack a couple of weeks ago, the hospital wanted a medical history including his family and I couldn't provide it. We had no idea what it was."

"I see. And you do now?"

"Well no. Not exactly."

"I see. Let's continue. What happened when you contacted this woman?"

"Well. I knew I couldn't be sure of who she was and I didn't want to really engage her over the phone, so I agreed to meet with her when I traveled to Sacramento recently for my job." There is a long silence and that is my cue to continue. "Anyway, as I said before, I did my research and verified the information that she gave me with what Christian had told me and determined what she looked like. When I met with her she matched the picture that I had found of her. John it was such a good meeting. I found out so many things that Christian had gotten wrong about his mother and how he ended up the way he did."

"So you have information that would change his concept of himself? Who he is and how he began?"

"Yes. It's not what he thinks it was. His mother loved him and wanted him. His father loved his mother and wanted them both. They were good people, not a crack whore and her father."

"Ana. Think for a moment. Christian has had this concept of who he is and where he came from pretty much all of his life. Even if it isn't very pleasant, it is what he has known about himself. Now you have informed him that he is not who he thinks himself to be. How would you feel in that situation? How would you feel if Christian suddenly informed you that your parents aren't really your parents and you come from far different circumstances than you had thought all of your life?"

"I guess it would be pretty unnerving. I was so happy to be able to let him know that his parents were good kids who loved each other and loved him that I didn't think about that."

"Right. Well there is that issue and then there is the issue that Christian had made it clear that he did not want to have contact with this woman, yet you proceeded to disregard his wishes. Do you think perhaps he feels betrayed by you as well as trying to deal with the change in his concept of his past? That's a lot to handle all at once."

"Yes. I guess you are right. It's just that he seems to almost like that sordid story. He wears his past and uses it to make excuses for a lot of his behaviors. _Poor Christian Grey, crack whore mother and product of incest. Look how far he has come in spite of that. Look what he has made of himself in spite of his appalling start in life. _He just can't get past it."

"Yes he does carry that yolk fairly proudly. It is a crutch for him."

"John, I just wanted for him to have a better self- image and I wanted my kids to know that story about him rather that the crack whore story."

"I can understand that. You have a need to fix things, to make them better. I think we are still dealing with co-dependent issues aren't we?"

"Yes. I suppose." I watch my hands as I twist them in my lap. "I just don't know how to stop it. I love my husband and I love my children. Why wouldn't I want things to be better for them?"

"Any normal person would, Ana. We want the best for those we love. We want to keep our loved ones close and save them from pain. But Christian has to deal with his own pain. You can't do it for him. Remember? You can't carry his pain."

"Well, that's one reason I'm here. After we talked about the meeting and I told him about his parents…and I even showed him pictures of his parents…He …well I thought he would be furious."

"And he wasn't?"

"Well he didn't show it. He just became distant and cold. He could say that he loved me , yet he also said that I had betrayed him and that he needed to make decisions about us without love being in the equation. How can he do that? How can you just decide to not feel something that you feel?"

"Ahh. I see. It's an old coping mechanism of his left over from his childhood. Not a very good one, but one he feels comfortable with just the same. You see, Christian has been in so many intolerable situations, the neglect and physical abuse when he was very young, feeling alienated in school, then the abuse from Elena et al. When he can't deal with something he retreats. He cuts off his feelings and sets them aside. Takes them out of the equation as you said. He only sees the facts of a situation and makes his decisions using those facts. I think that ability is what has made him a very astute business man.

"In fact there is some new book out recently by , by, let me think, who is it….It won't come to me right now. Something about killer emotions, kill your emotions, something like that. Oh yes, it's by Ken Lindner. That's right. I haven't read it as yet, but the theory is, I believe, that emotions inhibit your ability to make good decisions. That feelings can overpower intellect and good judgment. You respond to the emotions rather than the facts of the situation. He professes that if you make decisions based on emotion, that your decisions are not a well thought-out reflection of your best judgment. That if you make emotionally charged decisions, they can be self-defeating, and in direct contradiction to what you, in a more lucid moment, would want to accomplish. Then later, upon clearer reflection, you realize that you had compromised your life goals and dreams, as well as your physical, psychological, emotional, and/or spiritual well-being.

"In addition, and this may be the biggest negative for Christian, is that this failure to do what you generally know is "right" may lead to a significant lessening of your overall self-esteem, as well as a substantial decrease in your confidence to create and enjoy the life that you want to have.

"Now I do agree that there are some things in life that you can control and things that you can't. People tend to make bad choices at times, because they worry about things that they can't control, instead of focusing on controlling the things that they can."

"Okay. That was a lot to take in." My head is swimming after that.

"Basically he is just saying that you can control your reasoning and evaluative processes, by removing the emotions thus improving your choices and actions. Remove the emotions from the equation. Ana, Christian is merely controlling what he can in a situation that is out of his control."

"That's what scares me John. Christian said that he can't trust me and he has to make decisions using those facts and not let the fact that he loves me enter into his decision. What if he leaves me? John we love each other. We would be miserable without each other. His lousy facts don't seem to take that into consideration."

"Ana. Christian also knows that the facts take into consideration that he was a shadow of a man living shell of a life until he met you. He knows what you have together. I doubt seriously that he would consider it good judgment to give that up." He smiles sympathetically at me. "My suggestion, don't push him. Give him space and he'll come around alright. He has a lot to take in right now. His entire self-concept is in flux. He will realize that the man he is, is the man he has made himself to be, not who his parents are or where he came from."

"I hope you are right. I just hate it when he puts me through this crap."

"Yes that does sum up the problem doesn't it?" he chuckles. "It must be terribly distressing putting your life on hold waiting for him make a decision regarding your future."

"Yes. It's like he isn't giving me any part in this decision."

"Perhaps he feels that when you contacted this grandmother person without consulting him, that _ was_ your input into the decision. It was your decision to go outside the marriage by going against his wishes. It is his life and it was his decision to make."

"Yes. It was. I've apologized. I don't know what else to do John."

"There really is nothing else to do right now. Christian has to come around to all of this himself. Just make sure that in the future, you make these decisions together. Deceit, no matter how well intended, is not a positive element to add to a marriage."

"I know. I remember when he had that relationship with Amy Patterson. It wasn't easy to forgive him, but I did."

"Have you reminded him of that ?"

"No."

"Why is that?"

"I promised myself that if I decided to forgive him and move on that I wouldn't hold it over his head. Throwing it up to him won't accomplish anything other than to drive us farther apart. I was the one who was wrong this time."

"Very wise decision and very intuitive. It's impossible to move forward if you are always looking backward. If you are going to forgive someone then make up your mind to do it and put it in the past. It seems to be human nature to want to go tit for tat when having an argument, but it really is counter-productive."

"Yes." I nod.

"You can't control what Christian is thinking so let it go. He'll make his own decisions about things. In the meantime take care of yourself and the children. It will all work out."

"I know. I just want it to work out the way I want it to."

"Oh, if life were that easy."

"John, you sound as if Christian has been in to see you."

"Now you know that is not a road we can travel , Ana."

"I know. I just always hope that when he has issues, that he comes to see you. I can't ask him. It's up to him to work things out. I just always hope that he asks for help when he needs it."

"Well I hate to ask , but what have you done to your arm?"

"That's another story. I assume you know that Christian had a panic attack one night and we had to take him to the emergency room. I mean he has told me that he was seeing you for help with managing those."

He nods.

"Well, we were …playing and I was handcuffed at the time of his panic attack. I broke my wrist trying to get free to call for help. We have new rules. No restraints I can't get out of in an emergency." I smirk at him.

"Sounds like a good plan. Well I'm glad to see you still have your sense of humor about things. Unless you have something else, I do believe our time is up for today. Do you need another appointment or was today just a needed tune up?"

"Hopefully a tune up. If Christian leaves me, I will need more than another appointment."

"Not to worry." He reassures me as we both stand up and I prepare to leave. "I have faith in Mr. Grey. He has come so far since we first began. I'd love to write a paper if it weren't for that pesky NDA he insists on."

"That's exactly why he insists on it John." I give him a smile.

"Yes. Exactly. Good to see you again and, and as always, call if you need anything."

"I will. Thanks again."

Driving home in the R8 I have the top down and the breeze and sun feel great. Okay, okay, it beats a Honda all to hell. All that is missing is Christian. Tears begin in to well in my eyes and spill over wetting my cheeks. Now I realize just why I should never have done what I did. It never dawned on me that perhaps Christian wasn't ready to hear a different account of his start. John was right. We all have an idea of who we are and where we come from. To just walk in and change that for him must have pulled the rug out from under him. Add to that the idea that his wife broke a trust with him and I can see why he is so hurt. Trust doesn't come easily for Christian and I broke that. God I miss him. Knowing how I've hurt him makes me miss him even more.


	43. Chapter 43

_**Fifty Shades…Full Circle**_

_**Chapter 43**_

"Hi Gail. I'm home. How are things at the manor?" I ask as I thumb through the mail.

"Just fine. The kids and canine are outside playing. How was your appointment?" she asks.

"Good. As usual he takes what I already know and makes me see it."

"And to think you have to have a degree and a license to do that. Well you seem in a better mood."

"Have you heard from Christian or Taylor?"

"Taylor managed to call. He says they are still in Pittsburg. Mr. Grey is making progress, but no idea when they'll be returning. He hates the hotel. Mr. Grey is being a shitcicle; cold shit on a stick. Don't tell him I told you that."

"Oh. Glad to see his mood is not just reserved for me."

"Any ideas for dinner? I'm out." Gail asks as she collects the junk mail to shred.

"How about hot dogs?" I ask. "I know, I'm not that fond of them either, but the kids like them and it's hard to have those kinds of meals when Christian's here."

She shrugs. "It's fine with me. Easy to fix and easy to clean up."

"How about adding some of your Mac and Cheese to go with that? Please?" I ask timidly.

"I knew it wasn't going to be that easy" she smirks. " Sure. Baked Mac and Cheese it is. Mr. Grey won't like that he missed it though."

"Well, we can make more when he gets back." I hang my keys on the key hook next to the garage door in the kitchen. "Gail. I have to get through this next manuscript this evening I have suggestions to turn in on it by Thursday. I'll be in my office for a while."

"Okay. I'll call when dinner is ready."

As I walk to my office, I pass by Christian's. I can't help but walk in and sit in his chair. As I nestle down into the soft leather, I can feel the permanent indentation that his bottom has made in it over the years. It feels comforting to sit where he sits so often. As I lean forward and my arms spread out over his desk, I remember the times he has taken me on this desk. The tender romantic times, the raw lusty times and the funny playful times we've had sex here. I love creeping in here late at night while he is working and sneaking into his lap forcing him to stop and pay attention to me. He always makes me feel like a precious, welcomed respite. How can I live without him? He has to understand that I know I was wrong. I just don't understand how I didn't see it. Maybe it's because, no matter what I do he always forgives me. He can give me some major grief over it, but he always forgives me. He shelters me, he loves me, he treats me like a precious treasure; almost as though I'll break if he doesn't protect me.

We belong to each other. I can't imagine ever being with anyone else. I certainly don't want to imagine Christian being with anyone else. God, I need to get that image out of my head. I need to get to work and get my mind off of all of this. I walk into my office and close the door behind me. Turning some Chris Botti on in the background I begin to wade through this disaster. How can the one yesterday be so good and this one is such garbage? Whoever told this person she could write, and why?

The more I try to read this drivel, the more I keep thinking about Christian's desk and all the times we spent on it. My breathing is becoming more rapid and I can feel myself getting extremely needy. Sighing deeply, I throw the written piece of 'art' on my desk and lean back in my white leather chair. God, I need Christian. Now I have to add horny to the list of crappy feelings I'm dealing with. If I'm feeling this way, Christian must be absolutely miserable. No wonder he is acting like a shitcicle. I think I'll text him. He's probably out to dinner right now, so I can't call him.

Hi. Thinking about you. How R things?

A.

* * *

In the middle of a business dinner. Will

get back to you later.

C.

* * *

K. Bye. Love you.

A.

* * *

Well that only served to make me feel worse. He always talks to me no matter what he is doing. Maybe I've just been spoiled. Do most husbands drop what they are doing in the middle of multi-billion dollar deals to sext with their wife? My guess is most husbands don't regularly participate in multi-billion dollar business deals. Fuck. I hate this. I toss my phone down on my desk and as I walk out of my office, I run into Myra.

"Hi Myra. How's it going?"

"Oh, fine, Mrs. Grey. Almost finished."

"Myra, do you have dinner plans?"

"Well nothing special. Just a frozen casserole."

"Would you like to stay and have dinner with me and the kids. Gail will be eating with us as well. All of us are pretty much on our own tonight. We might as well share the misery."

"Okay. Sure. I'd like that."

"Well before you get too excited, we're having hotdogs and Mac and Cheese."

"It doesn't matter. I'm sure it beats eating by myself."

"Good. I'm not sure when Gail will have it ready. Shouldn't be too long."

"Okay. I'll change out of my work clothes. Thank you."

Heading to the kitchen I let Gail know that there will be one more for dinner.

* * *

It's almost nine o'clock. I haven't heard back from Christian. Some of his business dinners can run late but it should be almost midnight there. He's probably still up on his laptop. I'll try to call him. Am I just a glutton for punishment? Probably.

"Hello Anastasia."

"Hi Sweetheart. I didn't hear back from you and was just a little worried."

"No need to worry. I can take care of myself."

"I can think of a few times that you've gotten in a tight spot, Mr. Grey." Silence. "How did your dinner go?"

"It went. Just the usual business discussion and a lot of expensive wine."

"Oh. I'm sorry."

"Don't be. How are the children?"

"They are good. They miss you. I let them have hot dogs and Mac and Cheese for dinner."

"Sounds better than what I had and I'm sure a sight less expensive."

"I let them have that sort of thing when you're gone as a treat. They both slept with me last night. Oh and Jack. I think he misses you as much as the kids do."

"I miss them as well."

"Christian. Do you know how much longer you'll be gone?"

"I'll be home when I'm finished here, Anastasia."

"I miss you so much. I can't wait for you to get home."

"It's late. I really need to get to bed. I'll call and check on the kids tomorrow."

"Okay. I love you, Christian."

"Good night, Anastasia."

I was right. Glutton for punishment.

* * *

Turning in my final notes to Connie to compile into a report on the three manuscripts I've waded through, I push myself away from the computer and stretch.  
"Oh, god that feels good. My eyes are killing me. I haven't done this much reading in ages. Maybe I need to get some of those computer glasses that Christian has. Today is Thursday and I still don't know when he'll be home. Maybe, I'll call him this evening and see if he knows what his plans are. Our anniversary is the day after tomorrow. I know he'll be home by then. He's never missed an anniversary.

I can't help but smile when I think about last year and the Heathman. What a time that was. Four days of nothing but Christian Grey all to myself. I remember how he chased me around the hotel room and spanked me. And then finally having sex in the elevator….our elevator. Well actually I guess since it's in my name, it's my elevator. And all those deserts all over the floor. Actually this year I would settle for him to just walk through the door.

I bury my head in my folded arms on my desk, "Oh God. I'm so miserable and sad. I just want Christian." I begin to sob. "I just want him to come home. I want him to want me again. I want to change what I've done."

As I look up I see my phone and pick it up dialing him.

"Grey. What is it Anastasia?"

I know he can hear the tears in my voice. "Christian do you have a minute?" I sniff in his ear.

"Anastasia, I'm busy.."

"PLEASE. Just a minute."

"Alright."

"Christian. When are you coming home?"

"I'm not sure. It will probably be Monday."

"Monday?! What about Saturday?"

"What about Saturday, Anastasia?"

"Christian you know very well. It's our anniversary. Aren't you going to be here?"

"I doubt it. I'm not finished up here."

"But sweetheart, you've never missed an anniversary. You promised you'd always be here for our anniversary." I can't hold back my tears any longer. I miss him. I want him here.

"Anastasia, it can't be helped. I need to be here."

"Christian, it's Saturday," I sniffle, "Can't you fly home and then fly back on Monday?"

"No. Not this time. Look I'll be home when I can get there. It just can't be helped."

"But Christian…"

"Anastasia, I have to go. I have people waiting for me. We'll talk later. And please stop crying."

"Okay. Christian I love you so much. Please believe me, I'm sorry."

"Yes. I need to go."

Damn I just keep punishing myself. Maybe I could fly to Pittsburg to surprise him. I even don't know where he's staying. He'd probably have a fit. If he didn't want to kiss me good bye, he probably won't want me in his hotel room. He's on business. I hate to intrude on him when his involved in one of these things. He says it breaks his concentration. If I caused him to blow a big deal on top of what has already happened, I'd really be in hot water. I know he'll be home. He's never broken a promise to me. He said he'd always be here and he will.

I'll call Kate. We haven't talked in ages. I need to call Mia too. I haven't heard if they've found a house yet. I look for Kate in my phone and tap the screen.

"Hey, Kate. Got a minute?"

"Sure Steele. What's up?"

"Nothing much. We just haven't talked in a while and I thought I'd give you a call."

"Well I'm glad you did. I was going to call you this evening anyway. Would you like to go to the cemetery with me tomorrow?"

"Well ….I haven't been in ages." God can I get any more depressed? " I guess so. Sure."

"Oh good. I wanted to go and Elliott doesn't like going. I understand that he doesn't but I need to go occasionally."

"I understand. What time?"

"Is ten o'clock okay? I enjoy going in the morning."

"Sure. That will give us some time to talk. I haven't talked to you in ages."

"What's he done, Ana?"

"What?"

"Christian. What's he done? I can hear it in your voice."

"Oh, nothing really. We're just on the outs right now. It's a big misunderstanding. Actually he's out of town in a business trip at the moment."

"Oh, and you have an anniversary Saturday I believe."

"Yes. I believe I do. We can talk about it tomorrow. Have you heard from Mia and Ethan recently?"

"Actually I talked to Ethan last night. They told Grace and Carrick. They are over the moon. Another little Grey on the way, only this time it will be a Kavanaugh." I can hear her laugh.

"Is Mia okay? I've been so busy I haven't called her like I should have."

"I think so. As thin as she was to start with, she has actually lost some weight. Ethan is constantly on her to try to eat. Poor thing can't stand the sight of food right now."

"Oh gosh, I remember that. I feel for her."

"Me too."

"Kate you never got morning sickness."

"I know, but still feel sorry for her."

"Okay. Look come pick me up. I'll see you about ten."

"You mean we aren't going to drive that R8 with the top down?"

"We can take the R8. Just be here at ten."

"Okay. See ya' then Steele."

"Bye."

I want to go to the cemetery and then again I don't. I haven't been in ages. Kate will keep my spirits up.

* * *

After another night of tossing and turning, I wake to an infrequent sunny Seattle morning. I got to sleep by myself last night. It felt good to stretch out and take up the whole bed. But I ended up on Christian's side, clinging to his pillow. I won't let Myra change the sheets, because they still have the faint smell of him. He has been gone so long on this trip. I have no idea what kind of deal he is working on. Things have been so busy with my job and trip that I haven't asked him much about GEH in a while. I need to do that. Even though he won't tell me much, I still like to act like I'm interested in the business. And actually I am. I just don't always understand it all.

I need to get up and shower. Kate will be here in a while. I'm not sure I'm up for going to see Sam today, but it will be a comfort to have Kate there and I can be there for her as well. I'm almost in a better mood. Tomorrow is Saturday and I just know Christian will be back. I just know he will. I just want him to thaw out enough to talk to me. Christian has had his moments of doing awful things inside of this marriage and I treated him terribly. But this time I did it. It's my turn to try to ride it out and make amends. I just need to let him work through his feelings and be there when he is ready to talk about it.

As I finish getting dressed I walk down to get tea and see my kids. After I kiss them good morning Gail got them dressed and probably fed. Getting to the kitchen, they are still at the breakfast table eating bacon and eggs. After I fix my tea I grab a plate and gather some bacon and toast. I'm not really hungry, but I'm going through the motions. I kiss Teddy on his head, "Good morning sweetheart. How are you this morning?"

"I'm good Mom," he grins up at me.

"Me too….I good too, Mama." Grace squeals over at us.

"Mmmmmowa. I give her a big exaggerated kiss on her cheek. "You look good. Almost good enough to eat." Wiping my mouth, "Ewww. You have breakfast all over your face." I wipe her face with her napkin, "This is what these white things are for." I kiss her again before I sit down with them to eat my bacon and toast.

"So what does everyone have planned for today?" I ask as I sip my tea.

"I'm waitin' for Dad to get home." Teddy throws in. "I don't know why he has to go away to do business. His building is here. Why can't he do it in his building?"

"Well. Sometimes he just has to go meet people and talk to them to work out any problems that they may have."

"Can't they come here?" he asks.

"I guess they could, but then they would be away from their families. Daddy knows that you can get a lot farther with people if you go to them." I try to explain.

"So he's pretty good at business?" he asks.

"Yes, Sweetheart. Your dad is very good at business."

"Mom?"

"Yes, baby."

"What is business?"

"Well…I uh...I. You know I can't give you a very good explanation. We can look it up in the dictionary, but I don't think that will explain it very well either. Maybe daddy can tell you when he gets home."

"Why is Daddy so good at business?" he asks.

"I think some people are just born with a talent for doing things and Daddy is good at business. He is good at knowing what people want and giving it to them while getting what he wants in exchange."

"Is it money? Does he get lots of money?"

"Sometimes. And sometimes he gives them money in exchange for what they have." I try to explain. "But that's not all he does. "Sometimes, Daddy feels like we have so much that he wants to use some of it to take care of other people."

"Like who? Who does he take care of?"

"Well there are people who don't have a place to live or enough to eat and he tries to help them." I sip my tea. "You know sweetheart, not every little girl and boy wake up and have breakfast on the table. Not everyone has a warm dry bed to sleep in." I can't help but think about Tommy and wonder if he is hungry and being taken care of. "Your Daddy doesn't like that and he tries to help."

"How does help?"

"Sometimes he gives money to organizations that provide food. And sometimes he buys big quantities of food and supplies and sends them to people that need them. Your daddy has such a big kind heart, Teddy. He wants everyone to be safe and not be hungry."

"Daddy's a good guy isn't he?"

"Yes, baby. Your daddy is a very good guy." I wipe tears from my cheeks as I think about the good man I married. I just hope we can repair this. "Here you go." Jack is on three point stance and I give him a bite of bacon. "It looks like you miss daddy, too."

"Are you workin' today Mom?" Teddy asks wiping his milk moustache.

"Later on. I have to go somewhere with Aunt Kate this morning," I explain, "but I should be back after lunch."

"Da be back tomowow, Mama?" Grace asks.

"I'm not sure baby. I hope so, but he may have to stay until the first of the week. I'm sure he'll let us know when he is coming back."

"I mith Da, Mama."

"I do too. So we'll be really happy when he gets home."

"Can we hab hot dogs agin tonight?"

"Ohh. I doubt it. Aren't you ready for some better food?"

She gives me an exaggerated shake of her head, "NO."

"Well we can't live on hotdogs. How about some chicken strips? You like chicken."

I get the same exaggerated gesture but this time it is a nod.

"Okay. Use your napkin." She gives her mouth a big wipe with the linen.

"Oh, It's time for Aunt Kate to be here. I need to find my purse. You two finish your breakfast."

It isn't much time before I hear Kate's voice echo through the house. "Steele. Are you ready?"

Gail appears, "Ms. Kate is here. I guess you could hear."

"Yes. I heard thanks Gail. I'll be back after lunch."

Running down the stairs I see Kate in the foyer talking to Teddy and Grace. "Hey. Here I am. I'm ready to go."

"Bye kids. I'll see you in a couple of hours."

Leaving through the kitchen door to the garage we slide into the R8 and I let the top down as the garage door opens.

"Next time Christian gets you a new one of these, can you just give me the old one?" Kate laughs.

"I'll see what we can work out." I can feel the sun hit my face, "Gosh it's a beautiful day."

"Then why do you look like shit?" Kate asks.

"Thanks. I feel better already."

"No. Really. What's going on? We have a drive to the cemetery. Spill it."

"Oh Kate. Christian is so mad at me."

"You two had a fight then."

"No. Worse. He isn't speaking to me. He has just closed himself off and won't talk to me."

"What in the world happened?"

"Do you remember earlier in the year when we went to get our dresses fitted for Mia's wedding and then went out to lunch?"

"Yes."

"Do you remember me pointing out a man in camel coat that I thought was following me?"

"Yes. I thought you had lost your mind."

"Well he was following me. It seems Christian's biological grandmother had been trying to contact him for a while and Christian wouldn't respond to her. She decided to try to contact me instead."

"Oh my goodness."

"That guy was her private detective and he left a note for me with Caroline. When I got it Virginia, that's Christian's grandmother's name, asked me to contact her. I think she thought that she might be able to contact him through me."

"Oh Ana. You didn't."

"Yes. I did. Kate Christian just thinks so little of himself because of his biological parents and I thought if I could help with that …"

"Oh Ana. I know Elliott has never been interested in who his parents were, but I've just had to leave that up to him. That's something that he just has to do himself when he is ready."

"Well. I didn't. I met with her when I was in Sacramento last week and Christian found out about it."

"Shit! No wonder he's upset." She shakes her head and frowns as she looks out the window. "Ana, I know you have only the best of intentions, but you just have to stop trying to fix everything."

"Kate I know that." I begin to cry. "I just wanted to try to help him. He has carried this self- hatred because of his parents around all his life." I sob as I try to drive. "I just wanted to give him a little peace about it."

"Hey, watch the road! Do I need to drive?"

"I'm fine. You just want any opportunity to drive my car."

"That's right. Don't make me take it away from you."

"Any way, I was waiting for the right time to talk to him about it and his damn security beat me to the punch and told him that his grandmother had been in Sacramento the same time I was. He ask me if I needed to tell him anything and I couldn't lie to him. I had to tell him what happened."

"And that's when he stopped talking to you?"

"Yes. He said he had to think about our marriage in light of the fact that I had betrayed him. He said he had to take his feelings about me out of his decision."

"What fucking decision?"

"Well he never really said for sure, just that he needed to think about continuing in a relationship where there was no trust." I really start to cry again.

"Oh, pe shaw! Steele that man can't live without you. Now I'm not saying what you did was right. I mean adoption is tricky. The adoptees aren't always gung ho to find out what their past is. You know. Like Elliott. He is just fine with Grace and Carrick. He really never has shown any interest in finding his birth parents. But if he wants to, it will be up to him to want to do it. I mean I'll support him whatever he wants to do, but that is strictly his business."

"Well I know that now." I am still crying as we pull into Lake View and park. "Kate I can't live without him. What am I going to do? He hates me."

"He doesn't hate you. If he did, he'd be gone by now. He's just trying to work it out. Give him some space."

"No Kate. I think I've really hurt him."

"Look," she leans over and puts her hand on mine," he probably is really hurt. But he has hurt you in the past and you've worked through it. Give him credit to know that he loves you. Christian is a smart man. Smarter than most," she smirks. "Give him some credit that he'll figure it out. Now come on. Let's go visit our children."

Kate and I walk up to the Grey section and sit on the bench in the little garden. "How are you doing with this?" she asks as she puts her arm around me.

"You mean Sam?"

"Yes. I mean Sam."

"It's like you said it would be. Second by second, minute by minute, day by day. I can't decide which is worse to lose Sam before I even got to have him. Or like you to have Ava for a bit and then lose her."

"I don't think anyway is easier. It just sucks."

"Why won't Elliott come here with you?"

"Does Christian come with you?"

"No. But it hasn't been that long since Sam. Ava's been gone a while."

"It doesn't matter. Losing a child is losing a child. Coming here is a pain Elliott just prefers not to inflict on himself." She sighs, "I still wish I had a little girl."

"Have another one. You could still do it."

"No. I'm out of the baby business. I like what I have."

"You could adopt."

"I know and we have thought about it, but things are good right now. I think Elliott and I are where we need to be with our family." Pointing to the marker in our section, "Hey when you and Christian get that?"

"The marker? It was after we buried Sam. We decided to get the marker to claim our spot next to Sam. I wanted him to know that we were close and would be with him someday."

"What does it say?" she walks over to it. " Christian Trevelyan-Grey and Anastasia Steele Grey. '…._do not leave me in this abyss, where I cannot find you! Oh, God! It is unutterable! I cannot live without my life! I cannot live without my soul!_'." She turns and walks back to me. "_Wuthering Heights_. Heathcliff and Catherine. Hmm. Well, this is not a man that is going to leave you."

"He knows I like Bronte."

"He knows you love him."


	44. Chapter 44

_**Fifty Shades…Full Circle**_

_**Chapter 44**_

**A/N: I don't usually post two chapters this close together, but it is their anniversary.**

* * *

Well here it is. Happy fucking anniversary Anastasia. Christian didn't call last night. I didn't call or text him either. I decided I had been doing it ever since he left and it was getting us nowhere. Although difficult, I'll take Kate's and Flynn's advice and give him his space. I guess today will be the test. He said he'd never miss an anniversary and that's today. He's been gone since Monday. Today will be five days. He hasn't been gone this long since he was held in Colombia. I thought I'd never see him again. I thought he was dead. I can't help but feel the tears fall from the corners of my eyes and trail down my temples into my hair as I stare up at the ceiling.

I was excited for today to come because I knew he would be home by now. Now that it's Saturday and he still isn't home, I'm scared. I'm scared that he won't be home at all. My gut keeps telling me that if he doesn't come home today, that he won't be coming home. Reaching for the nightstand I grab my phone to see if there are any messages or missed calls. Nothing. Silence.

The quiet of the Saturday morning house, is broken by my phone ringing. Grabbing it with high expectations that it's my husband I'm disappointed to see that it is Grace. I almost let it go to voice mail, but decide to answer instead.

"Grace. Good morning."

"Good morning Ana. I just wanted to call and wish you a happy anniversary. I hope I didn't disturb you and Christian calling so early."

"No. You're fine. I was awake and Christian is still away on business."

"Still?"

"Yes. I'm not sure when he'll be home."

"Oh dear. That's not like him. Is it serious?"

"I'm not sure Grace. He doesn't always include me on his business dealings. I'm not sure just what it's all about."

"Well, I was wondering if you wanted to come for lunch."

"Umm." I'm trying to wake up enough to clear the fog and give her an answer. "Uh, sure. That sounds nice. I can't guarantee that Christian will be there."

"Well if he isn't back we'll see him later. We haven't seen the kids in ages."

"We've just been so busy lately Grace. We'll try to do better."

"Noon shall we say then?"

"Yes that sounds fine. We'll see you then."

I really don't want to leave the house in case Christian comes home, but then maybe this will make the time pass by faster. I guess I can leave a note letting him know where we are. Jack is bouncing and running in circles. I think that's his breakfast dance. Shrugging into my robe I take him downstairs and give him his breakfast as I heat water for tea.

"Good morning, Ana." Gail scares me as she walks into the kitchen.

"Goodness. What are you doing here this morning? It's Saturday."

"With Jason being gone, I thought I'd wander over and see what everyone is up to today."

"Nothing yet. I was just giving Jack his breakfast. The kids are still asleep."

"Speaking of Jack. Teddy said Mr. Grey ate Jack's dog cookies." I can see a wicked grin spread across her face.

"Yes. He thought they were crackers. He actually asked me to ask you to make some more until he found out that they were dog treats." I can't help but chuckle.

"You can tell him they are fine to eat. I use the same ingredients in them that I use for the family. They are totally safe for him to eat. And I have restocked the cookie canister. He and Jack are back in business." She pours herself a cup of freshly made coffee as I drag the bag through my hot water.

"Speaking of Mr. Grey, have you heard from him?"

"No Gail. Not a word since Thursday." I toss the bag into the garbage. "I have no idea of where he is or what he's doing. Much less when he's coming home."

"What do you want to do about your anniversary?"

"Well, I guess just keep things as planned and hope for the best."

"You still want me to take the kids tonight?"

"Can you? If he gets home I want to be alone with him and if he doesn't, I intend to drink way too much."

"I have faith in Mr. Grey. Don't worry. I'll be glad to have them."

"Grace has invited us for lunch today. Just take today off as usual and we'll see you late this afternoon. And thanks."

"No problem. I think I'll go throw my feet up, drink a pot of coffee and watch some sappy movies on that Love channel."

"My God, you've gone off the deep end Mrs. Taylor. If it gets to be too much, I have a stack of manuscripts on my desk. Help yourself. I can't vouch for them, so read at your own risk. "

"Thanks. I'll see you later. Have fun at the Grey's."

"Riiiight." I roll my eyes. " Later."

Okay, Mrs. Grey. Let's get these kids up and get this show on the road.

* * *

We pull up at Grace and Carrick's and the kids can't wait to get out of the car. Once I get them unstrapped and extricated they run to the door and burst in.

Following close behind them, I meet Grace at the door as she greets me. I get a hug and a kiss on my cheek. "Hello darling. How are you?"

"I'm okay. Sorry about my heathens. They do know how to act even if they don't show it."

"Oh, they're just being children. I'm used to it. Mine used to do the same thing."

"I can't believe your children ever misbehaved, Grace." I tell her as we walk arm in arm into the house.

She laughs, "Oh my. Elliott was a mischievous little rascal, Mia was too prissy to ever listen to anyone and Christian….well Christian always did the exact opposite of what we told him to do. They are all so different….still are. Speaking of my son, is he still not back?"

"No. No Grace he is still out of town in Pittsburg. At least I assume he is in Pittsburg. I really have no idea where he is."

"This isn't sounding good. Are you having a disagreement?" she asks as we arrive in the kitchen.

"I guess you could call it that. It certainly isn't a fight."

"What do you mean?"

"Well you have to speak to one another to have a fight. Christian isn't talking to me."

"Not talking? He has withdrawn?"

"I guess you could call it that. He calls it controlling his emotions."

"Yes. He used to do that with Carrick and me. When he would get into trouble and we would try to talk to him he would clam up; refuse to talk. He would just sit there and stare at us. I swear he could look right through you when he decided to. It could be a bit disarming at times."

"I know."

"Well I see the kids are out in the yard with the dog and Carrick." She pours me a glass of wine without asking if I want one. "Here. We have time before lunch. Do you want to tell me what's going on?"

Well not really, but maybe Grace has some insight into this whole thing. "Grace, I think I've asked you this before, but are you aware of any biological family that might be out there for Christian?" I ask as I take a sip of the dry white wine.

"Well. Not really. Oh, I always suspected that perhaps one day someone would creep out of the woodwork. I also know that Christian wouldn't leave any stone unturned in investigating his past. I always lived in fear that one of the children's relatives would step forward and try to take them or cause trouble. But we've been lucky. No one has ever tried anything.

"Of course, Carrick and I would fully support them if that's what they choose to do, but none of the kids ever really showed any interest in finding any family. I think Mia thought about it at one time." She smiles thinking about what she is telling me. "She was just sure she descended from royalty or was some long lost daughter of a movie star, but I don't think she ever acted on it. At least if she did, she never mentioned it."

"I see. I'm not sure if I should mention this. Christian is just so private."

"Don't say anything if you feel uncomfortable. I'm sure this is between you and Christian."

"It is, but…I just don't know how to handle it. Someone has come forward and he is having difficulty with it. And it is my fault."

"Oh, I see. My poor baby. I was hoping none of the kids would have to deal with any of this, but I guess this is part of it. But Darling, how is this your fault?"

"Christian didn't want anything to do with it. He had no interest, but I went behind his back and made contact. Grace he has just carried all this baggage around about his mother all these years. I just wanted him to have a true picture of where he came from."

"Ana. Christian came from this house. He came from me and Carrick and Elliott and Mia. Someone else gave birth to him and I thank God every day for that woman, whoever she was. He had a rough start and went through some horrible things before he came to us," I can see tears well in her eyes as begin to spill over. "But he is ours. He is our son. He has the values and love and upbringing that we gave him."

"I know Grace. You and Carrick are his parents. You gave him everything. He just thinks less of himself because of who is birth mother was and who he thinks his father is."

"Christian knows who his father is?" she asks almost shocked.

"Well, he thinks he does. But he's wrong and I just wanted him to know that."

"I see. Ana, this has to be something he wants to hear. He has to be prepared to hear it. You can't do that for him."

I can feel the tears spill over my eyes and down my cheeks. "I know Grace. I was wrong. I just can't get him to listen to me. He won't let me apologize."

She comes around and puts her arms around me. "Oh, Ana. Sweetheart, I know you were just doing what you thought was best for him. You always have his best interest at heart. But give him some time, darling. You know how he likes to control everything. Just give him some time to get his bearings back."

"I'm trying. I'm just so afraid he'll leave me over it. I've really messed up, Grace."

"Somehow I can't envision him leaving you. Come on," she rubs my arm and smiles, " lets get lunch on and forget about this for a while. I have confidence in my son. He's not a stupid man. He knows where home is."

"Thanks Grace. I hope we can work through this. If he'll just come home so we can talk." I take a couple of gulps of the wine and try to change the subject. " Not to change the subject, but I hear Mia is expecting?"

"Oh, heavens yes." I can see the twinkle return to her eyes. " I know they were waiting for the first trimester but, I could spank her for not telling me sooner. I'm so happy for her. It took them so long to finally get married that I guess they aren't wasting any time getting started on a family."

"I know. I'm really happy for her and Ethan."

"Darling how are you doing? We haven't talked in a while, but is everything going alright for you and Christian about…..well….Sam?"

"Yes. I think we are doing as well as can be expected. We have ups and downs. Kate and I went to the cemetery yesterday. Elliott doesn't like going so we went together. I was asking her which she thought was worse, losing one before they are born and you never have that chance to really have them or losing them after they are born and you have that bond."

"I don't know that there is a better or worse way. It's just unspeakable no matter how it happens."

"I can't imagine how Kate got through, it losing Ava so suddenly after just a couple of weeks. If I ever lost Teddy or Grace, I don't think I could go on living."

"My heart just broke for Kate and Elliott. They were so devastated. They did everything right. There is just no explanation for SIDS. Sometimes things happen and we just have to do the best we can to deal with it." Grace forces a smile on her face and wipes her cheek. " Goodness, I didn't mean for today to be so sad. Where are my grandchildren? I invited them over to be able to spend some time with them."

Teddy and Grace are already covered in sweat when they are called in for lunch. Grace has cooked a delicious chicken pot pie and the kids devour it. Grace and Carrick haven't really seen the kids in a couple of weeks and most of our time is spent with the kids visiting with their grandparents. After several hours of chatting about the kids I realize that my Grace could use a nap. I doubt they'll get much sleep tonight. Sleeping over with Gail will have them totally wound up. After arriving back home I get us parked in the garage and Teddy unbuckles and tears out of the car. I get Grace unbuckled and out of her car seat.

"Mama, ith Da commin' home today?" Grace asks me.

Scooping her up in my arms, "I don't know sweetie. I sure hope so though. Are you about ready for a nap?"

"No. No nap."

"Yes, nap. You're spending the night with Gail tonight. Remember? You need to be all rested up."

"I west at Gay Gay's waiter."

"How about if I lie down with you for a while? Would you like that? We can lie down on the sofa and watch some TV."

"Okay. Juth a wittle."

"Okay. Agreed. Just a little."

I finally get Teddy on the floor in front of the TV and I am lying on the sofa with my arms around Grace. I have her pulled up tight against me and I'm running my fingers through her hair. It's finally quiet and peaceful and Grace's eyes are losing their battle to stay open. All of a sudden I just can't stand it anymore. I'm just overwhelmed with sadness. This is my anniversary. I don't think I can deal with this much longer. I can feel the tears spill down my cheeks and I just want Christian. I miss him so much. I need him. I want him to come home. I want to hear him tell me he loves me. I want to feel him next to me. I can't hold it back and feel my body shuddering trying to stifle a cry.

"Wots wong Mama?" I can hear Grace's little voice.

Forcing a smile through the tears. "Nothing baby. I just miss Daddy, so much."

"Da be home thoon. Done cwy Mama." She puts her little hand on my cheek. I can't help but smile and kiss her little fingers.

"I know sweetheart. Sometimes I just miss him very much. I didn't mean to wake you up."

"I not sweep." I can't help but pull her close and breathe in the scent of her hair.

Looking up I see Gail walking in. "Ana, What do you want me to do about dinner?"

"Well since Chateaubriand is a meal for two, and right now it looks like there will only be one for dinner, just put it in the fridge and we'll do something with it later."

"But what do you want to eat?"

"Oh, I'm not really hungry Gail. I'll find something."

"Ana, you've hardly eaten all week. Mr. Grey won't like that."

"Well he'll have to come home to notice if I've eaten or not. Don't worry."

"There is some cold baked chicken in the refrigerator and left over Mac and cheese, along with some fruit and various other things. If you won't let me make you something, promise me you'll find something and eat it later?"

"I will. Are you going to feed the kids?"

"Yes. I thought I'd feed them when I take them tonight. We'll eat at our apartment. You are welcome to come as well if you like."

"Thanks, but I think I'll just stay here and take a hot bath and wait."

"Sure?" she cocks her head and gives me a questioning look.

"Yes. I'm sure."

* * *

After turning the kids over to Gail, I wander upstairs and start a bath. Pouring in the foaming oil produces clouds of sweet scented bubbles. After pulling up my hair and stripping down, I descend into the warm clouds and ease back relaxing. Gosh this feels good. I've been on edge and crying all week. I can't believe that he isn't as miserable as I am. At least he has this work thing to take his mind off of it. I don't know what ever made me think I could do this for him. Everyone has been telling me it has to be his decision and he has to be ready to do it. I can see that now. I just love him so damn much and I wanted to make things better for him. I always had an uneasy feeling about it, but I just thought that he'd be so happy that he wouldn't be angry. Why did it have tohappen right now?I ruined my own anniversary.

Almost falling asleep in the tub, I jerk awake and force my eyes open. It's almost eight o'clock. I guess I'd better get out and dry off. Just in case, I've powdered and primped, plucked and shaved. I'm ready even if he isn't. I slip into my white satin thong and wander into Christian's closet. Fondling his suites I bury my nose in them and take in the scent that lingers on them. There is a pile of worn white dress shirts that need to go to the cleaner. Picking one up I examine it. All of his shirts have his initials monogramed on his cuffs in miniscule letters. I guess that's so that if anyone forgets who they are dealing with all they have to do is glance at his cuff and they are reminded. God it smells like him and it hasn't been laundered since he last wore it. I shrug it on and wrap myself in it making me feel closer to him somehow. It's huge on me coming almost midway down my thigh. Not bothering to button it, I decide to get a bottle of champagne that is in the cooler. I've never been good at opening these things, but manage to pop the cork without spilling most of it on the floor. Pouring a glass, I down it fairly quickly.

I decide to scoot up on the bed and read another manuscript and pour another glass while I wait for Christian to get home. Every time headlights flood the room I think it's him, but my heart sinks when it always turns out to be a passing car. Ten o'clock and still no husband and half way through the bottle of pale amber liquid. Mmmm. The more I drink of this the better it tastes. A couple of more glasses and reading is becoming useless. I can't concentrate anymore. I don't know if it's the wine, or the time but I just want to sob.

I get up to go to the bathroom and realize that I've had more to drink than I realized. On the way back, I go to my closet and pull out the large framed photo that I'm giving Christian for his anniversary present. I prop it up against the chair and tear the wrapping paper away and stare at the photo Jose took of us at our wedding. All I can do is begin to sob again as I stare at the black and white picture. Stumbling back toward the bed I knock over the bottle of champagne spilling some on the carpet. I'll clean it up later and as I pick it up, I pour another glass draining the bottle of what is left in it. I lie back across the bed and stare at the ceiling allowing my tears to stream down into my hair. My shirt has fallen open and I lie there trying to balance the champagne glass on my bare tummy. Yes, I've had way too much to drink. Gosh I could just fall asleep. It's either the champagne or I'm so tired from crying, but I'm exhausted. I can feel my eyes beginning to close and fighting it is not working. Maybe I can close them for just a few minutes.

I finally drift off thinking about Christian and wondering where he is and why he didn't come home. I suddenly jump awake as I feel something. I pry my eyes open to feel Christian's arms around me. God I hope I'm not dreaming. I hope he's really here.

"Christian?" I croak waking from my champagne fog.

"Yes, baby?" he whispers.

"You're here." I turn to face him and throw my arms around him as I begin to sob into his chest. " What time is it?"

"It's about eleven thirty. I didn't think I would make it in time."

"In time for what?" I ask looking up at him. He is so fucking beautiful. He's down to his boxers and his clothes and shoes decorate the carpet. He looks absolutely exhausted, his hair falling over his forehead and dark circles shadowing his eyes. .

"For our anniversary. I didn't think I'd make it before midnight. I've never missed one yet and fuck if this would be the first one."

I begin to cry harder just looking up into his face. "What made you come back? Oh Christian I'm so sorry." Christian puts his finger to my lips to silence me.

"Shh. Don't talk right now." He wipes my tears with his thumb and pulls me into his arms holding me so tightly I think I will break. " We can fuck and talk and drink champagne later. Right now I need to be as close to you as I can be. I just need to hold you. You are my home, Anastasia and I need to come home."


	45. Chapter 45

_**Fifty Shades…Full Circle**_

_**Chapter 45**_

_**A/N: Adult content warning...**_

We lie wrapped in each other's arms for several minutes just drinking in the closeness. I can't believe he is here. I can't believe I'm in his arms again. I could stay in these arms forever. All I can hear is his breathing and all I can feel is his heart beating.

"I'm sorry Anastasia," he whispers against my neck as he brushes my hair aside. "I'm so fucking sorry."

"No, Christian." I turn to face him still in his hold. "No. It's me. I'm sorry. I just didn't understand. I thought I was helping. I thought I had done what was best. I just had no idea how it would affect you. I had no idea how far over the line I had stepped." I trace his jaw with my finger and nuzzle against him. "I love you so much." Tears begin to spill over again.

"Sweetheart, please don't cry." He sweetly brushes his lips against mine. "Your lips are always so soft when you've been crying, but I can't stand for you to cry."

"Thank you for making it back in time."

"I fought like hell to get here. It's taken all day. There were severe storms over the Midwest. Flights were delayed and rerouted. We sat on the tarmac for hours. I finally just told Stephen to fly anywhere, just get us the fuck off the ground. I didn't care if we had to fly fucking east until we got back to Seattle; I just needed to get here today."

"Christian, I never want you to put yourself in any danger. You could have called I would have understood if the weather was keeping you away. All I needed was for you to want to be here."

"Remember, I said nothing could keep me away? And I meant nothing. A little wind and hail couldn't stop me from getting to you." He pulls me tight again and buries his nose in my hair.

"Do you need something to eat? Are you hungry?" I ask.

"Yes, but right now all I want to devour is you. It's almost midnight. We only have a few minutes left and I want to bury myself in you while it's still our anniversary."

As he moves over me I pull him close and wrap my legs around him. Never breaking our gaze I wince a bit as he merges his body with mine. He is inside me. We are as close as we can physically get. "Oh fuck," I hear him exhale against my cheek. "God I've missed you," he whispers.

"I know. I've missed you so much." The tears are still seeping from my eyes as I look up at him and brush his hair from his forehead. "Christian I'm so sor…."

"Shhh. Later. Right now I just need to be here with you. I need to be inside of you and I need you around me." He slowly, gently begins to move in and out. As long as we've been together and as many times as he has entered me, I still need to take a moment to adjust to him. "Are you okay?"

"Yes. You just feel so good." I nod.

"I need to feel you and touch you and taste you and make love to you," he moans. "Fuck I just need you."

I love him so much and it's been so long that I could almost come just at his touch. He continues to undulate against me and the point where our bodies come together seems like the center of the universe. Like the planets and stars are orbiting around us. No one exists right now but us. My hips roll and meet his as we move in unison, my body always rising to meet his; to capture him and pull him back into me. His breath is hot against my skin and his breathing is ragged as he continues to move in and out.

"God, Christian I've missed you so much. I love you."

"I know baby. I know. Never again." I can see the intensity in his eyes as he gazes into mine. "I need to watch you. I need for you to give yourself me?"

"Almost." I hear myself gasp as he begins to increase our pace. As he does, I can feel the pulling and tension. As my body reaches that point of no return I feel it relax and the incredible sensation of clinching and releasing permeates me as my release takes over. "God, Christian." I moan. There is no going back. This promised climax has invaded my body and taken over, not allowing me to escape its grasp. My body is his and it trembles beneath him offering itself up to him once again as I come against him.

"That's it. That's my girl." Christian whispers as he delivers the final thrust that sends him over the edge as well. "Oh fuck." He grimaces as he tries not to break our gaze. I can feel him shudder against my body as his eyes darken and he buries his head against my neck. Spilling into me for what seems ages, he surrenders his control and rides out his release; trembling and gasping until he is spent and falls against me. "Oh Ana, Ana, Ana." I can hear his whisper. He is mine again…and I am his. The universe is once again as it is intended to be.

He raises his head just enough so that the soft pillows that are his lips touch mine and they begin to move across each other as our tongues meet and dance together. Fisting my hands in his hair I pull him close as we invade the caverns of our mouths; searching, exploring, needing. I wrap my legs around his waist and pull him close not allowing him to escape me as he returns to his pre-aroused state and I can hear my giggle as his fading erection twitches asking for release, but I keep firm holding him for as long as I can.

"I think I could eat something now," he smiles down at me.

"Me?" I ask with a big hopeful grin.

"Definitely you, but later. I haven't eaten all day and I'm ravenous."

"I planned Chateaubriand with Chateau potatoes and fresh asparagus with Hollandaise, but had Gail stow it for another time, since you weren't here," I explain.

"Fuck. That sounds good. Chateaubriand is my favorite."

"I know. But I think there is some baked chicken and Mac and Cheese in the fridge."

"Mac and Cheese is my second favorite." He pulls away and I release my hold, gasping as he leaves me empty again. "You go get something to eat, I'll open a bottle of Champagne and we'll celebrate this bitch like we should."

"Well, damn, that was romantic." I smirk at him as I slide off of the bed wrapping Christian's shirt back around me and fastening a couple of buttons to secure it. I pad downstairs and take the cold chicken and Mac and Cheese from the refrigerator. I put the cheesy dish in the microwave to heat it while I cut up the chicken putting it in a large bowl. Getting a bed tray, I place the two bowls of food on it along with two forks and some napkins and head back upstairs to my waiting husband.

When I arrive, Christian has popped the cork and poured two glasses. "What is that?" he asks, nodding to the large photo covered in ripped wrapping paper with a displaced ribbon and bow.

"Oh. That is your anniversary present. I'm sorry. I had too much to drink and unwrapped it earlier." I tell him as I set the tray on the bed and walk over to him.

"Yes, I figured you might have had a bit to drink. When I came in you were asleep with a champagne glass balancing on your stomach. Pretty nifty trick." He puts his arm around me and kisses my forehead, "But then my wife is full of pretty nifty tricks."

"You might as well finish unwrapping it." I tell him.

He walks over to the large portrait and finishes pulling the paper away giving him a full view of the large photo. "Where did you get this?"

"Jose found it in an old camera and asked if I wanted it. I asked him to enlarge it and have it framed to match the others. Do you like it?"

"It's fucking incredible. Look at us. It seems so long ago and then again it feels like yesterday." He pulls me close again as we stare at the moment frozen in time. "I feel like I've been in love with you all of my life and yet every day I feel as though I've just met you."

"It's indescribable, this 'love' thing. I just know I like it and never want to be without it," he tells me.

"I'm glad you like it. The photo and the 'love thing'. Where do you want to hang it?"

"Somewhere where we can see it every day. I want to be reminded that you are mine every day of my life."

"How about in here? We can hang it over the fireplace. That way we can see it every day, unless we aren't here. Then you'll just have to look at me."

"Believe me, I intend to look at you every day anyway. And I intend to see you, not just look at you."

"Let's eat before you make me cry again."

We slide onto the bed and sit cross-legged as we look at each other and eat from the bowls.

"God I love Gail's macaroni and cheese," Christian mumbles through the food in his mouth.

"I know. She does make the best. Can you hand me my champagne?" I ask.

He passes me my glass. "Wait." He raises his glass. " To us on our anniversary. Always together and always in love. And always horny. Happy anniversary, Mrs. Grey," he grins.

"I'll drink to that. Happy anniversary, Mr. Grey." After we take a sip he leans over and cupping my head in his hand he kisses me long and deep and wet.

We resume consuming our makeshift anniversary dinner. "Christian, what made you come back?"

"What do you mean? I love you. I'll always be here."

"No. I know. I mean you were so angry. What changed your mind?"

"Well, I didn't really change my mind. This still should have been my decision, but it seems that I have three pretty incredible women in my life."

"Me, your mother and Grace?" I ask as I pull the meat from a chicken leg.

"You always first. And I guess since my daughter is pretty incredible, there are four."

"Who are the other two?"

"My mother ….and my grandmother."

"Your grandmother?" I ask in disbelief.

He nods. "Christian have you spoken with her?" I ask.

"Yes," he slowly nods. "I have."

"What happened? Tell me?" I ask. "I mean, if you want to."

"Of course I want to. Okay, on Monday I left for work early."

"Yes I noticed. Almost before dawn."

"I left early to meet my Mother for breakfast. I was so hurt and angry. I was unraveling and I knew it. I explained what had happened and she listened. She told me what I already knew. That you only did it because you cared so much for me and were trying to do what you thought was best for me. She told me to take the information and do what my heart told me to do. She said that she would support any decision that I made. And that I would always be her son, no matter what came of this." He pulls a bit of cold chicken from the bowl and picks at it as he talks. "I needed her blessing. I couldn't bear it if I ever hurt her. I needed to hear her say it was okay to pursue this." He looks at me. "Ana she is my mother. She saved me. She loved me. She sacrificed for me and never turned her back on me no matter how much I tried to push her away.

"Back then feelings of any type, much less love, were painful. I did everything I could to try not to feel anything, even though I wanted it so desperately. Deep down I loved Mom and Dad and Mia and Elliott so much, but I was just so afraid of it. I had loved my Mom and she had turned her back on me. I was so afraid that it would happen again. That they would all find out who I really was and hate me for it.

"I think that's why I ended up with Elena. She knew all about me and what I had been through and when I was a young boy she started showing me attention. Attention that I mistook for affection. She made me feel as though feeling something was okay….that is until we started….you know all that shit. Then feelings flew out the window. Then it became about emotionless, empty sex and control. Once again I had to stow it all away, push those feelings way down inside because I felt that I didn't deserve it. I was only good enough for someone to abuse and hurt. I was nothing; less than a whole human being and I only deserved what I was getting.

Fuck my heart is breaking. I can't stand that he ever felt this way about himself. Even though it is difficult to hear, I know he needs to talk and I need to let him do it.

"It wasn't until I met you that I was able to see that I needed love and I needed to give it to someone. You made me feel like just maybe I wasn't garbage. That maybe I was worth something. You changed my life. Grace saved me first and you saved me the second time. "

"Sweetheart. You didn't need to be saved. You just needed to be able to trust someone. Once you did that, giving and receiving love just came naturally. Christian you have such a good heart. Teddy told me that the other day."

"Teddy? He thinks I have a good heart?" he almost looks surprised.

"Yes, and he loves you without question. So does Grace. So do I. We are your family and we will always be here. What did you do after you talked to Grace?"

"Well. I had to go to Pittsburg. I really did have to be there. We wrapped up late Wednesday and then I flew to Chicago Thursday afternoon. I decided to meet with Virginia Thursday evening for dinner. We ate at her home and I let her explain everything to me. It wasn't easy hearing all of that. I had always thought of myself as the product of where I came from. She changed all of that; my perception of who I am."

"Christian, you are the person you made yourself to be. You aren't just the product of a gene pool."

He nods. "Yes. Logically I know that. But in my gut I've always been the product of a relationship that was unnatural and disgusting and was conceived in a moment of terror and hatred."

My heart is breaking and I want to cry for him. And I can't help the tears that spill out of my eyes.

"Oh, baby don't cry." He reaches over and wipes my cheek.

"I can't help it. I love you so much and I don't want you to ever feel like that. Christian I want so badly for you to fucking love yourself. I want you to see yourself the way I do. The way Teddy and Grace and the rest of your family do. You are just so damned incredible, Christian Grey, and I want you to believe that." Using the sleeve of Christian's shirt I wipe my tears away and wipe my nose.

"Hey. That's my shirt," he warns me.

"I'll buy you another one." I snicker. "I just wanted to try to change that for you."

"And you did. As angry as I was, I needed to hear what Virginia had to say. I needed to know about my mother, and not just the name on a birth certificate. I needed to hear about who she was and who she loved and who loved her. I needed to know who my father really was. I know how I feel about you and what we felt when our children were conceived. I needed to know that I was conceived the same way. And that my parents felt about each other the way we feel."

"Virginia told you all of that?"

He nods. "Yes. And Ana I learned so much." He adjusts himself leaning forward. "Did you know that my mother was a cheerleader?" he says with a smile on his face.

"No I didn't know that." I can't help but return his smile through my tears.

"Well she was. She was really popular in school and according to the signatures in her yearbook, everybody liked her."

"Really?"

"Yes. And she was adopted, just like me. Virginia saved her, just like Grace saved me." He has the sweetest smile on his face and a glow just telling me about her.

He gets up and unzips his duffle bag and returns with some books. Then he opens his mother's high school yearbook and flips through the pages. "Here. Look." I crawl over next to him and he shares the book with me. "That's her. Right there."

"She's so pretty Christian."

"Yes. She is. She looks happy. I had never seen her happy until I saw these." He glides his fingers across her picture on the page as if he were touching her, "I'm glad she was happy." He grabs another of the books and opens it. It's a photo album. "And look here. That's my Dad. We look alike, don't we?" he asks.

"Christian, you look just like him, Sweetheart." I want to cry seeing him so enthusiastic.

"You know, being adopted, I loved it when Teddy turned out to look so much like me. It was sort of a genetic connection. It's like that with my father. Ana I look like someone. I'm connected to someone. I came from somewhere and from someone."

My heart wants to burst as Christian continues to tell me about his parents and we look through all the pictures. He looks like a kid on Christmas morning. His eyes are wide with excitement and I've never heard him talk this much. Ever.

"And my grandmother, Virginia. Ana, she's a really nice person and she loves me. At least she said she did."

"Christian I have no doubt but that she loves you."

"She tried to find me. She really did try to find my mother and me. And the thing I'm most grateful for is that when she did find me, she let me stay with Mom and Dad. Ana she loved me enough to give me up. She just wanted to make sure I was being cared for and loved. And Ana, she sent me back to you. She convinced me how much love it took for you to try to do this for me; to risk what we have to try to make me feel better. Even though I already knew it, she made me see that I wanted to come home. She really thinks a lot of you."

"Christian, do you know how lucky you are to have two families who love you?" I ask.

"Three."

"Three?" I ask, confused by his response.

"Yes. Virginia, Ella and Thomas. Then Grace, Carrick , Mia and Elliott. And Teddy, Grace and Ana. Especially Ana." He leans over and kisses me tilting my head up with his fingers under my chin.

"Yes. Especially Ana." I repeat and smile up at him.

"Hey did you know my dad, tried to find us? He really did, but Mom didn't want to be found I guess. He died in a car accident on his way to college."

"Yes, sweetheart. I remember that."

We spend hours sitting on the bed looking at photos and old pictures of his family. He tells me about Virginia and where she lives and what her house looked like. She even took him by the house where his father was raised, though they didn't go in or try to contact his father's family. Since they never knew about him, he wants to wait and decide if he would like to include them in his new family.

Smiling over at me, he suddenly remembers something. "Wait. I forgot something." He goes to his dresser and returns with a small box wrapped with a bow. "Here. I got so carried away, that I forgot to give this to you. Happy anniversary, Mrs. Grey."

I take the box and carefully unwrap it and take the top off. Gasping, "Oh, Christian it's beautiful." I pull the chain out of the box and admire it. It is delicate chain, made of gold with our entwined initials covered in small diamonds on it. The initials are just like the ones on the cufflinks I gave him. "Christian, what is it ? It's too long for a bracelet and too short for a necklace."

"It's an anklet. I had it made when you lost your engagement ring and you said you didn't want another one. I needed something for you to wear to say you are mine. I remembered you bought one in silver on our honeymoon that day you went to town without me." He grins at me. "I liked it, but you stopped wearing it."

"Yes. The metal was soft and it didn't take it long to break. I still have it, but it's in my jewelry box." I keep looking at it and can't find a clasp. "Christian? How do you put this on? I can't figure it out."

"Give it to me. Now sit back and give me your ankle." I do as I am told placing my bare ankle in his lap. He looks through the box I thought was empty and pulls out a Barbie sized instrument.

"There it is. It turns out to be a tiny screwdriver. He then removes a minuscule screw from the end of the anklet. Placing it on my ankle, he puts the ends together and uses the screw to hold them in place securing it with the screwdriver. After it is attached to me he takes the screwdriver and locks it away in his dresser.

Returning to the bed he takes my ankle and softly kisses it sliding his hand up and down stroking my inner leg. "Now you are mine and anyone who sees this will know it."

"Christian, everybody already knows I'm yours and if they don't, I have no problem telling them." I assure him. "But it is absolutely beautiful. Thank you."

"It's sexy. I like it on you." He continues to glide his hands up and down my leg going farther up with each long stroke until he glides his fingers across the wet area between my thighs. "Always so…"

I stop him. "I know. Always so ready for you." I crawl over to him and cupping his face in my hands I kiss him. " Always wanting you." I kiss him again. "Always needing you." Our lips meet once more, "Always loving you." This time he takes me in his arms and pulling me to him we fall on to the bed. His head nuzzles my chest as he takes my breast and suckles me. I gasp as the delicious sensation ripples through me and watch his tongue as it circles and swirls and his mouth tugs and pulls. Just watching him take me is driving me senseless. The sight of his tongue as it moves against my skin is so erotic and my nipples respond, becoming tight and erect.

"I'm in fucking love with your breasts," he mumbles as he continues to devour me moving from one breast to the other and back again. "If I could marry each one individually, I would and live very happily ever after."

"God you're crazy sometimes." I gasp and giggle as he nips me." But I love you."

His soft, warm lips trail over my skin and down my tummy, only stopping to pay homage to my navel. His hands still cling to my breasts as he wanders my body with his mouth; each kiss a small testament of his love and need for me. God how I respond to him. How I crave him. How my body needs him. I can feel my breathing becoming more rapid and shallow as he continues down, and I want to come off the bed as he finally rests his mouth on the flesh that is nestled between my upper thighs. My body responds to him as my back arches forcing me against him. "Oh, fuck. Christian."

"You taste like heaven," he murmurs as he continues to drive me to a fever pitch. My senses have shut down and all I know is the incredible sensation between my thighs. The point where he is touching me, kissing me, driving me to the edge. I can feel my tummy quiver and my legs tremble as he devours me. Fisting my hands in those copper locks I look down and watch as he concentrates his efforts between my thighs. "Oh, God, don't stop. Please." I can feel his hands on me as he pushes them wider and he presses his mouth harder against me. Oh fuck, I don't think I can do much more. "Oh, Christian," I gasp as my body falls over the edge and is caught by the shuddering release that rips through me. It feels as though my entire body is being consumed by the exquisite phenomenon he has produced in me. I don't know who invented this, but I love them. I'll try to remember to send them a thank you note.

Christian holds me firmly in his grasp as my body trembles out the last spasms of its release against him. "I need you." I whisper down to him. He moves up and takes my mouth with his; sharing the remnants of my arousal that linger on his lips. "I need you." I whisper against his mouth. "I need you. I need you."

Hovering above me, he rubs himself against the wet flesh he has just brought to climax. His hips roll as he moves up and down until suddenly he is past my threshold. "Fuck," he growls against my cheek. "How can you still be so fucking tight?"

"C- sections." I snort half laughing and half gasping.

I can feel his belly quiver against mine as he briefly chuckles. "Thank God for modern medicine." His breathing is ragged and raw as he begins to slide in and out picking up his pace as he pushes toward his goal. He sits up on his knees and grabbing my thighs he lifts my bottom off of the mattress continuing his drive. Looking up at him, I watch his muscles ripple and his body glisten with sweat. He smiles at me as he watches me respond beneath him.

"You're so fucking beautiful, Baby. Let me see you," he gasps. I can feel myself nearing the edge for him. One more push deep inside and I'm giving myself to him again; surrendering my body to him. Oh my God I'm his. I've belonged to him since the first time I laid eyes on him. I'll always belong to him.

As my body gives him the last tremor that it has, I watch him as his body begins its surrender. A mask of pleasure clouds his face as he trembles and shudders above me. I love watching what this does to him. I love watching him surrender to me. I just love watching him come. "Aw, shit. Fuck me," he growls as he falls on me totally spent. Our chests heave against each other as we try to catch our breath on our return to earth and our bodies easily slide across one another on their vail of perspiration. Christian nuzzles my neck as he lies on top of me totally spent and exhausted. Totally mine.

"Sweetheart?" I gasp. "Baby, I can't breathe. You're too heavy."

He lifts off and rolls beside me still holding me in his arms. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to hurt you."

"You didn't. I just couldn't get a breathe."

"You've lost weight," he observes as his hands travel my body.

"Just a little. I'll put it back on, now that you're home."

"Damn right you will. I'll make sure of it. You're mine and I take care of what is mine."

"Yes, Christian. I'm yours."


	46. Chapter 46

_**Fifty Shades…Full Circle**_

_**Chapter 46**_

_**A/N: I had a request for some family time after the anniversary debacle. Here it is with a little spice thrown in for good measure.**_

* * *

Christian and I have talked and made love and looked at pictures and fucked and drank champagne and the sun will soon be up.

Lying wrapped in his arms with my head on his chest, I'm totally satisfied and happy. "Christian?"

"What baby."

"I can't remember an anniversary I've enjoyed more than this one."

"Not even last year and getting the Heathman?" he asks.

"No. I'd rather have this anklet and the time we've spent together this morning than all the Heathmans in the world."

"You really don't ask for a lot do you?" he kisses the top of my head. "Anastasia, I want you to have the world and I can give it to you. I want to give it to you. I always have."

"I have all I need right here. If I want anything else, I'll let you know."

"You do know you'll never have to worry about anything. You'll always be taken care of. You'll always have anything you want."

"Christian, I'll always be able to take care of myself. I was taking care of myself when we met and I think I can do it again." I try to convince him, "What I can't do is live without you. I don't know how to do that."

"I don't know how to live without you either."

Looking up at him and smiling, "I thought you said you were surviving before you met me and you could do it again?"

"I was. And I can. But I don't want to just have to survive ever again. My heart may take another beat without you and my lungs may fill with air without you; but I could never really live without you. I need to love you to live. I couldn't bear it if I ever lost you or the kids."

"Well I don't know about you, but I'm not going anywhere. I intend to stay planted in this mansion of a house with you until I'm on my last leg." I look up at him and grab my champagne glass, which is empty now, and make a toast. "Will you grow old and gray with me, Mr. Grey?"

"It will be my pleasure, Mrs. Grey." We clink our empty glasses and I return to my spot on his chest.

"Speaking of having all we need, where are our children?" he asks.

"They are spending the night with Gail as per our anniversary plans. We probably should get them soon. I imagine Mr. and Mrs. Taylor have missed each other as much as we have and have just as much to catch up on as we do."

Christian chuckles, "Yes, I imagine that they do. Taylor was getting a bit on the irritable side towards the end of the week. I don't know what Gail's got, but Taylor certainly does appreciate it."

"Isn't it funny how that worked out? I never imagined them together when I first met them. Life's funny."

"Fucking hysterical." He snorts. "Ana?"

"Yes, sweetheart?"

"Ana, I'd like for Virginia to visit. I'd like her to see the house and Grey House and meet the kids and my parents. What would you think of that?"

"I think if that's what you want, then it's an excellent idea. We need to come up with some way to explain to the kids who she is. Just trying to explain that Mom and Ray are divorced and Mom is now married to Bob, about blew poor Teddy's mind. He doesn't really understand about adoption and he sure doesn't know that you were adopted."

"Well I guess we could just say that she is a relative of mine. They don't have to know the whole story right now do they?"

"No. Probably not. I guess we just need to keep it simple and direct. Does Virginia want to come for a visit?"

"I think she'd like to. She has been following us and I think she'd like to spend some time with us and get to know us better. She really doesn't have anyone else. She's got plenty of damn money, but no one in her life, and I certainly know what the fuck that is like."

"If that's what you want, then that's what we'll do. Just let me know when."

"I suppose we should get up and get ready for the off spring to return. Chalk up another anniversary." He looks down at me, "Ready to get up and face the world?"

"Almost." I sit up and face him. Then kissing him I move and straddle his lap, circling his neck with my arms; my lips never leaving his. "I think I need you one more time before I face the word."

He puts his arms around me and pulls me close to him, whispering against my mouth, "Oh, Mrs. Grey. We do aim to please."

* * *

"Good morning Mrs. Taylor. I hate to interrupt you, but are you ready rid yourself of two children and a dog so you can spend some quality time with Mr. Grey's Chief of Personal Security?"

"Well aren't you chipper this morning?"

"Yes Mrs. Taylor, I am. Thank you."

"I take it the anniversary went well?"

"Yes. It went very well indeed." I have to giggle. "How are my children? Did they make you pull your hair out?"

"Good heavens no. They were angels as always."

"Okay, now I know you're lying. Can you bring them back? Their father missed them and would like to see them."

"Sure thing. They're just finishing breakfast. I'll get them dressed and back to you in about a half of an hour."

"Sounds great. And Gail, thank you. We really needed this time." I tell her.

"No problem. I told you it would all work out. See you shortly."

Looking over at Christian, "The little people who look like you will be back in about a half an hour."

He rolls over on me and kisses me, "Well that gives us time I guess."

I push him away, "Oh no. We need to get a shower and get dressed." I whisper, "We smell like sex."

"Well I can't imagine why. By the way, it's my favorite scent on you."

"Why, thank you. It's specially made and I try to wear it often." I tease.

He swats me on the butt, "Let's get up before I have to fuck that smart mouth right off of you."

Quickly getting showered and dressed we get down stairs just in time to see our kids walking across the neatly manicured lawn. Christian can't wait and he walks outside to watch them. The first to spot him is Jack who comes barking and running across the grass . When he reaches Christian he lunges up at him and Christian bends down, picking him up. "Hey, Bud? How ya' been?" Christian buffs his head and Jack is just hysterical, licking Christian's face and whining like it's his long lost mother. Christian laughs and is obviously delighted with the attention. "Whoa. Hang on there, bud. It's okay. Calm down."

Teddy and Grace notice that their dad is home and take off running to him.

Gail stops and waves. "Thanks." I yell to her. "See you tomorrow."

Christian bends down to hug his kids as they make it back from the Taylor's quarters. As I watch them tackle him, I think about what he said about having someone who looks like him. It never even crossed my mind that would be important. I guess it is important to feel connected to someone. I have to smile as I watch him with his kids. He hugs Teddy and gives him little swat on his butt. Then he cups Grace's face in his hands and plants kisses all over her little face while she squeals and laughs.

He picks up Grace and puts his arm around Teddy's shoulder as they walk toward the house. I think my heart will burst. I couldn't have imagined this eight years ago. Back then it was all about Christian and me and sex and being in love and sex and working through his issues and sex. I don't think I ever imagined we would actually end up like this. As they reach the house Christian hands Grace to me and I give her a squeeze and a big kiss. "How's my girl. Did you miss me?"

She gives me a nod as I pull her finger out of her mouth. "Dada home Mama."

"Yes he is. Aren't we happy?" I tell her.

She looks at her dad, "Dada, Mama thad you not here. Her cwied."

"She did?" he asks.

Grace twirls her hair with one hand and puts her finger back in her mouth as she nods," She mithed you, Dada."

Christian looks devastated that his daughter has brought that to his attention. "Well, we can't have Mommy being sad anymore." He leans over and kisses me.

"I'll go put some coffee on. Sweetheart do you want any breakfast?" I ask him.

"I could eat something."

"Something like…..? Give me a hint." I ask.

"Oh, something light. Just some toast and fruit."

"Okay." I lower Grace to the ground.

"Maybe an omelet and some hash browns."

"Omelet and hash browns. Okay."

"Oh, could you maybe make some bacon? Don't go to any trouble. Just a couple of pieces."

"Christian," I have to chuckle, "it doesn't matter how many pieces. It's the same amount of trouble. So toast, fruit an omelet, hash browns and bacon."

"Yeah. That should be fine." He flashes me that Christian smile and I'd do anything for him. Teddy is hanging off of his arm and generally being a pest.

I turn to walk to the kitchen and stop, "Oh, Christian. Call your mother. I think Grace was concerned about you. She'll be glad to know you're home."

He gives me a perplexed look, "Really? Okay. I'll give her a call after a while."

"Oh and Mia told them about the baby. Act surprised, okay?"

"Got it." Teddy is still trying to climb him like a tree. "Teddy. Son, you're going to break my arm."

"He needs some attention." I mouth to him.

Christian nods that he understands and picks him up like a sack of potatoes and they head to the family room. Meantime I start to fix his 'don't go to any trouble' breakfast. Jack is glued to the kitchen floor staring a hole through me.

* * *

"CHRISTIAN." I yell into the family room.

"WHAT?" he yells back.

"BREAKFAST."

"OKAY. COMING."

I finally see the figure of my husband walking into the kitchen with Teddy over his shoulder. Out of the corner of my eye I see Teddy snatch a piece of bacon from the plate on the counter and sneak it to Christian who quickly shoves it in his mouth. I glare at him.

"What?" he actually has said it with a straight face.

"I'm not blind. You ought to be ashamed to involve you son in your duplicitous scheme."

Teddy giggles as he sneaks another piece and shoves it in his mouth. Christian sets him down on the floor as he chomps on his bacon.

"See what you started? You've turned your son into a bacon thief." I reach over and squeeze Teddy's little cheeks.

"He could do worse." He leans over and kisses my cheek. "Come on son, let's get a plate and get started. I take up the omelet and turn it out on a plate and hand it to him.

"Teddy are you eating again?" I ask.

"If Dad's eatin', I'm eatin'." He grins up at Christian.

"That's right." Christian agrees.

I roll my eyes at them both. "Okay. Sit down. Teddy I thought you ate at Gail's. What do you want?"

He looks over at Christian's plate. "I'll have a omblit."

"What? Teddy you don't like omelets." I try to tell him.

"Yes I do. I like them."

"Okay. What do you want in your _omblit_?" I ask.

I can see he is at a loss. "Umm. Bacon."

"Bacon? Why don't you just have scrambled eggs with bacon?"

"Huh uh. I want what Dad has."

"Teddy you won't like it," Christian tries to tell him. "It has onions and mushrooms and peppers in it. You don't eat any of those."

"Yes I do. I eat them," he argues.

"Okay. Okay. I'll fix one like Daddy has." I tell him as I take a sip of tea and construct this omelet.

"Where's Grace." I ask.

"Shit. We left her in the family room." Christian says shoving a piece of toast in his mouth. "I'll go get her." He returns carrying Grace and puts her on a stool at the breakfast bar.

"Christian, she'll fall off of that." I admonish him.

He gets up and picks Grace up and the sets her in his lap. Before he goes back to eating, he nuzzles her neck and makes kissing noises while she screeches with delight. "I'm never going to get to finish my breakfast," he complains.

I turn the omelet out on a plate and put it in front of Teddy. "Here you go baby. Eat up. Anybody want orange juice?"

I get three yeses. So I pour four juices. "Teddy what's wrong?" I ask as I see him make a face and stick his fingers in his mouth pulling out pieces of peppers, mushrooms and onions. "Ugghh." He frowns and spits it out on his plate. "Not good."

"How about some fruit?" I sneer at him.

He nods to me.

After I get his fruit, I sit down next to Christian and take Teddy's omelet and grab some toast to go with it.

"You gonna' eat that?" Christian asks.

"Yes. I'm hungry. No need to waste it."

"But he spit it out." Christian looks completely grossed out.

"I won't eat the part he spit out. I'm used to eating after them." I tell him. "I don't feel like cooking another one."

"Baby don't eat that. Here have part of mine," he offers.

"What's the difference in eating after you and eating after him?" I ask.

He shrugs, "Okay."

"Have you called your Mom yet?" I ask.

"Yep. I acted surprised."

"Good."

"She said to remind you we have that thing next weekend."

I sigh, "Crap. What thing?"

"That cocktail party at their house. It's Saturday night."

"I forgot. Do we have to go?"

"Yes we have to go. It's for the hospital." He wipes his mouth and kisses me quickly. "Go buy a new dress."

"I don't want a new dress. But I guess I'll go get one," I grumble back.

"Me too, Mama. I want new dwess too." Grace chimes in."Doddy I get new dwess. Pweese?"

Christian gasps. "Grace. You said Daddy. You called me Daddy." Christian has a huge grin on his face. "Did you hear that? She finally said daddy. No Dada or Da, but daddy." He kisses her, "Carla Grace you're brilliant. You're Daddy's smart girl."

She nods, "Okay. I get new dwess?"

He kisses her, "Of course you can have a new dress baby."

"Christian she doesn't need a new dress." I tell him.

"You don't have to need one to get one. At least there is one woman in this house that knows how to spend my money."

"You'll regret saying that one day, Daddy." I remind him with a big grin.

* * *

Flopping on the sofa, I move in next to my husband. "Damn, I'll be glad to get this cast off my wrist."

"How's it feeling?" he asks as I force my way under his arm.

"Okay, I guess. It itches and it's dirty and just a nuisance in general. I go see the doctor Tuesday. I'm hoping he'll take it off and put one of those lighter brace things on it. He said if it's healing well, he could do that."

"I hope so too. I know it's been a pain." He pulls me to his side and I lean in against him.

"It's hard to think about getting a new dress when I have to wear this thing. "

"Well, put a glove over it or a bracelet on it."

"A glove?" I glare at him, "What kind of glove? I'm not going to a ball or the opera, a glove with a cocktail dress would look worse than the cast." I snort.

Teddy jumps up and runs over and pushes his way in to sit between Christian and me, totally displacing me. He's wedged in between us so firmly he can hardly breathe. "Comfortable there son?" Christian asks him. Teddy grins and nods. "Yep. Dad?"

"Huh?" Christian is busy alternately perusing the Sunday paper and looking at his phone.

"Dad?" Teddy asks again.

"What?" Christian looks down at him.

"I'm glad you're back."

"Thank you. I'm glad I'm back too."

"Dad?"

"Yes?" Christian has returned to his paper.

"Dad?"

"Teddy, what is it?" Christian asks almost losing his patience.

"Where did you go?"

"I went to Pittsburg on business."

"Oh. Dad? Why did you have to go to P- Pissburg?"

Christian chuckles," PiTTsburg. I had business to take care of. I had to meet with some people."

"Dad?"

Christian drops his paper and grabs Teddy pulling him in his lap. Teddy giggles as his dad wraps his arms around him securing him. "Yes, Theodore, what is it?"

Teddy grins as he melts in his Dad's lap, "Nuffin."

"Are you sure?" Christian asks. "You have my full attention. No more questions?"

"Nope."

"Positive?"

"Well. Um. Can we go in the glider again?"

"Hmmm. Well …."

I cut my eyes over and glare at him. "Teddy you know how I feel about you going up in the glider."

"But Mo-om."

"It's too dangerous. I really don't want you to." I tell him.

"But dad flies it really good. He won't crash."

I shudder when he says crash. "No. No it's just too dangerous."

"But Dad goes. You don't care if he crashes."

"Teddy. I absolutely care if Daddy cr….has an accident. But he's old enough to make his own decisions."

"Sorry Sport. Mom says no." Christian says. "Maybe when you get a little older, she'll change her mind."

"Geez. I can't ever have any fun."

"How about we find something else to do together, Bud."

"Can we go on the boat?" he asks.

"I don't see why not." He looks over at me, "Is the boat okay, Mom?"

"Yes." I smirk at them.

"Speaking of the glider, Grace either needs another haircut or we need to let it grow out. I'm consulting you on it, Mr. Grey, as requested."

"You know what I want."

"As I recall, you offered to wash it for a week. I don't seem to recall that happening."

"I had work. I was busy." He grins over at me. "But I'll do it this time. Let it grow."

"Well you can start tonight. Good luck."

"Good heavens. She's a three year old little girl. I'm six feet tall, 180 pounds and I work out. How hard can it be?"

"My money's on the three year old." I tell him snuggling back up against him and yawning. "I need a nap. I stayed up too late last night."

He pulls me closer and wraps his arm around me while I rest my head on his chest. "Here you go baby. Close your eyes for a while."

"Mmm. This is heaven." The rhythmic rise and fall of his chest is so soothing I can feel myself nodding off.

* * *

My eyelids flutter and I open them feeling warm, sweet breath on my face. When I can focus, all I see is two blue eyes and a mass of chestnut curls.

"Mama, ar you aseep?" Grace loudly whispers. When my brain finally registers where I am, and who I am, I hear Christian snoring. He has fallen asleep with my head in his lap. His head has fallen back and he sounds like a buzz saw. "What is it baby?" I croak.

"Ar you aseep?" she yell whispers again.

"No. Not anymore. Do you need something?"

"Doddy makin' a bad noise."

"I know, sweetie. I think he's fallen asleep."

"No I haven't." I hear as he lifts his head. "I was just resting." He croaks.

Grace takes this as an invitation and propels herself into his lap.

"AAAgggghhh."I can see pain on Christian's face. "Grace. Be careful." He groans as he moves her off of his testicles.

I can't help but giggle. "Perhaps, you should go get out of those pajama bottoms and put on something a little more substantial."

"No. No really I love a good knee in the nuts every now and then." He grimaces. "Ahhhsht." He grimaces again as she continues to make herself comfortable in his lap.

"Think I'll get a fresh cup of tea. Do you want some hot coffee?" I ask as I stand up and stretch and grab my cup.

"I'd love one. Thanks."

Getting to the kitchen I put on the kettle to heat my water while making a fresh pot for Christian. Leaning on the counter, my mind wanders and I can't help but think about last night and how excited he seemed to be with his newfound family. He looked like a little boy, so anxious to tell me all about it. Lost in my thoughts, I hardly jump when I feel hands on my butt.

"What are you doing?" I hear Christian whisper.

"Letting my husband play with my ass." I stand up and lean back against him. As I do, his hands reach around me and as he pulls me to him he rubs between my thighs. His erection is firm as he moves it against my ass. "Oh, Christian. Always so ready for me." I can't help but giggle. "Careful cowboy, I thought you were injured."

"I've recovered," he murmurs against my neck and nips my earlobe.

"So I see." He pops the button and pulls my zipper down and then I can feel his fingers as they invade the space under my satin panties. I groan as his fingers slip into the moisture and glide back and forth and his other hand rests on my abdomen pulling me to him.

"Baby, We can't the kids are in the next room." I try to resist, but just barely.

"Then I guess you'll have to be very quiet." He whispers as he continues the dance with his fingers.

I whimper against him, "Really, we can't do this." I try to beg.

"Ssshhh. Just hold still."

"Oh fuck, Christian." I whimper.

"I know. Be a good girl." He continues to stroke and circle me and I can feel the slick moisture as it pours from me onto his fingers.

I'm almost there. My head is swimming and my groin is raw and needy as I lean into him. "Shit." I whisper through gritted teeth.

"Dad, are you coming back?" I hear Teddy's little voice as he walks in the kitchen behind us.

Christian quickly removes his hand and gives me a quick kiss on my cheek, leaving me on the edge and miserable, but presentable. I quickly pull my shirt down to cover the opening in my jeans and resume making my tea.

He turns around to face Teddy, "I'm just giving mom a hand with the coffee. I'll be back in in a minute."

"Okay. You promise?"

"Yes, buddy. You go back in the family room and Mom and I will be in a minute."

"Okay," he pads out of the kitchen. "But don't take all day."

"Shit Christian, we almost got caught." I scold him.

"But we didn't. I'll owe you one later," he flashes a wicked grin in my direction and pops me on my bottom.

" You're just gonna' leave me like this?" I ask standing there with my jeans gaping open.

"Teddy told me not to be too long," he says as he flashes a grin and zips my fly. He gives me a quick kiss as he squeezes my ass. " I'll take care of it later."

"You damn well better, you started it. Here." I hand him a fresh cup of coffee. "Now get out of my kitchen."

* * *

It's been a quiet lazy Sunday at 'Grey Manor'. We have finished dinner and it's getting toward time to get the kids down. Christian has been so relaxed and has really paid attention to the kids today, not that he usually doesn't, he has just been a little more diligent today. "I'm getting sleepy. Are you ready to get the kids to bed?" I ask him.

"Yep. I guess it's about time."

"Remember Grace's hair. You promised."

"Yeah, I know."

"Okay. Ten minute warning. Teddy, Grace. Let's be wrapping it up. Almost time for bed." I announce.

"Aww. Mom it's summer vacation. Can't we stay up?" Teddy whines.

"Your Dad and I have to work tomorrow. We need to get some rest. That means you have to go to bed."

"No fair," he pouts.

"We didn't say it was fair. We said it was time for bed." Christian backs me up. "You can spend your time whining or finish watching your program."

"I like your management style, Mr. Grey." I lean in for a quick kiss.

"'I'll go get the water run in Grace's tub." He says as he lifts off the sofa.

In a few minutes he is back and he walks over and turns the TV off much to Teddy's displeasure.

"Come on Teddster, I'll get you tucked in." I reach down for his hand and Christian pulls Grace up in his arms to take them upstairs.

"Do I have to take a bath tonight?" he asks me as we get up to his room.

"Well, let me smell." I bend down and give him a sniff. "You smell pretty good. Do you feel dirty?"

"Nope. Gail gave me a bath last night."

"Well I guess we can let you slide tonight. Go brush your teeth while I get your jammas out."

I pull a pair of cotton pajamas out with cowboys all over them and lay them out for him then turn his spread down.

"All finished? Let me smell." I tell him.

As I bend down he breaths into my face and I smell his minty breath. "Mmm. Minty fresh. Okay, give me a big grin."

He grins and I inspect his little teeth. "Okay lookin' good. Let's get your PJs on." I hold up his little top and help him in to it; buttoning him up.

"Mom, will I get big like dad?" he asks.

"Well I think so. Your dad is pretty tall, so I think there's a good chance you'll get as tall as he is."

"Nooo. I mean here," He points to his little boy parts.

"Oh….. You mean your penis."

"Yeah. My _pendis_."

"Well. I think you will. As your body gets bigger, everything else will grow too," I explain. "Like when you lost your front tooth, a bigger one grew back in its place."

He looks horrified. " You mean it will fall off and a bigger one will grow back?"

"No. No baby. Your teeth are the only thing that will fall out." I realize my analogy wasn't the best. "As your body gets taller and bigger, everything else grows proportionately. Your nose and your ears and your fingers will all grow to match how tall you are. So does your penis."

"Oh."

"Here step into your bottoms." I help him pull up his PJ bottoms.

"Will it get all that weird hair and stuff like dad's?" he scowls at me.

"Umm. If things go as planned….probably." I try to explain.

"I don't like that. I only like hair on my head."

"Well, sweetie, by the time all that starts to happen, you'll be glad about it."

"No I won't. I like it just like this."

"I think you need to ask your dad about it. He was a little boy once too and he can tell you all about how it happens."

"Does dad like his penis big?"

"Yes, Teddy. I think he likes it big."

"AAAAHHHHHHH! NO! DODDY, NO!" I hear coming from down the hall. I can't help but break into a smile.

"NO DADA. NO. PWEESE. NO WASH."

"What's wrong with Grace?" Teddy asks.

"Oh, your dad's just showing her who is in charge."

He hops in bed and I pull up his covers as I sit next to him.

"Grace doesn't like her hair washed." Teddy lets me know.

"No she doesn't, but your dad will take care of it." I bend over and kiss his head as I run my hand through his hair. "Teddy, don't be afraid of growing up. Just try not to do it too fast, okay?"

"Okay, Mom."

I kiss him again and turn off his light. "I'll have your dad come say good night when he gets finished with Grace."

"Good night, baby."

"'Nite, mom."


	47. Chapter 47

_**Fifty Shades…Full Circle**_

_**Chapter 47 **_

* * *

"What in the world happened to you?" I ask as Christian comes in looking like a drowned rat.

"Nothing. I think the hair washing went quite well," he says as he dries his hair with a towel.

"Don't bother with the towel. I'm running us a tub," I tell him as I wrap my arms around his waist.

"Good. I could use a hot bath. Remind me why we decided to have kids." He says as he tosses the towel on the bathroom vanity and gets undressed.

"It was never really a decision we made as I recall. They were sort of thrust upon us." I smile up at him.

"That's right. Now I remember. Insert penis, cook for nine months and voilà, trouble on two legs."

"That's right. So you see, it's all your fault. I smirk up at him. "Speaking of penises…"

"I didn't know we were, but since you brought it up, I think I owe you one." He lifts me up with his arms around my waist.

"Christian the water is running in the tub." I tell him with a giggle.

"I'll turn it off. Let's get good n' dirty before we take a bath," he growls against my neck.

"You have a one track mind."

"Not really. I'm just able to stay focused," he grins as he puts me down and turns the water in the tub off. "It helps me in business….and fucking."

As he turns back to me he is at full staff and he is grasping it in his hand, stroking as he walks toward me. My eyes dart back and forth between his exceptional manhood and his eyes. "And just what am I supposed to do with that?" I ask as I watch him amble toward me.

"Be creative. I leave it up to you." He says as he reaches me and leans down to kiss me. "I'm yours to do with as you wish."

"Oh, ladies choice is it?" I murmur against his mouth.

"Uh huh." He whispers. "Wanna' play?" he asks as we talk against each other's lips and lock our eyes.

"I'm up for a good game. What 'cha got in mind?" I ask.

"I said ladies choice." He kisses me again.

"Okay. I've seen the on line videos. How….about …. I make a clothes pin zipper and attach it to those balls?" I ask while massaging his balls.

"Mmmmm. No."

"Okay. How about…I tie it up in rope until it turns blue and your balls want to explode."

"No. I don't think so."

"Well, I could always staple your testicles to your penis."

He picks me up and throws me on the bed, "Well, it's obvious I can't leave things up to you. I'll just have to take this into my own hands." He hovers over me and leans down to kiss me. As our lips slide together and our tongues dance, I clasp my arms around his neck and pull him on to me wrapping him with my legs. As he relaxes into me I turn over until he is underneath me. Pulling his arms over his head I hold them as I wiggle my naked crotch against him. "Now. I have you where I want you."

"Okay. What are you going to do with me?" he asks with a big grin.

"Anything I want to." I say narrowing my eyes and flashing a sly grin.

"Have at it."

"I won't tie you up, but you have to promise not to move," I warn him.

"I promise. I won't budge." He swears. "Do your worst."

Slowly moving down his body I trail kisses and glide my tongue over his skin. Stopping at his nipples, I nip and suck until I can hear a slight groan escape him. Eliciting the response I was looking for; I continue my trek over his skin and down his body. I love the amount of hair he has. Just enough to look like a man but not enough to be bothersome. I tease his navel a bit before continuing my slow descent. Moving farther down I linger as I slide my nose in his happy trail and take in his scent.

Only another centimeter or two and my tongue reaches the tip of his manhood. I hear the gasp as my tongue continues down the underside of him finally reaching his testicles. Gently kissing them I rub my cheek against them taking them in my mouth, softly caressing them with my tongue and giving them a light tug.

"Fuck." I hear him say as he exhales. God I love doing this to him. I love the control it gives me. The way he surrenders himself to me. Releasing him I slide my tongue back up the underside of his erection and take him in my mouth. I continue sucking and swirling and gliding my tongue over him until I can feel him become tense. "God, I'm gonn'a come," he growls. I immediately release him.

"Shit. What did you do that for?" he looks up and growls.

"I'm not finished playing yet." I tell him as I take him in my hand and begin to stroke and pull and rotate my hand over his shaft.

He lies back down, "God, don't stop." He gasps as I continue to manipulate my hand up and down his manhood. I can see his breathing becoming ragged and his belly begin to quiver, "Oh, fuck, baby," he hisses. I can feel his hand as he begins to fist it in my hair. "That's it, that's it." Once again I immediately release him.

"Shit. What are you doing?" he almost cries.

"I told you not to move your hands. You disobeyed me. Now are you going to be a good boy and put them back above your head?"

"Yes. Yes. Just don't fucking stop." He says raising his arms back above his head.

Once again I slide my tongue over his length before taking him in. Sucking and pulling, I grasp him in my hand as I glide up and down. He is doing his best not to move as I continue my torture. I can hear him breathing wildly as I stroke harder and faster. "God. Don't fucking stop. Don't. Fucking. Stop." he growls.

"What?" I stop and ask. "I couldn't hear you? What did you say?" I ask innocently.

"Ana, you have no fucking idea what you're asking for if you do that again," he growls at me. He is trembling he is so frustrated.

"Oh, okay. I was just making sure. Am I doing okay? I was just checking?"

"Just finish this or let me do it. You're killing me." He lays his head back down again.

Grinning inside, I take him once again; pulling and sucking and generally torturing his member. It doesn't take long for him to begin to quiver and his breathing to hitch. "Oh shit." I continue to assault him. "Oh, fucking shit." He growls. This time I continue to pull and swirl and glide over him. "Yes." He gasps. "Fuck yes." He growls as he tenses and I feel him begin to shudder against me. As his release spills out of him I continue to stroke him with my hand until he finally starts to relax. But I don't. I continue with my hand gliding up and down using the warm liquid to facilitate the movement. Just as quickly as he began to deflate, he begins to grow again. "Stop. Don't." he whispers as I continue to pull and swirl my hand around him. "God, I can't. Stop baby." He begs, but I pay no attention as he once again is at full staff. I can feel his hands as he tries to pull me off of him. "Ana, you're gonna' kill me."

" Oh, I wouldn't let you die, baby."

"Oh fuck. Please," he relents. But his pleas fall on my deaf ears. "No. No" he gasps as I continue to drive him insane. I can see his tummy begin to quiver again and his breathing is becoming rough. Suddenly he sits up and taking me by the shoulders he throws me over on to the bed. He grabs my ankles and yanks me to him.

"You wanna' play? We'll fucking play," he growls. With one swift surprising push he has filled me.

"Oh, shit." I yell.

"See? Two can play this game?" he growls as he begins to wildly push in and out. He has taken over control and I can do nothing to resist him. This is so fast and I am already beginning to feel that pulling and tingling in my groin as my body begins to go over the edge.

"Oh, no. Not yet, baby." He gasps. Just as I begin to fall, he pulls out and flips me over propping me on my knees. Before I know what is happening, he is fully in again. His hands have a firm grip on my hips as he yanks me to him, meeting his every advance, forcing himself inside.

"Just hold on. You wanted a good fucking, I'm gonna' give you one." I grasp the covers fisting them in my hands as my body accepts him again and again. Oh, god this is fucking incredible. I am gasping for air as I feel his arm reach under me and his fingers begin to massage my wet flesh.

"Oh shit." Is all I can spit out. Every push inside is forcing me forward and I brace up on my elbows to keep from hitting the headboard. Christian fists my hair in his hand and pulls it yanking my head up as he continues his drive. I am almost exhausted as my body begins to climb higher with every jolt. The tugging in my groin begins to turn to spasms as I fall apart around him. "Christian," I screech. I think I will explode as my body is consumed by the overwhelming climax.

As I begin to relax and sink to the bed, Christian pulls me back up and continues to push into me. "Oh, no. We aren't finished yet."

"Christian, I can't. " I plead.

""What? Did you say something?" he teases continuing to thrust wildly. Grabbing my hips again he grinds in and out faster and I can hear his breathing as it becomes course and raw. He is racing toward his goal and taking me with him. "Shit." He growls and I accept one last deep push as he shudders behind me. "Ahh. Fuck." He barks and then folds over on me trembling out the last moments of his release.

Drenched in sweat we both collapse on the bed heaving to catch our breath. He finally rolls off and on to his back and I turn over on mine. "Fuckin' shit," he gasps staring at the ceiling. "Are you okay?' he asks.

"Yeah. Fine." I gasp.

"God that was bloody incredible," he says.

"Meh. It was okay." I shrug, trying not to laugh.

"God don't make me fuck you again." He smiles.

"Well, if you're not up to it…." I grin back.

He takes me in his arms and pulls me on top of him kissing me and fisting his hands in my hair. "I'm up to it alright, but please don't make me prove it," he grins up at me still trying to catch his breath. As he searches my face, he brushes my wet hair out of my eyes ,"God damn, I love you," he whispers.

"I love you too." I whisper back as I collapse on him. His hands are warm and soft as he travels my body with them paying special attention to my ass." I guess we need to get on with our bath."

"That sounds like a winning idea." He rolls me off of him following me still clutching me in his arms. One more quick kiss and he is up. He turns the water back on to finish filling the tub, and walks back into the bedroom. "Are you coming?" he asks.

"When I can walk again." I tell him. "My legs feel like Jell-O."

"Come here." He walks over and pulls me up in his arms and carries me to the bathroom. Then stepping over into the tub we descend into the warm water. After pulling me up against him he turns on the jets in the tub then pulls my hair up and fastens it. "There. Just relax. You'll feel better in a bit."

I lean back into him wrapped in his arms as he nibbles at my neck. "Mmmm that feels good." I feel so relaxed. A nice day, fucked within an inch of my life by my husband and now a warm soothing bath. "Christian, stop that."

"Stop what?" he asks.

"You know what. If you keep playing with my nipples, you'll make me come again and I'm worn out."

"I like playing with your breasts." He cups them in his hands and softly massages them.

"Well I need to finish what I started to tell you about penises."

"If there is something you think you can tell me about penises, go right ahead." He continues to nuzzle my neck.

"It's Teddy."

"What does Teddy have to do with penises? And the plural is penes."

"Well right now I'm just talking about Teddy's."

"What's wrong? Is there something wrong with his penis?" he almost sounds hysterical.

"Nothing is wrong with it. He just has some concerns and I think you should talk to him."

"What concerns does he have about his penis?" he questions.

"I was putting his pajamas on and he asked me if his would get big like yours."

"Well, mine is pretty big if I do sa …"

"Christian, this isn't about the size of your dick. I tried to explain that it would grow as his body grows and gets bigger. Then he asked if it would get as he put it, 'weird hair and stuff' on it. I tried to explain that it would and he said he didn't want it to. He doesn't. Want. To. You know. Well, he just doesn't want it to get big and hairy." I blurt out. "He likes it the way it is."

Christian bursts out into a howl of laughter.

"What?" I turn around to see him. His head is lying back and his body is shuddering with laughter.

"Ooooh fuck." He rubs his eyes and tries to catch his breath.

"What is so funny?" I ask. "Christian he seems concerned. I think you need to talk to him. I think he is afraid of growing up. Of course it didn't help when he thought I was telling him that it would fall off and a bigger one would grow in its place."

"WHAT!" he howls. "What the fuck did you tell him?" he asks.

"I was just explaining how his body will change and that it was sort of like his teeth when they fall out and a bigger one grows back in its place." I can't help but to start to laugh retelling the story. "He thought…he thought I meant that his…hhis penis would fffall off…..and a bbbigger one would grow in its ppplace." Christian and I are laughing so hard the water is about to splash over the sides of the tub.

"O…Oh my God, Ana….Y…You've scared t…the…the sssshhit..out of him. No wonder he ….he's afraid to grow upppp."

"Christian you have to fix it." I'm almost catching my breath.

"Fuck. Poor kid. I'll talk to him and explain everything."

"What are you going to tell him?"

"That his mother doesn't know shit about penes. Then give him the straight talk."

"I know a thing or two about penises. Penes sounds stupid. And I seem to do alright with yours."

"Yes, you do. You are very talented in that department, Mrs. Grey. Just stop trying to fuck up my son." He rubs his eyes, "You stick to periods and I'll cover penis territory."

"So, you'll explain penises, to Grace?" I ask.

"FUCK no. I mean with Teddy. I'm not explaining a fucking thing to Grace."

"Speaking of…how did the hair washing go?" I ask.

"A lot better than the penis talk evidently." He shakes his head, " It went fine. No trouble."

I turn back to look at him, "No trouble? I don't believe you. I saw you covered in water and I heard her all the way in Teddy's room. What happened?"

"I just had a good talk with her and explained that it had to be done and she understood and cooperated."

"Yeah. Right." I toss the bath sponge over my shoulder to him, "Here. Give me a bath."

Christian is soaping me up and I could fall asleep. What a weekend. "Are you going in to work in the morning?"

"Still says Grey on the door. I'd like to keep it that way. Why?"

"They are coming to start on the pool tomorrow and I just wondered if you wanted to be here."

"What pool?"

"Christian we talked about it. I told you that the kids had asked for one and you told me to take care of it. So I did."

"Oh. I guess I forgot. Where is it going?"

"Out back. I can show you. The drawings look beautiful. It will be an infinity pool, looking out over the lake with natural landscaping around it."

"Elliott's doing it?"

"Well one of his crews is. I don't think he is personally digging the hole."

"That's what I meant. Elliott doesn't get his hands dirty very often any more. Not since he took over the company on his own."

"I'll explain everything. I think I have the drawings in my office."

"Oh are you available this week?" he asks.

"For what?"

"The people from Pittsburg are coming in. One of them wants bring his wife. I need you to go to dinner with us one evening. Can you?"

"Of course. Just let me know where and when."

"I was thinking about the club."

"Oh, can't we take them somewhere better? I get tired of eating there."

"We can, it's just the club will keep the press away. I really don't want this getting out to the papers yet."

"Okay. Is it a big deal?"

"Yes, actually. If this goes through, it will almost double the size of the company. I don't want anything getting out prematurely and ruining it."

"Goodness. Double?" I turn to look at him.

"Yes, Mrs. Grey. You are on the verge of becoming a very wealthy woman."

"I'm already a very wealthy woman."

"Okay. Ridiculously wealthy then."

"Shit. Maybe we can afford to get Grace a new dress after all. Christian, do we really need all of that?"

"No. We don't need it. I want it."

"I just don't understand it. All it will mean is we will be more high profile, we will have less privacy and it will make us bigger targets."

"You are the only person I have ever heard complain about being rich. Let me worry about all of that."

"Okay. Whatever. It's your company."

"OUR, company."

"Well, my half doesn't need to get any bigger. I'm sort of like Teddy and his penis. I like it just the way it is."


	48. Chapter 48

_**Fifty Shades…Full Circle**_

_**Chapter 48**_

Spitting out the toothpaste and rinsing my mouth, I splash my face and look up into the mirror. Moisturizer, a girl's best friend. After shrugging into my robe I run downstairs to the kitchen. Gail has started a load of laundry and is in the laundry room sorting. I grab a mug and fill it with hot coffee adding a splash of cream. Then I pour a boiling cup of water from the kettle that Gail has heated and after dragging a bag through it, I toss the wet bag in the garbage and grab both cups.

"Good morning, Sweetheart." I kiss Christian as he ties his tie and hand him a cup of coffee.

"Thanks, baby." He takes a sip and sets it on the dresser. "You're chipper this morning."

"Yep, I'm in a pretty good mood. I had a nice weekend." I smile over at him.

Christian sits down in a chair and reaches to put his shoes on and tie them, I walk over and kneel in front of him. "Here, let me do that."

"What are you doing?" he asks.

"Helping you with your shoes." I answer smiling up at him.

"I see that. Why?"

"I just wanted to do something for you this morning. I like taking care of you."

"Well. I can't say I don't like it." He leans back in the chair and watches as I tie his black Balmoral Oxfords with closed lacings.

"There. All done."

"Thanks, Baby. And thanks for the coffee." He gives me a kiss on my cheek. "Do you have a busy day?"

"I have some reading to do and they are coming to start the pool. I guess it's pretty full. Will you be late this evening?"

"I don't plan on it. I've pushed several meetings to this morning, so I should be done on time."

"Oh, Christian, will you thank Barney for me? He was so sweet to come out and set all of my stuff up himself. I don't know why he didn't just send some techie-type kid out to do it."

"Because I don't employ any techie-type kids. And because he did it as a favor to me. But I'll thank him for you." He shrugs into his jacket after fastening his watch. "Gotta' run, babe."

"Christian, before you go, I forgot to tell you something."

He stops in his tracks, "What?"

"Don't be mad." I need to just spit it out. "But after you fired Sawyer, I hired him back." I bite my lip and wait for the fallout.

"You did?" he asks. He seems surprised to hear this and I'm shocked he hasn't hit the ceiling.

"Yes. Christian he was only doing what I asked him to do. He didn't deserve to be fired. He has been so good to all of us and I couldn't stand to lose him."

Christian puts his arms around my waist. "That's okay sweetheart. You didn't rehire him."

"What?" I'm confused. "Yes I did."

"No baby, you didn't. You didn't rehire him, because I never fired him."

"What? You told me you fired him."

"No, I said he was no longer with us. I had him reassigned for not following protocol, but I've decided to make it temporary."

"But I thought…."

"I know what you thought and I just didn't correct you."

"Christian you can be so mean." I smack his arm.

"I know." He smiles down at me. "But you love me."

"Yes. I guess I do."

"Now I really do have to go." He gives me a quick kiss.

"Okay, I'll walk down with you." I hand him his coffee mug and put my arm around him as we walk downstairs.

"Good morning, Jason." I smile at Gail's husband who is patiently waiting for Christian in the foyer. I don't think Christian could survive without Taylor. He knows what Christian wants or needs almost before Christian does. He doesn't show it enough, but Christian really does know what a treasure he has in Taylor. Christian takes care of him and Gail. They'll never want for anything. I doubt they know it, but they could retire today and never have a single financial worry for the rest of their lives.

"Good morning, Mrs. Grey. You're looking well this morning." He is always so formal to me when Christian is around. "Mr. Grey."

"Ready Taylor?"

"Yes sir. The car is waiting out front."

Christian goes to give me another quick kiss and I wrap my arms around his neck and pull him in for a very long, wet good bye kiss, releasing him only after he has been thoroughly kissed. "See you this evening."

"Yes." He clears his throat. "Well. Okay. I'll be home on time."

Closing the door as they both walk out, I can't help but giggle to myself.

"What's so funny?" Gail asks.

"Nothing. It's just Christian gets so embarrassed about showing affection in front of any of anyone."

Walking to the kitchen to grab a fresh cup of tea, Gail is just finishing cleaning up after breakfast. I don't know how she does it. She never misses a thing with the kids.

"I'm sorry for all this mess Gail. The back yard is going to be a mud pit for a while. I know keeping the kids and Jack out of it will be a pain."

"Oh, I just don't want them falling in. I can let them out front to play. We've got that huge lawn; surely they can make do with that until the pool is finished. It's going to be lovely, Ana."

"I want you and Jason to feel free to use it anytime you want to."

"Oh, I don't think that would be proper. Jason and I can use the lake if we want to swim."

"Do you like the water?" I ask.

"Yes. It's the form of exercise I enjoy most. It's good on my joints as well. We use the lake most days when the weather is good."

"I never knew that."

"Yes. We've even been known to skinny dip on occasion, only at night though. We wouldn't want to scare off all the wildlife." She chuckles.

"Oh, Gail. You and Jason make a very attractive couple."

"It's because we love each other. But that doesn't cover up the fact that we're getting up there."

"Stop it. You sound like you're ready for the nursing home."

"Some days I feel like it. Today isn't one of them, though. I need to make sure the kids are dressed. I don't worry about Teddy. He's such an angel, but that Grace. My, my she is a handful."

"I'm sorry. I have no control over her personality. Christian loves it, though. He just encourages her. She asked for a new dress yesterday and he just said 'sure anything you want'." I wave my hand as a gesture.

"Mr. Grey has always been very generous."

"Yes, but she will need some discipline at some point or we are going to have a mess on our hands. I just hope I can convince him of that." I have to chuckle. "He washed her hair last night or tried to. He said she behaved for him, but he looked like a drowned rat when he got finished."

"Well, it's good for him to spend time with them when he can. He works such long hours. Especially lately. "

"He's got something big in the works. I'm not really sure just what it is, though. I just know it's got his full attention." Sliding off the stool I drain my mug. "I need to get back to work. Oh Gail, Mr. Grey has some business associates coming to town this week. I think we will be taking them out to dinner, but you might get something planned out in your head just in case. He may want them over for cocktails or something one evening. I really don't want to with all that mess in the back yard, but this seems to be important to him. Anything I can do to help him with it, I want to. And we have an engagement at his parent's home Saturday evening. I hate to ask you to keep the kids since you just gave up your last Saturday night. Maybe Myra can fill in. Hell, she's going to be their step-grandmother, she might as well get to know them better."

"I'll make sure all the bases are covered. Don't worry."

"Gail I never worry when you are involved."

Shit. I just remembered I need a dress for Saturday.

"Gail, I have to go into town. Do you need anything?" I ask as I grab my purse from the foyer table.

"Goodness that's sudden. No. I think we're fine. I went shopping last week."

"I just remembered I have to have something to wear Saturday. I really don't want to shop, so I shouldn't be long. I'll see you after lunch."

I get out to the garage and press the key opening the door to the R8. After I slide in I hit the garage opener and back out into the drive. I'm off. It's not too far to the front gate, the house is just hidden by landscaping; giving the illusion of being secluded. I like it out here on the point. Most everyone out here is in the same boat with us, needing their privacy. As I make my way to the road that will connect me with town, I pass the Gates house. If anyone needs privacy, I guess he does. We aren't that wealthy, at least not yet.

I hope Christian knows what he is getting us into with this latest venture. I hate the thought of even less privacy and more security. He just loves to acquire things. It reminds me of that saying, 'He who dies with the most toys wins.' He certainly is well on his way to winning. Maybe that's why he lets Grace have anything she wants.

Finally I pull out on to 520, and head toward Bellevue and Neiman's. Caroline is taking a month this summer to go to Europe and so I'm on my own for clothes. It might be a good thing. Caroline always knows what I like and what Christian likes for me to wear and she has them ready for me. It might be nice to look at some things that she wouldn't usually show me.

Merging on to 405 I head for the eighth street exit and the Bravern where Neiman's is located. I finally get parked and make my way into the store.

"May I help you?" I'm greeted by a lovely young sales girl as I enter. She could use a good meal, but she's pretty.

"Yes. I need evening wear please."

"Couture?"

"Yes. That's fine."

"Follow me. I'll be glad to show you." I follow her skinny little butt through the store until we reach the couture evening wear. "One moment." I stop and glance around as she quickly returns with a sales person.

" This is Allison, she will be glad to serve you this morning."

"Thank you." I tell her as she exits leaving me in Allison's capable hands.

"Mrs. Grey. It's a pleasure to serve you. What can I help you with today?"

I'm not sure how much of the pleasantly formal banter I can take. "Hello, Allison. Actually I need a cocktail dress for an event this week."

"I see. And what type of event are we talking about?"

"It's a charity cocktail party for Children's Hospital."

"Is there anything in particular you are looking for? Any specific designer, style or color?"

"No actually, I usually use a stylist, Caroline Acton, but she is away in Europe and this event just came up."

I finally elicit a smile from the tall, lovely blond, dressed in a form fitting black dress and black pumps. "Yes. I understand she is visiting quite a few of the design houses while she is over there. She should bring back some very lovely things."

"I usually dress very conservatively. Very tailored and structured. Not revealing. My husband prefers that, but I think I'd enjoy seeing a few edgier things. Color doesn't really matter. I always lean toward black, but I'm open to any suggestions."

"I see. What are we looking at, a four?" she asks.

"Yes. I think so. I was recently pregnant and I really haven't gotten it all off yet, but almost. My size could have changed."

"Your figure should complement the designs well. Although the length may have to come up a bit."

She motions toward the fitting rooms and I follow her there. She begins to bring dress after dress. Most are just gorgeous and I love them, but Christian would never approve. Besides, I'm the wife of Christian Grey and mother of his children. Something too risqué would certainly end up in the papers.

"Allison, when I said edgy, I didn't mean revealing. I meant trendy, not as conservative." I try to explain.

"I see. I have something, just off the runway. I think you might like it. Just a moment."

She returns with just what I'm looking for. "It's Lanvin. It just came in."

"Oh, I like it." Allison helps me into the dress and I need help. It's black but I still love it. It's three pieces and it takes instructions just to put it on. It starts with a black jersey body suit, racer back with high cut thighs. The front has a deep 'V' neckline and the leg is cut up to the waist. Over that goes a sheer silk georgette blouse with cap sleeves. The high cut neck ties with a voluminous bow with a raw edge. On top of that goes the strapless dress. It is crinkle crinoline with a subtle sheen, tiered plisse bodice and A-line skirt. And a skinny leather belt. It hits mid- thigh.

"I really like this, Allison."

She smiles, "I thought you might. It was originally shown on the runway with black cowboy boots, but of course for your needs I'm sure some strappy heels would better serve the ensemble."

"I'm just not sure it isn't too edgy."

"It's all in what you are comfortable with. I can certainly show you some more conservative styles."

"Yes. I'd like to see some others, but let's not discount this one yet." She leaves to retrieve some other dresses and I look at the price tag. Damn! This thing is $8075. Then I notice that all three pieces are priced separately. The body suit is $690 and the blouse is $1520. Oh, my. This is ridiculous. That's over ten thousand dollars. But it is so cute.

Allison enters with several other things. I finally settle on a St. John limestone (that's gray) beaded metallic, striped, color block shift. It has a bateau neck and is sleeveless with a shift silhouette and hits me mid-knee. It's all imported Italian materials. It's conservative yet trendy looking. And it's at a bargain at only $1295.

"I think this will be it." I tell Allison.

"It's beautiful on you, Mrs. Grey. And are we saying no to the Lanvin?" She holds it up for me to take a last look.

Walking over I take it in my hands to look at it again. "It is lovely and just what I wanted." Christian is always telling me to spend money. He never asks what anything costs. He did just buy that damn plane and who knows how much that cost. Ana you could almost buy a new car for what this costs, I try to tell myself. It's ridiculous. "I'll take this one too." It's out of my mouth and I can't believe I have said it.

"Very good Mrs. Grey. It was spectacular on you. No one else will have this dress. I'll have the seamstress up in a moment to have it fitted for you."

I'm sure Allison is turning cartwheels over this sale. As angry as I am with myself, I feel like a kid on Christmas inside. I can wear those shoes that Christian likes so much with it. They'll be perfect. The seamstress comes in and fits both dresses for me. My hand wants to tremble as I hand over my black card. Amazing. It went right through. Why would I ever doubt that it wouldn't? I give them my address and number to have them delivered Wednesday then leave to return to the car. I almost stop to look at little girl's dresses for Grace, but I decide to wait and bring her with me so she can pick it out.

Back in my car on the way home, I feel so naughty. I don't know why. Christian will be happy that I was finally extravagant with myself. It was a really great dress. I guess I can wear the gray one out to dinner with the Pittsburg people. I can't help but grin as I do my happy dance inside. I just don't want to become one of those people to who money has no meaning. I'll make sure I keep my head out of the clouds.

After I get home and check with Gail, I check on the kids and return to work for a while. Sitting back down at my desk, I begin the arduous task of tearing this latest piece down and trying to help rebuild it. I really need to meet with her in person instead of conferencing. Her stories are so good, but she can't write for shit. I think we can rewrite this and really have something, at least I hope so. She just has a habit of over writing. Sometimes that happens with inexperienced writers. They think tossing in a big words and flowery language makes it sound better. It just makes it hard to wade through and difficult to read. I think if we can take the crap out and make it cleaner it will flow a lot better. Actually…"Shit!" I jump when my phone rings.

"Hello, Ana Grey."

"Uh… I uh…"

"Yes. Can I help you? Who is this?"

"Um…Mrs. Grey. This is Lorna."

"Who? Lorna. Have we met?"

"I'm …sorry I think I have the wrong number."

It dawns on me. "Oh, no. Lorna. Now I remember. Please don't hang up."

"Oh, okay."

"Lorna, is everything alright? Do you need something?" I ask.

"Well, no. I mean yes, sort of."

"I'm listening. What's wrong, sweetheart?"

"Well, you said I could call you if we ever needed anything."

"Yes. I remember. What is it? Please tell me."

"It's my boy. It's Tommy."

My heart leaps into my throat. " Lorna. What's happened to Tommy?"

"Mrs. Grey, I..um..I wouldn't a called, but.."

"Lorna, please just tell me what is going on. Is Tommy alright?"

"Well no. But he's gonna' be okay. He's in the hospital."

"What's going on Lorna? Did something happen to him?"

"He has pneumonia. But don't worry. He gets it sometimes. It's just, first of all they want to send him home way too soon. He ain't completely well yet. I don't have any way to stay with him all the time. This is the third time this year. The CCS says if I don't take better care of him and make sure he gets his medicine, they'll take him away." I can hear her crying over the phone.

"Lorna, I'm so sorry. What can I do, sweetheart?"

"Well, he needs to stay longer, but we only have that Medi-Cal, or at least he did. I couldn't get down there to get it renewed and now they say he has to go. And he needs medicine and I can't always get it." She is really breaking down now.

"Lorna. Lorna honey. Where is he? What hospital?"

"Um…"she is sniffling "at that UC. I'm just afraid they're gonna' take him cause I can't do for him like I should."

"Okay. Let me think…..Look how can I get back in touch with you? Do you have a phone?"

"Um. I don't have one right now. You can use this number. It belongs to a friend, but she'll get a message to me."

"Oh. Lorna, what's Tommy's last name?"

"It's Blakley, same as mine."

"Okay and his birthdate?"

" October 12."

"Okay Lorna, I'll think of something. Don't worry. I'll figure out what we can do and I'll call back."

"Okay. I'm sorry for callin' you. You seemed to take a liking to 'em and I just didn't have nowhere else to go."

"I know. You did the right thing. I'm sure we can figure out something. Lorna? Are you okay? Do you need anything?"

"Yeah. I'm fine. I just gotta work or I'll get in trouble. I can't be at the hospital with him. But I'm okay."

"Alright sweetheart. I'll get back in touch soon, okay?"

"Sure. Thanks. We appreciate it."

"Don't worry. It will work out."

I hang up the phone and try to think. First of all I need to make sure Tommy gets what he needs. Then I need to work out some place for them to stay and make sure she can take care of him. Checking on the computer I find the webpage for UC Davis to find the phone number.

"UC Davis. How may I direct your call?"

"May I have the business office please?"

"One moment."

"All of our customer service representatives are with other customers right now. Your call is important to us…."

"Yeah, yeah. I know I'm important." While I wait several minutes, I listen to a gentleman with a velvety voice instruct me on how to control my diabetes and cholesterol, before someone finally answers.

"This is Mrs. Anderson in patient accounts. How can I help you?"

"I'm not sure how to go about this , but I have a friend that is in your facility and I understand there may be a problem with payment. I'd like to make arrangements to take care of the bill. "

"Yes ma'am. When was the patient discharged?"

"I think he is still there."

"Name?"

"Tommy Blakely."

"Date of birth?"

"October 12."

"What year?"

"Oh. I'm not sure. I know he is three years old."

"Okay. I have him here. He has coverage under Medi-Cal, but I see it ends tomorrow."

"Yes that's what I understand. I want to cover whatever he needs. I want him to stay until he is well enough to go home."

"Ma'am, this is Medicaid and he's under 21. I'm sure they'll cover him. He certainly won't be discharged until he is ready."

"I don't care. I want to pay for it. I want him to have the best. I'll cover doctors, tests, room and board everything."

"Yes, ma'am. And how will you be taking care of this?"

"Can I give you a credit card or set up an account?"

"Ma'am. This account will probably exceed a credit card. I can set you up an account for billing. I'll need your name."

"Ana Grey, Mrs. Christian Grey actually."

"Oh, Mrs. Christian Grey?"

"Yes."

"Okay. I can probably take that card number for payment."

I give her all the information to get things set up. She tells me that I will need to sign papers authorizing charges of that amount to my account. I have her mail them to me.

"Oh, Mrs. Anderson, is there a pharmacy there for patients to get prescriptions filled?'

"Yes ma'am."

"Can you please have any prescriptions that he might need charged to me?"

"Yes, ma'am I'll make sure it's on the account. Is there anything else I can do for you today?"

"Yes. Can you transfer me to someone who can tell me how he is, please?"

"Yes, ma'am. One moment, I'll give you patient information."


	49. Chapter 49

_**Fifty Shades…Full Circle**_

_**Chapter 49**_

After talking with information I find out that Tommy is stable and improving, but still very sick. I just want to cry thinking about him so sick and in the hospital all by himself. He must be so scared. I want to find a way for Lorna to be able to stay with him, but I'm afraid to give her cash. I don't want her using it to buy drugs instead of taking care of Tommy. As much as I hate to do it, I'll talk to Christian about it. He's good at finding solutions to things.

I dial the number that Lorna called from.

"Yeah."

"I was told I could reach Lorna Blakely at this number. Is she available?"

"Uuuuhh. She's …uh…busy right now."

"Oh, well can I leave her a message?"

"Sure. Shoot."

"Tell her that Ana called and I have taken care of things and to please get in touch with me. Got that?"

"Yeah. Call Ana, Things taken care of. I'll tell her."

"Thank you."

I feel so helpless. I really want to go down there and see what is going on for myself.

I hear a timid knock on my office door and the door gently opens. Looking up, I see Gail's face peer around the door.

"Oh, come on in Gail." I run my hands through my hair and sigh leaning back in my chair.

"Ana, what is it? You look upset."

"I am a bit. "

"Anything I can do?" she asks as I motion for her to sit down.

"No. I just have an issue that I probably need to talk to Mr. Grey about."

"Are you sure I can't do anything?" she gives me a tentative look. "Want to tell me about it?"

"Sure… When I was in Sacramento a few weeks ago, I ran into this little boy on the street outside my hotel. He looked to be about three or so. He was all by himself and eating the remains of someone's sandwich."

"All alone? On a city street?" a look of horror clouds her face.

"Yes. When I tried to take him inside the hotel to call the police, this young girl appeared and said that it was her son and she had stepped away for a moment."

"Why, you can't leave a child that young all by himself even for a moment. What was she thinking?" Gail looks horrified at the thought.

"I know." I shake my head. "Anyway to make a long story short. I had seen her panhandling outside the hotel on several occasions prior to that. I felt sorry for them and wanted to give her some money for food for the child, but I felt like she would probably just spend it on drugs or something. I offered to take them both to get something to eat and did, then gave her a little cash to help out. Gail I was just so taken with this child. You know how sometimes you just make a connection with someone? Just sort of on a metaphysical level?"

"Yes. I suspect Mr. Grey's past may have had something to do with that feeling. "

"That's possible I guess. Well I gave her my card and asked her to call me if they ever needed any help."

"And she's called?"

"Yes. Just a few minutes ago. Seems Tommy, that's his name, is in the hospital with pneumonia and child services is threatening to take custody because she doesn't care for him properly."

"Would that be a bad thing? I mean if the child is truly being neglected, maybe he would be better off somewhere else."

"Oh, probably." I lean forward on my desk and play with my pen. " I just hate to think about him being torn away from his mother. I couldn't bear it if someone took Teddy or Grace away and I never saw them again. But my heart just aches for that little boy. Gail he was so dirty that he smelled bad and so hungry that he was eating a discarded sandwich." Pulling a tissue from the box on my desk, I blot my eyes and cheeks.

"Ana, there is a lot of pain and sadness in the world. You just saw a little piece of it. So what are you going to do?" she asks me.

I sniffle a bit as I wipe my nose, "What do you mean?"

"Ana, I've known you long enough to realize that you will try to fix this for the boy and his mother. You won't walk away from it."

I can't help but give her a weak smile. "Christian keeps telling me to stop trying to fix things. But I did call the hospital and set up an account to take care of his bill and for any needs that he might have. I just need to find a way to get him some care after he goes home. If he even has a home to go to. Which is highly suspect."

"That's a difficult one. So what you really need to do is help the mother, so she can care for the child?"

"Yep." I nod.

"Does she want to care for him?"

"Yes. I mean I think so. She really seems to love him. She's just in a bad place and I doubt she has any way out."

"Is she on drugs?"

"I think that's a definite possibility. I wouldn't be surprised if she wasn't prostituting to support her habit."

"Oh. That's so sad. That poor girl and that child exposed to all of that."

"I know. Well anyway, I suppose I'll talk to Christian about it and see if we can come up with a solution to help these two."

"You'll get it worked out. Perhaps some sort of drug rehab for the mother. Get her better and then help her get back on her feet."

"Yes. I had thought about that. I just need a way of getting Tommy taken care of while that happens. If she'll even agree to it."

"Mr. Grey has the resources to make things happen and he does very frequently. I'm sure you two will come up with something." She starts to stand to leave.

"Gail? Did you need something when you came in?"

"Oh. I almost forgot. I was picking up Grace's things in her room and I checked her little purse. Ever since she had your ring, I try to check it on a regular basis for 'treasures'."

"That's a good idea. She can be a packrat."

"Anyway, I checked it a few minutes ago and I found this." She holds up a piece of paper money. "It's a hundred dollar bill."

"What!? Where did she get this?"

"I have no idea. I knew she would pitch a fit if I took it, so I haven't said anything to her."

I take the piece of money and inspect it. "Okay. Good. I'll talk to her and see if she will tell me where she got a hundred dollars. She doesn't even know what a hundred dollars is. That is just so weird. I can't imagine where it came from."

Gail stands up to leave. "I'm doing that chateaubriand tonight before it spoils. Thought I'd make the kids some chicken fingers since they won't eat that."

"That sounds good. Christian was highly disappointed he missed it on Saturday."

"Good. Well I'll let you get back to work. And don't worry over the child. You and Mr. Grey will come up with something."

I sit for a moment staring at the large paper note in front of me inspecting it. How does this happen? How can one three year old walk around with a hundred dollars in a play purse and another one not have something as basic as food and shelter and safety? Fuck . How could I have spent that much money on that damn dress?

* * *

"ANA" I can hear Christian. "ANA? WHERE IS EVERYBODY?"

I run down the staircase. "I'm upstairs. I'm coming." Hitting the landing I rush over to him and give him a quick kiss.

"Hey, baby. How was your day?" he puts his arms around my waist and gives me a big smile.

"It was okay. How was yours?" I ask.

"Good. Actually, really good. Everything is going smoothly with the acquisition, so far. Most of the departments are running well, no big issues. I love it when it's smooth sailing for a change."

I put my arms around his neck and fist his hair pulling him to me until our lips seal and my tongue finds his. I can feel him pull me closer to him until our kiss is broken. "Well, I like that. What did I do to deserve it?" he says as he kisses my forehead and releases me. He takes off his suit jacket and hangs it on the banister.

"You came home. I missed you today." We put our arms around each other and walk to the family room and sit down.

"Do you want a drink?" I ask.

"Yeah, I'll fix it. You want one?" he as asks as he loosens his tie and unbuttons the collar of his shirt.

"Sure. I'll join you." I sit down on the sofa and wait for him to return with two Hendricks and tonic. He hands me my drink and eases down next to me on the sofa.

"Where are my kids?"

"They are in their rooms right now. I'm sure they'll be down as soon as they figure out you're home."

"So what did you get in to today, Mrs. Grey?" he asks as he sips his gin and tonic.

"Actually, a lot. I can tell you about it later."

"Tell me about it now." He motions for me to move closer and snuggle against him.

"Well, I spent a large amount of your money today."

"You did? You mean you didn't spend your own money Miss Independent?" he asks.

"Well to start with I haven't been paid yet and second, what I spent is more than I would make in a month."

"I see. Well, you know you can spend whatever you want to. What is mine is yours."

"I know. I just hope you feel that way after I tell you what I spent."

"What did you do buy a building down town?" he smiles down at me.

"No. I bought a rather expensive dress. Too expensive."

"Ana, I told you to go buy a new dress. I don't care what it cost."

"Actually I bought two dresses."

"Do you like them?"

"Oh, yes. Christian they are so cute, especially one of them. I just loved it. I would never have spent that much money on a dress, but it was just what I was looking for and it looked so nice on me,…."

"Whoa. Sweetheart, you don't have to justify it. You may have any dress you want."

"Even if it's…"I squint and hold my breath." ten thousand dollars?"

"Ten thousand?" He appears to be a bit taken aback.

"Yes. I'm sorry. I don't know what got into me. I can call and cancel it if they haven't started to alter it yet."

"Baby. It's okay. Don't worry about it. If you liked it and wanted it, I'm glad for you to have it. You never spend money on yourself. I'm glad to see you finally do something like this."

I relax . "Oh, Christian, thank you."

"What does this dress look like?" he takes another sip.

"Well, it's black and it's hard to describe, but it's a cocktail dress and it's by Lanvin and it's just off the runway."

"Hmm," he nods his head. "No wonder it cost that much."

"Do you even know who Lanvin is?" I ask him.

"Yes. Do you?" he smiles at me.

"Well, no, not exactly. Christian, how do you know so much about women's clothes?"

"I admire a woman in fine clothing, especially my wife." He gives me a quick kiss. "I'm sure it will look spectacular and I'm glad you got it."

"Well that was easy."

"Ana, you know money is not something that I worry about when it comes to you or the kids. Spend what you want to. I work hard for it and I want us to enjoy it."

"Well, I spent a little more on something else, but I need to talk to you about it and I want to wait until after dinner when we can talk uninterrupted."

"Hmmm. That sounds ominous."

"Maybe not."

He sets his drink down and takes mine and sets it on the table as well. He pulls me to him, "Now. Let's make out until time for dinner."

Christian pulls me into his arms and cradles me; searching my face as he strokes my cheek. He smiles and lowers his head as he rubs his nose against mine and looks into my eyes before brushing his lips over mine.

* * *

During dinner I pick at my food. I don't really feel much like eating.

"Ana, you aren't eating. What's wrong?" Christian looks down the table from me as he enjoys his chateaubriand with potatoes and fresh asparagus.

"I'm fine. I'm just not hungry I guess."

"What is it baby?" he continues to prod me.

"Christian, I'm going to call Neiman's and cancel that dress. Hopefully they haven't started to alter it."

"No, you aren't. I want you to keep it," he says as he swallows his steak.

"Christian, I've never had any piece of clothing that was that expensive. There is no need for me to start now. It's just ridiculous."

"Yes you have."

"I have what?" I ask.

"You've had clothing that cost that much."

"When? I've never spent that much."

He looks at his plate as he cuts another bite off, "Remember before we got married and I filled your closet?"

"Yes."

"I didn't fill it with cheap goods. I wanted you to have the best. You deserved the best then and you deserve it now."

"Christian. I had no idea."

"I know," he grins up at me. "I knew you would never have accepted them if you knew what they cost."

"Did you always spend that much?" I know the kids will have no idea what we're talking about.

"Nope. Only you. Only the best for the girl who found my heart and then stole it away from me." He takes a big sip of wine after he raises his glass to me.

"Christian. You can be so sappy sometimes. But please don't ever stop." I cut off a piece of steak and try to eat for him.

"Did you get me a new dwess today too?" Grace asks as she chews on a chicken strip.

"No sweetheart. I started to, but thought you might like to pick it out yourself. Do you want to do that?"

"Uh huh." She nods furiously.

"Okay. Then you and Mommy will plan a day to go shopping. Okay?"

"Uh huh. Peese. I go chopping wif you."

"That reminds me. Grace I need to ask you something. Today Gail found some money in your pink purse. Did you know about that?" I ask her.

"Uh huh, yesth. My muny."

"Grace where did you get that money?"

"What money?" Christian asks.

"Gail found a hundred dollar bill in her purse."

"Well, just let her keep it. It's no big deal." He tries to convince me.

"Christian. It is a big deal. First of all, where would she get that much money. Second she doesn't need to be carrying it around like a toy."

"MY muny, Mama. I keep it." she insists.

"But Grace. Where did you get the money, sweetheart?"

"How come Grace got a hundred dollars and I didn't?" Teddy wails.

"Teddy. I don't know. That's what I'm trying to find out." I try to calm him.

"But that's not fair. I want some too." He whines again.

"Teddy. Later. Please, sweetheart."

"Oh, Baby, don't get so bent out of shape about it. The kids need a little money for things they want." Christian argues.

"Will everyone please hush? I'm trying to ask Grace a question."

Finally silence. "Now. Grace. Tell me where you got that money."

"MY muny."

"I know it's your money. Who gave it to you?"

"Ana…"

"Christian. Please." I admonish him

"Doddy."

"What?" I'm stunned.

"Doddy gibed it to me," she says.

"Grace, your father gave you a hundred dollars?" I ask in amazement.

"Uh huh. I be good and he gibed it to me." she repeats.

I stare at Christian who is avoiding eye contact. "Grace when were you good for Daddy to give you money?"

"Doddy wash my haiw. I be good so he can wash my haiw," she says.

"Christian? You bribed her to wash her hair?"

"Not really. We discussed it, each presenting our side of the argument, offers were tendered, and compromises accepted. Then a contract was negotiated, a verbal agreement made and goods exchanged. It was strictly business." He grins at me.

"Well I have confiscated your incentive money." I tell him.

"I told you I could out maneuver a three year old. I win." He gives me a smug smirk.

"I don't think so, hot shot. You see, she has no concept of money. She would have settled for a dollar. She took you to the cleaners for ninety nine dollars, Mr. CEO." I smirk at him. "I certainly hope you do a better job with the Pittsburg deal than you did with her."

We continue eating and Christian and I continue sneaking eye contact and stealing smiles with each other. "Is your fillet good?" I ask.

"Mmm. Yes. Perfect. Gail did a good job. As always."

"It needed to be cooked before it went bad."

"Teddy, you look deep in thought. What's going on?" Christian asks him.

"Oh, nuffin." He says picking at his fries.

"Are you sure? " Christian asks.

"I just had sumthin' on my brain."

"Something on your brain?" Christian asks with a smirk. "You mean like a tumor or a blood clot?"

Teddy grins and giggles, "Nooo. I was thinkin' bout sumthin."

"Well do you want to talk about it?" Christian asks.

Teddy sighs, "Dad. Does it hurt when your pendis falls off?"

Christian and I freeze and stare at each other. I think I will explode trying to keep from laughing.

Grace breaks out in hysterical laughter, "Theddy thaid about hith pee pee. That funy Theddy."

"What son?" Christian swallows his bite whole.

"Mom explained about how your pendis grows and said it might fall off and I was just wonderin' if hurts. And what do I pee with until it grows back?"

"Theddy thaid pee again." Grace is hysterical; hiding her face in her hands and writhing in her chair.

"Grace. That's not funny. Now calm down and eat." I reach over and try to get her to sit still.

"Well son, first of all this is not proper dinner conversation. Second it's not polite to talk about your…privates in front of your sister. Third, after dinner we can talk about it and I'll tell you everything. Right now you need to finish you dinner." Christian has managed to remain the picture of calm during the situation.

"Okay." He pouts. "You asked me."

"I know, but….we'll talk about it later. Okay?"

"Theddy's pee pee gon to faw off." Grace is still giggling,

"Grace." Christian barks. "Finish you dinner."

Christian and I manage to avoid eye contact the rest of the meal. I just know if we look at each other we'll crumble.

* * *

Stopping at the door to Christian's office I watch as he studies his laptop screen and taps furiously on the keyboard. He works so hard. "Christian after the kids go to bed, I need to talk to you about something. Will you have some time?"

He looks up over the screen, "Huh? Oh, sure. I just have a bit more to do here and then I'm all yours."

"I like the sound of that." I give him a smile and a wink as I turn to leave him to his business.

Trying to wrangle my children, I finally have Grace in her gown. The little con artist actually asked me for money to let me put her night gown on her.

"I no weddy fo bed, Mama." She is giving me the Grace pout.

"Well, It's time for bed sweetheart. Come on get up in there." I'm holding her covers up for her to climb in, helping her as she steps up on her little stool and climbs into bed. Sitting down on the bed next to her, I tuck her in up to her chin and kiss her forehead.

"Mama. I not seepy."

"I know, but if you lie really still and close your eyes, before you know it, it will be tomorrow. Want me to rub your back for a while?"

She nods and turns on her tummy. I gently rub my hand over her little back and soon she is out like a light.

I pull my T-shirt off and unfasten my bra as the water pours into the tub. Grasping my breasts in my hands I massage them a bit. It feels so good to get that bra off.

"I'll be glad to help you with that." I turn around to see Christian smiling behind me, just having taken his shirt off.

"It just feels so good to take that bra off." I slide out of my panties and step into the water; then pull my hair up and fasten it. Christian doffs is slacks and boxers and steps in behind me. He pulls me to him as we descent into the warm foamy water.

"Did you talk to Teddy?" I ask him.

"Yeah. I think we got it all straightened out. He seems to feel a lot better about it, now that he knows his dick will remain attached. I told him how to pronounce it too. I didn't think I'd ever get him to say penis. I started to tell him to just call it his dick, but I figured you wouldn't appreciate that."

"You figured right. I feel so awful getting him confused like that. Christian, I'm a terrible mother. How could I have upset him?"

"You aren't a terrible mother." He pulls me in his arms and hugs me. "You're the best mother I know. He'll survive and live to grow a big one, one day. He's still not too happy about the hair part."

"What did you tell him about that?"

"I explained that it would grow in different places and showed him my legs and arms and chest. I just told him it was part of growing up and when the time came it wouldn't bother him. When I explained he'd get muscles too, he was a lot happier."

"That's good. I was worried I had really messed up."

"Just don't use the same analogy with Grace. I don't want her thinking her boobs will fall off."

"I think can handle that one. " I can feel him pull me back against him and cup my breasts massaging and rubbing them.

"What did you want to talk to me about?" he asks.

I rub my hands over my face and sigh, "Oh Christian. I have a mess on my hands."

"That doesn't sound good. What happened baby?"

"Remember I told you about that little boy and his mother that I saw while I was in Sacramento?"

"Yes."

"I gave her my card and told her to call me if she ever needed any help."

"Let me guess. She called."

I nod. "Yes. Tommy, the little boy is in the hospital with pneumonia and they are threatening to take him away from her because she hasn't been taking care of him. She was so upset over it."

"What does she think you can do about it?" he asks.

"I'm not sure. She was also upset because she thought that she had messed up and he was going to lose his Medi-Cal, Medicaid, whatever it is. And she said she couldn't get his medicines and she couldn't be home to take care of him like she wanted to."

"Well, maybe the state should take him. Doesn't sound like she is able to take care of him."

"Christian, she's his mother. I would hate to see them ripped apart. I want to help them."

"What do you want to do?" he asks kissing my neck.

"Well I already called the hospital and set up an account for them to bill me for the medical care as well as setting up an account for her to get his medicines when he needs them."

"Sounds reasonable. We can certainly afford to help with that."

"The problem is when Tommy is discharged from the hospital."

"Why, Sweetheart?"

"Well, they really don't have a proper home and from what I gather she can't stay home and care for him. She can't leave him home alone. He's way too little and too sick."

"Okay."

"If I give her money, I'm afraid she will use it for drugs. And Christian, I think she may be prostituting to support them."

"You mean to support her habit."

"Yes. That too." I lean back against him and he gives me a hug.

"What do you want to do?"

"That's why I'm talking to you. You always find solutions to things. What do you think we should do?"

"If you really are set on helping them out, the only way I see of doing it is to see if she will go to rehab and get clean and then help give her a new start."

"Christian, would you really agree to do that?" I ask, so surprised that he will let me get so involved with these people.

"I guess if we can help thousands half way around the world, it's sort of hypocritical not to help someone in our own back yard."

"Christian. Do you really mean that?" I sit up and turn around to look at him. "You'd really let me get involved?"

"Is there any way to stop you?"

"No. But I'd really like for you to agree to it. Please."

"I guess it's okay as long as you don't bring any of it home. I don't want the kids touched by any of this."

"I won't. What day are the people from Pittsburg coming?" I ask.

"Thursday. Why?"

"Crap. Christian I want to fly down and try to talk to Lorna and see if I can talk her into going for some help."

"Oh, Ana. I'm not sure I want you down in all that mess. People involved that deeply in drugs and prostitution can be dangerous. I don't think this is something you need to be doing." He tucks a strand of hair behind my ear and strokes my cheek.

"But I just want to go to the hospital and make sure Tommy is okay and sign the papers to take care of the hospital bill. I'm sure I can get her to meet me at the hospital. I wouldn't have to put myself in any danger."

"I don't like it. If you're going to do something like that, I want to be with you."

"I can take Luke. He'll make sure I'm safe."

"No. I don't like it. I can send someone down to take care of everything. I don't want you around all of that."

"But Christian. She probably won't listen to anyone else."

"If I didn't have this deal in the works, I'd go with you. I just can't leave right now."

"Shoot. I really want to see Tommy. I just feel so sorry for him." I can't stop my voice from beginning to crack and I feel my chin tremble as the tears begin to fall.

"Hey. Don't get so upset over it, Baby." I can feel his soft lips as he gently kisses my neck. "Look, We'll find some way of working it out. And, Ana?"

"What?"

"Please don't let yourself get too attached to this boy. Please be careful."

"I won't. He is just special somehow. I want to see him taken care of. " We sit in silence for a few moments as I try to think of a way to work this out." Christian, could I use the plane to run down there, tomorrow? I'll take Sawyer and I promise I won't leave his side for a moment…and I won't go anywhere but the hospital. No going to any shady parts of town or dealing with anyone but Lorna. I promise."

"You know the plane is yours to use. I won't be needing it this week, that I know of. But I'd rather that you didn't. I'd like for you to wait until I can go with you."

"I know. I'd prefer that too. But Tommy is in the hospital now and he may be discharged soon. I want to get this in the works before they have time to take him away. You need to be here this week. And you need to keep your mind on the acquisition, not worrying over this mess."

"You're going to do it no matter what I say, aren't you?"

"No. I won't ever go behind your back again. I promise. This just means a lot to me."

"It's against my better judgment, but I'll tell Stephen to have the plane at your disposal and give Sawyer instructions. Ana, don't even try to make a move without him, do you understand? I'll have you dragged home by the hair and never let you out again if you do."

"Thank you. I promise to follow the rules. I won't get into any trouble."

"And you won't go running all over town. You'll meet this girl at the hospital and nowhere else."

"I promise. Really. I won't leave Sawyer's side."

"He'll have instructions and believe me he won't deviate from them, this time."

I turn around and face him circling his neck with my arms. "I love you."

"Yeah, yeah. You're just in it for the plane." He smirks.

"That's right. It's always been about the plane." I tease. "Oh, what day will you be taking those people out to dinner?"

"Probably Thursday evening. Maybe Friday."

"Okay. I promise to be back by Thursday at the latest to entertain the wives and show 'em a good time."

"I thought you were just going for the day tomorrow?"

"That's the plan, but just in case, I promise to be back no later than Thursday morning."

"Mmm. Okay. In that case, you'll need a hotel. I'll have reservations made for you, just in case."

"Christian. What do I do if she agrees to go to rehab?"

"Well, I'll check with Flynn in the morning to see if he can recommend a good facility and make the arrangements for us. "

"Good. What do we do with Tommy?"

"I think some of the facilities have accommodations for the children. At least one in Seattle does, or so I've heard."

"So are you thinking of bring them back to Seattle ?"

"I think so. If, this girl will agree to it. It would probably be better to get her out of that environment anyway. Then once she leaves rehab, we can get her set up here. That way she can't fall back in with her old crowd."

"That makes sense. I just hope she'll agree to let us help her."

Searching his face, I give him a smile. I knew if I let him come up with a solution, he would be more likely to let me get involved. Always let him think it was his idea.


	50. Chapter 50

_**Fifty Shades…Full Circle**_

_**Chapter 50**_

"Neiman Marcus, how may I direct your call?" I hear on the other end.

""Yes, May I have couture evening wear?"

"Eveningwear, how may I help you?"

"Hello. This is Ana Grey."

"Yes. Hello Mrs. Grey This is Allison."

"Hi, Allison. I hate to do this but I've decided against the black Lanvin. I hope they haven't started alterations yet."

"Let me check for you. One moment." I listen to the elevator version of Mandy for a bit."Mrs. Grey?"

"Yes. I'm still here."

"They have not started yet. Are you sure? It was so lovely on you."

"I know. I've just changed my mind. I'm sorry. I appreciate your help Allison and I'll make sure I ask for you next time I'm in."

"No problem Mrs. Grey. I'll have it taken care of for you. Is there anything else I can do for you?"

"No. Thank you, so much Allison."

Well that's a load off my mind. That was just driving me crazy. I must have been insane to buy something like that. I'll give Christian a quick text.

* * *

_Morning Baby. Hope I'm not bothering U. Need a phone to take to Lorna so I can get in touch with her. Can I get one from IT or would a prepaid be better?_

_A ;)_

* * *

Within a moment my phone rings.

"Christian?"

"Hey, Sweetheart."

"I wasn't expecting you to call. I was trying not to bother you."

"Ana, you never bother me. I wanted to call back to talk to you before you leave. I'm still very uncomfortable with this situation."

"I know. I just don't see any other way to handle it."

"Look, Taylor, Welch and I talked this morning. There is a change in security. Taylor is going with you instead of Sawyer. Reynolds and Cassidy will be going as well."

"Okay. Why Taylor instead of Sawyer?"

"I just feel better about Taylor's abilities and I know he won't let you talk him into doing anything you're not supposed to. You are to be in Taylor's presence at all times do you understand me , Ana?"

"Even the ladies room?" I tease.

"Of course not. Any personal needs you can tend to by yourself. And stop rolling your eyes."

"You always know, don't you?" I have to laugh.

"Yes, so don't try to get anything over on me. Taylor will be with you and Reynolds and Cassidy will be shadowing. You are not to let anyone use your phone or lend it out and you are to have it with you at all times. Do you understand? I don't need another wild goose chase tracking your phone to bumfuck Egypt when someone else has it. "

"Yes, sir. I understand. I will always be in the presence of Jason. I will always have my phone on my person and I will not meet anyone other than Lorna and only at the hospital."

"Good."

"Christian, I won't do anything. I promise. If I do, you can divorce me and take the kids."

"Ana, I don't want to divorce you. Just the opposite. I need you and I need you safe and sound. Just remember, it's not just me , you have two children here that need you."

"I know. I need all of you too. And I'm just going to see a three year old in the hospital and talk with his mother; I'm not on a covert mission to the Middle East."

"Okay. I'll send a phone with Taylor that you can give the girl. It will have a tracking device in it as well and we can monitor her phone calls. If you are going to be involved with her, I want to know what she's up to."

"I understand and thank you, Sweetheart. You take such good care of me. All I ever have to do is ask for something and you make it happen."

"Ana, my priority in life is taking care of you. I could do a hell of a lot better job of if, if you would cooperate occasionally."

"Yes, sir. I will make it a priority to return my person to you safely."

"I certainly hope so. I'll miss you."

"I'll miss you too. But hopefully I can get this over with and be back later this evening. Oh, just to let you know, I'm killing two birds and meeting with an author I've been needing to talk to later this afternoon at the office, so don't worry if I go somewhere other than the hospital."

"Damn. You've deviated from the plan already and you aren't even out of Seattle yet. I'll let Taylor know. Just be careful. I have a meeting to get to, but I'll let Taylor explain why you need to be so careful. He can talk to you on the trip down. Take care sweetheart."

"I will. Christian….I love you so much."

"I love you too."

* * *

"Gail, I hope I'll be back this evening. But if I can't, I'll let you know. Christian , I'm not sure about. He may be late what with this thing going on at work." I tell her as I grab my purse. Reynolds has already loaded my bag and has the car running and ready to head to the airport.

"Don't worry about us. I know how Mr. Grey works when he's making one of his big acquisitions. And you be careful. I feel better with Jason going with you, but be careful around these people anyway."

"Good heavens, you and Christian. I'm not going to try to infiltrate the Taliban; I'm going to Sacramento to visit a three year old in a hospital."

"Well, be careful anyway. I'll see you when you get back. And if Mr. Grey decides to entertain those visitors here, I'm all prepared. Just let me know."

"I will Gail. I kissed the kids but they were still asleep. Tell them I'll see them later or call them tonight."

"Will do."

"Oh, I almost forgot my laptop." I run to my office to grab the case that holds it. "I have work to do on the flight. Bye Gail. Hold down the fort."

Waving goodbye I close the car door and we head to Sea-Tac.

As I near the GEH hanger, I see Taylor waiting with the black Audi SUV. We pull up and the plane is fueled and waiting. Stephen welcomes us aboard and I make my way back and take my seat as Reynolds, Cassidy and Taylor get the luggage loaded and get aboard after securing the SUVs in the hanger. Without delay we begin our taxi and get in queue for takeoff.

Taylor is sitting across from me and I know better than to talk to him until we are air born. As big and tough as he is, he hates to fly, though he'd never actually admit it. I catch his eye and give him a reassuring smile and he nods and clears his throat.

As soon as we are aloft, Isla comes back offering beverages and snacks. She brings me my cup of tea and I order a bagel to go with it. Jason orders a coffee and a bagel. I was surprised to see Isla this morning. I knew Christian had hired her as part of the crew, but I haven't flown with her since we went to Houston.

"Jason?"

"Ma'am?"

"Christian isn't here, you can call me Ana. I want to thank you for coming with me. I know it was spur of the moment."

"It's fine. Mr. Grey and I want to make sure you're safe. I'd rather do it myself than leave it to someone else."

"I'll try not to be too much trouble. Honestly Mr. Grey treats me like I'm ten years old sometimes."

"He's just a bit over protective. He couldn't bear to lose you, Ma'am…Ana."

I feel myself blush and give him a timid smile, "Yes. I know." I drag the bag through my tea as Isala brings our toasted bagels a Jason's coffee. "Jason, Christian said something about you explaining to me why we needed to be so careful."

"Ahm. Yes. Well, Mrs. Grey, you know with Mr. Grey's resources, you and the children, as well as the rest of his family, are always a target for kidnap."

"Yes. I know that, Jason."

"Well, we know nothing of this girl or who her acquaintances are. You could be walking into a set up. We need to make sure that doesn't happen."

"So that's why he doesn't want to me to meet her anywhere but in a public place?"

"Yes ma'am. And we have limited the options to the hospital and now SAP so we can concentrate our resources there. And ma'am…"

"Yes."

"There's also the matter of this latest deal Mr. Grey is working on." I give him an inquisitive look. "There are those that might not be all too happy to see this go successfully."

"Really?"

"Yes, ma'am. I mean, we have no active threats that we are dealing with, but not everyone is in favor of this merger going through. That's why the heightened security of late."

"I see. Mr. Grey didn't mention that. Is there anyone in particular that might not want Mr. Grey to acquire this other company?"

"I don't have specifics that I can discuss, just suffice to say that Mr. Vanderburg owns his company and not everyone in his family is anxious for him to sell to Mr. Grey."

"I see. Thank you Jason. That explains a lot. I'll do my best to be cooperative and function within my given limits this trip."

"Thank you, Mrs. Grey."

"Ana." I remind him.

"Yes. Ana."

"Gail tells me that the two of you enjoy swimming."

"Um, well yes, Ana we do enjoy the water a lot. It's good exercise for Gail. She has arthritis and it's a good way for her to exercise and not stress her joints."

"I didn't know Gail had arthritis, Jason."

"She does. It doesn't bother her all the time, just her knees and hands mostly."

"I'm sorry. I didn't know. Well you and Gail are more than welcome to use the heated swim spa down in the exercise room. The heated water might be good for her."

"Thank you ma'am. I'll let her know."

"You know you are more than welcome to use any of the things in the exercise room. Anytime."

He gives me a nod. Isla comes around to collect the remains of our quick breakfast. "It looks like we are about there. I keep forgetting just what a short flight it is."

When we finally land and taxi to the area where the SUV that Jason has procured. We are quickly loaded into the SUV and are on our way to the hospital as I give Christian a quick text to let him know we arrived safely, although I imagine he already knows that.

* * *

"I need the business office please." I ask at information as I enter the facility specifically designed for children. After finding the business office and signing everything and making sure the current costs are paid, I make my way up to five south to look in on Tommy. Jason is at arm's length and Cassidy and Reynolds not far behind. When I find his room and look in I see a tiny little boy in a hospital bed all alone. He is asleep with his IV pump beeping and oxygen being delivered to him by a little mask. As I walk over to him I can hear the crackles coming from his chest as he tries to breathe. I run my hand over his little dark blond curls and he doesn't wake up. About that time a nurse enters the room to fix the beeping machine.

"Hello. You're here to visit?" she asks.

"Yes. How is he?"

"Okay. I was just surprised to see anyone here. His mom drops in occasionally, but other than that he's by himself. I'm Jenny. I'm his primary nurse. He's usually assigned to me when he comes in."

"Really? Can you tell me about what's going on with him?"

"Well. Are you related to him?"

"I am a friend of his family. I'm covering the cost of the stay here."

She gives me a strange look. "Just a minute. I'll be right back."

She exits and I take his little hand and rub his fingers. He coughs a wet, soupy cough and acts like he wants to cry, but just doesn't have the energy.

"Poor little guy." Jason says as he looks at the sickly boy.

"Tommy?" I whisper. "How are you sweetie?" He doesn't seem to register any recognition. "Tommy remember me? I bought you lunch and ice cream a couple of weeks ago."

He looks at me and gives a little nod, then tries to cough again. I run my hand over his chest to quiet him. "It's okay sweetie. Just rest. I'll sit here with you for a while."

Not long after, the nurse returns to his room." I checked and since you are the payer, I can talk to you about him. I just had to make sure. All the privacy issues, you know."

"I understand. Can you tell me what's going on, Jenny? How is he?"

"He's a pretty sick little guy. But it's not his first time. He's a frequent flyer here."

"Frequent flyer?"

"Yes. We see him several times a year. Usually pneumonia, croup, bronchitis; always something respiratory. From what I understand and what we've seen, his mom is not very well prepared to take care of him. She's young and well…do you know her?"

"It's a strange story. I only know her briefly."

"Want to come down to the break room and we can talk?" She offers.

"Sure. Jason?" He nods and follows us down to an area where we can talk freely.

"Have a seat Mrs. Grey. " She sits across from me as we fix a cup of really bad hospital coffee.

"Tommy isn't new to us. He comes in several times a year, like I said it's always respiratory until this time."

"What's different this time?" I ask.

"Well, let me give you a little back ground. He has asthma. He requires certain medications on a daily basis and regular doctor visits to keep on top of it. He doesn't get it. He doesn't live in a place that is very conducive to keeping his asthma under control. When he does get ill and is here, his mother visits sporadically at best.

"She appears to love him. I just think she's ill equipped to take care of him. I think she has things going on in her life that make it impossible for her to give him the care and attention that he needs. He's such a sweet little boy. He's always so grateful for anything we do for him. When he gets to feeling better, he eats like a little pig. He always comes in underweight and we try to get him built back up before he is discharged."

"His mother told me that the state may take custody of him. Is that true?"

"Yes. This time, they may do it. We have to report his condition to the state when he comes in and they come out to investigate, but his mother always manages to get her act together just long enough to get them to release him to her."

"So you think they'll let her take him home?"

"I don't know. This time is different. This time it's not just pneumonia. This time there are bruises and an old fracture."

My heart sinks and my stomach churns when I hear that. "I can't believe that. Do you know what happened to him?"

"We aren't sure. It looks like he's had some pretty rough handling. You can see bruises from fingers on his arms where he has been held pretty forcefully. And there are some on his back. Probably he was hit by someone. It's hard to tell and his mother just says she doesn't know how they got there. My guess is it was her or one of her acquaintances. "

"You think she could have hit him?" I'm so disappointed in Lorna.

"It's possible. I think she loves him, but you know when she's high or especially when she's not and needs to be, I'm sure it's not hard for her to lose her temper with him. When all you want is another hit, a three year old can be an aggravation that's hard to deal with."

"I see. Actually that's why I'm here. I don't really know them well. I found Tommy on the street one day and then met Lorna. She was asking for money to feed him. Rather than give her cash I took them to eat. Tommy looked like he was pretty hungry. I just fell in love with him. He was so sweet. I gave her my card and told her to call me if he ever needed anything. She called yesterday and so I'm here to try to talk her into getting some help. My husband and I would like to get her to the point that she can take care of Tommy. We want to help her get clean and give her a fresh start. I'm here to try to talk her into going to rehab."

"Well I wish you luck with that. Right now she wants drugs more than she wants Tommy. And going to rehab isn't a miracle cure. The last statistics I heard were that five percent stay clean for thirty days. Of those five percent, five percent will make it a year and of those, five percent will make it five years. Sometimes it takes going through rehab multiple times for it to finally work. Not real encouraging. But if she'll go, I think it would be the best thing that could happen for him. I need to check on him again.

We stand to go back to his room. "Are all these guys with you?" she gestures to Jason and Reynolds and Cassidy.

"Yes. I'm sorry. It's hard to explain. We won't get in the way."

Once back in his room she checks his IV and his fluids. "Mrs. Grey?" she looks up at me and lifts his little gown. Suddenly the red, black and purple marks on his arms back and chest become visible to me. I can't bear to look at them and I see Jason look away and tense his jaw.

I want to cry for him. "I'm going to stay for a while if that's alright. I have a meeting later this afternoon, but I'll be back after that."

"That's fine. He could use someone to be with him." She smiles and walks out of the room.

"Oh, Jason. Doesn't he just break your heart?" I whisper, trying not to wake him.

"Yes, ma'am. Makes me want to call Sophie."

"I'm going outside to call Lorna and then I want to sit with him a while before I go to SAP to meet with this author."

I walk to the atrium and grab my phone and call the number the hospital has given me to contact Lorna.

"Yeah. Who is it?"

"I'm trying to reach Lorna Blakely."

"You got her. What you need?" I hear a groggy voice on the other end.

"Lorna, this is Ana Grey."

"Oh, yeah. What's going on? I mean I got your message, I just couldn't call back."

"Well. Lorna, I'm in Sacramento. In fact I'm at the hospital now. I'd like for you to come down here and talk to me about Tommy."

"Um. Right now?"

"Well, I have a meeting a little later and then I plan to come back here. Can you meet me here at the hospital around three?"

"Um. I got no way to get there. Can you meet me somewhere closer?"

"Lorna, I really need to meet with you here at the hospital."

"Well, I can't get there. Can't you come here?"

I remember my promise to Christian and I will not go back on my word. "No Lorna. My husband and I want to help you and Tommy. I want to discuss it with you and I need for you to come here to talk to me. Will you do it?"

"Uhh. I'll try. Look how long are you going to be here?"

"I was planning on returning to Seattle tonight, but I can stay over if I need to."

"Can I meet you at that hotel you were staying at? That's walking distance. I can meet you there later."

I put the phone to my chest to mute it. "Jason. Would it be okay to meet Lorna at the hotel instead of here? She has no way to get here today."

"I think so ma'am. As long as we don't go meet her in some out of the way place. I can make arrangements for it."

"Okay, Lorna. I can meet you at the hotel. What time can you be there?"

"Sometime after dark. I guess about eight o'clock."

"Good. Go to the desk and ask for me. They'll call up and let me know you're there."

"Okay. I'll see you later then."

"Lorna?"

"Yes."

"Show up. Please."

"I will."

After sitting with Tommy for a while, I head for SAP with my entourage and meet with this author that is refusing to rework her book. I have to discuss with her the option of letting us help her with this or letting her go elsewhere. I'd hate to lose the book, but right now it's a holy mess. Luckily she gets on board and we agree to stay in touch and work together on getting this ready to publish. Then I return to the hospital for a few hours to be with Tommy. He's still so pitiful looking.

It's hard to tear myself away from him, but I need to get back to meet with Lorna. I hope she bothers to show up.

After we are back and checked in at the hotel, Reynolds and Cassidy are positioned in the hall outside the suite. Taylor has checked my suite and is here with me. It's a two room suite and he has the other room. This is pretty ridiculous. If it were any man but Taylor, Christian would be here with a vengeance. Eight o'clock comes and goes. I'm going to be so pissed if she doesn't show up. Finally I get a call from the desk letting me know she's here and alone. Within a few minutes she is at the door to the suite and flanked by Reynolds and Cassidy.

"Lorna. Come in. I'm glad you made it." I look at my two body guards, "Thank you. We'll be fine."

"Have a seat. Have you had dinner? Would you like for me to order something up for you?" I ask her.

"Um. Are you gonna' eat?"

"I can eat. Do you want something sweetie?"

"Maybe a sandwich and a drink?"

"Sure any particular kind?"

"Doesn't matter."

"Jason, would you order up two club sandwiches with fries and two soft drinks and whatever you want. And check with the other two and see what they want."

"Yes, M'am." Jason steps out of the door a moment to talk to Cassidy and Reynolds."

"Lorna, don't pay any attention to Jason. He is a security guard and I'm afraid he will have to stay with us while we talk. But he doesn't really listen to what we're saying." Of course I'm lying. He doesn't miss a thing.

"Okay. How was Tommy? You said you went to the hospital?"

"Yes. He's holding his own, but he's still a sick little boy. I'll make sure he gets what he needs. How long since you've been to see him?"

"I was able to go day before yesterday. It's just so hard for me to get anywhere. I have to take a bus and that costs money."

"I see. Well, the reason I wanted to talk with you Lorna is, my husband and I would like to help."

"Help? Help me what? And why?"

"Look I won't beat around the bush. Lorna, it's pretty evident that you want to make sure Tommy is taken care of, but you aren't able to do it, at least not like you should." I just keep thinking about those bruises and I want to shake her. But that won't get us anywhere.

"Okay. I know that. But I try. I do the best I can."

"Sweetheart. I need you to be honest with me. Are you involved with drugs of any sort?"

"Fuck no. Why would you ask me that?"

"Because, I believe you are. Look, I'm not good at this. I really don't understand it all. I just know that you are in to something so deep that it prevents you from doing your best for Tommy and for yourself. We want to help you. My husband and I want to help get you out of this. Get you away from it, so you can do better for yourself."

"Like what?"

"We want to get you into a rehab facility. We want to help you get clean and then help you get set up in a new place, help you finish school and get a good job." Walking over to her I sit down next to her on the sofa. "Lorna, honey, I want to help you. I want to see you have a happy healthy life. I want to see you and Tommy living in a good, clean safe place. Sweetheart, you can't be happy living like this."

"I'm good. I don't need nothing. Tommy and me, we're fine. We don't need any help."

"Lorna, you can't even go see him in the hospital. You can't get him medicine or feed him. They are on the verge of taking him away from you. I want to help you keep him. But to do that you are going to have to make an effort to straighten up." I push her hair off of her face. " Is that something you'd want to do? If it is, we want to help you do it."

"Why. What's in it for you and this husband of yours?"

"Lorna, my husband helps people all over the world. When he was a little boy, he was sort of in the same position Tommy is. His mother ended up dying. We don't want to see that happen to you and Tommy. I like you and I like Tommy and I want to make it better for both of you. I'm in the position to do it, if you'll let me."

"I don't know. I can't really go no place right now."

"Why sweetie?"

"I just can't. I got obligations, you know?"

"Lorna, if you agree to let us help you, I can put you on a private plane right now and get you away from all of this. No one will know where you are. You'll get the help you need."

"I gotta' think about it. I'm not sure."

"Lorna, what happened to Tommy?"

"What? He got pneumonia."

"Sweetie, you know what I mean. How did he get all those bruises on him?"

"I don't know. Look I gotta' go. I been here too long already." She stands to leave.

"Will you call me? Please. Oh, wait." I grab the phone Christian sent with Taylor to give to her. "Here. This is a phone for you. Do not give it to anyone else. It is paid for. I want you to have it so you can call me and I can call you. But I mean it. Don't give it away."

"Thanks. I won't."

"Lorna. I have to leave tomorrow, but I can be back here in a couple of hours if you need me. I've taken care of all of Tommy's expenses, so don't worry about that."

She nods, "Wow. You must be rich."

"We do okay. Just please think about letting us help."

" I will. I'll let you know. But I gotta' to go right now."

"Okay. But you haven't eaten yet."

"I'll eat later. I gotta' go."

She gets up and walks to the door opening it. "Lorna. Take care of yourself. Please."

"I will. Look I'll think about it and I'll call." With that she walks out and disappears down the hall.


	51. Chapter 51

_**Fifty Shades…Full Circle**_

_**Chapter 51**_

"Are you okay ma'am?" Jason asks.

"Yes. Thank you."

"I guess I could have hogtied her and thrown her on the plane."

"I wish." I say with a little snort. " She has to want this or it won't work. I'm going to my room and call Mr. Grey. Will you let me know when the sandwiches get here, please?"

"Yes, ma'am."

Walking into my room I grab my phone from my purse and sit down on the bed.

"Call Christian."

"Ana?" he picks up on the first ring.

"Yes. Hi Sweetheart. How did your day go?" Why does the sound of his voice still make me melt after eight years?

"Well, It's not over yet."

"Christian. You're still at work?"

"Yeah. Hell of a lot to do before Thursday. Meetings all day with finance, marketing, PR, legal. I want everything in place and no fuck ups."

"Sweetheart. I'm so sorry. I know you must be worn out."

"Forget me. How are you? I've gotten your texts today. I've been fucking dying to talk to you."

"I'm okay. It's just been a long hard day. I sat with Tommy most of the afternoon, other than the time I was at SAP. Oh, I talked that author into staying with us. I think this could be a really good book."

"That's great Sweetheart. Have you met with the girl yet?"

"Yes. She just left actually. And her name is Lorna."

"Right. How did it go?"

"She wants to think about our offer. I told her I had to leave tomorrow, but she could call me and I'd come back and get her."

"Oh, so you won't be back this evening?" He sounds so dejected.

"I want to, but I'm hoping Lorna will call me and agree to our offer. I want to give her one more day."

"And the boy?"

"He's sick, Christian. He has pneumonia and ….he's hanging in there."

"And what?"

"Nothing, he's just so little and sick and alone."

"The girl isn't with him?"

"Not much according to the nurses. When I talked to her, she said she doesn't have the money to go see him very frequently."

"You gave her money?"

"No. You will be proud of me, Mr. Grey. I did not give her money. And I stuck to the plan."

"Baby, I'm always proud of you."

"Don't start. I miss you enough as it is."

"Me too. "

"Christian what do I do if Lorna agrees to rehab?"

"I talked briefly to Flynn. He has recommended a facility here in Seattle that will take her and they have a place for the child too. As soon as she agrees, just get her on the plane and back here before she can change her mind."

"What if Tommy isn't ready to leave the hospital yet?"

"She can give permission for you to take him when he is ready to leave. I can have legal draw up the papers and then get her to sign them in front of a notary. You can go get him and bring him back to Seattle. I'm sure Mom will be glad to look after his medical care while he's here."

"Okay. I'm always in awe of you. You always have a solution for everything?"

"It just takes a bit of looking ahead and planning. If I didn't I wouldn't be in business long."

"How are the kids? I got busy and didn't get to call them before bedtime."

"They're fine. I just talked to Gail a while ago. They were fed and getting into their pajamas."

"I miss them. I miss you." I can feel the tears welling in my eyes. "I miss you so much. I want to be there with you."

I can hear him sigh, "I miss you too, baby. And don't cry."

"I'm not crying."

"Ana? I know you better than that."

"I can't get anything past you, can I?"

"No. You can't. I'll see you tomorrow, Baby."

"See you tomorrow?"

"Ana, be careful. I need you."

"I will, Christian. I love you."

"Me too, baby. Ros is calling me. I gotta' run. Love you."

I feel so bad. He is working so hard and I'm here in Sacramento instead of there in Seattle helping him. Hearing Jason's knock and I walk back out to the adjoining parlor to see our food has arrived. Jason and I actually sit down and eat together. Mostly we just eat in silence. I think it has been a very trying day.

* * *

Throwing my tea down, I grab a piece of toast as Jason enters the adjoining parlor. "The car is hear, Mrs….uh Ana."

"Thanks. Have you had any breakfast?" I ask him.

"Yes, ma'am. Reynolds, Cassidy and I ate together and coordinated plans for the day. My understanding is there are no stops other than the hospital and then the trip back this afternoon. Unless the girl decides to return with us."

I take a quick bite of toast. "Yes. I think that's it. I hope I hear from her. I'd really like to get her back to Seattle as soon as possible."

"Yes. Ma'am. The car is ready whenever you are."

After a short trip back to the hospital, I find myself once again in the room with Tommy. The doctors have already looked at him and written their orders. He's improving, but not near ready to leave the hospital. I get there in time to try to feed him some breakfast. His tray comes and I try to get a little oatmeal and some jello and juice down him. He eats a little and then just wants to go back to sleep. Poor little thing, he just keeps asking for his mother. If I knew where she was I'd have Reynolds go pick her up and drag her back here. I rub his back like I do for Grace and he seems to quiet. It almost hurts to listen to him try to breath.

About eleven the social worker from the state comes to visit him. We talk and I explain what Christian and I are trying to do and how we are trying to help. Finally she agrees that if Lorna will go to rehab and if Christian and I will sign to be responsible for Tommy along with Lorna, they'll release him. Of course, I agree to sign anything they want. Personally I think they are glad not to have to take him into custody. I don't care. Anything I can do to help him, I want to do it.

Taylor and I go down to the cafeteria and try to eat some lunch. It's barely edible, but it's okay, because I'm not too hungry. On the way back to Tommy's room, I stop to try to reach Lorna one more time.

"Yeah."

"Lorna? This is Ana Grey."

"Yeah. I'm here."

"Lorna. Have you thought about what we discussed?"

"Yeah. I been thinkin' about it. I just need more time. I can't decide nothin' like that so quick."

"Lorna. The social worker from the state visited this morning. I talked to her and they'll agree to release Tommy to you if you go to rehab. I told her that my husband and I will sign to be responsible for both of you. Do you understand? If you go to rehab, you get to keep Tommy. If you don't, Lorna, they are going to take him."

"I uh. I hear what you're sayin'. So does your husband agree to all of this?"

"Yes. Lorna, he will agree to it."

"Wow. He must be somethin' special to do all of this."

"Yes, Lorna, he's something pretty special. He really cares. He wants to help too. So will you come back to Seattle with me?"

"Um..I can't right now. Maybe in a few days. Can I think about it for a few more days?"

"Lorna? What is there to think about? I'm offering you a chance at a new life, a better life. And a chance to keep Tommy."

"I can't give you an answer now."

"Okay. Look I have to go back today, but if you change your mind, call me. I can be here in two hours to get both of you. Do you understand me?"

"Yeah. Yeah. Look I'll call. I promise. I just need to work some things out, okay?"

"Okay. Lorna, please think about it and do it for Tommy."

"Okay. Bye."

She hangs up and I get a sinking feeling in my stomach. I don't want to fly back to Seattle without them. At least I know Tommy will be safe here. The social worker won't let Lorna take him out of the hospital. I talked to her and told her that if Lorna doesn't cooperate and go to rehab, then Christian and I want to be his foster parents. She advised me that it would be difficult since we are not residents of California. Surely Christian can work something out. I can't let him go to an orphanage or foster care.

Walking back into Tommy's room he is awake again. He is crying and coughing.

"Oh, hey sweetie. How are you?"

He just looks at me as his tears fall and he sniffles. "Mama?"

"Baby, Mama isn't here right now. Can I do anything?"

"Want mama. Pees get mama."

I sit on the bed next to him and pull him in my lap to cradle him. "Sweetheart, please don't cry. Mama will be here soon." His crying just makes him cough. As I cradle him in my lap I rock him and kiss his forehead. His hair is sopping from his fever and from crying. "Hush, Sweetheart. I won't let anything happen to you ever gain. I promise."

I rock him like I do Grace and run my hand through his hair trying to sooth him. He coughs and coughs, almost choking at times. Taylor hands me a box of tissues and I wipe his nose and his face. I ask Taylor to dampen a washcloth and he hands me a cool, wrung out washcloth. I glide the cloth over his little face trying to wash away the perspiration, tears and clean his runny nose. Finally he quiets and stops crying. I continue to rock him as his eyes lose their battle to stay open. Gently placing him back on the bed I cover him up, making sure he stays asleep.

"Oh, Jason. I don't know what to do. I hate to leave him alone like this, but I need to get back. I promised Christian I would. This thing he's working on is big and I want to be there to help him, even if all I can do is support him."

We continue to watch the sleeping child, like he will disappear if we look away. "I know Ma'am. It's hard to know what to do."

"I said I'd be home and I won't break my promise to Christian. I'll stay as late as I can and then fly back this evening."

"Yes, ma'am. I'll let Stephen know."

"Thanks, Jason." I give him a half- hearted smile and lean my shoulder against his.

Spending the entire day with Tommy, I have given him a sponge bath and changed his little hospital gown trying to clean him up. My heart breaks and I can't help but tear up when I see the marks on his little body. _How does this happen? Why does it happen? I just know I can't ever let it happen again._ When I try to get some lunch and dinner down him, he doesn't eat much, but he does take most of the broth and some juice. I've watched as he has endured three breathing treatments, which made him cough violently. After dinner, I read to him until he goes to sleep.

"It's almost 8:30, Jason. I guess we need to go. Lorna hasn't called and I doubt she will now."

"Yes, ma'am. I'll let Stephen know we'll be there within the hour. Are you close enough for me to have Reynolds bring the car around?"

"I think so. I hate to leave him Jason, but I need to get back to Christian and the kids."

"Yes, ma'am."

I reach over and run my hand through the sleeping child's curls and kiss his forehead. "Sweetheart, I'll be back. I hope I can get your Mama to come to Seattle so we can help both of you. If she doesn't, I won't let you go to a foster home. I'll make sure you are taken care of. You rest and get better. No matter what happens, I'll take care of you. No one will ever hurt you again, Tommy."

Before leaving, I make sure the nurse's station has my contact information; my home number, cell number, work number even Christian's number, just in case. I don't want Tommy leaving this hospital with Lorna. Jason, lets me know that the car is ready. I hate to leave.

"Mrs. Grey. I know it's difficult. I can hire security personnel to put here, so he can't leave without us knowing. Would that make you feel better?"

"Yes. That's a good idea. But instead I'll make arrangements for a sitter to be with him, so he won't be alone until I can get back. And she can keep an eye on him." Checking at the nurse's station, I get a list of nursing students that do part time work as sitters in the hospital. I'll start calling tomorrow and hire one to stay with Tommy. I don't want him to be alone.

"Good idea ma'am." He extends his arm to me. "Mrs. Grey. We need to go."

After landing back in Seattle, we make the trip to the house. When I get there, I have Jason go on back to his house and Gail. I'm sure she's waiting for him. When I enter our home, it's a tomb like, dark and quiet; the only illumination coming from a lamp in the foyer. I check Christian's office and it's dark. I hope he isn't still at the office. I feel so guilty not being here for him. Evidently this acquisition is very important. I just feel so bad that he didn't tell me about it sooner. I'm sure it's been in the works longer than just a week. More like a year probably. Exhausted, I turn out the light and climb the stairs. On my way to our bedroom, I stop and kiss Grace and pull her covers up. Then I make a stop to check on Teddy. I kiss my beautiful boy and am grateful that both of my children are safe.

Finally, I open the door to the room I share with my sweet Christian. It's bathed in darkness. As I start to flip on a light, my eyes adjust and I notice that Christian is in bed asleep. He is on his side of the bed facing away from me. Not wanting to wake him, I quietly slip into my dressing room and slide out of my clothes and into a gown. In the bathroom I quickly take off my makeup, brush my teeth and take a brush to my hair.

When I walk back out into the bedroom, I'm relieved to see Christian still asleep. I gently lift the covers on my side and slide in next to him. I need to touch him, so I snuggle next to his back spooning him. He isn't wearing a T-shirt and I bury my head between his shoulder blades taking in his scent and kissing his warm skin as I wrap my arms around his chest.

He stirs and takes one of my hands bringing it to his lips kissing it. He turns over to face me, wrapping me in his arms. I could live in these arms.

"You're home." He gives me a groggy smile and pulls me to him.

"Yes. I said I'd be back by Thursday and I'm a woman of my word. Besides, I couldn't stay away from you one more day."

"I'm glad. I missed you terribly."

"Me too." I give him a smile and push the hair off of his forehead. "I love you, Christian."

"Did she come back with you?" he asks as he tries to keep his eyes open.

"No. I didn't hear any more from her. Christian why didn't you tell me about this deal with Vanderburg?"

"Not much to tell. Just another business deal, Baby." He bends his head down until our foreheads touch.

"Christian, Jason, told me that not everyone is happy about you purchasing the company from him. And there could be some trouble."

He sweetly kisses my nose, "Nothing to worry about. I just want to be careful until all of this is settled."

"Christian I know this just didn't come up this week."

"No. It's been in the works for quite some time."

"Why didn't you tell me about it? You know I like to know what is going on, especially something that means this much to you."

He strokes my hair, "Okay, what do you want to know?"

"I want to know what is going on."

"Well…I had been looking at this company for several years. Their holdings are very much in line with ours and I knew it would be a very compatible acquisition. In fact, Harold Vanderburg had approached me several times over the years about selling to him."

"You'd never do that, would you?"

"Out of the question. Anyway, I got wind that he might be open to selling last year. I approached him and got first refusal if he did decide to sell."

"But you didn't refuse."

"No. I've been hammering out an offer for some time now. And it looks like we have a deal."

"But Jason said something about not everyone being in favor of it."

"Harold owns the majority of the shares of the company. He has two sons. They along with his wife each hold an equal share of the remaining shares. His sons are both board members and hold positions in the company. They are not in favor of the sale, because they would not only be out of a job if the company is sold, they couldn't inherit it when Vanderburg dies."

"So how did you convince them to sell?"

"Since Harold holds the majority all he has to do is agree and it's a done deal. His wife is in favor as well. I finally agreed to keep his sons on for a minimum of 2 years in comparable positions with my company. At their present salaries of course. Once that was done and Mrs. Vanderburg was satisfied that her sons would be gainfully employed, they agreed to sell."

"But can you get along with his sons if they resent you buying the company?"

"I don't have to get along with them. All I have to do is pay them a salary for two years and keep them from doing any damage and then I can cut them loose. Besides, they'll make enough money off of the sale to keep them out of the poor house."

I pull away and sit up pulling my knees to my chest and begin to cry. Christian rubs his hand over my back. "Baby, what is it?"

"I just wish you'd tell me about these things. I want to be able to help you. I'm your wife. I want to be a part of these things. I want to…."

Christian sits up and wraps me in his arms kissing my hair. "Hey. Don't cry. I guess it just sort of evolved over time and I never thought about telling you. I didn't mean to keep you in the dark."

"I just want to be there for you. I want to help you. I want to support you."

"Baby, you do help and support me. Please don't get upset."

"I guess, I'm just stressed out. It hasn't been a pleasant two days."

"Tell me about it, Baby. What happened?" he strokes my hair and kisses my head.

"Oh, Christian. Tommy looked so pitiful. He's so sick. And Lorna….I can't figure her out. I know she cares about him, but..but…" I just break down again.

"Hey, hey," he coos to me as he strokes my hair.

"Christian… he was covered in bruises. His little body was covered in black and blue marks."

I can feel him tense and pull me tighter. " Oh, Baby. I'm sorry you had to see that."

"Christian, it's not me. I'm fine. It's Tommy. A little boy shouldn't have to endure that."

"No baby. A little boy shouldn't have to endure that. We'll make sure it doesn't happen again."

"I'm sorry. I know this is something you don't need to deal with right now. I'll take care of it."

"Hey, this marriage stuff works both ways. If you're going to help and support me, then I'm going to help and support you. At least I think that's how it works." He snorts against my cheek as he rubs my back.

"Yep. I believe you're right. I just don't want this to be difficult for you. Tommy seems to be going through so much….." I can't help but begin to cry again.

"So much of what I went through?"

I nod. "Yes. I didn't know this was happening. I just thought they were poor and needed help. I had no idea about the rest."

"Baby, the girl is an addict. It doesn't matter how much she loves the kid, she loves the stuff more. Until that changes, it's going to continue."

"No. I won't let her hurt him again. I know she needs help, but until she gets it, I can't let Tommy take the brunt of it."

He pulls me back into his arms. "Oh, Ana. My sweet, sweet girl. Do you know how much I love you?"

"I hope it's as much as I love you."

"Don't ever for one second doubt that it isn't."


	52. Chapter 52

_**Fifty Shades…Full Circle**_

_**Chapter 52**_

"I never doubt how much you love me." I look up at him and he bends his head down until his lips brush against mine. Turning in to him I wrap my arms around his neck as he circles his around my waist. His kiss deepens against my lips and our tongues begin their familiar dance as he lays me back on our bed; his need for me obvious as it presses hard against my thigh. His hair knots in my hands, and I break our kiss enough to whisper against his lips, "I need you. I need you so much."

"I'm here, baby. I'm always here." Before I can think we've begun to sate our need. His breath cascades warm and moist against my skin as he props on his elbows and crawls between my welcoming thighs. We gasp in unison as he gently fills me trying to quench our longing to be close. Tonight is not about physical desire or sexual prowess. Tonight is about being close, about needing and loving and cementing the bond between us.

My surrendering climax is first and then I feel him bare himself to me, offering himself to me completely. As his head falls to rest in the crook of my neck, he catches his breath. My emotions are so raw and my need for him so intense, that tears seep from my eyes and trail down my temple wetting his resting face. Without saying a word he props over me and bathes my face with kisses capturing each tear as it escapes. As he rolls off and lies beside me pulling me into his arms, his hair prickles against my skin as I bury my face in his chest. "Go ahead and cry it out baby. I'm here. I'll always be here," is whispered to me as I sink into his arms.

* * *

When the sun filters through our bedroom window coloring our private world, my eyes flutter awake.

"Good morning sleeping beauty." Christian gives me a beautiful good morning smile as he walks over to sit on the bed next to me finishing tying his navy tie.

"What time is it?" I ask as I pull my hands over my head and arch my back into stretch and a yawn.

"Almost eight."

Quickly abandoning my leisurely awakening I sit up, "Why didn't you wake me?"

"Because I love to watch you sleep. Besides you're a bear if you don't get your beauty sleep." He sweetly plants a kiss on my nose. "But a beautiful bear."

Reaching up I straighten his tie and adjust his collar. "There. Better."

"Thanks. I 'd rather see my reflection in you than in the mirror."

"You're such a sweet talker for this time of morning." I smile at him. "Christian. What time will the Vanderbergs be here?"

"I think their plane gets in around nine this morning. Why?"

"Will Mr. Vanderberg be with you at the office today?"

"Yes. We've got work to do and contracts to go over."

"Okay. I'll call Mrs. Vanderberg and ask her to lunch. "

"Great. I think the wives of the two boys are coming also."

"I'll invite them too. Maybe I can win them over with a really decadent luncheon."

"You never cease to amaze me, Mrs. Grey." He smiles over at me as he snaps his watch on his wrist and grabs his beige worsted wool suit jacket.

"Good. Is dinner tonight or tomorrow night?"

"Tomorrow. Oh, can you come with me to the office tomorrow?" he asks.

"I guess. Why?"

"I want you to be there when we sign everything." He strokes my cheek as he bends to look into my eyes.

I reach up and tug on his tie pulling his face to me, "This really is important to you isn't it?"

"Yes, it is. And I want my best girl with me when it happens." He gives me a quick chaste kiss on my lips.

"Well, your best girl wants to be with you."

"Walk me down?" he asks as he stands up and offers his hand.

"Of course." I get out of bed and slide into my robe as we walk to the bedroom door. Snaking my arm around his waist, I stop for a moment.

"What is it?" he asks looking down at me.

I put both arms around his waist and pull him close. " Nothing. I just adore you."

He looks down into my eyes, "God what did I ever do to deserve you?"

"We just got lucky, Christian. We both just got very lucky."

Once Christian is out the door, I grab my tea and start to call the names on the list of sitters, I got at the hospital. I luck out and find one that will work with another girl on the list to trade off shifts, while they attend classes. Getting their information I make arrangements to get their paychecks to them, as well a generous donation toward their tuition. They don't know that yet.

Next I call Andrea and get contact and hotel information for the Vanderbergs.

"Hi Andrea. It's Mrs. Grey. Can you get me the contact information for Margaret Vanderberg?"

"Sure thing. Hold on just a second and I'll pull it up." As I wait I can hear the efficient tapping of the keys on Andrea's keyboard. "Here we go. I made reservations at the Four Seasons on Union. Do you want the number there or her cell?"

"Give me both, just in case."

"Okay her cell is 412-555-9413. And the Four Seasons is 749-4000. Mr. and Mrs. Vanderberg are in the Presidential Suite and the sons are in the Governor's and Deluxe Elliott Bay Suites respectively. Can I do anything for you, Mrs. Grey?"

"Have they arrived? Is Mr. Vanderberg at the office with Mr. Grey?"

"Yes, ma'am. He arrived about forty five minutes ago. He and Mr. Grey are having brunch alone in the dining room."

"Okay. Thanks."

"Anything else?"

"Oh, no thank you. I just wanted to contact Mrs. Vanderberg. Thanks Andrea."

"No problem, Mrs. Grey. Good morning."

I dial the Four Seasons asking for the Presidential Suite and hear a soft voice answer.

"Hello?"

"May I please speak with Margaret Vanderberg?"

"This is Mrs. Vanderberg."

"Mrs. Vanderberg, this is Anastasia Grey. Christian's wife."

"Oh, yes. Mrs. Grey."

"I was calling to make sure you arrived safely and that your accommodations were satisfactory."

"Yes. Thank you, Mrs. Grey. The suite is lovely."

"Good. I was wondering if you would join me for lunch today. Unless you have other plans, of course."

"No. No plans. I'd love to. I think it would be nice if we got to know each other."

"Wonderful. I understand that your daughters-in-law have accompanied you. I'd like to invite them as well."

"Thank you, but would it be possible for us to luncheon alone?"

"Of course. Absolutely. I'll collect you about one, if that's convenient."

"That will be fine. I look forward to meeting you Mrs. Grey."

"Thank you and please call me Ana. I look forward to meeting you as well."

"Until one."

"I'll see you then."

Hmm. Wonder why she wants to come alone. Maybe they don't get along. Oh well, this should make it easier.

"Gail?" I wander into the laundry room looking for her. "There you are. Why isn't Myra doing the laundry?"

"Oh, I'm just taking care of the kid's clothes. I prefer it that way. I like to keep up with what is stained or worn out and needs to be replaced."

"Oh. Thanks. Um, has Neimen's sent over my new dress yet? It was being altered and I'll need it for Saturday night."

"No. I haven't seen it. I'll let you know as soon as it arrives."

"Okay. I'm sure it will be here. I just don't like to wait until the last minute."

"Is it pretty?" she asks.

"I think so. It's sleeveless with a bateau neck and sort of a shift style. It has gray color blocking with some sequins here and there. I liked it."

"Oh, it sounds pretty."

"Thanks. I've got to take this Margaret Vanderberg out to lunch. I'll probably leave about 12 and be back mid- afternoon."

"Okay. Will you and Mr. Grey be home for dinner?"

"Yes. I believe so. Unless he is running late again."

"Okay. Anything in particular you want?"

"No. Whatever you come up with will be great as always."

After changing into my peach linen wrap dress, I add a short matching cotton sweater with three quarter sleeves and a simple strand of pearls and pearl studs. I add beige kitten heel pumps and gather my hair up into a pony tail. Then I grab my beige bag and get into my A8 to head for town and Mrs. Vanderberg. I want to be able to talk to her, so I have security follow instead of letting them drive me.

I collect her and we head for Capital Grille downtown. We are shown to our table and enjoy champagne cocktail while we wait for our lunch of Lobster and Dungeness Crab Stuffed Shrimp and Seared Swordfish with Lemon Shallot Relish with French Onion soup for starters and Fresh Strawberries Capital Grille for dessert. Things are a bit tense at first as one would expect for two people who don't know each other. Soon, after the champagne cocktails, we are effortlessly in conversation. Margaret Vanderberg is easily thirty years older than I am with grown children and grandchildren. But we have our husbands' businesses in common.

"I'm so glad Harold decided to sell to Christian, Ana."

"Why is that, Margaret…er..Maggie?"

"Harold has admired him for years. They really have a lot in common, both building their companies from the ground up. Both of them are focused on renewable energy and philanthropic interests."

"Christian really does all he can in those areas."

"Yes. And I understand that Christian came from humble beginnings just as Harold did."

"You might say that. He was adopted at a very young age by the Greys. His original circumstances were not the best, but his adoptive parents were an attorney and a pediatrician. They gave him a good home, love and the best education possible."

"Harold has admired Christian's values and his business acumen. Christian is a very savvy business man, yet he is honest and ethical in his business dealings, at least according to Harold." She chuckles.

"Thank you, Maggie. I think that's one thing I love about him. He's nothing, if not honest in every aspect of his life."

"How many children do you have?"

"We have two. A boy. Theodore who is seven and our daughter Grace is three."

"I remember when ours were that age. You have a lot ahead of you. But I wouldn't trade the experience for anything. Now I get to dote on our grandchildren."

"I think we are looking forward to grandchildren. Not any time soon though."

"You and your husband have a good marriage."

I sigh and look out the window, "Yes. We do. We have our ups and downs and misunderstandings, but we are very much committed to one another." I smile over at her.

"Good." She smiles over at me. "Harold admires that. I can't tell you how many business acquaintances of ours are on their second and third marriages or have a mistress stashed somewhere." She shakes her head. "Harold doesn't approve of that." She leans in and whispers.

"You and Harold have been married for a long time." I mention.

"Yes. Almost forty years." She smiles. "I can't say there haven't been times that someone tried to tempt him, but he was always able to turn his back and come home to me."

"That's admirable. I feel the same about Christian. He does love me. I have never doubted that for a moment. Would you like to see Grey House?"

"Yes. That would be lovely."

We finish up our lunch and slice back into the A8 after the valet brings it around. Then we are off to the high rise that is my husband's sandstone and glass temple. After dropping the car with the valet we enter the building to a rash of 'Good afternoon Mrs. Grey, How are you Mrs. Grey? What can I do for you Mrs. Grey?'. As we get off on the twentieth floor we are greeted by Andrea. "Good afternoon Mrs. Grey. Is Mr. Grey expecting you?"

"Oh, no Andrea. I just dropped by for a few moments to show Mrs. Vanderberg Grey House." I smile at her. "We'll just roam around for a few minutes and be on our way. Don't bother Mr. Grey."

Maggie and I walk to the large glass wall in the lobby to take in the view of Seattle and the sound."

"Goodness, does Christian have a preference for blondes? They're everywhere."

I have to laugh, "No. Actually he isn't attracted to blondes. That's why they are everywhere."

"Oh, I see. Good for you." She smiles.

"Actually, it was his practice to hire blondes before I met him. He just continues the tradition. I trust him no matter what color their hair is."

"It's not him you have to worry about, if you gather my meaning."

"I do. And he seems pretty much oblivious to other women. I'm sure he's not, but he acts that way for my sake. But I really do trust him."

"Hello pretty lady," I jump when I feel arms snake around my waist. "Andrea told me you were here."

Christian plants a soft kiss on my neck, then releases me to extend his hand to Maggi. "Mrs. Vanderberg, so nice to see you again. I hope you don't mind me sneaking a kiss from my wife. I haven't seen her since this morning."

"Oh, no, Christian. It's so nice to see a happy couple."

"Maggi." An attractive older man in an exquisite navy suit steps from behind Christian.

"Harold." He kisses Maggie on her cheek. " Ana and I just stopped by for a moment to look at Grey House. Please don't let us bother you."

"No. Really Christian. We are only here for a minute. I told Andrea not to bother you." I try to explain away our intrusion.

"You are never a bother. Oh, Ana, this is Harold Vanderberg. Harold, my wife Anastasia."

I extend my hand to him, "Please call me Ana."

"Mrs. Grey. I've heard so much about you. You are as lovely as Christian promised me you were."

I feel my cheeks flush as I lean into Christian.

"Mr. Grey. " We hear coming through the vestibule. "Mr. Grey."

"What is it Olivia?" Christian turns to look at her.

"Mr. Grey. Excuse me, but I just spoke to an acquaintance at the Nooze. Seems Mrs. Grey and Mrs. Vanderberg were snapped coming out of Capitol Grille a few minutes ago."

My hand flies to my mouth, "Oh, Christian. I forgot. I took Maggie to the Grille for lunch. I didn't see any photographers, though."

"It's okay. Someone probably took it with a phone and sent it in." He looks over at Olivia. "If anyone calls for a statement, just tell them we have no comment at this time. I don't want to issue a press release until everything is finalized."

"Yes, sir, Mr. Grey. I'll take care of it. I just wanted you to know."

"Thanks Olivia."

"Christian, I'm so sorry. I know you wanted to keep this under wraps for now." I apologize.

"Don't worry Ana. Christian and I have a verbal agreement and a handshake. We are both men of our word. All that is left is the formal signing tomorrow." Harold reassures me.

"Well Christian. Shall we get back to it and get these transfer details hammered out, so we can both get back to our wives this evening?" Harold asks.

"Sure Harold. Maggie, lovely to see you again. I look forward to our dinner tomorrow night."

"Good to see you again Christian."

Christian rubs his hands down my upper arms and then pulls me to him, kissing my forehead. "I won't be late, Sweetheart."

"Ana, pleasure to finally meet you. Until tomorrow." Harold bids me good bye.

"Thank you Harold. It was nice to meet you. You two don't work too hard." I say as they turn to go back to their wheeling and dealing.

With that Christian and Harold disappear back into his office and Maggi and I head back down to the car. "Maggi, why is Harold selling the company? Christian said he has been trying to buy it for years and Harold wasn't interested in selling. Why now?"

"Oh, I just think the time has come. Harold and I have worked so hard for so long. I think we want to just enjoy ourselves. Spend more time together." She smiles over at me. "I think it's just not as fun as it used to be for him."

"What about the boys. Why not hand it over it them?" I ask.

" Harold seems to think he has handed too much over to them already. I think he would enjoy seeing the boys forge their own way in the world. Besides, they'll have enough money from this sale to never have to work a day in their lives if they choose not to."

"Oh, I was under the impression that you didn't want to see them unemployed."

"Well I'd rather they work than just sit back on their inheritance. But Harold finally convinced me that this was best for everybody." She reassures me. "They aren't any too happy about the sale," she shrugs, "but that's just the way it goes. Harold built the company and he can do what he wants to with it. When they build something they can do what they please with it."

"I'm glad Harold chose to sell to Christian." I tell her watching the traffic.

"So is he. I'm glad Christian made the offer he did, because Harold really wanted to sell to him. He thinks Christian will take care of what he's built. So many of these companies now days just want to go in and strip it bare, keeping the meat and discarding the bones. Harold would die if he saw that happening to his baby."

"Christian doesn't believe in doing that. He always tries to save jobs and support the people who work for him. So far that philosophy has served him well."

"He's a good man, your husband." She smiles over at me.

"Yes. He's my good man."

After dropping Maggie back at the Four Seasons, I ask her to give my regards to her daughters-in-law and tell them I am looking forward to meeting them at dinner tomorrow evening. She thanks me for a lovely lunch and disappears back into the luxury hotel. Enjoying my drive back home I can't help but think about Tommy and wonder how he is and look forward to spending an evening with my own children.

"Mom!" I hear the delicate strains of Teddy's voice as they tear trough my aural canals and bounce off my ear drums. I meet him as he races across the foyer and hurls himself at me catching him and kneeling down to wrap him in my arms. I plant a kiss on his cheek so hard I believe he will carry the impression of my lips for a week.

"Mmmwa. How's my baby?"

"I'm not a baby."

"You're my baby. And no matter how big and hairy you get, you'll always be my baby." I nuzzle my face in his heck and snuggle him as he giggles.

"Where did you go this week?" he asks as I pull myself to my feet.

"Yes. I see you to, Jack." I pick up the fuzzy canine to keep him from bouncing his legs off. I do believe he is spring loaded. "I had to go to California."

"Why did you go to Calipornia?"

"I had some business to attend to. Where's Grace?" I ask as we walk to the family room.

He shrugs. "I dunno where she is. Probly Gail has her."

I walk to the sofa and plop down and kick off my shoes. "Oh, that feel so good." Teddy crawls in next to me and I pull him in my lap and cradle him. Stroking his hair, I look down and search his little face. "You are so handsome Master Grey."

He grins looking up at me. "I know. Dad told me it's just a face."

"What?" I give him a scowl.

"That's what dad said. He said that if someone is handsome that it's just a face and that you have to be handsome on the inside for it to count."

"Dad told you that?" I ask.

"Uh huh. He told me that when he was telling me about…" he points to his groin area.

"Oh. I see. What else did he tell you?" I ask.

"He said I'm not oppose to talk to girls about it. It's men stuff."

"Well, I'm not a girl. I'm your mother. You can always talk to me about things."

"Yeah, but you're still a girl. It's just stuff that guys need to know."

I pull him closer and wrap him in my arms. "Oh, Teddy. Please don't grow up so fast. Stay my little guy for a while longer."

He gives me a big wet kiss and a Teddy grin. "Okay Mom. I'll try, but like Dad said, things happen even of you don't want 'em to. Just part of life." He shrugs and smirks as he jumps up and runs off to play with Jack.

"Well, shit." Christian is taking over my baby and turning him into a man right before my eyes. I'll have to speak to Mr. Grey about that. Pushing up to stand on my feet I grab my shoes and drag myself to the staircase. Once I'm on the second floor and walking toward our bedroom, I hear Gail and Grace in her room so I stop in to see my daughter. "Hey baby. How's my sweet girl?" I pick her up and wrap her in my arms giving her a huge hug.

"I good mama. I misth you." I look at her just in time to see her pout.

"I missed you too. I'm so glad to be home. Were you a good girl for Gail and Daddy while I was gone?"

"Doddy woks too much. He not here when you gone." She is still pouting and playing with my pearls.

"I know sweetheart, but that's about over. Daddy had a big project at work, but it's just about over and he'll be home more now." I set her back down on her feet. "Mama's going to change her clothes and I'll play with you some before dinner, okay?"

As I turn to walk back to my bedroom, "Oh, Ana. That dress came from Neiman's. They delivered it right after you left. I hung it in your closet."

"Oh, thanks Gail." I give her a smile as I rub my neck and turn to leave."

When I manage to get myself to my bedroom I walk to the closet to look at the gray striped dress. _It really is pretty,_ I think to myself as I run my hands across the fabric. I pitch my shoes in the direction of my shoe wall like they will magically land in their spot on the shelf. They don't. Then shrug out of my sweater and untie my wrap dress, hanging them both up to air. I pull an old pair of jeans and a faded T-shirt from my dresser and don them both, then remove my strand of pearls. I look at them before putting them away. Rolling the cool strand of small orbs in my hands, they look so delicate and have the most beautiful pink undertone. Christian gave them to me the first year we were married. He does love pearls. He gave me a gift every month while I was pregnant with each of the kids. Each gift was so small and well thought out. Of course they each lead up to the granddaddy gift when I delivered. He can be so over the top at times. With Teddy it was a huge diamond bracelet. It's exquisite, but I believe I like these pearls so much more. I think they are one of the gifts I treasure most. Putting them away I try not to think about Sam. I can't bear to wear the pieces he gave me while I was carrying him, but then I can't get rid of them either.

Wiping my cheeks, I walk back out to the bedroom. "Oh my gosh!" I rush to the bed and there is a huge, white box gift wrapped with an overly large, fluffy, red bow. "What is this?" I say to myself.

"Open it and see." I hear from behind. Looking back I see my husband with a sweet smile walking toward me.

"Christian? Did you do this?" I ask as he reaches me and pulls me to him.

"Yes. I believe I did. Open it and see what I could have possibly gotten you." He teases.

The box is huge and I can hardly pick it up. I jump on the bed on my knees and rip open the paper after removing the red organza bow. Pulling the top off I see a note card on top of the tissue that protects the contents. I pull it out to read. "Whatever it costs, you're worth every fucking penny of it. I love you. Christian."

I walk over to him on my knees and put my arms around him as he sits on the edge of our bed, and give him a big kiss. "Thank you sweetheart." I whisper against his mouth. I can see his eyes darken as he searches my face and pulls me to him again. His tongue lightly glides across my bottom lip. As I capture it with my lips my mouth opens to him and he presses against me kissing me and pulling my shirt up to caress the small of my back. As I fall backwards I pull him with me and we recline on the bed. Soon he is on top of me with my jean legs wrapped around his thighs. His hands have found my breasts under my faded T and they are kneading and massaging them as my nipples strain against the pink lace cups. My breathing is becoming ragged as he glides his palms over my arms capturing my hands and pulling them up over my head.

A groan vibrates his chest as it escapes his lips and his hips begin to circle and thrust as they grind against my crotch. Leaving my mouth, his tongue glides down my throat and he stops to kiss the notch in my neck. "Oh, God," I whimper as he moves down to nuzzle between my breasts nipping them through my t-shirt.

"Fuck I'm gonna' come in my trousers if we don't stop," he groans.

"We can have them cleaned." I gasp as he continues to grind his manhood against my girlhood.

"We haven't dry humped in ages," he snarls into my neck.

"I know. Just don't stop." I beg. "No time to undress." I can feel that pulling that tells me I'm about to reach the brink.

"I feel like a fucking teenager," he growls down at me.

"Then let's pretend we're teenagers. Don't stop." I grab his head and pull his mouth to mine gasping into it. "Oh, fuck. Christian," I cry as I glare up into his eyes and my body quivers and trembles beneath him. As the last spasm plays out, he buries his head in my neck.

"God damn, Ana. Shit." I can feel him jerk against my crotch as he quakes over me and rides out his release. As he relaxes and falls on me he tries to catch his breath. "Fuck. What a mess." He grumbles with disgust.

He rolls off and lies beside me as we gasp for air. "That was interesting." I smile over at him.

"That was juvenile." He pulls at the front of his trousers adjusting himself. He looks down at himself. "Look at me. I've come all over myself."

I roll on my side and give him a kiss, "Well I thought it was sort of sweet. I like that you want me so much you can't even wait to take your pants off."

"You haven't even looked in the box yet," he chuckles.

"That's right." I jump up and crawl over him to get to the treasure. Stopping briefly I grin down at him, "If I really like it, I'll letcha' fuck me with my pants off."

"You got a deal." He says dryly, rubbing his hands over his face still staring at the ceiling.

Pulling the tissue away, I gasp as I pull the black Lanvin dress from the box. "Oh, Christian. I don't understand. I cancelled this dress. How did you know?"

He rolls on his side propping on his elbow to look at me, "I had a feeling you were going to start having guilt pangs and cancel the dress, so I just called Neiman's and told them whatever you had bought, if you cancelled it to send it over anyway. I stopped by Wednesday and gave them the enclosure card to put in it."

"You did this for me with all the Vanderberg stuff going on?" I ask as I clutch the designer goods to me. "Look at it Christian." I hold it out." Isn't it just beautiful? Oh thank you, Sweetheart." I bend down and kiss him, then sit up to admire the dress.

"I wanted you to have it. You never ask for much, so when there is something you really like, I want you to have it."

I drop the dress and let it fall back on the clouds of white tissue as I straddle Christian and lay on top of his chest. "I love you."

"I love you too, Baby." He grins and looks down at me and wraps his arms around me. "Now get them britches off."


	53. Chapter 53

_**Fifty Shades…Full Circle**_

_**Chapter 53**_

After I have properly thanked my husband for his generous gift, this time sans jeans, I am lying in his arms tracing the sinew in his chiseled forearm. "We need to get up and spend some time with our children. I've been gone and you've been working long hours. I think they miss us."

"I know. I miss them too." Christian rubs his eyes with his fingers and sighs, "It was so much easier building the company before I had children. It's hard to devote enough time to each one of them."

"I think the kids have priority." I smile up at him and softly press my lips to his ribs. "What did you tell Teddy about his face?"

"What?" he looks down at me, clueless about what I just asked him. "What about his face?"

"I told him he was handsome and he said, 'It's just a face', just like you do. He said that's what you told him."

"Oh, that. We were having _the 'pendis' talk,_ about growing up and somehow we got off on girls and how they would start liking him and he would like them back. I told him that he would probably have girls like him because he would be handsome and that taking advantage of that was not nice. I told him that being handsome meant being a good person on the inside not just handsome on the outside. I don't want him to grow up and take advantage of every piece that throws herself at him because he is good looking and has a lot of money. Believe me it will happen."

He smiles down at me and kisses my head, "I want him to find the right girl and that girl will not be one of those that drops her drawers for him before she even knows him."

"Did he understand?" I ask tentatively wondering if he actually went into that much detail with a seven year old.

"Well, I didn't go into all that much detail right now." _Thank God_. " I just explained the handsome part. I sort of paved the way for a later talk. It's for his protection as well. I don't want him knocking some little tart up and having to deal with that mess. I mean I want him to have a good time, but be careful and respectful of the girls he gets involved with."

"Gosh. I'm not ready for all of that." I shake my head. "Teddy is a sensitive little boy. I can't see him taking advantage of girls."

"Ever heard the saying, A stiff dick has no conscious?"

"Yes, I believe I have heard something about that somewhere." I give him a soft jab in his ribs with my fist.

" Ow." He feigns pain with a wince. "Well, it's pretty fucking true."

Looking up into his gray eyes I remind him, "Your stiff dick has a conscious."

"My stiff dick has an outlet. And a beautiful one that I love very much." He traces his finger down my cheek. "Teddy will have more hormones than you can imagine and they'll drive him crazy. I just want him to be prepared and understand how to handle them. I wasn't and I went off the tracks."

"But not yet."

"No he's a way off from that. I just don't want it to come as a surprise to him."

"Okay. Time to go shower a little love on our children." I pry myself away from him and we get up walking to the bathroom to clean up. "Do you want to shower?" I ask as I turn on the water and it falls from the rain head.

"If we do that, we'll never make it downstairs." He soaks a washcloth and tries to wash up as I stand under the warm water falling on me in the shower. "Fuck. I'm just a mess. This ain't gonna' cut it." He walks over and gets under the water with me. "Move over. And don't start anything," he warns me.

"No sir. I won't." I tell him as he watches me lave the soapy bath sponge over myself. The lather slides off of my breasts and down my abdomen catching in the brown curls between my thighs.

"Fuck." I hear Christian mutter. I turn to see him leaning toward the wall and pressing his palms against the ceramic tiles of the shower, his head hanging down.

"What is it sweet heart?" I ask as I rinse the foam from my skin.

"Just finish and go dry off," he grumbles at me.

"Christian? What's the matter?" I press the issue.

"Nothing, just hurry up and finish," he growls back at me over his shoulder.

Not being able to leave it alone, I pull at his shoulder forcing him to turn around. As he does I can see his problem. It is at full length and girth and calling my name. "Sweetheart, I'm sorry. Can I help?" I try not to smile.

"NO. Just get finished and get out. I just need a minute to get things under control."

I reach up to put my arms around him. "Stop…. that." He tries to suppress a grin as he pretends to fight me off. " Please. Just give me a minute."

"Okay. I'll meet you downstairs." I give him a quick kiss on his cheek and the exit the shower wrapping myself in a fluffy white terry robe to dry off.

After sliding into a fresh pair of old jeans and a clean, faded T-shirt, I hurry down stairs to see my kids who are playing tug of war with Jack. I think the kids are losing. "Hey, what are you guys up to?" I ask as I walk over to the trio.

"We payin' wif Jack. He twyin' to take a toy." Grace tries to get out as she giggles and tugs at the limp dish towel that Gail has tied a knot in to make a toy. A few moments later Christian hits the family room and falls on the sofa next to me. He's all clean in his worn jeans and a polo shirt with his hair still a bit damp from his shower and he smells incredible. I put my hand on his thigh. "All better?" I ask.

"I believe so, for now anyway." He nods.

Leaning over I rub my nose against his neck and inhale deeply,"Mmmmm. You smell good."

"Don't get started with that." Christian is leans against my lap and props on his elbow as we watch the fray taking place on the floor. "I'm starving. How long before dinner?"

"Gail said about fifteen minutes." I can't help but play with his hair. It's always so curly when it's damp.

"What are we having?"

"I have no idea, but something smells wonderful. It's making my stomach growl."

"Grace, Teddy. Take it easy." Christian grumbles over at the kids. Grace is giggling so hard she pays no attention. They continue pulling and tugging at the limp rag that is secured on the other end by Jack's mouth. Jack shows no sign of relinquishing his claim on the fabric; quite the contrary, he is growling and tugging trying to steal it away from Grace's hold. The harder Jack pulls, the louder Grace squeals and giggles. "NO, Jack. My wag. Gib it to me."

"Jack. No growling." Christian warns the canine. Jack stops to look up at Christian, and he immediately releases his grip on the toy as he bounds over to greet Christian. Before we can move Grace reels backward and falls on the floor banging her head. There is that brief moment of silence before her face wrinkles and the tears begin to flood. Her cry pierces the air and Christian is to her and scoops her in his arms before she can take a breath. "Come here sweetheart. Did you bump your noggin? Let Daddy look at it." Christian has her pressed to his chest and is rubbing her head as he sits on the sofa and cradles her. He spreads kisses on her face and wipes her tears with his thumb. "It's okay baby girl. Don't cry. Daddy's here."

"Here let me see." I sit up and glide my fingers through her hair, feeling her scalp for any lumps or bumps. "I don't feel anything. I think it just knocked the wind out of her." Bending over I press my lips to her and kiss her curls.

"Shh. Shh. Baby." Christian tries to soothe her. It doesn't take long for her to stop the water works and begin to sniffle. Christian sits her up on his lap. "There. Daddy tried to get you not to play so rough." Grace wipes her eyes and pouts; her lower lip almost to the bottom of her chin. Christian tugs at it trying to grab it between his fingers as Grace tries her best not to smile.

"That's my girl. All better?" he kisses her head. She nods but curls back up in his lap refusing to leave. Christian folds her in his arms and she snuggles into him as we watch Teddy and Jack continue the game minus Grace.

"Have you heard anything from the girl?" He quietly asks me softly pursing his lips to his daughter's head.

"No. I hired a couple of nursing students to sit with Tommy so he won't be alone and so that Lorna can't try to take him. The Child Services worker said unless she cooperates and agrees to go to rehab with us taking responsibility, they'll take Tommy into state custody."

"We have to take responsibility?" he looks over and asks.

"Yes. We have to make sure she doesn't run off with him and that she goes to the rehab facility." I try to explain. "Once she is here, Washington will be her state of residence and they will transfer his records to Child Welfare Department here to follow."

Christian nods his agreement without saying anything. "How is your arm? I forgot to ask." He softly strokes my pale shriveled wrist where the cast formerly resided.

"It's fine. I'm just glad to get that thing off. I was supposed to go Wednesday but I was still in California, so they worked me in quickly this morning before I picked up Maggie. I'm just trying to be careful with it. The doctor gave me a brace to wear if I need it."

He picks up my wrist and pulls my fingers to his lips and kisses them then presses his lips to the now healed fracture. "I'm sorry," he softly whispers as though he were saying it to himself.

"It's all better. At least now I can say I've had a broken bone. Just add it to the list of firsts with you, Mr. Grey." I smile over at him.

"I'd rather that one not be on the list, if it's all the same to you."

"Christian, I'm just glad things weren't worse. It could have turned out to be a disaster, but it wasn't. I'm fine and I'm just glad you're okay." I stroke his hair, letting my hand come to rest on his shoulder. "Thank God for Teddy."

* * *

"Christian, what time do you want me at the office tomorrow?" I ask as I slip a nightgown over my head. The fabric hits all my curves as it skims down my naked body and the straps come to rest on my shoulders. Christian has on his boxers and a white undershirt and has already positioned himself on his side, propped on his elbow on our bed watching me and waiting for me to join him.

"I thought you might go in with me. I'm expecting everyone around eleven to sign all the contracts."

Walking over to the bed, I'm still dragging a brush through my hair. As I sit down on the bed I look down at him, "Who all will be there tomorrow?" I ask.

Christian reaches up and tweaks one of my nipples with his thumb and forefinger. "Aaoooww." I smack his butt. "What was that for?"

He gets a wide grin, "It was just there staring me in the face. I couldn't resist."

"So you thought you'd just pinch it?" I glare down at him. "Yeah." He nods nonchalantly.

I reach over and tweak his. "How do you like that?"

"Ouch. That hurts." He grimaces.

"See. Isn't so funny is it? These are not here purely for your entertainment." I gesture to my breasts.

"Sure they are. What else are you gonna' do with 'em?" he asks trying to suppress his grin.

"Same thing you're gonna' do with _that." _I reach down and barely tweak the end of his resting member through his boxers.

"_Shit." _He cowers and uses his forearm to protect himself. "Get your hands off of that. Don't abuse the '_pendis'_."

"Well, don't abuse the breasts, mister." I tell him with a big smirk on my face.

In one swift move his hand finds its way under the silk of my gown and he gently tugs on the patch of dark curls nestled between my thighs. "How about if I abuse this for a while?" He murmurs with his lips pressed against my neck. "Mmmm. I see you were expecting me," he growls as his fingers sink into my waiting flesh.

Inhaling deeply, "I'm trying to talk to you," I gasp.

"I'm listening," he breathes into my ear. I don't know which is more intoxicating, his mouth against my skin or his fingers gliding back and forth against me, but my head is swimming and I'm finding it difficult to put words together.

"I…uh…I... was just….." as my hairbrush falls to the floor, I turn and snake my arms around his neck and brush my lips against his. They are soft and warm and full. As my tongue gently skims across his lower lip, his mouth opens to me drawing my tongue in to dance with his.

His fingers never leave me; they only increase their intensity gliding back and forth over me causing me to wimper against his mouth. Christian pulls me to him tighter as he pushes me down following me back on our bed. My thighs grant him easy access and his mouth never leaves me as his lips softly glide across mine; flesh against flesh, wetness against wetness, desire matching desire.

As he pulls his mouth from mine, he lifts his head to look down and search my face. My hands move down to his upper arms and my fingers press into his flesh. "God you are so beautiful," he whispers. My breathing is so ragged that I can't even answer him as he is bringing me to a fever pitch. "I…I…" I moan as my eyes meet his.

"Shhh. Just relax and enjoy, baby." He softly bends and kisses my forehead as I continue to writhe below him. Lifting his head he stares down into my eyes that plead with him not to stop. "I'm going to make you come. I want to watch you," he whispers.

"Uh huh.." is all I can manage as I nod my head. I am on the brink and he is pushing me; driving me toward the release he wants me to have. His tongue slides over my chest tasting the salty perspiration between my breasts and he follows it with a soft kiss, then moves his head to take a breast into his mouth, nipping and tugging through the soft white silk. Digging my fingers into his upper arms, my back arches as he sends me over the edge. My eyes open as he lifts his head and our eyes meet just as I am consumed.

"Christian," escapes my lips and he searches my face as he looks down watching me give myself to him. He buries his face in my neck, "You are so fucking beautiful. So fucking sexy. And you are mine." His lips press against my skin as a flush warms my cheeks and spreads across my chest. My climax waning, I relax against him and his hand leaves my thighs and moves to cup my head. Once again his lips meet mine and he gently moves his soft mouth over me. His fingers twist in my hair and I reach up to slide my hands through his hair capturing his curls with my fingers and pulling him closer against me. His other hand floats down my shoulder, caressing my ribs and then my hip. It comes to rest cupping my thigh then pulling my knee up to his waist.

Releasing his hair, my palm moves down over his firm chest and circles under his arm feeling his chiseled back. I'm still consumed in his kiss; still relishing his mouth against mine and his tongue teasing me. My hand drops to cup his exquisite butt and I squeeze as I pull his pelvis firmly against mine. Moving down it finds its way under the cotton boxers; tracing his muscles with my fingers, it moves to his abdomen stroking between the 'V'. He inhales suddenly as my fingers find him and I take him in my hand, squeezing and pulling.

"Oh, fuck," he gasps and his eyes roll back as his lids close. My hand softly moves up and down against him as I feel him twitch in my palm. "Oh God, baby," softly escapes his lips as I push him back and move to lie with my chest pressed against his.

Once again I push my lips against his and draw a breath from him, still pulling and stroking as I feel the first bit of moisture escape him giving my hand ease to continue my caresses. "I love you, Christian," is whispered against his neck as my nose glides up his throat coming to rest just below his ear.

Christian fists his hand in my hair as his other hand cups my breast, massaging and kneading the soft mound. "Oh, God Ana," he murmurs as I increase my pace. I can feel his breathing begin to become ragged as his fist tightens its hold on my hair pulling at the strands. "Oh fuck, oh fuck, oh fuck…" he gasps as I feel him catch his breath and tense. The veins in his chest and neck dilate as he unravels, trembling next to me; spilling out his release. His face and chest begin to flush just before he finds his breath again. "Oh, God I love you," escapes him as he relaxes against me and turns to wrap me in his arms. His head buries itself between my breasts as he softly laves my chest in kisses and I wrap his head with my arms and kiss his hair.

After a few minutes, Christian pulls his boxers off and uses them to clean himself tossing them to the floor and then pulls the cover up over us. I lay my head on his chest as his arms circle my waist pulling me to him.

As I snuggle in against him, "Now again. Who will be there tomorrow?" I ask.

"It will be Harold and Maggie, Bruce and his brother Harold, Jr. Maybe their wives. Our attorneys and their attorneys. Ros. You and me. That's about it," he grumbles back exhausted.

"Goodness. That's enough. Why are Maggie and Harold's boys going to be there since they don't really want to sell anyway?"

"Because they each own part of the company and they will have to sign the contracts to sell."

"What if they don't?"

"Don't what?"

"Don't sign the contracts? What if they refuse to cooperate?"

"They won't."

"What makes you so sure?"

He presses his lips to my forehead to kiss me, "Because I'm going to make them very, (kiss) very ( kiss) rich tomorrow. Besides, Maggie will put them in time out if they don't," he grins.

"I like Maggie. You know she wanted to go to lunch without the daughters- in-law today. I did invite them, but she said she preferred just the two of us."

"I think she probably just wanted to get to know you without all the drama from those two."

"I almost envy her and Harold. Did you know they are selling so they can spend more time with each other?"

"Yes, I knew that." Christian answers. "I think Harold is a very smart man who adores his wife. He made a very good decision."

"Maybe we can do that someday. Just the two of us." I snuggle in next to him and he wraps his arms around me tighter. " We can eat and sleep late and talk and travel…."

"And fuck our brains out."

"…and make love. That is if you're still able at your advanced age."

"Don't worry yourself about that. But I won't be selling anything. Teddy and Grace will have to look after things." He gives me a kiss on my head.

"What if they don't want to?"

"What? Not want to run the company? That'll never happen."

"What makes you so sure?"

"I have very strong entrepreneurial genes, that will dominate your I wanna' read a book genes." He smiles down at me.

"Oh yea?" I return the smile.

"Ooohhh, yes." He closes his eyes and sighs.

"Come here, Mr. Entrepreneur," I move my leg between his as they entwine. It only takes a few moments for me to fall asleep in his arms.


	54. Chapter 54

_**Fifty Shades…Full Circle**_

_**Chapter 54**_

"You look nice." Christian smiles over at me as I emerge from my dressing room in a sleeveless yellow linen dress with a wide black paten belt and matching white cotton cardigan. My hair is in a ponytail and I have on my pearl strand and pearl studs. "I like those colors on you. They're all soft and summery."

"Thanks. You look rather spiffy yourself." I give him a peck on his lips as he adjusts his cuffs and fastens his watch on his wrist. He looks good enough eat in a black Armani suit with a white shirt and black tie. The cut of the trousers, emphasizes the fact that he works out…religiously. I slide my feet into my black paten pumps. "Christian do you think I need to look more business like? I can change into a suit."

"Naw. You look beautiful." He walks over and presses his lips to my forehead. "I like you to look all soft and sweet. I look ballbusters in suits all day long. It's nice to see my wife looking like a girl."

"Well, since being a girl is my only option, I'm glad you approve." I notice Christian watching me in the mirror as I poof on some blush and slide on a pale coral lipstick. "What?" I look at him and our eyes meet in the mirror.

"He shakes his head, "Nothing. Just watching you decorate that smart mouth of yours. It's very sexy to watch."

I give him a wink and a smile and finish decorating my face then grab a yellow and black leather bag and load my necessities into it. Walking over to Christian, I put my arms around his waist and smile up at him. "Are you happy today, Mr. Grey?"

"Yes, Mrs. Grey. Actually I am. I've looked forward to this day for quite a while." He gives a playful tug on my ponytail and then takes my arm. "Ready?" he asks.

"If you are." Christian and I walk arm in arm down the stairs before the kids are even up. As Taylor drives us to Grey House in Christian's black Audi SUV, Christian takes care of emails on his phone and I am looking out my window watching the world pass by us at warp speed.

"Christian?"

"Yeah?" he looks up at me from his phone. "What Babe?"

"What do you use for money when you buy something like this?"

"I use money for money." He looks at me a bit confused.

"I mean where do you get the money to buy a big company like Vanderberg Industries?"

"I have the money…er.. _we_ have the money."

"So if we buy this and spend all our money, what do we use for money?"

He looks at me and shakes his head like he doesn't really understand what I'm asking. "I use a considerable portion of our money, but I don't want to deplete our resources, so I borrow the rest. And before you ask, I borrow it from a bank." This is obviously an excerpt from, Acquisitions for _Dummies_.

"I know where you borrow money from. So how do we get the money back?" I ask.

Christian smiles and reaches over kissing my forehead. "Don't worry about money. Leave that up to me."

"I'm not worried about it; I just wondered how these things work."

He stops and looks back over at me putting his phone away." The companies that we buy either make money or at least have the potential to make money or I wouldn't buy them. So once we own them then we get the profit they produce, plus our present holdings continue to turn a profit and I use that to repay the loans and rebuild our reserves."

"Oh. I guess that makes sense. I'm sorry. I guess I should have known that."

He pulls me over closer to him on the seat and puts his arm around my shoulders. "I'll be glad to explain anything you don't understand."

"I guess that's pretty much it. It just ran across my mind and I wondered how you could buy a company that's almost the size of Grey Enterprise without spending everything we have."

"Well, that's why I put you to work. I needed the extra cash flow so I could make this purchase." He smiles at me.

"Right. What I make wouldn't pay your salary, much less be a drop in the bucket toward buying a company." I look out the window as we speed down the road toward Grey House.

"Don't denigrate what you contribute to our finances." He lifts my chin with his hand forcing me to look at him. "I'm very proud of you Mrs. Grey."

"Why? I thought I just wanted to read books." I ask him with the beginnings of a smirk on my lips.

"You are the other half that makes us a whole. You have what I don't. You are, what I'm not. I couldn't edit a book if I had to."

"And you can do what I can't. I couldn't balance a checkbook if I had to." I give him a half smile.

"That's why we need each other. That's why we are so good together. That's why I can't live without you."

"Because I can't balance a checkbook?"

He leans over to whisper in my ear, "No, because you're sexy as fuck and I can't do without you." He presses his lips to my neck just below my ear.

I have to giggle and I swat him away. "Buying companies makes you horny."

"Yes, Sweetheart. I'm afraid it does," he confesses.

After we get to Grey House and arrive on the twentieth floor, Christian's floor, he nods toward the private executive dining room. "Go on down to the dining room. I had some breakfast ordered up for us. Go ahead and start and I'll be in, in a minute."

Walking in the room I see the covered chafing dish and peer into it. It has a breakfast potato casserole in it and then I remove the cloches covering the two plates positioned between the place settings on the table. Both contain Eggs Benedict smothered in Hollandaise with a side of steamed asparagus. "Mmmm. My favorite. My husband thinks of everything." I serve up some casserole on each plate and find fresh croissants in a warmer. After filling a cup with hot water for my tea I pour Christian a cup of steaming coffee with a splash of cream. Just as I finish. Christian walks through the door.

"Is Eggs Benedict okay?" he asks as he sits down and puts his napkin in his lap.

"Perfect. You think of everything."

"I knew we needed to be here early and I didn't want you to miss breakfast." He grins over as he butters his croissant and sips on his coffee.

"Christian? Will I need to sign anything today?"

He shakes his head, "No why?"

"I just wondered. You said Maggie and the sons would need to sign the contracts since they owned a share in Vanderberg Industries. You're always telling me that I own half of GEH, so I wondered if I needed to sign anything."

Christian blots the napkin to his mouth and takes a sip of coffee before he releases big sigh. "Well, that situation is different. Maggie and the boys own a legal share of that company. The shares have been legally signed over to them. In our case, all shares of GEH remain in my name, except for the 2.5 percent that I gave to Ros. So technically Ros and I are the only ones whose signature is required on a sale or purchase."

"So, I don't really own half of GEH then. Not legally?" I ask.

"Technically you don't, but since we have no prenup, half of everything belongs to you," he explains.

"But it only would belong to me if we divorce. Right?"

He slowly nods his head. "Technically yes. At this point your name is not on ownership of GEH. Not technically."

"So I own half of the company in spirit, not in actuality."

He nods his head, "That's right. But that means you aren't liable for its failings either."

"I just wondered." I take another bite of my breakfast. "So if we were to divorce, I would have to go to court to obtain my half of GEH."

"Yes. That's right," he answers cautiously. I can feel him studying me.

"What if you die? What happens then?" I ask.

"In my will you inherit one hundred percent of my shares of the company. I have trusts set up for the children as well as for members of my family. I've made sure everyone will be taken care of." He glances sideways at me. "Ana? Is there something you want to talk about? Something you aren't telling me?"

"Huh? Um. No. Why?"

"All this talk of divorce or how my will is set up?"

"Oh. Sweetheart. You know better than that. I was just interested. I have no idea how things are structured. I didn't understand the difference in our situation and Maggie and Harold's."

Christian reaches over and takes my hand in his. "Ana? Would you feel better if I put half of everything in your name? Make you owner outright?"

"Oh." I shake my head." No. No Sweetheart. I have no idea how any of this works. I really was just asking because I had never really thought about it before."

"I'll do it." I detect a slight flinch and his eyes almost reflect fear as he searches mine and he clings tighter to my hand. "I'll have the papers drawn up this week. I have no qualms what so ever, signing half of what I own over to you."

"Oh, Christian. No. Don't give it another thought. It really was a stupid question. I just didn't realize. I wouldn't have a clue what to do with half a corporation." I try to chuckle and give him a smile.

"You know just because your name isn't on the paperwork, doesn't mean I don't consider you half owner. Right?" he asks me.

"I know." I peer at him over the rim of my cup as I sip my tea.

"This way it just saves you from having to be involved in the day to day crap that I have to deal with. But it doesn't mean we are any less partners in this."

"Christian. It's okay."

He tugs on my hand pulling me to my feet and then drawing me down in his lap. Wrapping me in his arms he gives me a squeeze. " Ana. Just tell me what you want. Anything. Anything at all and if it's in my power, it's yours."

I trace the line of his jaw. "I know. I don't need or want anything. I have everything I need right here." I cup his face in my hands, then lean in and meet his lips with mine softly moving them against his. I snake my arms around him and pull him close resting my chin on his shoulder. "Oh, Christian. You are all I ever wanted. You make me happy. You make me feel safe. You make me feel beautiful and most of all you make me feel loved."

"That's because you _are_ beautiful and you are most definitely loved." He brushes aside several hair strands that have fallen around my neck and softy presses his lips to the flesh just below my ear.

"Mmmm. I like that." I whisper to him.

"I know." I can feel him smile against my skin. "I know your body, Ana."

"How do you know my body?"

"When I kiss you here," he softly kisses below my ear again, "your body goes limp and you melt into me. Another kiss," he repeats his kiss on my neck, " and I can do anything I want. You're mine."

"You're right." I sigh as I force myself away from him. "Too bad we're in an executive dining room or I'd let ya'."

He raises his eyebrows, "It's _my _ executive dining room. I can do what I want in it."

"It's _our_ executive dining room and I'll give you a rain check for this evening." I smile down at him as I try to stand up. "Now eat your breakfast."

He pulls me tight and kisses my throat, "You know what I'd rather eat, and it has nothing to do with breakfast."

"Mmmm. That really does feel good. But you have contracts to sign, Mr. Grey." I bend my head around to rest in the crook of his neck and wrap my arms around his shoulders.

"Not for a couple of hours."

"You are beside yourself today, mister." I quickly plant a kiss on his neck just above his stiff white collar.

"Mr. Gr…..Oh. I'm sorry. Excuse me." Andrea walks through the door and tries to avert her eyes.

"That's okay, Andrea. Mr. Grey and I were just discussing mergers." I give him a wicked smile and a wink as I try to extricate myself from his lap, but he holds me tight preventing my escape.

"What is it Andrea?" he looks up at her. I try again to get up, but can tell he isn't going to release me.

"Um. Uh. Ros was looking for you. She has a few things she wants to go over with you."

"Okay. Where is she?" he asks.

"In her office, sir." Andrea is still trying to avert her eyes away from us.

"Okay. Tell her to meet me in my office in ten," Christian advises her finding his CEO voice.

"Yes, Mr. Grey." She turns a quickly exits to deliver Christian's request to his partner.

"Christian. Let me up." I demand as I pull up and out of his lap. "Why wouldn't you let me up when Andrea walked in? That was a little embarrassing."

"Not as embarrassing as this." He looks down to his lap and winces as he adjusts the more than obvious strain against the front of his black trousers.

I can't help but suppress a giggle, "Yes. I can see that would have been a problem."

I sit back down and take a sip of my now tepid tea, "Yuck. Cold." I smile at him as I take a bite of my croissant, "Get yourself under control Mr. Grey. You have business to conduct in a few minutes."

"Yes. Quite." He wipes his mouth and tosses the linen napkin on the table as he stands. "Finish your breakfast. I'm going to see what Ros wants. I'll be in my office when you get through." He turns and exits the room leaving me to my tepid tea and cold croissant_._

I have to sigh._ Sex on legs one moment and CEO an instant later. My God how did I ever find him? I just thank the good lord every day that I did._

In a few hours, we find ourselves in the large conference room. All of the Vanderbergs are seated on one side of the table with their advisors and we are on ours. Andrea is seated taking notes and Ros is grinning like the Cheshire Cat. Christian stands and welcomes everyone with a special notice paid to Harold and Maggie. He thanks everyone for all their hard work and diligence over the years and their willingness to compromise and work together for the good of everyone. He gives special thanks to Harold and Maggie for their willingness to do what is best for their company and assures them that he will be a good shepherd to what they are entrusting to him. With that he asks if there are any reservations and if everyone is satisfied with the contracts.

"I think we are ready, Christian." Harold nods to Christian and smiles.

"Well, then if everyone will sign in their designated place , there are markers by the appropriate place for your signature." Christian advises and Harold opens to the place for his signature. He gives Maggie a smile and she returns it ten-fold as she squeezes his arm, before he places his mark on the paper. He passes the contract to Maggie and she takes his pen and signs underneath him. The contract is then passed to Harold Jr. and he begrudgingly signs as he wife looks on with a scowl on her face. Finally Bruce receives the contract and hesitates. Maggie gives him the same look I give Teddy when he is misbehaving , must be universal, and he huffs as he signs in the appropriate place. Then Ros signs and finally Christian takes his Mont Blanc and finalizes the contract. Before the pen can hit the table, he is on his feet and pumping Harold's hand. The men put a palm on each other's shoulder and embrace as they whisper something to each other and smile and nod.

I walk around to Maggie and give her a hug. "Are you sure you're okay with this?" I ask.

"Oh, absolutely. It'll be nice to finally have my husband back. I can't wait," she gushes.

I then approach the Vanderberg offspring and shake their hands and offer conciliatory remarks to try to assuage their disdain for the situation. They are polite and smile, but I can feel the tension.

After additional contracts are signed and everyone is satisfied, the attorneys shake hands and pack their briefcases with all the documents. Christian reminds all of the Vanderbergs of our dinner plans this evening to celebrate the transaction. We agree to pick them up at their hotel at eight as we walk them to the elevator.

As the door closes on the Vanderbergs, we hear Ros calling for Christian. She is in his office and peering around his open door. "Christian, my I see you in your office for a moment?"

"Sure. On my way," he affirms.

He puts his arm around my waist and kisses my forehead and pulls me to walk back to his office with him. As we enter Ros, Andrea and several high executives in legal, finance, operations, PR, etc. all give out a collective, "Wa hooo!" and break out in applause. Ros quickly hands Christian and me a glass of Bollinger and everyone raises their glasses.

"Christian, I never thought we'd see this day," Ros beams over at him.

"You mean you doubted me, Ros?" Christian asks as he cocks his head and sips his champagne.

She shakes her head, "No. No I never doubt you, Christian. It was just so long in getting here."

"Well, I wanted it done right. This was not a process to be rushed. But it's a done deal, by God." He gives her a grin and clinks her glass.

"Everyone! Everyone, I'd like to say something." Christian tries to get everyone's attention. " I just want to thank everyone for their continued perseverance and hard work on this project. Your diligence is much appreciated," then remembering himself," even though it goes without saying, it is expected."

I smile up at him and give him a jab in the ribs after his last remark. I am rewarded with a quick kiss and a smile. After the celebration subsides, Christian reminds everyone that they still have a company to run and shoos everyone from his office. He falls into his leather chair behind his desk and leans back rubbing his hands over his face. "Oh, God, I'm glad that's over with."

"I guess I'd better get back home." I tell him.

He holds out his arm and wiggles his fingers to motion me to come. "Come here."

As I approach him, he reaches for my hand and pulls me in his lap. His hand softly glides up my leg as I rest my head on his chest momentarily. "Now where we?" he asks beginning to kiss my neck again.

"I was about to leave." I remind him.

"No. I want you to stay," he whispers as he finds my neck with his mouth.

"Christian. This isn't the place." I try to remind him.

"Why? We've fucked in my office before," he murmurs.

"I know, baby. But everyone is so excited and the place is buzzing," I explain. "Just come home tonight and we can celebrate. "I'll chill a bottle of champagne and have Gail make us something special to nibble on and we can celebrate all night long."

"All I want to nibble on is you," he grumbles. "But if you insist. I will take a rain check for tonight. By the way, when did you start saying 'no' to me?"

"Christian, I said later, not 'no'. I would never say no to you. If I did, I'd be depriving myself of you. I'll never do that."

"Okay." He pouts.

"That's my good boy." I give him a kiss on his nose. "What time will you be home?"

"I won't be late. Will you lay out a dinner suit for me?"

"Sure. Any preference?" I ask.

"Nope. Just pick something that makes me look good."

"Christian? Really?" I back up and glare at him.

"What?"

"There isn't anything you don't look good in and you know it." I give him a good roll of the eyes.

"Careful with the eyes, Mrs. Grey," he warns. "I may have to bring you back into line."

"We'll discuss later." I get out of his lap and grab my purse. "I'll see you at home." I grab the door handle to leave. "Christian?"

"Yeah, babe?"

"Congratulations. I really am happy for you." I give him a big smile.

"Thanks. I'll have Andrea call for the car to take you home."

I give him a wink, "I love you."

"Back at you. Be careful."

* * *

Getting back to the house, I kiss my kids and change into something comfortable. As I hit the bottom of the staircase on my way to my office, I hear Grace shriek.

_Good God in heaven. What's wrong_? I think to myself as I rush to the family room_. _As I arrive I see Grace bobbing up and down to the music on the television. "Baby I wuv yooooou. Yesth, baby I wuv yoooou….." she is singing along with the television; well trying to sing. "Grace?"

"Mama. Wook! Isth him." She points to the TV and continues to gyrate and sing.

I gape at the TV and see some young boy singing and dancing and Grace is right in there with him. "It's who baby?" I ask.

"Isth Emmy, Mama. Itsth Emmy." She squeals again.

About that time Gail comes in to see what the problem is. "Oh. It's him again." She shakes her head.

"Who? What's going on?" I ask.

Gail smiles, "Seems Grace has her first crush. It's some boy named Émile."

"Émile who?" I ask.

"I have no idea. Just Émile." She shrugs. "She goes crazy every time he's on TV or she hears that song on the radio."

"But he's a baby." I sound incredulous as I glare at the child on the TV screen.

"Yes. It would seem. But evidently he's a very popular baby with a hit song." Gail smiles as we both watch Grace sing and dance in her own little world.

I have to smile, "It's sort of cute isn't it?" Gail and I both have to giggle as we watch her curls bounce and she tries to dance.

Teddy walks in followed closely by Jack, and wraps his arms around my waist and leans into me. I run my hands over his shoulders and down his back. "Hey, Tedster. What's up?"

"Nuthin'," he grumbles.

"Doesn't sound like nuthin'," I mimic him.

"When's the pool gonna' be done?" he asks.

"Oh. Hopefully soon. Maybe the end of next week. Why?"

"I wanna' swim. I'm ready for it to be finished."

"I know. It won't be too much longer, though."

"Do you have to work today?" he asks looking up at me.

"Well, I should. Do you need me?" I ask as I rub his head.

He nods against me. "Uh huh."

"Okay. Let's go sit on the sofa." I put my arm around him and we walk over to sit down. As we do he crawls up in my lap and snuggles against me. "Wanna' tell me what's wrong?" I ask him.

"Nuffin'. I just miss you sometimes." He mumbles and plays with his fingers.

"Oh. I'm sorry. Have I been gone a lot?"

"Uh huh. " he nods.

"I'm sorry. When that happens, just tell me." I rock him and play with his hair.

"Dad works all the time and now you work too. I want you to stay home." He is really pouting now.

"Well, baby I work from home. You can always come in and see me."

"But you went away last week to Calipornia."

"That won't happen all the time. Come here." I pull him up closer into my lap and give him a squeeze and kiss his head. "Soon, you'll be getting big and you won't want to sit in my lap anymore."

"Why?" he looks up and asks.

"You'll just get to be a big boy, as big as Daddy and you'll be too big to fit in my lap anymore. Besides you'll have things you'd rather do than sit in my lap."

"No I won't. And if I get too big, you can sit in my lap," he offers.

"Okay. Baby, that's a deal." I have to smile as we watch Grace wind down after Émile leaves the screen.

Christian will be so pleased to find out grace has another man in her life.


	55. Chapter 55

_**Fifty Shades…Full Circle**_

_**Chapter 55**_

After exiting the shower, I shroud myself in my fluffy white terry robe to dry off. Gosh I could take a nap, but I know my husband will be home shortly. Entering his closet I look over the rows of suits and shirts hung with precision as if cataloged. Each appears to be a clone of the other differing only in color. His sweaters, folded to identical size and stacked on the wooden shelves lie closeted behind doors to prevent dust from collecting on them. His closet has his scent and it begs me to linger, but I need to lay out his clothes for the evening. In doing so, I pull out a navy Brioni suit, hanging it out for him along with a freshly cleaned white dress shirt. I choose a silk, pale gray, patterned tie to go with it and lay it on his dresser along with his GEH monogramed cuff links and a handkerchief. Looking over his shoe closet I pick a pair of black Oxford Balmoral dress shoes with black hose setting them beside the cufflinks and tie. He can pick out his own underwear.

When I return to the bathroom, the steam has abated and taking the towel from my head I begin the process of combing and drying my hair. Every time I do this I promise to go get a shorter haircut. Christian would hit the roof, but then he doesn't have to deal with caring for it. I asked Ron once why men like long hair. Without skipping a beat he said, ''Cause it looks good when you're naked.' Passing the hairdryer willy-nilly through my hair I create a cloud of natural curls that frame my face and spill over my forehead. I'll use a brush to straighten it later. Returning the hair dryer to its place, I jump as two familiar arms circle my waist and pull me against a chiseled chest. "Oh, you scared me." I sigh as I lean back into Christian. He brushes my hair away from my neck and nuzzles his nose against my ear. "What are you doing?" I ask as a smile creeps across my face.

"Shhh."

Letting out a whimper as his lips press against my neck and his breath drifts over my skin, my heart races and my blood begin to course. Taking me by my waist he turns me around to face him and my arms circle his neck as our mouths quickly find each other. His tongue gently glides across my lips, tempting and teasing; asking me to open to him. I gladly comply and his tongue moves with mine allowing me to relish the vibration as a moan leaves his chest and falls into my mouth. Without breaking our kiss, he tugs at the belt to my robe and it falls open allowing him to move his hands underneath it. The warmth of his hands against my skin is electric and I pull him closer needing more of him. His fingers traverse my skin and he glides them up my ribcage until he finds my breasts; cupping them in his hands, massaging and rubbing his thumbs over my nipples until they are straining against his fingers, begging for his attention. As he lowers his head, his teeth and tongue travel over the mounds of my breasts before he takes one in his mouth sucking and pulling, licking and tugging. I bend my head down so my cheek rests against his hair as I cup his head pressing his mouth firmly against my needy flesh begging for more. Lighting a fire against my skin with his mouth he releases my breast with a parting kiss and his arms circle, pulling me close, as our mouths once again find each other and his lips hungrily move over mine .

"Don't I get a hello?" I manage to murmur against his lips.

"Ummm." He growls under his breath, never stopping his amorous assault.

He brushes my cheek with the back of his hand then softly traces a finger over my skin. My God what he can do to me. Starting at my jaw, his fingertip gently trails down my neck and between my breasts, making my tummy quiver as he continues to my navel, stopping momentarily to trace a circle around my belly button. I lost any will to resist him when he kissed my neck and I totally surrender when he moves down and he pulls his finger through the part of my body nestled between the top of my thighs.

"Hmmm. You're not ready yet." He grumbles as his tongue continues to engage mine. Without skipping a beat he lifts me and sets me on the vanity. Parting my robe, he kisses my breasts again, and then parts my thighs so he can stand between them. I'm exposed to him in the most intimate way and I don't care. My lack of modesty only fuels his desire and his mouth follows mine as I lean back against the mirror; his hands slid up and down my parted legs and his thumbs caress my inner thighs coming closer to my engorged flesh with each stroke.

"What are you doing?" I try to gasp as I slip my arms out of my robe leaving me totally naked before him.

"Shhh."

His lips burn into my skin with each kiss that he leaves from my jaw down my neck and chest stopping to pay homage to my breasts now heavy with need. His mouth continues the journey down to my navel then finally, with his hands on my thighs, he nuzzles his nose in the dark curls that reside below, taking in my scent.

My back arches in response and I gasp as he lowers his head and his mouth finds me. "Oh, fuck, Christian." The first touch of his tongue is like winning the lottery; like a dream come true each and every time it happens.

"Shhh." Is all he will utter as he begins to move his tongue over me; softly and gently manipulating the flesh underneath it. His lips find the engorged, needy spot and he takes it in his mouth sucking and gently pulling as his tongue circles and circles. All of my senses are concentrated on the point where we meet; the sounds, the smells, the sight as I watch him and the feel of his exquisite touch. Without thinking my hand moves down to tangle in his hair and as I look down at him our eyes meet as I watch him; my eyes expressing need and his a singular desire to fill that need. The erotic intoxication is fueled by the prickle of his five o'clock shadow against my sensitive inner thighs and he groans as his tongue darts in and out of me then quickly begins to circle again. The vibration as he groans against me is exhilarating and I squirm as his fingers press into my flesh trying to hold me close. Again tugging me between his lips he begins to gently suck and move his tongue quickly, caressing and stroking.

Beads of perspiration tickle as they form between my breasts and gather to drip down and pool in my quivering navel. My body tenses and tightens as my tummy trembles and jumps with each circle his tongue makes, causing me to pant for breath. Looking down again my eyes meet his. Unable to speak, I can only urge him on with my gaze as my body responds to him. All I can do is lose myself in his eyes as he watches me fall. My body involuntarily relaxes as it prepares to accept my climax. As promised, the exquisite phenomenon follows and consumes me_; la mort exquise petite_. My body curls forward and my mind turns off as I loose myself in him as Christian continues sucking and caressing until every last spasm is wrung from me. Wet with perspiration, my body finally goes limp and he moves higher, beginning his trail of kisses upward; over my abdomen, up my tummy, stopping to touch each breast now flushed pink, up my neck and finally finding my mouth again. He cups my face in his hands twisting my hair in his fingers as he deepens his kiss. My fumbling fingers search to find his belt, and they manage to unbuckle it then unzip his trousers. My hand snakes through the open fly and through the opening in his boxers to finally find him. He is in my hand, warm and firm and wanting, with the first wet trace of his arousal forming. The sensation is that of holding warm, hard twitching velvet.

"Fuck," he whispers against my lips. With that he divests himself of his slacks and boxers in one move, finishing by peeling away his shirt and exposing the sinew and firm musculature of his chest. Finally he is gloriously and magnificently naked before me; is body perfect, warm, needy and ready to worship me. His need is confirmed by his ripe manhood, and he moves back between my knees and circles his arms around me. His palm skims my leg and he cups my thigh raising it and placing it at his waist, "Hold on to me, " he whispers. I comply trapping his waist with my legs as my arms grasp his neck and he lifts me from the counter walking over to the shower entwined. His foot pries the shower door open as we enter and suddenly the tiles on the shower wall are cold against my back as he presses me against the wall of the stall. His hands grasp and cup my bottom cheeks as he supports me, still pressing his mouth to mine. There is kissing and panting, and wanting and needing. Desire and passion thicken the air that surrounds us fueling our urgency.

We moan in unison as he thrusts upward allowing himself to partially enter me. I respond by rolling my hips forward allowing him to glide in filling me with ease. My body knows him, it recognizes him and I quickly accommodate him. "Oh fuck," he moans as he begins to force himself in and then pull out repeatedly. I can hear the grunt of the air being forced out of his chest with every upward lunge. Christian buries his head in the crook of my neck as he moves faster and harder, forcing me against the cold tile on the wall with every upward thrust he makes.

Securing me in his arms, and with our bodies still joined, he backs up moving away from the wall. I tighten my grip with my legs and cling to him as he lowers himself to his knees, then places me on the floor and hovers over me. I love looking up at him when we fuck. This is my favorite position and I eagerly pull my knees to my chest for him. As he props on his forearms, he begins to circle and roll his hips forcing his way in deeper and with more determination. My hands move up to cup his head and I knot his hair in my fingers forcing his mouth to mine. His breath is warm as it escapes his mouth and falls into mine and he gently bites my lower lip as he continues his ragged drive to his orgasm. Trembling over me, he furiously circles and rolls and thrusts his hips meeting mine. His eyes glazed over with urgency, he moves up to brace on his hands and I lurch backward with every thrust of his hips; my breasts jolting upward with every sudden entry.

As I look up into his eyes I can see the mask that falls over his face as his neck muscles strain and his skin flushes. I love that I am the only one to see him like this. I am the one who can make him feel like this. He takes in one last deep breath and stills. "Fuck," he whispers as he begins to tremble and quiver over me and he loses himself in his pleasure. His muscles jerk and spasm against me as he drowns in ecstasy riding out his release. Beads of sweat trail down is neck and chest then fall to collect on my abdomen mingling with my own. As the flush subsides he finds his breath, his muscles relax and he falls on me and trails kisses over my face and chest.

Still panting, he looks down into my eyes , "I'm sorry," he whispers as I feel his hand move and his fingers glide into the wet region between my legs. "I didn't mean to leave you wanting." He has not moved and is still inside me as he begins to stroke and caress me.

"You don't have to." I gasp.

"I know." He whispers in my ear and kisses my neck. "I want to."

It doesn't take but a few strokes and I am falling over the edge. I'm shredded again; falling apart around him, my body pulling and caressing, enticing him not to leave me. "That's my girl." He whispers and his mouth forms a smile against my neck. In a few moments we are lying entwined on the floor of our shower panting for breath. "Hi, Honey. I'm home." He smiles over at me and chuckles.

"Hi there yourself." I smile back. "I was wondering if you were going to speak to me or if you were playing the part of some sort of sex burglar; sneaking in and stealing my favors."

"I didn't have to steal much," he grins still trying to steady his breath. "I've been thinking about this all day. I didn't get a lick of work done. I just kept thinking about my head between those soft thighs."

"Well, I'm glad I crossed your mind." I reach over and stroke his cheek.

" I wanted you across my desk," he smiles.

* * *

"Christian?"

"Yeah."

"We need to make plans with the kids this weekend." I tell him as I walk out of the dressing room carrying my heels.

"Okay." He answers as he tucks in his shirt and zips his trousers. "Anything special?"

"No. I think they are feeling a little abandoned right now. You've been working long hours on the Vanderberg deal and I made two trips to Sacramento lately." I explain as I try to step into my gray and beige sandal pumps that coordinate with the gray, color block St. John cocktail dress. I lose my balance and Christian catches me as I fall stopping myself against his dresser.

"Careful. Here let me." He kneels down and places my hand on his shoulder for balance as he places a shoe on my foot adjusting the ankle strap. "Okay. Other one." I lift my other foot and he places the shoe on it.

"Thank you sweetheart. I just lost my balance. I swear, I can be so clumsy some times."

"My pleasure." He softly kisses my knee and glides his hand up my bare leg before he stands up to finish getting dressed. "You look nice."

"Thanks. So do you." I stand in front of him and help adjust his tie after he gets it tied, then smooth his collar over it.

"I like that dress, is it new?" he gives me a once over with his eyes.

"Yes. I bought it the same day I got the black one. This one was much more reasonable and more conservative."

"It looks good on you. But then you make anything look good."

Giving him a smirk, "You've already gotten lucky once this evening."

He raises his eyebrows, "Can't blame me for trying for round two."

"Horny little bastard aren't you? _Thank god_." I give him a wink.

"No more so than you, Mrs. Grey. _Thank God_." He returns my wink.

Christian and I arrive at the Four Seasons with Taylor driving and Harold and Maggi join us in the limo. It's a Mercedes Pullman and only holds four, so Harold Jr., Bruce and their wives follow in the SUV being driven by Sawyer. As they settle in we drive off to dinner in a private dining room at Christian's club to celebrate the fruits of my husband's labor.

Entering the elevator on our way to the restaurant, Christian and I move to the back to allow everyone room. As usual, it doesn't take long before I am blessed with Christian's hand gently moving over my derriere and giving me a quick squeeze. Without looking up, my lips part and form a smile at the all too familiar gesture, and my arm snakes around his waist giving him a gentle squeeze to acknowledge his token. As is usual my hand slips below his belt and I return his gesture. When the elevator glides to a halt and the doors open, everyone begins to exit giving me a clear view of Harold quickly removing his palm from Maggie's backside. I have to smile as I realize that love and affection truly have no expiration date.

Christian has procured a lovely private dining room and the table has been laid with beautiful flower arrangements, as well as silver and crystal that reflect under the candlelight. As Christian and Harold talk and joke Maggie and I talk of children, and long periods of time without our husbands. She even asks about Christian's horrible episode in Colombia, yet is elegant enough not to mention the shooting last year or the ugly news reports associated with it. For some reason my mind keeps escaping to the vision of Maggie thrust against a shower wall supported by a huffing and perspiring Harold.

Several bottles of Bollinger later, augmented by some scotch and a few glasses of wine everyone is happy and enjoying our dinner. Even the Vanderberg offspring seem relaxed and happy with the day's events. Our meal is topped off with a snifter of Remy Martin Cognac Black Pearl Louis XIII. A ridiculously expensive old cognac that Christian has kept in his personal reserve at the club for exceptional occasions such as this one. A last toast and our evening with the Vanderbergs is finally coming to an end.

"Ana, everything was lovely. We have thoroughly enjoyed the evening." Maggie smiles over at me as we wash our hands in the ladies lavatory. The attendant hands us each a warm hand towel to dry our fingers.

"I'm so glad we got to spend time with you and Harold. I've so enjoyed meeting you."

"We've known Christian for years, it's just a shame that you weren't with him on some of his trips to Pittsburgh. We would have enjoyed meeting you sooner."

"I would have enjoyed it to. I guess I was home having babies and keeping up with children." I have to smile.

"I thoroughly understand. Now that ours are grown and gone I'm so looking forward to it being just Harold and me. I want to get to know my husband again- over and over again." She gives me a sly grin.

"I understand. It's so wonderful to see a couple that thoroughly enjoy each other after being together as long as you and Harold have. I hope Christian and I are that way thirty years from now."

"Well the secret is that Harold and I genuinely like each other. He's my best friend. Has been for over forty years. I think you and Christian will be the same way. Christian didn't seem to play the field a lot when he was younger; with his looks, he certainly could have. He concentrated on work mostly until he met you. There was a point when Harold almost thought that Christian didn't have an interest in girls. I guess he was just waiting and once he found what he wanted…that was it. "

"So you knew Christian before we got married?"

"Oh yes. We met him back when he was just getting started. He had an interest in a few of Harold's holdings way back then. He made several trips to Pittsburg to try to talk Harold into parting with some of his companies. Harold liked him from the start even if he didn't let Christian buy anything. Said he saw himself in '_the boy'_. That's what he calls him '_the boy'_. Not to his face mind you." She chuckles. "That's why when he decided to sell, Christian was his first choice. He knows Christian will take care of his baby."

" I know Christian certainly admires Harold. I'm sure Harold's baby will be safe with Christian. Well, I suppose they will be waiting on us." The attendant opens the door for us and we walk back to our table. Before dropping everyone at their hotel, Christian and I make sure Maggie and Harold promise come to visit and Harold is welcome to stop by GEH anytime to see how things are faring with the parts of GEH that were once Vanderberg Industries.

On the ride back home, Christian loosens his tie and unbuttons the top of his shirt then he reaches down and pulls my feet into his lap. As he does, I slide back on the seat. He pulls my shoes off and drops them to the floor and begins to massage my tired feet, pressing his thumbs into my arches and rolling his fingertips over the muscles. "Oh, my God that's so good." I groan.

"Maggie and Harold liked you. They liked you a lot." He tells me with a grin as he works on my feet.

"I liked them a lot. I had no idea you had known them for so long. Maggie said they met you years ago when you first started in business."

"Yep. I was a kid trying to land a big fish and Harold took pity on me," he snorts. "He took me under his wing, so to speak, and I learned a lot from him. I think that's why our companies are so compatible. We conduct business a lot alike."

"Hmm. Are you going to rub my feet all the way home or are you going to come over here and make out with me."

Christian grins and releases his hold on my toes, "What feet?"

* * *

After a nice bath and slipping into a beige silk gown, I slide in next to Christian.

"Mmmm. You feel good." I tell him as I snuggle against his bare chest in the dark and he wraps his arms around me. After lying quietly for a moment, I let out a quiet giggle.

"What?" Christian looks down at me.

"Did you see Maggie and Harold in the elevator at the club?"

"You mean when he had his hand all over her ass?"

"Yes. Wasn't it cute?"

"Cute? I love her, but there's nothing cute about Maggie's sixty year old ass."

"Christian. One day I'll have a sixty year old ass. I certainly hope you'll still think it's cute. I'll still like yours."

"Baby as long as you're still giving it up to me then, I'll worship your sixty year old ass."

"You are so mean. I just hope at sixty you still want what I have."

"I don't care how old you get, I'll still want it."

"Do you think you'll remember what to do with it?"

"I'll make sure to write it down just in case I forget."

"Just don't try to get too fancy. I wouldn't want you to break a hip."

"Yeah. And I'll probably lose all my teeth and I won't be able to bite your neck….." He rolls over on me and pretends to bite me while I giggle and struggle to get loose. We both laugh as we roll around and tussle under the sheets. Suddenly my phone rings and we both stop.

"Was that your phone? At this hour?" he asks. His question is answered when it rings again.

I break free of him and sit up to answer it. "Hello?"….. "Can you turn on the light?" I whisper to Christian.

"Mrs. Grey?"

"Yes. This is Mrs. Grey."

"Who is it?" Christian whispers and I hold up my palm to him, "Just a minute." I whisper back.

"Mrs. Grey. This is Karen Paulson. I'm one of the sitters staying with Tommy Blakely. I'm sorry to call you so late, but I called earlier and you were out."

"Yes. Karen. What's going on?"

"Who is Karen?" Christian whispers to me.


	56. Chapter 56

_**Fifty Shades…Full Circle**_

_**Chapter 56**_

I put my hand over the phone, "She's one of the nursing students I hired to sit with Tommy." I whisper to him.

"Yes, Karen. It's fine we were out. What's going on?"

"What does she want?" Christian whispers to me.

"Excuse me a moment Karen." I again put my hand over the phone. "Christian I'm trying to find out. Just wait a minute and I'll tell you as soon as I know what's going on. Now hush."

"I'm sorry Karen."

"Well, I just wanted to let you know that they are going to discharge Tommy Monday morning."

"Really? He must be much better."

"He's better, but he still isn't well. I mean he's still a sick little boy and will need care at home."

"Has his mother been in much?"

"Some. Sporadically. She saw the social worker this morning when she was here. I think they had a disagreement, because she left right after that."

"Did she say anything? Is she going to try to take him home?"

"I don't think so. The social worker said that they would be here Monday to take him to a foster home for a while."

"Oh. I see." My heart sinks and I can't think about him going to foster care. " And Lorna didn't say anything about coming to Seattle or anything?"

"No ma'am. She just looked mad and left. I haven't seen her since then."

"Okay."

"I'm sorry to call so late, but you said it was important to let you know anything that happened."

"Yes. I did. And I appreciate your diligence. You can call me any hour day or night. I'll be in touch before he's discharged, okay?"

"Sure, Mrs. Grey."

"Thank you Karen. Get some rest."

"Okay. Bye, Mrs. Grey."

"Well?" Christian looks over at me.

"Well, that was Karen."

"I know that. What did she want at this hour?"

"She had evidently been trying to get in touch with me. I must have turned my phone off earlier. They are releasing Tommy from the hospital Monday."

"Have you heard anything from the girl?" he asks.

"No. I haven't. Karen said the social worker is coming to take Tommy to a foster home on Monday."

"I'm sorry, Baby." He leans over and kisses my cheek. "I know you're disappointed."

"I guess I'll need to go to Sacramento Monday morning to pick him up."

"What?" He knits his eyebrows and then shakes his head, " No."

"Christian I told the social worker, we'd take care of Tommy until Lorna goes to rehab or ,…"

"Or what? Ana, we are not foster parents and you are not bringing that child here."

"Christian, I told Tommy I wouldn't let him go to a foster home." I need for him to know just how important this is; how much it means to me.

"He's young. He won't remember what you've told him."

"But, I don't understand. How can we let him get swallowed up in the system?" I'm sitting here totally blindsided by Christian's reaction. It never dawned on me he'd object to us taking care of Tommy.

"Ana, remember I told you it was fine to get involved in this as long as you didn't let it touch our family? That includes bringing him to this house."

"But, Christian, he's just a baby. He's the same age as Grace. Would you want Grace to go into foster care?"

"Ana, don't start with that. You aren't going to guilt me into this. I know where you're going and it isn't going to happen." I can see the determination in his eyes and I know he isn't going to budge on this.

"How can you say that? Where would you be without Grace and Carrick?"

"I'd be Jack Hyde is where I'd be. I'd be permanently fucked up and I'd be in jail."

"God, don't even talk about that." I roll my eyes and rub my hand across my face.

Christian sits up cross legged in the bed and takes a deep breath then audibly exhales. "Look Ana, I know what you want to do. But I've been there. I know how fucked up kids can get and I know how hard they can be to deal with. Even the sweet lovable ones can have real issues. I don't want that thrust on our children. I don't want Teddy and Grace to have to endure what I forced on Elliott and Mia."

"But who says he'll be messed up? He seems fine, just scared and hungry."

"Baby," he pulls me to him," they all look scared and hungry and they are, but they can have issues that you can't even imagine. You need to think about Teddy and Grace. They aren't asking to be subjected to that. You said yourself we've been away from them too much lately. How will we have time to devote to a troubled kid?"

"I don't know. But we could try. Can't we?"

"We should have discussed this before it got to this point." He rubs his pals over his eyes, " I had no idea what you were planning."

"I know. I guess I just never thought that you'd object to it. Christian it would only be until Lorna gets help or they find him a good home."

"Ana, he's not a stray dog. You can't just bring him into our home and then give him away when they find him parents. Besides, you can't just decide that you want to be a foster parent and do it."

"Why?"

"Because you have to go to classes and your home has to be inspected and you have to be investigated. There are a million hoops to jump through before you can take in a foster child." I lean in to him and he circles his arms around me." Besides, say we did take him and by some fucking miracle he didn't have a million issues, what happens to Teddy and Grace when he has to go to be adopted. Teddy can't part with Jack, I can't imagine him parting with a…. a.."

"Brother?" I ask.

"I guess. So you see it's not fair to anyone. Sweetheart, please just let the system do what it's designed to do. They'll make sure he's taken care of."

"Christian?"

"What, sweetheart?"

"Does this have anything to do with you?"

"Me?"

"Yes. Does Tommy remind you of your situation? Is this something that would be painful for you?" I search his face to try to see what he's thinking.

"I..I can't honestly say that it wouldn't be a reminder. But I just don't think it's a good idea for any of us."

"I wonder if Gail and Taylor would want him?"

He backs up to look at me, "Gail and Taylor?"

"Yes. Gail said she had wanted children at one time, but never got to have any. Maybe this would be an opportunity for them."

"Ana, don't go asking Jason and Gail to take this child in. I've never once heard them even mention wanting a child. They work for us and it wouldn't be fair to pressure them into something."

"I'd never do that. They just came to mind."

He kisses my forehead and gives me a hug. "Come here." He lies down and pulls me to him and strokes my hair. "Baby. I know you and you have the biggest heart I've ever seen. You'd take in every parentless child, every homeless animal and every hopelessly fucked up billionaire you find."

"Luckily I only found one billionaire and he wasn't so hopeless."

"See? You just see the best in everyone and everything. You never see the downside to a situation."

"What's the point in only seeing the bad and the ugly in things?"

"Because then you aren't disappointed when you're let down."

"But I'd rather be disappointed than always expecting the worst."

"I know. And that's why I love you so fucking much. Try to put it out of your mind. You've done what you can for them. And there's no harm in making sure he gets what he needs, just try to do it from Seattle. Okay?"

Silence.

"Ana? Okay?" he repeats.

"I'll try."

* * *

After tossing and turning most of the night I don't wake when Christian gets up. When my eyes do flutter open, I can hear the strains of, Viva la Vida, in Christian's voice coming from the bathroom over the sound of the shower. I turn over and punch my pillow snuggling back down for a few more seconds of sleep. I'm lifted back out of sleep by water dripping down my cheek. "What are you doing?" I growl.

"I'm kissing your shoulders." Christian murmurs as his lips skim over my bare back.

"You're wet and dripping on me." I grumble, turning over to look up at him.

With that Christian shakes his head like a wet dog showering water all over me.

"HEY. STOP IT." I bark at him.

"You're grumpy this morning."

"I know. I just didn't sleep well and I don't really want all that water on me." Mumbling, I turn back over and sink into my pillow.

"You want to sleep a while longer?" he asks.

"Uh hum. Just a few more minutes."

"I'll get dressed and fix the kids some breakfast. Go back to sleep."

Oh, shit. "You're gonna' what?"

"I'll fix the kids some breakfast."

"No. I'm up. Just don't touch anything in the kitchen." I tell him as I drag myself to a sitting position.

He grins over at me, rubbing one towel over his head and another towel hanging low on his hips, "You did that on purpose just to get me up, didn't you?" I ask.

"Whatever works." he gives me a big grin. "No really, I'll be glad to feed them. I know my culinary skills are adequate to prepare Cheerios."

"Oh, okay." I flop back down pulling the sheet back up to my chin. "I guess you can't mess up a jug of milk and a cardboard box of cereal. Have at it Emeril, and if you run into a problem, Teddy can walk you through it."

"MOM!" I awaken to the soft tones of my son's voice in my ear.

"Humm?" my eyes open to see Teddy's gray eyes about an eyelash length from mine. "What is it baby?" I croak.

"Mom. I think you need to come downstairs," he whispers against my face.

"Okay." My eyes close again. "What's going on?"

"Well…um..Dad…um he's making pancakes…and…um…"

I push up off of my pillow and turn around to sit up. "What?" I'm now fully awake.

"Um….Grace wanted pancakes and….um…Dad said he'd make 'em and …..I think you'd better come."

"Okay, baby. I'm getting up." I plant my feet on the floor and go the bathroom throwing some water on my face and gargling a little mouthwash. I'll brush later. "What's Daddy doing?" I gurgle before holding my hair back and spitting.

"He said he was going to make special Pan-Daddy-Cakes, but they don't look so good." He makes a yucky face. "He dropped some eggs and they broke, but Jack cleaned 'em up."

I grab his hand and we rush downstairs to the culinary crime scene. I can hear Grace squealing and laughing as I hit the landing. When we enter the family room I can see into the kitchen and Christian is busy at the stove doing god only knows what. When I arrive I want to cry. I carefully walk to the breakfast bar and look over it to see some sort of batter dripped all over the counter and the stove and the floor and Jack.

"Hey, babe." Christian smiles over at me. "You're just in time for breakfast."

"So I see." I gingerly walk around to the look at the gross injustice being done to the kitchen. "Sweetheart? What are you making?" I ask as tactfully as possible. Grace is in the kitchen "helping" and is about as competent as her father is.

"Grace and I are making pancakes." He grins as he ladles some batter from the bowl on the counter and drips it over to the griddle on the stove that is apparently set on high.

"Yeah, Mama. Me and Doddy aw cookin' bwekfasth." I give her a smile and extract my hand from her curls when it encounters 'special' pancake batter.

"Okay. Where did you find a recipe?"

He nods over to his laptop, "I looked it up on line."

"How's it working?" I ask. I have to frown as I notice the batter dripping down the screen and dribbled across the keys, as he has placed the computer between the bowl of batter and the griddle.

"Pretty good. They are a little runny, but I'm cooking them longer to firm 'em up."

"I see. Did you find everything that you need?" I have to wince as I watch the activities.

"Teddy told me where everything was, but, I had to improvise a bit. There wasn't enough flour in the canister so I crushed up some Cherrios to thicken it." He smiles at his daughter, "That was Grace's suggestion."

"Umm."

"And Grace and I decided to add a secret ingredient." God help us. " I decided that it would be easier to add the syrup to the batter, that way you don't have to put it on top."

"That may be why the batter is a little runny." I look over at the griddle as he tries to flip the runny cacophony of ingredients.

"I know it's still a little runny and looks dark on that side, but it's the first batch. The next ones will look better."

I try to give him an encouraging smile.

Teddy is twisting his fingers and looks up at his dad, "Dad, can you let Mom make the pancakes?" he carefully asks.

"What? You'll like these. Go over and have a seat at the table and I'll have 'em ready in a couple of minutes."

Poor Teddy climbs up in his chair looking like he is going to his own execution.

"Grace, you can go get in your booster chair." He tells her, but she is too busy feeding Cheerios to Jack to notice.

"Sweetheart, I think Jack has had enough breakfast for now." I try to pry the soggy 'O's from her hand.

"Christian, I think they're burning." I nod and mention as I grab a sponge and try to clean up a bit of the batter explosion.

"Naw. They're going to be crisp. I like them that way. Gail never gets them crisp enough." He reassures me.

"But, pancakes aren't really supposed to be crisp, baby."

"I'm, taking care of this. I can do it. Just grab some plates so I can take these up," he orders me.

Doing as I am told I hand him a stack of four plates.

"Aw they weady yet, Doddy?" Grace has such confidence in her father's ability.

"Almost, sugar. "

"Christian, are you sure you don't want some help? I'll be glad to….."

"Can you get the kids something to drink and grab the butter?" he dismisses me.

I do as I'm told and join the kids at the table waiting for the fruits of his labor. As I watch him flip the mess onto the plates, I can't take my eyes off his butt. He's in his cotton PJ bottoms and a T-shirt, with bare feet. He may be one awful cook but I sure do like watching him do it.

Christian soon appears at the table and hands out the plates with the crispy, sticky, goo laced with Cherrios. He looks up at all of us as we stare in amazement at our plates, "Dig in."

Grace picks up one with her fingers and takes a bite. "AAGGGG. Doddy. Not good." She violently shakes her head and spits it out on her plate.

Poor Teddy carefully sticks out his tongue and touches it to the mess and quickly tosses it back to the plate, too polite to say anything.

God knows I love him, so I take a bite with my fork and put it in my mouth as he watches me. I try to smile as I choke through trying to chew the stuff and swallow.

Finally Christian takes a bite and chews about twice before standing up and collecting the plates. He carries them to the kitchen and dumps them all in the garbage can. Then grabs the bowl of batter and dumps it in the garbage along with all of the kitchen utensils and the left over ingredients. I get up and walk in and put my arms around his waist, " You gonna' throw the laptop away too? They weren't that bad."

"Yes they were. They were fucking awful." He grumbles.

"Well, don't throw everything in the garbage. I can wash the plates and bowls and utensils."

"I just want it all gone. I can manage billions of dollars and thousands of people, but I can't make fucking pancakes."

"But you tried. It makes us all happy to know that you wanted to do it for us." I try to give him some comfort and walk around to his front pulling him to me in a hug and nuzzle my nose in his chest. "You just need some practice, that's all."

"I had a recipe. Why would they put a recipe on a food site, on the internet, if it doesn't work?" He growls.

"Well, they usually work, but you can't just go adding secret ingredients to it. It throws it off." I try to explain.

Looking up I pull his lips to mine, "I love you for trying," then press my lips to his. "Besides, you are one sexy ass cook, Mr. Grey."

"Oh yeah?" he grins at me.

"Most definitely."

"Good Grief. You guys kiss over awful pancakes." Teddy grumbles as he stands in the kitchen looking up at us.

Christian pulls me closer and never taking his eyes off of me, "Go get dressed, Teddy. I'm taking us out to breakfast." As Teddy turns to stomp out, "And take Grace with you."

* * *

We are finally back after a decadent iHOP breakfast. The kids got pancakes made by experts and Christian got an omelet and I got eggs and bacon with my pancakes. We are in the back yard looking at the big hole in the lawn.

"I think it will be nice when it's finished, don't you?" I ask Christian.

"Yeah. Elliott looks like he's doing a good job." Christian notes as he tosses a tennis ball to Jack.

"I like that it will be a natural setting. The landscaper is going to put the grass up to the edge of the pool and then plants and natural decorative grasses all around it; sort of like a pond or something." I motion with my hands as I describe what the finished product will look like. "And the shallow end will start at a foot deep for the kids. That way they can wade around in it."

"Looks good." Christian says as he takes the tennis ball from Jack and throws it again. Teddy chases Jack trying to get to the ball first, but of course the dog is never going to let that happen.

"What time do we need to be over at the house?" he asks.

"I think you mother said it starts at seven. I guess we should be there about six thirty in case she needs us for anything."

"Okay. Hey, Ted. Here it comes." Christian throws the tennis ball at Teddy across the yard.

Grace has disappeared around the mound of dirt taken from the hole. "Grace? What are you doing?" I walk around to find her.

"I cookin' Mama. I make pancakes wike Doddy." When I round the mound, I find her sitting in the wet dirt patting out some sort of mud pie, thing. "Grace. You are filthy. Look at you. You have mud all over you." There is no need to get upset. She's having a good time and the damage is already done. "Just don't go in the house until I wash you off."

"Okay. Babyyyy I wuv youuuu. Yesth, Baby I wuuuv youuuuu." She is quietly singing to herself as she makes her mud cakes and stacks them in the grass.

After going back in the house to get a bottle of Sancerre, I pour two glasses and walk back out on the patio, where Christian is sitting in a chair watching the kids. I hand him a glass and sit on his lap leaning into him.

"Mmm. Thanks babe. Good."

"You're welcome. It's nice to just have a quiet day for a change." I press my lips to his forehead and he hugs my waist.

"Yep. But don't say that too loudly."

"I got the kitchen all cleaned up. You got batter in places I didn't know existed."

"Thanks. I'm sorry I made such a mess."

"That's okay. Next time just stick to what you know." I rub his back with my palm. "Gail will be over to take care of the kids this evening and she would have keeled over and died if she had seen her kitchen looking like that."

"Yeah." he snorts. "She would have killed me first."

"She would have been too stunned to see you in the kitchen, to kill you."

"The next time I experiment with food, it will be in our bedroom and I'll use you for the plate." He growls to me.

"Now that I'll go along with. Especially if you plan on adding a few secret ingredients." I give him a hug and he buries his face between my breasts and gives me a bit of a motorboat.

"Ahhh. Stop." I giggle back. "You are hopeless."

"Holy fuck, look at Grace." He says as Grace walks toward us.

"I know. She did it before I knew it. I just let her enjoy herself. I'll take the hose to her and rinse her down before she goes in the house."

I get out of his lap and set my wine down. As I vacate his lap, Grace runs toward him with her arms outstretched. "Doddy. Wook wha I made you."

"That's nice sweetheart." He jumps back and grabs her arms to avoid the mud.

"Come here, baby." I grab her and begin to strip off her clothes, leaving her in her panties. "You are one filthy, little girl." Then I turn on the hose. "Go out and run in the yard."

She does and I angle the hose up to make a shower as she runs through it. She is laughing and squealing as she plays in the water. "Can I get in too?" Teddy runs up and asks.

"Sure. Just get down to your underwear." He strips down and begins to run through the water with Grace and now Jack. As I stand on the patio and spray the water, Christian comes from behind and wraps his arms around my waist. He presses his lips against my cheek and I can feel him smile against my neck as he looks out at the kids.

"Don't you wish you were that age again? No problems. No worries. Just having a good time," he asks.

"Nope. You and I both had problems and worries when we were their age. I like things just as they are now."

"Hmm. I guess you're right. They just look so happy."

"That's because they are happy. We've been able to give our kids a life we never had." I sigh. "Are you sure we don't have just a little room for someone else?" I ask.

"No. Let's not go there."

"Okay. I just thought…"

"I know what you just thought….and I'm not going to even entertain it. Discussion closed."

"Will you go in and bring me a couple of towels to dry these two off?"

"Sure. Where do I get them?"

"What? Really? You don't know where Gail keeps the towels?"

He shrugs, "No. Whenever I need one it's always hanging on the towel rack in the bathroom."

"Well, you poor little rich boy." I have to smirk at him. "Look in the closet in the laundry room. You know where the laundry room is don't you?"

"I think so. It's that place with the washer and dryer in it. Right?" he gives me a sarcastic look.

"Right. Those two big square appliances with round windows on the front." I have to chuckle.

In a few minutes he's back. "Here. Your phone is ringing." I hand him the hose and take my phone from him.

"Hello?"

"Um. Is this Mrs. Grey?"

"Yes. Is this Lorna?"

"Yeah. Yeah. Look I did some thinkin' and…uh ..if your offer is still open. You know about coming up there and…uh. Goin' to the rehab place. I…uh."

"Oh. Lorna. Of course the offer is still open." I look over at Christian who is staring at me. "Are you ready to come to Seattle, sweetheart?"


	57. Chapter 57

_**Fifty Shades…Full Circle**_

_**Chapter 57**_

I can hear Lorna sobbing on the other end of the phone. "Sweetheart. Did you hear me? Do you want me to come get you?"

"Um. They are going to take my baby away."

"I know. Lorna, this is the only way, sweetheart."

"Okay. Yeah. I thought about it and…uh. I think I can do it. Yeah. I wanna' try to do this."

"Okay. I think they are letting Tommy out of the hospital Monday. Can you be ready to go then?"

"Yeah. I don't have a lot."

"Lorna, you don't have to pack anything. We can get you and Tommy what you need when we get back to Seattle. Don't worry about it."

"But I need to get some of his toys. He'll want those."

"That's fine. Lorna, I'll be at the hospital Monday morning at nine a.m. I'll need to meet with the social worker so we can get Tommy released to us and bring you both back to Seattle. I have a private plane so as soon as Tommy is released we'll get in the car and go directly to the airfield. I'll make sure you and Tommy get to Seattle safely. "

"Okay. I'll be there."

" And Lorna, make sure you bring the phone I gave you with you. I don't want anyone to get hold of it and try to find you in Seattle. Lorna, please don't change your mind. "

"I won't. I'll be there. I promise."

"Okay. Try not to think about it too much. If you get scared, please call me. Please don't let anyone talk you into changing your mind."

"I won't. I need to do this for Tommy. I need to try to be a better Mom."

"Sweetheart, you are doing the best thing for him you can possibly do. He needs you and I want you to get better so you can take care of him."

"Yeah. Okay. I'll see you Monday at nine."

"Thank you. Thank you so much. I'll see you then."

I end the call and look over at Christian, who is drying Grace off with a towel. " I take it that was the girl?"

"Yes. Christian, she's decided to come to Seattle and go to rehab. I'm going to go get her Monday morning."

"I'm going with you."

"What? Christian, you don't have to go. I can do this."

I grab a towel and start to dry Teddy off. "Come here baby. You look like a popsicle."

"Where are you and daddy going?" he asks through chattering teeth.

"I have to make a quick trip to California Monday morning sweetie, but I'll be back that afternoon. You won't even know I'm gone." I kiss his nose. "How did you get so cold?"

"You are not going without me this time." Christian is firm. "I'll call Stephen and have him get the plane ready to leave first thing Monday and then let Flynn know to be ready to admit her to Lakeside."

My eyes lock with his. "Thank you." That's all I need to say for him to understand just how much I love him.

He gives me a smile and a slight nod. "You're welcome."

* * *

Christian is sitting in a chair bent over tying his shoes as I leave my dressing room and walk over stopping in front of him. He looks up at my shoes, those black shoes he can't get enough of. Then his eyes follow up my legs and upward until his eyes meet mine.

"Fuck. I give good gifts." He gasps.

"Yes. You certainly do give good gifts, Mr. Grey."

I have on my new black Lanvin with misty black hose and those black shoes. My hair is sleeked back in a tight chignon and I'm wearing my second chance diamond earrings. I used more than my normal amount of eye make-up making my eyes smoky and have a pale lipstick and gloss.

"Damn. You look fucking hot." He tells me as he stands up. "I was wondering how that dress was going to look, but… you just look so different."

"I wanted to change it up a bit. I just got tired of the same old conservative cocktail dresses. So you really like it?"

"Definitely. And by the way, I'll be taking it off of you when we get home, so don't go racing to get undressed."

I cock my head to look at him. "Oh really?"

"Oh, yes…. really." He circles my waist. "I'm going to peel it off of you with my fucking teeth." He whispers against my neck. "Christian." He murmurs in my ear.

"What?" I ask as he cups my neck in his hands, his thumbs against my cheeks and stares into my eyes.

"It's my name. Remember it, because I'm going to make you scream it until you lose the ability to speak." He brushes his lips over mine, almost touching them and leaving a trail of warm breath against my face.

I feel as though I could pass out, but instead roll my eyes and fan myself with my hand. "Goodness, this is going to be a long cocktail party."

I grab my beaded evening bag and wrap as Christian shrugs into his suit jacket. "We look pretty good." I tell him.

"Pretty good? Shit. We look fucking good enough to eat , which is just what we're going to do when we get home." Christian takes my elbow and we head downstairs to the car waiting on us. Taylor is driving, because Gail is keeping the kids and Christian will be drinking this evening.

* * *

"Ana. Ana." I look around and see the gorgeous whirlwind making her way to me. " Oh, my God I love that dress. You look so different. Really hot. And I love those shoes. Where did you find those?"

"You helped me pick them out Mia. Remember?" I tell her as we give each other a hug.

"Oh. I thought they looked familiar. But they look great with that dress. Where did you get it? I'd give anything to be able to wear that."

"It was a gift from my husband." I smile over at Christian as he rolls his eyes.

"Oh, Christian. You are just the best." She grabs Christian in a neck hug." I can't believe you picked out a dress for Ana."

"I didn't, Mia. She picked it out herself. Now calm down before you jostle that baby loose." He pries her hands from around his neck.

"Oh, I'm just glad to see you both. We haven't gotten together in ages. Oh, by the way, I think we found a house. Christian, it's just beautiful. You'll love it. It's on the lake and it has a huge yard. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you."

"Okay, okay. Just have the realtor get in touch with my accountant and he'll make the arrangements. I'm sure it's lovely. Just take it down a notch."

"Hi Ethan. How's it going?" Christian offers his hand to his new brother-in-law.

"Good. Things are good. Never a dull moment around the Kavanagh house."

"You look tired." Christian muses.

"I am a bit actually. This pregnancy stuff is a bit overwhelming." Poor Ethan rubs his hand over his forehead.

"Oh, he's just worn out. You know how these hormones are the first few months. I just can' seem to keep my hands off of him." Mia giggles and plants a kiss on her husband's cheek.

"Sis, I'm not listening to this." Christian slaps Ethan on the shoulder. "You're on your own with this one. I need a drink."

Christian makes his way to the bar that has been set up on the patio out back. Soon he returns with a gin and tonic for himself and a Pimm's for me. "Here you go."

"Thanks, Sweetheart." I take a sip as I continue my conversation with Kate and Christian makes his way over to Elliott to talk about the hole in the back yard.

"So, I see you got that hideous cast off of you wrist." Kate notices.

"Yes. It just came off Thursday. I'm glad to be rid of it."

"I never asked you about that remnant of a handcuff you had on your wrist at the hospital. You and Christian still…." She raises her eyebrows and rolls her eyes over at me.

"On occasion, yes we still…"

"Steele, if you had told me eight years ago, I'd never have believed it. Little Annie Steele. Married to and having kinky sex with one of the richest, best looking men in the United States."

"World."

"Huh?"

"The world. Christian just doubled his holdings yesterday."

"What? You're kidding." She looks astonished her mouth gaping open.

"Nope. He purchased Vanderberg Industries. Closed the deal yesterday."

"I never heard anything about that, and I work for a newspaper."

"I know. He wanted to keep a lid on it until it was done. Now…it's done."

"Well fuck me. Does Elliott know?"

"I have no idea Kate. I think there is a press release coming out Monday, to announce it."

"How rich is he going to get?"

"Who knows? It's like some damn game to him. He loves it. Personally I couldn't care less. We have enough money to last a thousand lifetimes. It gets to a point where you just don't notice it anymore."

"Gee. Must be awful for you." She says in all seriousness. We both break out in laughter.

"I know... right." I almost spew my drink as we giggle.

"What are you girls so happy about?" I hear Grace walk up behind me.

"Oh, nothing. I was just commiserating with Ana over her financial woes." Kate tells her.

"Hello dear." Grace kisses Kate's cheek .

"Hello Ana. You look lovely." We give each other air kisses.

"Thanks Grace. You look beautiful. I love that dress. And the house is just lovely."

"Thank you. I've had the planners here all day getting ready. I think Carrick and I are getting too old for all this party stuff. It's about time Christian and Elliott take over some of this."

"You mean Ana and me?" Kate interjects.

"Yes, Dear. That's exactly what I mean. You and Ana. Husbands are useless at this sort of thing. Unless you're married to Colin Cowie."

"Well, I'll talk to Christian about it. You know how private he is. I doubt he'll want all these people wandering through his house." I try to explain.

"He'll get over it." she smiles.

"Oh, Grace, when you have a few minutes I'd like to talk to you." I ask her.

"About what, Dear?" she asks.

"Well, I just have some questions about when you adopted the kids; what it was like, what problems you ran into. That sort of thing."

She looks at me, "Are you and Christian thinking about adopting?"

"Oh, no. Not really. More of a foster situation. The subject came up and he is just so vehemently against the idea. I just wanted to talk to someone who had done it. Since you and Carrick did it three times, I thought you might have some advice."

"Okay. I'll grab a few minutes later and we can talk. I'll come find you."

"Ana, are you really wanting to adopt?" Kate asks as Grace walks over to greet some new arrivals.

"No. It's a long story. I ran into this young girl on the street in Sacramento. She had a young child, a little boy with her. They were just pitiful, but I just felt something with this boy right off the bat. Anyway, I asked her to call if they ever needed anything."

"You didn't."

"Yes I did. And don't start with me. Anyway the child is in the hospital and Christian and I are taking care of his hospital bills. The girl is obviously on drugs and Child Services is trying to take the boy away from her."

"That sounds reasonable. I mean if the mother is on drugs, she can't possibly take care of him."

"Yes. It's an issue. So anyway, Christian and I offered to send her to rehab and then set her up with a fresh start after that. At first she wouldn't agree to it and I just couldn't stand to think of that child in foster care. I wanted to bring him to live with us until they found him an adoptive family. Christian put his foot down and said no. It just never dawned on me that he wouldn't agree to it."

"Oh Ana. That's taking on a lot of responsibility. I can imagine he would say no."

"Well. As it turns out the mother agreed to go to rehab, so we are going down to pick them up Monday morning and take them to Lakeview."

"They have facilities for the kids there don't they? That's what I've heard."

"Yes. Christian got John Flynn to find a good facility for her and we were lucky that they take the kids."

"So crisis averted?" she asks.

"Yes. For now. I just hope she follows through and lets us check her in. Then I hope she can turn her life around. Kate this child is just adorable. He just stole my heart."

"I know." Kate gives me a sympathetic smile and a hug." You have a big empty spot right now. Just don't rush to anything. Give yourself some time."

"I will." I give her a nod and a smile as I stare down into my drink. "Where are the hors devours? Christian and I got busy and didn't eat any dinner. I'm trying to nurse this drink, but I need something to eat."

"I think there is a buffet set up in the dining room. I'll go with you. Elliott hates it when I have too much to drink. Until he gets me home." She snorts.

"So things sound better on that front." I lower my voice.

"Yeah. Elliott's back to his old self; stubborn as a Billy goat and twice as horny," she laughs.

"Isn't it amazing that he and Christian are so much alike in that department and not a gene shared between them? " I ask.

"Must be nurture instead of nature. Grace and Carrick probably set the example. Can't you just see them going at it like little rabbits?" Kate giggles as she looks over the buffet table. "That Grace must be a wildcat."

"Shhhh. Someone will hear you." I stifle a giggle. " Eat something before you have anything else to drink."

"Hungry babe?" Christian asks as he and Elliott find us at the buffet.

"I figured I'd better eat something before I embarrass all of us." I nod to his glass. "I see you've moved on to scotch."

"Yes. Dad had some 25 year old he wanted me to try. It's quite good." He takes another sip.

Kate and I fill our plates and go out on the patio to eat. I hate trying to balance a plate on my knees while holding on to my drink and trying to eat. But we manage to get some of the finger food eaten. As usual, the food is delicious. After we finish, we stop to get a fresh drink before returning to the house.

"I don't really need another drink. But I want one." I giggle.

"Don't worry. Christian and Elliott have been back to the watering hole several times."

"Good thing we have a driver."

"Oh, how convenient." She says sarcastically." You just happen to have a driver." She snorts. "Oh Ana. Ana. How things have changed."

"Well, you know how Christian is. He knew he'd have something to drink, so he had Taylor drive us."

"Where does one go to purchase a Taylor?" she teases.

"You can't. He and Gail are like family. Christian couldn't get by without him." I tell her as we walk back in to join the party. Christian is in the living room talking to several business acquaintances. "Oh, dear. Looks like he's on another scotch. That means he's had too much to drink."

"I need to go rescue him and get some food down him." I start to walk into the living room.

"Ana. I have a few minutes. Do you still want to talk?" Grace asks me.

"Oh, yes. I would." Grace and I walk to Carrick's study and sit on the leather couch together. "Now what is all this about adoption?"

"Oh, Grace we aren't adopting. I just found a child I thought we might foster for a bit and I had no idea Christian would be so opposed."

"Did he say why?"

"The child's mother is a drug addict and Christian thinks that the child will have too many issues."

"Oh. Well, I guess he has some experience with that," she frowns.

"But Grace, surely all foster children don't automatically come with a boat load of issues."

"No. But some do and they can be pretty overwhelming. That's one reason older children are so hard to adopt. Everyone wants to start with a blank slate instead of taking on a damaged child." She sighs as she thinks for a moment. "There were times with Christian that I got to the point that I though love just wasn't going to be enough. Nothing I did took away his pain and I didn't think he would ever come to trust us. I worried myself sick over him until he married you and seemed to even out emotionally."

"So do you think that adoption is a bad idea?"

"Oh heavens no." She breaks out in a smile. " Look how he turned out. And Elliott and Mia weren't such a problem. Of course Mia was just an infant when we got her. Elliott had come from a good home, he just lost both of his parents at once and had no family." She sighs. "Poor Christian was just a mess. It took every bit of love and patience Carrick and I could muster to deal with him."

"But Christian seems to think that we would be burdening Teddy and Grace if we tried to bring another child into our home." I try to explain. " He says that he inflicted so much on Elliott and Mia and he doesn't want that happening to our kids."

"Children are resilient. Who's not to say that a natural child wouldn't come with issues? Happens all the time. Couples want to have just one more child and they can be born with Trisomy 21, Autism, Klinefelter Syndrome, Prader-Willi Syndrome. There are no guarantees. Quite often the marriage doesn't survive , but you know what? The siblings do fine.

"If you and Christian ever decide to bring another child into your home, I have no doubt that Teddy and Grace will do just fine. There will be a period of adjustment of course. But it will all work out. Now who is this child that you are taken with?"

"Oh, just a child I saw on the street in Sacramento. Which reminds me, I don't know if Christian has approached you or not, but this child's mother is a drug addict. Christian and I are sending her to rehab here in Seattle. The child, Tommy, will be coming with her and he will just be getting out of the hospital. He's had pneumonia and has a history of respiratory problems. We were wondering if you would take him as a patient. I'm sure he'll need to be followed medically."

"Of course, dear. I'd be happy to. Just make sure you get his records, so I have something to go on. How old is he?"

"His mother says he's three and a half. Grace he is just so precious. Blond hair, pale mossy green eyes. Little pink cheeks. He's just a sweetheart."

"I'm sure he is dear. When will he be coming to Seattle?"

"Christian and I are going to pick them up Monday morning and bring them back."

"That soon? Well, just let me know. You can bring him by the office and I'll look at him. I'll be glad to follow him."

"Thanks Grace." I tell her as she stands to leave.

"Ana, don't fall too quickly. It can be devastating to have to let one go after you've become attached. Remember you and Christian are still dealing with the loss of Sam. Give yourselves some time and space."

"I will. I just want to see him get what is best for him. I want to see him taken care of."

"Somehow Darling, I don't believe a word you're saying. Just look out for yourself."

As we walk out of the den, Christian meets us in the hall. "There you are." He sweetly bends down and kisses my neck. "Mmmm I missed you."

"Christian! Stop that. Remember where you are." Grace scolds him.

He straightens up and looks at her. "I know exactly where I am mother. I'm in the hall of my parent's home and I'm nibbling on the neck of my beautiful wife."

"Like I said. Stop it. Now. Before you embarrass all of us." She straightens her dress and gives him a sideways glare and a wink.

"I'll handle him Grace. Thank you." I try to control the situation.

"Sweetheart? Have you eaten anything?" I ask him.

"I'm not hungry. Except for you." He tries to give me 'the look' and just misses the mark.

I take him by the hand. "Come on. Let's step outside and get you some cool air." Christian and I walk through the kitchen and out past the patio into the yard. "Put that drink down." I take it out of his hand and give it to the bar tender to dispose of on our way. "Do you need to sit down?"

"No, I'm fine. " he stops and grabs my arm pulling me to him "I love you so much. I'd like to get between your legs and eat my way straight to your heart..."

"Well, I love you too Sweetheart. And that's a lovely thought. Let's keep walking."

"No seriously." He stops again. " You're beautiful in the moonlight. You know, looking at you right now, in this light... I could fuck you."

"I'm sure you could Christian, but you need to sober up a bit."

He grabs my upper arms and pulls me to him." First, I want to kiss you. I want to kiss those lips…"He presses his lips to my mouth and moves them across mine. Finally he breaks and whispers against my mouth. " …. then, I'll move up to your belly button." He starts to laugh. "Get it? Kiss your lips, then move up?"

"Oh, Sweetheart. You're a mess. What am I going to do with you?"

"I could think of a few things we could do. Wanna' go to the boathouse?" he asks.

"No. I don't think we need to go to the boat house right now. Look I'm going to sit you down in one of the patio chairs and then go get you a plate of food." I take his hand and pull him over to a side patio away from the bar, and settle him in a chair. "Now you wait right there. I'll be back in a minute."

I quickly disappear into the house and collect a plate of food to take to him. When I return, he's gone. "Christian?" I look around. "Christian where are you?" "Christian answer me." I try not to sound too hysterical.

"I'm right here."

"Where?"

"Here." I finally see his outline between the shrubs and the side of the house.

"What are you doing in there?" I set his plate down and try to extricate him from the landscaping.

"I was trying to find the bathroom and got lost."

"Come on sweetheart. Come sit down and have something to eat." I finally get him in a chair and try to feed him some food.

"Mmmm. That's good." He says with his mouth full.

"I knew you must be hungry. Swallow and take another bite."

"Where's my drink?" he looks around.

"You've had enough to drink. Just try to keep eating."

"I'm making a mess. There are crumbs." He brushes the crumbs off of his lap and jacket. "I wouldn't kick you out of bed for eating crackers."

"That's nice to know, but I don't usually eat crackers in bed."

"You know the only reason I'd kick you out of bed?" he asks.

"No. I don't."

"The only reason I'd kick you out of bed is so I could fuck you on the floor." He grins and starts to chuckle.

"Okay. You're a real comedian tonight, aren't you?" I have to laugh.

"Hey. Party's breaking up. We wondered what happened to you two." I look up to see Elliott and Kate hand in hand walking out to the patio.

"I'm trying to get Christian to eat something. I'm afraid we didn't have time for dinner."

"Hi Lelliott." Christian grins up at his brother. "Hi Lelliott's wife."

"Christian, you're shitfaced. Mom's gonna' cloud up and rain all over you if she finds out." Elliott admonishes his brother.

"Ssshhh. Don't tell her."

"I won't. But you'd better sober up before she finds you." Elliott warns.

"Ana, do you need any help?" Kate asks.

"No I think we'll be fine. I'll let him sit here a while and then get Taylor to come help me. But thanks."

"Hey Lelliott. Remember that time?" Christian starts to laugh. "That time …I went in your room to….. to borrow toothpaste and you….you had that …..girl up in your room?"

"Shut up Christian," Elliott warns.

"No. It was great. He ….he had her all covered up….. in the bed like she was some big…pil…. pillow or something. Like I wouldn't….be …able to see her." He continues to laugh. "That was great…..Mom never found out. He …he acted like nothing was…was goin' on. I knew she was under the blanket. I could see her head…..her head movin'. " He just cracks up. "Oh…oh, god that was funny."

"Christian, I mean it. You're gonna' get clocked if you don't shut the fuck up." Elliott sound serious. "I can remember a few hysterical instances about you. Unless you want me to recount them right now, you'll put a fucking sock in it."

"O..Okay." Christian tries to stop laughing. "What ever happened to her? Shit, Ana …..yo..you should've seen it. Her head ….was…was just bobbin' up and down. Elliott was tryin' to…to.. act like…nothin' was happening."

"I warned you." Christian looks up just in time to see Elliott turn the hose on him.

"Fuck! Elliott! You son of a bitch!" Christian yells. I jump out of the way to prevent damage to my new dress as Kate and I scream in unison.

"What's going on out here?" Carrick bursts out of the house to see his sons playing with the water hose while dressed in formal attire.

"Christian's had a bit much to drink and I'm sobering him up, Dad." Elliott says fiercely as he wrestles Christian for ownership of the hose.

Kate and I can only stare at each other in silence as I try to shake the water from my dress.

"Give me that fucking thing! You asshole." Christian yells as he fights his brother for rights to the hose.

"Thank God all the guests are gone. I just don't want to be here when Grace sees this." Carrick says as he shakes his head. "You two stop it! I mean it," he yells at his boys.

"Christian! Get your fucking hands off or I'll…" Elliott growls.

"You'll fucking what , dick wad?" Christian growls back.

"What's going on? Why is everybody out here? Oh my God. What are they doing?" Mia screeches as she walks out on the patio to see what all the ruckus is about. She walks over to stand with Kate and me to watch the altercation. "I just don't believe those two. What happened?"

By this time both brothers are totally sopping wet. Elliott throws the hose to the ground. "There. I warned you to keep your fucking mouth shut." Elliott tries to look angry until he breaks out in laughter and grabs Christian to keep him from falling over. "That _was_ pretty fucking funny." He laughs with Christian. "Man that girl could suck the….."

"Elliott! I think we've heard enough," Kate growls.

"What's everyone doing out here?" Grace asks innocently as she walks out the back door. "Elliott. Christian. What in the world?" she asks in horror as she spies her drenched children.

"Now, Grace. They boys were just having a little fun and got carried away. It's alright." Carrick tries to assuage her .

" I know Christian has had too much to drink. He almost attacked Ana in the hall."

"Well. Everything is under control, Sweetheart." Carrick reassures her. "Come, let's go back in the house. They'll work it out."

Grace huffs and wags her finger at both drenched men. "I'd ground both of you if I could. Honestly. Dry off and get in the house." She snaps at them then turns to walk back inside. "Carrick? Are you coming, Dear?"

"Right behind you." He stops for a moment. "Oh, Elliott?"

"Yeah Dad?" Elliott looks at his father.

"Your Mom?….. She knew." With that he joins Grace inside.

Still with their arms around each other, Christian and Elliott get serious for a moment. "Well, shit, Elliott."

"Yeah, Christian. Shit's right."


	58. Chapter 58

_**Fifty Shades…Full Circle**_

_**Chapter 58**_

"Christian what is going on? You never drink too much as a social event." I ask as I take the pins out of my hair and take my earrings out. Christian has sobered up a bit with food, time and cold water.

"Fuck. I don't know," he growls as he strips his tie off and unbuttons his almost dry shirt.

"You are always the picture of propriety." I remind him.

"I know. I guess I should have eaten something before we left. All I had today was IHOP and that was hours ago." He peels his shirt off and throws it in the closet. "I need a shower, but it's too fucking late. I'll get one in the morning."

After depositing my hair pins in the bathroom, I walk out to see how he is doing. "Wait. Don't touch that." He barks.

"What?" I stare at him startled . "What's wrong?"

He walks over and puts his hands on my shoulders then lets them glide up and down my arms. "I think I made you a promise earlier this evening." With that he takes the raw edge of the organza bow at my neck in his teeth and tugs on it. After the bow falls apart he brushes my hair aside and softly begins to kiss behind my ear before he takes the fabric at my neck and pulls it away from my skin with his mouth. "Christian?"

"Yes?"

"What are you doing?"

"I promised to undress you with my teeth and being a man of my word….that's what I'm doing."

"Sweetheart. That's lovely, but I know you aren't feeling up to it." I tilt my head back as his lips make soft trails up my neck.

"Have I ever not been 'up to it'?" he asks between kisses.

"I can think of a time or two and they both involved alcohol consumption…..on your part. But don't rush to stop."

"The only thing I'm drunk on is you. And I'm, in desperate need of another drink."

Still enjoying the attention being paid to my neck, "You get sappy when you drink."

"Mmm. But you love me."

"Mmm. Yes I do." Christian's hands find their way up and under my skirt to squeeze my cheeks.

"You've got the best ass I've ever seen. How does it stay like that after two kids?"

"Mmm." I can't help but smile. "It's chasing after those two kids that does the trick. And I'm glad you approve." I tilt my head up and twisting my hands in his hair I pull his face to mine. Christian quickly seals his mouth to mine and begins to kiss me like it's the last thing he'll ever do. While our mouths move over each other, he pulls my hips forward and presses me into the evidence of his ardor.

"Christian?" I whisper.

"That's what I want to hear." He breathes against my mouth.

"Mmmm. What?" I breathe back against him between kisses.

"My name. I want to hear you say it." He exhales against my ear as he pants for breath. He is getting so needy as his hands move over me feverishly exploring my body. "I want to hear you say it every time I make you come tonight."

Christian deftly removes the leather belt around my waist and yanks the dress down letting it fall to the floor. I'm left in nothing but the sheer black blouse and black lace panties, accessorized by black thigh highs and the shoes. "You didn't wear a bra." He moans as his hand squeezes and massages my breasts.

"No. Dress….wasn't ..made to …wear one." I'm finding it more difficult to form words.

Christian picks me up and tosses me backwards on to the bed, letting me bounce a time or two. While I bounce, he swiftly unzips and divests himself of his trousers and boxers. As I look up at him he grabs my ankles and pulls me to the edge of the bed. He folds himself over me and begins to work his way up my tummy kissing and nibbling my skin. I can't help but giggle, "Christian! That tickles." Without warning he grabs the waistband of my panties in his teeth and begins to yank them down. Carefully working them from side to side he manages to get them to my knees, before he grabs them in his hand and forces them down and off my legs.

Christian and I are both gasping and panting as he crawls up to once again seal his mouth over mine and devour me. My arms wrap around his back and I bring him closer as I pull my knees up and position myself allowing him move inside. Oh, my god this is glorious. His feet are still on the floor as he props on his forearms and cups my head between his hands then rubs his nose against mine. "I love you I love you I love you." He whispers repeatedly against my mouth as he slides his lips over mine. All the while he is moving in and out at an achingly slow pace.

"I love you." I whisper against him.

"God you feel so good." He whispers back. "How does it feel?"

"Good. You feel good." I gasp back.

"You like that?" he breathes.

"Uh Huh." I pant. "God I need you."

His mouth finds mine again and we devour each other as he moves in and out. "Fuck, I love this," he pants against my lips.

"I know." I gasp. "Me too."

"Look at me. I need to see you." He whispers as he brushes my hair off of my face. "Your so damn beautiful, Ana Grey. I need you so fucking much." We continue to gasp against each other, our mouths millimeters apart. "I can feel you, baby, you're almost there."

"Yes." I pant as I begin to tense. "Fuck, yes." I look up and gaze into his eyes. "Christian," I gasp just as I begin to fall, "I love you." I can see him smile as I tremble against him.

"That's it." he gasps. "God you're so amazing." As my body is riding the last of its release, Christian buries his head in my neck and grumbles, "Fuck. Baby." His body quivers against mine and I feel him jerk inside me as he succumbs. As he finishes he wraps me in his arms with his head still buried in my neck. I keep my thighs tight around him, almost digging my heels into his glorious ass, to keep him from leaving me.

"Ohhh, FUCK that was good." He growls. "God what did I ever do to deserve this?" he breathes against my neck as we try to catch our breath. He props on his forearms again and looks down at me giving me a smile and a soft kiss on my nose. "Mrs. Grey. You are absolutely the single best thing that ever happened to me, without exception. Now let me go, I'm thirsty."

I release my hold and lie on my back waiting for him to return from the bathroom. He grabs two bottles of water from the mini fridge and walks back over to the bed. I'm still on my back, lying just like Christian left me, my knees open and bent, dressed in a sheer blouse, black thigh highs and the shoes. "You are one fucking sexy woman Ana Grey." He grins as he opens a bottle and hands it to me. He opens his and takes a long sip never moving his eyes from me. He is gorgeous. Every muscle is accentuated by the perspiration glistening on his body and he is already back at half-staff and growing.

"Are you ready ?" he asks.

"For what?" I ask confused.

"I'm ready to hear my name again." He gives me a huge smile and sets his water on the nightstand.

As he hovers over me I remind him, "You did say something earlier about eating your way to my heart."

"Yes. I believe I do remember saying that….and being a man of my word…"

* * *

"How do you fee, baby?" I ask Christian as I sit on the edge of the bed and comb my fingers through his hair.

"I hurt," he mumbles.

"I'm sorry. I brought you some Advil and a glass of juice. Do you feel like sitting up and taking it?"

Christian is on his stomach with his head buried in his pillow and his eyes closed. "Uh Uh. If you'll leave me alone I can go ahead and die."

"Oh, I'm sorry, Sweetheart." I lean over and give him a soft kiss on his back, then rub my hands over his shoulders.

"What fucking time is it?" he a grumbles.

"Almost noon. Are you hungry?"

"God no. Don't even mention food," he growls at me.

"Teddy's been asking for you. I told him you weren't feeling good this morning."

"Just tell him I died sometime during the night. He'll understand when he gets older."

I have to smile, "Do you want me to let you sleep?"

He grumbles and turns over on his back. "No. I need to get up and call Stephen and Flynn about tomorrow." He rubs his hands over his face and yawns. "You look good this morning."

"I stopped before I had too much to drink last night."

"It was that fucking 25 year old scotch of Dad's. I should have known better."

"It wasn't the age of the scotch, it was the number of glasses." I remind him. "You shouldn't have had so much to drink on an empty stomach."

"Fuck I hate it when you're right." He looks perplexed and has his arm over his eyes. "Did Elliott spray me with a garden hose?"

I nod, "Yes, I'm afraid he did, Sweetheart."

"At Mom and Dad's?"

"Yes."

"Why? I can't remember wha…"

"You were divulging secrets of your youth that involved him and some girl in his room."

He chuckles and rubs his other hand across his chest. "God that's right. I remembered the time he had that fucking girl up in his room after school and I walked in on her giving him a blow job. I scared the shit out of him. I guess he thought it was Mom or Mia coming in. Anyway he tried to stash her under the covers, but she just continues to fucking bob up and down. Elliott was trying to talk and all he could do was mumble and roll his eyes back in his head. What a fucking dip shit."

"Didn't you ever do anything like that?" I ask.

"Shit no. I was smarter than that. Besides, I never really had a girlfriend in high school. You were my first girlfriend, remember?"

"So she was his girlfriend?"

"She was for the length of time it took for her to blow him. I never saw her after that. Elliott never really went with anyone, he was more of the hit and run type."

"How did he get away with having a girl in his room?"

"Mom and Dad were still at work and the housekeeper was busy cooking dinner. We were supposed to be getting our homework done," he yawns and his hand moves down to fidget with his testicles. I guess men like to take inventory every morning just to make sure they didn't somehow escape during the night.

"You're Dad said that you Mother knew about it."

"He did?" Huh. Wonder how? She didn't get home until dinner time and the girl was long gone before that."

"Teddy would never try to do anything like that, would he?" I ask almost not wanting to hear the answer.

He shrugs, "I have no idea. I would hope not. I'd rather he do it in a car like everyone else."

I smack his arm. "Ouch. Shit. I was just teasing." He pulls me to his chest. " I'll wear him out if he ever tries anything like that."

"What about Grace?"

"Well after I finish choking the life out of the little cocksucker, and handing him his dick, I'll have her shipped off to a convent for the rest of her life."

"Well, get ready."

"What?" he looks up.

"You're little girl has her first crush."

"Huh? She's three. How can she have a crush? Does she even know what a boy is?"

"I believe she does." I give him a smirk. "It's some young boy singer. Haven't you heard her singing that song?"

"What song?"

"Baby I wuv yoooou. Yesth, baby I wuv yooou." I mimic Grace.

"Awww. Fuck." He wrinkles his face as if her were in pain. "How did that happen?"

"He's all over TV and the radio. All the little girls are in love with him."

"I'll break his fucking neck. Or better yet, I'll buy his contract and ruin him."

"You will not." I have to laugh. "Can you really do that?"

"Damn straight I can."

"But you wouldn't? I mean, this is just a normal part of growing up for a little girl. Let her enjoy it."

"You're right. I guess she can't get in too much trouble as long as he stays on the television."

"You're still the main man in her life, Mr. Grey. That girl does love her daddy."

He grins, "Yes she does, doesn't she? …..She's my baby girl. Always will be, no matter how big she gets." I can see him staring off into space." Remember when we brought her home?"

"Yes. I do believe I remember that."

"She was so fucking little; smaller than Teddy was," he grins.

"That's because she came early. She was her usual impatient self."

"Yeah," he snorts. "And she was so pink and smelled so good. You had her wrapped in that pink receiving blanket and she looked like this little pink present. Remember when I brought Teddy to visit you in the hospital? He ran over and jumped up on the bed with you and tried to crawl in your lap."

"Yes. I wanted to hold him so bad, but my stomach was still sore from that section."

"He must have been there for about ten minutes before he even noticed that Grace was in the room." Christian chuckles. "He looked over at the bassinet and said, 'Someone left a baby in here'."

I giggle a bit. "Yes. Then he looked at me and said, 'Send it home, Mama.' That's when you picked her up and brought her over to the bed and explained that it was Grace and she was his baby sister and she would be coming to live with us."

Christian smirks at me, "He still wasn't any too happy about it. He told me to give her back."

He stretches and yawns exposing the tent over his groin. " Well, I guess I'd better get up and shower before the day's gone."

"Okay. Don't forget your Advil and juice. You want me to fix you some soup just to get something on your tummy?"

"Yeah. That sounds good. I'll be down in about fifteen minutes."

* * *

"Thank you, Sweetheart." I take his hand in mine and lace my fingers with his.

"You don't need to thank me." He leans over and cups my head bringing my forehead to his lips. "I love you. I'm not going to let you go alone."

"I hope Lorna follows through and shows up." I tell him as I stare out the window at the clouds below us.

"If she's smart she'll show." Christian mutters as he checks his phone and types an email. "Isla?" Christian speaks into the intercom.

"Yes, Mr. Grey?" she answers.

"Bring me the remote." He looks at me "You want anything?"

"I could use some water."

"Okay…. And bring Mrs. Grey a sparkling water and I'll have a coffee."

"Yes, Sir. Right away."

In a flash Isla is there with the remote to the television and a water for me which she opens and pours into a glass. "I'll have your coffee in a moment, Mr. Grey. I'm making it fresh for you."

"Thanks." Christian points the remote at the huge flat screen and turns the news on. Gwen Green his new head of Public Relations is on reading the press release about GEH purchasing Vanderberg Holdings.

"Here you go, Mr. Grey." Isla whispers as she sets his coffee in front of him. Christian takes a sip as he watches Gwen deliver the general announcement of the acquisition.

"Christian, I know you wanted to be there. I'm sorry."

"Ummm." He swallows his coffee. "Not really. Gwen can handle any questions they throw at her." He tells me as he watches the screen intently. Christian and I watch as Gwen deftly fields questions giving out just enough information, but not too much. It's over in about ten minutes.

"Gwen's pretty. How is she doing?"

"I hadn't noticed what she looks like but she seems competent. I was used to Olivia."

"How is she?"

"Fine I guess. I haven't heard anything since she quit. She stops by to see Andrea occasionally to show off the baby."

"I know you miss her. She worked for you for years."

He shrugs. "I offered to put in a day care, but she still wanted to quit. Her decision."

"I'm sure she wanted to stay home with the baby, just like I did with ours. But you know, putting in a day care might be a good idea. A lot of offices are doing it now."

"Yeah, I actually had thought about it. Maybe it's not such a bad idea."

Taylor and Reynolds are seated in the rear discussing the security operations for the day trip to Sacramento.

"I can't wait for you to meet Tommy. I..I know…. I'm not trying to talk you into anything. He's just so sweet."

"Ana. Look, I know how much this means to you, and if it ever comes down to it, which I don't think it will since the girl is going to rehab. But, should circumstances change, I'll keep an open mind….at least I'll try. That's all I can promise. I'm dead set against taking him in, though. I just don't see an upside to it….for any of us."

"I talked to your Mom about it…."

"Mom? Why?"

"I just wanted to get her perspective since she and your dad adopted three different children from three different situations. It worked for them."

"I guess it did. Elliott, Mia and I are pretty tight."

"She said that siblings usually do well with the situation. They adapt to the each other's needs. She said the marriages don't always survive a special needs child, though. But Christian if we had another child …" he looks at me. "I mean not us, but couples who have a biological child can have one with special needs. You never know. There are no guarantees no matter where your child comes from."

"I know that, but…"

"And we have no idea that Tommy even has problems. He could be just fine."

"Ana. You're getting worked up over a situation that hasn't happened yet. Let's just pick up this girl and her kid and get them to the facility. That's why we are going. The purpose to this whole thing is to help her so she can take care of her own child."

I nod and put my other hand on our clasped hands. "You're right. I know that. I get carried away sometimes."

"I like that you care so much. It's just one of the infinite reasons I fell in love with you."

"Oh. My ears are popping. I think we must be getting near Sacramento."

"Yeah, we're beginning to bank. Buckle your seatbelt. We should be landing soon."

Christian and I enter Children's Hospital after a quick drive from the airfield. He would have to look like sex on wheels today. Khaki slacks and a white shirt, top button unbuttoned and sleeves rolled up and his brown leather slip-ons and belt. He needs a haircut, but in fact I like it a bit longer; it sort of falls across his forehead in the breeze. We are followed by Taylor and Reynolds close on our heels.

As we take the elevator to the fifth floor, Christian takes my hand and gives me a reassuring smile and a wink. I lead the way to Tommy's room and Jenny is getting some medication down Tommy.

"Hi Jenny."

"Oh, hi Mrs. Grey. I'm just getting Tommy's last dose down him before he leaves."

"How is he?"

"He's a lot better than the last time you saw him, but he's still going to need some care to get back to his old self. Huh Tommy?" she smiles as he takes the last bit of medication laced applesauce.

Tommy is sitting up in his bed his curly blond hair in a mess. "Hi Tommy. How are you feeling, sweetheart?" He looks up at me, but I'm not sure he recognizes me.

"Where Mama?" he asks as he looks at the door.

"Oh, Jenny, this is my husband Mr. Grey." Jenny, stands up to shake his hand and I can see her stifle a gasp as she extends her hand to shake his. Her eyes fix on Christian and her mouth gapes just a bit as she stammers out a 'hello'.

"The social worker is due at nine, Mrs. Grey. I understand that Tommy's mother has agreed to go to rehab and that she and Tommy will be going back to Seattle with you."

"I certainly hope so. She agreed to go Saturday. I just hope she shows up this morning."

"Well, maybe she will. I'll let you and Mr. Grey spend some time with Tommy." She quickly cleans up the medication and applesauce mess and exits the room.

I softly walk over and sit on the edge of the bed. "Hi Tommy. I'll bet you don't remember me."

He nods his head. "Ice cweam."

"That's right. I got you some ice cream. How are you feeling?" He rubs his eyes with the backs of his hands and coughs. "Are you tired sweetie?" He nods and crawls over in my lap, surprising me by doing so. I pull him in my arms and cuddle him. I doubt he gets much cuddling other than when he's in the hospital. I look up at Christian who is leaning against the wall and give him a little smile. He tries to smile back while chewing his lip.

"Mrs. Grey?" I turn to see the social worker for Tommy's case.

"Oh, Mrs. Nettle. Hello." I nod to Christian. "This is my husband Christian." Christian extends his hand to her and she smiles at him maybe just a little too long.

"Well, I understand that Lorna has agreed to go to rehab and that you and Mr. Grey are going to take them back to Seattle and get her admitted. Is that correct?" She asks.

"Yes. As of right now that's the plan. It's ten after nine and I haven't seen her yet."

"Mrs. Grey…if Lorna doesn't follow through, I'll have to take him and place him in foster care. You understand."  
I nod as tears well in my eyes, "Yes. I understand. She said she'd be here. I know she will."

"Mrs. Nettle?" Christian approaches her.

"Yes, Mr. Grey and call me Connie, please."

"Do you have a foster home for him?"

"As of now I do. I have a couple that has two fosters right now. They will be willing to take him while we find a more permanent placement for him."

"I see. Okay."

"Sorry! I missed the bus and had to wait for the next one." Lorna announces as she walks in the room. It's a good sign she's carrying a large bag that I am hoping contains her belongings.

"Lorna. Sweetheart. I'm so glad to see you."

" I'm here. I brought our stuff." Lorna looks fairly clean. At least her hair is washed. She's in her worn ratty jeans with a T-shirt, hoodie sweatshirt and sneakers.

"Well, let's all go down to the conference room and talk." Connie suggests.

I gently place Tommy back on the bed and cover him up, trying not to wake him. Then Christian takes my hand and we walk to the small meeting room.

"When we enter the room Jenny and Tommy's doctor, Dr. Reese are there waiting on us.

After introductions are made Dr. Reese Introduces himself to Christian. "Mr. Grey. Pleased to meet you. I saw the CNN piece this morning. Congratulations."

"Thank you." Christian nods to him.

"If there's anything we can do for you hear a Children's, please let us know." Translated, can we have some money?

"I think we just want to find out exactly what the situation is and get the boy released so we can head back to Seattle."

"Of course. I understand that Tommy will be moving to Seattle so that his mother can complete a drug rehabilitation program. Is that correct?"

"Yes. That's the plan Dr. Reese." Connie affirms.

"Very well. I will need the name of the physician who will be attending him so that I can report on his history, status and course of treatment while he was here."

"My mother is a Pediatrician in Seattle. She has agreed to take Tommy as a patient. Her name is Grace Trevelyan-Grey. Her practice is in a suburb of Seattle, Bellevue Pediatric Associates. I'll make sure you have the contact information. She has requested that we bring a copy of the child's records for review so that she can bring herself up to speed. We'll be glad to deliver them to her."

"Fine. I'm comfortable with that. I heard Dr. Trevelyan-Grey speak at the national conference two years ago. Your mother is very well respected Mr. Grey."

"Yes. She is."

"Well, Mr. Grey, I'll need to get the information of the program and facility that Lorna will be going to. I'll need that information to give to the case worker there in Seattle. I'll be transferring Tommy's records up there since she will be changing her residence to the state of Washington. They will have jurisdiction."

"Can I call you with that? I have a friend who is a psychiatrist taking care of those arrangements. I'm not sure of the particulars."

"I. I'm afraid I'll need to document all of that before I can release Tommy."

"Fine. I'll call and get it for you before we leave."

"Lorna? What are your thoughts on all of this?" Connie asks her.

Lorna shrugs. "I'll do whatever. I just don't want Tommy goin' to no foster home. If I have to go to some rehab to do that, then I'll do it."

"Mr. Grey? What are the provisions for Lorna and Tommy after she has completed rehab?"

"My wife and I will ensure that she attends counseling sessions for transition after she completes the program. We are prepared to subsidize housing and living expenses for them both as well as education for Ms. Blakely, should she desire to go back to school."

"Okay. I think that will satisfy the state of California. Mr. Grey if you can get me that information, I'll sign off on this case and release Tommy to the state of Washington. And Mr. and Mrs. Grey, if you will leave me contact information for each of you. I will need to follow up in a month."

"Of course. Thank you." I tell her.

"Well, if you will excuse me, I have rounds to finish. I'll have the clerk make copies of these records for you Mr. Grey." Dr. Reese extends his hand to Christian as he stands up. "Mrs. Grey, it's a pleasure."

"I'll make sure to give you his prescriptions and two days of medications to take with you," Jenny advised us.

"I'm gonna' go get Tommy dressed. I brought him some clothes." Lorna tells us as she walks to Tommy's room.

Christian puts his arm around my shoulder as we walk back down to Tommy's room. "Are you feeling better about this?" he asks me.

"Yes. I'm just so glad you were here. You've made all the arrangements for this. I don't know what I would have done without your help."

"It's okay. I'm glad to do it. As long as it makes you happy. I like making you smile, Mrs. Grey."


	59. Chapter 59

_**Fifty Shades…Full Circle**_

_**Chapter 59**_

After reaching Tommy's room, Christian excuses himself to call John and get the particulars on the treatment program to give to Connie, while I help Lorna, get Tommy dressed and get his things packed. I want to cry every time I see the blue marks over his little body.

"Mama, I misth you," Tommy says as he puts his palms against Lorna's cheeks. He is standing on the bed as Lorna helps him into his little worn jeans and a T-shirt.

Lorna gives him a smile and a hug. "I missed you too, baby."

"Mama, no go way agin, peese?" he asks her. The worried look on his face makes him look so much older than his three years.

"No, sweetie, I'll try not to go away again." Lorna sighs , but loses her smile.

"Can I help?" I ask her.

"Yeah. Can you put his stuff in the bag over there?" Lorna nods toward the green canvas duffle that she threw on the floor.

Tommy gives out a croupy sounding cough. "We go home now?" he asks Lorna as she continues to dress him.

"We are going on a trip, sweetie. Would you like that?" she asks hm.

He shakes his head, "No. Wan go home."

"Tommy would you like to go on an airplane and go way up high like a bird?" I ask as I pack their things.

"No." he shakes his head again. "Go home wif mama."

"Well, we have to take a trip Tommy. We are going to a place named Seattle." Lorna explains.

Tommy looks worried but agrees.

"I've given all the information to Connie and the clerk gave me this packet. It's got his records and prescriptions," Christian tells me as he walks back in the room.

Jenny comes in and walks over and gives Tommy a hug. "You take care Tommy. I'm gonna' miss you, sweetie. You come back to see me one day, okay?" I can see the tears welling in her eyes as she says good bye to her little patient.

"No bye, bye, Jen Jen." Tommy hangs on to her tightly and Jenny has to peel his arms from around her neck.

"You be a good boy, now." She looks at Lorna as she turns to leave and her face turns serious. "You take care of him. Do you hear me?"

Lorna seems uncomfortable and looks at her feet, "Sure, yeah. He'll be fine."

"Jenny. Call me anytime. Even just to check on him. Please." I try to tell her. She smiles and gives me a nod before leaving the room.

"Are we about ready?" Christian asks.

"I think so. Lorna, do you have everything?" I ask.

"Yeah. I think I got everything." Taylor picks up her green bag and Lorna stands Tommy on the floor as we walk out the door into the hall. Tommy waves good bye to everyone as we walk down the hall to the elevators. It's as if this was more his home and these people his family than Lorna.

"Lorna, do you want me to carry him? I doubt he can walk all the way down to the car." I ask.

"I'll get him," Lorna bends down and picks him up.

We make our way to the car waiting for us out front and Taylor tosses the green duffle in the back then slides in next to Reynolds who is driving. Lorna gets Tommy into a car seat for the trip. Taylor had the car rental place put one in the car for us. Taylor doesn't miss a trick. Tommy is so worn out and he falls asleep on the way to the airfield.

"So what's this place like?" Lorna asks. She can't seem to take her eyes off of my husband, but then most women can't seem to either.

"It's called Lakeside. They have inpatient and outpatient programs and they have a place for children of the patients. That way Tommy can stay with you. Well, not with you. It's sort of like a daycare, but it's twenty four hours. You can visit with him and see him, but the caregivers will take care of him, so you can concentrate on the program without having to worry about him." Christian explains.

"How long do I have to stay?" Lorna asks him.

"Until you 've got the fucking drugs out of your system and are able to stay away from them." He says in an irritated voice.

"Then what?" she asks.

"Then we'll get you and Tommy set up in an apartment and find you a job. Or you can go back to school if you want to. As long as you stay clean and take care of him. You back slide and you're on your own." He almost snaps at her as he stares out the window and rubs his finger against his lips.

I can tell he is irritated so I reach over and take his hand and give him a smile. That evokes a bit of a return smile from him.

"Lorna, we'll be here to support you. We want to see you get well and be able to take care of Tommy and yourself. Don't worry about what will happen down the road. Just think about today and not tomorrow. Tomorrow will take care of itself." I tell her. "I don't want you to worry about anything, just concentrate on the program and getting better. Don't worry about anything outside those walls and call us anytime you need to or if you get lonely, or just need someone to talk to. We'll be here for you okay?"

"Yeah." I can hear her begin to sniffle and look over to see her trying to hold back tears. I slide over and put my arms around her and she leans into me.

"What's wrong sweetie?" I ask as I rub her back.

"Nobody ever wanted to take care of me before. Nobody ever cared if I lived or died." This time she really breaks down and begins to cry.

"Shh. Shh. It's okay. You've got somebody who cares now." I can tell she's not any more mature than Tommy. I've got two children on my hands, not one.

I sense all this emotion is eating at Christian. His jaw is tensing and he is fidgeting. I take his hand and squeeze it giving him a smile. I whisper "I love you. Are you okay?"

He nods. "Yep. I just need to get back. I've got a lot going on right now."

"I know."

We reach the airfield and all board the plane for the trip back to Seattle. Lorna is taken aback by the opulence of a private plane, especially after take- off, when I take her to the back and we put a sleeping Tommy to bed in the bedroom. After a few minutes, she asks to go forward and use the bathroom. I point out that there is one right here in the bedroom, but she says she needs to get something from her bag. She heads to the front and I stay with Tommy in case he wakes up.

After a few minutes I begin to wonder where she is, so I get up and open the door to the cabin. I notice she is sitting in a seat near Christian talking to him. He sounds angry, so I decide to just hang back for a moment to see what's going on.

"So you must be really rich, huh?" she asks him.

Christian peers up from his laptop, "And?"

"Nothing. You just got this plane and all. That takes a lot of money."

"I repeat, and?"

"I was just tryin' to be nice." She says to him.

"I'm busy. I'm sure your child needs you." He returns to his laptop.

"Your wife is with him, besides he's asleep. You know I can keep you company if you need it."

"I don't need company."

"But , you might like it," she says coyly and twirls her hair in her fingers. About that time she reaches over and trails her finger down his arm. He grabs her wrist and jerks it away from him.

"Look. I'm sure you have used this tactic to get what you want many times, but not with me. That woman sitting back there with your child is my wife and she cares about you and your son for some reason and she has gone way out on a limb to try to help both of you. This is how you fucking repay her? By hitting on her husband? Christian shoves her shirt sleeve up to expose her forearm. I don't know what you shoved up your fucking veins while you were in the bathroom, but the fact that you are high as a kite is the only reason I don't throw you out that door over there right now.

"I want you to get rid of whatever it is you have in your bag, just don't do it on my plane. Now I want you to get your ass back there and sit down. If you ever fucking do anything to hurt my wife, I'll make your life miserable. Do we understand one another?" he asks her.

"Yyyes. I'm sorry. I didn't mean…"

"I don't give a fuck what you meant. I want you to get your ass in a seat, away from me, and leave me alone or I will throw you out that door and not think twice about it."

"O..okay. I'm sorry. I'm going." Lorna gets up and heads back as I quickly close the door and wait for her to return to the bedroom.

As she comes in I can see she's upset. "Is everything okay?"

"Yeah. I'm fine."

"You look a little upset."

"No. I'm okay. I get a little nervous on airplanes, that's all." She assures me.

"Okay. It's a short trip to Seattle. We should be landing shortly."

After landing back in Seattle we disembark and get into the waiting SUV. Taylor drives with Reynolds up front with him and the rest of us nervously in the back. I can see Lorna is getting antsy.

"Will John be there?" I ask Christian.

"Yes. I gave him a call as soon as we landed and he'll meet us there to facilitate everything."

I give him a smile and a nod, "Good."

We finally pull onto the grounds of the facility and get out walking inside. Lorna is carrying Tommy who is cranky. Who could blame him? He's sick, he was woken from a nap and now he is being dragged someplace and he has no idea of where he is. When we arrive inside John is there to meet us. The receptionist calls the intake coordinator who walks out and introduces himself as Jerry Darcy.

By this time Lorna is almost beside herself. I can tell she wants to hit the door and keep going. I take Tommy after Jerry requests to see Lorna alone. He feels so bad and is crying, so I try to rock him and finally am able to get him to sleep.

"How is he?" Christian asks sitting next to me.

"About what you'd expect for a sick three year old." I try to give him a smile. "How are you?"

"I just want to get this the fuck over with get back to our own kids."

"So this is Lorna's child?" John asks as he sits across from us.

"Who the fuck else would it be, John?" Christian glares at him.

"You seem a bit tense, Christian."

"Do I now?" Christian snaps.

"Do you want to talk about it?" John asks.

"No. I do not want to talk about it. I just want to get these two admitted and get this over with. It's been a long fucking day."

After about thirty minutes Jerry reappears without Lorna. "Has she been using recently?"

"Yes." Christian offers. "I think she did something on the plane on the trip down. You probably need to check her bag. I think she has stuff in there."

"Don't worry. All of her belongings will be searched prior to admission. Problem is she needs detox before we can take her."

"You can't take her?" I ask.

"We can, it's just she needs a couple of days of detox before she can enter the program. Look it's not unusual. We'll admit her to the hospital for a couple of days then, when she's clean, she'll be brought over here for admission. Okay. Look, this is a voluntary program. She can leave anytime. I suggest we move forward while she's in a frame of mind to do this."

"Okay. Let's get her admitted then." Christian offers. "I'll cover all the costs."

"Good. I just wanted to check with you and apprise you of the situation."

"Oh, Jerry?" Christian asks." What about Tommy here? Where do we take him?"

"Well, we can't take him until she's admitted here."

"What?" Christian snaps. "I thought you had a childcare program? What do you mean you can't take him?"

"Mr. Grey, we can't accept the child until the mother becomes a resident of the program and she can't do that until she detoxes." Jerry calmly tells Christian. "I'm sorry if there was a misunderstanding."

I look over at Christian, "We can keep him for a couple of days. Just until Lorna gets clean and can get admitted." I whisper over to him.

"Ana, this is not how it was supposed to work. He is not supposed to come to our house." Christian is trying to control himself.

"I know, but we've come this far with them." I try to reason with Christian without waking a sleeping Tommy. " What do we do with them? If Lorna doesn't detox then she can't enroll in the program and then what do we do? They'll be out on the streets of Seattle. We promised to make sure she got treatment and that Tommy would be cared for."

Christian rubs the back of his neck as he paces "God damn, mother fuckin' shit…." I can hear him mutter under his breath. He finally stops and grits his teeth. "Okay. But just until she can get in the program."

"Thank you sweetheart." I walk over and put my arm around him.

"Don't thank me. He's coming back as soon as she's out of detox."

"I know." I whisper.

"Christian? Are you sure this is something you want to do?" John asks. "You're asking a lot of yourself."

"Fuck no I don't want to do it, John. What choice do I have?" Christian snaps.

"You could turn them both over to the state. The child could go into foster care and the girl…"

"No I can't John. I made a promise to get her treatment and make sure he was cared for."

"People break promises all the time. I'm sure the Department of Child Services has seen circumstances like this before."

"John, I couldn't give a fuck about the Department of Child Services. I made a promise to my wife. I don't break promises to my wife. Ever."

* * *

After getting Lorna admitted to the hospital which is a few yards from the facility, we drive back to the house with Tommy. I think John is aware how difficult this may be on Christian and advised him to call anytime he needed to. Of course that's nothing new. Christina always calls anytime he wants to….day or night. Poor John has been a saint for all the help he has given to the Grey family.

As we pull up to the front of the house, Christian gets out and helps me out of the car with Tommy who is thankfully still dozing. As we walk back into the house I can hear Teddy's little voice as he comes running to meet us.

"MOM! DAD! You're home…" he stops in his tracks and stares at us with the sleeping child. "Who's that?" he asks.

Before we can answer, Grace comes bounding in,"Doddy, Mama. You home."

"Shh. Let's be quiet. This is Tommy. I need to put him to bed and then, I'll come explain. Okay?" I tell them.

"Here." Christian reaches over and takes the sleeping little boy. "He's getting too heavy for you. I'll carry him up."

I gratefully relinquish the child to him. "Thank you, Sweetheart. I'm right behind you." I kiss Teddy and Grace, " I'll be right back and tell you all about it."

After we reach the top of the staircase Christian asks, "Where do you want him?"

"I guess the room across from ours." I offer as we walk down the hall.

"No. Not that one. That's Sam's." he tells me.

I'm really taken aback by that. I wasn't expecting that reaction from him. "Okay. How about the one next to Teddy?"

"Okay." Christian flips the light on as we walk in. He lays Tommy on the bed and I grab a blanket and cover him up.

"Do you think he'll be alright? Do you think he needs a crib?" I whisper to Christian.

"Ana, that kid's never seen the inside of a crib in his life. Except maybe when he was in the hospital. He'll be fine. I'll get one of the baby monitors so we can hear when he wakes up."

"That's a good idea Sweetheart. I'm sure he won't know where he is and will be frightened."

As I make sure he is covered up, Christian walks back in with a baby monitor and sets it on the nightstand next to the bed. "Ready?"

"Yes. I guess we need to try to explain this to the kids. But before we go back down," I put my arms around him and pull him close. " I just want you to know how very, very much I love you."

"I know." He kisses my head. "Let's go talk to the kids."

Christian and I take the kids into the family room and sit down with them. He sits Grace in his lap as I drag Teddy into mine. "I misth you doddy, I gwad you home." Grace smiles up at her dad.

Christian kisses her head and brushes her hair off of her face. He wraps her in his arms and gives her a huge squeeze and kisses her neck as she giggles. "Doddy, done do dat. It tikuls."

"Who was that?" Teddy asks.

"Well, Teddy. That was a little boy…"

"I know that, Mom. But who is he?" Teddy asks again.

"Do you both remember one day I told you that not every little boy and girl has food on the table and a warm place to sleep?" I ask them.

"Uh, huh." Teddy nods.

"Well, Tommy, the little boy upstairs is one of those little boys. He lives with his mom and she isn't always able to have food for him or a place for him to sleep."

"So why is he here?" Teddy asks.

"Because his mother is very sick and she can't take care of him right now. So he is going to stay with us for a few days until he can be with his mom again."

"But why is he asleep?"

"Because he has been sick too. He just got out of the hospital today and he still doesn't feel very good. Now, I want both of you to be especially nice to him while he is here. He misses his mom and he is a little scared right now, so we have to especially good to him. Do you both hear me?"

"Yes, ma'am. But why can't he stay with his Dad?" Teddy asks.

"Well, he doesn't have a Dad around to take care of him."

"But why not?"

"Sometimes, some daddies don't stay with their family. Tommy's daddy decided to live somewhere else and we don't know where he is."

"Would you ever leave us Dad?" Teddy looks terrified.

"No son. I'll never leave and live somewhere else. Don't ever worry about that." Christian leans over and kisses Teddy. "And I'll always take care of you and Grace. I'll make sure you never have to worry about anything."

"So can you help Daddy and me take care of Tommy while he is here?"

Teddy gives me a big nod and a smile. "How about you pretty girl?" I lean over and kiss Grace.

"Yesth, mama. We take care of 'em."

"Mrs. Grey what do you want to do about dinner?" Gail comes out and asks.

"Whatever you had planned is fine, Gail." I tell her.

"Okay. What about our…uh.. guest?" she asks.

"I guess maybe some soup? No. Chicken fingers, I know he likes chicken fingers and french-fries." I tell her.

"Okay. How about three chicken fingers and fries and two pastas con limon with grilled chicken?"

"Sounds great. Thanks Gail."

Christian and I spend some quality time with the kids. Once again Teddy and Grace have him on the floor and Jack is bouncing around yapping at them. I love watching them play. Christian is such a good father. No one ever loved his kids more than he does. Christian is giving Grace a horsey ride as Teddy tries to wrestle him to the ground. Over the squeals and horseplay, I hear a faint cry over the baby monitor and I get up to up check on out little house guest.

"Where you going, Babe?" Christian asks as he is pinned to the floor.

"I heard Tommy. I'm just going up to check on him." I walk upstairs and gently open to door to the guest room. Tommy is sitting up in the middle of the bed, looking totally confused with tears rolling down his cheeks. "Hey there little guy." I try to approach him gently so I don't scare him. As I sit down on the edge of the bed, he crawls over and gets into my lap just like he did at the hospital. "Hey sweetheart. Did you have a good nap?" He curls up and puts his thumb in his mouth and sniffles trying not to cry.

"Are you hungry? Do you want to eat some dinner?" I ask as I run my fingers through his curls. He nods his head against me. "Okay. Do you need to go potty?" I ask him. He nods again.

I stand up and walk to the bathroom to help him. When we get in there, I realize that he is wearing a diaper and he is soaking. Shit. I don't have any diapers. It never dawned on me that he wouldn't be potty trained at his age. I remember that I think we still have some of Grace's pull ups. They'll be pink, but they will have to do until we can get him some of his own. After I get him all cleaned up, trying not to cry when I see the marks on his little bottom, I get him dressed and carry him down to the family room to meet everyone.

He looks like a deer in a headlight as we walk through the house and he spies the kids with Christian. As I walk into the family room and sit down on the sofa the kids stop their playing. "Teddy, Grace. This is Tommy and he is going to stay with us for a few days. Can you both say 'hi' to him?"

Teddy and Grace gingerly walk over to see him. Tommy doesn't say a word and stares at them as he sucks his thumb and sniffles. "Mom. He has holes in his shirt." Teddy whispers to me. "

"I know, Sweetie, but we can get him a new shirt."

"Tommy, do you want to play with us?" Teddy asks tentatively. Tommy shakes his head as he buries his head against me.

"Why don't Tommy and I watch you play for a while. He's been sick and I don't think he feels very good yet."

"Okay." With that Teddy and Grace return to torturing their dad, until Gail calls for dinner.

All of us walk into the dining area and Teddy and Grace get into their respective chairs. I sit down with Tommy in my lap. Gail brings in the food and sets Tommy's chicken strips and a glass of milk down at my place along with my pasta con limon. "So is this our little house guest?" she asks.

"Yes. Gail this is Tommy. Tommy this is Gail." Gail gives his head a rub and smiles down at him. I think all of these new people are a bit overwhelming for him.

"Tommy , you'll like Gail. She takes care of us while Mom works." Teddy offers. Tommy still just looks around and sucks his thumb. I sit him up in my lap and show him his plate of chicken strips.

"Here you go." I hand him one and he takes a bite. "Is that good?" He nods as he chews and takes the chicken in his own hand to eat it. Jack walks over and starts to jump up and beg for food. I cannot break Christian from feeding him at the table. "Doggie." Tommy looks down at Jack. "Yes. That's Jack. He lives here." I tell him.

Jack jumps up and takes the chicken out of Tommy's hand and devours it. Tommy immediately begins to cry. "It's okay Sweetie. There is plenty more. Here." I show him his plate and hand him another piece of chicken and he stops crying to eat. He handily cleans his plate and finishes his milk. "You must have been hungry." I smile down at him. He nods as I wipe his mouth. "Do you want anything else?"

He nods. "Ice cweam?"

"Okay. I guess we can have some ice cream." I look over at Christian and he nods. "Sure. Let's have ice cream." He rubs his hands together and teases the kids.

"Gail?"

"Yes?" she comes running in. "Can I get you something?"

"I think we need some ice cream." Christian looks up at her.

"Okay. What flavor?"

"I want chocolate." Teddy smiles.

"I wan banilla." Grace adds.

"I'll have vanilla, too." Christian says. "Ana? What do you want?"

"I really don't need any. Tommy what flavor do you want?"

"Chokit."

"Okay. Tommy will have chocolate." Christian tells Gail. He looks back at me, "Sure? No ice cream, Babe?"

"No thanks. I really don't need any."

After dinner Gail helps the kids get started to get ready for bed while I take Tommy in to get him a bath. "Christian?" I yell for him.

"What Babe?" he asks as he round the corner of the bedroom.

"Can you sit with Tommy while I go find an old pair of Teddy's pajamas for him?"

"Sure." Christian sits down on the bed and talks to Tommy and tries to make friends with him. Tommy still seems to be a bit skittish of men. When I return I ask him to get Tommy's clothes off while I start the water for his bath. As I get the water tested to the right temperature and pour a few bubbles in, "ANA?"

"What is it sweetheart?" I run back into the bedroom to see Christian pale as a ghost. He has gotten Tommy's shirt off. "I …I can't do this. I just can't. I'm sorry."

"Oh, Christian. I'm sorry. I forgot about the marks." I take over for him as he walks out of the room never looking back.

* * *

"Sweetheart I'm so sorry. I forgot about the bruises. I would never have asked you to help. I just forgot about them." I try to apologize as I walk in our bedroom.

"It's okay. I don't know what happened to me. I just couldn't deal with it. I'm sorry." He apologizes looking up from his laptop. He is sitting on the bed in his boxers working again. Work always appears to be calming for him. He seems to turn to it when he is upset. I guess having to focus on work takes his mind off of everything else.

"It will be over in a couple of days. I'll try not to inflict that on you again." I tell him as I crawl up next to him.

He puts his arm around me and takes his glasses off. "I'm sorry I over reacted. I just haven't had to deal with that since….."

"I know. Christian, you have been just more than I could ever have hoped for today. I never expected that you would have to deal with all of this. I really thought that we would just drop them off and get them checked in and that would be it."

"Baby, one thing I've learned, nothing ever goes like you plan for it to. Always expect the unexpected."


	60. Chapter 60

_**Fifty Shades…Full Circle**_

_**Chapter 60**_

"Want me to run a tub?" he asks me.

"Yes. That would be wonderful." I groan back. Christian closes his laptop and puts it on the table then disappears into our bathroom. Soon the soothing sound of water running in our tub invades my head and as the tub fills I walk to the bathroom stripping down as I go. By the time I get there I'm down to panties. Christian puts his hands on my shoulders and drops them to my upper arms pulling me to him. As I cuddle up against his bare chest he briskly rubs his hands up and down my back. I love the way my breast feel as they press against his firm chest.

"It's been a long day." He kisses my head softly and inhales.

"Yes it has. Too long. I'm done in." I sigh back.

Christian strips his boxers off and I slide my panties off, then we both step over into the tub and sink down into the foamy warm water. Leaning back into Christian I melt into him as he wraps his arms around me. "God. I'd live here forever if I could."

"I'd let you. I love having my arms around you," he whispers.

"Christian? How long does it take to detox?"

"I don't know. Couple or three days I guess. At least that's what that Jerry guy said." He murmurs against my neck as he moves his lips across my skin.

"I had no idea. I don't really know anything about all of that but I hope it isn't too hard on her." I lean back into his chest and crook my neck to let him explore it with his tongue.

"Who knows. I'm sure it won't be pleasant." My body lightly shivers as he glides his hands over my breasts and down my tummy then spreads his hand over my abdomen.

"Christian. I saw what she did on the plane this afternoon."

"What?" he quickly stops and sits up.

"I saw Lorna come on to you. And I heard you threaten to throw her off the plane."

"I shouldn't have said that to her. I just can't stand to see women do that."

"Do what?"

"Offer themselves up like that. And I especially don't like her hitting on me after all you've done for her. You deserve better."

"How did you know she had gotten high in the bathroom?"

"I could just tell. Her eyes were glassy and her pupils dilated. She was jumpy and nervous. She just seemed to be on something. I've seen it before."

"You have? Where?"

"College and some of the girls in the clubs I went to when I first got back to Seattle, before I began to have private, contracted subs. I avoided them like the plague." Christian rubs my neck and shoulders. " I told Taylor to go over the plane with a fine tooth comb and make sure she didn't leave anything on the it somewhere. I'm not about to go to jail for her drug use."

"I'm sorry sweetheart. I never thought about her bringing drugs with her. I guess I'm just naive when it comes to all that stuff."

"I'd like you to stay that way. You don't need to be exposed to all of that."

"I called your mother. She can see Tommy tomorrow at noon. She's going to see him over the lunch hour since her schedule is already full."

"That's nice of her. A Pediatrician's schedule always stays full. Mom works constantly. I'm really surprised she hasn't thought about retiring. She's worked all her life."

"I think she likes it, sweetheart. Just like you do. I can't see you ever retiring."

"One day, after the kids have taken over the business, you and I will spend all day everyday together." He rests his chin on my shoulder and wraps his arms across my chest cupping and massaging my breasts. " We can travel. Go places we've never been. Do things we never got to do because Master Grey came along so soon after we got married."

"Mmm. Sounds good to me. I can't wait."

I can feel Christian growing against my back as he softly places kisses up my neck. "Mmm. You smell good." He whispers as he takes my earlobe between his lips. "Are you tired?"

"Yes. " I sit up and turn around straddling him. "But I'm never too tired for you." I whisper against his lips just before pressing my mouth to his and wrapping my arms around his neck. His hands travel down my slick, wet body cupping my cheeks and lifting me. As I slowly descend taking all of him in I gasp. Christian combs his fingers through my hair and cups my head. "You're so beautiful and I love you." His lips seal against mine and as our tongues meet and tangle, he is mine again and I am his.

* * *

My sleep is interrupted by a cry. "Oh God, who's that?" I groan.

"I think it's the kid," Christian groans back.

"I'll go see what's wrong. And his name is Tommy." I drag myself up and plant my feet on the floor. As I reach the guest room and flip on the lamp next to the bed, I see Tommy crying hysterically. "Come here, sweetheart. What's wrong?" I pull him into my lap and hold him tight wiping his tears with my fingers. "Shh. Shh. It's okay."

"Mama!" He continues to cry. " Where Mama?" he sniffles. "I wan Mama."

"Mama will be back soon. She doesn't feel good right now, but she's gonna' feel better soon and you can go see her." I continue to rock him and stroke his hair. "Do you need to go potty?"

He nods, so I take him in and let him use the bathroom, then take him back to bed. I lie down with him and rub his back until he falls back to sleep. It doesn't take long and I sneak back to our room and slide in next to Christian.

"I can't do this, Ana." He grumbles not turning over to look at me.

"I'm sorry. I think he's just homesick. He misses his mother." I try to tell him.

"This is gonna' happen every fucking night," he croaks clearing his throat.

"Surely not. I think he'll do okay as soon as he gets comfortable with us."

"How much you wanna' bet he wakes up crying tomorrow night?"

"Nothing. It's only for another night or two." I punch my pillow and snuggle down to fall back to sleep.

We lie there in silence for a few minutes. "Christian? Have you noticed how small he is? Maybe he had a small father. Lorna isn't too tall herself, but he couldn't weigh any more than Grace does."

"I think he hasn't had enough to eat." Christian groans. "He needs some food…..maybe a few Flintstones vitamins."

"And have you noticed that he isn't as far along as Grace? I mean I know, girls develop faster than boys, but Teddy was much more advanced at Tommy's age. He doesn't talk very much either. He points a lot."

Christian groans and turns over on his back and covers his eyes with his arm. "Sweetheart. The boy hasn't had the attention that our kids have had. We read to ours, we play with them, we spend time with them, we talk to them and most of all, we feed them." He sighs. "He's probably lucky if Lorna even notices him. By the looks of him, someone noticed him once too often."

"I wonder who hit him." I whisper.

"Who knows. It could have been the girl, or her pimp, or her dealer or a 'visitor'. It could have been anyone wandering through."

"You think Lorna had a pimp?" I ask.

"I imagine she did. She doesn't look capable of taking care of her own shit. She could have been pimped out by her dealer to pay for her drugs. Who the fuck knows? I just don't want to deal with it, at least not right now. I'm tired." He pulls me over and spoons me, "Come here and snuggle with me." Christian cups my breast and softly massages it until I hear his breathing slow and his hand stops then I know he's asleep.

* * *

Walking into the office of Bellevue Pediatric Associates, I check in at the desk and hand the receptionist the packet of records to give to Grace. Tommy and I have a seat in the waiting room which is still pretty full. I haven't been here very often. Since Grace can't treat our children, we use another pediatrician in the area, a good friend of hers. Looking down at Tommy, I really need to go get him some decent clothing. His are so worn and stained, obviously hand-me-downs or Good Will. That wouldn't be so bad if they weren't almost thread bare. And he has outgrown his little shoes.

Finally after a wait, the nurse, Beth, calls us and she takes us back to a room where the walls are covered in fairy tale characters and painted bright colors. Beth weighs him and measures his height. Then she takes his temperature. Tommy endures the inspection fairly well. Finally Grace comes in in her white coat carrying a chart. "Hello, darling." She sings and gives me a hug.

"Well. Hello sweetheart. How are you?" she quickly turns her attention to Tommy. She holds our her hands. "Want to come and see me?" Tommy looks timid, but crawls over into her arms. Grace sits down in a chair with Tommy in her lap and gently puts her stethoscope in her ears and presses it against Tommy's back then his chest listening to his lungs and heart. Beth hands her the otoscope and she gently sneaks a look into his ears. Tommy hardly notices he's getting the once over. "That's a good boy." She sings to him. Grace runs her hands over his arms and legs checking his limbs and joints. She turns him around to face her then has him look at her nose and then follow her finger. All of which he does. She stands up with him. "Now Sweetie, I'm going to put you on this table and feel your tummy. Is that okay?" Tommy gives her a nod. Grace raises his little shirt and his bruises become visible. I can see her nurse look away with a pained expression on her ace for a moment and take a deep breath. "It's okay Beth." She says to comfort her a bit.

Grace looks down at him and smiles, "Do these hurt darling?" she asks him as she gently presses on his marks. He shakes his head. "Good. Those boo boos will be gone in no time."

She asks him a few simple questions and then has him walk across the floor. "Is he still in diapers?" She asks me.

"Yes. I think he may be partially potty trained. I mean he will go in the potty if I ask him, but he won't ask to go."

"Probably got yelled at when he asked. Taught him not to. But that should change with some consistency and letting him know it's okay to ask to go potty."

Grace sits down in a chair and Tommy grabs a toy truck from the corner and begins to play with it.

"Well? What do you think?" I ask her.

"I think I want to do to someone what they did to him. But that isn't very productive. He looks pretty good considering. He's a little small for his age and developmentally he is a little slow, but his lungs sound pretty good for having had pneumonia. Reviewing his records, he's spent a lot of time in the hospital. That's probably been a blessing. That way he got all of his immunizations and they were able to keep on top of his respiratory issues. Probably kept him out of the line of fire for a while, too. What are you and Christian doing with him?" she asks.

"His mother had to go through detox before she could enter the rehab program and the facility wouldn't take him until she was admitted to the program."

"I see. So he is staying with you until that can happen?"

"Yes. It should only be for a couple of days."

"Well," she frowns and crosses her arms over her chest and rubs her lips. " Christian isn't going to like my recommendation."

"What? Why?" I ask.

"With him just getting out of the hospital and having the respiratory issues that he has, I can't recommend that he go to live in an environment like that. At least until he's better and stronger."

"What do you mean that type of environment?"

"Thrown in with all those other children and exposed to the exchange of germs. The colds and viruses. He's still just a bit fragile. I would recommend that he stay with you until he's a lot better." She looks over at me "How's Christian handling it?"

"Not too well. He got really upset last night when he saw all the bruises on Tommy. He was changing him and I had to take over. He just couldn't do it. And then Tommy woke during the night crying and I went in to get him back to sleep. Christian said that he would probably do it every night."

"He might. I can certainly empathize with you. I was hoping that this wouldn't bother Christian too much. Do you think he can deal with it?"

"I just don't know Grace. He seems okay, but I have no idea what's going on under the surface with him. John thought Christian might have trouble with it. He told him to call whenever he needed to."

Grace snorts, "He does that anyway doesn't he?"

"Yes. I'm afraid he does. Day or night. Grace, Christian isn't going to like this."

"Well. I'll call and talk to him. I think the best thing is for the child to stay with you until we get him built back up. Besides I think the one-on-one attention he'll get at your house will benefit him. How are Teddy and Grace taking it?"

"Okay, I guess. They just saw him for a short time last night and this morning, but they seem okay with it."

Grace has been constantly watching Tommy as she talks to me. "Okay. Well. I'll write some prescriptions to continue with the treatment they started at the hospital. Bring him back in in about two weeks. I want to listen to his chest again. I'll give you some things for his asthma and he seems to have a bit of eczema on his elbows and behind his ears. That goes along with the asthma sometimes. He'll probably outgrow it, but I'll give you something to put on that to help with the itching." Grace stands up, "Well, Tommy it was certainly nice to meet you." She puts out her hand and waits for him to shake it, but he has no clue and doesn't. "A little socialization will go a long way."

I walk over to pick him up and try to take the toy away from him. As I do his face wrinkles and I think he will cry. "Let him keep it." Grace says as she walks over and picks up the toy and hands it back to Tommy, "Here you go sweetheart. You can keep the truck." It causes him to break out in a smile. "Probably hasn't had too many toys in his life."

"Thank you Grace. I appreciate it." I tell her as we exit the exam room.

"I'm glad to do it. He certainly is a sweet thing. And don't worry I'll call and talk to Christian this evening. We'll get things worked out. Give Teddy and Grace a hug and kiss for me."

* * *

"I'm home. Where is everybody?" Christian bellows as he walks in the door and takes off his jacket. Grace and Teddy come running out of the family room to see their dad, followed closely by Jack bouncing and barking. I'm in my office working as Christian walks to the door carrying Grace.

"What are you doing?" he asks me.

"Just finishing up." I tell him looking up over my laptop. "I won't be a minute. Go get changed and we'll eat in about thirty minutes."

Christian kisses Grace's neck. " Mmm. How 'bout I take a big bite of that neck." Christian teases as Grace puts her arms around Christian's neck and won't let go.

"Ahhh. No, Doddy. No bite my neck." She squeals at a level that would make your ears bleed.

"Fu…Darn Grace. Don't yell in Daddy's ear like that Sweetie. You'll break my eardrum. Then I'll be deaf won't be able to hear you when you ask for a new dress." He sets her down and she giggles as Christian grabs Teddy and turns him upside down and shakes him.

"Christian. You're gonna' make him throw up." I stop to give Christian a quick kiss on his cheek.

"Where's, you know?" he whispers.

"You mean Tommy?" I ask.

"You know who I mean."

"I'm not sure. All three of them were in the family room playing and watching cartoons a few minutes ago. Teddy? Where is Tommy , sweetheart?" I ask.

"I don't know" he giggles as he hangs upside down in Christian's arms.

I look around and find him peering out from behind the sofa in the family room half hidden. "It's okay sweetie. You can come out and see us." I try to coax him out from behind the furniture.

He looks horrified as he watches Christian gently swat Teddy's little bottom as he holds him upside down. "Christian I think this is scaring him." I whisper to him.

"It's okay sweetheart. They are just playing. See Teddy is laughing? He's having fun." I try to walk over and pick him up, but he backs up a step or two.

Christian finally puts Teddy down and walks upstairs to get changed before dinner. I make my way to the kitchen to open a bottle of wine and pour Christian a drink before dinner.

"Hey Gail. Dinner smells great."

"I hope so. It's roast and vegetables. I thought that would be something everyone could eat. Do you think Tommy will eat it?" she asks.

I shrug as I pour two glasses. "I don't know. All we can do is try. He has to eat something. How was he today?"

"Fine. He's still really shy. I thought he was going to dig a hole and cover himself up when Jason tried to pick him up. I don't think he likes men very much."

"I've noticed that a bit. He's not real thrilled with Christian either. I hope that changes."

"Why?"

"Don't say anything, because Christian doesn't know yet, but Dr. Grey, doesn't want him to go to that child care center at the rehab facility. She doesn't think it will be good for him as sick as he has been."

"So where will he go?" Gail asks tentatively.

"She thinks he should stay here…with us. I told her Christian will blow a gasket, but she said she'd call and talk to him this evening. I want to give him several glasses of wine with dinner. mellow him out a bit before he talks to his mother." I give her a smirk.

"I don't think I want to be around for that call." Gail says as she pulls a sheet of rolls from the oven.

"How's Sophie?"

"She's fine. She's been with her mother a lot lately. Jason misses her. Ouch. Those are hot." She tosses the hot rolls into a serving basket.

"Well they smell divine."

"It's the yeast."

"Whatever it is. I'm ready for them. Yum. Has Myra mentioned anything about a wedding date? Just in passing maybe?" I ask.

"No. You know for being in the same house, I don't see a lot of her. I'm with the kids mostly and she is all over the house cleaning or running errands. Our paths don't seem to cross much."

"Hmm. I guess I really need to just ask her. If they are going to have the wedding here, I need to know something soon." I sigh and lean against the counter, " There is just so much going on. Christian still wants his grandmother to come for a visit. Dad and Myra are getting married and then today I got a wedding invitation for some close friends of ours. And now we have Tommy."

"It'll all fall into place. Go take Mr. Grey his wine. I'll call when dinner is ready." She smiles over at me.

"Okay. I know when I'm being thrown out of the kitchen." I smile and take off with the wine.

Christian is sitting on the sofa watching the kids play, well watching Teddy and Grace play. Tommy is just staring and looking around, but he is clutching the toy that Grace gave him today with a death grip.

"Here sweetheart." I hand Christian the wine and he takes a couple of big sips.

"Mmm. Good."

"Christian, we got a wedding invitation today. I left it on the table in the foyer for you to see."

"Really ? Who? I haven't sorted through the mail yet."

"Guess."

"Can you just tell me? I really don't want to guess."

"It's Jose and Amelia." I give him a big smile.

"'Bout time. When is the wedding?"

"In the fall. September. It will be in L.A., so I thought maybe we could take the new plane down, assuming it's finished by then. I'm sure Kate and Ethan got invitations, too, so maybe we can make a nice trip out of it."

He shrugs. "I don't see why not." He takes another big sip.

He sets his glass down on the table. "Whatcha' got there Tommy?"' Christian asks leaning forward his forearms resting on his knees.

Tommy pulls his toy closer and takes a step back. "My twuck," he mumbles.

"That's a fine truck. Where did you get it?" Christian is trying to make friends with him.

"My twuck. She gibed it to me." He looks like a scared little rabbit.

"I won't take your truck. I just wanted to see it." Christian tells him.

Tommy slowly shakes his head. "My twuck."

"Christian he's so scared." I whisper.

"Yeah. I know. Maybe we should just leave him alone and he'll come around."

"Your mother gave him the truck. He was playing with it in her office today and started to cry when I tried to take it away, so she gave it to him. He seems to really like it."

"Probably never had one before. That was nice of her." He leans back into the sofa and rests his hand on my thigh.

"Christian, your mother was so good with him. She was so friendly and gently. I think he felt comfortable with her."

"She's good at her job. Hard to be a pediatrician if you're mean to kids." He chuckles. Christian pulls my feet into his lap and starts to rub them.

"Ahh. I knew I kept you around for something, Grey." As I relax, I feel something poking on me and I look over to see Tommy tapping my arm. "What is it sweetie?" I ask him. He just stares up at me. "Tommy what do you want?" he still looks frightened. "Do you want to sit up here with me?"

He gives me a nod and I pull him up in to my lap as Christian continues to pleasure my feet. All is quiet as Tommy rests in my lap and Christian watches TV with Teddy and Grace. That is until he starts to tickle my feet. "Christian that tickles. Don't do that." I try to pull my feet away, but he holds them tight and continues to tickle. "Oh no, please don't. Let me go. " I pull and tug my legs but he won't release my feet. "Christian I mean it . Let me go. Please don't." Before we know it Tommy has crawled over and smacks Christians arm.

"No." he shakes his little head.

Christian is so taken aback all he can do is release my feet and stare at the child. "Okay." He holds his palms up in surrender.

"I'm glad someone is taking up for me." I chuckle and grab Tommy as he swats at Christian again. "It's okay. He wasn't hurting me, Sweetheart. We were just playing."

"Pwayin'?" he asks.

"Yes we were just having fun."

He shakes his head, "No hurt."

"No. No hurt." I look over at Christian. "Did you hear that? No hurt."

Tommy snuggles up next to me as he examines his toy. "My twuck." He looks up to tell me.

"Yes. I see your truck. It's a really nice truck. And it's all yours. No one will take your truck."

"Okay. Dinner is ready." Gail announces and we all take off to the dining area. "I need to get Tommy a booster seat so he can sit at the table." I mention.

"Why? He'll only be here another day or two." Christian asks.

"Well, I know, but we can donate it to the center when we are finished with it." I try to cover. "I had Gail pull out Grace's old high chair to use until we get one. She took the tray off so he can sit up to the table."

I get Grace situated and get her plate served and meat cut up, then do the same for Tommy who is sitting on her side of the table next to her. He digs in with his hands and starts shoving food in his mouth. He looks like he's eating his last meal.

"Ha. Look Mom. He eats with his hands." Teddy blurts out.

"Teddy shh. No one has ever taught him. We'll have to show him how to eat. But don't make fun of him, sweetheart." I whisper to him.

"Here Tommy. Here is your fork." I show him how to hold it in his hand and help him put food on it. He spills most of it on the way to his mouth. "That's okay. You'll get the hang of it. Just watch everybody and it will get easier. Just pretend you are eating ice cream. It works the same way."

Christian watches then says, "Probably never had to use one. I imagine he's lived mostly off of McDonalds and anything else you eat with your hands."

Tommy cleans his plate as usual. "Here. I done want dis. You can hab it if you still hungwy." Grace places a half-eaten buttered roll on Tommy's plate.

"Tank you." Tommy tells her as he picks up the roll and starts to eat it. It's so cute tears come to my eyes. Christian is giving Grace a smile. It's all so overwhelming it's all I can do to keep from crying.

"What's wrong Mom?" Teddy asks.

"Nothing sweetie. I think I'm just tired. But thanks for asking."

"Grace that was nice of you to share your roll with Tommy." I tell her.

"Uh, huh." She answers.

I have no answer for that and Christian just chuckles.

After dinner we clean up all the hands and mouths and depart for the family room again. Christian is slouched into the sofa channel surfing when the phone rings. It rings a second time and stops. In a few moments hear Gail. "Mr. Grey? It's Dr. Grey for you. It's on the house phone. You can take it in your office."

"Fine. Thanks Gail." He looks over at me. "Wonder what she wants?"

"Well there's only one way to find out. I'd go talk to her and see."


	61. Chapter 61

_**Fifty Shades…Full Circle**_

_**Chapter 61**_

I can faintly hear Christian talking from his office. He sounds fine so far. "Yes mother. How are you?" "Good. Yes, I'm okay." "The kids are all fine." "Mom? Did you want something? You don't usually make small talk." "Yes. Ana told me." "No, we haven't discussed anything about the visit." "Well we haven't actually had time. We've been dealing with three children since I got home from work and haven't had time to discuss the boy's checkup." "Okay. Well that's good." "Yes. I think you're probably right." I hear dead silence. "Yes, mother I heard you." "No. I don't agree. I don't think it's a good idea." "Look mother, I just don't think it's a good idea for anyone." "Because , I can't go into it right now." "No, I don't have fucking time to come over there right now and discuss it. " "Mother." "M.. Mother." "God damn it, Mother will you fucking listen to me?" " I said no." Okay, it's taken a turn and his voice is really bouncing off of the walls. "Because it's not fucking good for the kids, or Ana and me and it's certainly not good for him." We can hear him pretty clearly down the hall now.

Grace looks at me and gasps , "Doddy say the fuk wood, Mama."

"Shh. It'll be okay. Just watch TV."

"Because GOD DAMNIT I…" Silence. "Yes. I'm sorry Mother. Forgive me I wasn't thinking." "I apologize." "Yes. Okay." "I understand and I know you're right about it." "I'll talk to Ana." "Yes." "Okay." "And mother, I am sorry, I shouldn't have talked to you like that." "Okay." "Yes. I love you too." "Good bye Mother."

"God Damn, mother fuckin' piece of shit!" I hear a crash.

"You kids stay here. I'll go see about your father." I quickly get up and run to his office only to see him pacing, rubbing his neck and muttering curses under his breath.

"Christian?" I arrive to see the phone in pieces on the floor. "Sweetheart? What happened?"

"That was my mother."

"Yes. We heard you in the family room. Grace commented on your vocabulary choices."

"I suppose you know what that was about?" he asks hands on his hips and feet planted firmly on the carpet.

"Well. I'm not sure. Can you give me a hint?"

"Stop being coy. It's not becoming. You know damn well what she called about. Why didn't you discuss it with me before she called?"

"Well we have been dealing with three children since you got home from work and I haven't had time to discuss the boy's visit with you." I try to smile. " Yes. I believe that's the reason. Sweetheart. I'm sorry. I told your mother that this would be a problem, but she was adamant about it and said she wanted to talk to you. I didn't know whether to bring it up or not."

Christian leans back against his desk. "Why? I just don't understand why won't anyone listen to me?" he rubs his hands over his face in frustration. "Ana this will be disastrous. Baby, you know it will." His tone is one of resignation as he walks over and puts his arms around me.

"Maybe not. Christian it wasn't my idea. I was prepared for him to go to the rehab facility in the next day or two. Your mother didn't think he was well enough to be exposed to all the other kids with their germs." I try to explain. "Sweetheart. I know this isn't what you wanted. I'm sorry. We're caught between a rock and a hard place. There really isn't any other option but to take care of him."

"Well, the girl will have to agree to it. If he's going to be here for a while, I want it all in writing. I'll have something drawn up for her to sign. We'll see how it goes for a while. But he's going back as soon as he can."

"Yes. I agree. We'll just take it a day at the time and see what happens." I look up at him, "Maybe it won't be as bad as you think."

"Yes it will," he audibly exhales. "I feel like I just need to bend over and take it like a man. Will you at least kiss me first?" He teases.

"Of course I will. And if you're really good, I'll spring for a little lube too." I swat him and smile. "Sweetheart, the kids seem to be getting along so far."

"Ana, he's only been here twenty four hours. I don't want Teddy or Grace resenting the time you spend with the boy."

"I don't think they will. I'm trying to show them just as much attention." I try to reason with him. "And they seem to like him. I think it will be fine."

"Well, I guess we'll wait and see." He puts his arm around my shoulder and we walk back to the family room. "I fucking hate it when my mother does that."  
"Does what?"

"Treats me like I'm ten years old. It makes me feel like I'm ten years old," he growls.

"Baby to her you are still ten."

"I know. It just pisses me off, that's all."

"What do you want me to do with the remnants of the phone?" I ask him.

"Fuck it. They can clean it up tomorrow and order a new one."

I can't help but smile as we watch the kids. Teddy and Grace are on the floor watching TV and picking at each other. Tommy has crawled over close to them. He looks like he wants to join in, but he's still so shy. He's clinging to that old plastic truck like it was a life raft, refusing all requests by anyone to look at it. Christian is stretched out on the sofa with his head in my lap watching the TV or probably more the kids. It's comfortable. It feels nice.

"Dad? When are we going sailing?" Teddy turns around and asks his dad. "Remember you promised?"

"Oh. I don't know. When do you want to go?" I think he's almost asleep from me massaging his scalp.

"Can we go this weekend?" Teddy lights up and runs over to the sofa and kneels next to it resting his elbows on the sofa a few inches from Christian.

"I don't see why not. We can go Saturday morning."

"Really? Really Dad?"

Christian smiles and grabs him dragging him up on the sofa, wrapping him in his arms and spooning him. "Sure Sport. We'll leave early and catch some breakfast on the way to the marina. Would you like that?"

"Yeah. Just you and me, huh?"

"Yep, sport. Just you and me." Christian kisses Teddy's head and hugs him.

"Whots sawin?" Tommy looks over and asks.

"That's when we go out on our boat." Christian explains.

"Boat? Whea da boat?" he asks.

"It's out at the marina." Christen tells him.

"Yeah. That's a place where you park boats." Teddy offers.

"Oh. Ukay."

"Haven't you ever been on a boat before?" Teddy asks him.

Tommy shakes his head. "Uh uh. No. I neba seed a boat."

"You've never seen a boat?" Teddy asks so disgusted.

"No." Tommy shakes his head again and rubs his eyes.

"Well, maybe we can take you out on the boat sometime." Christian tells him.

"But not tomorrow. It's just Dad and me this time." Teddy makes sure Tommy understands.

"Ukay. Jus you and Dad dis time."

"He's not your dad. He's my dad. You can't call him dad." Teddy insists.

"Oh. Histh name not Dad?" Tommy asks so confused.

"I guess we never told you what to call him, did we Tommy?" I ask.

Christian releases Teddy and sits up. "Christian? What do you think? I don't think he can say Mr. Grey." I whisper.

"Tommy, you can call me Christian."

"Oh. No dad?" Tommy asks.

"Fuck this is hard to explain." Christian whispers back.

"Well…" Christian stops and holds out his hand. "Come here a minute."

Tommy looks horrified and freezes clutching his truck. "Son, I won't hurt you. I promise. Can you come see me a minute?...Please."

Tommy gets off the floor and timidly walks over to the sofa and stands next to me. Christian reaches over and takes his arm and pulls him over to where he is sitting. Tommy's eyes immediately fill with tears and his chin begins to quiver. Christian gently picks him up and sets the boy on his lap. He holds his hands up in surrender. "See. I won't hurt you. I just want to talk to you. Understand?"

Tommy slowly nods as his bottom lip shakes. "I wanted to explain something to you. Teddy and Grace call me dad because I'm their father , their daddy. Daddy isn't my name. My name is Christian. You may call me Christian. Can you say that?"

"K wis ten." Tommy tries to say.

"That's right. Christian." He points to me. "And that is Ana. Can you say Ana?"

Tommy nods. "Now, Teddy and Grace call her Mom and they call me Dad. You will call her Ana and me Christian. Can you do that?"

"Uh, huh. I twy to 'emember." Tommy rubs his eyes and leans over resting his head on Christian's chest.

"I think someone is worn out. Would you like a bath and then get into your pajamas?" I ask him.

He nods as he leans against Christian who is taking it a lot better than I thought. "Are you kids ready for bed?" I ask

"Mom. Can't we stay up and watch one more program? Please."

"Well, okay. I'll get Tommy tucked in and then be back for you two. You've got thirty more minutes."

I stand up and reach out for Tommy. "I can carry him up." Christian says. "You don't need to be lugging all these kids around."

"Since when?" I ask. "I always lug my kids around."

"I know. But I'm here to help. Besides, I don't want him to be afraid of me." He stands up holding Tommy who rests his head on Christian's shoulder. "Come on. I'll help you get him to bed."

Christian runs a tub of water, while I get Tommy undressed down to his skivvies. Gail was so good to go out and buy some things for him this afternoon. A few clothes and some pajamas of his own and some underwear and new tennis shoes. He was happy to get them. He loves the tennis shoes. I take his hand and lead him to the bathroom where Christian has just turned off the water and laid out a towel and washcloth. He looks over and notices the bruises that are fading but still visible. "Well, I'll let you get his bath and I'll go back down to watch the kids."

"Okay. I whisper to him. "Thank you."

I get Tommy out of his undies and set him over in the water and bubbles. Kneeling next to the tub I get him all lathered up and washed down while he clings to the plastic truck. "Tommy. I think we need to wash your hair tonight. Okay?"

"Ukay. Wash hair." He agrees. He doesn't fight like Grace does; instead he looks almost relaxed and happy to have it done.

As I massage the shampoo into his scalp he is so still and quiet, just leaning his head back.

"Wath a dad?" he asks in that timid little voice.

"Oh, well…" It never occurred he wouldn't know what a dad is. "Dad is another name for father. You know like Mom is mother. A dad is a parent."

"But wha isth it?" he insists.

"Well mommies are girls and daddies are boys, but they are sort of the same thing. They take care of the kids." Well that sucked, but it's all I've got.

"Whea's mama?" he asks.

"Sweetheart, she isn't feeling well. Remember when you were sick and stayed at the hospital?"

He gives me a nod as I rinse his hair. "Well, mommy is staying at the hospital right now. She'll be back when she feels better."

"Oh. But I done habe a dad." He shakes his head.

"Well, I think you might. We just don't know where he is."

"He lost?" he asks.

"I guess you could say that."

"We find him?"

"Maybe we can find him one day."

"'Eddy an Gwace habe a dad. I no habe a dad." He looks so dejected.

"But you have a mommy."

"Uh huh. Mama come home soon." He holds his truck up. "I sow her my twuck when she feews betta."

"That's right. I'm glad you like the truck. It was nice of Dr. Grace to give it to you."

"Uh huh. My twuck."

"Well are you ready to get out?"

He nods and I pull him out of the tub and wrap him in a towel, drying his hair. "Okay let's get you into your pajamas." I pull his new pajamas out of the drawer and help him into them after I put on a pull up, just in case of accidents. He looks down and watches as I button up the top to the pajamas. "I wike ajamas." He grins.

"Good sweetheart. I'm glad you like them. These fit better than the ones we borrowed from Teddy."

He nods and smiles. All of a sudden I just want to cry looking at him. I just feel all of this stuff going on inside and I know I can't let myself do that. That blonde hair and green eyes punctuated by those dimples in his cheeks are just trying to crawl into my heart. "Okay. Time for bed." I pull down his covers and help him crawl up into bed. " Want to read a story?" I ask.

He shakes his head, "I can weed. I done know how."

"Well, I meant do you want me to read one to you?" I rub his head and he gives me a grin. "Yesth peese."

I retrieve a book from Teddy's room and sit up on the bed with him and put my arm around him as I hold the book on my lap so he can see it.

"Whot dat?" he points to the cover of the book.

"It's called , Horton Hears a Who." I open the book and begin to read…"On the fifteenth of May, in the Jungle of Nool, In the heat of the day, in the cool of the pool, he was splashing….enjoying the jungle's great joys…When Horton the elephant heard a small noise."

"Dats a ew- wel- pant." Tommy smiles and points to a picture of Horton.

"That's right. Horton is an elephant." I continue on for several pages.." And the Kangaroo says, 'Of course. All you have to do is admit to everyone...that there are no little people living on that speck...that you were wrong and I was right. You do that, and things can go right back to the way they were. But if you don't...you're going to have to pay the price'."

Then Horton tells him, ' Heh. So I just have to say it isn't true. Hmmm. Go ahead-rope me, cage me. Do whatever you want. But there are people on that speck...and they have a mayor who has 96 daughters and 1 son named Jojo who all share a bathroom, whatever that is. And even though you can't hear or see them at all...a person's a person, no matter how s.. m.. all.' " Crap I forgot that was in this book. I can feel the tears well in my eyes and I really try to contain them, but after trying to read a bit more they begin to fall down my face.

"Can we finish this tomorrow night sweetheart?" I ask trying not to alarm him.

"You feewl bad?" he asks as he looks up at me.

"I'm okay. I just got a little sad for a minute."

"Ukay. We finish tomowow nite." He snuggles down under the covers and I tuck him in kissing his head. "You sleep tight. I'll see you in the morning." I whisper to him.

As I sneak out of his room and turn off the light I can't help but give into the sadness. The tears come like a raging storm and I walk into our bedroom and lie down on my side on the bed clutching a pillow. Pulling my knees up to my chest I try covering my mouth to stifle the sound of the sobs. For some reason this feeling has just consumed me. I miss my little boy. I miss Sam. I wanted to hold him so much. I wanted to count his fingers and his toes. I wanted to see if he looked like me or Christian; what color was his hair, his eyes. I wanted to feel him against my skin and smell his scent. I needed him and I miss him. I miss him so much I want to die sometimes. I wish I could find some way to fill this horrible, empty, space where he is supposed to be.

I jump as I feel the bed move and a hand touches my shoulder. "Sweetheart? Ana what is it baby?" Christian whispers. "Why are you crying? Did something upset you?"

I turn over to stare up at him and wrap my arms around his neck pulling myself to him. I continue to sob into his neck as he caresses my hair and holds me. "I'm sorry. I just got upset for a minute." I try to explain.

"I can see you're upset. What happened?" he whispers.

"I was reading Tommy a story. I forgot and read, Horton Hears a Who."

"Oh. I'm sorry. Maybe we need to get rid of that book." He suggests still holding me.

"No. For some reason, it just hit me and I lost it for a minute." I try to sniffle and dry my eyes. "I'll be okay. "

"I love you." He murmurs against my ear.

"I know. I love you too. Can I just stay here for a minute?" I ask.

"I want you in my arms forever. I'll never let you go." He says into my hair while holding me tighter against him.

"I always feel so safe when you hold me."

"You are safe with me, Sweetheart."

"No. I mean my heart. My heart feels safe with you."

"The greatest gift I've ever been given was when you gave your heart to me and I will always treasure it and keep it safe. You're my life." He looks in my eyes and wipes my cheeks with his fingers.

"I'm so glad you love me."

"How could I not love you?" he asks. "You're the most precious thing in the world to me." "Ana, you can talk to me…about anything. If you need to talk about Sam…."

"I just hate to upset you."

"You won't upset me. Besides even if I do get upset, I have a right to. He was my son, too. I miss him every day. I would give anything if he could be here with us. "

"I know sweetheart. I know you miss him. Maybe we should talk about him more. Maybe it would be good for us."

"Do you want to tell me about it?" he asks.

"There's nothing to tell. I just miss him so much sometimes. Sometimes the feeling just blindsides me….like tonight. I feel silly getting upset."

"Can I tell you something?" he pushes my hair behind my ear. "The other day I was sitting in my office and I heard Olivia out in reception talking to Andrea and showing her the baby. And…it blindsided me too. All I could do is get up and go into the bathroom and close the door for a while."

"Oh, Christian. I'm so sorry. I wish I could have been there for you." I look up at him and the moisture around his eyelashes is glistening, so I take my thumbs and wipe his eyes and give him a smile.

"You were. Promise not to laugh?" he asks.

"Laugh? Of course not."

"Sometimes I talk to you. I mean during the day when I'm at work or wherever. Sometimes I just feel you so close and when I need you, I just talk to you."

"Do I answer?"

"Yes. But I will admit kissing you in spirit is rough. For that, I like you to actually be in the same room with me," he chuckles.

I reach up cupping his head and press my lips to his sliding them over each other. "I'd prefer to be in the same room when we kiss too."

Christian smiles and wraps his arms around my waist and he pulls me tightly to him. "Thank you." I tell him.

"For what?"

"For telling me that."

"What for telling you that I talk to thin air?"

"Yes. The fact that you do it means more to me than you'll ever know."

He kisses my forehead and gives me a smile. "Let's go put our kids to bed. I feel like being in the same room with you for a while."


	62. Chapter 62

_**Fifty Shades…Full Circle**_

_**Chapter 62**_

""Hello. This is Anastasia Grey. I'd like to speak with Lorna Blakely please."

"I'm sorry Mrs. Grey, but Lorna isn't allowed any calls yet."

"Yes. That's what the operator told me, but I'm keeping her child and also covering the cost of her stay and treatment. Are you sure I can't speak with her?"

"I'm sorry. Is there something wrong with her child?"

"On, no. I just…."

"I'll be glad to pass along any information that you need to give her, but she is still detoxing and really isn't well right now."

"I see. Do you have any idea when she'll be able to transfer to the rehab center?"

"These things can take several days sometimes up to a week. We just have to wait and see how she does and how quickly her body responds. And even after she transfers over, they have a policy of no outside contact for at least a week or two."

"Um. Okay. I basically wanted to check on her. Is she okay?"

"Yes ma'am. She's feeling pretty rough. She's been through the wringer, but I think she'll be fine. It's just going to take time."

"Well. Okay. Can you tell her that I asked about her when she is able?"

"Yes, ma'am. I'll be glad to see that she gets the message."

"Okay. Thank you."

Well that went about as I expected. I really want to know what's going on. I need to be finishing up on these files sitting on my desk, I think as it sit at my desk and flip my pen between my fingers. Maybe Christian could get John to call and see how she is doing. As I reach for my cell, it rings and scares the shit out of me. Looking at the screen I see it's Paul.

"Paul?"

"Yes. Ana I was just calling to check on you. How are things going?" he asks.

"Great. I'm really loving it. You sound awfully chipper this morning. How are things on the East coast?"

"Well, I wouldn't know, I'm in L.A. actually."

"L.A.? What are you doing there?"

"There are just some business things I promised to check on for Susannah."

"Oh? How is Susannah?"

"I don't really know. We aren't together anymore."

"Oh, Paul. I'm so sorry. Are you okay?"

"Yes. Yes I'm fine. There were just too many things that weren't quite right. I think that night in Sacramento was the final straw. But everything is good. We parted on good terms. In fact I'm checking on this business for her while I'm out on the coast."

"Well that's nice of you. I didn't know Susannah had any business interests out here."  
"She doesn't, not really. She had a friend, who actually was from Seattle…."

"Was?"

"Yes. Seems Susie was somehow involved in some beauty salons with her. The woman died not long ago and left everything to someone else, including the interest Susie had in it."

"Oh, really?" I sit upright in my chair. "If Susie owned part of the company how could the woman just give it so someone else?"

"Well it seems that all their dealings were done on a handshake; between friends type of thing. Can you believe that? Susie gave her a cash infusion as a friend and then when she died she left it to someone else and Susie wants to recoup her investment."

"Hmm. Sounds like that might be tricky. If she doesn't have anything in writing that might be difficult to prove."

"I told her that. It all boils down to making a bad decision. I doubt she'll ever see the money again, but I told her I'd check into it."

"Well good luck with that."

"Right. Well I called to check on you and to tell you what a great job you're doing. Jim told me that you saved that Elliott Colton book for us."

"I don't know if I saved anything. I just stroked him a bit and convinced him we could turn his 'work of art' into a 'masterpiece'." I giggle into the phone. "I'm teasing. It'll never be a masterpiece, or work of art for that matter, but I think it will sell."

"Yes. I think it will too. I appreciate your effort. Do you need anything? Are they treating you well?"

"Yes. I appreciate it Paul. Everything is fine and I really love my job. I'll always be grateful for the opportunity."

"Well, you deserved it. And I'm glad you decided to work with us. Hey, how's that husband of yours?"

"He's fine. Busy."

"I guess he is. I heard about the Vanderberg acquisition."

"He was happy about that. He had worked on it for quite some time."

"I'm sure he did. Ana I can't figure out why you are working. Why aren't you using all your time being a billionaire's wife?"

"Paul, I never wanted to be a billionaire's wife. I just happened to fall in love with one. Christian and I really do try to keep things as normal as possible for the kid's sake and we like it that way. I went to school to be an editor and that's what I want to do. It makes me happy. I have my kids, my husband and my job and I like it that way."

"Well, I admire that. Do you have a single sister hidden anywhere?"

I have to laugh, "No. Sometimes I wish I did. Paul, you're a good man. Someone will pop up when you least expect it."

"I'm not worried about it. Well, take care and I'll keep in touch. Call me if you have any problems."

"I will. Thanks Paul."

I click the phone off and pitch it on my desk and can't help but wonder if Susannah was in cahoots with Elena on her salons. Wonder if Christian knows? God I hope not, but it just sounds too likely. I just never stops. I bury my face in my hands and rub my eyes as it sinks in.

"Ma'ma?" I hear a tiny voice and look up to see my little girl peering around the corner.

"Hey Gracie girl." I hold out my arms to her. "Come here, baby." Grace runs over and I scoop her up into my lap. "What's going on sweetie?" I give her a squeeze and kiss her head as I hold her close.

"Are you workin'?"

"Well, I am but I can take a break. Do you need anything?"

"No. I want to see you."

"Well. I'm glad. I like seeing you." I give her pink cheek a kiss. "Where are Teddy and Tommy?"

"I done know. I fink they are outside pwayin'."

"Okay. Didn't you want to go outside?"

"No." She shakes her head. "Mama?"

"Yes sweetheart?"

"How long is dat boy goin' to stay?"

"You mean Tommy?"

"Uh, huh. Tommy."

"Well, until his mommy feels better. Probably a couple of weeks. Why?"

"I justh wondrin'."

"Don't you like him?"

"Uh huh. I do. He pways wif me some. Teddy dudn't pway wif me."

"Well Teddy is a lot older than you are. You and Tommy are about the same age. Maybe you have more in common with him."

"Uh huh. I do. He pways dolls and tea party wif me. I wike dat."

"That's nice of him. I'm glad you like him." I continue to cuddle her. "Do you think Teddy gets along with him?"

"I fink so. Dey fight sometime."

"They do? What do they fight about?"

"Justh stuff."

"What kind of stuff?"

She shrugs. "Boy stuff. Can we hab lunch now?"

"Okay. I guess it is about time for lunch. What's Gail fixing?"

"I fink soup and thanwishes."

"Okay. Let's go see if it's ready."

I sit down with all three while they enjoy 'red'soup, as Grace calls tomato soup, and bologna and cheese sandwiches with milk. I have a chicken salad salad. Gail joins me having a salad. Christian would have a fit if he knew Gail ate with the children and me when he's away. As much as he thinks of her, she's still staff in his eyes. I know he hates it when I get too close to them, but I can't help it. Gail has been a second mother to me and she has helped me raise these children. I understand the need for distance when it comes to staff, but it's just the way I handle it. I do keep the appearance of distance when he's around, but I think he suspects it's different when he's away.

"Teddy? What have you been up to this morning?" I ask my son.

"Nuffin'. Just playin'."

"What have you been playing?"

He shrugs. "Just stuff."

"Okay. Tommy how about you? What have you been doing this morning?"

"Huh?" he asks as he slurps his soup from his spoon.

"What have you been up to this morning?" I ask again.

"I be good. I not be a bad boy." He shakes his head. Gail reaches over and pats his arm. "Of course you've been a good boy, sweetheart."

"Tommy, I can't imagine you ever misbehaving."

"Uh huh. Terwy say I be a bad boy."

"Terry? Who's Terry sweetheart?" I ask.

"He mama's fwiend. He not like me vewy much. I be a bad boy."

"Oh. Well I think he must have been mistaken. And you aren't a bad boy."

"Ukay."

"Do you see Terry very much?" I ask him.

"Uh huh." He nods as he takes a huge bite of his sandwich. "He bisits mama a wot."

"He does?"

He nods. "He bwings her pwesents. Mama wikes him."

"Oh. Does he bring you presents too? Do you like Terry?"

"Uh uh. He neba bwing me a pwesent. He no wike me. He scawy. He make me and mama cwy sometimes."

"He makes you cry?" I realize I can't pursue this in front of my kids.

"Sometimes."

"Can we talk about this after a while?" I ask him.

"Uh huh."

"I just noticed. Jack's not begging. Where is he?" I ask.

"Oh, Jason dropped him at the vet this morning. He's getting a check-up and grooming."

"Grooming?"

"Yes. You know, nails trimmed, teeth brushed, a bath. All that good dog stuff."

"Oh. Okay. I just sort of missed him." I take my last bite. "Well I have a few more things to do. Are you guys ready for a rest?"

"Aw Mom. I'm too big for a nap." Teddy whines.

"Well, maybe you are getting a bit big, but I know Grace and Tommy could probably use a rest after lunch. And it wouldn't hurt for you to have a little quiet time. You don't have to go to sleep. You can read a book or something."

"I'll get them taken care of." Gail assures me as she starts to clear the table.

"I need to finish up a few things and then I'll come up and visit for a while, okay?"

Leaving the table I walk back to my office and sit down at my desk. I tap on my phone for a bit.

* * *

'Hey good looking. What are you up to?'

* * *

'Don't tell my wife, but I'm texting a very sexy woman I know. What are you up to?'

* * *

'Missing you. I didn't get my usual morning….um…..wake up call, shall we say?'

* * *

'Sorry, I failed my marital duties. I had an early meeting. Trying to avoid a trip. Can I make it up to you this evening?'

* * *

'I'll hold you to it, Mr. Grey. In fact there are several things of yours I'd like to hold about now.'

* * *

'Tell me more.'

* * *

'I'll let you use your imagination.'

* * *

'You have no idea how dangerous that is.'

* * *

'Oh, I think I can guess. Think about it this afternoon and then show me when you get home.'

* * *

'Count on it. I'll be home early. Prepare yourself Mrs. Grey.'

* * *

'Consider me prepared and ready…..as always.'

* * *

'And you expect me to try to work the rest of the afternoon after that?'

* * *

'Yes. Just consider this evening a reward for a job well done.'

* * *

'Damn. You drive me to distraction. Let me get back to work, or I'll be home in 30 minutes.'

* * *

'In case I forgot to tell you….I love you madly, Mr. Grey.'

* * *

'You're mine, Mrs. Grey….only mine. I love you baby. Later. Cxx'

* * *

'Looking forward to it. Love you. Ana'

* * *

Damn he makes me smile. Well, it looks like I have a date this evening. Lucky me. After ascending the stairs I take a trip down to Teddy's room and peek in. He is on his bed reading a book. "Hey there. May I come in?"

"Sure, Mom." He sits up on the bed and I sit down next to him. Pulling him in my arms I lean back and he rests his head on my tummy. "How's it going Sweetheart?"

"Okay."

"Good. Is having Tommy here bothering you?" I ask him.

I can feel him shrug. "Naw. I don't guess so. I mean I don't really know why he's here, but, I guess he's okay."

"Well it's like I told you. His mother is sick and he doesn't have any relatives to take care of him. So we're going to take care of him for a while."

"I don't understand, Mom. Why doesn't he have a Dad or a grandmother or anyone to take care of him?"

"I know it's difficult to understand. But his mother doesn't have any family and his Dad moved away and they don't know where he is. So Tommy and his mother are all alone. They don't have anybody to help them."

"So we're helping them?"

"Yes. That's what we're doing. Grace said that you fight with him sometimes. What do you fight about?"

"Grace has a big mouth."

"Teddy. She didn't tell on you. It just came out while we were talking." I pull him tighter.

"We don't really fight. It's just sometimes he gets in the way."

"In the way of what?"

"Dad isn't his dad. He's my dad. I don't like it when Daddy…oh, I don't know."

"You don't like it when Daddy pays attention to him. You feel like it takes attention away from you."

"Uh huh."

"Teddy don't ever feel that way. You and Grace are the most important things in the world to your father. He loves you more than anything. Just because he is nice to Tommy doesn't lessen what he feels for you. Can you understand that?"

"Yes ma'am. I guess."

"Sweetheart. Tommy has had a very hard little life. Things haven't always been very good for him. I think even you know that. Your Dad is just trying to be nice to him while he's here, that's all."

"Does he like Tommy?"

"I think he does, but it's not the same as it is with you and Grace. You are his children and he loves you both. Tommy will be going back to his mother in a while. Can we be nice to him while he's here?"

"Yes, ma'am."

"I love you Teddy. You're my little boy. No one can ever take your place in my heart. Maybe you and Dad can talk about it when you go sailing Saturday."

"Hey. I forgot about that. Yeah. Me and Dad can talk about stuff while we're on the boat."

"You sure can. Just you and daddy."

"You love daddy, don't you Mom?"

"Oh, Teddy. You have no idea. I love him very much, sweetheart."

"He loves you too. He told me."

"He did? When was that?" That's a surprise.

"When we were talking about growin' up and stuff. He was tellin' me about girls and he said he hoped one day I would love one as much as he loves you."

"That was sweet of him to say that." Sitting up I let him go and smooth his hair. "Well. I'll let you get back to your book, sweetie. I just wanted to make sure you understood that your dad and I love you."

"Okay." He gives me a Teddy smile as I get up and walk to the door. "Mom?"

"Yes, sweetheart?"

"I'll be nice to Tommy."

I give him a smile back, "Okay. Thank you baby. I love you."

After a short trip back down the hall, I look in on Tommy. He is sound asleep on the big guest bed clutching that truck. Maybe we need to get him a few toys. Our kids have so many and all he has is this plastic truck that came from a doctor's waiting room. After walking in I lean over and gently rake my fingers through is blonde curls. He stirs momentarily and mumbles something about 'mama'. About the time I turn to leave, I hear, "An?"

"Yes sweetheart." I turn to look at a sleepy Tommy turning over and rubbing his eyes. "I'm sorry I didn't mean to wake you."

"I not asweep."

I have to smile, "Yes you were." I sit on the bed next to him and he crawls over resting his head in my lap. He snuggles in as I rub his head. "Sweetie, can you tell me some more about Terry?"

He gives out a big yawn. "Terwy done wike me."

"I remember you said that. Why didn't Terry like you?"

"Terwy wikes mama. I be a bad boy."

"Tommy, I told you, you aren't a bad boy sweetheart." My hand moves from his head down to his shoulders and I rub his little back. "Why did he think you were a bad boy?"

"I done know. He said I be in da way. I twied to not be."

"You tried not to be in the way?"

"Uh huh. I twied to hide but he can fine me."

"What happens when he finds you sweetheart?"

"He makes mama cwy thometimes."

"I'm sorry. That's not very nice to make mama cry." I continue to stroke his back. "Why does he make mama cry?"

"Thometimes he bwings a fwiend and mama has to wike dem." He raises his head and looks up at me with innocent little green eyes. "I done wike it when dat happens."

"Why?"

"Terwy put me in the bafwoom and make me wait dhere. I done wike the bafwoom. He make mama cwy when I in da bafwoom."

I pull him up in my lap had wrap him in my arms. "Oh, sweetheart. No one will ever lock you in a bathroom again. I promise you that. And you are a good boy. You are a very, very good boy."

"I be a good boy. I can hide and not be in da way."

"Baby, you aren't in the way."

"I hab to fine mama."

"You don't have to find her. We know where she is. Remember she is in the hospital?"

"Uh huh. But she might sweep too much. I hab to fine Angie when she sweep too much. Angie tell me to."

"Who is Angie?"

"She mama's fwiend. She tell me to get her when mama sweep too much. She wives nex door."

"I see. Do you like Angie?"

"Uh huh. Sometime she hide me."

"She does? She hides you from Terry?"

"Uh, huh. When Terwy mad, Angie come to get me and I go wif her."

"Sweetheart. Can you tell me who hurts you? Who gave you the boo boos?"

"I hab boo boos." He points to his arms with the fading bruises.

"Yes. I know, but they are getting better."

"Uh huh. Getting' bettew."

"Tommy…who made the boo boos? Did Terry do that?"

"Thometime he did."

"Did someone else give you boo boos too?"

"Uh huh. Thometime, mama get mad at me. I be in the way and she get mad. I twy to hide, but I get in the way."

"You don't have to hide anymore. And no one is going to give you boo boos anymore."

"No more boo boo? Where Terwy?"

"I don't know where Terry is, but you won't ever have to see him again. Do you understand?"

"Ukay. I no wike Terwy. I done hab to see him."

"No you don't." Tommy looks up at me a gives me a huge yawn. "I think you need to finish you're nap."

"Ukay."

"Tommy? Thank you for talking to me. I like it when you talk to me and I want you to talk to me whenever you want to. Okay?"

"Ukay."

I give him a kiss and cover him with a light coverlet then turn out the light as I leave the room. Good God in heaven. What has that child been through? What did Christian go through? No wonder being around Tommy is so difficult for him. I just need to make sure that Tommy never has to live that sort of life again. Lorna either. I can't imagine what life must be like for her. And that Terry asshole. What did he make her do? I pray that this rehab stint works and she can get back on track. And thank God she gave me that phone back. I don't want anyone trying to find her.

"Hi Gail. Thanks for getting the kids down." I tell her as I grab a sparkling water from the fridge.

"You know they're never a problem. And that Tommy. I was skeptical at first, but he's just a sweetheart. He breaks my heart."

"I know. I've just been up talking to him. For his age he's very open about what happened to him. That three year old has a lot of mileage on him." After I unscrew the cap I toss it in the garbage and take a big drink.

"Really? What did he say?" Gail asks as she finishes putting the dishes away.

"Well trying to piece things together, I gather that this Terry character was Lorna's dealer and he seemed to visit often and occasionally bring 'guests' for Lorna to 'like' as Tommy put it."

"Oh, good Lord in heaven. I just can't imagine." Gail leans against the kitchen counter and folds her arms across her chest.

"He said that he got in the way and Terry would lock him in the bathroom while Lorna 'liked' him and the guest. And then there is this person named Angie that lives next door and Tommy has to go get her when Lorna sleeps too much. I can only imagine that means when she's asleep after taking whatever it is she takes." "Seems this Angie also comes to get him sometimes when Terry comes to visit."

"Maybe this Angie person isn't so bad."

"Maybe not. He said Terry gave him the 'boo boos' sometimes and sometimes it was …."

"Lorna?" Gail adds.

I nod. "Yes. Sometimes it was Lorna." I sigh. "I really hate that." I stare out into space as I recount the conversation. "Did I tell you she used drugs and tried to hit on Christian while we were on the plane coming home?"

Gail audibly inhales. "Oh no. She didn't."

I snort, "Christian threatened to pitch her out the plane door if she didn't stop."

"That sounds about right. He doesn't put up with much."

"No, he doesn't." I come out of my trance. "Well, I have work to finish and I have a sneaking suspicion, Mr. Grey may be home a little early this evening."

"Okay. Want me to move dinner up?"

"Um. No. I think leave it at the usual time. I want to talk to him when he gets home."

"Okay. I'll have some hors d'oeuvrs ready for him to have with his drink when he gets in."

"Thanks Gail." I give her a smile and then head for my office to finish my day.

There's a soft knock on my door and it gently opens. "Ana?"

"Oh, Yes Gail. Come on in." Looking up from my computer screen I see Gail entering her face hidden by flowers.

"Ana, these came for you a minute a go."

"Oh, goodness. They're so pretty." I help her set them on my desk as I plant my face in amongst the roses of assorted colors and greenery." Gosh they smell so good. Wonder who they're from?"

"Do you have to ask? I mean really?" she asks me.

"No. But let me find the card anyway."

I pluck the card from the flora and read it. 'My imagination this afternoon. My body tonight. My heart forever. Later Baby.' I blush as I look up at her. "They're from my husband."

"Do tell. Where do you want them?"

"Why don't you put them up in our room. I want to be able to see them this evening." Gail picks up the arrangement and starts to leave. "Wait. Just a minute." I walk over and pull a rose from the flowers. "I want to keep one."

Gail gives me a smile and walks out with the flowers. Sitting back down I pull the red flower to my face and stroke it over my cheek and under my nose inhaling the scent. It's so beautiful and soft and smells so fragrant. He never leaves anything undone. Whatever his faults are, he is perfect. How can he still affect me this way after so many years? His touch sends electricity through me. My God I even fantasize about him during the day. Does every woman do that about her husband? I hope so. Well. Back to work.

* * *

"Hello wife." I hear and look up to see Christian's face smiling back at me.

"Hello husband. Come in." Getting to my feet I round the corner of my desk as Christian enters and closes the door behind him. I put my arms around his neck as he pulls me to him. "How was your day?" I ask.

"Dreadful."

"Oh? I'm sorry. Why?"

"There is this vixen I couldn't seem to get off of my mind all day. Just thinking about her drove me crazy." He gives me a quick kiss." Didn't get anything done, so I gave up and left early."

"I see. Did you by any chance send this alluring woman flowers?" I tease.

"Yes. I believe I did. I was hoping to sway her into giving it up to me this evening." He murmurs against my neck. "Did it work?"

"Doesn't it always?" I have to giggle. "Sweetheart I'm a given when it comes to you."

"Ahh. I'll never assume you're a given. I'll spend the rest of my life wooing you, Anastasia." As he looks into my eyes, he brushes the hair from my face and strokes my cheeks before brushing his lips against mine. As I open my mouth to him and our tongues explore familiar territory, I melt against him; relaxed against his body.

"I look awful. I wanted to get cleaned up before you got home." I gasp as I break from his lips.

"You look like an oasis in the Sahara. And I feel like I've been wandering the sand dunes for days." He whispers as he glides his lips against my neck leaving a trail of soft kisses behind.

As I look at him his eyes darken and the smile fades from his face. " Fuck I want you now."

I nod. "Yes." He places his palms around my butt cheeks and lifts me, sitting me on the edge of my desk. I urgently grab his tie pulling it loose and slipping it off his neck. His mouth never leaves mine as he strips off his jacket and peels off his shirt. His fingers grab the hem of my blouse and pull it over my head. Before I can take off my bra his face is between my breasts and his tongue is cleaning my skin as his fingers slip into a cup and pull it down exposing a pink erect nipple to him. I gasp a bit as he takes it between his teeth and pulls it into his mouth, sucking and swirling his tongue over it. His hands wrap around to unhook the pink lace undergarment and as it falls away he cups both breasts in his hands and begins to devour them. My head falls back as he pulls me to him and takes most of one breast in his mouth. I can hear the moan that escapes me and feel the urgency as I reach for his belt and quickly unfasten it then undo his trousers and let them pool at his feet.

"Oh fuck, baby I want you." He gasps against my chest still sucking and pulling. My hand snakes through the opening of his boxers and finds him; hard, erect and wanting me. "Oh yeah. That's it," he groans as I begin to squeeze and pull him. My urgency begins to match his as I get off the desk and begin to strip off the rest of my clothing watching him as he does the same. "You're so fucking beautiful, baby." He growls as he removes the last article of his clothing and lunges for me picking me up off the floor. As he does I wrap my legs around him and hang on as he lowers me onto his waiting arousal.

"Aagg." I gasp as I take him and feel him glide over the wet arousal that facilitates his entry.

"You're so wet. What have you been doing all day?" he gasps.  
"Thinking about this." I urgently seal my mouth to his and find his tongue with mine.

"Ohhhh. God Damn, Anastasia." He groans as he raises and lowers me again.

"Floor." I gasp. "Get on the floor." Hanging on to him for dear life and my lips never leaving him, Christian drops to his knees and lowers me to the floor. As he places me on my back he hovers above me then lowers himself to prop on his forearms. His hands then begin to travel my body and he kisses every inch of me before finding my mouth again. His hips begin to roll forward forcing him deeper inside and he cups one of my butt cheeks in his hand as I roll mine to meet him. "Awww, shit." He growls against my ear. "You feel so fucking good. So fucking good."

"So do you. Just fuck me. I need you." I gasp up at him. Grabbing a handful of his hair in my hand I pull his mouth to mine again, trying to devour him.

"Oh, God help me. I want you." He growls.

"You have me. I'm right here, baby." I pant back. I can hear the grunt as the air leaves his chest with every thrust forward. He is propping on his knees as I pull my knees to my chest.

"Oh fuck. Oh fuck. Oh fuck." He growls as he picks up his pace and I roll my hips to meet him.

Gasping I groan,"Oh shit." As he gently begins to circle his thumb over my engorged wet flesh.

"Is that good?" He gasps still thrusting.

'Ye..Yes. Don't stop." I whisper. "Don't…fucking…stop." My fingers dig into his shoulders and I can feel the pulling and tightening in my groin. "I ….I…."

"I know. Let it go. Give it to me," he growls. With that, I can feel the surrender take me. My body takes over and begins to come, just like a rollercoaster dropping over the first dip in the ride. "Ohhhh, Fuuuckkk."I gasp as I look up at him quivering in his arms.

"Mommy?" we both hear at the other side of the door.

"SShhh." He whispers as I quietly ride out the exquisite tremors that wrack my body. Christian wraps me tightly in his arms and again increases his pace.

"It's okay. Just hurry baby." I whisper. As I regain myself. I can see the desperation on his face as he pushes and thrusts wildly racing to his goal. With one final deep thrust, he tenses above me and the veins in his neck bulge as his skin flushes and his face wrinkles in ecstasy. I gently cup my hand over his mouth to stifle him as he trembles and jerks out his release.

"Mama? Can I come in?" I hear Grace rattle the door knob which is thankfully locked.

As he begins to relax I move my hand. "Mom's busy, but I'm almost finished. I'll be out in a minute."

"But Taylor is home. Where is Dad?" I hear Teddy ask.

"He's helping me with something for work, baby. We'll be out in a minute."

I try to stifle a giggle looking up at Christian and giving him a quick kiss. I can feel him slowly shrinking inside me. "Go watch some cartoons. We're almost finished." I pant trying to catch my breath.

"I don't know about you, but I was finished as soon as I heard ,'Mama'." He groans. "That was certainly a mood wrecker." He rolls off and wipes the sweat from his forehead. "It's hard to think, 'Yes, Yes. Harder. Harder.' When all I hear is 'Mama, can I come in?'" "Fucking my wife is the last thing on my mind when I hear my daughter's voice."

I quietly giggle as I roll over and lay my head on his chest. He is heaving trying to catch his breath and strokes my hair. "Well get dressed so we can look like nothing is going on." I pull myself to my feet and look down at the amazing specimen lying before me on the floor. "Do you know how fucking gorgeous you are?" I ask as I step into my panties.

Christian rolls on his side and props on his elbow. "Talk to me like that and I'll jerk you down and fuck your ass again."

"Not with our children out there, you won't." I whisper as Christian keeps grabbing for my panties as I try to pull them up. "Stop that, ass hole. Get up and get dressed."

"Only if you promise to finish later."

"Okay. I promise."

"Promise what?" he teases.

I whisper back. "Okay. I promise to fuck you again later. And maybe we can open the toy box. Just get dressed before the kids burst through the door."

Christian grins. "Deal!" and he jumps to his feet grabbing his clothes and quickly redressing. Finally we resemble our pre-coitus selves. I quickly straighten my hair and then Christian's before we open the door and exit.

"Dad? Where were you?" Teddy hollers as he looks around to see us.

"I was helping your mother with her computer. I think we got it fixed." He tells Teddy as he picks him up and gives him a hug.

"Dad you must have worked hard today. You look tired." Teddy observes.

"Yes, son. I guess you could say I've had a long, hard day."


	63. Chapter 63

_**Fifty Shades…Full Circle**_

_**Chapter 63**_

"Here. Let me get that." Lying beside me on our bed Christian gently removes the blindfold from my eyes and as I adjust to the light he softly presses his lips against mine. "I'll get a bath started." He whispers as his hand roams my skin from my calf up to my cheek. His finger sweetly traces my lower lip and I teasingly grasp it between my teeth feigning a bite. "Can you release me before you start the water?" I ask him. "Please?"

"Well. I suppose I could." He smirks at me. " I mean, I do rather like the look of you in those leather ankle and wrist cuffs." He grins as he presses his lips to mine again. "You don't have to bind me to make me do your bidding, Mr. Grey. All you ever have to do is ask. Remember I'm yours. All yours." I whisper against his soft, warm lips between kisses.

"Fuck. I'm getting hard again." He growls. With my wrists bound I slip my arms over his head and pull him closer. He moves over on top of me and leans on his forearms which are on either side of my head and his hands stroke my hair as he searches my face. "You are so fucking beautiful, Anastasia. Just so fucking beautiful." With that he seals his mouth over mine and his tongue parts my lips as he glides it over my bottom lip begging entrance. The slight moan that escapes me vibrates my chest as I willingly pull my legs up and beg him to come closer. "What, you want it again?" He snorts as his lips break with mine. "Yes." I whisper. "Yes, I do."

"You're insatiable today. First the office, then we played for 2 hours after the kids went to bed and now you're ready to go again."

"I know. I'm a brazen wonton, woman who can't help but crave her husband. But of course if you're tired…"

"I'm never too tired."

"I know. I'm counting on it." Christian gently rolls his hips and once again he is filling my every need. I love the feel of his weight on top of me and the gentle undulation of his abdomen as he rolls his hips thrusting into me. I can feel his ass as the muscles flex and release driving himself in and pulling himself out again. "God you've got a great ass, Grey."

He buries his head in my hair in the crook of my neck and begins to increase his pace and his breathing is labored and ragged against my neck and ear. "Fuck, baby." He growls.

"Yes. Christian. I need you." He moves his hands down and cups my ass lifting it as he becomes more determined and forceful. " Jesus. I'm gonna, come." He growls. "Are you there?"

"Don't worry. Just go ahead. I want to see you." I gasp.

I can feel him suddenly stop and tense. "Oh fucking shit!" His skin flushes, then his face contorts and his neck veins protrude as he catches his breath and holds it. He begins to tremble just before he audibly exhales, "Ohhh. God damn!" As he begins to breathe again he collapses on me with his head on my shoulder. "Oh, God Ana." "I think you're trying to fucking kill me."

Cradling him in my arms I nuzzle my nose in his hair. "No. Not trying to kill you." I kiss his head. " Just stun you a little." I giggle.

"Well you're doing a fine job of it." He gasps to catch his breath. "Consider me stunned and worn out." His hand creeps down and suddenly his fingers creep between my folds and begin to caress me. "No." I grab his arm trying to stop the advance.

"Why not?" he whispers. "You didn't come."

"I know. I don't need to again." He continues to stroke and circle me.

"Then why did you want to go again?" he teases as he breathes against my neck.

"Because I like to watch you. I like to see you when you enjoy yourself." I gasp. "Please. I don't need it."

"But I like to watch you too. Turn about's fair play, Mrs. Grey." I can hear the smile in his voice.

"But," I gasp. "But."

"But what Baby?" "Move your hand." I can feel myself surrendering as he teases and strokes me. Finally I relent and releasing my hold on his arm I let my body relax. "There. That's my good girl." He presses his lips to my neck and gently licks and sucks the skin below my ear.

"Oh, fuck, Christian." I sigh.

"I know. You know you want to come again." He is breathing hard against my neck. "Just relax. Let me watch you. Let me make you come."

I can feel my breathing getting labored and ragged as my belly jumps each time his finger circles and hits the spot. "That's it, baby. Just relax. I'll take care of everything," he is still cooing against my neck. "My God, you're so wet."

"You're making me ….wet. Shit. Christian."

"What baby?" He props up on his elbow and looks down at me before pressing his mouth against mine and finding my tongue. Just as he does I can feel my imminent surrender as it approaches. I dig the fingers of my bound hands into his arm and gasp. "Oh, Christian!" My belly crunches as I begin to tremble and quiver. "Christian!" I gasp again.

"God you're incredible, baby." He buries his head in my neck as his fingers continue to coax every spasm from me.

As my body begins to gain control again, I can't take anymore. "Christian. Enough." "Please baby. Stop." I wriggle my hips and break contact with his fingers. I'm heaving trying to catch my breath "Shit!"

"I love to watch you come. I love to watch you wiggle and writhe and pant and beg." He grins as his hand gently caresses my belly.

"I'd love to watch you unbuckle these cuffs."

Christian throws his head back and laughs, "Okay. Here. Give me your hands." He makes quick work of unfastening the buckles and he rubs my wrist as he removes the leather. I promptly sit up and unbuckle the cuffs adorning my ankles.

He quickly jumps up on all fours, "I'll go start a warm tub." Then gives me a quick peck on my lips.

"Oh, Thank heavens. My muscles are killing me." I sit up and rub my shoulders trying to work the soreness out.

As the water fills the tub and the foam begins to peek over the edge of the tub, I drag myself into the bathroom. "Turn the water off baby." Christian asks. He's already in and leaning back resting his head on the back of the tub with his eyes closed. I comply and turn the faucet off before climbing in with him.

"Oh, Gosh this feels good." I groan as I lean back against him. We sit in silence for a while just relaxing I the hot water; touching, feeling, snuggling. "Christian. I had a talk with the kids today."  
"About what?"

"Actually it was separately, not together."

"Okay. What's up with our kids?" he asks.

"Grace is fine. She just wanted to know how long Tommy was going to be here."

"What did you tell her?"

"The truth. That he would be here a couple of weeks until his mother felt better." "She likes him. She said he plays dolls and tea party with her and Teddy won't. I told her that Tommy was more her age and they probably had more in common."

"So Tommy likes to play dolls and tea party, huh?"

I shrug. "I think he's probably just happy to have anyone to play with. And Grace is having a good time."

"How about the Tedster?"

"He was feeling a little jealous. He doesn't like it when you pay attention to Tommy. I told him he could talk to you about it when you go out on the boat Saturday. But, I explained how much we love him and that we were just trying to be nice to Tommy."

"Okay that's my cue for a father son talk isn't it?"

I look back and smile at him. "Uh huh." "Oh he asked me if I loved you and then he told me that you said you loved me. "

"Now why would I say a thing like that?" he pulls my hair aside and softly kisses my neck.

"I think it's good for the children to know that we love each other. I think it makes them feel safe and secure and it sets a good example for them." "I want them to see what a happy, loving relationship looks like."

"Where would they go to see that?" He continues to nuzzle my neck.

I splash back at him. "You know what I'm talking about. Don't be a jerk." "And I talked to Tommy today too."

"Ummm."

"You know for a three year old he is really pretty open. I mean he really opened up and told me a lot of things." Christian doesn't say anything. "Do you want to know what we talked about?"

"Nope."

"Christian. …."  
"Don't start. I don't want to know any of that shit. I don't care what it is."

"Christian, don't you care at all?" I ask.

"I care. I just don't want to hear it or discuss it."

"But.."

"Ana. Don't fucking push it. He can stay here. We'll look after him until the girl can take him back. But I don't want to hear all that garbage."

"Okay. Maybe later."

"Maybe not later."

I huff as I play with the bubbles that remain in the water. "Oh. I got a call from Paul today. He and Susannah have broken up."

"Hmm. Well can't say I'm surprised."

"Why would you say that?"

"Ana, that poor bastard was sitting at a table with me not knowing that I had fucked his fiancée. In fact I had fuc…"

"What? Fucked everyone at the table?" "That's what you were going to say isn't it?"

"No. I wasn't. I just think that's not a good way to start a marriage with all those secrets."

"Would that be unlike all the secrets you kept from me?"

"I never kept any secrets from you. You knew about my lifestyle before we got married."

"Christian I have had to pull everything out of you. You were never just open with me about everything."

"I was protecting you."

"Protecting me from what? From you."

Silence. "Yes. From me. I was protecting you from me and my fucked up life."

I turn around to face him. "I didn't need to be protected from you."

"Yes you did." He cups my cheek in his palm. " You were so young and naïve and innocent. I was dark and hopelessly lost; looking for something and not knowing what it was. All along I was looking for you. For this."

"But you found me." I give him a smile.

"No you found me. Then you saved me." He pulls me to him and hugs me. "I'm sorry I didn't do a better job of protecting you."

"Christian. You've always taken care of me." I whisper into his ear as he holds me tight.

"But I didn't protect you. I didn't protect Teddy from Elena and I certainly didn't protect you and…..and Sam. I fucked up. I fucked up so bad, baby. I'm sorry. I'm just so fucking sorry."

I think he will crush me he's clinging to me so tightly. "Hey. Baby. What's going on?" I pull back and cup his face in my hands.

"Nothing. It doesn't matter how many fucking companies I buy or how many people work for me, if I can't take care of my family what good am I?"

"Christian. Stop it. You take care of and protect each and every one of us. There isn't anything you wouldn't do for us. We're a family and we take care of each other."

"Ana. I promise I'll never let you down again. I'll never let anything like that happen again. I fucking swear it." He has a pained look on his face.

I nod a little. "I know." Putting my fingers under his chin I lift it and gently press my lips against his. "I know, Sweetheart." I whisper against his mouth as I lean my forehead against his. I stay straddling him and wrapped in each other's arms for several minutes. "Christian?"

"What is it baby?"

"Will you do something for me?"

"Anything. Just ask and it's yours."

"Will you wash my back? The water's getting cold and we need to get out."

He chuckles and releases me. "Sure. Turn around." I quickly comply and Christian soaps up the sponge and scrubs my back."

"Christian? How is Elena's estate coming?"

"What do you mean how is it coming?" He says still soaping me up.

"As far as getting it settled. Is it finished yet?"

"I'm not sure. I turned it over to Thompson. What brought that up?"

"Something Paul said today."

"What would Paul have to do with Elena's estate?"

"He mentioned that he was checking on some business for Susannah in L.A…"

"I thought you said they broke up?"

"I did. I think he's just doing it as a favor to her. Anyway he mentioned that Susannah had given some money to a friend of hers from Seattle that has some salons in L.A. Sort of an investment between friends. He said the friend recently passed away and left her entire estate to someone else and now Susannah wants her money back. Sound familiar?"

"Well. I don't know the particulars on any of it. I guess I could tell Thompson if she asks just giver her what she asks for. If that makes her happy maybe she'll keep her mouth shut."

"So you think Susannah and Elena were in cahoots?"

"It wouldn't surprise me. Water seeks its own level. They had me as a common denominator. I'm sure Susannah will contact Elena's attorney and he can contact Thompson. Whatever she invested with Elena, I'm sure it's not so much that it's worth causing trouble. I

"I'll just have him give her whatever she says she's owed and call it even." "I can't wait for him to get it settled so I can give my mother a check for Coping Together and end the whole fucking mess."

"Okay. I just wanted you to know. I didn't want there to be any surprises."

"I'm sorry you are still having to deal with all this fucking shit."

"I know. It just never seems to end does it?" I look back at him and smile. "Are you ready for me to scrub your back?"

"I would absolutely love for you to scrub my back." I slide around and in behind him. Soaping up the sponge I kiss his shoulders before lathering him up.

* * *

Christian is already in between the sheets on his side of the bed facing the large picture window that looks out over the front of the property. I think he is almost asleep. His breathing is slow and shallow and he looks so sweet; wearing a crisp white T-shirt and his hair falling across his forehead.

I've just slipped into my night shirt and I pull back the covers sliding in on my side. Christian turns over and grabs my head planting a kiss on my lips. "Good night Sweetheart."

I give him a little smile. "Night Baby." I turn to face the opposite direction, turning off my lamp before snuggling under the covers. "Well Shit."

"What is it?" Christian mumbles.

"I forgot to call Dad this evening."

"You can do it tomorrow. Go to sleep."

"I keep forgetting to do it and I need to talk to him."

"About what?" he grumbles.

"I need to find out if he and Myra have set a date yet."

"There's no rush. Call him later this week."

"Christian. There is a rush. Do you know what all we have on our plate right now?"

"No, but I have a feeling you're about to tell me." He growls and turns over to face the ceiling rubbing his face.

"We have Dad and Myra's wedding. Jose and Amelia's wedding. Virginia wants to come for a visit. We have Lorna and Tommy to deal with." I huff at him.

"Ana. You wouldn't have all this crap to deal with if you would quit stirring the shit."

"What? Me stirring the shit?" I sound incredulous.

"Yes, you stirring the shit. It's your father and your housekeeper. Jose is your friend. Virginia is….well she's my grandmother, but you're the reason she's in our lives. And the girl and Tommy go without saying. They are definitely your shit."

"What are you saying?" I sit up in the dark and stare at him.

"I'm saying if you would just stay out of things and mind your own business occasionally, we wouldn't have all these things on our plate. And thank you for putting them on my plate with you," he grumps.

"Christian. You're being a dick."

"No. I am not being a dick. I'm being reasonable. Someone has to be."

"Yes you are. What am I supposed to do? Just sit back and let life pass by without getting involved?"

"Yes. Ana, I like going to work and putting in a good day trying to support my family. Then coming home and spending time with my wife and kids. Eat dinner. Make love to my wife and then get a good night's sleep and get up and do it all over again the next day." "There's a lot to be said for consistency in life."

"You mean you don't want a little excitement in your life?"

Christian punches his pillow and lies back down. "You provide enough excitement for all of us."

"You used to like excitement."

"I used to like a lot of things. Now I like calm and quiet. And I would appreciate it if you could arrange for us to have a little."

"You are turning into an old fart. Besides being a dick."

"Okay. I'm a dick. A big fat, long, veiny, stiff, throbbing dick. Happy?" he grumbles back.

"No. You used to be fun."

"Baby, I'm still fun. I sexted you from work. Sent you flowers. Fucked you on the floor of your office. Played with my children. Tortured and fucked you for two more hours before fucking you one last time. Took a bath and now, I'd really like to get some sleep. I'll be fun again tomorrow when I'm more rested."

"But you used to like for me to be inquisitive and smart and …"

He turns over and grabs me pulling me to him, spooning me while still keeping his eyes closed. "Come here and shut up." He nuzzles his nose in my hair taking a deep breath. " I love you just like you are. Even though you're a stirrer of shit, you're my shit stirrer."

"And you're a still a dick."

"Yes sweetheart, but I'm your dick."

I smile and wiggle my butt up against him. "You're the only dick I'll ever want."

"I'd better be the only dick you'll ever want, 'cause I'm the only dick you're gonna' get."

I wiggle again. "Ana. Stop it."

"What?'

"You know fucking well, what."

"I'm sure I have no idea what you're talking about."

"Ana. Do not, I repeat do not try to get me hard again. I'm tired."

" Thought you were never too tired."

"I lied."

I gently roll my hips just a bit. Suddenly I feel a sting as he slaps my ass. "Ow. Shit."

"I mean it. Stop it."

"Yes sir. I'll be good." I snuggle against him and drift off in his arms.

* * *

I jump awake as I hear a cry over the baby monitor.

"I told you he was gonna' do this Every. Fucking. Night."

"Hush. I'll go see about him."

"Yeah. You do that," he growls.

After prying my eyes open I make my way to the hall and hear the cry coming from Tommy's room. I get to his door and walk in, "Hey. Shhh. Shhh. What's wrong sweetie?"

Poor baby is sitting in the middle of that huge bed crying and sniffling. I walk over turning on his lamp and sit next to him pulling him to my lap. "What's wrong sweetie? Did you have a bad dream?"

" I scarwed. I can find mama," he sniffles.

I hug him and kiss his head, "Sweetie, you know mama is in the hospital. But she's going to get better and then you can see her. It won't be much longer."

"I need mama," he tries not to sniffle and wipes his face with the back of his hand. "I hab to find her."

Reaching over I grab a tissue and wipe his face then place the tissue over his nose. "Blow."

He looks at me perplexed. "Can you blow?" He shakes his head. "Like this." I snort through my nose. Tommy blows through his mouth into the tissue. "No baby. Like this. Through your nose." I snort again. Once again he tries and fails. "Here. Let me just wipe your face." I take the tissue and wipe his nose as best as I can. "Do you need to go potty?" He nods, so I pick him up and take him to the bathroom and help him off with his pullups. They are dry. Yea.

I get him sitting on the potty and hear the tinkle as the stream hits the water. He needs to learn to stand up to pee. Probably no one ever taught him. After getting him dressed and back to bed I lie down beside him and rub his back until he gets back to sleep.

I quietly sneak back and slide back into bed next to Christian.

"What was it this time?" he growls.

"Same thing. He misses his mother." I tell him as I snuggle into my pillow. "Christian?"

I hear him sigh, "What?"

"Tommy doesn't know how to pee."

"W..What do you mean he doesn't know how? You just let the pee flow out. What's to know?"

"I mean he doesn't know about standing up to pee. I guess he never had a man around to show him how to do it. He sits to pee."

"So. Show him."

"Christian I don't have a penis."

"And that's excellent news for both of us."

"Dick." I mutter under my breath.

"See. You do have a penis after all."

"Christian, will you show the boy how to stand up to use the bathroom?"

"No."

"Why not?"

"Because. I just won't. I'm out of the pee instruction business. You do it."

"Okay. I will."

"Just don't tell him it's going to fall off and grow back later." I can feel the bed shake and hear him trying not to laugh.

"Fuck off, Grey."

Still laughing, Christian grabs me and pulls me over then crawls half over me, kissing me. "What are you doing?"

"Well, I'm awake now and all this penis talk has had an effect on me so to speak. I'm going to fuck you now." He grabs my wrists holding them above my head.

"Excuse me? You're going to what?" I ask.

"You heard me. I'm going to fuck you now."

"Don't I have a say in this?"

"No. Spread 'em and let me perform my marital duties."

"Well don't feel obligated." "Marital duties my ass." I mumble.

"Did you say you want it in your ass?"

"No I did not."

"Because I can do that. I can definitely give it to you in your ass."

"No. I don't want it in my ass. Not at 2 a.m. I don't."

"No problem at all. Ass is good for me. I'm all about ass. Ass anytime, anywhere."

"Christian. No. I don't want to do that right now. Maybe later."

"Promise?"

"Yes. Okay? I promise. Later."

"When Later?" he growls against my neck.

"Tomorrow later."

"In the morning?"

"NO. Tomorrow night. We'll do that tomorrow night."

"But it's already tomorrow."

"OKAY. Tonight. We'll do it tonight." " Now unless you want to keep that hard on until tomorrow, shut up and proceed with your marital duties."

He grins down at me with a twinkle in his eye and spreading my thighs with his knee he then falls between them. Rolling his hips he slides inside to begin his job. A soft moan escapes me and Christian softly whispers in my ear, "Getting up with the boy at night is definitely beginning to have advantages."


	64. Chapter 64

_**Fifty Shades…Full Circle**_

_**Chapter 64**_

_**A/N: Several readers asked for a little Tommy, Christian and Ana time. We aim to please.**_

"Here's your coffee."

"Thanks babe." Christian takes a sip and sets his cup on the coffee table in front of the sofa in our bedroom. Sitting down beside him I sip my tea as he bends over to tie his shoes.

Fanning my hand over my mouth, I let out a huge yawn, "Aaawww." "Excuse me I can't wake up this morning."

"Someone didn't get enough sleep last night." Christian grins up at me as he weaves the shoelace into a bow.

"I know. You look chipper this morning." I notice.

"I am. Got a lot to look forward to."

"Really? Got a big day today?" I ask as I take another sip.

"No looking forward to a big evening." He stands up sipping his coffee again and threads his tie through his collar.

"What's up this evening?" I ask.

"Me." He grins again as he ties his Windsor.

"You? Excuse me? Am I missing something?"

"Not yet. Don't you remember you made me a promise?"

"A promise? About what?" I walk over to straighten his tie.

"Remember you promised me a trip to the outback tonight?" he reaches around and squeezes my ass.

"Huh? What? Oh. Surely you wouldn't hold me to a promise made at 2 a.m. I mean I was half asleep."

"Yes I would and I do." He gives me a quick peck on the lips and a smile. "Get your ass ready for a little Mommy Daddy time tonight."

Wrapping my arm around his waist, "When have I not been ready for Mommy Daddy time, Mr. Grey?"

"I've never known it to happen. But just making sure we're on the same page." He wraps his arm around mine and we make our way downstairs for breakfast."

"Good morning Mr. Grey. What would you like for breakfast?" Gail asks. She's always up and in a good mood. Or at least she gives the appearance of a good mood.

"I'll have a couple of poached eggs, English muffin, bacon and fruit if we have any." He mumbles in her direction as he looks over the front page of the paper.

"Very good. Mrs. Grey? How about you?" She asks.

"Oh, just give me the same. Except I'll have one egg. What's Tommy doing up so early?" I ask as I notice him wandering through the kitchen in his pajamas.

"I needed to get him up and feed him so I can get his medicine down him this morning. It always goes better with food."

"Oh, Okay. He can keep Christian and me company at the breakfast table." Christian is already seated at the table reading the morning paper as I walk in carrying Tommy and put him in his booster seat.

"There you go mister. Are you hungry?" I ask Tommy.

He nods, "Uh, huh."

"What are you going to have to eat?"

"Ce –we- al."

"Cereal? Is that all? Don't you want an egg and some bacon and toast?"

"I don wike a egg. I wike ce- we- al."

"Would you like to try an egg?"

"Ana. He wants cereal." Christian mutters not taking his eyes off of the paper.

"Okay. I just thought a hot breakfast might be better for him with those antibiotics on his stomach. Excuse me for trying."

I take my place at the table and sip on my tea as Gail prepares breakfast.

"What you doin'?" Tommy looks over at Christian.

Christian doesn't budge. "I thaid what you doin'?" Tommy asks louder.

"Christian?" I peer over at my husband sitting at the other side of the table.

"What?" he looks up from the paper.

"Tommy asked you a question."

"Oh." He looks at Tommy. "What did you say?"

"I thaid, what you doin?" Tommy fidgets with his hands under the table.

"I'm reading the paper." Christian tells him.

"Oh." "Why?" Tommy asks.

"To see what happened in the world over night." Christian explains.

"Oh." "What happed?" Tommy asks.

Christian looks over at him again. "Do you really want to know?"

Tommy nods.

"Well, the market is down …again. There is a war in the Middle East….still. And locally, it looks like work on the I5 is going to run another year. And the forcast….Rain. Who would have guessed?"

"Oh. Ukay." "Can I weed a paper too?" he asks.

Christian tries not to grin. "Would you like to see the cartoons?"

"Uh, huh." Tommy nods.

Christian gives him a sideways glare, but then finds the cartoon page and separates it handing it to Tommy. "Knock yourself out, Sport."

Tommy takes the huge sheet and tries to bring it under control without much success, so I help him fold it to a manageable size for a three year old. Tommy intently looks over the drawings and talks to himself making up a story for the pictures. I can't help but smile as I watch him pretend read the morning paper. Christian keeps glancing over at him trying to watch Tommy's effort, without being noticed.

"Here we go." Gail sets a plate in front of me and then one in front of Christian. "Can I get anyone any juice?"

"I'd love some. Orange, please." I ask as I butter my warm muffin. "Okay. I'll be right back with it and with your cereal Tommy."

I hand Tommy a piece of bacon. "Do you want to try some bacon? It's good."

Tommy looks skeptical, but takes the crispy strip and takes a bite.

"Good?" I ask as he chews. And he gives me a big nod. "I wike ce-we-al too."

Gail arrives back with Tommy's cereal and a glass of milk. She prepares his cereal putting some milk on it and Tommy dives in. She freshens Christian's coffee before walking back to the kitchen.

"Anything big going on at work today?" I ask.

"Not really. I'm hoping for a relatively quiet day. I need to get that document from legal for 'her' to sign." He nods in Tommy's direction. "And I need to let Thompson know about Susannah. How about you?"

Before I can answer. "And don't forget to call Ray today."

"Oh. Thanks I won't. I hope the pool is finished this week. We can hardly have a wedding in the back yard with that hole in the ground."

"If it doesn't stop raining, Elliott will never get it finished."

"If it doesn't stop raining, we can't have a wedding in the back yard anyway." I sip my juice. "It's supposed to be nice tomorrow. You and Teddy should have a nice day on the water."

"Yep. I'm actually looking forward to it. I don't think we've ever been out just the two of us."

"Christian, he is so looking forward to it. Do you want me to have Gail send a lunch with you?"

"Ummm. No. I think we'll just stop somewhere and eat. Don't forget to send sunscreen with him."

"There should be some already on the boat, but I'll send some just in case."

""You go on da boat?" Tommy asks slurping his cereal.

"Yes. Christian and Teddy are going out on a boat tomorrow." I explain.

"I go on da boat?"

"Maybe sometime, sweetheart. But not tomorrow. Christian is just taking Teddy tomorrow." I try to explain.

"Ukay." He picks up the 'O's he has spilled and puts them in his mouth with his fingers. "I go on da boat tome time?" He looks over at Christian.

"Maybe later we can all go on the boat together. Now finish your cereal."

"Ukay." He keeps shoving the cereal in his mouth. "I neba seed a weel boat."

"Well, we can show you one later on. Would you like that?" I ask.

He nods, "Uh, huh. I hab more?" he points to my plate.

"More what?" I ask.

"More dat."

"Bacon? Do you want some bacon?"

He nods. "Okay. Here you go." I hand him a piece and he devours it. "I swear. You are a bottomless pit Tommy Blakely."

"Good to see someone likes to eat." Christian mumbles.

* * *

"Hi Dad." I smile into the phone as I hear Ray's voice.

"Annie girl. What's up?"

"Not much. I just haven't talked to you lately and I …well…I just thought I'd call and see how things are going."

"Good. They're going good. How's my grandkids?"

"They're fine. Teddy's enjoying summer vacation. Grace is just being Grace."

"Good. And that husband? How's he doing?"

"Christian is fine. Working hard as usual."

"Getting' richer by the minute, I suppose."

I snort, "Yeah. I suppose you could say that." "Listen Dad. I was wondering about you and Myra."

"What about me and Myra?"

"Have you set a date yet? I mean I know we talked about having the wedding here and I was thinking, those things take some planning and I wanted….."

"I see. Well we talked about it and I think we want to do it ourselves, you know? I mean we want all of you to come. I just think Myra feels a little self- conscious about having it there. You know since she works there and all."

"Oh, Dad. I'm sorry. We would love to do it for you. Are you sure?"

"Yeah, baby. I think we will just have something simple and quick."

"Quick? She isn't pregnant is she, Dad?" I have to laugh.

"Good God, don't talk like that. That isn't the…."

"Dad. Dad I was just kidding. I'm sorry. I know better than that. I shouldn't have kidded you."

"Oh, no that's okay kiddo. It just took me by surprise for a second. I just mean we sort of want to get on with it you know. Actually we were planning on the seventeenth of next month."

"Dad, that's so quick."

"I know. Can you make it?"

"Well of course we can make it. Where will it be?"

"I wanted to go to the courthouse, but Myra wants a little more than that, so we decided on this little church she went to when she was kid. Won't be fancy, just family. Wear what you want to."

"Okay. Where are you going on a honeymoon?"

"Home."

"Home?" "You mean back to your house?"

"That's what we planned."

"Dad. You should take her somewhere nice. Let Christian and I do that for you…please?"

"But we don't need all that, baby."

"I know that, but at least for a day or two. Myra deserves some sort of honeymoon. Please. Let us do it. I promise it won't be over the top. Just a getaway for a few days."

"Well….okay I guess. But nothing fancy schmancy. Hear me?"

"Yes. I hear you. Well. I'm sorry you won't be having it here, but I want you to be happy and do what you want."

"Thanks Sweetie. We just want to get it over with and get on with it. Hey how's Jack?"

"Jack is good. He went to the groomer yesterday. He smells good."

"Groomer, huh? Dog beauty shop."

"Dad. He just needed a bath and that sort of thing. He's none the worse for the wear. If he's going to sleep in the bed, I want him smelling good."

"Okay. Okay."

"Well I won't keep you. I need to get back to work. I wanted to check in on you and find out about this wedding."

"Okay, Annie. Well kiss my grandkids and tell Christian I said 'hello'."

"I will Dad. Take care and keep me apprised of the wedding plans."

"I will baby. See you later."

"Bye Daddy."

Well, as much as I hate that, it's one less thing I have to deal with. Oh well. I grab a manuscript and pick up where I left off yesterday. Damn, I can't seem to read more than a few sentences without nodding off. I could use a nap after being up half the night last night. I continue to forge my way through this thing. I'm beginning to wonder if it's my lack of sleep or just the lack of interesting reading material.

I grab at my phone as I hear it ring. "Anastasia Grey."

"Hello, Anastasia Grey."

I put my manuscript down at the sound of the voice on the other end. "Hello, Mr. Grey. To what do I owe the honor of this call?"

"I have some business information that I thought you might be interested in."

"Oh, really? I'm listening."

"Well, I heard from Flynn. They moved the girl to rehab today. She is officially a part of the rehabilitation program."

"That's good news. How is she doing?"

"Fine I guess. Someone from legal is going over this afternoon to get her to sign the papers letting us take care of the boy while she's 'in'."

"Christian I want to go too."

"Why? Just let legal handle this. All I want is something acknowledging that she agrees for us to keep the boy and provide for his care while she is in rehab."

"Christian, I want to explain to her that we are just looking after him for a while. I don't want your army of lawyers going over and intimidating her. She's fragile enough as it is right now."

"Ana, no one is going to intimidate her and I hardly call Mancuso an army. It's just to protect us. I don't want her coming back later trying to get money saying that we kept her kid from her."

"I still want to go with him."

"Mancuso is a her. I thought a woman would be better."

"Yes. I agree. That's a good idea. But I want to talk to her."

"Ana. She can't have visitors yet. It took Flynn, my legal team and me to convince them I needed to get this legal document signed. They aren't going to let you see her."

"I still want to try."

"Ana, do you remember our discussion about stirring the shit?"

"Yes. And I don't care. I'm going with Mancuso. What's her first name anyway?"

"I have no idea. Helen, I believe….maybe. I always call her Mancuso."

"What time is she going over?"

"After lunch sometime, I think."

"Tell her to wait. I'm going with her."

"You just never fucking stop. Whatever. I'll have Andrea let legal know have her wait for you."

"Great. I'll be there in an hour."

After leaving the car with the valet I hit the elevators making my way to the twentieth floor and Christian Grey. As I step on the elevator car I am met by a lone traveler. A beautiful petite blonde in a beige linen suit. I give her a smile as I enter the code for the administrative floor.

"Going to twenty?" she asks.

"Yes." I give her a smile. "You?"

"Me too. I already put in the code."

"Oh. Okay." I give her a smile. "Have you worked here long?" I ask her.

"No. As a matter of fact I just started this week. Two days ago actually."

"Oh, well, I'm Anastasia." I extend my hand. "Welcome."

"Thank you." She grips my hand. "Allison Hancock. I just finished my MBA at Columbia. I'm so excited to be here. We studied Mr. Grey and I can't believe I'm actually here working for him."

"Well, I'm sure they are glad to have you."

"Where do you work?" She asks.

"Me? Oh, I'm in publishing? I don't work for…"

"Well. Here we are. It was nice meeting you Anastasia." She gives me a smile. "Maybe we can get together for lunch one day?"

"Yes. Perhaps. Good luck." I tell her not wishing to burst her bubble. She smiles at Andrea and walks off down the hall.

"Hi, Andrea."

"Hi Mrs. Grey. Mr. Grey is in his office."

"Andrea, who was that?" I ask.

"Oh, Allison? She just started. Just got some hotshot degree from Columbia and is working in public relations. Gwen just hired her. Seems nice enough, though. You can go on in."

"Okay. Thanks." Walking the short distance to Christian's office I open the door and peer around the corner. As usual Christian is on the phone talking while looking over some papers on his desk. He motions for me to come in.

"Okay." Well, why not?" "Email the reports to me. I want to look them over." "Has legal seen them yet?" "Why not?" "Get 'em to me within the hour and stay on top of the fuckers." "I don't want to have to make a trip but I will if needed." Christian hangs up and puts the phone down.

"Hey sweetheart." He gets up and walks around his desk.

"Hey yourself." I smile at him as we meet each other half way across his office. "Where are you going?" I ask.

"Nowhere if I can help it." He gives me a kiss and puts his arm around my waist leading me to the white leather sofa and sitting us both down.

"Oh, I thought you said you might have to go somewhere."

"I might. Hopefully we can take care of things from here. Now. Why do you insist on going to the facility with Mancuso. She is perfectly capable of getting the document signed and notarized."

"I just don't want Lorna to think we are trying to take Tommy away."

"Ana, why would she even begin to think that?"

"Well, we told her Tommy could stay with her and now we are saying that he can't. The doctor caring for him is your mother and she is suggesting Tommy stay with us. You are having her sign legal documents that have been drawn up by your legal staff and taken over there by your attorney. I don't want her to think we are railroading her."

"Railroading her to what? Allowing us to keep a child we don't want to keep?"

"She might see it differently. I just want to make sure she understands that it is just temporary. That signing the documents is a legal way of allowing Tommy to stay with us until she can take care of him again. So the state or anyone else can't come take him away while she's in rehab."

"That's exactly what the papers say, Ana. Mancuso will explain it all to her."

"I just want to make sure. She knows me. Mancuso is a stranger." I try to explain.

"Okay. Fuck. There's no talking you out of anything once you set your mind to it."

I trail my finger down his cheek. "Nope. That's what Kate said when I insisted on marrying you."

"Kate didn't want you to marry me?" he asks looking over at me.

"Christian. Do you even have to ask that question?"

"Fuck. I knew there was a reason I hated her."

"You don't hate Kate and she doesn't hate you. You two just have a friendly grudge. It just happens to have been going on for 8 years."

"I'm glad you didn't listen to her." He grins at me turning my chin towards him.

"Sweetheart, at the time you were all I could see or hear." He presses his lips against mine and gently glides them over my lips. "You're still pretty much all I can see or hear."

"Pretty much?" he whispers.

"Pretty much." I nod.

"Wait until tonight. You won't be able to see or hear anything but me." He kiss me again. "I'll be all you can think about." He cups my head and aggressively takes my mouth.

I jump when we hear a knock. Christian continues to devour my mouth. "Umph. Christian. Someone is knocking." I try to break away.

"Let 'em fucking knock. No one comes in here unless they're invited." He grumbles.

"Sweetheart, maybe it's the attorney. Wasn't she supposed to meet me here?"

"Okay. Okay." He straightens himself. "Come in."

An attractive redhead opens the door and walks in. She is in a navy suit with heels and only pearl studs for jewelry, a shoulder bag and a leather briefcase. "Mr. Grey. Helen Mancuso. I was told Mrs. Grey wanted to meet me here and accompany me to see Ms. Blakely."

Christian stands and extends his hand to help me from the sofa. "Yes. Mancuso, this is my wife Mrs. Grey." I extend my hand and she shakes it. "Ms. Blakely is sort of pet project of Mrs. Grey's. She would like to accompany you to talk to her when you have her sign the documents."

"Very well. That's a good idea. I think Ms. Blakely will be more approachable if she sees someone she knows."

"Well. I'll wait in the lobby for you Mrs. Grey. Whenever you're ready."

"No need. I'm ready. I'll walk down with you." I tell her as she turns to leave.

"I'll see you later Christian." I politely tell my husband in front of his employee.

Christian leans in and chastely kisses my cheek. "I won't be late. See you at home."

Helen and I walk to the elevator and get on facing the front as the doors close. "So you're Mrs. Grey?"


	65. Chapter 65

_**Fifty Shades…Full Circle**_

_**Chapter 65**_

Helen and I walk to the elevator and get on facing the front as the doors close. "So you're Mrs. Grey?"

Well that was certainly an odd comment. "Yes. I believe I am."

"I'm sorry. That was a terrible way to put that." She apologizes.

"That's…. okay." I say skeptically.

"What I mean is…well….you are almost a legend around here. I'm just glad to finally meet you," she tries to dig herself out.

"A legend?"

"Yes. Actually. You are the woman who not only caught but is able to keep Mr. Grey." She shakes her head. "I'm sorry. This is coming out all wrong. I'm really much better in a courtroom."

"I hope so." I give her a half smile.

"I mean you have to know what a catch he is. He's not only wealthy and a financial genius, but he is amazingly gorgeous and the man oozes sex appeal."

"Yes. I wake up next to him every morning. I'm aware of what he looks like. I…"

"There isn't a day that goes by that someone isn't throwing herself at him. I mean all the girls in the office know better. ' Mr. Grey doesn't stray.' That's sort of the unofficial warning all the new girls get. In fact not long ago someone was shown the door for trying. But women that he has business dealings with; they just put themselves out there. But he doesn't see them."

"Well I…."

"You are the woman who caught and is able to keep Christian Grey. And the way you handled all that mess last year. The Patterson shooting and then the Columbia incident. You stepped up to the plate and just took it in stride. How do you do it?"

We glide to a halt and the doors slide open. Exiting the elevator car, we make our way to the lobby door and out to the waiting SUV and Taylor continuing our conversation on the way. "As I was trying to say, I barely discuss my relationship with my husband with close friends, so it would be entirely inappropriate to discuss with employees. I don't mean to be rude. It just wouldn't be proper. I will say that I didn't catch him and he didn't catch me. We found each other. My husband and I not only love each other very much, but have a tremendous amount of respect for one another. It's because of that love and respect that we have a solid relationship. It's that simple. Subject closed Ms. Mancuso. And I sincerely hope that Mr. Grey's private life is not a subject for discussion by his employees."

We slide into the back seat and I raise the privacy window as Taylor pulls out into traffic.

"I'm sorry. I know I overstepped. I've just wanted to meet you for so long. Please don't take it the wrong way."

"I won't. I just think it's better if we concentrate on Lorna Blakely."

"So, she's a pet project of yours?"

"I wouldn't call her that. My husband has a way of trying to tie things up in a neat little package sometimes. He doesn't like messes." I try to explain. "I ran into Ms. Blakely and her son while on a business trip to Sacramento. I realized that they needed help and I wanted to give it to them. That's all."

"Well, it's very noble of you. Not everyone would go out of their way for a drug addict and her son."

"A drug addict is a person too. Look, by helping Lorna, we're helping her son as well. If Lorna can get clean and make a good life for herself she can take care of her son. We just want to help her to do that."

"It's incredible to see someone of Mr. Grey's stature do something on such a personal level to help a virtual stranger. I mean we all know about his philanthropic gestures and his foundations, but to do it one on one like this. More people should know about it."

"Absolutely not. This is something very personal for our family and I….we would appreciate it if it remained that way. This goes no further. Are we on the same page?"

"Yes, Mrs. Grey. Look I know I've made a bad impression and that's just the opposite of what I wanted to do. As one woman to another, I just wanted you to know how much I admire you."

"I appreciate that. And I understand. I've dug a few holes for myself over the years. I've found the less you say the, faster that hole fills in."

"Yes, ma'am." She gives me a grin and a nod.

"Now. May I see the documents that we're asking Ms. Blakely to sign?" I ask.

"Oh. Of course." She digs through her brown leather briefcase to retrieve the documents and hands them to me.

After reading them I hand them back. "That looks good. I'm sure they say what they need to say in order to protect everyone, including Ms. Blakely and her son."

"Yes ma'am. Mr. Grey was very specific regarding the purpose for the documents. They will look out for the best interest of everyone concerned."

"I hope they will allow me to see her today. I want to explain that we aren't trying to pull anything over on her. I want her to understand that we are looking out for her and for Tommy with all of this."

"I think we should just explain the situation and that should take care of everything. Mr. Grey and Mr. Thompson made sure it was all taken care of."

"Good. I hope so."

It doesn't take long for us to arrive at the facility and we all enter the reception area after parking the SUV. At reception we explain who we are and Helen and I are allowed to enter the visitation room while Taylor waits in the lobby. I look over and sitting in a chair is someone who looks like Lorna Blakely. "Lorna?" I tentatively ask.

"Oh, hey. Mrs. Grey." She looks up at me. She looks frail but clean and better somehow. Her hair is clean and in a side braid and her clothes are clean. She is still in jeans and is wearing a clean T-shirt and athletic shoes. Her eyes are clear and she has a better look about her. Just somehow healthier.

"How are you sweetheart?" I give her a gentle hug.

"Okay, I guess. I'm tired. I'm not sleeping good. Been through a lot."

"You look good Lorna." I try to give her a smile. "I know it's been rough, but that part is behind you." I sit down on the sofa next to the chair and Helen sits next to me.

"Yep. I hope so. Don't really want to go through that again." "How's Tommy?"

"He's great, sweetie. They wouldn't let him stay here until you got out of detox, so we took him home to stay with us. When I took him to the doctor, she advised against putting him with all the other children here because of him just getting out of the hospital and being so sick. He still needs looking after with his medications and breathing treatments. She didn't think his immune system was strong enough to fight off anything they might bring in. We still have him at home with us, Lorna."

"Yeah. They told me all that. I appreciate what you done for him. I mean it must be a pain to have to take in another kid."

"Lorna, he's no trouble. He has fit right in with our two children. In fact he's the same age as our daughter. They are getting along great."

"Good. I don't want him getting' sick again. I'm glad he's in a good place right now. I miss him though. I can't wait to see him."

"As soon as they say it's okay we'll have him over here to see you. He misses you so much. He asks for you all the time." I try to explain. "I just told him you were sick and in the hospital like he was. He seems to understand that."

"They said I can probably see him in about 2 weeks."

"Good. Look Lorna. I want to tell you why we are here. Sweetheart, I don't know how to explain this, but Mr. Grey and I think it would be best if we had some legal papers saying that it's your wish for Tommy to stay with us until you can take care of him or he's well enough to come stay here at the center. We don't want anyone to be able to take him, for instance the state. I know the plan was for him to be here, but since he can't be, we don't want the state to come to try to take him since you are not able to care for him right now. It would be best if we had something legal that says that this is what you want."

"No. No. Me either. I think it's good that he's with you. I trust you. I know you'll take care of him for me." She shifts in her chair. "Sure. I'll sign whatever you need."

"This is Ms. Mancuso. She is an attorney who has drawn up the papers."

Lorna nods at her. "Hi."

"Well, Ms. Blakely.."

"Call me Lorna. I like that better."

"Very well. Lorna. Here are the papers. I'd like you to look over them and I'll be glad to answer any questions that you might have."

"I got no questions. I doubt I could understand what it says anyhow. You got a pen?"

"Lorna, I'd feel better if you knew what you were signing." I tell her. "If you don't want to read them, then let Helen explain them to you."

"Okay. Whatever."

"Well. They aren't really too detailed. Basically is just states that it is your wish that your son, Tommy remains in the custody of Mr. and Mrs. Grey until such time as you request his return. That can be when you finish rehab or when you want him to come stay here at the facility with you. It can be tomorrow if you want it to. But this just gives them legal right to care for him and make decisions until you are able to."

"Lorna, we won't make any decisions without consulting you. It just lets us take him to the doctor or the dentist or.."

"He ain't never been to a dentist." She shakes her head.

"Well. We will make sure that he gets all the care he needs."

"I know you will. Anyone that would pay for him to be in the hospital….." she starts to cry.

"Oh, Lorna, sweetie, everything is going to be okay." I slide over to hug her. "You and Tommy are going to get through this. You have so much to look forward to. Please don't give up. You're doing this for both of you." I just hold her for a minute. "I know this is so tough. I can't even imagine what you're going through. You're so brave to do this. I'm just so proud of you."

"I'm gonna' try." She wipes her nose and face. "I know I need to do this." She takes a deep breath and exhales. "Okay. Can I have those papers?"

Helen motions for the caregiver to come over to witness Lorna signing the paperwork. Lorna takes the pen and scribbles her name and hands the pen and documents back to Helen. "There. Anything else?"

"No. I think that will suffice." Helen says as she tucks the papers back into her briefcase after the caregiver witnesses them. "I'll make sure a copy of these reaches your file here by tomorrow."

"Whatever. I'm sure everything is okay." Lorna assures her.

"Well, I don't think they want us to stay too long. Do you need anything? Can we bring you anything or have anything sent over?"

"Naw. I'm okay. I'm just tired. They say that's expected and I'll start to feel better when I start eatin' and sleepin' better. I hope it's soon."

"I know you do. Will you have them get in touch with us if you need anything or just to ask about Tommy?"

She nods. "Yeah. I will."

"Okay. Well I guess we better go. I think we've already overstayed our welcome." I stand up to leave. Before I walk away, I lean over and kiss her head. "Take care sweetie. And don't worry about anything. Just concentrate on getting well." I whisper to her.

Helen and I walk back out to reception and meet Taylor who is sitting in a metal chair thumbing through a magazine. He jumps up. "Everything go okay?"

"Yes. I think so. I think we are ready to head back to the office."

The three of us get in the SUV and head back to Grey House. As we get on the elevator Helen asks me to punch the button for the 11th floor. "Aren't you going to 20?" I ask.

"No. I'll be getting off at legal. I need to get these papers taken care of and get a copy sent over for Lorna."

"Well. It's been nice meeting you Helen. And thank you for helping with this."

"It's been my pleasure Mrs. Grey. And I hope you'll forgive my awkwardness earlier. I really was very excited to meet you."

"I understand. No problem. And our discussion stays between us. Right?"

"Yes, ma'am. Thank you." The door opens on eleven and Helen gets off as I continue up to twenty. The elevator car comes to rest on the top floor of Grey House and I get off to see Andrea still at her desk tapping away on her keyboard.

"Mrs. Grey. You're back. How did it go?" she smiles up at me and stopping her tapping.

"Fine. She was cooperative. Is Mr. Grey busy?"

"Actually, he is. He's in a meeting right now, but it should be over with shortly. I hope."

"Oh, okay. Well tell him I'll see him at home would you?" I ask.

"Um. He asked me to ask you to wait for him. He said he'd be ready to leave when this was over."

"Oh, well. You said it shouldn't be much longer?"

"Right. They've been in there a couple of hours. I can't imagine that it will be much longer."

"Okay. Well. I guess I'll just have a seat and wait a bit then."

"Can I get you anything?"

"Actually I could use some tea."

"Okay. Go have a seat and I'll have it right out." I walk over and have a seat in the waiting area that faces the large glass wall. It faces the ocean and the view is beautiful from there. Or it would be if it weren't raining. I can still see the Pacific, it's just gray and dull.

"Here you go." Andrea hands me a hot cup with a tea bag on the side.

"Thank you. Oh, Andrea? How is Olivia? Mr. Grey mentioned that she brought the baby in not long ago."

"Yes. She did. He's just precious, but then Olivia and her husband are a good looking couple."

"Yeah I remember him from the wedding. I guess they're over the moon with the baby."

"She's pretty fond of him. She comes in and we have lunch occasionally. I miss having her around."

"How is Gwen doing?" I ask as Andrea sits down in a chair across from me.

"Fine. I like her and she's really good."

"How about Allison?" I take another sip of hot tea.

"Well, she's only been here a couple of days and most of that has been spent in HR getting indoctrinated and signing papers. She's only been up here a couple of hours each day, so I really don't know her. She seems to be…..rather perky."

"So I noticed. I don't think she knew who I was, which is okay. I certainly don't expect everyone to know me on sight. It was just funny. She introduced herself and asked me to have lunch one day." I have to smile.

"Oh dear. I'm sure Gwen will make sure she knows who you are shortly. I mean she is going to work in PR. Knowing who you represent should be essential."

"She'll be fine I'm sure." I sip again. "Andrea? Have you ever heard the phrase,"Mr. Grey don't stray?" I tentatively ask.

"What? Where did you hear that?" she asks.

"Um. I just overheard it in the building. I was wondering..."

"Well I'm sorry you heard that. It's just sort of a saying the girls around here have. It started ages ago. Anytime a new girl starts, the first time she sees him she's usually pretty smitten. That's what she's told. Don't even think about it 'cause, 'Mr. Grey don't stray.' This is a work place and there shouldn't be those types of conversations happening, but…."

"I know. I'm well aware of the effect my husband has on women. It's good to know he has that sort of reputation."

She nods and smirks. "Well he does. You know me, I'm a dinosaur. I've worked here since the beginning of time. He's always been oblivious to women. Except the day you came. That's the only time I've ever seen him react to a woman. He's always been like that. Doesn't waste his time on anything he's not interested in."

"Hmm. You're right. So Andrea. What about you? Are you seeing someone special?"

"Not really. I just got out of a relationship earlier this year. We dated a couple of years, but didn't work out in the end." She shrugs.

"I'm sorry."

"That's okay. Things either work or they don't."

"You're right. Christian would be lost if you left anyway."

"We've been together a long time. I like working for him."

"You mean he doesn't intimidate you?"

"Naw. He did when I first started. I went home crying pretty much every night. I just figured if I wanted to work for him I had to let it roll off. I've even stood up to him once or twice. Scared the shit out of me, but it's worked out."

"ANDREA! Where are you?" We hear.

"That would be Mr. Grey." Andrea quickly gets up and runs over to see Christian exiting his office with his visitors. "Right here Mr. Grey. Can I help you."

"Yes. Call for the car to take Ms. Whitson and her team back to their hotel and get these papers to legal. I've made the revisions we want in red. Have them ready to sign by ten Monday morning." Christian turns to the attractive middle aged brunette in a pale yellow suit. "Deanne. It's been a pleasure. I look forward to seeing you Monday morning and getting things finalized. I apologize for not being available in the morning, but I have a prior engagement."

"Christian are you sure I can't talk you into dinner this evening?" She asks almost seductively.

"Thank you Deanne, but my wife and I have plans this evening. I'll look forward to seeing you first thing Monday." He shakes her hand. "Stewart, Gannon. Have a good evening." He shakes hands with the men accompanying the brunette.

Andrea calls for their car and shows them to the elevator making sure they have everything they need. Christian advises the two men from finance that flank him, to review the papers before the meeting Monday morning. God I love to watch him in his element. He is so in control and confident. He is sexy. I can't help but stare and watch from the sofa as he does what he does. Andrea returns to her desk. "Mr. Grey I need your signature on these, please." She hands him a stack of letters that he bends over to sign. "And Mrs. Grey is waiting for you."

He looks up at her. "She is? Where?" Andrea nods to the sofa and I smile at him as he makes eye contact with me. "Put these on my desk. I'll finish signing them later." He tells her. Christian walks over to the sofa and sits down next to me and giving me a kiss on my cheek.

"So how did it go?" he asks.

"Fine."

"Good. I want to hear about it. Let me go close up my desk and we'll head home. Thanks for waiting on me."

Christian stands up and extends his hand to me then we walk to his office. On the way he asks Andrea to have my car brought around. I watch as he turns off his computer and clears his desk for the day. "What?" he asks me as I watch his every move.

"Nothing. I just like watching you."

"I like you watching me." he gives me his Christian grin with a twinkle in his eye as he puts his laptop in his briefcase and locks his desk. He walks over and puts his arm around my waist as we head out the door and toward the elevator. "Have a good weekend, Andrea. You know how to reach me if anything comes up." He tells his executive administrative assistant.

"Yes. Thanks Andrea." I tell her.

"Good night. It was good to see you again Mrs. Grey and I'll see you Monday morning Mr. Grey."

"Christian, who was that woman?" I ask him.

"What woman?" he asks.

"Christian. The one who just left your office. The brunette in the yellow suit."

"Oh, Deanne? She is from Adderton Industries. We are working on a contract to obtain parts for the shipyard. She is over their finance department. We are hammering out the financials of the contract."

"Oh. She seemed to show an interest in you."

"Yeah well. You saw how far it got her. She can fucking show an interest in me all day long just as long as I get the price I want on those contracts."

"Do women hit on you a lot? "I ask.

"Not that I've noticed. Why?" Andrea's right; he is oblivious.

"I just wondered. I would assume that you would be off limits to the women here in the office. I just wondered if many of the women you have business dealings with come on to you."

He shrugs. "I guess. Sometimes. I'm not in the market for a girlfriend. I have a wife. Remember?"

"Oh I remember. I just wanted to make sure you did."

The elevator arrives and we get in the car. "Ana? What's up? It's not like you to question that."

"I'm not really questioning it. The subject just sort of came up today and I wondered if many of the women you deal with try to hit on you. That's all."

"Why in the fuck would that come up?" he asks.

"Long story. We can talk about it later." I tell him.

"We have a long ride home. I'm all ears." We exit the elevator and walk out the door to my waiting R8. Christian takes the keys from his valet and we get in the car. "Looks like the weather has cleared up." Christian puts the top down and puts on his sunglasses before pulling out into traffic, with Taylor hot on our heels in the SUV. "You know Taylor will have a fit about you putting the top down." I remind him.

"Fuck him. That's why I bought a convertible."

"I thought you bought it because I asked for it." I give him a sideways glare and grin.

"I did. Doesn't mean I don't like driving it." We pull out of traffic and on to the interstate and he floors it. I have to giggle as the wind blows our hair and Christian is having a ball weaving through traffic. He looks like a kid driving his dad's car.

"Christian! Be careful." I laugh.

"Aww, come on Mrs. Grey. Live a little." He looks over and grins.

"I am living. I just want to get home to our kids in one piece."

"Okay." The car begins to slow. "Now, tell me what brought about all this talk of women hitting on me?"


	66. Chapter 66

_**Fifty Shades…Full Circle**_

_**Chapter 66**_

Christian hits the garage door opener in the car and the door glides up just in time for him to pull the car into its spot without even slowing up.

"Well that was fun." I smile over at him as he pulls the keys from the ignition and lets the garage door glide back down into place. Christian leans over and puts his arm around my shoulders. "Wanna' make out before we go in?" he asks just before leaning his head over and pressing his lips against mine. Reaching up I pull his sunglasses from his face and drop them in the console. My mouth still dancing over his, I wrap my arms around his neck and secure my hold on him. "Mmmm. You feel good." He murmurs against my mouth as his hand winds its way up my skirt; his fingers coming to rest on the silk crotch of my beige panties.

"Uh uh. Christian!" I try to clench my thighs together. His hand is firmly ensconced on my crotch and his fingers are gliding over the silk fabric. "Uh uh, what?" he growls.

"Sweetheart, we're in the garage. Anyone could come out here any moment." I just want to relax and let him continue, but I know the kids probably heard the car.

"You want me to stop?" he whispers against my neck as his fingers find the top of my panties and slip below gliding into wetness between my thighs. "Fuck. Your wet." In a brief instant his fingers find the spot and begin to put pressure on it before circling and caressing it. "Still want me to stop?" he whispers between kisses on my neck.

"No. But.."

"But what?"

"But the car's too small. We can't do this in the car."

"I seem to remember fucking you in a car very much like this one in a parking lot a few years ago." I am melting as he kisses below my ear. "So we know it can be done."

My belly jumps every time he caresses between my thighs and hits the sensitive spot. Without missing a beat his fingers slide inside and thrust in and out as his thumb continues to circle me.

Christian moves out of his seat. "Here sit up." He tells me and I try to balance on my feet and hold myself up as he takes his place in my seat underneath me. Having the top down makes this a bit easier. I can hear his zipper and look behind ,me to see him gently stroking his now free erection. Frantically working my panties down my legs I get them off of my feet and hold on to the door with one hand and the console with the other as he pulls my skirt up to my waist. His hand grips my hip and guides me down, while he positions his erection under me with the other. "Oh, fuck." He gasps as I slide down letting him fill me. I take a moment to adjust to him as his hand moves around between my thighs and he begins to caress me again. My head falls back relaxing against his shoulder and his hips begin to roll causing him to thrust up and then pull out of me again and again.

"Oh shit," I gasp as his fingers pick up speed and my insides begin to tighten. "Fuck Christian."

"God you're easy today. I can feel you." He groans as he continues to work his fingers.

"Oh, shit. That's it. That's it." My breathing is getting ragged as I wait for my body to surrender.

"Come on baby. That's it," he grumbles as he works feverishly to bring me to the brink.

My muscles begin to tighten around him and my breath catches as I begin to lose control to him. "Oh shit. Christian." I can barely support myself as the spasms begin; tightening and releasing around him. Christian wraps his arms around my abdomen to support me as I give in to it. It never gets old; the trembling and shuddering that he coaxes from my body, the total surrender that he forces from me. Christian continues to rub and caress me until the contractions subside. Moving his hand he grabs my hips and gently raises me from his lap.

"Brace on the dash board," he growls. I quickly obey as he clutches my hips holding me over him and rapidly thrusts in and out. It doesn't take long before I can hear him growl, "Fuck," and hear his breathing catch. His head falls back against the headrest as he shudders beneath me. In a moment he releases his hold on my hips and I fall back on him, relaxing against his chest. I can still feel the occasional twitch as his release subsides and his erection dwindles. "Damn," he gasps. "I like driving you home."

"You mean you and Taylor don't do this when you get home in the evenings?" I giggle as I try to catch my breath.

"I'm not quite that easy. Now sit up so we can pry ourselves out of this tin can."

After getting out of the car and adjusting ourselves we start toward the door to the kitchen. "Wait." He whispers. "Here are your panties." He retrieves them from the floor board and hands them to me." I quickly stuff them in my purse then we hit the door entering the house.

As we enter the kitchen Gail has dinner going and it smells great. "Oh, there you are. I thought I heard the car a while ago." Gail smiles.

"You did." Christian tells her as he grabs a taste of the sauce from the pot on the stove. "Umm. Good."

"We were delayed a bit. Having a discussion." I tell her. I doubt she believes me.

Christian loosens his tie and unbuttons his top shirt button, "I'm going up to change. I'll be back down in a couple of minutes."

"I'm right behind you." I tell him. "How are the kids?" I ask Gail.

"They're good. They're over there watching TV and playing with each other." She nods toward the family room.

"Okay. How did Tommy do today?"

"Fine. I think he could use another toy or two. He's been white knuckling that truck all day again." She laughs. "God help anyone who tries to take it from him."

"I know. I have thought about getting him a few. I'd like to take that huge bed out of the guest room and put a smaller one in there for him. He just looks lost in that king sized bed all by himself. " I grab a strip of celery from the tray Gail has prepared and dip it into the warm spinach artichoke dip.

"I guess we could put the big bed in storage and move a twin in there for him while he's here." Gail suggests. "Any idea how long he's going to be here?"

"I don't know. I think that rehab program is three months. I guess he could be here the entire time." "Umm. That dip is great." "I'm just not sure how things are going to play out. How's he doing on his potty training?" I ask.

"Pretty good. He's gotten to where he asks when he has to go. He still jumps up on the seat, though."

"Humm. I guess I'll have to start trying to show him how to stand up and aim. He is dry at night when I get up with him. That's good." I continue to crunch my celery stick. "How are Teddy and 'Miss Grey'?"

"Good. They have been picking at each other all day. It's been raining and they are on each other's nerves."

"Christian is taking Teddy sailing tomorrow. That will get them away from each other for a bit. It'll be good for all of them. In fact, I think I may take Tommy and Grace out shopping. It wouldn't hurt to get Tommy a couple of toys and they both could use some clothes."

"You sure you want to try to handle two three year olds by yourself?" Gail asks.

"I think I can. I mean I don't see a problem with it."

"Well, Jason is going with Mr. Grey and Teddy tomorrow, so if you need me, give me a call."

"Why is Taylor going on a weekend? I thought he had them off?"

"Luke gets seasick. Rather than have him puke his guts out tomorrow, Jason offered to go."

"Oh. I didn't know. Well, if you're sure. I mean you might like to have a day to yourself."

"Na. I'm good. It might be fun."

"Okay. Thanks. If you're sure. I mean it is your day off."

"Yes. I'm sure." She says as she puts the fish in the poacher and slides it in the oven.

"Okay. You are a glutton for punishment Mrs. Taylor. I'm going up to get out of these clothes. I'll be back in a few minutes."

Walking in the bedroom, Christian is out of his clothes and in his boxers. He does look pretty hot.

"Here's your bag." He hands me the sack from the drugstore that he brought in from the car.

"Oh, thanks." I grab it and take it into the bathroom.

As I strip out of my clothes I hear Christian as he walks into my dressing closet. "I looked in your drugstore bag."

"You did? See anything you liked?"

" I noticed the Fleets. Does this mean we're definitely on for tonight?" He asks.

"Yep. I'm a woman of my word and knowing we have an appointment for certain activities this evening, I just want to prepare." I continue to get undressed.

"It doesn't bother you does it?"

"Well, if you attack the rosebud on the spur of the moment that's one thing, but if I know in advance, I like to be prepared."

"You do enjoy it, don't you?" he walks over and puts his hand on my upper arms rubbing them.

"Christian, you've never been concerned about this before. What's going on?"

"I love your ass, but I want to make sure you enjoy it too. I mean that prep can't be all that pleasant."

"Oh, Sweetheart." I put my arms around his waist. "If I didn't want to I'd say no. But I enjoy it too. I just think of the prep like brushing your teeth or taking a bath before sex. Besides all the porn stars do it." I give him a wink.

"You aren't a porn star. You're my wife. Big difference."

"I know. But I like being your porn star."

"You're pretty fantastic, you know that?"

"Yep. Just make sure you remember it."

"I could never forget it." he gives me a quick kiss. "You gonna' tell me about this women hittin' on me thing?"

"Oh. Well. Have you ever heard the phrase. 'Mr. Grey don't Stray '?"

"What?"

"Yeah. I heard that today."

"Well, I'd say it's pretty accurate, but where did you hear that?" he asks leaning on the door jamb still in his boxers, his arms folded across his chest.

"I heard it at Grey House. Just in passing. Let's just say I overheard a conversation."

"Where did you hear it and who was talking?"

"I'm not going to tell you. I was just amused and wondered if you have ever heard it said. Evidently the new female employees are told that. Seems once they've seen you they are smitten and that's the warning. Forget it because Mr. Grey don't stray."

"That's one reason I like Ros. I don't have to put up with that shit. It's fucking ridiculous."

"Oh, Christian. Don't be silly. Of course it's flattering to know that women find you attractive."

"I have nothing to do with it. I can't help the way I look. It's not something I encourage and I certainly don't welcome it. I mean sometimes it's an advantage, but sometimes it just fucking gets in the way."

"I know. I appreciate it, but then sometimes I get jealous. Like today." I confess.

"What? Deanne?"

"Yes. Deanne. She about came all over you. 'Oh, _Christian are you sure I can't talk you into dinner this evening?'_ " I mimic her.

"Oh, for fuck sake. She's old enough to be my….well my cousin. I have no interest in Deanne."

"I know you don't. I'm not worried about you succumbing to any of them. I just don't like them coming on to what is mine. I don't share Mr. Grey. I take care of what's mine." I walk over and throw my arm around his neck pulling his face to mine and plant my determined lips on his.

"Good. We're on the same page then." He swats my butt. "I still want to know who was talking about my personal life at the office."

"Christian. Get real. Do you think your employees never talk about you? Especially the women? They all want to fuck you. Of course they're going to talk about you."

"All of them?" he asks.

"Well maybe not Ros. But I'd say a good percentage." I give him a big smirk.

"Hmmm. Guess I never thought about it that way. I'll have to start paying more attention."

"No you don't. I like you oblivious to the feminine population at work." Christian walks over and puts his arms around me. "Baby I know what I have. I'll never jeopardize that. I didn't get where I am by being stupid. I came far too close once before and I don't repeat my mistakes. Not where you're concerned."

"I know. And I'm not worried. I guess I just have to check in occasionally. Take the temperature of the relationship."

"Baby I just fucked your brains out ten minutes ago. I think we're fine."

"I know." I have to giggle. " We did it in the R8. We've still got it."

"Yes. Sweetheart. We've still got it and I don't see us losing it anytime soon….if ever. Speaking of the car, you know your birthday is looming on the horizon."

"Don't remind me. I'm going to be thirty."

"I know. But I like older women." He grins without looking at me. " Besides you're holding up pretty well." I grab my shoe and throw it at him.

"Fuck you Grey."

"Again?" he laughs. "Seriously, have you given it any thought?"

"No not really. Just please don't get me another R8."

"But it's tradition. I get you a new one every year."

"Can we break with tradition, just this once? I don't need a new one. I like the one I have."

"Okay. Want to go to Maui?"

"Well I was going to talk to you about that."

"Going to the Maui house?" he zips the fly on his jeans.

"Sort of." I zip my jeans and pull on my T shirt. Christian is looking through his dresser for a shirt. "Dad and Myra don't want to have the wedding here. They want to do it on their own in Myra's church. I told Dad we'd like to give them the honeymoon. I was thinking we could send them to the Maui house for a week or so."

He shrugs. "Sounds fine to me. Do they want to go?"

"I don't know. I just told him that we'd like to give them a honeymoon."

"Sure. If they want to. It's fine with me. We'll fly them over."

"Oh. How did things go with the girl today?" He asks.

"Can we talk about it later? I want to spend some time with the kids before dinner."

"Sure." He puts his arm around my neck as we head for the door. "You can tell me about it while I'm ravishing that gorgeous ass later." He squeezes my ass and kisses my head as we walk out of the bedroom.

"Oh, I'm going to take Tommy and Grace shopping tomorrow while you and Teddy are out on the boat."

"Okay. What for?"

"They both could use some clothes. Tommy is staying dry most of the time , so I want to get him some underwear and grace needs some new shoes. I want to get Tommy a few toys, so he has some of his own to play with."

"Okay. Can you manage them both by yourself?"

"I think so, Gail has offered to go with me if I need her."

"Okay."

"Oh, and I want to take that king size bed out of the guest room and put in a twin bed for Tommy." I tell him. "He's so small and he's just lost in that bed."

"Ana. Don't overdo things. Remember you don't want him to get used to the lifestyle here and then take it away when he has to leave and go back with the girl."

"I won't. I just hate to see him swimming in that huge king size bed. I think he'll feel more secure in a smaller bed. Maybe even a full size like Grace has."

"Just be careful Sweetheart. Don't go overboard. And don't forget to tell me about what happened today. I want to hear everything after…well just after."

After making our way back downstairs, I hit my office to quickly check for any emails or messages that I might have missed while I was gone today. Nothing urgent it seems. Everything can wait. I'll catch up on my reading this weekend. I quickly join Christian who is in the family room with the kids. He is sitting in the floor with Teddy and Grace crawling all over him, giggling and squealing. Jack is bouncing and barking joining in. As usual Tommy is off to the side watching intently and clutching his plastic truck. He doesn't seem to know what to make of the playing.

"Tommy? Do you want to play with them?" I ask him.

He shakes his head continues to stare at my sweet trio roughhousing. "Come on. Come sit with me." I pick him up and carry him to the sofa. Sitting down I pull him into my lap, truck and all. "There's no need to be afraid, sweetheart. They aren't hurting each other. They are having fun. See they're laughing."

Christian gets up and comes over to join me on the sofa. As he does he leans over and grabs my waist motor boating my belly. I let out a scream when he does. "Christian don't do that!" I swat at him. Tommy's face frowns and he smacks Christian on the side of his head.

"NO. Done do dat." Tommy yells at him.

"Hey!" Christian looks over at Tommy and as he tries to take hold of him, Tommy jumps down and runs behind the sofa, truck in tow.

"Come here Tommy." Christian demands.

"NO!" Tommy stands his ground….behind the sofa.

Christian stands up and begins to walk toward Tommy. "I said come here." Christian almost sounds ominous. Christian continues to approach Tommy and I can see Tommy's eyes begin to fill with water and his chin begin to tremble.

"NO." He repeats to Christian. About the time Christian gets to him Tommy tries to take off. Christian catches him by the arm and snatches him off of the floor as Tommy begins to wail. "I. Said. Come. Here." Christian repeats. "I'm not going to hurt you."

Tommy is squirming and trying to get away from Christian as he cries and yells for Christian to release him. My two are frozen staring at what is unfolding before them. Christian leaves the room and heads upstairs with Tommy. I start to follow and then realize that this is between the two of them.

"Mom? Why did Tommy hit Dad?" Teddy asks.

"He thought your father was hurting me. He didn't understand we were playing."

"But why?" Teddy asks again. "Yeah why?" Grace parrots him.

"Come over here." I motion for the two of them to come sit with me. As they each sit on either side of me I wrap them in my arms. "Remember I told you that Tommy came from a place that was a lot different than we live in?"

"Uh huh." Teddy confirms.

"Well, where he lived, people didn't play with each other, in fact they weren't very nice to each other. Sometimes when we play, Tommy doesn't understand and he thinks we are hurting each other."

"But Dad would never hit you. He wouldn't hurt you."

"I know that, sweetheart. But Tommy hasn't been here long enough to understand that. He was just protecting me."

"Atecting you fwom what mama?" Grace asks.

"From Dad, stupid." Teddy answers.

"Teddy, don't call your sister stupid, baby. She doesn't understand." I warn him. "Grace, Honey, since Tommy never had any parents to play with him, he didn't understand that Daddy was playing with me. He thought Daddy was going to hurt me and he was trying to stop him."

"But Daddy neba hurt us." She reminds me.

"No sweetie, Daddy would never hurt us or anyone else. Daddy loves us. Tommy doesn't have a daddy so he doesn't understand."

"But Daddy cuwd be his daddy too." Grace offers.

"No he can't. You can't just be someone's dad. You have to be their kid first." Teddy explains.

"It's okay. Your dad is going to explain everything to him. Hopefully he can get Tommy to not be afraid of him." I stand up. "I'm going to run upstairs and check on them. I'll be right back." Leaving Teddy and Grace on the sofa I head up stairs and down the hall to Tommy's room. I can hear Tommy crying and Christian talking to him. When I reach the door and look in Christian is sitting on the bed and restraining Tommy in his lap. Tommy is crying and struggling and Christian is talking to him calmly trying to reassure him that he won't get hurt.

"Son. Son. Stop. I promise I'm not going to hurt you."

"No! Get down. Get down." Tommy is crying as he struggles.

"No hurt, Tommy. I said no hurt. Now stop." I watch as Christian pulls him tight in his arms and closes his eyes. "I know son. I understand. But I promise, no hurt. No one will hurt you, Tommy." Christian begins to rock him as he holds him tight. "No more hurt. No more hurt."

Tommy finally begins to relax and starts to wiper. "That's right. Everything is okay, son. No one will hurt you." Christian lets Tommy relax and he cradles him still rocking him. "That's right. Just relax. Everything is okay." I start to walk in and join them, but Christian shakes his head and motions for me to go away. I give him a quick nod of understanding and turn to go back down to our kids.

I get back downstairs just in time to see Grace haul off and hit Teddy. "I not tupid!"

"Owww!" Teddy grumbles and pulls his hand back to strike.

"Theodore Grey, don't you dare." I growl at him. "Don't think I don't see you."

"But she hit me first."

"Grace. We don't hit. I saw you hit Teddy and if you try it again, you'll go straight to your room. Understand?"

"Yesth ma'am. But he cawled me tupid." She explains.

"Did you call her stupid after I told you not to?" I ask him as I sit back down between them.

"Yes. But she is."

"Teddy, she is not stupid. She's younger than you are and she doesn't always understand the things you do. I don't want to hear any more of this."

"When's Dad coming back down?" he asks.

"He's talking to Tommy for a little bit. He'll be back down in a few minutes." I reach over and stroke his hair as he leans in against me. "Mom. When will Tommy go home?"

"When his mom gets better. She can't take care of him right now. Don't you get along with him?"

"Yeah. I guess. He's just. I don't know he acts weird sometimes."

"Weird? Weird, like how?" I ask him.

"He just sort of stands around and hangs on to that truck."

"I know. That truck is the only toy he has. He is very protective of it. And right now, he doesn't really know what to think of all of this. I think he'll feel more comfortable after he has been with us longer."

"Think about what?" Teddy asks confused.

"About the big house, and all the food and toys and having all of us around. Everything. All he has ever had is his mom and a really small apartment. I'm not sure he always had food when he was hungry."

"Tommy hungwy?"Grace asks.

"I think so sweetheart. I think sometimes he was probably hungry." I try to explain. "I know you won't understand but, his mom didn't always have money to buy food. Not everyone is like us and always has everything they need."

"We gib him sumpin to eat." Grace says. "I no wike Tommy to be hungwy." I look down and see her little eyes filling up.

I reach over and pull her into my lap, "Oh Sweetheart. Don't get upset. We're going to take good care of Tommy. Tommy won't ever have to worry about anything again. Your dad and I will make sure of it. Just understand that all of this is new for him and he feels a little lost right now."

"Okay. Mom." Teddy says. "We'll be nice to him."

"Thank you sweetheart. I appreciate it." I give him a big kiss on the head. We all turn to look as Christian descends the stairs carrying Tommy who is much calmer.

"Hey Dad." Teddy runs over to greet Christian. "Is he better?"

"Yes. I think Tommy and I understand each other a little better now." Christian sits on the sofa with Tommy in his lap. His little face is still pink and puffy and his lashes are wet. He leans into Christian and snuggles in his lap. I have no idea what happened up there, but it's so good to see Tommy not afraid. I just hope it lasts.

Gail calls dinner and we all traipse into the dining area and sit in our respective places. Gail puts the poached fish on the table. It is covered in a lemon cream sauce and garnished with lemon slices. Christian and I help the kids plates with the fish and add some boiled buttered new potatoes and asparagus. Teddy and Grace dive in, but Tommy looks a bit apprehensive.

"It's good sweetie. Give it a try. Don't you like fish?" I ask him.

Tommy shakes his head. "Wots pish?"

"It good. Twy it." Grace insists. She shovels her mouth full of food and then gapes it open at Tommy who begins to roll with laughter at the sight.

"Grace." I start to correct her, but then seeing the kids laughing, even Christian smiling, I just let it drop. It's the first time we've laughed all day.

"After dinner, we are out in the back yard as the sun begins to sink behind the horizon. It's beginning to get dark and the kids and Jack are screaming through the yard making use of the last bit of daylight. Getting out of my chair on the patio, I walk over to Christian and put my arms around his shoulder from behind. "Can you watch the kids?"

"Sure. You going in?" he asks.

"Yep. Got a little preparatory work to get done." I whisper in his ear then tug on his earlobe with my teeth.

He reaches back, cupping my head and kisses my cheek. "Okay. I'll get the kids to bed and meet you upstairs in a bit." He takes a sip from his wine glass.

"I'll be waiting. I'll be the one in the bubble bath." I borrow his glass and take a sip. "And bring a fresh bottle of this with you."


	67. Chapter 67

_**Fifty Shades…Full Circle**_

_**Chapter 67**_

**A/N: n-Boston You were absolutely right. Opportunity for a rewrite. You should log in.**

**This chapter contains mature subject matter. I know I have some young readers, so I wanted to give everyone a heads up about the content.**

* * *

"Hey, there." I hear Christians soft voice as I pull myself out my bubble bath stupor.

"Hey there yourself." I croak back and ogle up at him through one eye.

He sits on the edge of the tub as he hands me a cold glass of Pulley Fume. "I believe we have an appointment."

"Yes. I believe we do." Taking a sip. " Are the kids down?"

"Yep. I let them run until they dropped before bringing them in."

"You sure got them bathed and in bed fast."

"Bathed?" he asks raising his eyebrows. "I was supposed to bathe them?"

"I guess sleeping with a little dirt on 'em won't hurt." I give him a smile as I take another sip.

"I had other things on my mind."

"Well get out of those clothes, and get those other things in here with me."

Christian stands up and begins to peel his shirt off, then his jeans. The boxers quickly follow and in an instant he is slipping in behind me. "Aahhh. That's what I needed." I gush as I lean back on his chest. "The back of this tub is hard."

"So, I'm just a soft place to lean on?"

"No, Seweetie, you're _MY_ soft place to lean on." I wiggle my hips a bit. "Except for that hard thing in the middle."

"Sorry. Told you I had other things on my mind." He wraps one arm around my chest cupping a breast as he takes another sip of wine with his other.

"How was Tommy?" I ask relaxing against my husband.

"He's okay. It's gonna' be difficult for anyone who tries to come into his life. He trusts his Mom. Poor kid doesn't even realize she's the last person he needs to trust."

"But. She's getting better. I saw her today. She looks so much better."

"How did that go?" he asks.

"Fine. Helen and I went right in and met with her. She was back from detox and she looked better somehow. I mean she was still frail and looked pitiful, but she just looked better with all those drugs out of her system."

"Helen," he says.

"What?"

"It was Helen wasn't it?"

"What are you talking about?"

"Helen is the one that was discussing my personal life wasn't she?" he guesses.

"Boy. You're quick. It only took you six hours to figure that out." I giggle as I take a sip.

"Fucking…"

"Christian. Don't. I've already talked to her about her behavior. We didn't discuss you much. Actually it was me she was impressed with." I smugly inform him.

"I can see that."

"You can?" I sit up and turn around to look at him. "You're lying."

"No. I can see her wanting to meet you. I mean, after all you are married to me." He tries to stifle a chuckle.

"Asshole." I lean back against him again.

"I'm sorry. I can see why she would admire you. You're quite an impressive woman, Mrs. Grey." He gives me a hug. "Now which of your many accomplishments was she so taken with?"

I take another sip, realizing what my answer is, but not wanting to tell him.

"Well? What did she say?"

"She was impressed with the fact that I got you to marry me and I can keep you from fooling around." I mumble.

"What? Was that something about you being married to _me_?" he teases.

"Yes. Damn it. She was impressed that I was able to keep you from straying. But she was also impressed with the way I handled things when you were shot and kidnapped in Colombia."

"Did you tell her that it was I who convinced _you_ to marry _me_? That I don't cheat because there is nothing out there that could ever hold a candle to the woman I'm married to? That you'd cut off my balls and feed them to me if you ever caught me with another woman?"

"I didn't go into detail." I pout. "I told her it was none of her business and that it was inappropriate for her to be talking to me about it or for the employees to be discussing your personal life."

"There you go. That's my girl."

"After we got that settled, seeing Lorna was a piece of cake." I tell him. "She was agreeable and almost eager to sign the papers. She was going to sign them without reading them, but I insisted that Helen explain them to her. I wanted her to understand what she was signing."

"You got them witnessed?"

"Yes. One of the caregivers there was in the room and he witnessed and signed the papers. There was a notary too and she notarized the signatures."

"Good. I don't want her trying to say we tried to keep the kid from her."

"Christian, I don't think she would do that. She seems genuinely grateful for what we are doing."

"I'm sure she is. She was one day out of detox. Give her a bit. When she starts wanting the stuff bad enough, she'll say or do anything to get it. And that includes turning on us."

"Do you think so?"

"Sweetheart, I know so." He drains his glass. "Detox was nothing compared to what she's headed for. She got clean in a nice, safe, clean hospital. The hard part will be staying clean. I'm not particularly encouraged." He grabs the bottle and pours another glass. "More?"

"Yeah. I hold my glass back over my shoulder as he tops it off.

"Oh Christian. I hope she can hold it together. That little boy deserves so much better than he's gotten so far."

"Tell me about it. He's got a hell of a long road in front of him too."

"What happened?"

"When?"

"When you were upstairs with Tommy? After he hit you?"

"Not much. He's scared shitless of men. That includes me" He sighs. "I'm not sure just what he's been through, but I can guess. Good thing is, he'll forget a lot of the specifics through the years. The memories will fade. But that feeling will always be there. Things will bother him or he'll feel scared in situations and not know why. He'll feel hungry and be afraid that he won't be able to find anything to eat then not understand why he feels that way. Hearing someone raise their voice will make him want to hide and he won't know why. Watching someone get hit in a movie or on TV will make him sick to his stomach and he won't know why it affects him that way." "And the night mares. They'll always be there and he won't know how to get rid of them. He won't know that's he's worth a shit no matter how many times someone tells him he is. He'll spend the rest of his life trying to show the world that he isn't like his mother. That he has a right to be here. That he's as good as anyone else…"

I turn around and cup his face in my hands. "That he is worthy of being loved. That he is important to the people in his life. That I can't live without him."

Christian gives me a half smile. "Yeah. That too."

"No. Not that too. That's everything." I softly press my lips to his and he puts his arms around me pulling me to him.

I rest my head on his shoulder, "So what happened? Is he okay?'

"He'll get there. I just talked to him and told him I understood why he was scared. I tried to convince him that no one here was going to hurt him. I told him I would never hurt you, so he didn't have to defend you." He strokes my bare back with his fingers. "You're his savior you know?"

"What?"

"Yep. You got him out of the hell he was living in and brought him to this castle of a house. You bought him clothes and gave him a warm dry bed. You keep him clean and fed. You hold him and read to him. He will protect you from anything. Even your big bad husband."

"I don't think I want to be protected from my big bad husband." I give him a wicked smile as I reach down and take the firm member in my hand.

"Careful, some women have considered that a weapon of ass destruction."

"Good lord. Weapon of ass destruction? Where do you get this stuff?" I chuckle.

"Can't fight the truth, baby." He guides my head over to lean in until he can press his mouth against mine. His teeth nip at my lower lip and his tongue slips between mine opening my mouth to him. As he glides his fingers through my hair, my body relaxes against his. I search his mouth and his hand explores my back moving down my spine; his finger smoothly slipping between my cheeks to caress the pucker nestled there.

"Mmmmm." I audibly exhale as my lips break with his and I wiggle my ass. His finger gently massages the tight opening. "Let's get out." I murmur against his cheek. Christian nods and quickly stands up pulling me with him. Standing against him my breasts press into the firm flesh that is his chest and his arms circle me as his hands massage my butt. His mouth has once again found mine and his moist breath falls against my wet skin as his mouth glides over my lips then moves over my cheek and to my neck. His lips trace my dripping flesh down until his tongue caresses an erect nipple. My body shudders and releases a soft moan as he takes it in his mouth sucking and pulling. "Oh, fuck," escapes my lips as my head falls back forcing my breast farther into his grasp.

His hands move up my back and pull me closer as he sucks and kisses the skin beneath my ear. In one move he bends down and puts his arm behind my knees and pulls me up into his arms. For a moment he searches my face, "You're so fucking beautiful."

"I love you, Christian." Circling my arms around his neck I once again press my lips to his as he steps over and we leave the tub. As he stands me on the floor he reaches over and grabs a fluffy white towel from the warmer and wraps me in it cocooning me against him. "I don't want you getting cold," he smiles down at me and then rubs the towel over my body. When I'm dry I return the favor and take the same towel and start to blot the water from his body. Christian takes the towel from me and drops it on the floor. "I want you, Anastasia." He whispers against my ear.

"I'm yours. Take me to bed." I whisper back. As I do Christian sweeps me off of my feet and carries me back to our bed gently placing me in the center. In one motion he moves on top and caresses my hair before pressing his lips to mine and my legs automatically wrap around him. "My God , I love your skin. It's like satin." He growls as he plies my body with kisses and glides his tongue over my skin. My flesh is on fire as his lips gently move from my neck to my navel and hit every spot in between. His mouth stops to worship my breasts pulling a nipple into his mouth as his hard erection presses into my belly. His tongue swirls and licks and undulates against the erect flesh. "Oh, shit." I gasp as my hands twist in his hair pulling him closer. "Your breasts are so perfect. So perfect baby." He whispers as he leaves them and moves up to kiss me again.

"Come here." He growls as he sits up on his knees and pulls me to him by my knees. Pressing his palms against my inner thighs he forces my legs apart exposing me to him. I know what's coming and I can feel myself begin to tighten in anticipation as my thighs fall open for him. In an instant he buries his head between my legs and I can feel his cheek stubble move against my sensitive skin as his mouth begins to dance over my wet flesh. "Oh. My. God. Baby." I gasp as my hands find his copper hair and I twist my fingers in it. Christian's arms wrap under and around my thighs as he pulls me closer allowing his tongue to caress and circle my engorged flesh. "Aahhhg." I whimper as the muscles tense in my belly "Shhh." He breathes against me momentarily stopping his oral caresses.

"I can't help it." I almost cry. I'm about to come off of the bed and my hips roll and pitch against him.

"Still, baby," he whispers. His hands find mine and he laces our fingers together as he continues to press his mouth against me. "Oh, fuck. Christian. Oh, fuck." I whimper. His mouth vibrates against me as he moans still gliding his tongue across me; circling, sucking, pulling. I can feel the droplets of perspiration tickle as they run down my belly and collect in my navel; my belly trembling and thrusting as he pushes me harder and faster to the brink. Raising my head I look down just in time for our eyes to lock. As I watch him lost in his mission to give me pleasure as only he can, his eyes close and he groans as his tongue begins to flick back and forth. "Oh, fuck, oh fuck, oh fuck." I can feel all of my muscles begin to tighten and Christian squeezes my hands firmer in his grasp intensifying his oral efforts. Panting I to try to catch my breath as my body is reaching its limit.

One final caress of his tongue and I'm over. My belly begins to tremble as my climax ravages my body. "Oh, My God." I growl. "Christian." My flesh spasms against his mouth and he only intensifies his movements, coaxing the contractions from me and extending the pleasure for as long as he can. It's so intense I can't decide if I'm experiencing pain or pleasure. It's almost too much to endure and when I think I can't continue, my body takes pity and begins to relax. "Ah, shit." I gasp as I try to find my breath. Without missing a beat Christian moves up my body and his mouth finds mine. His face is glistening with the cocktail of my arousal and his saliva and I can still taste myself on his tongue as he moves it past my lips. "Fuck I love to watch you." He growls into my mouth. "You're so fucking beautiful."

My knees pull up to my chest and I press my feet against his ass trying to pull him to me. "Come here baby. I want you." I murmur. As I raise my hips he rolls his and his now rigid member glides in past the drenched folds, filling me in one move.

"Aaahhh. God that's good." He snarls taking a moment to enjoy the feeling of my walls cocooning his engorged member. My hands glide through his hair as our eyes meet momentarily. He lowers his head and seals his mouth against mine as he begins to rock his hips forcing himself in and out of me.

We are both drenched and our skin easily glides across each other on a layer of perspiration. I can feel the male prickle of his chest hair and his happy trail against my smooth feminine skin and I love it. I love his maleness and my nostrils flare taking in his scent as he undulates against me. "Oh fuck, baby. You feel so good. You're so soft." He whispers never stopping his gentle thrusting. As he continues he begins to pick up speed and he buries his head in my neck as I envelope him in my arms. "Oh fuck," he growls against my skin. "God I need you." With every thrust forward he is picking my hips up off of the bed and I can see him working his way to his release.

Suddenly he stops and withdraws making me gasp. He sits up on his knees, "Turn over," he growls as he helps me to my tummy. He grabs my hips and pulls me up to prop on my knees and elbows. I can feel his warm breath as he gently pulls my cheeks apart and his tongue caresses the pulsing opening between them. "Oh, My god." I have to whimper as his tongue circles and strokes the delicate opening. The feeling is incredible as he stimulates the multitude of tiny nerve endings located there. His fingers pull through the drenched folds between my thighs and he spreads the slick arousal up and over the my now relaxing rose. I can only moan as Christian gently massages the fluid over the sphincter gently pressing and prodding, relaxing the muscles with his fingers.

"I love your ass. It's so damn gorgeous." He growls and he continues to massage and lick and kiss between my cheeks. As I begin to relax I feel the gentle pop as his index finger passes the tight threshold. "Ohh." I gasp.

"Are you okay?" He asks.

"Yeah. It just surprised me." I sigh.

I relax and moan as he gently moves his finger in and out easing the opening a little wider. "Still okay?" he checks as he rest his head on my butt still working his finger in and out. "Yes. It feels good." I groan back. In a brief instant he pulls his fingers through the wetness again and I can feel that he has exchanged his index finger for his thumb. It gently pops past the threshold and glides in and out as he softly spreads kisses over my ass. The feeling is incredible as he continues to move in and out relaxing me. His other hand moves around front and his fingers find that sweet spot that is still so sensitive and engorged from my recent orgasm. "Oh shit." I gasp as begins to circle and caress. As his thumb moves out I can feel the change as he inserts his index and middle finger gently relaxing and loosening me. I can feel his erection as is bobs between my thighs waiting in anticipation as his fingers pave the way.

"Oh God, that feels good." I gasp lowering my cheek and resting it on the duvet. Christian pulls his erection through my folds spreading my slick arousal on his rigid member. In a moment I can feel him gently pushing against me. "Push back baby." He murmurs. I obey until I hear him gasp as he gently pops past the little opening and he enters me. "That's it. That's good." He growls to me. What should logically be uncomfortable is exciting and feels incredible. But then Christian is an experienced lover. And after eight years, he knows just how my body will respond to him. He understands my needs and wants. He knows what he gives me, he will get back tenfold from me as his lover.

Christian gradually begins to rock his hips and slowly, gently advances inward. "Oh shit, this is good." He growls. "I know." I answer in a gasp. Christian's fingers again find my wet engorged flesh as he gently rocks in and out of me. I can feel him pushing me toward another climax as he marches toward his own. He slowly picks up speed as he pushes farther in and I can hear his breathing becoming ragged and uneven. My body is beginning to quiver as his fingers dance over my wet flesh and he thrusts in and out.

My God this is so intense. I can hear the grunts as the air leaves his chest in spurts with each thrust. "Oh, fuck. Oh baby you feel so good." He grumbles never missing a stroke. "Christian." I whimper as I can feel my muscles begin to tense. "That's right. Come for me baby," he snarls. "I need you to come again."

"Christian." I gush as I surrender to him again, my body trembling beneath him; drowning in the intense sensory overload. I gasp as I finally catch my breath again. Christian places both hands on my hips and intensifies his march. He is thrusting with determination. He is a man on a mission and his goal is his climax. He pulls my hips back to meet his every thrust until I feel him begin to tense. "Oh fucking shit. Ana." He growls and thrusts once more before folding over me and trembling against my back. His cheek is resting on my spine and his breath is falling warm on my skin as he rides out his orgasm. "God, baby." He gasps as he catches his breath and gently kisses my back. I fall on the bed on my stomach and he follows me lying over me and engulfing me in his arms. As his erection retreats, I can feel him snuggle against me pressing soft kisses over my shoulders. "Thank you baby. That was incredible."

"It was my pleasure. Literally." I whisper as I turn over underneath him. He falls on his back beside me and I watch his belly glisten under the soft light as he heaves to catch his breath. He looks over and strokes my cheek with the backs of his fingers. "Do you know how much I love you?"

"Probably as much as I love you." I take his hand kissing his fingers then turn over crawling up against his chest.

"How's your ass?" he grins as his hand gently strokes a butt cheek.

"Sufficiently destroyed." I smile back. "It's actually pretty happy right now."

"Good." He gasps still trying to catch his breath. He runs his hand through his wet hair. "I think we're going to need another bath," he suggests.

"Can we snuggle a bit first?" I ask.

"Always." He says as he pulls me closer and kisses my forehead. "There's no one I'd rather snuggle with than you."


	68. Chapter 68

_**Fifty Shades…Full Circle**_

_**Chapter 68**_

Lying on my tummy my hand slides across the bed for Christian but instead all it finds is a cold hard object. Grabbing the handle I look over to see what is in the bed next to me instead of my husband and see my reflection in my hand mirror. Damn. I'm almost glad he's not here to see this. I don't look just fucked, I look just dug up. As I start to put the thing down I notice a note attached to the handle. With one eye open I try to read it. 'SMILE. You're looking at the woman I love. See you later, baby. Love Christian.'

Aaawww. That's my baby. I release my reflection and turn over on my back to stretch and yawn, beginning my Saturday morning. I guess Christian has already collected Teddy and taken off for the Marina and their day on the lake. After my stretch, I turn over and clutching the mirror to me, I snuggle back down and close my eyes for a few more minutes. When I regain consciousness again, I look at the clock and it's nine. Goodness it's good to sleep, especially since I was up again with Tommy last night; as I am every night. What's with this nightmare thing? Christian was right, it happens Every. Fucking. Night. I just wish I could find a way to get them to stop, poor little guy. Speaking of Tommy, he and Grace should be awake by now.

Throwing my feet to the floor I pad to the bathroom, relieving myself, brushing my teeth and washing my face. Christian and I had our second bath afterwards last night. I just love the morning after a good romp. I always feel so well rested and relaxed….and happy. As I drag a brush through my hair I remind myself to talk to Christian about getting it cut. Not that I need his permission, it will just save me having to look at his pouting face for a few days after I do it.

Finally all refreshed, I scamper up the hall to Tommy's room and peek in the door. I'm taken aback when I see the huge bed empty. The only remnant being the rumpled covers in the middle where Tommy slept. I check the bathroom, but he isn't there either. Changing direction I head down to Grace's room and peek in. There on the floor sit Tommy and Grace. He is still in his pajamas with Spiderman all over them and she is in her pink night gown with the ruffle on the bottom. Grace has her tea set out and her dolls. Seems she is trying to make Tommy the daddy and forcing him to drink 'pretend' coffee and take care of the baby. Tommy isn't having any of it.

"Yesth. You have ta be tha daddy. I be the mommy." Grace insists.

"But why? I don't like a be a daddy." Tommy tells her.

"But you have a be a daddy. You da boy. I be a mama 'cause I be a gwirl." She insists. "Dwink your coffee."

"I done wike coffee." Tommy tries to tell her shaking his head.

"But daddies dwink coffee and mamas oppose ta dwink tea."

I slid through the door, "Good morning." I give them both a big smile and walk over and sit down crossed legged on the floor with them. "Did everyone sleep well last night?"

Tommy gins over and nods. Grace crawls over and hugs my neck. I pull her into my lap as I give her a huge kiss and a hug. "Your hair is all over your head, little girl."

"I know. It opposed to be on my head." She grins as she pats her head.

"Are you two ready for some breakfast?" I ask and they both vigorously nod. "What are you hungry for?"

"Pannicakes." Grace jumps in.

"Tommy what do you want?"

"Ce-we-al."

"Are you sure? Wouldn't you like some pancakes?" I ask him.

"Ukay. Pantakes."

Standing I grab both of them by the hand and we head down the staircase and to the kitchen.

"Gail? What are you doing here?" I ask as I see her working away in the kitchen. She looks so relaxed in her jeans and T-shirt covered by an apron. Her hair is in a ponytail rather than her usual chignon.

"Jason left with Mr. Grey and Teddy, so I thought I'd wander over here and eat with the kids and see if you needed help today."

"If you are totally sure you don't mind going on your day off, I'd love the company, Mrs. Taylor." Gail is beating the batter for what looks like pancakes. "How did you know the kids wanted pancakes?"

"I've known that little girl since before she was born. When you ask her what she wants for breakfast, she always says pancakes."

"Okay you two. Go turn on the TV while I help Gail get breakfast going." Releasing their hands they run into the family room and Grace grabs the remote making sure she is in charge of choosing the program.

"What can I do?" I ask Gail.

"Grab the bacon and get it going." She tells me. I do as I am told and get the bacon laid out on the broiling pan and in the oven. Then I grab some plates and flatware and lay the table adding orange juice and the butter and syrup.

"You seem happy," I mention as I catch Gail humming a tune.

"I am. Jason was in a bit of a romantic mood this morning."

"Ahh. I see that does always make for a nice start to the day." I smile over at her. "Christian was already gone when I woke up." I pout.

"I'm sorry."

"Don't be. Last night almost carried over to this morning. See?" I give her a big fake grin.

Gail chuckles to herself. "How did Tommy do last night?"

"Same. Another nightmare in the middle of the night."

"Oh. Poor little guy." She shakes her head. "I remember when Mr. Grey used to have those awful nightmares," she says. "You could hear him all over the apartment. I would feel so sorry for him."

"Thank God those are a thing of the past." I garble as I take a sip of juice.

"Me too. Hand me a plate please." Gail asks. Gail takes up the pancakes and I grab the bacon and we head to the dining table. "Okay. Breakfast is ready." I holler and they both come running. Gail brings in her coffee and my tea as I pour each child a glass of milk. I help Tommy's plate with two pancakes and a couple of pieces of bacon. A pat of butter on each and some syrup then cut it in to manageable pieces and he is set. Gail does the same for Grace. And we all enjoy a nice Saturday morning pancake breakfast.

"Oh, Gail? Did I tell you that Daddy and Myra won't be having the wedding here?"

"No. Where are they going to have it?"

"At some little church where she went as a kid. Dad said she didn't want anything big."

"Well, I have to say your father agrees with her. She is all smiles on Friday afternoons when it's time to leave. I think she goes to Montesano every weekend."

"I thinks she does, too. I don't hear much from Daddy on the weekends, so I figures he's been occupied." I audibly exhale. "I'm just glad he's happy. He deserves to be after all those years." Grace has syrup all over her face and so does Tommy. They are laughing and having a contest to see who can open their mouth the widest with it full of pancakes. "Hey. Forks please. We don't use our hands to eat. And don't open your mouth with food in it." I try to sound authoritative, but I love the sound of them laughing and giggling. Grace is clearly enjoying having someone her own age to play with. She and Teddy adore each other, but Teddy's getting older getting to be more of a little boy instead of a baby. The gap between their interests is growing wider and wider. He prefers to spend time with his Dad more so than with Grace or me for that matter.

I like that he's so close to Christian, but I miss my baby. I can remember a time when I thought it would be just me and Teddy. Christian was so angry that I got pregnant so soon after we got married. For an instant I thought he would leave me. I thought I'd be raising our baby by myself. But I was so young then and had no idea just how much he loved me. I don't think he even knew how much he loved me. Didn't take him long to come around to the idea of Teddy. One ultra sound and he was in love. I try to make sure that Christian and I have our time together without the kids. He needs that and so do I, but especially him. Sometimes he's like my third child needing my undivided attention. But it works.

"Would you two like to go shopping today?" I ask. Grace's eyes get to be as huge as saucers and she grins.

"Yea. Thoppin." She squeals.

"Whots thoppin?" Tommy asks so seriously.

"We get stuff." Grace tries to explain.

Tommy still looks confused. "Sweetheart. We need to go to the store and get you some more clothes and a few more toys. Would you like that?" I try to explain to him.

"My twuck." He looks like he is going to cry.

"I know. Sweetie. No one is going to take your truck, but we can get you more toys to play with. Would you like that?" Tommy still looks like has no concept.

"I get a new dwess, Mama?" Grace asks.

"Well, you really need some new shoes. Those little Nikes are getting too small."

"But I wan a new dwess." She pouts.

"Well, I guess we can look at some dresses, if you want to. I think you must have grown an inch this summer." "Tommy you could use some khakis and a couple of new shirts and some new shoes."

"Whots a kack, kaksis?" He asks and I have to laugh at him trying to pronounce it.

"It's pants sweetheart. You need some pants and maybe a new pair of jeans. You can't wear the same thing day after day."

Tommy looks down and pulls at his pajama top. "I wike dees. I wike pider man."

"I'm glad. Maybe we can find you some more Spiderman things."

My cell rings and I see it's Christian. "Hey. How are my men enjoying the water?"

"Hi Baby. We are just pulling away from the marina and I wanted to call. I enjoyed last night."

"Me too. I'm having breakfast with the kids and Gail."

"I see. I'll keep the dirty talk to a minimum, Mrs. Grey."

"We can discuss later. How is Teddy?"

"Having a ball. He's up with Mac right now and I wanted to just call right quick since I left you asleep this morning."

"I appreciated that. I got your message. It was sweet."

"I meant it. You're the only girl for me, Mrs. Grey. It was all I could do not to make love to you again this morning."

"Like I said, I'm with the kids and Gail, but we will definitely revisit the situation later."

I can hear him chuckle. "Okay, Baby. I guess I'd better go rescue Mac. I'll see you later."

"Okay. You two have fun. And Christian…take care of our son."

"I will. Don't worry."

"And take care of you too."

"You got it babe. We'll see you in time for dinner."

"Okay. I love you."

Gail and I spend the day with two three year olds shopping for clothes. Tommy has gotten two pair of khaki slacks with a white shirt and three polo shirts as well as two pair of jeans and five T-shirts, two bearing the likeness of Spiderman. He got two pair of swimming trunks, since the pool is supposed to be finished this weekend. A pair of dress shoes and a pair of little Nikes. And another set of Spiderman pajamas.

Grace has gotten a new flower print sundress and a pink pair of Nikes. She can still fit into the swim suites I got her earlier in the year, so she is set for clothes. Next the toy store.

After a lunch at McDonalds, the children's choice for haute cuisine, we head to Magic Mouse. Three floors of toys and imagination. It's all Gail and I can do to keep track of the two of them. They want to run everywhere, trying out all of the different toys available. It takes Tommy a few minutes to adjust; I don't think he has ever been in a place like this. But Grace, being a veteran is more than willing to indoctrinate him to the purchasing of toys.

He seems to always head to the cars and trucks. But he does find a teddy bear that he is particularly taken with. After he finds it he carries it with him all over the store. I'm sure it will find its way back to the car with us. Grace has found a huge doll house that she insists she needs, but I'm thinking more like Santa and Christmas or maybe birthday. Tommy really seems to be taken with the art section, wanting crayons and some water color paints. Looks like a mess waiting to happen, but I agree to let him have them with Gail's approval.

Finally our haul is taken to the waiting SUV and loaded for us. Grace isn't happy that she had to leave the doll house behind, but she'll get over it. Both kids are strapped into their car seats and just a buzz with the day's events. It's getting time to get home and start something for dinner and I'm sure Gail is ready to collapse.

"I'm just amazed at how well, Tommy and Grace get along." I tell Gail after observing them all day long. "They don't pick at each other like Teddy and Grace do."

"Maybe it's because they're so close in age or maybe because they aren't related. They do get along though." She smiles back at them.

After we pull in to the garage and get the loot unloaded, I make Gail go home. The kids are asleep in front of the TV and I've gotten chicken out for the grill. After putting potatoes in to bake, I give Christian a call to make sure they are on the way home.

"I'm sorry the customer you have called is either out of range or has turned their phone off."

That's weird. Christian doesn't turn his phone off. They shouldn't be out of range unless maybe, they've pulled into some little inlet and the signal is blocked. But they should be on their way home. It's almost dinner time.

"Gail?"

"Yes Ana?"

"I can't seem to reach Christian. Have you heard from Taylor?" I ask her.

"I laid down and took a nap when I got in. Let me try to give him a call and I'll let you know."

"Okay. Give me a call back as soon as you hear something."

I continue my work getting dinner on the way, but it bothers me that I can't get hold of Christian.

"Ana?" I hear Gail on the other end of the phone.

"Yes."

"I can't reach Taylor. I get a message that his phone is off." She tells me.

"That's not right. They can't both have their phones off. Let me try the phone on the boat. I'll call you right back."

I look up the number to the boat phone and place the call. All I can get is a busy signal. Nothing. Now I really don't like this.

"Gail? I'm getting nothing. What should we do? Do you think they're alright?"

"Gosh, Ana. I'm not sure. I can't imagine that there would be any trouble, but you're right. This is highly unusual that we can't reach them."

"Did Taylor say who the security detail would be today? Who is following them?"

"I don't think anyone is. Mr. Grey told Taylor that since it was the weekend and they would only be out a short while, he didn't think it was necessary."

"Did Taylor listen to him?"

"Well, I know he didn't agree with Mr. Grey, but he never goes against him. Ana, I don't think they have anyone following."

"Shit. Gail, now I'm getting worried. I don't like this."

"Me either, but you know Taylor and Mr. Grey can take care of themselves. Let's give them a bit. Maybe they are just in an area that they can't get reception. Let's not get worried yet."

"It's too late for that. My son is on that boat. I trust both Christian and Taylor, but…"

"It's okay, Ana. I'm sure they're fine. Do you want me to come wait with you?"

"No. No, we're fine. I'm sure it's nothing. Maybe we'll hear something in a bit. I'll give them a little while longer before I get hysterical. If I send security out looking for them for no reason, Christian will have a fit. It's not dark yet. Maybe ….gosh, I don't know maybe what. Call me if you hear anything."

"I will. Have a glass of wine and I'm sure we'll hear something in a bit."

"Okay. Bye."

I'm not about to start drinking wine with Christian out of touch and two three year olds to watch. Although common sense would indicate that is the perfect time to start drinking. It's been forty five minutes and we still haven't heard anything. The sun has set and there is only a trace of light left. For some reason I keep going out into the yard and looking out on the lake. I don't know why. It's way too shallow for the boat to be even close to the house. I've called Christian several more times and still can't raise him on his phone or the boat phone.

"Ana?" I about jump out of my skin. Turning around to look I see Gail walking in the family room.

"Good heavens, you scared me."

"I'm sorry. I just wanted to see if you had heard anything. I still can't get Jason."

"No. Nothing. I think it's time to call security and try to find them." I suggest.

Gail nods. "I do too. If, God forbid, something has happened to them, we don't want too much time to pass."

"Watch the kids for me for a second." I ask her.

Dialing my phone. "Welch. Hi, this is Ana Grey. I hate to bother you on a weekend, but I think Christian and Teddy might be missing."


	69. Chapter 69

_**Fifty Shades…Full Circle**_

_**Chapter 69**_

Dialing my phone. "Welch. Hi, this is Ana Grey. I hate to bother you on a weekend, but I think Christian and Teddy might be missing."

"No problem, Mrs. Grey. What's going on?"

"Well, Mr. Grey took Teddy out on the boat today. They were supposed to be on Lake Washington. They were due home before dinner, but they aren't home yet." I realize I'm running on.

"It's okay Mrs. Grey. Take a deep breath. Now who was with them? I understand it was to be Mac and Taylor. Is that correct?"

"Yes. Mac and Taylor, Mr. Grey and Teddy."

"My understanding was that there was no security detail following in another craft."

"Yes. That's what I was told." I agree. "Welch, I've called Christian's phone, Taylor's phone and the boat phone and I can't reach any one."

"Okay. Let me get in touch with the security team working the weekend and I'll get right back with you. Can I reach you at this number?"

"Yes. I'm at home. Gail Taylor is with me."

"I'll see what's going on and call right back. And Mrs. Grey, try not to worry, I'm sure everything is okay. It's probably an IT glitch that you can't reach them by phone. Sit tight and I'll call right back."

"Okay. Thank you. I'll be waiting."

"What did he say?' Gail asks as she walks over to talk to me. We are whispering trying not to let the kids overhear our conversation.

"He is at home. He's going to call the security team on duty to see what's going on. He thinks it might be an IT glitch that we can't reach them by phone."

"Well it's not an IT glitch that they aren't home and haven't called." Gail says.

"I know. I think he was trying not to scare me. It's not working."

Within a few minutes my phone rings and it's Welch. "Mrs. Grey?"

"Yes. Have you heard anything?"

"I just spoke with Alvarez who is monitoring security this weekend. It seems that both Mr. Grey and Taylor's phones are nonfunctioning. We aren't able to raise the craft by radio either. A few minutes ago we began receiving an emergency signal form the black box on the craft. I've dispatched the copter to obtain their location."

"What do you mean an emergency signal from a black box?"

"There is a black box on the craft that emits a signal when it's turned on. It helps us locate the last position of the craft. If we follow that signal we should find the box."

"The box? What about the boat? If you find the box will you find the boat?"

"Hopefully."

"Hopefully? What does that mean?" I'm almost hysterical now.

"Well the signal is emitted from the box. Now that box could be on the boat, or it could have been removed from the boat, or it could be at the bottom of the lake. What we will find is the box. Hopefully that box is still on the craft."

"What? Where else would it be?"

"It is most likely still on the boat, but like I said it could have been tossed overboard or moved to another craft or..."

"Welch, just please stop. How long before you find it?"

"It shouldn't be too long. Mrs. Grey. I'd like your permission to contact the Coast Guard. They can track the signal as well and they will be on the water. If there is any trouble it will be necessary to be on the water. We can't do much from the helicopter."

"Of course. You don't have to ask me. Just do it."

"Mrs. Grey, as soon as they are contacted it will be public knowledge and the press will most likely become involved."

"Welch I don't care. I just want them found. You have my permission to do whatever is necessary to find them."

"Yes ma'am. I'll notify the Coast Guard and they can dispatch a water craft to head toward that signal. The copter is already in the air and I'll notify Gwen that the media will more than likely be involved shortly."

"Thank you. Welch, please just find them."

"Will do Mrs. Grey. And try not to worry. I'm sure it's probably just a malfunction or something like that. The chances that something criminal has happened is highly unlikely. We would have picked up it if something had been in the works."

I close my eyes and try to erase this conversation from my mind. "Okay. Call me the instant you hear anything."

"Will do Mrs. Grey."

"Well?" Gail asks.

"I felt better before I called him." I explain.

"Ana what is it?" Gail asks. She looks worried.

"We, it seems there is this black box that is on the boat and it has been turned on and is sending out an emergency signal. Welch said he isn't able to reach them by phone or radio."

"Oh, no." Gail gasps. "They've turned on the emergency beacon?"

I nod. "Yes. According to Welch they have." I'm doing my best to let the tears in my eyes fall. "They have sent the helicopter out and I gave them the go ahead to call the Coast Guard."

"Ana. They're going to be okay." Gail tries to be reassuring.

"I know. I'll just feel better when I know where they are." I take a moment to compose myself. "I think we need to get dinner started. I'm sure Teddy and Grace are hungry. I mean Tommy. Tommy and Grace will be hungry."

"You're right. It'll keep us busy."

"I'll go start the grill. I got some chicken out and there are potatoes in the oven baking."

"Want me to open a bottle of wine?" Gail asks.

"I hate to drink anything right now, but go ahead. I'll have a little." Walking out on the patio I flip the switch and light the grill to let it warm up. As the fame begins to burn I walk out on the lawn into the now dark evening. The sky is unusually clear and I can smell the ocean. The lights are shimmering off of the water in the lake. Water always looks so black and ominous at night. I can't bear to think of Teddy anywhere near it. I know where ever they are Christian is taking care of him. God I hope they come home safe and sound so I can kill him. Suddenly I hear what sounds like the helicopter. Maybe they found them. That was quick. The copter gets closer and finally begins to hover over the yard. The wind from the blades is blowing everything around and they are shining lights all over the yard. It doesn't take long to realize that it's the press. Damn they found out quickly. I make a hasty retreat to the patio and head indoors.

"MAMA! MAMA! What it is?" Grace comes screaming toward the patio door just in time for me to pick her up and close the door then quickly darken the windows obstructing their view into our home.

"Good heavens, Ana. What is it?" Gail runs out of the kitchen.

"A damn news helicopter. They're like blood hounds. I'm surprised they didn't know they were missing before we did."

Looking into the family room I look over and see Tommy in the floor crying.

"I'll get him." Gail walks into the family room and picks up Tommy and we try to quiet both children. Tommy is clinging to his new teddy bear and Grace is dressed in her new princess costume, complete with tiara.

"It's just an old helicopter, baby. See? It flew away." I try to comfort Grace.

"Why is da hewacoter here?" she asks.

"It's just people from the TV station being nosey. They were just looking at the yard."

"Day wook at da new poow? She asks.

"Yes, sweetie. I think they were looking at the new pool." I pull her hair out of her face. "Are you getting hungry?"

She gives me a big nod. "Tommy are you hungry, baby?" He gives me a nod from behind his bear. "Well, let me get into the kitchen and get dinner finished."

"Mama? Where Teddy?" Grace asks.

"He is with daddy. They'll be home in a little bit."

"Daddy not on a twip?" she asks.

"No sweetie. Daddy's not n a trip. He went out on the boat and is just late getting back. He and Teddy will be home before long."

"Tommy do you like your new teddy bear?" I ask as he clutches it.

He nods. "Jimmy."

"Jimmy?" I ask.

He nods again.

"You named him Jimmy?"

"Uh huh. Jimmy."

"Jimmy bear. I like that."

"It looks like the local paparazzi is gone. I'm going to go throw the chicken on."

Gail follows me into the kitchen. "You know Gail, I feel like I spend my entire life waiting to find out if my family is alive or not." I complain as I grab the chicken from the marinade and fling it onto the plate. "I thought I'd die when Charlie Tango crashed and we didn't know if Christian was dead or alive. Then it ripped my heart out when I didn't know where Teddy was when that bitch took him last year. When Christian was shot it was days before we found out if he was going to make it. Then the Colombia thing was pure hell and now he and my son ..and Jason are God only knows where on Lake Washington. I have no idea if they are just stranded somewhere or dead or kidnapped." I can't keep my chin from beginning to tremble as I try to keep the tears from falling. "If Christian Grey is alive, I'm going to kill him when he gets home. He had better never mention not taking security with me ever again."

I can't hold the tears back any longer. "Gail my baby is missing. He's out there in the dark in that water somewhere."

"Now. Stop thinking like that." Gail gives me a hug as she fights her own tears. " You know Mr. Grey won't let anything happen to him and Jason won't let anything happen to either one of them." She gives my back a rub as I bury my head on her shoulder. "Mr. Grey would give his life for Teddy."

"I know. I suppose I should call Christian's parents, but I hate to worry them. They haven't really been missing that long."

"We don't know how long they've been missing. They've been out since this morning."

"Oh, thanks. Now I really feel better." I back off and grab a paper towel to wipe my eyes.

I feel my phone vibrate then ring and quickly retrieve it from my pocket. "Mrs. Grey."

"Ana? Have you heard from Christian?" I hear but I don't recognize the voice.

"Not yet. Who is this?" I ask.

"We were concerned and just wondered if the boat has made it back yet."

"I asked, who are you?" I repeat.

"It's Don."

"Don who?"

"I'm a friend of Christian's. I heard his boat was late getting in and I was concerned."

That's odd because Christian has so few friends, if any really, and I certainly haven't heard him mention any Don. "Look. Mr. Grey doesn't know anyone named Don."

"Mrs. Grey. Mrs. Grey. Don't hang up. Can you tell me anything? Please can you tell me what's going on?"

"Fucking reporters." I hang up. "I don't know how they got this number."

"If Mr. Grey can find information I guess anyone can. If it's out there, it can be found." Gail huffs.

I put the phone back in its place and grab the plate of chicken making my way to the patio after checking to see if the sky is clear of helicopters.

While I place the chicken on the hot grill, I feel my phone again. This time I look to see who is calling. It's Grace. Shit. I should have called her sooner. I just hated to worry her.

"Grace?"

"Ana. What's going on?"

"With Christian?" I ask knowing the answer.

"Of course with Christian. We just heard the local news break in and report that his boat is missing and that the Coast Guard is looking for him."

"Yes. Sort of. I mean…..he and Teddy went out on the boat this morning. They were supposed to be home hours ago, but we haven't heard anything. Security said that there is an emergency signal coming from the boat. That's all I know right now." I tell her." Teddy and Christian are on the boat with Mac and Jason. The helicopter has been dispatched and the Coast Guard is also homing in on the beacon. We should know something shortly."

"Ana why didn't you call us?"

"Well we haven't known very long. There is a chance nothing is wrong and I just didn't want to worry you until we knew something for sure."

"Darling I know you must be in shreds, but he is our son. Of course we would want to know something before we heard it on the news."

"I….I'm sorry Grace. The press just got hold of it so quickly. Honestly, I just haven't had time. I mean things have just been happening so quickly and I've been busy with security and the kids and…." Stop making excuses and just apologize. "I'm sorry, Grace. I should have called sooner."

"I know you're worried sick. Carrick and I can be right over."

I want to tell her not to, but it's the least I can do. "Thank you. That would be nice. Have you eaten? I was just putting some chicken on the grill for Grace and Tommy."

"No we haven't dear, but I couldn't eat a bite. Don't worry about us. We'll see you in about twenty minutes."

"Okay Grace."

"Ana?"

"Yes."

"Call as soon as you hear anything."

"Yes, Grace. I will."

Damn. I knew I should have called her. Carrick will be on me about that now. Too late to change it. Where the fuck are Christian and Teddy? It's been dark for ages. They should have found them by now.

"Gail?" I call as I walk back in the house.

"Yes? Was that Mr. Grey?" she asks.

"No. I'm afraid it was Mr. Grey's parents. They heard a news report and they are on the way over."

"Oh. Is there enough chicken? Do I need to throw more potatoes in?" she asks.

"I doubt they'll eat anything, but maybe we can stretch things just in case. Maybe stuff the potatoes or something."

I feel my phone again and reach deep into my jeans pocket and pull it out. "Crap. I don't recognize the number. It's probably the press again." I exit the call and put my phone back.

"I'll check the grill." My phone vibrates again and I check it. Same number as last time so I exit the call. Before I can get my phone in my pocket again it vibrates and rings again. The number is the same. I start to exit again, but it's strange that the same number would call three times. "Hello?"

"Ana?"

"CHRISTIAN!" I almost scream. Gail looks over with a big sigh of relief and a smile. "Where are you? Are you okay? Christian is Teddy okay? Where is he?" I can't stop asking questions.

"Hey. Hold on. Take a breath. We're all okay."

"Where are you? What happened?"

"We are on a Coast Guard cutter on the way back to the marina. We are all okay and we'll be home in a while. I just wanted to call and let you know."

"Christian, what happened? I've been out of my mind."

"I know. I'm sorry, Sweetheart. After the Charlie Tango debacle I learned to borrow a phone and give you a call."

"I'm glad you did. Gail and I have been frantic. Your parents are on the way over."

"Damn. There's nothing to worry about. Everything is okay. I'll explain it all when we get home."

"It's been on the news. That's how your parents found out."

"Fuck. Okay. Look I'm on a Coast Guard phone. I can't talk too long. We can talk about it when we get in. I've got to go babe. I love you."

"Christian is Taylor with you?"

"Yeah. He's right here."

"I'm sure Gail would like to say 'hello'."

I can here in the background. "Hey. Taylor. Come talk to your wife."

"Here Gail." I hand her the phone. "It's Jason." I can see the relief on her face when she hears his voice.

"Oh, Jason. We were so worried, Sweetheart. Are you sure you're okay?" "Yes. We're fine. Now that I know you're alright." "Yes. Okay. Just get home, Mr. Taylor." "I love you too."

Gail hands me my phone and we give each other a hug. Suddenly I remember the grill and rush out to rescue my really done chicken.

Since everything is ready and it's getting late, we decide to go ahead and feed Grace and Tommy. "Come on kids. Dinner is ready." The two of them come running; Tommy with Jimmy and Grace with her tiara. We get them situated and their plates filled with grilled lemon chicken and buttered baked potatoes. Gail has steamed some broccoli and made a cheese sauce for it.

"Mama? Where is Daddy?" Grace asks.

"He's on the way, sweetheart. He and Teddy got held up, but they will be here soon. You should see him before time for bed."

"Is Teddy comin' too?" Tommy asks.

"Yes. Sweetie, Teddy is with Christian. They'll both be home."

I continue to sip my wine as I watch the kids eat. I'm too wound up to eat a bite. The doorbell rings and Gail goes to answer it. "Keep your seat Gail. It's your day off, Remember?"

When I get to the door it is Grace and Carrick. "Hi. You two got here quick." I give them both a kiss and a hug.

"Like to have never gotten past all the reporters at the front gate. Have you heard anything?" Carrick asks.

"Actually, yes. Christian just called. The Coast Guard found them and they are on the way home."

"They're okay then?" he asks.

I nod. "Yes, I have no idea what happened. He said he'd go into it when he got home."

"Oh thank God." Grace about collapses leaning against Carrick.

"Can I get you anything?" I ask.

"I could use a scotch." Carrick says.

"Carry, go fix it yourself. You know where everything is. Ana is stressed out enough." Grace is dabbing the tears from her eyes.

"Anything for you dear?" he asks Grace.

"No. I'm fine. I'm going to see my grandchildren." Grace walks over to the dining area off of the family room and pours herself a glass of the open wine on the way. I follow her over. "Grace I was going to call, but I've just heard from Christian."

"I'm just glad they are alright. My poor heart is getting too old for all of this." She says as she sips her wine. "Didn't he have any security with him?"

"No, he decided not to. It was sort of a day for it to be just Christian and Teddy." I try to explain. "Taylor was with them."

"One day that child is going to kill me." I can see a few tears still seeping from the corners of her eyes.

"Can I get you anything? We were just feeding Grace and Tommy."

"No thank you dear. How is Tommy doing?"

"He's fine. Gail and I took him and Grace shopping today. He got some toys and some new clothes. Grace got a few things too. But he's doing well on his medicines and we've about got him potty trained."

"Oh, that's good. Let me go see my granddaughter."

Grace walks over to the dining table. "Ga'ma. Grace squeals." Her grandmother walks up behind her taking her head in her hands kissing the top of it.

"Hello sweetheart. How's my granddaughter today?"

"I got shicken." She looks up at Grace. "Yes. I see. It looks good."

"Tommy how are you dear?" Grace runs her hand over his head.

"Tommy? Do you remember Doctor Grace? Remember she gave you the truck?" Tommy looks her over and doesn't seem to be too sure about her, but he gives us a nod.

"Hello, Gail. How are you?" Grace says to Mrs. Taylor as Gail helps little Grace wipe her mouth and hands.

"Fine Mrs. Grey. Thank you."

About that time Carrick walks in with his drink and kisses little Grace. "Hello my beautiful girl."

Grace beams up at him. "Gampa."

"And this must be Tommy." He moves to touch Tommy only to have him cower. Carrick quickly retracts his hand and gives him a warm smile instead.

"You finish eating. Carry and I will just have a seat in here on the sofa." With that she and Carrick walk into the family room and have a seat to wait on their son.

They don't have to wait too long. Helping Tommy and Grace down from the table, I hear the front door open. When I look around I see three tired, rough looking men walk through.

"TEDDY!" I scream and I run to the foyer and grab him up in my arms. I can't help but break down when I finally have him next to me. I can't hold back my tears anymore as I plant quick kisses all over his face and stop momentarily to inspect him. "Baby, are you okay?"

"Mom. Mom, I'm okay." Teddy crinkles his face trying to avoid all the attention. "Stop."

"We're all okay." Christian offers. "I mean if it matters that we're ALL okay."

I look over at him. "It matters."

Carrick and Grace aren't far behind me. They both fall all over Teddy touching him and making sure he's in one piece.

Taylor has made his way to Gail and she has a death grip on him. Looking over at them I holler, "Gail. Taylor. Go home." They give me a quick smile and head out the door arm in arm poor Gail is in tears.

"I'm fine. Don't worry." Christian says reminding us that he is there. Carrick and Grace each give him a bear hug and Grace takes hold not turning him loose.

Grace comes running in accompanied by her tiara and pink princess dress. "Daddy! You home." When she reaches Christian he releases his mother and picks up his daughter and gives her big hug and kiss. "Yes. Sweetie. We made it home."

I pick Teddy up and head toward the family room. "Come on everyone. Let's go sit down. I need to make sure everyone is alright." I use my shoulders to wipe my cheeks and sit down on the sofa still clinging to my son, and I set him in my lap. Christian sits next to me with Grace in his lap. As he does I reach over and pull his head to me giving him a kiss. "Are you okay?" I whisper.

"Yep. Just tired."

"You scared the shit out of me." I whisper again.

"Sorry. I'll explain."

Tommy is clutching Jimmy and appears a bit confused by all the ruckus. He timidly walks over to us and gently puts his palm on Christian's knee and pats is a couple of times. Christian looks down at him. "Cwisten home." Tommy says as he looks up at Christian.

Christian gives him a smile and puts his arm around his little shoulders pulling him over to him. "Yes, Tommy. Christian's home."

Grace and Carrick sit in chairs opposite us. "Well son, what in the world happened?" Carrick asks.


	70. Chapter 70

_**Fifty Shades…Full Circle**_

_**Chapter 70**_

"Yes for heaven's sake. What happened? Where were you? Why didn't you call me?" I ask. I still haven't released Teddy. I may never release Teddy. I may go to college with Teddy.

"I'm trying, Sweetheart." Christian almost whispers as he puts his arm around my shoulder. Jack jumps up on the sofa between Christian and me and is about to wiggle his tail off. "Down. Down Jack." Jack jumps up and starts licking Christian's ear with genuine affection. "Jack. Stop." Christian gently pushes him off the sofa and wipes his ear on his shoulder.

"It was my fault." Teddy pouts.

"No, son. It was not your fault." Christian reassures him.

"Yes it was. I dropped it." Teddy argues with his dad.

"Teddy. I've told you, that had nothing to do with it."

"Christian. What?" I insist.

"I'm trying to get it out. Okay?" He growls. "We were out on the lake and decided it was such a nice day it would be great to head out to the sound. So we headed up the canal to get to the sound. When we got to Salmon Bay we had to go through the locks."

"Yeah, Mom. You shoulda' seen it. It was great. You go in and they close the doors and water runs out in like in a bathtub and the boat goes way down." He lowers his arm to demonstrate the water draining out of the lock. "Then when they open the gate at the other end the boat is at the same height as the other side."

"Anyway. Teddy got excited and he wanted to call you to tell you about it. So I gave him my phone. While he was dialing, the boat lurched and he dropped the phone. Over the edge. Into the water."

"Yeah. It was my fault." He looks so remorseful.

I give his forehead a kiss, "No it wasn't your fault baby."

"So, we were down a phone, but we still had Taylor's phone and the phone on the boat and the radio. So we were on the sound for a couple of hours and for some reason all of a sudden the electrical system went down. Everything. Down. Off. Nothing. No lights, no radio no phone, no steering. Dead in the water. Mac and I worked on it for about an hour and we couldn't find out what was causing it.

"Finally I just told him to quit worrying and we'd call for a tow back in and dry dock it to have it worked on. My phone was gone and the phone on the boat wasn't functioning. The radio was dead. So Taylor grabbed his phone to call a tow and his phone was dead. The battery had run down."

"That's not like Taylor to not have his phone on a full charge." I add.

"We're trying a new GPS program and the add- on seems to be depleting the batteries more quickly. Anyway his was dead. We had no way to call for a tow. I had no way to call you. I.."

"What about Mac? Didn't he have a phone?" I ask.

"Mac doesn't believe in cell phones."

"What do you mean, doesn't believe in cell phones? He thinks they are like unicorns and mermaids and don't really exist or what?" I ask dripping with sarcasm.

"Mac never has carried a phone. He refused to carry one. That will change. He will be given a standard GEH cell phone fully equipped with GPS and from now on, he will carry it." Christian sounds authoritative. "So we were virtually cut off. Just drifting in the sound. We tried flagging down passing boats, but couldn't attract anyone. It was getting late and the sun was going down, so we turned on the emergency beacon. I knew security would pick it up, as well as the Coast Guard."

"Son wasn't that dangerous? I mean no steering, adrift in the sound. You could have been hit by any number of larger boats that use that water. After dark they wouldn't have been able to see you." Carrick asks as he sips his drink.

Looking over I see Christian give his dad a stern look. "We were fine Dad. Once we turned on the beacon, it didn't take the Coast Guard long to get there. They brought us in and then we'll have the Grace towed in for repairs."

"Goodness I don't even like to think about it. Adrift out there in the dark". Grace shivers.

"But why didn't you have security following you?" Carrick asks.

"Yes, why didn't you?" I glare over at him.

"Because, Teddy wanted to spend the day with just the two of us. I had to have Mac and Taylor. I was just trying to pare it down as much as possible. Besides I thought we'd be fine on the boat."

I want to kill him for not taking security with him, but I don't want to say anything in front of Teddy. I don't want to scare him making him think that he was in any danger. Christian and I will discuss this later. I pull Teddy back in my lap like a baby and repeatedly kiss his head and stroke his hair.

"Mo- om. I'm not a baby." He tries to wiggle out of my lap.

"Hush. You're my baby. Just sit still for a while." I strengthen my hold on him as he huffs and resigns himself to my attention.

"Daddy, I got a cwown." Grace grins at Christian and adjusts her headpiece, evidently needing a little attention.

"So I see. Are those real diamonds?" he asks.

"Uh huh." She nods. "I a reaw pinsess."

"Sweetheart, you've always been a real princess." Christian hugs her and gives her a big wet kiss on her cheek.

"Jimmy." Tommy holds up his bear for Christian to see. Jack keeps jumping up and nipping at the stuffed animal trying to steal it. "No." Tommy shakes his head. "No doggie."

"Come here." Christian smiles over at the little blonde boy. Tommy moves closer to Christian who asks if he can see the teddy bear. Tommy willingly gives it to Christian. "That's a fine bear. Did you name him Jimmy?"

Tommy nods. "Uh, huh. Jimmy." Christian picks Tommy up and sits him in between us. "There." Tommy snuggles in clutching Jimmy.

"Have you eaten?" I ask.

"No. I imagine Teddy's pretty hungry. He had some hot chocolate on the cutter after we were picked up, but that's all."

"How about you?"

My phone rings and I look to see who it is. "It's Mia. I'll get it."

"Mia?"

"Ana. We just heard the news. We were out to dinner and just got back. We heard Christian's boat was missing."

"They have been rescued. They're home and fine. Do you want to talk to him?"

"Oh, thank God. Yes let me talk to him."

I hand him the phone. "Here. Your sister wants to talk to you."

Christian rolls his eyes. "Careful. Mr. Grey. You're in enough trouble."

Christian frowns and points to himself as he mouths 'me?' as he takes the phone from me.

"Sis?" "Yes. We're fine." "I know. It was just Teddy and me. And of course Taylor and Mac." "No. The electrical system went down and we were out of communication for a bit, but we're fine." "Yes. Well how are you liking it?" "Good." "Yes I'm sure we'd love to come see it. Just let us know. I'm sure it's beautiful." "Okay. You and Ana figure out the plans and I'll be there." "Okay. Love you too." "Here's Ana."

He hands me the phone. "Here. Mia wants us to come see the new house. You two can work it out."

"What am I your social secretary?" I ask sarcastically.

"Yep." He replies as I take the phone.

"Hey sweetie. How are you feeling?" I ask her.

"Fine. Tired. Excited. Liz has the house looking spectacular. Thanks for recommending her."

"Good. I knew you'd love her. We can't wait to see it."

"How about next Saturday evening. I'll invite everyone. We'll have a housewarming."

"Sounds great. Grace and Carrick are here; I'll let them know. Call me later with the address and the time."

"Okay. Ana, I know you must have been worried sick. I'm glad they're back safe and sound."

"Yes. It's been a long afternoon and evening. Take care and we'll talk later in the week."

Looking over at Grace. "Mia wants us all over next Saturday to see the house. Have you seen it?"

"Yes. I saw it after they purchased it. I haven't seen it since the remodel."

"Hmm. Who did they buy it from? Do you know?" I ask her.

"I have no idea. I think it was from some estate, but don't quote me on it."

"Well. I'd better get some dinner heated up for you two." I give Teddy one last squeeze and a big kiss.

"Potty?" Tommy asks.

"You need to go potty sweetie?"

"Uh, huh." He nods.

"I'll take him." Grace offers and she walks over taking Tommy by the hand leading him to the bathroom. I slide Teddy off of my lap and walk to the kitchen to heat up some food for my two men. As I'm putting the chicken into the microwave to heat it, I hear footsteps and look around to see Christian. I want to melt into him I want to kiss him and hold him. I want to cry I'm so relieved he's home.

"Are you mad at me?" he asks.

"Why would you think that?" I ask still trying to get their dinner ready.

"You haven't said two words to me since we walked in the door. You kissed all over Teddy."

"Christian. I was worried that's all. It's been an awful afternoon."

He walks over and puts his arms around my waist and presses his mouth to my neck. Without thinking I drop what I'm doing and turn into him wrapping my arms around his neck. He gives me a half smile just before bending down and meeting my lips with his. Before I can stop my mouth opens to his and his tongue dances with mine as his hands drop to cup my butt. His palms feel so warm and familiar as they slide over and caress my cheeks then slide up my back. I can feel my body relax in his arms as he pulls me tighter to him.

Our lips break momentarily. "That's better." He whispers against my mouth.

"You had me so worried. I've been through hell this afternoon." I murmur as I cling to him. Looking up into his eyes I run my hand through his hair. "I need to get your dinner warmed."

"All I need is you."

I nod my head against his chest. "I need you too." I exhale. "But I know Teddy's hungry and it's getting late."

"Ana…..I didn't mean to worry you. We were fine."

Turning around to resume my kitchen duties, "Yes. But I didn't know that. I thought my son was at the bottom of Lake Washington or…"

"Or what?"

"Or worse." I stop and sigh. "Look. Let me get this done and we can talk about it after your parents are gone and the kids are in bed."

"Okay." He kisses my hair. "I love you." And rubs his hand up and down my upper arms.

"I know. I love you too."

Grace and Carrick leave and I get Christian and Teddy fed. After that we get the kids to bed. Christian gets Grace down and I get Tommy bathed and in his Spiderman pajamas. He has his bed loaded with all the toys he got today, the bear, a few new cars and trucks, Legos, several coloring books and of course the plastic truck Grace gave him.

"Monday we are going to get you a new bed." I tell him as I tuck him in and sit on the edge of the bed next to him.

"A new bed?"

"Yep. This one is so big, you get lost in it."

"But I wike dis bed. Is my bed."

"Wouldn't you like a bed just your size and maybe a Spiderman comforter and sheets?"

He nods. "Yesth. I would wike dat."

I give him a kiss on his forehead and turn out his light. "Okay, buster. Time to close your eyes and go to sleep. You've had a big day."

He holds out his bear. "Jimmy needs kisth too."

"Okay." I give the toy a kiss on its nose. "Good night Jimmy. Now both of you go to sleep."

"An? When I get to see mama?" he asks.

"Soon I hope, Sweetie. Pretty soon."

"Ukay." With that he hugs Jimmy and rolls over to go to sleep.

I walk down to Teddy's room and Christian is just getting his pajamas out for him. I give him a hug and kiss his head. "Your hair is still wet. Come here." I grab a towel and buff it over his head.

"Gee Mom. Don't rub my head off." He growls at me.

Christian hands me his pajamas, "Here. I'll let you get him to bed."

"Thanks." I whisper to him.

"Here are your bottoms." I hand him the bottom to his PJs. After he has those pulled up I hold out the top and he pokes his arms into the sleeves. I turn him around and kneel down to button him up.

"Mom. I was fine today. Dad wouldn't let anything happen to me."

"I know sweetie. I know your dad will always take care of you. I was just worried when I couldn't find you. I don't like not knowing where you are."

"But I can take care of myself. I'm gettin' big."

"Yes. I know you're getting big. But I've told you over and over again, you'll always be my baby, no matter what."

I pull him into my arms. "I love you so much Theodore Raymond Grey. You just can't imagine how much."

"I know. I love you too, Mom."

I nod toward the bed. "Come on. Bedtime." He jumps up into the bed and I pull his covers up and sit next to him as I run my fingers through his hair. "Did you have a good time with your dad?"

"Uh, huh. We did men stuff."

I have to snicker, "What kind of men stuff?"

"Mac taught me how to pee off the side of the boat."

"Oh he did?"

"Yep, but Dad said I shouldn't do it. He said it wasn't proper for a young man to do that."

"Yes. I can hear him saying that." I smile down at him.

"He talked to me about learning the piano. He said I could learn drums as long as I learned piano too."

"Well, that's quite a concession for your father."

"I talked to him about Tommy, like you told me to."

"You did? What did he say?"

"He said that Tommy's mother was sick and she hadn't been very nice to him. He said that Tommy and his mom were poor and that he didn't have all the stuff we have and that I should remember that and not make fun of him. He said it's not Tommy's fault that he doesn't know stuff."

"He's right, you know."

"He said he knew a little boy like that a long time ago, that's how he knew how Tommy felt."

"Oh. I see."

"Who did he know like that, Mom?"

"He didn't tell you?"

"Uh uh."

"Well, maybe when you get older he'll tell you all about it."

"Why do I always have to wait until I get older?"

"It will come soon enough, Sweetheart. One day you'll know everything. But right now, you need to close those eyes and go to sleep." I lean in and give him a big kiss. "Tomorrow I want you to tell me all about the Coast Guard boat."

"I will. It was fun. They let me wear a Coast Guard life jacket and let me go up to the wheel house and…"

"Tomorrow. Go to sleep." I kiss him again and tuck him in before turning out his light and leaving. I walk back down the hall to our bedroom and Christian is already in his pajama bottoms sitting on the sofa watching TV. God he looks good. Everything on his body is still where it's supposed to be….and firm.

"Teddy in bed?"

"Yes. What are you watching?" I walk over and flop down next to him.

"Just catching up on the news. Seems I've been found safe and sound."

I chuckle. "Well I'm glad."

"Are you?" he asks.

"Christian? What a question. Of course I am."

"Sweetheart. What's wrong? Why are you angry?" he asks me.

"I…I'm angry that you took Teddy out on the boat without security. Christian something awful could have happened to him."

"I was taking care of him. Besides, this coming from the master at eluding a security detail?"

"Christian I have never ever left this house with the children without a security detail in tow. I may have tried to ditch my own, but never with the children."

He turns to face me folding his knee under him. "Ana, do you think that I would ever jeopardize the children's safety?"

"Christian. I'm just saying that security should have been with you today."

"How dare you think I would put Teddy at risk. I was with him. I was taking care of him. I am capable of taking care of my son. Ana. It wasn't my fault that the electrical system went out. No one could have foreseen that. Mac and I worked …"

"Christian I know that. I'm not blaming you for the electrical system going out. Just for not taking security."

"So you do blame me then?"

I get up and stomp off to my dressing room. "I'm not blaming you for anything."

"Then why are you so fucking mad?"

"I've told you why. I don't want to rehash it. Just don't do it again."

"What?" He gets up and follows me to my dressing room. Standing in the doorway he watches as I slide out of my jeans. "He's my son too and I'll take him any God damned place I choose. I don't need your fucking permission to do it either."

I grab my T-shirt and pull it over my head. "As long as he is my son you do. And stop looking at my boobs."

"I'm not looking at your fucking tits. I see 'em every damn day. I know what they look like. And for your information, Teddy enjoyed himself today."

"Christian I'm sure he did." I take my bra off and toss it in the clothes bin. "That's not the point."

"What is the fucking point? That is if you even have one." I slide my panties off and toss them as well.

"Do you have to watch me undress?" I fume.

"Since when can't I watch you undress? It's not some national secret. I've watched you undress every night for over eight years. I know what you look like better than you do."

"I'm just saying that, we are having an argument and I'd rather that you not watch me take my clothes off."

He looks at me with his face wrinkled. "What the fuck are you talking about?"

I slip my lavender silk gown over my head and let it fall into place. "Never mind. I'm dressed now." I spit as I walk past him and turn out the light. I stomp in the bathroom and begin to aggressively brush my teeth. Christian follows me in trying to continue our conversation.

"Were you not the least bit concerned about me today?" he asks.

I garble something to him with the brush in my mouth as I hold my hair back.

"What?"

Stopping I look over at him. "I said I'm brushing my teeth and can't talk." I spit in the sink and rinse. Then throw water on my face and grab a towel to dry it.

"Are you finished now?"

"Yes." I walk toward the bed and begin to grab the throw pillows. Christian follows and grabs a handful and throws them across the room.

"Well that was childish. Someone will just have to go pick them up."

"I don't give a fuck. I'll throw every god damn pillow in this fucking house if I feel like it."

I throw the comforter down. "Suit yourself." I get in bed and face toward my side pulling the covers up to my chin. "Turn out the lights please."

"God damn…fucking…."

"What?" I ask.

"I'm talking to myself. If I had wanted you to hear I would have spoken to you." He grumbles as he flips off the TV and then the overhead light. He stomps over to the bed and gets in leaning against the headboard. He puts on his computer glasses and picks up his laptop opening it.

"What are you doing?" I look behind me at him.

"I'm doing something pleasurable and calming. Work." He begins to tap on the keyboard.

Lying back down I punch my pillow. "I can't sleep with you pounding on that thing." I growl.

"Too. Fucking. Bad." He responds.

The day finally gets to me and as hard as I try I can't stop the tears that need to fall.  
Thinking about my son and my husband being hurt or dead is just so overwhelming and unbearable. I can feel my shoulders begin to tremble and my chest heave as I cover my mouth trying to stifle the sound. In an instant I feel Christian grab my waist and pull me over into his lap. "Come here." I pull my knees up and lean against his chest and begin to sob. "Don't cry baby. Everything is alright." He reassures me as he strokes my hair.

"I thought you were dead. I thought Teddy was dead." I thought I had lost you both." I sob.

"You can't get rid of me. And as long as I'm around, I'll make sure Teddy is safe." He takes his glasses off and sets them on the table. "You don't have to worry."

"Of course I worry. Christian we didn't know where you were. How was I supposed to know you were safe? I would die without Teddy." He takes my chin in his hand and lifts my face. "I couldn't survive without you."

"I'm not that easy to get rid of. But it's nice to know you care." He smiles and uses his fingers to wipe the tears from my cheeks.

I put my arm around his neck. "Asshole."

He chuckles. "That's better. Can an asshole have a kiss?" With that he pulls me to him and presses his mouth to mine. His lips are soft and familiar as they move over mine. His tongue glides over my bottom lip and I open my mouth to welcome it. As I do he pulls me tighter to him and his hand moves down to cup my breast underneath the lavender silk.

As our lips break, I whisper against him, "I thought I'd lost you. I can't keep wondering if you're dead every time you're out of my sight."

"Shhh. We'll talk about it tomorrow. Right now I need you." His fingers tug at my now erect nipple through the silk.

"I need you too. Christian you have no idea how much I do need you." I whisper as I look into his gray eyes.

"I have a good idea." He bends down and takes my mouth again devouring it as his hand slides underneath my gown and traces the curves of my calf up over my hip and finally resting on my breast. His warm fingers gently knead and massage the flesh. His mouth leaves mine and I feel myself moan as he bends down and takes the now hard nipple in his mouth…


	71. Chapter 71

_**Fifty Shades…Full Circle**_

_**Chapter 71**_

"I have a good idea." He bends down and takes my mouth again devouring it as his hand slides underneath my gown and traces the curves of my calf up over my hip finally resting on my breast. His warm fingers gently knead and massage the flesh. His mouth leaves mine and I feel a moan escape as he bends down and takes the now hard nipple in his mouth. The warmth of his tongue sends a wave of chills over my skin as he nips with his teeth and pulls at it teasing and torturing it.

The comfort of his lap is broken by his now growing erection beneath me. I sit up and pull the hem of my gown over my head leaving me naked before him. "May I look at your tits now?" he grumbles. Turning to face him I lift myself and straddle his lap. "Yes. You may look at my tits now." I whisper as I bend forward and gently press my lips to the skin just beneath his ear. His hands move up and he contains both of my breasts in them; his warm palms pressing against them and massaging them until they are heavy and needy.

"God they're so soft." He exhales. "You're so soft and so warm."

His head falls back as I continue to kiss and whisper against his neck. "They're all yours. Everything I have is yours."

With that he moves his hands and circles my waist pulling me to him. I gently begin to rock my hips back and forth rubbing against his full manhood and I can feel it twitch against me beneath the cotton pajama pants.

"Fuck. Let me get out of these." He growls as he lifts his hips and yanks his bottoms down first one side and then the other until his erection is free. My hair falls around both us as I lower my head to meet his mouth again and then lower my hips until I feel him at my opening. Taking him in my hand he feels so warm, so firm, so ready. I move my palm up and down his erection before stroking the tip over my wet flesh to position it beneath me. Then I begin to slowly lower myself on to him. As a reflex I gasp as he begins to gently slip inside.

"Oh fuck that feels good." He growls and takes my hips gently guiding me down farther. "That's it baby. All the way." He whispers as I slowly allow him to fill me. When I can go no farther I gently rock my hips forward against him. "Oh fuck. That's right." He growls as he cups my head and pulls it down to his until our mouths meet. Cupping his head in my palms I search his face and continue to rock in his lap as I feel him grow inside me. "You're so fucking incredible." I murmur and stroke his cheeks with my thumbs as he gently thrusts in and out facilitated by a generous amount of my arousal.

"Oh, God Christian." I gasp as I let my head fall back. Gathering my hair in his hand he wraps it around his wrist then tugs on it pulling my head back. He slides his tongue down my neck continuing down to circle and lick an erect nipple. His hips now rock to meet mine as he thrusts up to fill me and then retreat, only to enter once again. "Hold on," he whispers as he releases my hair and in a single motion he moves me on to the mattress on my back as he follows, never leaving me. My thighs fall open for him as he props on his knees between them never missing a thrust. He finds my now excited, erect spot just above his penetration and he begins to massage it with the pad of his thumb as our hips continue to separate and come together again in unison.

"That's right. God you're so beautiful. So beautiful," he murmurs as he looks down at me writhing below him.

"God Christian. I need you." I exhale. My hands grasp my breasts and they massage and knead as Christian continues to thrust.

"I know baby. I know." He growls back as he continues to work his hips and his fingers. "God I can feel you. Let me see you. I want to watch you come. I want to feel you come. I know you're ready."

I can feel it with every thrust and every pass of his thumb. I'm so close to surrender. So close to losing myself in him. My belly is quivering as he continues to fuck. I can't last much longer as he coaxes me to give myself to him. My body is pushing higher and farther until finally my senses know nothing but the point where we come together. "Oh, fuck, Christian." I almost scream as he continues to push me until I reach the top. I hang there for a moment waiting, until finally I fall over the edge.

"That's it. That's my girl." He growls down at me as my belly trembles and my back arches. My breathing stops as the fire rips through me and I feel myself tighten around him. "Jesus that feels good," he snarls. For a brief instant the world fades away and my body is all I know. I reach up for him and grabbing his shoulder I pull him down to me and into my arms. I wrap my legs around his hips as he continues to thrust.

"I love you. Oh, God I love you." I whisper as I begin to regain my senses. Christian looks down searching my face as he continues to roll his hips and thrust faster and harder. He lowers his head until his lips meet mine and I devour him. "Come on baby. Come for me. I need for you to." I whisper against his mouth. I can see the desperation in his eyes as he races to his release. His breathing is ragged and his skin is wet with perspiration. His hair is falling over his forehead and he is panting as he finally thrusts deep and tenses.

"Aggg, Fuck, Baby." He snarls as his skin flushes and his veins distend. His face wrinkles and his eyes squeeze closed as he begins to tremble and shudder above me. I can feel his erection twitch and jerk inside me releasing the product of his orgasm. Pulling him down to me I envelope him in my arms as he finishes and begins to breath and relax against me. "Oh, fuck." He gasps against my neck trying to catch his breath. "Oh, shit."

"I know. " I gasp in return.

"I need to get lost more often." He pants.

"Get lost again and this will be the last fuck you ever get." I pant back at him and smile. We both chuckle as he rolls off and onto his back. I follow him crawling on his chest with my knee between his thighs and he softly rubs his hand up and down my back.

"I love you Ana Grey."

"And I love you, Christian Grey."

We lie like that for what seems an eternity until I quickly shiver and snuggle against him. "Cold baby?" he asks as he pulls the sheet up over me.

"Just a little. Only my butt." I move off to lie beside him leaving a pool of the remains of our lovemaking that has seeped out on to his thigh.

"Yuck. Get that off my leg." He growls.

"What?"

"It's wet."

"So? Half of it is yours. I'm just giving it back." I giggle.

"I don't want it back. I gave it to you."

Using the sheet I wipe his moist leg for him. "There. Big baby. I don't know what you're griping about. Half the time you have it in your mouth. You never seem to gripe then."

"That's different."

"Really? You ought to try sleeping in it a night or two."

"I have no intention of sleeping it. It's my gift to you. Do with it what you want, I just don't want it back."

"Well you could go get a towel, since you were so nice to deposit it with me."

"Oh for fuck sake." He throws the cover off and gets up on his knees picking me up in his arms.

"What are you doing?" I squeal. He walks across to the edge of the bed on his knees then steps off onto the floor. "Christian! Don't drop me."

"I'm not going to fucking drop you." He grumbles as he walks to the bathroom with me stopping to toss me up and get a firmer hold on me. Once in the bathroom he stands me in the tub and turns on the warm water, then removes the hand held shower head and, after testing the water he gently runs it between my thighs using his other hand to rub and massage the area clean.

I quietly gasp at the touch of the warm water and his fingers between my thighs. I can tell by the look on his face that he realizes the effect the little shower has on me. "Like that?" he grins.

"Thanks. I wasn't expecting a bath when I asked for a towel." I go to move and Christian continues to move the warm spray over me. He steps over into the tub and sits on the edge as he continues to 'bathe' the area. Without warning he slips two fingers inside and circles them thrusting them in and out. "Oh, Fuck Christian. I'm tired." I complain.

"Want me to stop?" he grins.

"No." I almost whimper as I place my hands on his shoulders for support. The feel of the warm water pulsing on me combined with his fingers is about to drive me insane as my belly trembles and shudders. "Christian. I. I."

"What baby?" he smiles.

Once again he is pushing me to the edge. The water, his fingers; it's all so intense. "Oh, Shit." I cry as my fingers dig into his shoulders and I fold forward resting my head on his. Just as I start to come, Christian moves the water control with his foot causing it to run cold. "OH FUCK!" I almost scream. My walls tighten around his fingers, pulling and releasing. The now cold water continues to pulse against me and Christian's fingers continue to thrust until I can't support myself any longer. "Christian." I cry as I fall forward. He catches me dropping the water and pulling me into his arms. He lowers me to my knees and I rest my head against his thigh as I try to regain my senses. "Oh, Baby, why do you do that to me?" I whimper as he strokes my hair.

"Because you like it as much as I do." He half chuckles. "You are one depraved woman Mrs. Grey."

"I am what you made me." I snort.

"Sweetheart, I'd like to take credit for it, but you came by it honestly I'm afraid."

"Mmm. Good thing I found you then."

"Best stroke of luck I've ever had." He grins down at me moving my hair off of my face.

As I pry my eyes open, his erection fills my field of vision. So pink, so hard, so wet and so close. Without saying a word I move and glide my tongue from his balls to the tip.

"Oh shit." He jumps.

"Mmmm" I moan as I take him in my hand and pull him into my mouth. I glide my tongue around and just under the tip stopping to flick my tongue on the underside of his shaft. I can hear him gasp. I have him where I want him. I move my mouth over him and begin to descend taking him in. It's never easy; he is so damn large sometimes I think I'll get lockjaw so I've become proficient with my tongue. Placing my hand around him just below my mouth I create a vacuum with my mouth as I pull off of him. "Oh fucking, God." He exhales as his head falls back and he grips the edge of the tub. Using my teeth I gently nibble the underside just below his head then gently massage the same area with my tongue. I can hear his breathing becoming ragged and irregular as I once again take him all the way in using one hand to extend the feeling of my mouth on him. His hips roll forward to meet my mouth as he begins to fuck. Taking his balls in my hand I massage and tumble them in my palm. I can feel them so soft as they gently move responding to his arousal.

"That's it," he gasps. "That's it baby." His hands twist in my hair as he gently thrusts. He almost begins to guide my head, but quickly stops as he knows this is the fastest way to lose a blow job. I begin to increase my speed; sucking, pulling, gliding. I can feel his body beginning to tremble. "I." "I'm gonna' come." He gasps. "I'm gonna' fucking come." I intensify my mouth fuck faster and harder letting him know that I'm ready. The strain in his voice is audible as he growls,"Ohfuckohfuckohfuck." With a last thrust I taste the peppery liquid as he once again gives me his non-returnable 'gift'. I quickly swallow trying to keep up with him as he shudders above me. After a few seconds I can hear him relax and his hand gently twists through my hair. As he begins to breathe, I continue to suck and pull and kiss. "No. No baby." He puts his hands on my head and pries my mouth from him. "Enough. Enough."

Grasping my upper arms in his hands he lifts me up to my knees and pulls me to him. He takes my mouth with his letting his tongue explore the mouth he just fucked. "God I love you." He whispers against me before taking my mouth again. "I really fucking love your ass."

With my arms around his neck my breasts press into his chest. His warm hands glide up and down my back and I can feel the last twitches of his arousal as it presses into my tummy. Our mouths separate and he pulls me tight burying his head in the crook of my neck. His breathing is audible and his breath warm against my skin as he clings to me.

"Sweetheart, I love you, but I need to get up." I sigh. "My knees are hurting." I can feel Christian softly chuckle and move back looking down at me.

He quickly kisses my nose and searches my face for a moment, before standing up and helping me to my feet. "Come on up." He leans over and turns on the water making sure it is warm then uses the sprayer to get us both cleaned up. I quickly jump out and grab a towel then toss one to him. Returning to the bedroom, I slip back into my gown and he decides to forego his pajama bottoms before we slide back into out bed. Christian turns out the lamp and I spoon in next to him exhausted and happy. My son is safe in his bed. My husband is here next to me and has made love to me. I'm happy and content and tired.

"Thank you." I whisper in the dark.

"For what?"

"For coming home. For bringing Teddy home. For being in my life."

"Mrs. Grey, I wouldn't have it any other way." He kisses my head." Thank you for being here for me to come home to." He presses his lips to my head and whispers, "And thanks for being able to suck the hell out of a dick."

I give him a quick swat. "You're hopeless."

"Yep. Pretty much."

It's all I can do to keep my eyes open and finally drift off clinging to my husband.

* * *

I slide back in to bed and snuggle next to Christian. "Is he asleep?" he asks.

"Yes." I let out a huge sigh. "Finally."

"Good." Christian pulls me close and envelopes me in his arms.

"I almost wish he could go back and be with Lorna. He misses her so much."

"Hopefully it will be soon. You're going to have him so spoiled he won't want to go back." Christian grumbles into my hair.

"I'm not spoiling him."

"Every time I turn around you've bought him something."

"Christian. All I've gotten him is some clothes and shoes and underwear."

"And toys."

"Well, all he had was that worn out truck that he got from your mother's waiting room."

"That's what I said. You're always buying him something." He snorts. "Just don't let him get used to it. When he goes back he won't get shopping trips on a weekly basis."

"Buying him a few things won't hurt anything." "While you're half awake….. I'm going to get my hair cut."

"Okay." He mumbles.

"No. I mean cut, not trimmed." I try to warn him.

"Short?"

"No. Not really short."

"How short?"

"Maybe about shoulder length. I know you like it long, but with my job and three kids and everything….well it's just a pain in the ass to try to deal with it."

"Will it be long enough to braid?" he almost sounds pitiful.

"Yes I think so."

"Long enough for me to grab hold of?"

"Yes. Christian. I'm not getting a buzz cut. I just need it shorter. I just need less hair to have to deal with."

"Well, I can't say I won't miss it, but it's your hair." I can feel him stroking it almost like he'll never see it again.

"Okay. I just wanted you to be forewarned, so you wouldn't get upset when you saw it."

"Okay." He snuggles into me and drifts off again.

* * *

"Mom." I hear Teddy whisper. "Mom."

"Hmmmmm?" I almost growl.

"Mom. Are you awake?"

"No." I snuggle in harder. "Get in the bed baby." With that, Teddy jumps up and crawls between Christian and me. Still mostly asleep, Christian rouses and turns over grabbing Teddy and pulling him close to spoon him.

"Mmmm. You're warm." He grumbles and kisses Teddy's hair. "You were something else last night. I think I might need a repeat this morning."

My eyes fly open and I turn over sitting up. "Christian." I snap. "Christian wake up."

"Mmmm?" he growls trying to open his eyes. "Teddy?"

"Are you awake yet Dad?" Teddy chirps as Christian tries to focus on him.

"I guess I am now." Christian's head falls back on his pillow. Christian pulls Teddy tighter and growls against his neck making Teddy giggle.

"Dad, I wanna' tell Mom about the Coast Guard boat."

"Okay, son. You tell her about the boat while I go to the bathroom." Christian gets out of bed yawning and scratching his head as he makes his way across the floor.

"DAD?"

"What son?" Christian stops to look at Teddy.

"Dad you got no pajamas on."

Christian tries to focus once again, "I must have forgotten them last night."

"Dad?" Teddy asks.

"Yes Teddy, what is it?" Christian sounds perturbed.

"What's that?" he asks timidly.

"What's what?" Christian asks.

I turn over to see what the conversation is about and want to die. Shit. I try to signal to Christian with my eyes, but it isn't working.

"That. Your penis looks funny."

Christian looks down at his morning erection flying at full staff. "Oh. Um. Well I. I just have to….. go to the bathroom." With that he turns around and continues to the bathroom.

"Mom? Why did Dad's penis look like that?"

"Ask your father later." I turn over and pull the covers back up. It's too early to try to deal with this sort of thing.

"I always have to wait."

"Yes Sweetheart. It's just part of growing up."

"Is that thing with Dad's penis part of growing up?"

"Yes, Baby. That's definitely part of growing up."


	72. Chapter 72

_**Fifty Shades…Full Circle**_

_**Chapter 72**_

Turning over I pull Teddy to me and kiss his neck. "I missed you last night." I whisper to him.

"Why?" he asks. "I was in my bed."

"I know. But I missed you anyway." I keep kissing his neck. "Can you do me a favor, please?"

"Okay. What?"

"Look down beside the bed and grab Dad's pajama bottoms and take them to him, please."

"But he left them there."

"I know. But he was still half asleep. Can you take them to the bathroom and give them to him for me?" I ask again.

"Okay." He grumbles as he crawls over to the edge of the bed and gets down.

"Come right back. I need to kiss on you some more." I smile at him as he gets off of the bed.

Teddy picks up the pale blue cotton pajama bottoms and walks to the bathroom with them. He stays for what seems ages to just deliver Christian's pajama bottoms. "Mama," I hear as Grace runs through the bedroom door. She is still in her pink nightgown, one of five or six identical gowns that she owns, she likes them, and has donned her tiara.

"Hey, baby. Come here." I hold out my arms and help her up into the bed and pull her close. "How are you this morning?" I ask

"I good."

"Did you sleep well?" I ask.

"Uh huh. I seept all night." She grins up at me.

Teddy and Christian exit the bathroom, Christian now in his pajamas, and they are deep in conversation. "Can you teach me how?" Teddy asks his dad.

"No son I can't teach you how. It will just do it." Christian puts his arm around Teddy's shoulder as they walk back toward the bed.

"But when?" he asks.

"When it's ready." Christian yawns. "When it's ready, it'll do it all on its own."

"Okay. I'll keep checking." Teddy tells him.

"You do that." Christian crawls on the bed and grabs Grace giving her a big hug. "How's my princess this, morning?" he asks as he gives her a big kiss.

"I awready toad Mama, I'm good." She sounds so impatient.

"Well excuse me for asking." Christian is sitting cross legged on the bed with Grace in his lap. "Did you sleep in your crown?" he asks.

"Nope. I put it on dis mornin'." She explains. "I can't seep in it. It be uncumtopul. I can't seep wif it on."

"Oh. Well it suits you." He says playing with her hair.

I give a big stretch and a yawn. "What do you kids want to do today?" I ask. Sunday is our day to be exclusively with them.

"Go fwimin'!" Grace grins.

"Yea. Can we get in the new pool?" Teddy gets excited.

"Sounds fine to me. The weather looks good. What about you Dad?" I ask Christian. "You want to go in the water again?"

"Sure. We don't get that many nice days. We paid for it we might as well use it. "

"YEA!" Teddy jumps on the bed.

"Sweetie, don't jump. You'll break the bed and we haven't had it that long after the last one got broken." I reach up to grab him and make him sit down. "I bought a bunch of pool toys yesterday. You guys can blow them up while I get breakfast fixed."

"Is Tommy up? Has anyone seen him?" I ask.

"Yep. I thaw him. He's pwaying in his woom." Grace tells me.

"Oh. Well I guess I should go get him." I throw my feet over the side and stand up. After a huge stretch I make my way down up the hall to Tommy's room. Peering through the door, I spot him sitting in the floor with Jimmy perched in the truck that Grace gave him. Tommy is just talking away as if someone were listening to him and he expected them to answer back. Quietly sliding in I walk over to him and squat to make myself eyelevel. "Good morning, little boy."

"Huwow," he says never stopping playing.

"Did you sleep good last night?" I ask him.

"Uh huh. " he nods.

"Watcha' doin"?

"Pwayin' wif my stuff."

"I see. You want to come be with the rest of the family? We're playing in the bedroom."

"Bwing Jimmy?" he asks.

"Of course you can bring Jimmy. Here." I hand the bear to him and bend down to pick him up. Once I have him in my arms, I give him a big hug and kiss his cheek." Mmmm. You smell good."

"I smew wike Tommy."

"Well that's a good smell." I tell him. "I like it. You want to go in the swimming pool today?" I ask as we walk back down the hall.

"I can't fwim." He shakes his head.

"Well I bought you some things to wear that will make you float. And Christian and I'll help you. Would you like to learn to swim while you're here?" I ask as we walk into our bedroom.

"I can't fwim. But I could twy."

"Yes you could. I'll bet we could teach you to swim." I get over to the bed and Christian is playing with the kids. Somehow he got Grace's tiara on his head. It doesn't suit him. "Who's ready for some breakfast?"

Teddy , Grace and Christian all chime in, "Me."

"Tommy? Are you hungry?" I ask.

"Uh huh." He nods.

"He's always hungry." Teddy chides.

"He's growing. He needs food to get big and tall and good looking." I give him another kiss on his cheek.

"Well, I suppose I should get up and get breakfast started." As I start to get off the bed Christian grabs my arm and pulls me over and presses his lips against mine. He gives me a nice chaste kiss in front of our children.

"Don't pay them any attention, Tommy. They do that all the time." Teddy let's Tommy know.

"Mmmm. I've never been kissed by anyone wearing a tiara before." I give him a big smile and he returns it with a smirk. "Can you get the kids downstairs for breakfast in a few minutes?"

"I'm all over it." he sighs as he removes his head gear and gives it back to Grace.

After brushing my teeth and pulling my hair back, I throw on a robe and head down to make our Sunday breakfast. While I'm scrambling the eggs, I can her the herd that is my family barreling down the stairs.

"CHRISTIAN!" I yell.

"I'm right here."

I turn to look at him. "Oh. I didn't see you. The pool toys are in the family room. Can you get the kids started blowing them up, please?"

"Sure." He kisses my neck and reaches around me to steal a piece of bacon.

"You know you don't have to try to distract me to steal bacon. I always cook a few extra for you to snatch."

"Yeah, but I like trying to distract you." He grins as he crunches.

"The vacuum is in the storage closet off the laundry room. You can use it when the kids run out of air."

"For what?"

"There is an attachment in with the toys that goes on the vacuum. The instructions are on the package. That way you can use it to blow the toys up."

"Really?"

"Yes, really. I don't want anyone passing out."

"Humm. Okay. Being an expert on inflating things, I'll make sure it gets done." He grins and raises his eyebrows a she snatches his second piece of bacon. Exiting the kitchen he wipes his greasy fingers on the pajama bottoms covering his butt.

"DON'T WIPE YOUR GREASY FINGERS ON YOUR BUTT." I yell after him.

"YES MA'AM," he yells back, still crunching away and still wiping.

After we get the kids fed, everything cleaned up, the rafts and toys inflated and the kids in their swim suits Christian and I are sitting on the patio each slathering sunscreen on a child.

"Yuck Dadee. No." Grace is squirming as Christian tries to get her covered in the lotion.

"Grace. Stand still. You are not getting in the pool until you get this stuff on you." Christian growls at her.

I finish getting Teddy covered and Christian takes them to the pool as I start getting Tommy greased down.

"Huwy Dadee. Huwy."Grace is squealing.

"Hold on a minute. I have to get this gate unlocked." Christian finally gets the gate unlocked that separates the kids from the pool. "Now. You cannot get in until I tell you to. Do you understand me?" he warns.

"Uh huh. Peese."

"And you will listen to me and your mother at all times. Do you hear me?" he warns again.

"Yesth,Daddy. Huwy Peese." Grace is wiggling in place.

"And you will never get in that pool by yourself."

"Yesth, yesth. I go now?" she asks.

Christian opens the gate and Teddy and Grace charge in. "Grace! Stop." Christian yells. "Grace did you hear me?" He yells again. She pays him no attention and continues on her trek to the pool's edge.

"Christian! Stop her." I yell out to him.

"Fuck!" Christian throws down the pool toys and apprehends his charging daughter. He grabs her by her bathing suit straps and swats her butt. As she starts to wail he picks her up in his arms." Grace. Did you listen to me?"

"No." she sniffles.

"Were you supposed to listen to me?" he asks.

""Yesth. I wisen now." She wipes her cheeks with the backs of her little hands.

"Well, now you are in a time out. Go sit on the lawn chair until I tell you otherwise." He growls as he sets her down. Pouting all the way she does as she is told and plants herself in the chair with her arms folded across her chest, still sniveling and pouting. Teddy helps Christian throw the floats into the pool as I finish with Tommy.

"Why I habe to wear dis?" Tommy asks as I rub the lotion into his cheeks.

"Because we don't want you to get a sunburn. This will help keep you from getting too much sun."

"I neber had dis before," he explains.

"I know, baby, but it won't take much longer." I continue to rub him down. " Now before you get in the water, I'm going to put a float around your waist and one on each arm. That will help you stay above the water. And I don't want you getting in unless you are with me or Christian. Do you understand?"

"Uh huh. I dwown." He nods.

"Well hopefully not, but we want to be extra careful until you learn to swim okay?" I get him finished and give him a quick kiss on his nose. "Okay, let's go." I take him by his hand and we go over to the pool where Christian is getting Teddy's water wings on him. Even though Teddy can swim I don't want him in the water without them. I grab a float belt and cinch Tommy up then slide the water wings on his arms.

Christian walks over to the diving board and does a perfect swan dive into the pool. He wouldn't do anything less. As he surfaces he motions for teddy to jump in and Christian catches him as he hits the water. Poor Grace is still pouting in her chair. I pick up Tommy and we head to the shallow end where there is an incline that leads into the water. I can sense that he is apprehensive about the water, so I hold on to him as we slowly get in.

"Are you okay sweetie?" I ask him.

"No. No more." he shakes his head.

"Okay. How about if I sit here with you?" I ask him. He gives me a nod as I sit down in about a foot of water. I set him down on his feet and hold his hand as I let him get used to the water. Christian swims over and sits next to me as we try to let Tommy get used to the water.

"Grace?" he calls out.

""Yesth, Daddy?" she jumps up.

"Just checking to see if you're listening." He hollers back. She reclaims her seat and her pout.

"Christian that was mean." I scold him.

"I want to make sure she pays attention." He explains as he chuckles. "I'd rather have her pissed at me than at the bottom of the pool."

"Sun feels good. It reminds me of our honeymoon. We were on the beach practically every day."

Christian leans over and gives me a kiss. "Yep. Now here we are with two kids and a spare, sittin' in the back yard," he grumps.

"It's not so bad. It's a beautiful back yard. And they are exceptional kids." I smile over at him.

"DADEE!" Grace screams. "NOW?"

"Not until I tell you. The more you ask the longer it will be." He yells back at her.

"You're killing her." I whisper to him.

"She won't die. I'll let her up in a minute." Christian looks around surveying the new installation. "Elliott really did a good job on the pool."

"Yes. It's beautiful. I can't wait until the kids are old enough to take this fence down. It blends right in with the landscape."

"Hey Dad. Watch." Teddy howls.

"Let me see you swim across the pool." Christian yells back. Teddy pushes off from the side and tries to swim across. "He can't swim with those damn things on his arms."

"I know, but I feel better with him having them on." I tell him. As Teddy struggles to float/swim, Jack has managed to get through the gate. He runs over to Christian and jumps in his lap throwing water everywhere. Christian grabs him and tries to hold him still. Tommy has squatted down in the water and is splashing around. "Do you like the water?" I ask him.

"I fink I do," he says.

"You want me to carry you out a little ways?"

"I fwaid."

"There's no reason to be afraid. I won't let go of you." I try to reassure him.

"Maybe." He says reluctantly.

"I'll take Tommy in the pool. You go get Grace before she expires." I tell Christian.

"Okay. I guess she's suffered enough."

As I pick tommy up Christian goes over and gets Grace suited up for the water. He walks over following me as I gradually take Tommy into deeper water. Without warning Jack takes a leap and hits the water and comes up dog paddling for all he's worth.

"Hey look. Jack can swim." Teddy, hollers as Jack swims toward him and the float.

"Of course he can. That's how we found him." Christian tells him as he and Grace are chest deep in the pool. "Wet me go Dadee. I can fwim." Grace insists.

"No you can't swim. I have a hold of your swim suit. Jus cool your jets," he reminds her.

"But I can fwim."

"Grace. Are you listening?"

"Yesth. I wistening." She acquiesces.

After an hour or so, we are out of the pool. Christian and I are lying in the chaises, watching as the kids run in the yard followed by Jack. "You want to grill burgers?" I ask him.

"Sure why not."

"I'll go in and get meat out to thaw. Hot dogs too?"

"Sure. And bring a bottle of wine back when you ?"

"Yes, Sir. Back in a minute." After getting things out for dinner, I return with a chilled bottle of Pouilly- Fuissé. I hand him the bottle and two glasses and call the kids for the lemonade I've brought. After getting some liquid down them, I lay Grace and Tommy down on a blanket under the umbrella for a little nap. It takes about two seconds for them to konk out.

"Aren't they cute?" I mention to Christian as we sip our wine and enjoy the quiet.

"He'll be cuter when he's back with his mother." Christian tells me.

"Christian I know. They just look sweet asleep together like that. They almost look like twins."

"Speaking of looking good, you look pretty fucking hot in that suit, Mrs. Grey."

"Thanks, but I'm not laboring under any delusions. I've had three… er two… um three. Oh fuck." I sigh.

Christian grabs my hand, "I know what you're trying to say." He gives me a smile and presses his lips to my fingers. " And you still look fucking hot baby."

"Thanks. As long as you think so that's what counts."

"It's not just me. I wanna' kill every man that looks at you."

"Well you can't do that." I giggle.

"Oh but in a perfect world…" he sighs.

We spend the rest of the day in the yard swimming sunbathing, grilling burgers, even eating dinner on the patio. After dinner Christian and I are on the patio watching the sun sinking over the lake and sipping wine. Grace walks over and crawls up in Christian's lap. No sooner does she lay her head against him than she is asleep. I pull tommy up in mine and he is soon snoring away as well.

"Teddy?"

"Yeah Dad?" he yells as he throws a ball for Jack.

"Bout ready to come in?" Christian asks him.

"Do I have to?" Teddy asks.

"Unless you are planning to sleep outside, it's about time, son."

Teddy freezes and looks at his dad, "I can sleep outside?"

"Now you've done it." I whisper to him.

"No, son, you can't sleep outside. Grab jack and let's go inside. It's getting dark."

Christian stands up carrying Grace and his wine glass and I grab Tommy. Teddy finally arrives on the patio with the dog and we walk inside. "Head upstairs and start a tub. I'll be there in a minute."

"Dad ? Why do I have to get a bath. I took a bath in the pool."

"Don't argue. I'll be up to help you in a couple of minutes."

Teddy stomps off up the stairs followed by Christian and me each carrying a sleeping child.

* * *

"Are you working already?" I ask him as I walk toward the bed. I've showered and gotten in my gown. I sit on my side of the bed and begin to rub lotion on my legs. "It' Sunday. Can't it wait until tomorrow?"

Christian is once again leaning on the headboard, glasses on and laptop open. "I just want to catch up on a few emails before I go in in the morning."

"Won't they be there tomorrow?"

"Yes. But I'll already be up on what's going on before I hit the office." He looks over and gives me a smile before returning his attention to the computer screen.

"The kids had a ball today." I continue to rub the lotion into my dry legs.

"Yep."

"I can't believe how tired they got. All that sun and swimming really wore them out."

"Yeah." Christian continues to stare at his computer and rubbing his lower lip with his index finger.

"We should have gotten a pool ages ago if it has this effect on them."

"Uh huh."

"I thought maybe after you get the Grace fixed we could put it in the pool."

"Sure." he is pounding away on his keyboard.

"Actually I thought we might go skinny dipping after the kids went to sleep."

"Okay."

I roll over and pull his glasses off getting his attention. "Hey. Stop. You aren't listening to me." I tease him.

"Yes I am. You said you wanted to go skinny dipping." He grabs his glasses back. "We'll go as soon as I am finished with this."

"You're serious?" I ask now sitting on my knees staring at him.

"Yep."

"Swimming with no clothes on? Outside? In public?"

"It's not public," he closes the laptop and puts it aside then grabs me pushing me on the bed, "it's our back yard."

"But anyone passing by could see."

"Just who do you figure will be passing by?"

"Well, I don't know. But it's outside." I pout up apt him as he rains soft kisses over my chest and breasts. "Christian I was teasing. I just wanted to make sure you were listening to me."

"Don't make offers you can't follow through on." He says pressing his lips around an erect nipple. "That's very bad business practice."

With that he gets up and heads to the bathroom. In a few moments he emerges with a towel around his hips and nothing else. He tosses me a fluffy white towel, "Come on. Get that gown off and let's get that pool christened."

"Oh, no. I don't think we should. I mean the kids could get up, security could see us.."

"I'll have the CCTV surveillance turned off. Now get your ass up and naked and lets go." Christian picks up the house phone and pushes the button for Gail and Jason's residence. "Taylor?" "Grey. I'm turning off the CCTV surveillance outside the house temporarily. Want you to be aware when the security team calls to advise you." "No. It won't be for long. I'll let you know when to resume surveillance. "

"There. We're all alone." He flashes me a grin.

"Christian, we're never alone. Between kids, staff and security we're always surrounded by someone." I grumble at him as I pull my gown over my head and wrap the towel around me. "I think the only time we've really been alone was on our honeymoon. Even then there was staff on the boat."

He extends his arm and I put my hand in his as we walk out of our bedroom and down the hall. As we hit the family room Christian opens a panel on the wall just off of the kitchen and begins to flip switches. Suddenly the lights on the outside of the house begin to go out. Christian returns and takes me by the waist as we walk outside. "It's so dark. I don't think I've ever seen the house dark like this." I whisper.

"That's because the lights are always on. And you don't have to whisper." He leans over and kisses my cheek. As we pass through the gate and enter the pool area Christian throws his towel off and dives into the pool. I stand motionless as I watch him surface and shake the water from his hair. "You coming?"

"I'm thinking about it. Is it cold?" I ask.

"No. It's warm. Come on." He gives me a grin and motions his head for me to join him.

"I think I'll go to the other end and walk in." I turn to go to the shallow end and walk down the incline. Christian swims to the edge and pulls himself out of the water. Oh, my God he's glorious. All arms and legs and muscles and skin and all wet. In one swift move he grabs my towel and yanks it off. I quickly try to cover my girl parts with my arms and hands. Christian scoops me in his arms gives me a quick kiss and then jumps back in the pool with me in tow.

"Chrisitan!" I squeal just before hitting the water. I change that to ,"You big jerk." As I come up spitting and sputtering.

"Shhh." He tries not to laugh." Your voice is echoing across the lake." He swims over to me and pulls me in his arms and I wrap my legs around his waist. "Come here. I'm about to fuck you in this pool Mrs. Grey."

"But our kids swim in this pool." I feign shock.

"I don't give a shit. I'm still gonna' fuck you in this pool." He leans in and presses his mouth to mine and I allow him to explore it with his tongue.

"Mmmm." I moan into his mouth still clinging to him. "We seem to be missing a critical element to this process." I smirk at him.

"I know. Water's colder than I thought." He grimaces. "Give me a minute."

Christian moves around in the water with me attached to him. "You know this is kinda' nice. It's dark and quiet. You can hear the water lapping against the shore." I whisper against his ear. The only light is provided by the almost full moon .

"I know. No kids, no dogs, no Gail and Taylor. Just you and me and the moon and the lake. One could say it's romantic."

"Well I think it's romantic." I lean my head on his shoulder." Any progress?"

"Not yet."

I slide my hand between us and reach down and grab him stroking him. "How's that?"

"I think that might do the trick," he grimaces. "Yep. I think that just might do it."

I can feel him growing in my hand. He is getting firmer and larger as he bends his head down and takes one of my erect, cold, pink nipples into his mouth and sucks. "Mmmm," he moans." I like the way your tits float."

"They're perkier in the water." I chuckle. "Look at all those stars."

"I know. It's amazing how many you can see with the lights out," he whispers.

"What's that one over there?" I ask.

"I don't know." He growls.

"You didn't even look. It's really bright."

"I don't want to fucking look. I'm concentrating." He snarls. I can feel his heart racing as I continue to pull and stroke his now fairly healthy erection. I quickly position him at my entrance and pull myself toward him letting him slide in.

"Fuck. Now that's what I'm talking about," he groans.

I begin to roll my hips letting him glide in and out and Christian rolls his to meet mine. He releases me and I lie back stretched out on the water's surface. Christian has his hands about my waist as he thrusts in and out making little splashes of water. My hair floats out away from my head fanning out in the water. I stare up at the black starlit sky as Christian christens his pool. "Christian, I don't think that's a star. It's getting brighter." I tell him a bit concerned.

"It's just a fucking plane." He growls at me. "God this feels good. You're so warm inside."

I want to explode when he uses the pad of his thumb to put pressure on and massage the nerve center between my thighs. "Oh shit." I gasp as I begin to melt into him. As I open my eyes I can see the light in the sky getting closer and brighter. Suddenly it becomes clear just what it is. I recognize it from last night. I violently try to pull away from Christian. "Christian stop. We have to go in."

"What? No. Don't stop." He holds me tighter and continues to thrust even more wildly.

"No. Christian. It's a helicopter. We have to go in."

"Just a second, baby. Hold on." He growls as he pulls me closer and cups my butt in his hands. I sit up and he wraps his arms around me as he pushes and pants with a singular result in mind.

"Christian let me go. We have to get out of here. They'll see us. It could be the reporters like the other night." I struggle against him.

"Oh, fuck. Just …just. Fuck don't move!" he pants as he suddenly thrusts hard and pulls my hips to meet his. "Oh, fucking Jesus." He growls into my neck and I can feel him shudder against me. As soon as he begins to relax, I move away and start for the shallow end of the pool. "Christian! Come on Sweetheart. Hurry." I grab the hand of my half-conscious husband trying to drag him from the pool. As we exit the water, I grab our towels and try to cover us as we head to the house. I can hear the blades cutting the air and getting louder and louder as the huge machine gets closer. The search lights are washing over the lake lighting up the landscape as it nears.

We finally make it inside just as the copter hovers over the back yard and washes it in light. Christian and I are just inside the house and have darkened the huge windows as we observe the spectacle outside our door. After a few moments the helicopter moves on after giving the yard the once over with the search light. "Damn! That was close."

"I told you I saw that thing coming toward us." I fume at him. "That would have made a lovely picture in tomorrow's paper. Us naked, in the pool." I speculate.

"Yep. 'Naked Billionaire Fucks Wife in Backyard'. It would have sold a few papers." He chuckles.

Christian has his arm around my shoulder as we stop at the box in the wall and he flips on the surveillance cameras and the yard once again floods with light. We continue through to the staircase and head upstairs.

"I told you someone might see us." I shiver next to him.

"I know. Don't worry, I'll talk to someone about that tomorrow. Damn if they start hovering over the fucking house." He kisses my forehead. "Come on. Let's go get warm. And I believe I owe you one."


	73. Chapter 73

**_Fifty Shades…Full Circle_**

**_Chapter 73_**

"Hey Sweetie."

"Hi Ana. How's Christian?"

"He's good even though I feel like nailing his foot to the floor sometimes to try to keep him out of trouble. How's Ethan?"

"Oh, Ana, he's just the best. Anything I want, anything I need he's right there with it. I just feel so huge."

"Mia! You're only a couple of months. You've barely begun."

"I know. I just feel like I need to lose ten pounds."

"Just get it off your mind and enjoy it. Worry about the weight after the baby gets here."

"Speaking of the baby, how are the kids?"

"Just the same. We spent the day in the new pool yesterday. Elliott did such a great job. It's really beautiful. We want to have everyone over one Saturday."

"Sounds like fun. Look I called to tell you about the housewarming Saturday. You're still coming right?"

"Wouldn't miss it. I'm sure Christian wants to see what we gave you."

"I just love it. Ethan wasn't too crazy about the idea of taking a gift so large from my brother. He kept saying he could afford to buy any house we wanted. I know his parents have money, but he insists on us living on what he makes with his practice. "

"How'd you talk him into it?"

"I just told him Christian would be offended if we didn't accept it. And he doesn't want to offend Christian. But he paid to have it remodeled and decorated. I just love it. I can't wait for everyone to see it."

"So what color did you do the nursery?"

"We didn't. It's a blank room right now. I'm superstitious. I don't want to do the nursery until closer to time. And it will be yellow. Does that answer your question?"

"No. But I don't blame you. I think waiting is a great idea. Just get it done before the baby gets here."

"Okay. Let me give you the information. It's Saturday evening. Come around five and bring the kids."

"Kids? I was hoping to have an evening out without them."

"Nope. Everyone is bringing their kids. I thought we'd grill out. Hot dogs for the kids and steaks for the adults. The address is 5012 W Lake Sammamish Pkwy. It's a big stone and taupe wood Craftsman style house. The drive is sort of hidden but once you turn in, it opens up to a large car park."

"Is it on the water?"

"Yes. We looked forever trying to find one with a yard for the kids to play in. So many of them were just hardscape right down to the water. But there is this huge covered patio at the yard level. Oh, you're going to love it."

"I'm sure we will. Now can I bring anything?"

"Nope. I'm doing it all. Well, my catering business is. Just come and enjoy yourself."

"Okay. We're looking forward to it. "

"Me too. We'll see you Saturday, then."

"Okay, sweetie. See you then"

That sounds like fun; just the family. I'm really glad the kids are going. It's my birthday and I really want them there. I doubt Mia even remembered Saturday was my birthday. This will be just as much fun. I hate fussing over my birthday anyway. Well back to work. I have mounds to do. I need to get three chapters revised and sent to this author so we can conference in and discuss the rewrites. Let's see delete this, this, this. Crap. It's going to be one of those mornings.

"Hello Ms. Kavanagh."

"Hey Steele. How's it going?"

"Busy. How about you?"

"Good. Look, how's Christian? Elliott and I snuck off for the weekend and we didn't hear about Christian being missing until this morning. I assume since the market hasn't taken a nosedive Mr. Unreasonably Wealthy has been found safe and sound."

"Yes. He and Teddy both. It's a long story."

"Good. Have lunch with me and tell me all about it."

"Oh, Kate. I'm swamped. I have so much to do."

"Good. Do it later. Have lunch with me."

"Kate I have a manuscript to take apart and put back together. I really…"

"You said Christian works at night, just work when he does. Have lunch with me Steele."

"Oh, okay. I'll have lunch with you. I have a haircut appointment this afternoon, so I'll have to come to town anyway. Where do you want to eat?"

"Lark?"

"Not open for lunch. How about Mistral? "

"Elliott and I ate there last week. What about Terrazzo Carmine?"

"Okay. I haven't been there in ages. Meet you there at noon?"

"Sounds good. I'll you see at noon."

I take my empty cup to the kitchen an put it in the dishwasher and watch Gail with the kids for a moment. She is so good with them and they love her.

"Gail, I'm going up to get dressed. I'm meeting Kate for lunch and then I have a haircut appointment."

"Okay. Have fun."

"Oh and I made a dental appointment for Tommy on Wednesday. I think I'll stop and get him a haircut too. He could use a little trim."

She is smiling down at the pile of kids and dog on the floor. "Okay. His hair could use a bit of cleaning up. Wonder if he's ever been to the dentist?"

"Something tells me no. Dr. Carmichael may have his work cut out for him. First time and being as skittish as he is." I let out a big sigh. " Well, can't be helped. He needs to go."

"I'll holler at you before I leave." I'm off to my room to get dressed to meet Kate.

After a quick shower, some make-up and a change of clothes, I'm ready to go. After kissing the kids goodbye and telling Gail I'll be back in time for dinner I slide into my R8, let the top down and speed past the reporters at the gate to catch the 405 to head into town. I feel guilty skipping out of work this early, but I have my phone and I'll get those rewrites done tonight while Christian is married to his laptop. I move my hair out of my face and realize that there will be less of it going home. I'm excited about this haircut. I haven't cut my hair, really cut it in years; way before I even met Christian.

Pulling up on 1st in front of Il Terrazzo Carmine, I turn my car over to the valet and run inside to meet Kate. I'm stopped just inside the door by a wall of suits and ties. Good heavens what a crowd. As I make my way to the hostess desk I see Kate waiting. She is leaning against a wall making conversation with several gentlemen in a group. She looks so at ease. She is in a mint green linen suit with a pencil skirt that hits just below her knee. She has an exquisite scarf tucked in around the collar of her suite jacket, I suspect it's Hermes knowing Kate. Her black patent pumps really accentuate the curve of her calves, hips and her slim figure. Her blonde hair is chin length and loose curls frame her face and fall over her forehead. Damn I always wanted to look like her. If she weren't my best friend I'd hate her.

"Kate?" I finally make my way through the crowd.

"Steele. Hi. You made it." We give each other a big hug.

"Yes it seems so. I had no idea it would be this crowded and all men."

"Yes. I forgot it was voted one of Seattle's best places for a business lunch."

"Well hello." As distinguished salt and pepper haired man in a navy suit addresses me. He was just conversing with Kate and has a glass of something on the rocks in his hand and almost spills it as someone makes their way past him.

"Hi." I give him a polite reply. "Kate, maybe we should try somewhere else."

"Oh, don't be silly. This place is crowded for a reason. They have a great lunch."

"So your name is Steele?" the gentleman asks. "I'm Arnie. Arnie Gardner."

"No. Actually it's Ana….." I gasp as his drink leaves his glass and is splashed down my lavender silk off the shoulder top.

"Oh. Hey I'm so sorry." He says as he tries to help clean me up.

"No. It's okay. It's not your fault. That guy bumped you." I am trying to wipe myself up with a napkin.

The hostess comes over to help. "Ma'am, would and your friend like to wait at the bar. At least you'll have a place to sit down." She offers.

Kate nods. "Yes. That would be great." We follow her to two stools that she has cleared for us at the bar. "These guys can be beasts. Just give 'em the brush off." She murmurs to me on our way.

"Yes. I'll try. Thank you."

"What would you like to drink?" she asks.

"I'll just have a glass of Chardonnay." I tell her.

"Dry martini for me." Kate chimes in.

The hostess catches the attention of the bartender, "Eddie. Glass of Cardonnay and a dry martini. On the house." She gives us a smile, "I'll get your table as soon as I can."

"Gosh, Ana. I hope your blouse isn't ruined." Kate fusses.

"Me too. I rather liked this one." I tell her still trying to dry my top. "I hate crowds like this."

"It's good for you. You stay out there in that mausoleum of a house all the time. It's good for you to get into town and be with people."

"I'm with people enough. Three kids, a dog and a husband." I sigh, "And with that comes a housekeeper and a security detail, one of which is over there lurking in the corner." I nod in the direction of Sawyer.

"That's what I'm talking about. You need to get out and meet some new people. Get a fresh perspective on things."

"Oh, like the one who just dumped a drink all over me? No thanks."

I jump as a hand touches my shoulder. "Hey. I really am sorry. Can I at least buy you a drink?"

"Oh? Um Arnie, is it? I have a drink thank you." I give him a smile and politely turn my back to him.

"No really. Um, I don't know what to say. I'd really like to buy you a drink, just to be able to get to know you a little better." Arnie stutters.

"Sir. I'd rather you left the lady alone." Sawyer has arrived in a flash and is addressing Arnie.

"Look I don't really care what you'd rather. The lady and I are having a conversation. " Arnie tells him.

"Sir. Please. I'd rather not have to ask again. Back away."

"And I said piss off." Arnie tells him. "Who is this guy? You're personal body guard?" Arnie asks.

Kate howls. "Actually, Arnie, that's exactly who he is."

Poor Arnie looks a bit perplexed, but not deterred. "Really? You must have guys all over you. I can see why you'd need a body guard."

Arnie is suddenly whirled around and I see flashing gray eyes and copper hair standing behind him. "The only guy that's all over her is me. And I'll break your fucking face if you don't get away from my wife." I can see Christian is a nanosecond from following through with his promise.

"Sweetheart. He was just being nice. Please." I try to come in between them.

"Hey, Grey. I didn't recognize her. I didn't know she was your wife." Arnie has his hands up in surrender. "I'm sorry. I didn't know. My mistake."

Christian releases Arnie's jacket collar from his grasp and begins to breathe, still shooting daggers at the guy with his eyes. "I don't care what he was doing. He's not doing it with my wife."

"I apologize Mrs. Grey. I didn't recognize you. No harm meant. I'll leave you alone. It was nice to meet you." He tries to gracefully back away.

"Don't ever let me catch you even looking in her direction again. Got it Gardner?" Christian warns.

" Got it." Arnie turns and adjusting his jacket and straightening his tie he joins his group of lunch partners.

"What the fuck was all of that?" Christian glares at me. "And what are you doing here?"

"Christian. Calm down. Ana and I were just…." Kate tries to explain.

"Shut up Kate. I'm sure somehow this is all your fault," he growls at her.

"Christian. Please. This is embarrassing. Calm down. It's not what you think." I try to calm him down a bit.

"It better fucking not be."

"What do you mean by that?"

"I don't want anyone putting their hands on you….Ever!"

"Christian he wasn't putting his hands on me. He was trying to apologize and buy me a drink."

"Why? So he could stand here and talk to you? Just hoping for a chance to get his fucking hands on you?"

"Oh, for God's sake. Give me a little credit. I'd never let anyone put their hands on me."

Christian runs his hand through his hair as he tries to calm down. Sawyer has taken up his post in the corner again.

"I know. I just can't stand the thought." He grabs me by the arm and begins to drag me back toward the ladies lounge. " I need to talk to you."

"Go ahead and get our table. I'll be back in a minute Kate." I can see the disapproval on her face as she watches me walk away with my husband. Entering the ladies lounge, it is small with just two stalls. Both doors are open and Christian walks over and pushes the doors in checking them both. As he returns he locks the bathroom door and grabs my upper arms pulling me against him. He searches my face for a moment before leaning down and pressing his mouth to mine. I respond returning his kiss. His lips slide over mine teasing me with his tongue until I open for him. His passion is almost overwhelming and he is breathing like a race horse as he attacks my mouth with his.

"Fuck you can make me so angry." He growls against my lips.

"Christian you aren't angry. You're jealous. And you don't need to be."

"But you're mine. You always have been and you always will be. No one touches what's mine."

"Calm down. It's alright." I try to reassure him as his hand glides up under my skirt and his fingers squeeze and knead my butt. He pulls my knee up to his waist as he grinds his hard pelvis into mine.

"Christian." I manage to gasp. "What are you doing?"

"I want you. Here. Now." He growls against my neck.

"We're in the ladies' room and Kate is waiting on me."

"Fuck Kate. I need you." He says between kisses. Cupping my butt in his hands he picks me up and takes me to the vanity sitting me on it. Without breaking our lips he shoves his hand down my satin panties and drags his finger between my thighs. "You're dripping. Don't try to tell me you aren't as turned on as I am."

I hear the zip as he unzips his gray suit trousers. In an instant he slides the crotch of my panties to the side and forces his way into me. "Oh shit." I gasp against him.

"Hold on. I just need you right now." He growls as he begins to violently thrust into me. "I just fucking need you."

"I know, baby." I twist my hand in his hair as my hips meet his with each thrust.

"You're mine, Ana Grey." He snarls against my neck as he forces himself in and out.

"Yes. I'm all yours, Christian." I gasp. "All yours." I'm so turned on that it doesn't take but a few thrusts and I'm over the edge. "Fuck." I whisper against him as I begin to tighten and spasm around him. As I do Christian groans and begins to quietly shudder.

"Fuck. " he moans. As quickly as it started it's over. We both try to catch our breath.

"Hand me a couple of paper towels," I pant. Christian takes a couple of paper towels from the dispenser and hands them to me as he pulls out. I quickly stand up and wet the paper towels cleaning myself and trying to get presentable. Christian does the same. We spend a few moments washing, adjusting and smoothing; trying to look like nothing happened.

"Ready?" I ask him as I wipe lipstick off of his mouth.

"Yep." As we turn to leave he grabs my arm and pulls me back. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to embarrass you out there." He almost looks like a scolded little boy. "I just love you so fucking much. I don't know what I'd do if I ever lost you."

"You'll never have to find out." I give him a quick kiss. "We can talk about it this evening. "Then we open the bathroom door. Sawyer is standing stoically just outside the door and I give him a sheepish smile as we walk by.

"Sawyer?"

"Yes, Mr. Grey?"

"Will you see Mrs. Grey safely back to her table?" Christian asks. "I need to get back to my lunch guests."

"Certainly." He steps aside for me to go first. "Mrs. Grey."

"I'll see you this evening." I give his face a stroke with my fingers and walk out to find Kate and our table.

"I ordered you another glass of wine." Kate tells me as I sit down across from her.

"Thanks."

"You two just never stop do you?" she asks peering over her menu.

"What do you mean?" I ask as I take a sip of wine.

"You just did it in the ladies room, didn't you?"

"What makes you think that?" I ask almost offended.

"Your flushed. And you're still breathing hard," she snorts.

I have to smile. "What can I say?" I shrug.

"Is he ever going to stop being jealous of every man that crosses your path?" she asks.

"Oh, Kate I doubt it. Sometime it drives me insane. But then sometimes it's just so …so hot. I mean to be loved like that."

"He hasn't seemed to change his stalking ways much."

"Yes he has. Today was an exception. We had a hard weekend and things are in a turmoil at home. I think it's just stress."

"I know. He is basically a good guy. But, brother-in-law or not, if he ever tells me to shut up again, he'll be wearing his balls for cuff links." She smirks as she takes another sip of her martini.

"That I don't doubt." I give her a smile. "Now what are we eating?"

Kate and I enjoy lunch and catch up on everything. She wants to know what to get Mia and Ethan for a wedding gift. I told her we gave them Liz's services to redo the house. She isn't sure what they are going to do. Kate asks about Tommy and what is going on with that. I explain the situation and knowing me as well as she does, she gives me a good warning.

"I know. Christian is always on me about doing so much for him. He says it isn't good for me or for Tommy." I explain to her.

"He's right. It's going to kill you when that kid goes back to live with his mother."

"I have gotten attached. But I really do want what's best for him. I know a child belongs with their mother. I would die if I were ever separated from Teddy or Grace."

"How's Christian doing with him there. Can't be easy for him." Kate asks.

"He's doing well. Better every day. Still wants him to go back to Lorna as soon as possible, though."

Looking up I see Christian walking out with his party. He seems to excuse himself and walks over to our table. "Kate. I want to apologize for my behavior earlier. I was rude to you and I'm…well I'm sorry."

"Okay, Christian. Thank you."

Christian gives me a quick kiss on my cheek. "Have a good lunch, Sweetheart. Be careful driving home."

"Okay. I will. Have a good rest of the day and I'll see you at home."

Christian walks back to his party and they exit the restaurant with Taylor close behind.

"Well, I have a haircut appointment in about a half an hour." I smile over at Kate.

"Guess we'd better settle up and get on our way then."

"Kate. Christian would never let us pay for lunch. I guarantee you he has already taken care of it."

"Think so?" she asks.

"I know so. That's just the way he is."

As our cars are brought around I give her a hug and then slide into my car and give her a wave as I take off. With Elena gone, I can finally go back to Ron at the Salon. Actually Ron has bought into the shop and is part owner with Caroline. He gets excited when he finds out I actually want to cut quite a bit off. After my shampoo, he takes a deep breath and plunges his scissors in lopping off about eight to ten inches. After he finishes and blows it dry I get a good look at it.

"Oh. My. God. I love it." I almost squeal.

Ron audibly exhales fanning himself with his fingers, "Oh, thank you Jesus." He looks so relieved. "I just think it looks so good on you. I mean I've been waiting years to cut some of that off. But it's not too short you know. You still have enough to be sexy, girl." He can't take his hands off of it, rearranging it and playing with it.

It really looks good. It still brushes my shoulders with the ends layered and is blown out straight with a few light bangs over my forehead. "It just feels so good to have all that gone. It's so much lighter. I really, really like it. Thank you."

"I just hope that hunk of a husband of yours likes it. You know how men like that long hair."

"I think he will. I discussed it with him the other day and it's not really that short."

"I hope so. Last thing I want is that man coming after me for wacking all your hair off."

"He won't. Oh, I need to make an appointment to get one of the kids a haircut. Do you have anything Wednesday afternoon?"

"For you, sure. Is it Grace?" he asks.

"No…."

"Teddy? I thought he always went to the barbershop." He asks.

"No not Teddy. It's Tommy."

"Who's Tommy?"

"He's a child we're keeping for a while. Sort of a foster situation. I doubt he's ever had a real haircut."

"You going out and picking 'em up off the street now?" he gives me a smile.

"Something like that."

"You bring him in and we'll get him all shined up. That kid doesn't know how lucky he is to have fallen in with you."

"I'm not so sure. It could be that we're the lucky ones."


	74. Chapter 74

_**Fifty Shades…Full Circle**_

_**Chapter 74**_

_**A/N: I want to thank each and every one who has read and taken time to leave a review. I read every single one, good and bad, and appreciate them all. Without them there is no reason to continue this story. I sincerely thank you.**_

_** For some reason unbeknownst to me, this chapter took a direction toward lemony freshness. Mature content warning.**_

* * *

Walking into Christian's office I watch him open one of his laptops and log in. He still has his jacket on, but is loosening his tie and unbuttoning his collar. "You just walked in the door and you're already working?" I ask as I stand in the doorway.

"Just getting logged in, so I can keep up." He finally looks up at me and the smile leaves his face. "What did you do?"

"What?" I'm confused. "What do you mean?"

"Your hair. What have you done?"

"Oh. Today was my hair appointment. Do you like it?"

He walks over to me and runs his fingers through my new haircut. "It's short."

"Christian we talked about it, remember?"

"We did?"

"Yes. We did."

"What did I say?"

"You said it was fine as long as you could still braid it and wrap it around your hand."

He gathers it up in his hand and wraps it around his wrist and pulls my head back. Leaning in he gives me a long wet kiss. "Do you like it?" he growls.

"Yes. Actually, I love it." I whisper back.

"Then I like it too." He releases his hold and then glides his fingers through it from my temples to the back letting it cascade through his fingers. "You're beautiful." He gives me a quick peck on the lips and then wraps his arm around my waist as we walk out of his office.

"Want something to drink?' I ask him.

"Sure. What are you having?"

"Nothing yet. I was waiting on you."

"Okay. How about something cool and white. You pick it."

"Hmm. Okay. I can do that." I give him a quick kiss and go to the kitchen as he heads to the family room and the waiting kids. Looking in the cooler I pull out a Sancerre; we haven't had one lately.

"I can get that for you." Gail says.

"I've got it." I tell her as I grab a couple of glasses and set the bottle in the opener.

"How did he like the hair?" she asks warily.

"I think he was taken aback at first, but basically he said if I liked it then he liked it." I pull the lever up and the cork slides out of the bottle. Then I fill two glasses and start for the family room.

"Well I think it looks cute. A new haircut can change you whole outlook on life." Gail tells me. "I'll bring some hors d'oeuvres in a minute."

"Okay. Thanks Gail."

When I get to the family room Christian is in a serious discussion with Teddy. "We'll talk about it later son." Christian gives Teddy a pat on the butt and a smile and sends him back to the television.

"Here." I hand him his glass. "Gail is bringing in some hors d'oeuvres."

"Mmmm." He takes a sip. "Good. I'm starved."

"What was that about?"

"What?"

"With Teddy. He looked worried, is anything wrong?"

Christian shakes his head, "No. He's still obsessed over having an erection."

"What? He's too young. Christian do you think there is something wrong? I mean…He just has this penis thing on his mind so much." I'm almost frantic to think something bad might be happening.

"No." he smirks. "It's his age. It's new and exciting. Sort of like getting a new car. You know how you can't take your eyes off of it, you want to just go sit in it and touch everything in it. Take it out for a spin."

"No I can't say that I've ever felt like that." I take another sip.

"Weren't you like that when you got tits?" he asks.

"No. They sort of creep up on you gradually."

"I'm sure he's having feelings, even at his age. He just wants to know what's going on; make sure everything is okay."

"I just don't want him to turn into some sort of sex maniac."

"He'd come by it honestly," he smiles. "I mean you are pretty insatiable."

I give him a punch to the gut. "Me? You're the one who just had to have it in the ladies' room today. And we need to talk about that later."

"I figured that." He grumbles.

"And if you don't stop berating Kate, she'll castrate you." I tell him. "I think her exact words were that you'd be wearing your balls as cufflinks."

Christian snorts. "Weeellll….she can suck my dick while she's down there."

"Christian!" I fume. "That wasn't nice. In fact it was downright crass."

He leans over and circles my waist laying his head in my lap. "Oh. You know I adore Kate."

"Now you're being facetious." I run my fingers through his hair. "What's gotten in to you today?"

"I don't know. I just missed you."

"Well I'm here…crap! Move." I try to push him away.

"What?" he looks up at me as I push him aside.

"Tommy. No. Don't drink that sweetie." I reach over and take Christian's wine glass away from him just as he drains it.

He looks terrified, not knowing what he has done wrong. "I thowry." He tries to apologize tears filling his eyes.

"No. It's okay sweetie." I reach over and pick him up. "It's just that's a grown up drink. That's not for you."

"What happened?" Christian asks.

"Look." I nod toward his empty glass. "He drank your wine. The whole glass." I'm rubbing his back and kissing his cheeks. "Do you feel okay Sweetie?" I ask him.

Tommy nods that he does. "Christian what do we do?"

"He'll be fine. He may feel a little buzzed in a few minutes, but he'll live."

"But that was a lot of alcohol for his little body."

"Ana, it wasn't a Long Island Tea; it was a glass of white wine. He'll be okay."

I keep inspecting Tommy like he's going to morph into something. "Call your mother. Let's make sure he's okay."

"Ana. He's fine." Christian sighs.

"I peel good." Tommy tries to reassure me too.

"You think you feel good now, just wait a few minutes." Christian chuckles under his breath.

"Really, Sweetheart. Please call Grace. I just want to make sure."

"Good Lord. Okay. I'll call her if it will make you feel better."

"It will. Please?" I ask as I cradle Tommy.

Christian grabs his phone and dials Grace.

"Mom. Christian." "I'm good. How are you and Dad?" "That's good" "Yes. We're going Saturday. Can't wait to see what I purchased." "Yes. Elliott really did a great job. We were in it all day Sunday." "He did? That's great." "Yes. Me too."

I poke him, "Ask her." I whisper.

"Mom, look we've had a little accident and Ana wants me to ask you something." "No not bad, but we want your advice." " Tommy…accidentally drank a glass of white wine." "Not that much maybe half a glass." "Uh huh." "Yep." "I think so." "Fine, but it was just a minute or two ago." "Okay." "Great. Love you too." "I will." "Bye Mom."

"What did she say?" I ask.

"She said to tell you hello."

"Christian!" I'm almost fuming.

He chuckles at me. "She said he'd be fine. Just watch him and don't let him hurt himself until he sobers up. Call her if he gets sick or if we need anything. And keep the wine away from the children in the future."

"Oh, thank God." I let out a sigh of relief.

"I firsty." Tommy tries to explain.

I pull his head to me and rock him. "It's okay. Next time just ask and we'll get you anything you want to drink. But you can't drink out of the grown ups' glass, okay?"

"Uh huh. I done do it agin," he nods.

"How do you feel?" I ask him.

"I hungwy. We eat thoon?"

"Yes, baby. Dinner will be soon." I sit down on the sofa still pressing him to me and rocking him.

Gail brings us a plate of warm treats along with some celery sticks and baby carrots for the children and sets them down on the huge square ottoman that is our coffee table. "Is something wrong with Tommy?" she asks looking worried.

"He got hold of Christian's wine and drank the whole glass."

"Goodness. Guess we'd better get a little food in him to soak it up." She chuckles.

"Am I the only one who is concerned here?" I ask out loud.

"Ana. Calm down baby. All we can do is watch him and make sure he doesn't hurt himself. It's not like he downed a fifth of scotch." Christian sits next to me and tries to console me.

"Can I hab one?" grace asks and points to the warm treats on the table.

"It's pâté. I don't think you'll like it." Christian tells her. "Why don't you have one of the little carrots?"

"Uh huh, I wike it." Grace insists.

"Do you know what Pâté is?" he asks.

She nods and pats her hands together. "Wike dis."

Christian laughs out loud. "Not patty cake. Pâté. This particular pâté is made of liver. I don't think you want any."

"Yesth. I do peese?"

Christian shrugs, "Help yourself."

Grace takes one of the little toast points with the meat spread on it and shoves it all in her mouth with some degree of difficulty. She gives is a few chews as Christian watches her amazed that she would eat it. Without warning she makes a horrible face and tries to rid her mouth of the vile hors d'oeuvre. She doesn't wait for a napkin and leans forward spitting and sputtering it out on the floor before Christian can get to her.

"Crap. Grace. Wait." Christian jumps up and runs over wiping her face with a napkin.

"I done wike it, Daddy." She shakes her head. "It bad."

"I tried to tell you. Next time you don't like something wait for a napkin. Don't spit it out on the floor." He grumbles as he cleans up the macerated wad of appetizer.

"It not good , Daddy." She watches him clean it up. "I done want any more."

"So I gathered. Go watch TV 'till dinner's ready."

Christian takes off to the kitchen with the full napkin and his empty glass and returns without the napkin and a full glass of wine.

"Our children need schooling on cocktail hour etiquette." He grumbles as he falls back on the sofa.

"Well I think three is a little young for cocktail hour." I tell him as I take a sip of wine and continue to cradle Tommy.

"God help me where did all these kids come from?" He leans his head back and rubs his hands over his face.

"Kids R Us?" I laugh.

"It was supposed to be about you and me and romance and discovery and spending all day Sunday in bed making love to you. Now all I deal with is mini erections, thrown up hors d'oeuvres and intoxicated three year old orphans. What happened? Where did we go wrong?"

I stretch my arm out for him to snuggle next to me. "Come here. We got exactly what we wanted and you know you wouldn't trade a hair on any of these heads for a Sunday in bed."

"Try me." he grumbles. Luckily Gail calls dinner and rescues us from the conversation.

* * *

Christian is once again on his laptop tapping away as I finish getting ready for bed. After slipping into a short nightie I crawl over on to the bed and watch him for a minute. "Christian?"

"Huh?"

"We need to talk about what happened today."

"What?" he looks up at me. "Tommy's fine. Just keep him hydrated tomorrow and he'll survive."

"No. That's not what I'm talking about."

"What?" he goes back to his laptop.

"I'm talking about what happened at lunch today."

He sighs and closes his laptop setting it aside. "I figured that's what you were talking about." He clasps his hands in his lap and sighs. "Okay. What?"

"Sweetheart. You haven't acted like that in ages."

"Like what? Keeping an asshole from putting his hands on my wife?"

"Christian. I can take care of myself, besides Sawyer was right there with me."

"I'm aware of that."

"I'm an adult. I can keep a drunk from pawing me."

"That's not the point. I don't want you to have to deal with those types of things. I am fully aware that you are an adult and can reasonably take care of yourself. It's just that I don't want you to have to. I want to protect you from having to deal with those types of situations."

"Sweetheart, I understand that and I can empathize. If I saw some woman putting her hands on you, I'd want to bitch slap her."

"You would? Really?"

"Of course. Really. But you can't do that."

"Why not? I take care of what's mine. You and the kids are mine, i.e., I take care of you. All of you."

"Sweetheart, you are a brilliant man…."

I can see Christian's face light up, "You think I'm brilliant?"

"Don't be coy. You know you're brilliant." I have to give him a bit of a smile.

"Yeah. But it's nice to hear you say it," he shrugs.

"You're smart enough to know that you can't go around threatening to break people's faces. "

"He deserved it. Gardner's as asshole. He's on his third wife and he still can't keep it in his pants."

"That's not the point either." I try to explain. "There will always be Arnie Gardners out there. If you keep threatening them, one day one of them is going to try to take everything you own. Or worse yet, they might actually hit you."

"They are welcome to try to hit me. I doubt they'll succeed."

"So you would rather risk a horrible public lawsuit or worse, going to jail rather than let me take care of myself or ….letting our security do what they are paid to do, which is to take care of the Arnie Gardners for you."

Christian reaches out and pulls me to him, "I know. When I see someone trying to take advantage of you, I just have this overwhelming need to…."

"Come to my rescue? Be my white knight? Save me?" I have to smile.

"I always want to be your white knight."

"Sweetheart, you are. You save me every day of my life." I search his face and stroke his cheek with my hand. "Every morning that I wake up and see you next to me, reminds me just how lucky I am to have found you. Besides loving every hair on your head, I wouldn't have my children without you. You're my gratitude for the past and my hope for the future. You are my world, Christian Grey. Nothing more and nothing less."

"But it was you who saved me. I had no feeling inside. A life of pain and abandonment and meaningless, empty sex with empty women had just made me dead inside. I didn't know I had this thing inside of me."

"What thing?"

"This capacity to feel. To want to feel, to need to feel. I can't ever go back. I can't ever lose what I feel inside. And you're the one who showed me that I could do it. Without you the world is dark and cold and empty. I can't live like that ever again, Anastasia."

"I feel the same way. That's why I can't have you in jail. Besides jail makes having sex particularly difficult. If for no other reason, remember that the next time you threaten to hit someone."

"Well, since I don't seem to be in jail at the moment…."

With that, I sit up on my knees and grab the hem of my nightie pulling it over my head. My breasts fall free; heavy and exposed to him. As I stare down at the bed Christian reaches over and takes one in his hand, pinching my nipple. His hand is quickly replaced by his mouth and he sucks hard. The sensation is painful, almost. As it stirs something deep inside of me, my breathing quickens and I spontaneously moan.

The sucking is replaced by his teeth as he gently bites the erect pink flesh. I try not to gasp because this does hurt. "I didn't tell you to make any noise. I think you should be collared. You need to understand that you belong to me."

I want to answer, but know better. Christian gets up and I can hear him walk away momentarily and return. He throws a hair tie down in front of me. "Braid it. That is if you can after cutting it all off."

"Yes, sir." I quickly braid what is left of my hair and secure it with the tie. Christian kneels on the bed behind me and after pulling my head back by my short braid; I feel the cold metal as he collars me with the exquisite platinum and pearl collar that he had made for me. After I hear the click of the metal, his warm breath begins to fall over my skin and he whispers against my ear. "You cut your hair. You know I like it long and you cut it anyway." He growls just before taking my earlobe in his teeth and biting.

"But I asked permission, sir. I…"

"You weren't told to speak. I don't care if you asked permission. You know how I feel about your hair." He has his hand around my throat as his other hand moves around to press against my abdomen and then slowly his fingers slide between my flesh and the satin of my white thong. His fingers glide between the wet folds between my thighs and I can't help but stiffen against him.

"Fucking wet as usual. You're too easy."

"Sir arouses me. I can't help it." I plead. Christian continues to stroke between my thighs causing me to arch my back pressing my ass into his already full erection. He strokes harder and faster until I am trembling against him.

"Don't come. I'll fucking tell you when you can." He growls as his fingers slip inside and thrust in and out. "I can feel you getting tight, but don't do it until I tell you to. You need to learn to please me. Cutting your hair definitely did not please me."

The instant I can feel myself starting to fall, he quickly withdraws his hand. Both of his hands move up to cup and massage my breasts. "God I love these tits. They're my tits. Do you understand that?"

"Yes, sir. They are yours." I gush as he massages and rubs the needy flesh and tweaks my erect pink, nipples with his fingers.

"Wait here. Don't move." Christian leaves and soon returns. He walks over to the bed in front of me with leather cuffs. "Hands."

I quickly obey and hold my wrists out for him to bind together in front of me. After buckling them, he gives them a tug to check that they are secure. He once again moves behind me and I feel his breath on my neck. "You don't need to see anything." He whispers as he places a satin blind fold over my eyes. In an instant I'm in the dark. I feel the bed shift as he moves away again. Soon I feel it shift again in front of me and the sensation of warmth on my breast as he again takes me in his palms. "I think you're ready for these." He growls just before I feel the pinch of a nipple clamp. In a second I wince as I feel the second pinch on my other nipple. The chain pulls as Christian tugs on it teasing me. "Nice. Very nice." I hear him croon.

Without warning I feel his fingers once again slide between my thighs and I slightly bend forward and gasp. As I do Christian leans in and presses his lips to my neck swirling his tongue over my skin. His hand grabs my ass and pulls my hips to meet his; his erection pressing into me. "Feel that?" He growls. "Be a good girl and I'll let you have it. Would you like to have it?"

"Yes."

"Huh? Would you like for me to fuck you with this?"

"Yes," I breathe.

"How? How do you want me to fuck you?"

"Hard. I want you to fuck me hard….please."

"If you please me."

I can hear his breathing as it moves around the bed behind me. "Bend over." I quickly comply with his demand and soon feel his arm hands as they peel away my panties and then move over my ass. "So soft. So sweet. And all mine," he murmurs. "You know you need to be punished, don't you?"

"Yes, sir."

"Are you ready?"

"Yes, sir. I need to be punished."

Christian removes his hand and replaces it with the gentle sting of leather cat. My breath catches as the strings of leather hit against my flesh. "That's one," he growls. "How many do you deserve?"

"Six. I deserve six sir."

"Well I think you need ten." He grumbles as I feel the sting on my other cheek. "You put your own needs above mine. You know that's an egregious offense. That's two. Count Anastasia."

"Yes sir two." Christian's hand gently strokes over my stinging flesh.

"Beautiful." he whispers just before I feel number three.

"Three." I bark.

Before I can take a breath, "Four." "Five." Shit. I can hear Christian's breathing becoming labored and rapid. "Six."

As I expect seven, I feel his lips on my burning skin instead. The wetness of his tongue glides over my flesh as he sucks and kisses his way across my ass. One gentle soft kiss and, "Seven." I finally whimper.

"Beautifully pink," he growls as his fingers pull through the wetness. But they don't stop. He glides them back and forth over and over until I'm quivering. "Don't fucking come. You wait until I tell you to. His fingers slide into me and thrust in and out. I can feel myself begin to tighten."

"That's it. Get nice and tight for me," he growls as his fingers thrust and circle. "Eight ." I gasp not expecting a lash as he teases me with hid digits. "Oh fuck." I whimper, almost crying.

Christian quickly withdraws his fingers and the bed shifts as I feel the soft touch of his mouth between my thighs. "No. Please no." I beg trying not to break my concentration. "I….I can't…..I need….I need." I whimper. As quickly as he started he stops. "Nine." I almost scream. Finally I feel, "Ten," as the lash makes its final contact with my ass. I finally relax knowing that the punishment is over, and take a deep breath.

"Turn over." He growls at me and I comply. He grabs my leather cuffs and pulls me up to sit on the bed and he rips away my blindfold. As my eyes adjust to the light and my feet dangle off of the side of the bed Christian uses his knee to spread my thighs as he steps between them. "Here." He commands taking his erection in his hand. As he slowly strokes it up and down he taps it on my chin. "You know what to do."

With that, I reach out with my tongue and slowly glide it across the tip. As I circle under the tip with my tongue I look up at him through my lashes. I watch as his eyelids become heavy and his head falls back. A low moan escapes his chest as my mouth slowly descends on to him taking him deep into my throat. "Fuck." He gasps as he cups my head in his hands. My cuffed hands take his balls and gently massage and knead them as I suck hard and move up his shaft with my mouth. I suck hard on the tip as my tongue gently undulates against the underside of his shaft. As his excitement grows his hips begin to gently rock as he tries to move in and out. Grasping his erection in my hands I hover over him and take him in then let him glide out while I suck and pull.

He continues to thrust into my mouth, then as he begins to tremble he pulls my head away and pushes me back on the bed. He pulls my cuffed hands over my head he warns me not to move and I obediently comply. Grabbing my thighs he pulls me to the edge of the bed and pushes my thighs to my chest. "You've taken your punishment, now you get your reward. You asked for it hard." He grins down at me and I feel his erection brush against my wet flesh. "I want to watch you. I want to see you surrender to me." Without hesitation he thrusts and fills me in one harsh move. I have to gasp at the sudden assault.

As I suddenly audibly inhale, I can see the smile spread across his face. "Is that what you wanted?"

"Yes." I gasp again. "Yes."

Christian leans in still pressing my thighs against my chest and begins to pound against me; violently thrusting in and out. My breasts jolt upward and the air rushes out of my chest with each forceful entry. "That's it." he growls as I begin to randomly spasm around him. "Come for me." He snarls. " I want you to fucking come so I can see you."

The pad of his thumb begins to stroke and press against the wet engorged flesh nestled in the apex of thighs. It's all I can do to remain sane as he pushes me closer and closer. I can feel my belly quiver and jump as he strokes and thrusts. "That's it baby. Let me fuck you." He growls down at me.

"God," I gasp, "Yes." Christian leans forward and braces on his palms which are place on either side of my head, still violently rolling his hips. Looking up at him I watch the sweat as it circumvents his neck and trickles down his chest. My insides feel like jelly; everything moving but the only part functioning it the one that Christian is assaulting. Christian is breathing like an athlete; deep and violet and paced. With my legs still pressed against my chest Christian suddenly reaches around and slaps my ass. The sting makes me jump and almost cry out.

"You need to come don't you?" he growls as he continues to force his way in.

"Yes. Please."

"I want to watch you. Look at me. Open your eyes and look at me." He growls as he yanks the chain and the clamps tear away. The relief is exquisite and I try to comply as I feel myself reach the limit.

"I…. I…. Christian," I whisper as my release rips through me. My mind goes completely blank and all I can feel is between my thighs where my body melds with Christian's. I can feel him inside as my body spasms around him. My belly rises to meet his as my back arches and I'm able to look into his eyes while my body surrenders to him. Within seconds Christian thrusts hard and deep and he folds over me as his orgasm takes him.

"Oh fuck," he gasps as his eyes squint closed and his face wrinkles as his body accepts the agony of his pleasure. His body, shuddering against mine, flushes as he surrenders to his release. The feeling of my body coming around his as he shudders and ejects the product of his orgasm is exhilarating. At that moment I feel as though we are one unit, one person experiencing the same thing at the same time.

Christian finally begins to breathe again and his body relaxes as mine wrings out its last spasms. He collapses on me; our chests heaving to try to catch a breath. I lower my bound wrists over his head and pull him to me as we both rejoin the world of the living. Christian grinds his hips against me gently moving his softening erection in and out. His arms envelope me pulling me tight against him and burying his head in my neck I kiss his cheek.

"You sub so good." He growls against my neck as he writhes against me.

"I had a very good teacher." I whisper back. He looks down at me and brushes the hair away from my eyes as he searches my face.

"Do you know how happy you make me?" he whispers.

"Yes. As happy as you make me." I whisper back to him. I can feel him gently moving in and out as his erection begins to return. I smile up at him, "You're getting hard again."

"I know. For some reason every time we play, when we finish, I have this overwhelming need to just make love to you. To touch you, caress you, kiss you." His hands gently glide over my skin and he leans down pressing his mouth to mine as he cuddles me in his arms and gently begins to roll his hips…


	75. Chapter 75

_**Fifty Shades…Full Circle**_

_**Chapter 75**_

"Mama?" Grace asks as she shadows my every move. "Why can I go wif you?"

"Because, sweetheart, I have to take Tommy to the dentist and then to get a haircut." I kneel down to her eye level. "You and I will have a day together, just the two of us soon, Okay?"

"Ukay." She reluctantly agrees. "Will you bring me a pweasant?"

"Grace, I just took you and Tommy to the toy store the other day. You don't need a present."

"Yesth I do. I need one." She pouts as I zip my jeans.

"No. You. Don't." I emphasize as I shrug into my white blouse and button it. "You have more toys than any little girl should. Play with some of them." I tuck my shirt tail into my jeans and thread a belt through the loops. "I never had that many toys when I was your age and I survived."

"Why?" "You mommy din lub you?" she asks.

I sigh and stop dressing. "Grace," I walk over and take her hand leading her to the chair. I sit down and pull her into my lap. "Sweetheart. My mommy loved me very much. We just didn't have a lot of money. Toys are bought with money not love. Mommy and Daddy love you more than anything in the world, but you have a lot of toys because your daddy has lots of money."

"I wike wots o' monies."

"Yes. I know you do, but having lots of love is way more important than having lots of money." I give her a squeeze and a kiss on her cheek.

"Ukay. Can I habe a new dwess?" she asks.

I have to smile and give her a hug. "Oh, Grace, Grace, Grace. You are your father's daughter. But I love you anyway. And, no, you cannot have another new dress." I set her on the floor and continue to look for my sandals. As I do my phone buzzes.

"Hello?"

"Mrs. Grey? Ana?"

"Yes?"

"Hi. It's Lorna. Lorna Blakely."

"Oh, Lorna. Hi. They let you call out. How are you?"

"I'm good. Yeah. They said I could call someone today. I called you."

"Sweetheart, do you want to talk to Tommy?"

"No. They said I could have a visitor and I was wonderin'…."

"You want me to bring Tommy?" I ask, though I don't really want to hear the answer.

"Yes. I hate to ask, but I was wondering if you could bring him so I could see him."

"Of course, sweetheart. When? When do you want to see him?"

"Could he come today?"

"Sure. Look he has a dentist appointment and a haircut appointment, but I can bring him over early this afternoon. Is about two okay?"

I can hear her crying, "Yes. Yes. Two is great. I've missed him so much."

"I know sweetheart. He's doing great, but I know he'll be excited to see you. Can I bring you anything else?"

"No. I'm fine. I just want to see Tommy."

"Okay. We'll be there at two."

My heart sinks, but I knew this day had to come. I know I need to call Christian and let him know.

"Hey babe. What's up?" he answers.

"Um. I hate to bother you with this, but I thought you'd like to know. Lorna called me."

"She did? I guess they're letting her have calls now."

"And visitors." I take a deep breath. "She wants to see Tommy."

"Oh… Well, you knew this day would come, sweetheart." He reminds me.

"Yes. I know." " Look I'm going to run him over there about two. I just wanted to let you know."

" I'll go with you."

"It's okay. I know you're busy. I just wanted to let you know."

"I can leave. I'm not that busy. I don't want you going alone."

"No. Really. I can do this. Lorna probably doesn't want that many visitors. I don't want to overwhelm her."

"Well, if you're sure."

"I am. But thanks."

"Okay, sweetheart. Call me if you need me?" he asks.

"I will."

"Okay."

"Christian?"

"Yeah, babe?"

"I love you."

"Me too. I'll see you at home."

After I finish dressing and grab my purse, I head down stairs to find Tommy. "Gail. Is tommy dressed?"

"Yes. He's in the family room."

Looking over I see him sitting in the floor talking to Jack. "He's always able to calm Jack down."

"Yes. It seems so. I think it's because he talks to him instead of playing. Playing and teasing him just seems to get him excited."

Tommy is in a pale blue Polo shirt and little khaki pants with an elastic waist. He has his athletic shoes on and looks so clean and neat. "He cleans up pretty good doesn't he?" I tell her as I sip a mug of tea.

"Yes. He is just precious. Such a sweet child."

"His mother just called. She wants to see him so I'm taking him over to see her this afternoon about two."

"Oh. Does Mr. Grey know?" she asks.

"Yes. I just called him. He wanted to go with me, but I think it's better if I take him alone. I don't want to overwhelm her."

"I guess that makes sense." She says folding a dish towel. " I'm going to hate to see him go."

"Really?"

"Yes. He's very easy to become attached to. Sort of has that same quality Mr. Grey does."

"I never thought about it, but you're right. You know you shouldn't love him, but you just can't help yourself." I can feel my eyes filling with tears and have to stop myself.

"Well. I guess I'd better get going or we'll be late." I dump my tea in the sink and put my cup in the dishwasher. "TOMMY." I holler.

"Huh?" he answers.

I walk into the family to collect him. "Come on sweetheart. We need to go to town." I bend down and grab his hand.

"Ukay. We go to town." We walk out to the car and I get Sawyer to put the car seat in the SUV. I'll let him drive instead of follow today. Tommy crawls over into his car seat and I get him buckled in. After buckling my own seatbelt, Sawyer takes off down the drive. Our first stop is Dr. Carmichael's. Tommy isn't thrilled with the idea of sitting in a big chair and having someone invade his mouth. But with the staff dressed in festive attire and clown noses, he soon lets them take a peek. After having the happy gas he is more than willing to let Dr. Carmichael fill two teeth after cleaning them, then give him a fluoride treatment and apply a sealer to help prevent any more damage.

For some reason, I make him an appointment for a check- up in six months. Hopefully Lorna will bring him. After that we head to Ron's for a new haircut. Once again, Tommy is not thrilled with sitting in a big chair and having someone mess with his head. I hold his hand through the shampoo and, like we did with Grace, I let him sit in my lap to get the actual cut.

"You know I don't do kids for anyone but you, Ana Grey." Ron says as he combs and trims Tommy's blonde curls.

"Really? Why am I so privileged?" I ask.

"I like you. You and Mr. Grey have been good to me and I like to give it back. Besides you make your kids behave." He explains. "I occasionally did kids at the last salon I worked at. God help me." He rolls his eyes. "People let their kids act like heathens. It's like the inmates in charge of the asylum sometimes."

"Well I'm glad you like my children."

"This one's going to be another looker. How'd you get all these good lookin' children?"

"Have you seen my husband lately?" I tease. "But we can't take any credit for this one."

"I suspect you have a few genes involved in Teddy and Grace. But this one sure fits in with the Grey crowd."

"Yes he does. He fits in just fine." I give him a squeeze and a kiss.

After Tommy is trimmed up we leave and hit McDonalds. Tommy can eat on his new fillings now and this is his restaurant of choice. We have chicken strips, fries and a drink. His meal of choice and I get him some apple strips for desert. Sawyer joins us indulging in a Big Mac and a shake. After finishing we get back into the SUV for our ride to Lakeside.

"Tommy, sweetheart?"

"Huh?"

"I need to talk to you. We are on the way to see Mommy."

"Thee Mama?" he gets so excited.

"Yes Sweetie. Mama is feeling a little better and the doctor said it's okay for you to go visit her today."

"I thee mama. I mith mama."

"Yes I know." I stroke his hair. "Mama misses you too. She's very excited to get to see you today."

"I know. Her lubs me. I fink her mithes me."

"I know for a fact that she misses you."

"I can sthay wif mama now?"

"I'm not sure about that. We have to wait to see what the doctor says."

"I get to be wif mama now." He nods his head.

"I hope so, baby. We'll see."

As we pull up to the facility, I see another big black SUV that looks familiar. The 'Grey-1' license plate gives it away. As I get out and pull Tommy from his car seat, Christian exits the other vehicle and walks over to us, buttoning his suit jacket as he walks.

"What are you doing here?" I ask him as he meets us.

"I wasn't about to let you do this by yourself." He tells me as he takes Tommy from my arms and carries him.

"Cwisten. I see mama."

"Yep. I guess you will." He tells him. "I like that haircut."

"Won gibed it to me." He says patting his head as we walk to the front entrance.

"That Ron's good at cuttin' off hair, isn't he?" Christian teases.

Tommy nods. Sawyer opens the door and Christian and Tommy and I walk through with Taylor close behind. After checking in at reception, a caregiver takes us out back where Lorna is sitting outside on the patio.

"MAMA!" Tommy shrieks and Lorna turns around to see us. Christian puts him down and Tommy runs to Lorna as she gets up and walks toward him. She scoops him up in her arms and holds him tight. I can see tears as they spill over her cheeks.

"Let's give them a few minutes." I tell Christian, so we sit down in chairs a few feet away and watch as the mother and child reunite. "He misses her so much."

"I know. I just hope she realizes that." Christian murmurs.

We watch as Lorna sits back down in her chair still clutching Tommy in her lap. She is inspecting him, kissing him and hugging him. Tommy is eating it up. In a few minutes Lorna turns and motions for us to come over. Christian and I warily walk over to them and sit down.

"He looks so good." Lorna gushes still wiping her cheeks. "Just look at his clothes and his hair. He even looks like he's gained weight."

"We've enjoyed having him." I have to hold back tears as I squeeze Christian's hand. Christian squeezes back.

"I hope he ain't been a lot of trouble." Lorna says.

"Oh, no. He's been so well behaved. He fits right in." I tell her.

"Yeah. He's no trouble." Christian says.

"Baby, you look so good. Just look at those new shoes and those new clothes." Lorna says to Tommy.

"Uh huh," Tommy nods. "and I got Jimmy an a twuck an a doggie."

"Jimmy?" she looks over at us.

"It's a teddy bear. He named him Jimmy." I tell her.

"Oh." She looks back at Tommy. "You got a teddy bear?"

"Uh huh. I did. An I get to go in da poo. I get bawoons on my arms an I go in da poo an fwim."

"There is a pool to swim in too?" she asks him.

"Uh huh. An today I get my teef cweened. See?" he opens his mouth wide for her to see.

"I see that. They look awfully pretty. You're just having a big time with the Greys aren't you?" she asks him.

"Uh huh. I pway wif Theddy an Gwace."

"Who are they?"

"Day wive dare wif me. We pway."

"Oh, I see."

An..an..I got a new bed."

"You did?"

"Uh huh, I did. Da uder one wath too big, so I get a new one. It'th _my_ bed. I done hab to chair wif any body. Justh me."

"Goodness sweetheart." Lorna rubs his back as she intently listens to Tommy.

"Mama come and wib wif us?" Tommy looks over at me and asks.

"We'll see what we can work out, when Mommy gets all better." I tell him.

"I just can't get over this. He's never looked like this. His cheeks are pink and he looks so happy." Lorna almost looks sad.

"Well, he's feeling much better. We made sure he got all his medicine and he sees the doctor on a regular basis. He's doing so well, Lorna. But he misses you."

"I've missed him too."

We are approached by a young man appearing to be in his thirties, jeans, plaid button up shirt, athletic shoes. He extends his hand to Christian. "I'm Dr. Patrick. Lorna's therapist."

Christian stands to shake his hand. "Christian Grey. This is my wife Ana Grey," Christian nods in my direction.

"Hello. Nice to meet you." I stand to shake his hand as well.

"Lorna has given me permission to speak with you. I was wondering if we might have a word."

"Of course." I tell him and Christian and I follow him back into the building to a small, cluttered office void of any décor other than books and folders full of papers. Two plastic and metal chairs face his metal desk and he motions for Christian and I to have a seat in them.

"I'm glad you were able to bring Tommy by to see Lorna today. She has been concerned about him and this will alleviate some of that anxiety for her."

"Oh, I was glad to do it. Tommy misses her so much." I tell him.

"It was very kind of you to accept the responsibility for his care as well as for Lorna's treatment."

"No problem. We can well afford it." Christian says.

"I'm aware of that Mr. Grey. I was referring to the personal expense of taking on the responsibility not the financial one." Dr. Patrick says.

"How is she doing doctor?" I ask.

"She's right on schedule. She is still dealing with the physical cravings for the drugs. But then that will always be there. We are just beginning to delve into what caused her to need them to start with."

"I see."

"Lorna had a very rough start at home and when she left she went from bad to worse. Typical story, troubled childhood, falls in love with a boy that she hopes will save her and when she gets pregnant he can't deal with the responsibility. He cuts and runs and leaves her alone, penniless, jobless, uneducated, no way to support herself or the child. Life just gets overwhelming and then another man enters her life. Another savior. Only this one has no intention of saving her. He gets her addicted, prostitutes her out, she has no way of leaving because of her dependence and he won't let her go. Then there is the child."

"Why didn't she just give him up for adoption?" Christian asks. I have a feeling he wants an answer for himself as much as Tommy.

"I understand you have children Mr. Grey. You know how overpowering that love for a child can be. Add to that the maternal instinct that nature provides and she couldn't give him away. She actually thought she could do a better job and could take care of him," he explains. "then at some point she realizes that she can't. She realizes that as much as she loves him, she needs drugs more than she needs him. Add to that dealing with the needs of a small child. It was just more than she could handle."

"Doctor, was Tommy abused in any way? Has Lorna said anything?" I ask.

"She hasn't come right out and said anything specific, but I believe from what she has told me that there was some physical abuse. This dealer/pimp, Bobby J. as she calls him, didn't much care for Tommy to be around. He was always telling him he was in the way and the child would try to hide to avoid him. On occasion Bobby J. would be rough with him, lock him in the bathroom to get him out of the way. Lorna said as little as he was he would stand up to Bobby J. trying to protect her. That's when this character would rough him up or lock him away."

I can't help but feel my face wrinkle and the tears begin to spill over my cheeks. Christian puts his arm around me and takes my hand.

"I can see you have grown quite fond of Tommy." Dr. Patrick says.

"Yes. As much as I've warned my wife not to, I'm afraid she has become quite attached to the boy."

"Any you Mr. Grey? How are you dealing with having Tommy stay with you?"

"I'm fine. I mean I like the boy, but I haven't let myself get too attached. I know the situation is only temporary and he belongs with his mother." Christian volunteers. "I mean that's what's best for him. To be with his mother."

"Yes. I think I understand." He leans back in his chair. " Well then. I wanted to assess the situation before discussing this. And to preface it, I have discussed this with Lorna." He starts. "Lorna will be doing our three month program. As I said before, she is just now dealing with the physical addiction and getting used to dealing with not having the drugs in her system. It would really be best if she didn't have to deal with caring for Tommy right now. Let her focus on herself and dealing with her own issues without having to deal with his as well. At some point she'll have to learn to deal with the needs of her child and coping with caring for him, but she needs to learn to deal with her own issues right now." He leans forward and puts his elbows on his desk. "I was hoping that you would consider keeping Tommy for a while longer. Until she is ready to deal with him. When she is, he can come to live here at the center with her and we can help her learn to deal with the needs of a three year old. Is that an option?"

I look over at Christian. "Well, I don't see why not. I mean we want to do all we can to help them."

"Mrs. Grey. Think about this. It's very noble of you to do this, but think of your family first. How is this effecting them? Is this good for them?"

"Our children have accepted the boy. They like him, but they know it's temporary. I think it has been a good learning experience for them." Christian offers.

"How so Mr. Grey?"

"Well, they have lived a pretty charmed life so far. It's been a good experience for them to see that there is more to life than their sheltered world. That everyone is not as lucky as they are. They have learned to accept someone and share what they have with him."

"I see. So you are willing to care for him until Lorna can take him back?"

"Yes. Yes we are." I almost jump at the chance.

"Okay." We can go back out and talk." He stands up and we do the same and walk back out to the patio. On the way we pass Taylor who is shadowing us. "Is he yours?" Dr. Patrick asks.

"Yes." Christian answers abruptly.

Dr. Patrick smiles. "Oh the trappings of wealth." He says opening the door to the outside. "No man can tell whether he is rich by turning to his ledger. It is the heart that makes a man rich."

Christian finishes for him. "He is rich or poor according to what he is, not according to what he has. Henry Ward Beecher. Yes I'm familiar with the quote doctor."

As we approach Lorna and Tommy Lorna is cradling him in her lap like a baby and he is almost asleep. I can hear the faint sound of her singing to him as we approach. The scene, brings tears to my eyes again.

We all sit down and Dr. Patrick sits facing Lorna. "Lorna. I've talked to Mr. and Mrs. Grey. I've explained the situation. We have discussed it and they are willing to keep Tommy until we all feel you are able to start coping with his needs in addition to your own. Do you have anything you want to add?"  
"I just appreciate this so much. Seeing him today and seeing how good he looks and how happy he is. I…I'm just so grateful. I've never seen him like this. He is just so excited about everything."

"Lorna, we're doing our best. But what he needs in the long run is to be with his mother in a healthy, clean environment. Ultimately he belongs with you, Sweetheart." I tell her.

I know taking him back is going to be difficult. I know he will want to stay with her. "Tommy?" Lorna looks down at her son and pulls him to a sitting position. "Tommy baby, it's time to go."

"No. Stay wif you."

"Baby, Mommy is still not feeling good. I need for you to go back and stay with the Greys for a little while longer."

"No. No." He is beginning to pout and shake his head.

"Yes, baby. Mommy loves you so very, very much and I miss you. Don't ever forget that. I'm doing this for us, Tommy. So we can live better. You can come and see me now anytime, okay?"

"But I stay wif you." His little tears start to fall and he grabs Lorna around the neck.

"I know. I know. I miss you so much I can't stand it, but it has to be this way. Just for a little while longer. You need to go back and play in the pool and pet the doggie and see Jimmy. And before you know it you can come stay with me again."

I can hardly hold myself together. I can't imagine what they are going through.

"No. No. I stay wif you." He is sobbing and begging to stay with his mother. "Pees, mama. Peese."

"You can't. Not right now, baby."

"No mama. No. I stay wif you." He is sobbing. "Peese. I stay here."

Lorna stands up and tears Tommy away from her handing him to me. "I can't deal with this. Tommy, you have to go. You can't stay here." She turns and runs back inside leaving Christian and me and Dr. Patrick to deal with a hysterical Tommy.

"I'm sorry." Dr. Patrick apologizes. "I know this is difficult for everyone concerned. Will you be alright?"

"Yes. We'll be fine. I'll get him home and hopefully he'll calm down." I tell him.

"Good. I need to go in and see to Lorna. I'm sure she needs to talk about what has just happened." He stands up to leave. "Please call me with any questions or issues. This is going to be a long painful process for all concerned."

Christian and I are left sitting with a sobbing hysterical Tommy. His poor little face is scarlet and drenched with tears. I pull him close and try to soothe him.

"Let's get this show back to the car." Christian says. So we gather up Tommy and head back inside through the Lobby and out the front door after Christian signs us out.

"I know baby. I know it's so hard, but we can go back and see Grace and Teddy and Jack." I try to comfort him. Taylor opens the door to the SUV and I slide in back holding Tommy. Christian gets in the other side. "Aren't you going back to work?" I ask.

"Nope." He stretches out his arms. "Give him to me, I'll get him strapped in."

"No. I'm going to hold him."

"Ana, don't be silly. Let me put him in the car seat."

"No. I'll hold him on the way back. He's upset."

"Ana. It's against the law. You can't hold him."

"I don't care. I'm not letting him go. He needs to be held more than he needs a car seat."

"Fuck." Christian finally backs down. "Head out Taylor." Taylor pulls out of the parking lot with Sawyer following in the other vehicle.

"Want mama. Peese. Want mama." Tommy is sobbing.

"I know baby. It will be better. I promise. Christian can you hand me a tissue from my purse please?"

"Where the fuck is it?"

"Over there in the floor." Christian yanks it open and shoves a tissue at me. I use it to wipe Tommy's face and his snotty nose.

"No. No." he fights me as I try to clean him up. "Want mama. Peese, An. I go thee mama."

Christian is obviously uneasy with all of this. After about ten minutes of sobbing and begging he can't take anymore. "Taylor. Pull over."

"Sir?"

"You heard me. Pull the damn car over."

As the car comes to a stop on the side of the road, Christian opens the door to get out.

"Sir, I getting out here is not the best decision. Let me drive….."

"I don't give a fuck. I need to get out." He continues to get out of the car and pace on the shoulder. I can see him taking deep breaths and rubbing his neck as he paces back and forth.

After a few minutes he returns to the car getting back in. "Head home," he barks at Taylor.

"Yes, Mr. Grey."

"Are you okay?" I ask as the car gets back on the road.

"Not really. No." He looks out his window and rubs his lower lip with his index finger.

I reach over and take his hand. "Sweetheart. I'm so sorry. I had no idea today would be like this."

"Not your fault." He waves his hand. "I'll be okay. Let's just get home."


	76. Chapter 76

_**Fifty Shades…Full Circle**_

_**Chapter 76**_

_**A/N: Quick note, I will be out of town this week and may not have a chapter until next week. I will try to post one mid-week, if I can, but probably not over the weekend. Thank you again for sticking with me and for taking your time to leave so many really nice reviews. **_

By the time we pull into the drive, Tommy has cried himself to sleep in my arms. Christian is a wreck and I'm exhausted. Poor Taylor is about to come unglued. Sawyer pulls in behind us and parks then comes running to open my door. As I get out of the car, Christian comes around and takes Tommy for me, carrying him in the house. We take him upstairs and put him on his bed and I pull up a throw to cover him.

"I guess we should let him sleep until diner." I tell Christian as we stand there looking down at the exhausted child.

"Yeah. He's worn out. Poor little guy." Christian agrees. "It was hell on him today. I mean seeing his mother then being taken away again."

"I know. It ripped my heart out." I rub my hand over his back. "How are you?"

"I'm fine."

"No you aren't. Today was almost as rough on you as it was him." I tell him.

"You don't miss a trick do you?" he pulls me over and wraps his arms around me.

"Not when it comes to you, I don't." I wrap my arms around him. "Tommy reminds you of you, doesn't he?"

"I guess a bit. Our situations were a bit similar."

"A bit?"

"Okay. A lot. I lived in a similar situation, but my dear mother chose to take the easy way out and left me to my own devices. For all she cared that asshole pumped me full of drugs and tossed me in a garbage can after she died."

"But he didn't. And Grace and Carrick found you and loved you, and took care of you and raised you." I look up at him. "Despite all the shit, you came through it. And I thank God every damn day that you did."

"I know. I guess things did work out."

"I think so. And if this is bothering you, you need to go see John and talk it out. It does you so much good when you can talk about things with him."

"It doesn't bother you?"

"What?"

"That I can talk to John about all of this stuff instead of you?"

"Baby, I don't care who you talk to as long as it makes you feel better and helps you to work all this out." I give him another hug. "Besides, you always tell me at some point."

"I usually don't have to. You've already figured it out." He looks down at me. "Are you sure you didn't major in psychology?"

"I'm sure. English Lit. It's printed on the diploma." I smile up at him and he bends down meeting my lips. For a moment they press against mine as they caress each other. "Let's go see our kids."

"Okay. I'm gonna' get changed and be down in a couple of minutes." He gives me a squeeze on my butt and we leave Tommy to rest for a while.

I walk back down to the family room and look around and see no children. "Kids!" I holler. I walk over to the glass wall and look out back and see them in the yard. Gail is sitting on the patio watching them and talking to Taylor.

"Hi you two." I walk outside to join them. "I was wondering where everyone was." Taylor starts to get up, but I motion for him to sit down. "Please, Taylor. Don't get up."

"How's the little guy?" Taylor asks.

"He's worn out. He's asleep. I put him on his bed for a while."

"Rough day."

"Yes, Jason, it was rough."

"If I'm not prying, how's the boss?"

I give him a smile, "He's okay."

"Well. Guess I'd better get back to work." He stands up and gives Gail a quick kiss. "See you at home, baby."

"Okay. Roast for dinner." She smiles up at him as he leaves and walks back into the house.

"I'll go check on dinner." Gail starts to get up.

"No Gail. Keep your seat. I'll sit down with you."

"Can I get you anything?" she asks.

"No. I imagine Christian will want something to drink when he gets down. I'll wait on him."

"Jason, told me what happened with the girl today," she says. "I hope that was okay."

"Of course. It was God awful Gail." I tell her as I rub my hands over my face. "Tommy wanted to stay and Lorna needed for him to go. Everyone cried. Christian got upset. It was just lovely." I tell her. "By the way, we'll be keeping Tommy for a while. The doctor thinks it will be best for Lorna to deal with her own shit before she can deal with Tommy."

"He's probably right. Well you know I love having him. He's not a problem."

"I know. I just worry that it's extra work and Myra will be leaving next month. We need to find a replacement for her. Then Christian needs to have his grandmother come to visit. That will be a mess, trying to explain that to the kids." I give out a big sigh. "God help me."

"Ohh. We'll get through it. I hope you don't mind, but I did put out a few feelers regarding replacing Myra. I haven't spoken to anyone or anything, just sort of getting a feel for what's out there."

"No. That's good. Just don't talk to a soul without a background and a signed NDA. Christian will hit the roof."

"No. I know better than that. As you can imagine, Jason is very particular about it."

"Yes, those two are obsessive about their security." I tell her. "Go ahead and pre-interview anyone you think is good. Then when you've narrowed it down we can talk to them together. Is that okay with you?"

"Fine. I can do that. "She stands up. "Well, I'd better check on dinner. I'll leave you to watch the kids."

"Gail?" I look up at her. "Thank you."

She gives me a huge smile and a nod before taking off to check on the food.

I sit cross legged and barefoot on the chaise for a while watching the kids and the dog play. I love just watching them. They're so happy. I love to see them happy. Not a care in the world. So loved and so cared for. Every child should be as loved and protected as they are. Christian seems to be taking forever. I get up and head inside. "Gail. Look out for the kids. I'm going to find Christian." I tell her as I pass the kitchen. "He probably couldn't pass up his laptop and stopped to work a while."

Checking his office, it's empty. I walk up the staircase and down the hall. As I do, I look in on Tommy who is still asleep. I continue down the hall to our bedroom and look in but it's dark as well. As I go to leave I see a light coming from under the door of Christian's dressing closet. Creeping over I listen and don't hear a thing, but turn the door knob and peer in. "Sweetheart?" Looking down I see my husband in jeans and a T-shirt stretched out on the floor on his back, legs crossed bare foot and his head resting on his folded arms staring at the ceiling.

I walk over and sit on the floor beside him. "Sweetheart? What are you doing?"

"Why do you think she did it?" he asks.

"Who baby? Who did what?"

"Ella. Why do you suppose she had me? She could have just gotten rid of me and carried on with her life. She was in no position to have a child."

"Well, having been pregnant and being a mother, I can't imagine having to do that. I know it's hard to understand, but when you get pregnant, there is this little switch that flips inside. All of a sudden the only thing that is important is that life inside of you. All of a sudden you realize that you are the one and only thing in this universe that can protect it and care for it. It depends on you. Causing harm to it is the last thing you could ever imagine doing."

"But a lot of women end their pregnancies. They don't feel anything. Why didn't she?"

"Just because a woman chooses to not carry her baby doesn't mean that it's an easy decision or she doesn't feel anything. It's an agonizing decision to have to make. Nature provides us with that maternal instinct. If she didn't why in the hell would we gain thirty pounds, watch our feet swell and go through the process of pushing a human being out of our body? But for some women in certain circumstances, it's just not right, for whatever reason. Sometimes they think that not carrying it is the best decision for them and the baby. I…I…..God, Christian I don't know" I sigh trying to make sense of my answer." I just thank God I've never been in a situation to have to make that decision." I move and lie down beside him and caress his abdomen with my hand. "I've had you by my side every time to support me and love me. I can't imagine what it must be like to have to go through it alone; with nothing and no one. Christian, your mother must have wanted you very much to have you and try to take care of you. I really think she did her best. Her best just wasn't good enough."

"If she cared so fucking much, why the hell did she leave me? She just took the easy way out and left me there. Alone. At the mercy of that asshole and God knows what else. If she had really cared she would have taken me with her. She would have wanted me with her."

"Christian she died. Your mother didn't want you dead. She wanted you alive. She wanted you to live and grow up and be happy. Sweetheart, she was tired and strung out and soul sick. She had nowhere to turn and no one to help her. Please don't think about this so much. I thank God every day for you. I don't want to think about you dying. God spared you. And he did it for a reason. He did it for Teddy and Grace and for me. And for Grace and Carrick, and Mia and Elliott, and for Kate and Ros and Taylor and Gail…."

Christian starts to chuckle and rolls over on his side propping his head on his elbow. "Okay. Okay." He looks down and searches my face, brushing my hair out of my eyes. "I just thank God he let me find you."

"Bet your ass you're glad. I'm the best thing that ever happened to you, Grey."

"Yes you are." He gives me a quick kiss. "Now if you just had some hair…"

"Christian. I thought you liked my hair." I pout.

"I do. I'm just giving you a hard time." He snakes his arm around my waist and pulls himself over me. "Unless you'd rather I gave you another kind of hard time." He nuzzles my neck and nips my earlobe.

"Mmmm. Maybe later. We have kids waiting." I get up and extend my hand. He takes it and stands up giving me hug. As he turns to walk out I leap up on his back and fasten my legs around his waist. "Okay. Let's go."

"What are you doing?" he laughs at me.

"Take me down stairs. Come on hop to it." I motion for him to move. Christian uses his hands to support my ass and we take off down stairs. When we get to the kitchen he turns round and sets me on the counter swatting my butt. Peering in the refrigerator he searches for something to drink.

"So what do you want for your birthday?" he asks.

"Oh, I don't know. I can't think of anything I need." I tell him as I sit on the counter and watch him.

"I didn't ask you what you needed." He gives me a quick kiss as he grabs a bottle from the fridge. "I ask you what you wanted."

"Nothin' really."

"Better think of something. You'll be thirty this year. That's pretty fucking old. You may not see another one." He pours two glasses of wine and hands me one.

I kick him with my bare foot, "Jerk. You're older than I am and you're still around."

He takes a sip of the wine he has poured. "Mmm. Yes, but I'm too busy to die. I have a lot to do." He swallows.

"So you think, three kids, a full time job, managing the household of a mega billionaire and keeping up with you doesn't qualify me as being busy?"

"I don't know." He takes another sip and shrugs. "Sounds fairly easy to me."

He jumps out of the way before my foot can make contact again. "Don't kick me again." He wraps his arm around my waist and lifts me setting me on the floor. "Come on. Let's go see if Teddy's had an erection yet."

"Oh. Mr. Grey, Ana." Gail greets us as she gets out of her chair. "You're here. I'll go finish dinner."

"Look at them. Aren't they sweet?" I ask Christian as we sit on the patio watching the kids play with Jack. Grace spots us and they both come running. Grace is just so beautiful; her chestnut curls flowing in the breeze as she runs across the yard. And Teddy is getting so big. He's going to be so handsome.

"Mama. Did you bwing me thumthin'?" Grace asks as she flings herself on my lap.

I run my fingers through her curls, "No. I did not bring you anything. We talked about that this morning. Remember?"

"I know. But I sthill need thumthin'."

"No you don't." I tease her. Teddy makes his way to the patio and leans over Christian's lap.

"Hey, Sport. What's up?" Christian asks him as I my eyes over at him.

"Nuthin'. Just playin' with Jack. Did you see him catch the Frisbee?"

"I did. Did you teach him that?"

"Uh huh. I did. He's smart." Teddy is still trying to catch his breath. "Where's Tommy?"

"He's taking a nap." I tell him." He had a really bad day today. He had a visit with his Mom and he got upset when he had to leave."

"So he didn't stay there?" Teddy asks.

"No. His mom isn't ready for him to stay with her yet."

Christian pulls Teddy up in to his lap. "What's wrong with his mom? Did she have an accident or somethin'?"

"No. It's really hard to explain, but you know how at school they talk to you about drugs?" Christian starts to explain.

"Uh, huh. Did his mom try to get kids to take drugs?"

"No." Christian says as rubs Teddy's head. "His mom started taking drugs and then couldn't stop. That's how drugs work, remember?"

"I think so."

"Well it got so bad that she couldn't take care of Tommy , so she is in a hospital to try to stop taking drugs anymore."

"They have a hospital for that?" Teddy asks.

"Yep. It's a rehabilitation hospital. They call it rehab for short."

"Oh, I heard of that but I didn't know what it was."

"Well that is where people go to try to stop taking drugs." Christian explains.

"Why don't they just stop?"

"Some kinds of drugs, once they take them, they can't stop. Once they take them their body starts needing them and then they have to keep taking them more and more." Christian is trying to explain it to him. "And sometimes it gets so bad that they spend all their money trying to buy the drugs and they forget to take care of their kids."

"Did Tommy's mom forget to take care of him?"

"Yes. She did. She forgot to feed him or make sure he was safe. That's why he is with us. We are going to take care of him until his mother is better and can do it herself."

"Okay. But what if she doesn't get better?" Teddy asks.

"We think she will. But if for some reason she doesn't we'll find him a place to live where he'll be taken care of."

"But..but why can't he stay here?"

"We'll talk about that if the situation presents itself." Christian sighs and tells him.

"But he has a bed and he doesn't eat too much."

" He could sthay here wiv us," Grace chimes in.

Christian chuckles. "You're always complaining that he's hungry all the time."

"Well….he is. But when he eats, he doesn't eat a lot. I mean it wouldn't cost too much to keep him. We kept Jack when we found him." Teddy tells his father.

"Yeah. We could keep 'em daddy." Grace pipes in.

"Tommy has a mother and I imagine she will want him to come back to live with her. We'll talk about it later. How have you been today?" Christian pulls Teddy in for a big hug.

"Pretty good. Dad, I need to talk to you about somethin'."

"Okay, What is it?"

Teddy leans in to Christian and whispers loud enough for us all to hear, "It's a secret. Can I tell you later?"

Christian whispers back. "Okay. We can talk after dinner."

"Ukay."

Gail rejoins us on the patio carrying a sleepy Tommy. "Look who woke up."

"Tommy. Come pway wif Jack." Grace squeals as she jumps out of my lap.

A sleepy pouting Tommy looks down at her and shakes his head. Gail hands him to me and he snuggles against me in my lap and sticks his thumb in his mouth. He looks so tired and pitiful and I pull him close and pat his back.

"Dad." Teddy audibly whispers.

"What?"

"Does Tommy know about the drugs?" he whispers for all to hear.

"No. He's too young to understand right now. We won't talk about it, okay?"

Teddy nods and jumps out of Christian's lap.

"What did Teddy want?" I yell in to Christian.

"When?" he yells back.

"This afternoon. He said he wanted to talk to you, but it was a secret."

* * *

Sitting on the edge of the bed in my undies, I unhook and take off my bra and massage my breasts. God it feels good to get that thing off. Flopping back on the bed I stretch and yawn and it feels so damn good.

Christian exits his dressing closet in his pajama bottoms and stops to stare as he fiddles with the package. "If I tell you it won't be a secret."

"But you can tell me. I'm his mother." I pout.

"That's exactly why I can't tell you." He grins down at me. "That reminds me of our honeymoon."

"What?" I lift my head to look at him.

"You. Stretched out naked from the waist up." He walks over and climbs on the bed hovering over me.

"I wanted to fuck you right there on that beach."

I have to giggle, "Oh, no you didn't." I give him a quick kiss. "You wanted to kill me."

"Yes. I did. But I wanted to fuck you too."

"So did you want to kill me and then fuck me or fuck me and then kill me?" I smile up at him as I rub my knee against his erection.

"Actually, I wanted to fuck you to death."

"As well as I remember, you almost did when we got back to the boat." I remind him as I stroke his cheek.

Taking my hand in his Christian looks at it and softly kisses my wrist pressing it against his cheek. "I'm sorry…..You disobeyed me."

"I know. I disobey you a lot." I give him a smile and a chuckle.

"Yes you do and it's so fucking hot." He moves his face closer to mine.

"Hot? I thought it pissed you off."

"It does. But then I know I'm going to get to punish you. And that baby….is hot."

"Yes it is, Mr. Grey. You know what a bad girl I can be." I whisper against his mouth and run my hand through his hair. Stopping my fingers to cup the back of his head, I guide his mouth to mine. "I can be so very… very….bad."


	77. Chapter 77

_**Fifty Shades…Full Circle**_

_**Chapter 77**_

"Hey, Wake up." I feel Christian whisper against my cheek. His hand brushes the hair from my face as my eyes flutter and I try to join the world.

"What?" I moan. "It's still dark."

"I know. Wake up." He whispers again. My eyelids move and reveal Christian's face inches from mine. The room is bathed in darkness but for the soft illumination from the lamp next to the bed. I can see the glint in his gray eyes and the smile on his face. "Hey, Birthday Girl."

"Mmmm." I close my eyes and try to smile. "I guess it is that day isn't it?" I groan at him.

"Yes it is." His lips press against my nose. "Come on. Open those baby blues again."

"Christian why? It's still dark outside." I grumble as I turn over on my back. "What are you doing up and dressed at this hour?" I bolt upright sitting in the bed. "You aren't leaving are you? You aren't going on a trip?"

He chuckles and sits on the bed beside me. "No. I'm taking you somewhere."

"Me? Where?"

"We're going to chase the dawn. Remember?" he gives me a big smile. "We haven't done it in years. Come on get dressed. Just you and me."

"But the kids?"

"Gail is going to watch them. Come on. Get up and throw on some clothes. Let's go before the sun gets here."

I take a moment to stretch and get my bearings before Christian grabs my hand and drags me from my warm bed. "Come on sleepy head." Christian pulls my nightgown over my head and off then he grabs my panties and bends down letting me step into them. Once they are up he tosses me my bra and I get it fastened and adjusted. After I step into my jeans he zips them as I shrug into a shirt and sweater. Christian hands me my shoes and bends down to tie them. That done, I run a brush across my teeth and splash my face and dry it, then drag a brush through my hair.

By the time I get to the bottom of the steps, Christian hands me a warm mug of tea and ushers me to the garage and into his R8. As we back out it's still dark outside and I can see the headlights of the security vehicle as it follows behind us.

"What brought this on?" I mumble through my tea.

Christian takes a sip from his mug and sets it in the cup holder before taking my hand. "It's your birthday. I wanted to share something special with you. Just you and me. Something we haven't shared in a long time."

"So you thought of soaring?"

"Yep." He grins over. "We used to do it. Then after the kids we just stopped."

"I was up all night with feedings and diaper changes with Teddy, then Grace came along. I guess I was just too tired to get up before dawn."

"Me too. But no more diapers and bottles." He brings my hand to his lips and smiles. "It's time for us to get back to some of the things we shared. Just the two of us."

"Are you going to let me buy you breakfast when we're finished?"

"If you're good, I'll consider it."

We arrive at Bergseth Field and our tow pilot, Riley Sears is waiting on us. Christian checks out the glider before we get in. I chat with Brad, part of the ground crew while Christian goes through his check list. "Why do you do this?"

"What?"

"Get up this early. The sun isn't up yet." I'm still sipping on my warm mug of breakfast.

"I'm an early bird and …it's my job." He laughs. "Besides, we don't have hardly anyone that goes this early. Thermals don't get good 'till later in the day, usually afternoon."

"Why is that?"

"Well the sun warms the atmosphere later in the day and you get better updrafts. You can stay up longer. Most people want a longer flight rather than see the sunrise."

"Oh. I see. Well, we have a thing about the sunrise. It's just so beautiful from up there."

"Whatever. Each to his own I guess." He gives me a nod as Christian finishes. "You have a good flight, ma'am."

Christian helps me into the front seat and gets me secured. Then he jumps in the seat behind me. Once we're in and secured, Christian makes sure we're in communication with Riley and he does his preflight check. Soon after I see the propellers on the plane start up I feel the tug as we begin to move and within a few seconds my stomach floats as we leave the ground. We climb higher and higher leaving the ground below and I listen to the conversation between Christian and Riley.

"Good luck, Mr. Grey. You and the Mrs. have a good flight." I hear Riley say just before feeling the tow line disengage. Riley flies left and down and we go up and right. The sound of the plane is gone and all I hear is the wind and my heartbeat in my ears.

"Hold on Baby. Here we go." I can hear Christian laugh behind me. "Woo hoo!"

"Christian! It's as wonderful as I remember." I squeal at him. The sun is just peeking over the horizon and the blackness has turned to gray with the world taking on a bit of color. The snow that caps the mountains is pink reflecting the dawn and the ocean is beginning to twinkle with the sun's reflection. "Oh, Christian. It's so beautiful."

"I know. See what we've been missing. God I could do this forever." I can hear the pure joy in his voice as he banks the glider to the right and we catch a updraft. "Grab hold of the stick."

I do as he asks and I can feel it as he controls the craft. Within a few minutes, dawn has broken and the day has begun. I can see the landscape below, the trees and mountains and ocean. The sky is a beautiful azure with a few soft white clouds. We soar for a good hour before it's time to land. Christian radios our intent to land to the airport and turns the glider and heads for the airfield and within a few minutes I have it in sight. He banks left and aims dead for it as we get closer and closer to the ground. Before I know it I can feel the thud as we make contact with the grassy field and quickly come to a stop.

Christian pops the top open and climbs out then comes around to help me out of the craft that is now resting on the ground. As he grabs hold of me to help me out I wrap my legs around his hips and my arms around his neck. "Thank you. That was incredible." I press my mouth to his and give him a soft kiss.

"Happy birthday," he whispers to me as he stands me on my feet.

I can't seem to get the grin off of my face as Christian thanks Riley and gives the glider a quick look over before we head back to the car.

"Thank you Riley. That was just great." I shake his hand and give him a big smile.

"Yes. I appreciate it." Christian tells him.

"No problem Mr. Grey. Glad to do it." He gives us a smile and a wave. "Have a good birthday Mrs. Grey."

"I will. And thanks again." Christian grabs my waist and we head back to the black sports car waiting patiently for us.

As we pull away from the airfield Christian lets the top down. He looks so happy. It's the best birthday present I could ask for…that smile on his face. "Hungry?" he asks.

"Yep. Starved."

"Where do you want to eat?"

I give him a quizzical look, "IHOP."

"Are you sure? We can eat anywhere."

"I know. I want IHOP." He gives me a grin and shakes his head as the wind tousles his hair, "IHOP it is then."

We finally pull over into the parking lot of the IHOP on twentieth in Bellevue and take a seat. I order a stack of buttermilk with bacon and eggs and Christian has an omelet with a small side of pancakes and hash browns.

"Sweetheart, this has been so wonderful. I couldn't have asked for a better start to today."

"In spite of getting up before dawn?" he smirks.

"In spite of getting up before dawn." I agree with him. "Hand me the check please."

Christian reluctantly picks up the slip of paper and hands it to me. I take it and give him a quick kiss on his cheek. Sliding out of the booth I go to the front and hand the cashier enough money to cover our bill and then use the ladies and head back to my waiting husband.

"Ready to go hot shot?" I ask as I wait for him to take one last sip of coffee and slide out of the booth.

"Did you get us out of hock?" he asks.

"Yep." I lay some money on the table. "And I'm covering the tip too."

Christian puts his arm around my shoulder and we start out of the restaurant. "Come on moneybags. Let's get home."

Back in the car it's only a few minutes to get back to the house. We slide into the garage and once the craft is docked, Christian comes around to my side and opens my door for me. I'm so glad I married an old fashioned kinda' guy. I like the fact that he treats me like a lady. Niceties and manners never go out of style. As I exit the car he scoops me up and carries me inside through the kitchen door. As I give him another good wet kiss, we hear the kids arguing at the breakfast table. Christian walks over and sets me down next to the dining table where all three are causing major destruction with scrambled eggs, bacon, toast, fruit and Cheerios.

"Happy birthday, Ana. Did you enjoy your morning?"

"Yes I did Gail. I was beautiful. Thank you for taking the kids this morning." I give her a look reminding her not to mention the soaring. I don't want Teddy to start asking to go again. I guess it's okay for both of his parents to die in a soaring accident as long as he's safe.

"Mama, where you been?" Grace asks as we sit down at the table with them.

"Daddy took me on a special trip this morning."

"What kinda' twip?"

"We went to watch the sunrise." I tell her as I sip the hot tea that Gail has just brought me.

"It comed up here too. You could see it here."

"I know. But we had a special place that we wanted to go see it rise this morning."

"I got ce we al." Tommy shows me.

"I see. Is it Cheerios?"

"Uh huh. Cheweeos." He tells me. He looks happy this morning. Almost like yesterday didn't happen. Kids are so resilient. When do we lose that?

"Now?" Teddy whispers out loud to his dad.

"Let's wait a little while." Christian tells him and Teddy looks so dejected.

"Now what?" I ask.

"Just something Teddy and I have been working on."

"Oh. Okay. You'll tell me later?" I ask.

"Maybe." Christian smiles at me.

"We have to be at Mia and Ethan's at five. Don't forget." I remind him.

"I remember. Where is the place anyway?"

"You bought a house and you have no idea where it is?"

"It's more like my accountant purchased a house. All I did was approve the money. So where is this thing?" he asks.

"It's on West Sammamish Pkwy."

"Hmm."

"Hmmm. What?" I ask him.

"Oh, nothing." He shrugs. "Nice places over there."

"Did you doubt that Mia's ability to pick out a nice house?"

"Oh , no. I knew it wouldn't be anything less that spectacular. Especially since I'm paying for it." He takes another sip of coffee.

"You're the one who gave her carte blanche." I give him a smirk.

"Within reason. Carte blanche within reason."

"You can't put restrictions on carte blanche." I remind him." Then it isn't carte blanche anymore."

"Merci pour la leçon française, fille d'anniversaire."

"What?"

"I said thanks for the French lesson."

"What Daddy thay mama?" Grace asks.

"He said, 'Thank you for correcting me my beautiful wife'." I smile over at him. " 'And forgive me for being a jerk.'"

"Yes that's exactly what I said, Sweetie." Christian gives his daughter a wink as he wipes a napkin across his mouth.

"Oh. It thounded funny." She grins and giggles at her dad.

"Can we fwim today?" Tommy asks. "I wear bwoons on my arms."

"Probably not today. Maybe tomorrow. We have to go to a party this afternoon." I try to explain to him.

"A potty? What potty?"

"It's at Christian's sister's house. Her name is Mia." I tell him as I wipe the cereal and milk off of his mouth. "She just got married a while ago and we bought her a house and we are going over to see the house."

"A whole house?" He asks looking at Christian.

"Yes. A whole house." Christian nods.

"A big one wike dis?"

"I...knowing my sister, yes, it's a big house." Christian tells him. "Hopefully not quite as big as this one. My carte wasn't quite that blanche."

"Now Dad?" Teddy asks again.

Christian rolls his eyes, "Okay. Now is okay."

With that Teddy bolts from the table and runs upstairs.

"What's that all about?" I ask.

"You're just before finding out."

I can hear Teddy's little feet as they run back down the stairs.

"Why don't we go in the family room." Christian says as he stands up and releases Grace from her booster chair. I get Tommy down and we head for the family area in the huge great room.

As I lower myself on to the sofa, Teddy comes tearing over to me and shoves a small gift wrapped box at me. "What's this?"

"It's your birthday present. I saw it on TV and Dad helped me."

I take the pretty Robin's egg blue box so perfectly wrapped and grab Teddy giving him a big hug and a kiss. "I love you so much Theodore."

"You didn't open it yet." He growls.

"I don't care what it is. I love it."

"You're really gonna' like it when you open it." He is so anxious for me to see the gift. I take my time and carefully remove the bow from the gift and he can't stand it anymore. He grabs the box and rips the paper off handing the naked box back to me.

I open the box and inside is a beautiful gold locket. "Oh, Teddy!" I gush. "It's beautiful. Thank you Sweetheart."

"Open it." He insisits. I carefully open the locket and it is a trifold. When I get it unlocked and open I see minute pictures of Teddy, Grace and Christian. It's all I can do to keep from sobbing.

"Oh Teddy. It's the best present I've ever gotten." I grab him up and almost squeeze him to death.

"Dad helped me."

"Is this the secret, Dad?" I ask Christian as I wipe my cheeks.

"Yep." He saw one on TV and I had Tiffany make one for him.

"I used all my allowance too," Teddy tells me, even though I know Christian supplemented him just a bit.

"Emmy thee." Grace almost jerks it out of my hand.

"Careful, Grace. It's very delicate." I show her the pictures inside the gold container. "That's me, mama." She deftly identifies herself.

"Yes it is Sweetheart. I can carry you all around with me now."

Christian hands me another box. Opening it reveals earrings. Filigree with pearls. "They're beautiful, Christian. They're very interesting looking." They are drop earrings with a filigree circle studded with small pearls

"I had them made. They are platinum and pearls. They match a certain…ahem…neckpiece."

My collar flashes through my mind's eye. "I see."

"You said it was a shame you couldn't wear it in public, so now you can wear the earrings and you and I will know what it means."

"Hmm. So I'm giving you myself for my birthday?"

"Something like that." He grins and nods.

"They're beautiful." I lean over and give him a kiss.

"Why you get pwesents?" Tommy asks watching the festivities.

"It's Mom's birthday." Teddy tells him matter of factly.

"When is your birthday Tommy?" I ask him.

He shakes his head. "I done know. I need one."

"Yes you do sweetheart. We'll have to find out when your birthday is. Then we can have a birthday party."

"Ukay." He nods and goes off about his business.

Christian helps me put my locket on by fastening it in the back.

"Dats pwetty mama." Grace tells me. I'm sure that's Grace code for 'can I wear it?'.

"What do you think Teddy? How does it look?" I ask my son.

"It looks good. I like it." He gives me a big grin of pride and approval.

I grab him for another hug. "You did such a good job. I'll wear it forever."

"Here." I hear and turn to see Tommy. He has Jimmy in his hands and they are stretched out in my direction.

"Hey Sweetie. What is it?"

"You hab Jimmy." He tells me. "You birfday." I have to catch myself from sobbing in front of the children. "You have Jimmy." He repeats as he shoves the brown bear in my lap.

"Oh, sweetheart. I can't take Jimmy." I reach down and wrap him in my arms and pull him over to me.

"Uh huh. I gib Jimmy to you for you birfday."

Not wanting to offend him and his unselfish gesture I thank him. "Thank you so much Sweetie, but won't you miss him?"

"I can bisit wif him."

"Thank you so much. That's just the nicest present." I give Jimmy a huge hug. "Goodness. This has just been the best birthday ever." It's all I can do to keep from crying.

"Cake. We need cake mama." Grace squeals.

"Well, we'll have cake later on." Christian tells her.

"But I need it now, Dad," she begs.

"Later." Christian gives her the look and she backs off.

I pull Tommy over to me and whisper in his ear, "You know I'm so busy. I was wondering if you could help me take care of Jimmy? Can you do that for me?"

He nods. "Uh huh. I take carw of Jimmy fo you." Tommy takes Jimmy back in his arms and places him a strangle hold.

* * *

"Christian can you get Teddy and Tommy ready? I'll go get Grace dressed." I ask him as he dries off from his shower.

"Yep. Let me get dressed." With that he whips off his towel revealing his naked self and dries off his chest.

"Oh goodness." I turn my head and cover my eyes.

"Nothing you haven't seen before, baby," he smirks.

"I know. Just for a moment there I thought all the magnificence might blind me." I feign avoiding looking at him.

"I'll let you have that since it's your birthday and you're elderly."

My jaw drops and I take my towel off and snap it just flicking his ass. "SHIT!" He jumps a foot and snatches the towel out of my hand. He calmly looks at me as he takes a step toward me. "Those tits are an easy target." He growls as he twists he towel around his hands. Thinking about it, I immediately cover them with my arms. "You seem to need one more hand." He grins at me and nods to my nether region.

"Christian don't." I plead.

"Are you begging?" he asks pretending to be hard of hearing.

"No. I mean yes. Don't." I beg him backing away from his advance.

"You aren't begging loud enough. You'll have to do much better than that." He continues to advance as I retreat. "Please. Don't. Remember it's my birthday." My calves bump against the bed and I turn to crawl to the other side just in time to feel a sting across my butt.

"CRAP!" before I can get the word out, I feel another sting. "SHIT, Christian." Then quickly follows another. "DAMN YOU CHRISTIAN GREY! STOP IT."

"You started it. I'll teach you to snap a towel against my ass woman." He snaps it again but misses as I dodge him trying to scurry across the bed on all fours. He grabs my foot and drags me back to him as I kick in his direction. As I reach the edge of the bed Christian grabs me and stands me up enveloping me in his arms. "Now what?" he asks. "Try and hit me again."

I can't move and finally start to laugh and relax against him. "Okay. I give."

"I thought so." He forces a big kiss on me then releases me. "We'll revisit this later. We need to get dressed."

After finishing my hair and make- up, I sliding into my white slacks and red and white stripped bateau neck top. I find my navy espadrilles and put on the locket Teddy gave me and the earrings that Christian gave me. They don't quite go together, but I want to wear both of them.

It's a feat of gargantuan proportions, but we finally have three children dressed and strapped in the back seat of the A8. Christian slips the key into the ignition and the garage door goes up. He turns to look out the back window to back out. "Holly crap!" he almost shouts in horror.

He has scared me to death. "What is it Sweetheart?"

"There are three children in the back seat." He looks over at me. "How the hell did that happen?"

I have to give him a sympathetic smile. "Wasn't easy." I can tell that Christian is needing attention. He loves his children more than anything but, I think he's beginning to be a little overwhelmed by fatherhood lately. I can tell we need a little Christian and Ana time. He needs to feel like he is soaring rather than being tethered right now. I'll have to give it some thought. Maybe a trip, just the two of us.

"Okay. So what's the address of this place?" he asks.

"Let me see." I look through my purse and pull out a piece of paper with the address. "Here it is. Okay, 5012 West Lake Sammamish Pkwy. Or maybe it's east. No west."

"Ana. It makes a difference as to which side of the lake it's on. Is it east or west?"

"West. It's west. She said the drive is hidden but once you turn in it opens up."

"Hmm."

"What?"

"Huh? Oh nothing. Just trying to place which house it is." He turns the ignition and we back out of the drive, with the big black SUV following behind us.


	78. Chapter 78

_**Fifty Shades…Full Circle**_

_**Chapter 78**_

We arrive at the address Mia gave us and turn in the drive. I can hear Christian let out a groan as he parks the car.

"Hey! I been here." Teddy tells us from the back seat. "I think."

"No sweetheart. This is Aunt Mia's new house. You haven't been here." I explain to him as I unbuckle my seat belt. "It's really pretty, isn't it?"

"I think…. he probably has been here before." Christian rests his forehead on his hands which are gripping the top of the steering wheel.

"What are you talking about?" I ask him.

"I camed here with that lady." Teddy keeps trying to explain.

"What lady, Teddy?" I'm trying to figure out what the hell is going on. Christian gives me an exasperated look.

"That lady that was friends with Daddy. Member?" he asks. "She came and got me at school."

"It's Elena's house." Christian squeezes his eyes shut and rubs his hand over his face. "I bought my own fucking house."

"What?!" I try to whisper. "How did that happen?"

"It was on the market. I guess Mia looked at it and liked it. I had no idea." He slams his hand against the steering wheel. "I can't believe my legal department and accounting department didn't communicate on this."

"I can't believe we have to go in there." I spit out. "We're never going to be rid of that woman."

"Well, we have no choice. Let's get the kids and get this over with." Christian unbuckles his seatbelt and exits the car. He helps Teddy out and then gets Grace out of her car seat as I get Tommy unbuckled and out of the car. We all walk across the parking area and toward the door. "Teddy, I prefer it if you didn't mention being here before. Okay?" I tell him.

"Why?" he asks.

"Because your mother told you not to." Christian sternly reminds him.

"Yes sir."

"Hi you guys. Come on in. Happy Birthday Ana." Mia gushes greeting us at the door. "Well? Whadda' you think?"

"I think you look pregnant." I reach over and rub her little baby bump. "And thank you for the happy birthday."

"I feel pregnant," she whines rubbing her burgeoning belly.

"It's way too early to be complaining. You've got a long way to go, Mrs. Kavanagh." I have to laugh at her.

She gives Christian a hug, "Hey big brother. I'm glad to see you alive and well…for now. Come in and see the place. "

"Hey Tedster. How's it going?" she gives him a hug. The turns to Grace with a kiss, "There's my beauty." Finally she bends down to Tommy. "And who might you be?"

"Tommy." He tries to hide behind Christian's leg.

"Well, Tommy. My name is Mia. Welcome to the fam…er party." She gives him a hug and he gives her a nervous little grin.

"Everybody is in the back yard. Go on out. Ethan will get you something to drink." She follows us through the house to the glass wall that overlooks the back yard and the lake. I want so hard to like the place, but I keep seeing that pedophile everywhere I look. I'm not sure I even want my kids in this house.

Kate and Elliott are sitting in lawn chairs along with Grace and Carrick watching Simon and Trevi play.

"Hey everyone. I address the crowd as Christian gets us a gin and tonic.

"Hello Sweetheart. Happy Birthday" Grace gets up and gives me a hug.

"Yes. Good to see you made it another year." Carrick gives me a kiss on the cheek.

I get birthday wishes from Kate and Elliott and Ethan. Teddy takes off through the yard to see his cousins and Grace gravitates to her grandmother. I have Tommy by the hand and we find a lawn chair and join the group.

"Do you want to go play with the boys?" I ask him. He looks so unsure of everything and shakes his head.

"How's he doing?" Grace asks.

"Seems to be doing fine. I can tell you more later."

"Where's Christian? I want you two to come see the house." Mia is looking around for her brother.

"I'll look after Tommy," Grace says. "I've already had the tour." Grace walks over and bends down to talk to Tommy. "Tommy do you remember me? I'm Dr. Grace. I gave you the truck. Remember?" Tommy gives her a nod and she takes his hand and they walk out into the yard to join the other kids.

"Are you coming Kate?" I ask my sister-in-law.

"You go on. I've seen it. I'll see you when you get back." Mia grabs my arm and we walk over and she grabs Christian dragging us back in the house.

"First off, I want to thank both of you. Giving us a house was just so over the top."

"Oh, sweetie. We wanted to do it." I tell her.

"Yea, Sis. I just wanted you two to have something you really wanted. I'm glad you're happy." Christian puts his arm around her shoulder and gives her a big hug.

"We're very happy, Christian. In fact I can't remember ever being this happy." She gives her brother a big hug before she drags us through the four bedroom five bath dwelling. After we are finished and my stomach tries to settle we both tell her how beautiful it is and Christian turns to walk back outside.

"No." She tries to stop him from leaving. " No, not yet. You haven't seen the basement."

"Oh, come on Sis. I've seen a basement before." He gripes.

"No. You haven't seen this one. We gutted it and turned it into a family room. It's so beautiful. Just look at it then you can go back outside."

Christian and I reluctantly follow her down the finished wood steps to the area below. "You should have seen this place before we gutted it. It was so dark and there was this room that was painted dark red. It looked like a fucking dungeon." She leans in to me. "I don't know what they did here and I really don't want to know. Get my drift?"

"Umm. Yeah. I get your drift." Everywhere I look I imagine that woman here. I wonder where Christian left her in a heap on the floor after Teddy. It made me sick to think about Christian being able to do that to her, but after what she has done to us, she deserved far more. My only regret is that I didn't do it myself.

"Well we took down all the walls and made it this one big room." Everything is contemporary in soft neutrals; beiges, off whites with soft green and brown accents. "There's a wet bar over there. Oh, and look. Ethan had a wine cellar put in. Come back here." We dutifully follow her. "We put in an exercise room and a spa over at this end." She looks back at us. "Christian. You don't like it?" she looks do dejected.

"No. No. I like it." He turns to go back upstairs.

I give Mia a hug. "Sweetie. He likes it. You know your brother. He never shows excitement over anything."

"I know. Mr. Stoic. I just really wanted him to love it."

"Trust me, he does. That's just him." We start to head back up stairs. "It really is absolutely beautiful."

"I can't thank you enough for giving us Liz to help remodel and decorate." She tells me. "The place looks nothing like it did when we bought it. We knocked out walls, remodeled the kitchen and all the bathrooms, ripped up the carpet and put in hardwood, opened up the great room. It's a whole new house." She walks over to the door and opens it. "Look. We even put in this patio and the deck off of the master bedroom covers it. We can walk right out to the lake from the family room."

"I'm glad you like it. I still see the empty nursery. Just yellow walls." I give her a smile. I'm so relieved that the place looks different than when Elena lived here. At least I feel a little better about it.

"That's coming , just not yet. I'll either accent it with pink or blue when the time comes."

"So do you know yet?" I ask.

"Yes. We just want to keep it a secret for a while," she says coyly.

"Well, I'm hoping for a girl. Grace needs a little competition to keep her humble."

Back in the yard and grabbing my drink I walk over and sit in Christian's lap. "Hey. You okay?"

"I'm not worried about me. How are you?" he asks as he gives me a hug.

"I've been better. Christian, is this the house where you …"

"No. God no. She bought this one after she and Linc divorced. In fact it wasn't long after the incident when we announced our engagement. The other house was over closer to my parent's house. Since they haven't spoken since then, I don't even know if Mom knows she lived here."

"Look. Mia is so proud of this place. She can't ever find out about it. Since you weren't involved in the sale, we'll just keep our mouths shut and no will be the wiser." I try to convince both of us. "If we can just keep Teddy's mouth shut. We'll talk about it later. I need to go talk to Kate. You gonna' be okay?" I give him a quick kiss.

"Yep. I need to go harass Elliott about something anyway," he tells me.

"About what?"

"I don't know. I'll find something to give him a hard time about."

"So what's been going on?" Kate asks me as I take a seat next to her.

"Nothing. Just work and kids and drug addicts and lost husbands. You know the usual."

"There's always something going on at your place. Never a dull moment."

"I know. Christian says it's my fault. He says I stir things up."

"Well, you have been known to poke a stick at a hornet's nest. But it's always a very well-meaning stick." She gives me a smile.

"Can you believe we're thirty this year?" I ask her.

"Speak for yourself. Personally I plan on being 29 again."

"Good luck with that."

Kate nods towards Tommy. "So is that him?"

"No Kate. That's another child we picked up on our way over." I give her a sideways glance and a smirk. "Of course it's Tommy."

"He's right cute." Kate notices.

"I think he's adorable. And Kate, he is just the sweetest little thing."

"How's the girl?" she asks.

"Well she's detoxed, but she's a long way from being able to take care of herself and Tommy."

I explain the whole incident when we took Tommy over to see her. How hard it was on Tommy, Lorna and Christian. "Shit. That sounds just awful! How's Christian?"

"I think the whole thing is having some sort of effect on him. He seems to be asking questions and wanting to discuss things."

"Like what?"

I give her a snide look. "Kate."

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to pry. It just slipped out." She waves her hand at me.

"It's okay. He's just thinking about things like why didn't she just have an abortion, why did she leave me, why didn't she give me up for adoption."

"What did ya tell him?"

"Well when we first discussed these things years ago, I had no experience to fall back on. At least now I'm a mother and I can relate to what his mother must have been feeling." I explain to her. "I do the best I can, but Kate I don't have any answers for him. I can only guess she loved him and tried to do the best she could." I give her a shrug. " Then I tell him to go see Flynn."

"GAMPA WAY!" I hear Gracie yell as she comes flying across the yard. Turning around in my chair I see Daddy walking out of the house…..with Myra. "Daddy." I jump up and run over to him falling into his embrace.

"Hey Annie. How's my birthday girl?" he bestows a hug and a kiss on me.

"Daddy what are you doing here?"

"Well Christian said he was having a birthday party for you and wanted me to come. I told him I wouldn't miss it for the world."

"I'm so glad to see you. I've missed you." I look over at Myra. "Myra, it's so nice to see you here. I hardly ever see you at home anymore."

"I try to stay busy and out of the way. It's best that way for now."

"Well I'm glad you're here."

"Ray. You made it." Christian jumps up and shakes Dad's hand.

"Hey Christian. Good to see you."

"Come on Daddy. I think you already know everyone here, but let me introduce Myra around."

I get Myra introduced to everyone there. They already know the back story, so I don't have to go into any detail about how they met. We get Daddy fixed up with beer and Myra a soda. Either she doesn't drink or she wants to keep her wits about her while she's here.

Teddy and Grace are plastered to Daddy. They haven't seen him in ages. Teddy is asking about Fred and telling him all about Jack. Without warning I feel hands on my shoulders and a kiss on my cheek. Jumping out of my skin I look around and hear, "Happy Birthday, beautiful."

"Jose?" I scream and throw my arms around him. "What are you doing here?"

"Isn't it your birthday?" he jokingly asks. "Did I get the wrong day?"

"No. It's today. I mean….you came all this way? For my birthday?" I can't believe it.

"Well, when a man sends a helicopter for me, I get on it and go." He laughs. "Besides I wanted to see Dad."

"Where's Amelia?"

"She had to work. Couldn't get out of it." He shrugs. "So. It's just me."

"Oh. I'm sorry she couldn't make it."

"Me too. But I wanted to be here."

"I'm so glad you are." I give him another big hug and a kiss on his cheek. I can see Christian out of the corner of my eye fisting his hands. After all these years, he still gets jealous over Jose.

Jose gives Kate and Ethan a big hug and greeting just before being led to the bar and given a drink.

Snaking my arm around his waist I give my husband a hug. "Did you do all of this?"

"Well, Mia helped." He looks down at me as he sips his G and T. "You know she loves nothing better than a good surprise party." He gets serious for a moment. "Look. I asked your Mom to come. Even offered to fly them out, but Bob had some golf thing and she didn't want to leave him." He uses his index finger to move the hair out of my eyes. "I'm sorry baby. I tried, but she wouldn't budge."

I give him a squeeze and a half smile. "That's okay. I'm used to it. I just appreciate that you tried. Mom has her priorities." He pulls me closer and kisses my head.

"I can't believe that you did all this."

"Why?" he asks. "I'd walk through fire for you. Why wouldn't I remember your birthday?"

"You just never cease to amaze me."

Finally the grillers have the hotdogs ready for the kids and the servers get the table set outdoors with everything for dinner. Kate and I get our kids situated at the kids table with their hotdogs and chips and milk, just in time for the steaks to be ready. As we sit down to dinner at the adult table the servers pour wine and serve up the individually prepared meat. Mia has had baked potatoes with all the toppings, a huge salad and grilled asparagus for everyone. As everyone prepares to dive in, Christian stands up and asks to speak. "Before we start, I just want to take a moment to wish my wife a very happy birthday. I won't divulge which one, but I'm sure we all know how old she is." He fake whispers, "Thirty." Everyone laughs a little and I roll my eyes. " I can't imagine what my life would have been like without her in it. I don't even want to think about it. She has given me our two children, or life together and her love. Life without her would be dismal indeed." He looks down at me and raises his glass. "Happy Birthday Sweetheart."

"Thank you. I love you." I mouth to him with a smile. After everyone takes a sip of wine for the toast, Christian sits down and we all dive in on the food. It's delicious as only Mia can do it. I'm sitting between Christian and Daddy, leaving Jose to sit by Kate. Before we can finish the kids are through and up running through the yard again. Tommy seems to have joined in after getting used to Kate's boys. Grace keeps whining and begging for cake and I keep shooing her away trying to get her to go play. Christian finally gives up and pulls her into his lap.

"You spoil her, you know." I chide him.

"Yep. I know." He bends down and kisses her cheek. "I can't help it."

After dinner has finished, the servers remove the plates and then bring in a huge cake. It is two layers and covered in white icing and copious amounts of colorful icing flowers and ribbons. It's just breathtaking. As the cake is brought in, the outside lights are turned out allowing all thirty candles to be visible. Everyone sings Happy Birthday and always up for a good birthday, the kids come running knowing that it's cake time. I do my best trying to blow out all the candles but fall far short, so Teddy decides to assist and blows slobber all over the cake in an effort to extinguish them for me.

After chocolate cake and ice cream, I open the gifts from my family. Mostly the usual, blouses, gift certificates for spa days, jewelry; all the things I can well afford to buy for myself, but means so much more coming from people who love me. Finally Grace finishes her cake and ice cream and we all leave the table and return to the lawn chairs and conversation after dinner. My phone rings and it's Mom. "I'm going to take this inside. It's Mom and I want to talk to her." I tell Christian. He gives me a nod and I walk toward the house.

"Hi Mom."

"Hey Baby. Happy Birthday."

"Thanks."

"Baby, I'm so sorry that I couldn't come for your party. Christian offered to send the plane, but we just couldn't make it."

"That's okay. Daddy came….and Jose."

"Really? That's great. Bob had signed up for this senior pro/am golf tournament and he would have forfeited his entry fee. He hates for me to leave him. Besides he's just not very good around the kids. I just couldn't get there."

"Really Mom, it's okay." I really wish she had come, but I've learned not to expect when it comes to Mom and her husbands.

"How are the kids?"

"They're fine. You need to come visit and see them." I tell her. "They're getting big."

"I know they are. I'll try to get out there real soon."

"Just let me know when and we'll send the plane for you and Bob too."

"I heard Ray is getting married," she mentions.

"Yes. He finally found someone."

"I hear she's your maid?" She almost sounds condescending.

"Well she was working for us and he met her last time he came for a visit." I explain. "They really seem happy. He deserves it Mom."

"I know he does. He's a good man. I'm glad he found someone to care for."

"I think they really love each other, Mom. Myra is a really nice person. I'm fond of her."

"That's good. We'll I'll let you get back to your party. I just wanted to wish you a happy birthday."

"I appreciate it Mom. I miss you."

"I miss you too Sweetheart. I love you, Annie."

"I love you too, Mom. I'll see you later."

"Okay baby. Kiss the kids for me. And Christian too."

"I will. Bye." It's all I can do to keep the tears building in my eyes from spilling over. I always hoped one day I'd come first. Just fucking once. Turning off my phone I slip it back into my pocket and head back out to the yard. Before I can get to the door I feel my phone vibrate again. Mom must have forgotten something.

"Hello?"

"I'm calling for Anastasia Grey or Mr. Christian Grey, please." I hear a female voice on the other end. Why would anyone be calling at this hour on a Saturday?

"This is Ana Grey….."


	79. Chapter 79

_**Fifty Shades…Full Circle**_

_**Chapter 79**_

"Mrs. Grey. This is Teresa Sullivan at Lakeside. I hate to bother you at this hour but you are listed as the responsible party for Lorna Blakely. Is that correct?"

I stop dead in my tracks. "Yes. That's right. Is something wrong?"

"Well, I need to let you know that Lorna has signed herself out of the program and left the facility."

"What do you mean left?"

"I mean she took her belongings and has gone."

"What?" I almost scream. Christian looks over at me and gets out of his chair walking to me. "What do you mean she checked out? Why did you let her do that?"

"Mrs. Grey this is a voluntary program. We couldn't keep her against her will. She was free to check herself out at any time. I wanted to let you know. Also she left some things here for you."

"But where did she go? How did she leave? She didn't have a car….or any money."

"What is it baby?" Christian asks as he reaches me.

I cover the phone and whisper. "Lorna checked herself out and is gone."

"FUCK! That bitch. I don't believe this." he spits as he runs his hand through this hair "Where is she?" he asks. "What are they saying?"

"She left with a gentleman who came to visit her," the voice explains. " He had a car and she gathered her belongings and left with him. Actually Dr. Patrick would like to see you. Could you meet with him Monday morning, say around nine?"

"Monday?"

Christian grabs my phone. "This is Mr. Grey. What's going on?" "I see." "When was that?" "What was his name?" "Did they say where they were going?" "Did you get a license number for the car?" "Well do you fucking know anything? I paid enough for her to be there that you should know something." "It was your fucking job to watch her, to keep her there. Instead you just let her walk out the mother fucking door? What kind of half -ass joint are you running over there?"

"Christian." I whisper. "Yelling won't help anything."

"Well you have Patrick call me." "Unless he wants to see the wrath of my legal team breathing down his neck and an investigation of that place you jokingly call a hospital, he'll get his fucking ass on the phone to me with a few god damn answers."

I grab my phone from him. "Um, this is Mrs. Grey. I'm sorry. Could you please have Dr. Patrick give us a call as soon as possible?"

"I'll give him the message, Mrs. Grey."

Releasing a huge sigh, "Thank you." Ending the call I stare at the silent phone, "Well fuck. This is a piece of shit."

"What?" Christian asks.

"You heard me. This is just the worst news possible. Christian what are we going to do?"

"I'm getting security on the fucking phone and have them start looking for that pitiful excuse for human being," he growls as he dials his cell.

"Taylor. Meet me inside. We have an issue." He barks into the phone then disappears in the house.

"Ana? What's wrong?" Grace asks me. I can't help but start to cry.

"Lorna checked herself out and has disappeared." I try to explain.

"Oh, no." Grace frowns. "I'm so sorry to hear that dear, but I must say it doesn't surprise me."

"Well I'm surprised." I snap back at her. "We offered her a way out and she just threw it back in our face. And what about Tommy? Grace what do we tell him?"

"Sweetheart. I…I guess just keep telling him that she is still sick until we know something. I assume Christian will try to find her."

"Yes. He's already talking to Taylor." I wipe my cheeks with my hands. " I'm sure they'll start trying to trace her right away."

"Ana what is it?" Kate comes rushing up.

"Lorna ran off. Christian's organizing security to start looking for her." I tell her.

"Oh, good Lord. I don't believe it." Kate moans.

"Well believe it." I snap at her as well. "I feel sorry for her and on the other hand I could strangle her."

"What's going on?" Mia asks as she makes her way over. "Ana what happened?"

"Oh, I just got a call from Lakeside and Lorna has checked herself out and taken off with some guy." I continue to wipe my cheeks.

"Oh, poor Tommy. What are you going to do?" Mia asks.

"Mia, right now I have no idea. We just found out. How could she do that? God I hope she doesn't try to take Tommy and drag him back into all that mess."

"You should probably notify Children's Services and let them know what's going on." Grace suggests.

All of a sudden it hits me. I can't let him go into Foster care. I can't let Lorna drag him back into that horrible sordid life style. Oh, God what am I going to do? With Lorna gone the state may try to take him. "Grace I can't let him go to foster care, I just can't. And what if she shows up and tries to take him?"

Grace puts her arm around my shoulders, "Just get in touch with Children's Services first thing Monday and I'm sure it can be worked out. I'll intercede if it will help."

I notice Daddy talking to Jose and looking over at us. I'm sure he is wondering what is going on. "I need to go tell Daddy what's happening. I don't want him to worry." I tell the group and make my way over to him.

"Hey, Annie? What's going on? You okay?" he asks looking up from his lawn chair and beer.

"Yeah. You look like you've been crying. What's up?" Jose asks.

"Well, I've explained how we got Tommy. His mother is in rehab and we are keeping him until she completes her rehab program."

"Yeah. I knew that and Myra filled me in on it."

"Well, I just got a call that Lorna, Tommy's mother, just checked herself out of the facility and left with some man."

"What did she do that for?" Daddy asks.

"I don't know the particulars. Basically that's all we know right now. Some guy came to visit and then she got her stuff and checked herself out and left with him." I explain. "Christian is getting security together to try to find her."

"Christian's going to find her. He can find anybody." Jose gives me a sad smile.

"Oh, I hope so. I have no idea what will happen to Tommy. I can't bear to see him hurt. He's already been through so much. I just want him to be happy and cared for."

As we all stand in a group and speculate on what happened, Christian comes out from the house. "Christian? Do we know anything?" Carrick asks.

"Not really Dad. All I have to go on is what the facility told us which is jack shit." He fumes as he rubs the back of his neck. "I've got Taylor started on it and notified Welch. They'll start trying to track her."

Christian puts his arm around me and pulls me over kissing my head. "We'll do everything we can to find her Baby."

"But how?" I ask. "She just disappeared into thin air. How do you track someone who just disappears?"

"Well, Taylor thinks she may try to contact or see Tommy. If she does rear her head we'll have her. Which brings me to the subject of security." He looks down at me. " It's pretty tight now. I just want you to be aware. I don't want this asshole coming anywhere near anyone of us trying to get to Tommy."

"Okay." I sniffle.

"That means no taking off by yourself. The kids don't play outside without security with them. No one gets through the gate without a security check, no matter who they are. Everybody sticks close to the house and if you do have to go into town, you let security drive you. I don't want you driving the car especially with the kids. I'm not taking any chances with any of you."

"Okay. I understand. What about Tommy?" I ask him still wiping my cheeks.

"Christian. I told Ana you need to call Children's Services first thing Monday and let them know the situation." Grace tells him.

"You mother's right, son. From a legal stand point, it'll be better that way." Carrick tells Christian. " I'm sure since you've been caring for him with the state's permission; they'll let him stay where he is. Foster homes are in short supply and you have that document that the girl signed that gives you permission to care for him in her absence."

"Yeah, I'm glad we have that. I'll call first thing Monday. Thanks Dad."

"I'll be glad to help if you need anything." He says.

"Me too Christian. I'm his pediatrician of record here and I'll step in with the state if need be."

"Thanks, Mom. Hopefully that won't be necessary."

"Well, let's get back to your party, Mrs. Grey. We can worry about all of this later. Nothing else we can do right now."

After the evening winds down and I get my last hugs from Daddy and Jose, Daddy is leaving with Myra rather than stay at our place. I invited Jose, but he wants to go on to Montesano to see his dad. I thank Mia for helping Christian with the lovely party and then Christian and I gather up our children. Teddy is still standing, barely and Grace and Tommy are fading fast. Grace kisses each one of her grandchildren as we walk toward the door to leave.

"Try not to worry, dear." She gives me a hug as I carry a sleepy Tommy. "I'm sure everything will work out."

"I wish I could be as optimistic as you."

"We'll do anything we can to help." She gives me a smile. " My son is a very wealthy, influential man. He won't let anything happen to this little one." She gives Tommy's head a rub.

"I know Grace. He'll never let anything happen to any of us. But you know me; I have to have something to worry about."

"Well try not to worry too much. Keep us posted and let me know what happens Monday."

"We will. Good night mother." Christian leans down and kisses his mother's cheek. "Good night sis. And I do like the house."

"Thanks, Christian. I love you."

"Me too. Good night Ethan. Take care of her."

"I'm doing my best, Christian. You all be careful going home."

Finally we get the kids secured in the back seat and we slide in up front. Leaning over I cup Christian's cheek in my hand and pull him in for a kiss. "Thank you." I whisper against his mouth. "I think I really lucked out in the husband department."

"I think you did too." He gives me a sly grin before he starts the car.

Pulling into the garage Christian stops the car and we take a moment to assess the situation. "Well, we have three sleeping children and just the two of us." He says glaring into the back seat.

"Looks like Teddy gets to walk." I say looking back at the sleeping children. "Let's wake him up."

Christian opens the back door and rouses Teddy, "Son, wake up." He gently nudges him and Teddy opens his eyes and stretches. "That's a boy. Come on we're home. Time to go to bed."

After helping Teddy out of the car he releases Tommy from his restraint and pulls him out of his seat resting him on his shoulder. I do the same for Grace and we get our kids upstairs and settled into their beds.

* * *

"Christian?" I call for him as I play with the bubbles that billow on top of the warm water.

"Yeah, Babe?" he answers as he wanders into the bathroom in his boxers and T-shirt. "What is it?"

"Did you really not know that Mia's house used to belong to Elena?"

"I had no idea. Not until I saw it."

"Didn't the address even sound familiar?"

"Not really. I mean I knew she lived on Sammamish, but I didn't know the address."

"But you've been there before. How could you not know?"

"I've only been there once and I was in a blind rage. I called security and got her address. It stayed in my head long enough to get me there. Once I left I never thought about it again." He pulls his shirt off over his head and tosses it on the floor.

"Can you put that in the laundry bin?" I ask looking at the wadded shirt lying on the bathroom tile.

"Nope. Got things to do."

"What do you have to do?" I give him a grin.

Sliding out of his boxers, "I need to give my wife a birthday bath." With that he steps over into the tub and slides in behind me.

Relaxing, I lean back against his chest, "I know you Christian Grey. Giving me a bath is the farthest thing from your mind."

"I'm wounded." He feigns being hurt. "I fully intend to give you a birthday bath. I can't speak to what might happen after that, but I like my women clean."

"Oh? W_omen_? And just how many _women _do you have?"

"Oh. I can't keep count." He begins to run a soapy sponge over my neck. "It's hard to keep track."

"You keep track of every dollar you have; you can't keep track of how many women you have?"

"Two. I have two women," he pauses. "One big one and one little one." He wraps his arms around me and buries his nose in my hair, "You're all the women I'll ever want or need, Mrs. Grey. You know that."

"I hope so."

"What? You hope so? Do you have any doubt what so ever?" he almost sounds hurt.

"No." I reach back and cup his face in my hand. "No Sweetheart. I've never had any doubts about you what so ever. Now the women you come in contact with are another story. They're all over you."

"I can't help that. I'm just such a fucking charming guy."

"You are pretty charming, Mr. Grey. I'll give you that. You charmed the pants right off of me." I snort a little. "What was it….oh yes, 'I'm going to rectify the situation.' So romantic."

"It worked." He chuckles.

"Yes. It worked." I have to laugh and pause for a moment. "Christian? What would have happened if I had said no? I mean you wanted a sub, not a relationship. What would have happened if I hadn't slept with you that night?"

"I would have kept trying. Sub was all I knew. I didn't know any other type of relationship, but I would have taken you any way I could get you." He pulls me closer. "I would have worn you down until you realized that you were irrevocably in love with me."

"I think I was in love with you the minute I saw you."

"I know."

"You knew? How?"

"Baby, I knew business and women. I could look at a woman and know if she wanted me. You wanted me. I just had to figure out how to keep you….and make you want to keep me."

Turning around to face him I search his face for a moment. "It hasn't been easy has it?"

"Falling in love with you was the easiest thing I've ever done." He gently cups my head in his hand and guides my head to his. Leaning in, just before pressing his lips against mine, he stops. "Thank you for loving me," falls against my lips.

"My pleasure," I whisper back just before feeling the warmth of his lips as they move across mine. His hands glide over the wet skin on my back as I open my mouth for him. Tongues in a familiar dance, our bodies press against each other and I feel his chest vibrate as he gently moans against me. Circling my arms around his neck I pull myself closer to him as I savor his taste, his scent, his feel. His muscles move against my bare breasts as they flex allowing his hands to search my wet and willing flesh.

"I want you," he whispers against my cheek as he moves his mouth to my neck and begins to kiss and suck just below my ear.

With that I sit up on my knees and in a practiced move he positions his erection against the wanting folds that nestle my threshold. I slowly begin to sit and allow him to gently pass the entrance and begin to fill me. "Oh, God." I groan as I let my head fall back and suddenly feel the pull as he takes a nipple in his mouth. His fingers splay on my back as he pulls me close allowing his greedy tongue to undulate against the pink erect flesh that his mouth has captured.

"Fuck, I love your tits," he growls against me. His hips roll upward as he tries to push himself farther in and I gently sit up denying him farther entrance. "What is it? What is it baby?" he whispers. "I need to be in you. I need to be all the way in."

"I know." I whisper in response. "We have all night. We have the rest of our lives." I look down at his face resting between my breasts and pull it up so my lips can meet his again.

"I know, but I'm greedy. I want all of you… now." He growls as his lips meet mine and his hands pull my hips down to let him glide all the way in. "Aw fuck. That's it," he gasps. "That's it baby."

"God, you feel so good." I surrender and lay my forehead against his as my hips roll and undulate allowing the friction to build. His hands cup my lower cheeks and he guides my hips to meet his in unison. My lips find his again as he splays his fingers across my lower back with one hand and moves his other palm against my abdomen. He deftly glides his fingers down until he hears me gasp as they find the now engorged bundle of nerve endings between my thighs. His fingers begin to glide over and circle it rhythmically matching his thrusts.

"Oh, damn." I gasp as my body responds to his familiar manipulations. Cupping his head in my hands I pull it close again, and lean in, "Fuck I love you," I gasp as I greedily take his mouth pulling his tongue into mine caressing and stroking it.

His fingers move with increased intensity as my breathing becomes rapid and unmetered. I can feel the occasional spasm around him as my body builds and responds to him. "That's it baby." He whispers, "That's it. Let me make you come. Just relax and I'll do it for you."

I let my body relax and my head rests on his shoulder as he fills me over and over again and pushes my body to the limit. "Yes." I gasp. "Please. I'm yours, Christian. All yours. " I whisper against his neck as my body builds toward its peak under the caresses of his schooled fingers.

"I feel you." He gasps. "I can feel you getting tight around me. Come for me. Let me feel you come."

My body is his and he has pushed it to its limit. Every muscle between my thighs is taut and begging for release. "Christian, I…..I….Oh, God." My fingers dig into his back as I begin to tremble against him.

"That's it." he almost gasps . "That's it baby. Fuck, I can feel you coming all over me," he growls. "God I love to feel you come." My body is fused to his as he coaxes every last spasm that I have to give him. I continue to quiver and tremble as I'm finally able to surrender against him and catch my breath. "That's it baby. Relax. Just relax." He breaths against my hair as he holds me to him.

After a few moments he begins to move and roll his hips again forcing himself to enter, retreat and then enter me again and again. Responding, I roll my hips to meet his facilitating the friction between us. Bracing my hands on the edge of the tub I am able to intensify the movements. His hands grab my hips as he controls the dance. "That's it. God that feels so fucking good." He growls against me and once again his mouth greedily takes my nipple in sucking and pulling with abandon. I can feel the occasional spasm in his belly as he builds. His breathing is ragged as his nostrils flare trying to take in more air and I allow his hands to control my hips as he wildly thrusts in and out. "Oh, fuck. I…Shit." He forces me down on him and thrusts up burying himself deep in me as his body begins to shudder and a flush spreads over his skin. He emits an animalistic groan as I feel him jerk inside me and my body responds with a few random spasms around him. His mouth releases my nipple as he begins to recover and his body wrings out its last few spasms of pleasure. "Oh, fucking Jesus." He gasps. "Damn."

As he relaxes I envelope him in my arms and pull him close to me. The stubble on cheek prickles my breasts as he his cheek rests against my chest and I stroke and kiss his hair. "God I love you Anastasia." He gasps as he begins to catch his breath. "I love you so fucking much, baby."

"I love you to, Christian," I whisper as I rest my cheek against his hair. We remain in our embrace until I feel his erection swindle and he begins to retreat from me….and the water begins to go cold.

"Let's get out." He murmurs as we break our embrace.

"Okay. It's getting cold."

As we exit the tub he grabs a towel and wraps it around me giving me a hug and a kiss on the nose. "Happy birthday, baby."

"Thank you sweetheart."

After getting dried off, I reach into his drawer and grab a T-shirt and shrug it over my head.

"What are you doing?" he growls.

"I like sleeping in a T-shirt, so I'm borrowing one." I growl back and walk to the bed sliding between the covers. The clean sheets feel so good after a bath.

Christian is in his boxers as he walks over and sits on the edge of the bed next to me.

"What?" I look up at him.

"I have something for you." He says as he produces an expertly wrapped box with cascading pink ribbons.

"Christian. You've given me more than enough. What is it?" I ask as I sit back up in the bed.

"Open it and see."

I make quick work of the paper and bow, then open the elongated flat box that looks like it would house a man's tie. Inside are a thick stack of folded papers in a blue cover. "What are these?" I ask as I unfold them and try to read the legal document. Looking up at him with a perplexed look on my face, "Christian what is this?"

"It's half."

"Half? Half of what?"

"I want you to own your half outright. It legally transfers half of everything we own to you."

"Oh, Christian, I don't need this." I try to explain. "Sweetheart, I wouldn't know what to do with this, but it's sweet of you to want to do it."

"I want you to have it. I want you to know that we are equal partners in everything. I want you to know that half of everything legally belongs to you outright. I don't have to die for you to get it."

I throw my arms around him. "Oh, Sweetheart. I love you so much, but I don't know what to do with this."

"Do what you want to with it," he shrugs. "It's yours. I have signed everything and it has been witnessed. All you have to do is sign it and it's yours. I'll take care of the business decisions, but otherwise, it belongs to you. You can keep it, sell it, run off with it…whatever. What's mine is yours….always has been, always will be."

Folding the documents, I place them back in the box and put the top on it. I get out of bed and walk over placing the box in my dresser drawer. As I walk back to the bed Christian asks, "Aren't you going to sign them?"

"I don't need to sign them. As long as you love me enough to give them to me, that's enough."

"But I don't want you to ever doubt that we're equal in this."

Sitting back down on the bed, "I've always known we are equal, but…just in case someone ever tries to turn your head, just remember that I have them." I give him a sly smile and pat his side of the bed. "Now, come get into bed."

As he snuggles in next to me I crawl over and rest my head on his chest. "Christian when are we going to talk about Tommy?"

"What do you mean?" he asks.

"I mean, we need to talk about what we're going to do with him."

"I said we'd talk about it when the time comes."

"Well…..I think the time may have come."


	80. Chapter 80

_**Fifty Shades…Full Circle**_

_**Chapter 80**_

"Ana, there's nothing to get into right now. Let's see what Children's Services has to say before we get all wound up."

"Christian. Lorna is gone. They are going to want to know what we want to do with him. Do we keep him or let him go to foster care?"

"We have no idea where the girl is. She may surface tomorrow."

"You mean if she surfaces, you'd let her have Tommy?" I sit up in the bed. "Christian as I see it, there are two options. He stays with us or goes to foster care until Lorna shows up or until someone adopts him. What are you thinking?"

"Ana." Christian sits up next to me. "Sweetheart, please. I just can't right now. Please let's take it one step at a time." He sighs. "Look. I like Tommy. He's a sweet kid. But I won't let myself get attached while things are still up in the air. On the other hand, I have no intention of letting that crack whore drag him back into that situation again."

"Does that mean that you think you might get attached to him? You might be able to care about him?"

"Ana, baby. I already care about him. But….Look I'm just not ready to go there. Not yet."

"But you said you care about him."

"Yes. I do, but I can't think about anything permanent until a whole lot of shit gets resolved."

" I know. I don't mean to push. I'm sorry." I acquiesce. "I realize this isn't just up to us. We have two children. We need to be concerned about how it would affect them." I pause a bit. "Did your parents consult you and Elliott when they adopted Mia?"

"No. They just told us that we were getting a little sister."

Turning, I sit to face him. "We didn't discuss it with Teddy when we had Grace."

"Grace was an infant." He takes my hand and plays with my fingers as we talk. "She wasn't three years old when we brought her home. Besides we had time to get Teddy used to the idea before she got here."

"I know. But, they've both said they want him to stay."

"Yes, but I really don't think they understand just what staying means. Tommy isn't like Jack. He's a person. He would be a member of the family and that means they would have to share everything with him; Gail, you, me, grandparents…. everything."

"You're right. We have time. And this has to be a family discussion. It has to be something that we all understand and want." He reaches over and pulls me closer, so that I'm resting my head against his chest. "You always know how to temper me. I just let myself get carried away I guess."

"Ana, there's something else we need to think about and it's been bothering me….."

"I think I know what you're going to say. Sam?"

"Yep. I've had to do a lot of thinking about that. I feel bad. Not bad. I mean. I ..."

"I think what you're trying to say is you feel guilty."

"Yes…. I feel guilty. I feel like I'm abandoning Sam by caring about Tommy."

"Sweetheart. Sam is our son, he always will be. Tommy could no more take his place than if we had another biological child."

"I know. It just sort of feels like we're moving away from him…forgetting him somehow. Ya know?" The crack in his voice when he tries to talk about Sam brings tears to my eyes as we talk in the dark.

"I know." I reach over and lie on his chest wrapping him in my arms. I can feel his chest shudder and his breathing hitch as he tries to talk about the baby we lost. "Sweetheart, we can't forget about Sam. He is our son. He'll always be our son." I can feel my chin quiver as I try to talk to him and tears begin to spill over my eyes. "But we can't bring him back by closing our hearts to another child."

"I know. It's just how I feel. I can't help how I feel." He rubs his hand over his face wiping the tears.

"No. You can't help how you feel." I try to wipe my cheeks. "It's just I would like to think that if something happened to me, someone would love and care for my children."

"I know. It's not logical and it doesn't make any sense…."

"It doesn't have to make sense. It's just the way you feel and you don't have to justify your feelings. Not to me, not to anyone."

I finally bury my head in his chest, "Oh, Christian I miss him so much." I sob against him. "I didn't know I could miss anyone so much. I didn't know I could hurt this bad and still live." I sniffle and try to catch my breath. "Sometimes I forget and….and I think it's better, but then sometimes it all… comes rushing back and I don't think I can deal with it anymore." I can't stop the sobs. "I don't know how it happened….or why it happened. I wish I could go back and change it. I wish I hadn't gone up those stairs. I wish I had looked behind me. I wish I had…I wish I had…Oh fuck I just wish I had him back."

Christian's arms press me to him and I can feel our chest heave against each other and for the first time in a while we really cry together.

"It's my fault. I know it's my fault." He sniffles. "I b-b-brought her into our lives and I d-didn't do enough to get rid of her. I was a coward. I didn't protect…. you or Teddy or Sam. Everything is my fault."

"No. Christian. Blaming yourself won't change….it won't change anything. She was an evil, human being. If you could call her a human being."

"But I brought her into our lives."

"No you didn't. She sought you out when you were just a kid. She used you and then wouldn't let you go. She forced her way into our lives. We did the best we could to get rid of her. We had no way of knowing how really sick and evil she was. We couldn't predict how she'd act or what she'd do. No one could have." I try to catch my breath. "It just happened. We may not ever understand why but I do know we can't change it. All we can do is move ahead and remember him. We'll always remember him. We'll always love him."

"I know. It's just so fucking hard sometimes, Baby." I'm buried in his arms, just where I need to be. "You always amaze me. You look so delicate and soft and you have enough strength for both of us."

"Not really. I have you and the kids. If I didn't I wouldn't have survived it." Nuzzling in closer to him. "You're my strength. Always."

* * *

I rouse and wake finding myself still snuggled in Christian's arms lying against his chest. "Don't move, baby. I'll go." Christian tells me as he kisses my forehead and throws the covers off of him. I let my eyes close as he walks out of our bedroom and into the hall, and drift back to sleep. Once again my eyes fly open when I hear my daughter wail "Maaamaa." After planting my feet on the floor I run down the hall and into Grace's room. "What is it Sweetie?"

"Mama." Is all she can get out and I rush over and sit next to her on her bed pulling her into my lap.

"Did you have a scary dream?" I ask her as I press my lips to her forehead.

"Uh huh." She nods still sniffling.

"Come here. Baby. Don't be scared. Mama has you." I stroke her hair and rock her. "It was just a bad old dream. Can you tell me what it was about?"

"Uh,uh." She shakes her head against my breasts as she snuggles in my lap.

"Well, it will be all better. Want me to stay with you 'till you go back to sleep?"

"Can I seep wif you and daddy?" she asks.

I'd put her in our bed in a second, but Christian doesn't like for me to do that. "Why don't we try to go to sleep here in your bed? I'll snuggle here with you okay?"

"Ukay." She quiets and I lay her back in her bed and pull up her covers. Spooning in behind her I stroke her curls and hum a lullaby in her ear until I can feel her breathing slow and hear a little snore. The house is dark and quiet after she goes back to sleep and I'm so tired I just lie there with her. As I begin to drift off, I faintly hear the sounds of music as it drifts through the house over the darkness. Pulling myself up, I cover Grace and give her pink chubby cheek a kiss before making my way to the door and down the hall. As I near the staircase I can hear the piano. Christian must be playing.

I love to hear him play. Unfortunately, other than playing for the children on occasion, he usually reserves his talent for times when he is stressed or troubled. Making my way down the stairs I follow the melody to the front room where the piano resides. Peering in I can see his bare chest in the faint light that the moon has spilled over into the room. His eyes are closed as he intently moves with the piano strokes. I stop and just listen for a few moments, then take a step into the room. As I walk closer Christian opens his eyes and looks at me giving me a sweet smile and shakes his head as if telling me everything is fine. As I creep a few steps forward I finally see the curly blond hair that is leaning against Christian's chest. A few more and I see Tommy's face. He is intently watching Christian's fingers manipulate the black and white keys producing the simple melody of, Rainbow Connection. I can barely hear Christian quietly singing as he plays. Tommy's eye lids look heavy and he rubs them with the back of his hands as he rests against Christian and yawns.

I need to let Christian take care of this, so giving him a smile and mouthing 'I love you', I turn and walk back up the staircase leaving him to soothe Tommy in his own way. I check in on Grace and she is still asleep. Then taking a quick peek at Teddy, I pull his covers up and kiss his head. Creeping back into our bed I wait for Christian to come back. In a few minutes, I feel the bed shift as Christian slides in next to me and drapes himself over me. "Did you get him back to sleep?"

"Yeah," he sighs. "I think it was another bad dream."

"Thanks."

"Was Grace okay?" he asks.

"Yeah. Bad dream too. I think it was too may hot dogs and too much cake and excitement."

"You're probably right." He gives me a kiss on my neck. " I can't sleep after I've eaten too many hot dogs either."

I giggle a bit. "You're crazy."

"I know." He takes a deep breath. "I think I'll start teaching Tommy how to pee tomorrow. I tried a few minutes ago, but he was still too sleepy."

Pulling his hand up to my face I press my lips to his fingers then snuggle it against my breasts. "I love you."

_**A/N: Sorry for the short chapter, but is just ended there. Made sense to pick up in a new chapter. **_


	81. Chapter 81

_**Fifty Shades…Full Circle**_

_**Chapter 81**_

"Please have a seat." Dr. Patrick motions to the two plastic and steel chairs across from his desk. Christian and I take our respective seats facing him. Poor Christian looks like an adult trying to sit in a child's chair.

"What the fuck happened? Why did you let her walk out of here?" Christian begins to attack Dr. Patrick. I gently place my hand on his thigh and take his hand.

"I think we're concerned that she left and we have no idea where she is." I try to temper his tone.

"I understand." He nods to us." Ms. Blakely was not under arrest. This is a voluntary program. She was free to leave at any time. The only thing holding her here was the promise of sobriety and the hope for a new life with her son."

"But …..can you tell us what happened?" I try to keep my patience.

"It was late Saturday and I was not here. I can only tell you what the counselors documented and that is that a gentleman came to the reception desk asking for her. He was told that the patients are here under confidentiality and we could not tell him if Lorna was here or not. He said that Lorna had contacted him on Friday and told him that she was here and asked that he come and get her."

"But how? I thought their calls were monitored." I ask him.

"They are. Evidently someone slipped in a cell phone or she had someone on the outside get in touch with him for her. Either way we do our best, but occasionally they find a way to get a message out," he explains. "She got in touch with him. He showed up. She checked herself out and left with him."

"And she left no information about where she was going?" Christian asks.

"She left a couple of envelopes. One addressed to Mrs. Grey and one addressed to Tommy." He produces the white envelopes and hands them to us.

"What are you doing? I ask Christian as he starts to trip open the one addressed to Tommy.

"I'm going to see if there is anything in here telling us where she is."

"But that's addressed to Tommy. It's his Christian. Let's see what's in mine before we rip into his." This garner's me an eye roll from my husband.

"Okay. Open yours."

Opening the envelope I take out the folded paper with hen scratch on it and try to read it.

_Ana Grey_

_I do not know what to say ekcept thank you. _

"Ana, read it out loud." Christian asks.

"Oh. Okay. I'll try. It's hard to make it out." I try to read the hen scratch and poor grammar.

"_Ana Grey. I do not know what to say ekcept thank you. You are the first person to ever really make me feel like you care about me. I want to thank you for the chance and for beleving in me. I am sorry that i let you down. I have really tried but i just can not do it anymore. I tried for Tommy. I want a better life for him. After you brung him to see me last week and I see how good he looks I know he is better where he is now than with me."_ I gasp as I read the words and try not to cry as I reach over for Christian's hand and try to continue. _"He look so happy and healthy and it makes me happy to see him like that. I know he will be better off with you and your family than with me. You can bring him up good and give him what I can not. I left a letter for him to have when he gets older if he ask about me. If he ask before he can read it tell him i love him and i only try to do what i think is best for him."_ I can hardly see the writing for the tears in my eyes. _"He is my heart and my shiny little star." My resolve melts and I dissolve into sobs as I continue. " I have nothing to give him that is worth anything but can you give him this ring. It is plastic but it is the only wedding ring i ever got. Maybe he will remember me by that. I know you will learn to love him and take care of him. Thank you for all you and Mr. Grey done for us. Tell tommy i love and miss him and he is always in my heart. Lorna Blakely"_

I burst into sobs after trying to read the letter. "Oh, Christian. This is just so horrible. How can she leave him?" I look over into his eyes. "She must be in so much pain. What is going to happen to her? And to Tommy?"

Christian reaches over and puts his arm around me. "We'll figure it out."

Dr. Patrick hands me a box of tissues and I take one wiping my face. "Mr. Grey, Mrs. Grey. I need to let you know that we had to notify Child Services. It was our understanding that the child was not taken into state custody on the sole condition that Lorna completes the program here. Since she eloped, I was obligated to notify them."

"That's fine. We were going to call them ourselves today after we met with you." Christian tells him.

"Good. I spoke with his case worker. Let me see." He looks across his desk and picks up a post it. "Here it is. A Margaret Collins. I was told she's his caseworker." He hands us the paper with her name and number on it.

"Well. What now?" Christian asks him.

"Dr. Patrick? What will happen to her?" I sniffle as though he has an answer.

"Well. There's nothing we can do. If she turns up and wants to come back, we'll certainly be willing to give it another try. Don't be too surprised. Some people go through these programs multiple times before finally getting sober. It could still happen."

"I have a security team looking for her Dr. Patrick. Anything that you or your staff could remember would be very helpful," Christian tells him.

"We'll do our best, but there really wasn't much. I'm afraid they didn't get a license number and the gentleman..'

"Would you please stop referring to him as a gentleman?" I snap at him. "There's nothing about him that's a gentleman."

"I'm sorry Mrs. Grey. I understand that this must be upsetting."

"Upsetting is an understatement." I spit at him.

"I can understand how you must be feeling. I suggest you speak with the child's social worker and proceed as you see best. According to this letter, Lorna has no intention of coming back for him. At least not now."

"But what will happen to her? What will happen to Lorna?" I can't help but continue to sob.

"Mrs. Grey. I can't tell you that, no one can. I will say that the outlook isn't positive unless she can get somewhere and get clean and sober. Basically, she will clean herself up or…or she won't make it very long," he tells me. "Unfortunately addicts that live on the street like that don't have a very good prognosis."

"I just can't bear to think of her with that horrible man." I try to stop my tears without much success.

"Well unfortunately, that was Lorna's choice to make. At least you and Mr. Grey gave her a choice. Before you came along she didn't really have one."

"Well. Thank you Dr. Patrick. Will it be alright if my chief of security asks your staff a few questions? Maybe he can jog their memory and get something to go on."

"It's fine with me Mr. Grey. They can tell you anything as long as it doesn't involve another resident."

"Good. His name is Jason Taylor. I'm sure he won't be too intrusive." Christian extends is hand as he gets up. "Thank you doctor."

Christian helps me to my feet and puts his arm around my waist. "Yes. Thank you Dr. Patrick. We appreciate everything you've done."

"You are more than welcome." He shakes my hand as we turn to leave. "I'm just sorry it didn't work out. But don't give up yet. She could come to her senses and try to contact you."

"Not likely." Christian mentions.

"Yes. Mr. Grey. Unfortunately, it's not likely." Dr. Patrick agrees.

"Well, I guess we need to contact this Margaret Collins." Christian grumbles as we slide into the back of the SUV.

"I can do it Sweetheart. I know you must need to get back to work."

"Are you sure?" he asks.

I give him a nod. "Yes. I can do it."

"Okay. I'll contact legal when I get back to the office and get them in the loop on this."

"What does a team of corporate lawyers know about custody issues?" I ask him.

"They know who to call and bring in on the issue." Christian leans over and wipes my cheeks with his fingers. "Please don't cry. I hate to see you cry."

"I can't help it. I just feel so sorry for her. I can't imagine giving up your child."

"At least she made sure he was safe and left him something. She didn't just off herself and leave him to face everything alone."

"I know. But what is going to happen to her? I can't bear to think of her with that person. God only knows what she's going through."

"I know baby." He takes my hand. "But she took time to write out those letters. She must have thought about this. She made that decision." He gives me a quick kiss.

"I guess you're right. Oh, Christian I hope we can find her."

"Do you?" he asks.

"Of course I do." I can't believe he asked me that.

"At least we know Tommy is safe with her gone."

"But Christian, he needs his mother. This is so unfair to him."

"In the long run maybe it's not. He'll probably do better without her."

"Given the chance would you rather be where you are or have your mother back?" I almost snap at him.

"Everything in my life brought me to you. I wouldn't trade you for anything or anyone. Not even her."

"I'm sorry that was an awful thing to say. I didn't mean it. I just don't understand it."

"It's nothing I haven't asked myself a thousand times. And the answer is always the same. You and the kids mean more to me than anything I gave up in my past. Everything I've been through, every path I've chosen, every decision I've ever made was worth it."

All I can muster is a smile and a nod.

Christian takes out his phone and begins working away while Taylor drives me back to the house. After dropping me off he will take Christian to the office and then go back to Lakeside to talk to the staff there.

"How'd it go?" Gail asks me as she hands me a mug of hot tea.

"It went. She checked herself out and left with some guy. She left me a letter telling me that Tommy would be better off with us and that's what she wanted for him."

"Oh, my. I just don't understand what motivates people. Why they do what they do. I can't imagine just giving away a sweet child like that." Gail sighs and thinks for a moment. "I will say it's probably the best thing that could have happened to him."

"No. The best thing would have been for her to stick it out and get herself together and raise her son. Tommy now is without a mother."

"Is he?" Gail asks.

"I know what you're going to say, but there's a lot involved. I'm not sure that we can keep him." I feel like crying.

"Well, why not?"

"Because there is a lot to consider. It has to be right for all of us. Christian, the kids, me, and Tommy. It has to be the right thing for him to stay here."

"Why wouldn't it be right for him to stay here?"

"Oh, I don't know. It's just a fucking mess, Gail. I need to go call this lady at the state to see about what we need to do now that his mother has abandoned him. I'm going up and change first." Grabbing my mug I head for the stairs.

After changing into my jeans I head for Christian's office and after rummaging through his desk, I finally locate the combination to his safe. Using the piece of paper I carefully enter the code and turn the handle. It clicks and the door pops open. I pull it wider and deposit the two letters that Lorna left for safe keeping.

As I go to close the door I notice the black velvet and leather box. Taking it out I run my hand over it trying to decide if I want to open it. Then gently lifting the top, it slowly reveals the golden pearl and yellow diamond necklace that Christian gave me for our anniversary last year. It's still as breathtakingly beautiful as I remember and I gently take it from its resting place and hold it in my hand feeling the coldness of the pearls and admiring the incredible natural yellow diamond. As I inspect it, I notice a few specks of brown on the silk thread that is knotted between the pearls. I recognize it. It's dried blood. It's my blood. It's Sam's blood.

My eyes are suddenly flooded with tears as I remember the last time I wore this. The whole evening begins to flash across my mind. The event at Escala. The beautiful dress that I bought especially to go with the necklace. I thought it disguised my huge belly, but didn't really. Needing to go to the bathroom so badly I couldn't wait in the line downstairs. I remember the sight of my husband below me in his tux, champagne in hand talking to a group of acquaintances. Then him looking up at me and his expression changing suddenly as he threw his glass and raced for the staircase. I remember tripping and falling. Then the pain. The horrible pain and the blood. Why is there so much blood? What's wrong? Christian what happened? Make the pain go away, please. Why is there so much blood? Christian help me. Christian take care of Sam. Love Sam for me. I love you. Then the empty cold darkness for so long.

"Ana. Sweetheart, what's wrong?" I can faintly hear Gail, but I can't stop staring at the memory that my fingers are clutching. Gail wraps her arm around my shoulder and tries to take the necklace from me.

"No. It's mine." I clutch it tighter and press it to my chest as I sob.

"Ana. Dear. You're upset. You're trembling. Come with me." Gail keeps me in her arms and leads me upstairs then helps me onto the bed. "Ana. Can you give me the necklace?" Gail carefully asks as she sits on the edge of the bed.

"No." I clutch it tighter as I tremble and cry.

Picking up the phone I can hear her dial and then quietly talking. "I hate to bother you, but….well…it's Mrs. Grey." "It's Ana. She was in the safe and found her necklace. I'm afraid it's upset her, Mr. Grey." "Yes. I've put her to bed, but…well.." "Oh, yes if you could. I think she needs you." "Yes sir. I will." "Thank you Mr. Grey." Gail places the phone back on the nightstand and I can feel her hand as it strokes over my hair. "Ana. Mr. Grey is on his way. Just try to calm down and relax. "

I try to nod as I tremble and weep, still clutching what I have left of Sam. "Do you want one of those anxiety pills? It might help," she asks.

"No." I whisper. "I'm fine. I just want to lie here, please."

"Ana, I can't leave the kids alone for too long. Will you be okay while I check on them?" Gail asks as she rubs my back in the darkened room.

"I'm fine. Go be with the kids." Gail puts a throw over me and walks to the door. "Close the door please," I ask her never looking up.

Gail quietly closes the door and then the sobbing begins. The crying and wailing and asking why. What did we do? Why was he taken from us? I just want him in my arms. I just wanted to hold him and take in his baby smell and feel the soft down that covered his head. I needed to feel him settle against me knowing he was safe in my arms. I just needed to have him. Just for a while. Just for a little while. Just long enough to ease the ache of my empty arms. Just long enough for me to know him and for him to know how much I love him. God I'm so tired of carrying this pain. I don't want it any more. But I can't make the pain go away without losing the memory of him. The only way to keep him is to keep the pain. I'm just so tired. Just so tired. So tired….

"Ana?" I hear Christian whisper against my cheek as my eyes flutter open. "Sweetheart. Let me have the necklace. Please." I can feel him try to pry it out of my fingers, but I clasp it firmly.

"No. It's mine." I whisper.

"I know it's yours, baby, but let me put it away for you. Okay?" he quietly pleads with me. I slowly relinquish my hold on it and Christian takes it from me. "That's better," he whispers again.

Turning over I look up at him sitting on the edge of the bed. "I'm sorry." I sit up in bed. "I just got a little upset. I'm fine."

"Baby what were you doing in the safe?"

"I just thought those letters that Lorna left would be safe there in case we needed them."

"Okay." He slowly inspects the necklace in his hand. "I'm sorry you found this."

"It's okay. I had forgotten it was in there. I just took it out to look at it and saw the dried blood."

"Fucking jeweler. He was supposed to have thoroughly cleaned it," he growls. "I told him if he couldn't get it all off to restring it."

"It's not his fault. It's just a small amount." I plead the jeweler's case. "In fact I sort of like having it there. It's a part of him that I can keep."

"I think we need to have it restrung. We can talk about it later."

"We can talk about it but please don't do it without asking me first. Please?"

" If that's what you want."

"Yes. I do. What are you doing home? I thought you had a lot going on at work?"

"Gail didn't know what to do for you so she called me. I had Andrea move everything on my calendar this afternoon and I came home." He brushes my hair out of my face and tucks a strand behind my ear.

"Thank you, but I'm fine. I just had a moment." I try to explain. "You know how that is. Sometimes it just hits you."

"Yep. I know." He gives me a little smile. "I'm glad you're feeling better."

"Crawl up here with me?" I nod to the empty bed beside me. Christian takes off his jacket and kicks off his shoes, then crawls over next to me and I snuggle in against him.

"Better?" he asks as he loosens his tie and opens his collar with is free hand.

"Yes. Much. Thank you."

"For what?"

"For coming home. I would have been fine, but I'm glad you're here."

"I'm always here for you. But I do have some, unpleasant news."

"What?" I look up at him. "How unpleasant?"

"I'm going to have to go to New York later this week. I need to check in on the properties that we got from the Vanderberg deal." He plays with my fingers." I haven't seen them since the acquisition and I need to go smooth some feathers."

"What kind of properties?"

"Oh, a couple of corporate office buildings, a high rise or two in downtown Manhattan. Some rather prestigious apartment buildings. We acquired the property management company as well. I've rebranded it all and need to show my face."

"You own all that?"

"We own all that. Baby, that's a drop in the bucket of what we own. Thirty seven billion dollars buys quite a bit."

"Oh. Will you be gone long?" I ask.

"Thirty seven billion dollars just doesn't impress you at all does it?"

"Christian I have no concept of thirty seven billion dollars. I just know we have a lot of money." I tell him. "All I care about right now is how long will you be gone?"

"Shouldn't be too long. Just a couple of days. Want to go with me?"

"Yes. But I can't. I have work and I don't want to go off and leave the kids in the middle of this mess."

"Sure? It would be fun. Just the two of us. We can go to dinner. Take in a play. Fool around in peace and quiet. We haven't been to the apartment there in ages."

"Thanks. I'll give it due consideration, Mr. Grey."

"I'll leave the offer on the table if you change your mind."

"Okay. It does sound tempting." I have to snort. "I love the way you call it an apartment. An apartment has two bedrooms, a living room and a kitchen. The New York place is a mansion in the sky."

"It's a mansion with a view of Central Park and the city. The view alone is worth a few million. Doesn't hurt that we own the building it's attached to either."

"We own too much. What are we going to do with all that? We own stuff we don't even know about."

"I know about it. I know exactly what we have and where it is. Don't concern yourself over it. I'll take care of everything, Baby."

"Christian? Have you ever thought of writing a book?

"A book? Fuck no."

"Why not?" I look up at him.

"Got nothing to say," he shrugs.

"Yes you do. You're a brilliant businessman. You should write about that."

"First of all, I don't write. Second, what I know about business comes from my gut and I have no interest in sharing it with anyone." He kisses my forehead. "Besides if I did, it would go to Grey Publishing, not South Atlantic. So just get it off your mind."

"Okay. It was just an idea. You could write about economics or finance or…"

"Ana. No. No book."

"Okay." For some reason just lying in his arms and is calming. I feel safe here. I feel at home here. The world seems at peace here. Just the small talk is comforting and familiar.

"Christian? If things hadn't turned out the way they did, do you think we would have tried to have another baby?"

"I don't know, Sweetheart. That would have been up to you. It was your little body that had to do all the work. I just had two jobs."

"Two?"

"Yep. Getting the deed done. Then keeping you happy until they exited the ship and landed on earth."

"Getting the deed done?"

"That was the fun part. But as I remember when we discussed it, you weren't too keen on the idea to start with."

"It wasn't that. I really sort of liked the idea of another child. It's just we had just gotten Grace out of diapers and I really wanted to go back to work. Another baby meant diapers and bottles and nights with no sleep and having to be home on a schedule so I wouldn't leak all over Seattle."

He laughs, "Yeah, you were a high producer as I recall."

I smirk and smack him. "It was good for the babies."

"It was pretty good for me, too. I mean your tits were out to here." He holds his hands out a foot in front of his chest. "Yep. Old Christian was reaping the benefits there for a while."

"I thought you liked my breasts."

"Oh, I do. No complaints here what so ever."

"You know Christian. I thought having Tommy here would be hard on you and it worried me. I never want to hurt you or cause you any discomfort or pain. But it looks like I'm the one having trouble with it. I had no idea it would bring up so many issues over Sam. I thought I had put all that to rest."

"Baby, it hasn't been that long ago. You're allowed to grieve and be sad when you need to."

"I know. I just wasn't expecting to react like this. For some reason having a third child in our home reminds me of Sam not being here. He was supposed to be our third."

"He is our third. Tommy was just sort of an unplanned surprise. Just like all of our other children."

"Our other children?" I sit up and look at him. "Does that mean you want him to be ours?"

"Well," He scratches the back of his neck and runs his hand through his hair, "we never planned any of the rest, they just sort of popped up when we least expected them. Why should Tommy be any different? Maybe he was meant to be here. What do you think?"

"I don't know. I'm scared. I mean I fell in love with him as soon as I met him, but now that this might become real….I. It's a big decision."

"Why does it scare you?" he asks me stroking my cheek with the back of his fingers.

"I don't know. I don't know anything about adoption. I mean what do we do? What if the state won't let us adopt him? What if Lorna shows back up and wants to take him away? What if Tommy doesn't want us to adopt him? What if he can't love us?"

"That's a lot of 'what ifs'. But, I have more attorneys working for me than there are attorneys in Seattle and the resources to back them up. No one will take him away, once he's ours." He tilts my head up and gently presses his lips to mine. "I hate to see you cry, but I do love those soft, pouty lips crying makes." He pulls me to him and holds me tight. "Anastasia, I couldn't have hand picked a more incredible mother for my children. Besides we're all so fucking adorable there's no way in hell he won't fall in love with us."

I have to giggle. "There's that smile. I had to work awfully fucking hard to get it," he quickly kisses my lips. "but it was worth every second."

"So you want to have Tommy stay? You want to adopt him?" I ask.

He searches my face for a moment and audibly sighs, "Yes. Yes Ana, I want Tommy to be a part of our family. Do you?"

I give him a nod, "Yes. I do. But we need to talk to the kids at some point."

"I know, but let's wait a bit. No need to stir things up until we know more. And I don't want Tommy getting wind that his mother's gone until he's more settled here."

"That reminds me. I got upset and forgot about calling that case worker."

"Do you have the number?" Christian asks. I lean over and take it from the nightstand and hand it to him. "Thanks. Okay hand me the phone."

"Christian for a man who demands control, does it bother you that we can't seem to control when we have children?"

"Mrs. Grey, for a man who had complete control over every aspect of his life, I lost all of it the day I met you and I've never been able to get it back. And I wouldn't change a thing."


	82. Chapter 82

_**Fifty Shades…Full Circle**_

_**Chapter 82**_

"Tomorrow afternoon at three." Christian tells me as he ends the call and hands me the phone.

"What tomorrow?"

"The case worker that Collins woman will be out tomorrow at three to meet with us. And she wants to see Tommy while she's here." He lets me know.

"Oh. Did she say anything else?"

"Nothing that carried any weight. Just apologized for not getting out here sooner. I hate for people to apologize for not doing their job. You have a job. You do it or you don't do it. There are no apologies for not doing it. Just admit you fucked up and take the consequences. If she worked for me , she'd be looking for a new job tomorrow."

"Christian."

"What?"

"I don't care about that. What else did she say?"

"Just that she would be out to assess the situation and meet with Tommy and with us. She wants to see the house too. Make sure he's in an adequate home." He looks around the room. "I don't know. Seems adequate to me. What do you think?" he grins.

"You know the house is fine. I guess she wants to make sure we have running water and electricity and adequate shelter for him. I'm sure they have to do that."

"Doesn't she know who the fuck we are? We live in a damn seventeen million dollar home. Of course we have fucking running water and electricity. We even have food too."

"Christian. I'm sure it's her job. The state probably doesn't look at your money. Just what kind of home he is in."

"They sure look at it on April fifteenth every year." Christian gives me a quick kiss then slides off the bed taking his tie off and unbuttoning his shirt.

"Sweetheart, I'm sorry you had to leave work."

"Don't be." He gives me a smile. "I am going to change and go downstairs and work a while."

"Okay. I'll let Gail know Ms. Collins is coming tomorrow and everything needs to be perfect."

"Ana, it doesn't need to be perfect. We're fine." He looks over at me as he peels off his shirt and bares his chest. His pectoral muscles flex with every move.

"I know. I just don't want to take any chances." Drawn to him, I walk over and put my arms around his waist and press my cheek to his chest. "I love you, you know?"

He gives me a kiss on my head. "I know." Wrapping his arms around me. "Don't worry baby. We'll be fine."

"Okay. Get dressed. I'll see you downstairs." I turn to walk out. "Oh, Gail is doing steaks for dinner. Do you want to grill or do you want her to do it?"

"I'll do it. Just make sure she has one for Jack." He gives me a big grin as he pulls his T-shirt over his head.

"He's part of the family right? Of course she'll have one for him."

On my way to the patio I stop off in the kitchen to grab a bottle of water from the fridge.

"Better?" Gail asks as she prepares some fresh asparagus to steam.

"Yes. Thank you." I stop to talk for a moment. "I'm sorry. I just had a momentary melt down."

"Don't apologize Ana. I just want to make sure you are okay." She throws me a smile. "I was worried for a bit."

"I just hadn't seen the necklace since the accident. I think it was a shock. Just brought back a lot of memories."

"I'm sure it did. Is Mr. Grey home for the rest of the afternoon?"

"Yes. He is. He is going to work from home. Oh, he said he'd do the grilling and to make sure Jack has a steak."

"Got a little fillet coming to room temperature right along with the rest. Just like I always do."

"I'm going to sit on the patio and watch the kids while I read over this manuscript. I'll look out for them. And the case worker from the state is coming at three tomorrow to talk to us about Tommy. Just thought I'd give you a heads up with the kids and all."

"Okay. I'll make sure I let them out of their cages before she gets here." She laughs.

"Hey kiddos." I call as I walk out on the patio where they are playing. Jack is chasing Teddy and Tommy and Grace is not far behind. As I pull my feet up and open my water, I get ready for a couple of hours of reading, sunshine and a cool breeze. And hopefully some peace.

"Mama." Grace waves to me. The breeze is blowing her curls all over her head and they almost glow as the sun reflects off of them. Her little pink sundress is flowing in the breeze. Teddy pays no attention as he leads Jack around by a stick the canine has his teeth firmly impaled in. Tommy seems to have stopped to inspect something in the grass. In a few minutes I'm engrossed in the manuscript. Yea a good one. I love it when a story reaches out and yanks me in in the first few pages. If it does that to me it will to other readers as well. Still engrossed at twenty two pages, my concentration is broken when I hear Grace scream. Looking up I see her face first in the grass, so I toss the book aside and make my way over to her.

"What happened sweetie?" I coo as I pick her up and walk back to the patio with her. Sitting her on my lap I cradle her and try to wipe her tears. "Did you get hurt?" I look at her hands and knees as she sniffles.

"Uh huh," she nods and weeps. "I was wrunnun' and Jack twiped me and I fewl down." She holds her palm up to me. "Thee? I got a hurt pwace."

I give her hand a big kiss. I doesn't look near as bad as she seems to think it is, but I play along with it. "I'm sorry you fell down. I'm sure Jack didn't do it on purpose. He was just playing and didn't see you."

"Him didn't comed to see if I was okay." She pouts.

"Well, doggies, don't usually do that, but I'm sure he's sorry about it." I snuggle her and kiss her hair. "I think you'll be okay. You think so?"

"Uh huh. I fink so Mama. Can I thit wif you?"

"Of course you can. You can sit right here in my lap." I pick up my manuscript in one hand and continue to hold grace with the other until I see Tommy walking up toward us, his fist outstretched.

"Isth Gwace okay?" he asks.

"I think so. She fell, but I think she will be okay." I tell him. "Watcha' got?" I ask him.

"I bwung Gwace a pwesent 'cause her was cwyin'." Tommy opens his hand to reveal a slimy crawly earth worm.

"Ohhh. Where did you find that?" I recoil at the sight.

"I find it in da gwass ober dare." He tells us.

Grace lets out a blood curdling scream when she opens her eyes and spies the creepy crawly creature. "Nooooooo. Go 'way. Move." This only makes her cry harder as she tries to push him away. While I'm trying to thank Tommy for his gift and calm Grace, I hear Christian behind me, "What the fuck is going on out here?"

"Language please. I thought you were working."  
"I was trying to, but I thought someone was being beheaded out here. First crying, now screaming."

"Well they aren't. Grace fell down and Tommy brought her an earth worm to make it better."

Poor Tommy looks so dejected at the less than warm welcome of his present. "It's okay buddy." Christian walks over and picks him up. "Girls don't understand about worms. Can I see it?" he asks. Tommy opens his hand for Christian and Christian picks up the worm. "Hey, that's a great worm. Look how big it is and it wiggles a lot." Tommy almost has a smile on his little face. "Yes sir. That's one fine earth worm you got there, Sport."

He comes over and sits next to Grace and me on the outdoor sofa with Tommy in his lap. "Look Grace." Christian holds the wiggly creature out for her to see. "See it doesn't hurt. It just wiggles a lot. Wanna' hold it?" he asks her. "NO! Go way daddy." She violently shakes her head and buries her face in my chest.

"Well, Tommy, looks like girls just don't appreciate a good worm when they see it."

"Oh, I don't know. I've been known to appreciate a big old wiggly worm on occasion." I give Christian a sideways glance and a smirk.

"You know Tommy the worm has to be in the dirt to find something to eat and drink. He won't live very long if we keep him. What say we let him go?" Christian asks.

Tommy gives him a big nod. "Uh huh. We take him back to histh houth to get some dinner."

"Sounds like a plan." Christian stands up and he and Tommy walk back out in the yard to free the creature. After their good deed for the day is done, they begin to play with Jack and Teddy throwing the dog toy to each other and trying to keep Jack from getting it. As I play with Grace's hair, I can't help but admire my husband. He is in an old thread bare t-shirt and slightly ripped jeans with bare feet. He has a huge grin on his face out there running and playing with the boys. "Well. Grace. I fear we are out-numbered. Looks like four boys to two girls. "We girls are going to have to stick together."

"Okay mama. I sthick wif you." Grace agrees.

"Good. It's a deal, baby girl."

Christian finally comes dragging back up to the patio out of breath. He reaches down and takes Grace out of my lap giving her a big kiss and then sits next to me. "Come see Daddy, sweetheart." Christian murmurs to his daughter.

"Sthee my booboo?" she asks as she holds her palm up for him to see.

Christian looks at it and then presses his lips to her palm giving it a kiss. "I think it will be alright." He reassures her. "You wanna' go play with the boys?"

"No. I stick wif mama. We are gurls."

I have to smirk while I read my book. "What?" he asks.

"Me an mama we stick togever."

"I told her we were out-numbered two to four and we had to stick together."

"Ah. I see." Christian curls up on the sofa and leans against me getting comfortable.

"I thought you were working?" I ask him.

"It's so nice out this afternoon, I'll work later. It's nice spending time with you and the kids."

About that time Jack comes flying up the yard and takes a grand leap landing on the sofa. "Come here buddy." Christian cups his head and rubs behind his ears. Christian strokes is back a few times before Jack circles a time or two and snuggles in against Christian's leg. "That's a good boy."

"Well is everyone taking the afternoon off?" I ask as the sofa begins to fill up with Greys. Tommy gingerly walks over to Christian and tries to whisper to him. "Pway wainbows."

"What?" I ask.

"Pway wainbows." He insists.

"What is he talking about?" I ask Christian.

"I think he wants me to play the piano again." He looks down at Tommy. "Do you want to play Rainbow Connection again?"

"Uh huh. Wainbows."

"Okay. But how about if we wait until bedtime. Can we do it before you go to bed?"

"Ukay. Pway wainbows waiter. Pwomise?"

"Yes. I promise we will play Rainbows later."

I look over at Christian as Tommy returns to the yard, "He's just so cute."

"Yeah, I guess he is pretty cute. Knows good music when he hears it, too."

* * *

Kids are in bed, my bath is finished and I've slipped into my white satin gown. Turning out the bathroom light I look over at the empty bed. Christian must still be working. After turning down the bed I prop up on several pillows and pick my manuscript back up and read for a while. It doesn't take long for my eyelids to become heavy and I'm ready to turn in. Still no Christian, so I make my way downstairs and follow the light to his office. There he sits his face lit with the glow from the computer screen. I can see the figures on the monitor reflecting in his computer glasses. "What are you doing?" I ask as I walk in and around to his back. I put my arms around his shoulders and nuzzle my nose against his neck.

"I'm working….or I'm trying to work." He half grumbles.

"Oh, sorry. Do you want me to leave you alone and let you finish?" I ask as I loosen my embrace.

"No. Not really." He leans back in his chair and rubs his hands up my arms as he yawns. "What's left can wait until morning."

"Good. Come to bed with me." I whisper against his ear and let my palms skim his chest.

"Best offer I've had all day. Let me log out of this bitch and I'm on my way." A few mouse clicks and he's finished.

"You call it a bitch. I call it your mistress." I tease him.

"Well I guess as far as mistresses go, she's pretty demanding."

"Come with me and I'll show you demanding, Mr. Grey." I take his hand and lead him out of his office turning out the light as we go. Christian puts his arm around my waist letting his hand fall to my bottom which he squeezes and caresses most of the way upstairs.

"When are you going to New York?" I ask him.

"Depends."

"Oh? On what?"

"Well if you go with me I thought we'd leave Wednesday afternoon and come back Saturday. If I'm forced to go alone, I'll leave Thursday morning and be back late Friday night."

"You make it sound so dreary."

"If you don't go it will be. Just meetings and a boring reception Thursday night." He strips off his t-shirt revealing that incredible chest then begins to unzip his jeans and pull them off.

"You didn't mention the reception. What's that for?" I ask him as I lie across the bed watching the spectacle unfold before my eyes.

"For me. For everyone to have a little face time with a drink in their hand and a smile plastered on their face." He smirks a bit. "Come with me and save me from going through it alone?" Christian now in his birthday suit grabs his boxers from his drawer and steps into them.

"Christian. I just don't see how I can. I mean the kids, and Tommy is so new here I hate to go off and leave him."

"If he's going to live here, he'll need to get used to the fact that you and I are occasionally gone for a few days at the time."

"I know but…."

"But what?"

"Christian do you really think that we might be able to keep him?"

"I don't see why not." He walks around and lies beside me on the bed.

"But, I'm sure there are people who have been on a waiting list to adopt. What if they give him to someone else?"

"They wouldn't dare. Besides they always try to do what is in the best interest of the child. I don't think it would be in his best interest to drag him away from us and put him in another home." He softly plays with my hair as we talk. " He's used to us and we care about him. Besides Lorna signed that Power of Attorney giving us say so over decisions involving him."

"You were so smart getting her to do that. And we have that letter with her saying that she wants us to raise him."

"Yes, we do, but, you know it wasn't witnessed or anything. It's just a piece of paper."

"But it expressed her wishes."

"I know, but as far as a judge is concerned it could have been written by anyone."

"You're probably right."

I roll over to face him and prop on my elbow, "The kids loved hearing you play this evening. I wish you would play more."

"I don't like to. When I play, I play for me."

"But you play so beautifully. It's just so easy for you. I hate that."

"Why do you hate it?"

"Because it's so effortless for you. I could never do that."

"Yes you could. And it's not effortless. I t was hours and hours of practice."

"I know, but it just seems so natural for you. Some people have that and some don't. You do. I don't."

"Anastasia, you can do anything you want to do. Just make up your mind that you're going to do it." Christian's fingers slide through my hair until his hand is cupping the back of my head. Propping up on his elbow he slowly moves his head closer to mine. Stopping just millimeters from my mouth he momentarily searches my face before lightly brushing his lips across mine. Just that light contact sends electricity pulsing down every nerve in my body. Once again stopping he searches my face again before gently pressing his mouth to mine. His tongue glides across my lips asking for entrance which I willingly grant and open for him.

Moving back I lie back on the bed and my hands circle his neck bringing him with me. His weight on me is intoxicating. It pens me underneath him, helpless and unable to escape even if I wanted to. His maleness is excited and hard and wanting as it presses against me. Our wanting mouths are searching and needy for each other as they greedily make contact over and over again. His hand caresses the curves of my body as it finds its way beneath the satin and his fingers press into the flesh of my ass. "You feel so fucking good." He growls against my neck as his tongue traces the skin down my neck and over my collar bone until his lips press against the mounds of my breasts.

As I gasp, his mouth finds the erect pink bud that is straining against the satin of the gown. Grasping the thin strap of my gown with his teeth he pulls the satin away exposing my nipples to him. In an instant he takes one in his mouth, sucking and pulling.

"Oh, God," I moan as my body begins its surrender to him. The sounds that escape me only encourage him and his tongue undulates across the tender pink flesh as he sucks harder.

"God Christian, you're killing me." I groan as my body begins to tremble against him.

" You're so fucking hot, Anastasia." He growls against me as he moves up and takes my mouth again. "I want you."

As his hand skims over my flesh under the satin gown, it finds the warm wet folds between my thighs. "Oh fuck." I gasp as his fingers slide across the wet, needy flesh. As his fingers pass my threshold and enter, I pull my knees up and wrap his body in with my legs.

"You're so fucking wet, baby. Do you want me? Do you want me inside?"

"Yes," I gasp. "Yes baby I want you. I need you, please." As he props on his elbows I can feel his body move up and his abdomen press against mine as he probes my wet folds with his erection. I can feel it press against my opening as it begs entrance. Pulling my legs up farther I roll my hips and make contact as it pops in.

"Oh, fuck yes." He growls as he gently begins to advance. His hips roll forward and he moves farther inside.

"Oh, God that feels good." I whisper to him. My hips begin to move and meet his as he begins to slowly fill me. Then with one hard thrust he is all the way in. "Shit. Wait." I gasp. "Just a minute. Stop just a minute."

"Are you okay baby?" he whispers.

"Yes. Yes. I just needed a minute." I moan as I begin to roll my hips again. I can feel Christian's hard abdomen as it undulates against mine. Hard flesh against soft moving as one.

"Oh, my God I love fucking you." He growls as he buries his head in my neck.

I have to giggle, "You just love fucking Grey."

"Yes. I do love fucking, Mrs. Grey." His breathing is getting coarse. "Only you. Only you baby."

With every thrust my body is building. It is becoming his and I turn it over to him. I am his to do with as he pleases. With every thrust forward my mind clears of everything but him and me and where we come together. I can feel the excitement as it courses through me. My breathing is becoming unmetered and rough as I allow him to push me higher and closer.

"Oh God," he groans. "You're so damn hot and wet. I can feel you getting tight."

"Yes. " I gasp as I lean up and press my mouth against his. "Fuck me." I whisper against his mouth as my fingers press into the undulating muscles of his ass. With that he presses his palms into the mattress on either side of my head and begins to thrust hard and fast.

"Like that?" he gasps.

"Yes. Oh, God that feels…." I can feel every muscle between my thighs begin to beg for release as he pushes forward. "…that feels."

"Come on baby. Let it go. Come for me." he growls down at me.

"Yes. Don't stop. Fuck me." I growl up at him. My breasts are forced upward with every jolt as he wildly thrusts.

"That's right. Look at me, sweetheart. I want to see your eyes when you come."

My body can't contain it any more. With one last gasp I arch my back a dig my nails into his flesh, "Oh, fuck Christian." My mind goes blank as my body begins to release the building tension. I spasm around him and tremble against him as my orgasm rips through me.

"That's it beautiful. You're mine Anastasia." He growls as he continues to thrust forcing my body to its limit.

I am finally able to breath as the tension drains from my core and my mind begins to function again. "I love you, Christian. I love you." I whimper.

Christian buries his head in the crook of my neck as he begins to thrust wildly and fuck with mindless abandon. He has one goal and he is racing to it as he is breathing is becoming ragged and coarse. "Come on baby." I whisper in his ear.

In an instant I can see his skin begin to flush and his abdomen begin to quiver as he wrinkles his face and thrusts one more time and stills. "Oh, fucking shit." He growls with his last breath. The veins in his neck bulge as he trembles against me and jerks out his release. As his body begins to relax he gasps as he takes a breath. "Aww, shit." He collapses on me as he tries to catch his breath. Our chest heave against one another as we try to breathe and regain our senses.

"Fuck that was good, baby."

"I know." I strain for air. "I know."

As we rest still entwined, I can feel him begin to retreat from me. As he props up and searches my face below him he leans down and sweetly presses his lips to mine. "I love you , Anastasia Grey."

"I love you, Christian Grey." I return in a whisper. As he rolls his hips and pulls out I can feel the gush as my body releases the product of his orgasm. "Ewww." He crinkles his face and smiles. "Want a towel?"

"I'd love one. Thanks." Christian leaps up and heads for the bathroom. I can hear the tinkle in the commode and then the water running in the sink and soon after he returns tossing me a hand towel then crawls in beside me as I try to blot up the mess. "Here let me." He sits up and takes the towel from me and begins to gently wipe between my thighs. "We made a mess." He teases.

"Yes. But it was worth it." I smile back as he continues to wipe. "I think you got it."

I take the towel from him and hold it between my thighs. "My gown is drenched." I gasp still trying to catch my breath. Christian leans over and softly blows on my skin trying to dry it. His hand snakes around my waist and he leans over pressing his lips to my breast mounds gently showering kisses across my skin. I run my fingers through his sweaty hair as he continues to cover my breasts with kisses. His head finally comes to rest on my tummy as we surrender to exhaustion.

My eyes open to the light in the bedroom as I realize we have fallen asleep. Christian's head is still resting on my tummy and I try to move him away as I get off the bed and make my way to the bathroom. After freshening up and changing gowns, I return to my still sleeping husband and guide him to his side of the bed and pull the covers up over him. He looks so peaceful and happy and so damned beautiful. What did I do to deserve this man? This man that makes my life so complete.

As I slide into my side of the bed and pull up the covers, Christian moves over and drapes himself over me. I want to move him, but I can't bring myself to do it, so I wrap him in my arms and settle in, soon drifting off again.


	83. Chapter 83

_**Fifty Shades…Full Circle**_

_**Chapter 83**_

_**A/N: I don't usually do a lot of notes, but I just wanted to thank everyone who has stuck with this story. I posted the first chapter of More, a year ago on June first. I knew what I wanted to say, but had no idea it would be so long and involved. I want to thank all the readers and supporters and reviewers. It has been a great time and I thank you. So let's continue…**_

* * *

"I'm going to kill my husband." I growl at Gail.

"He'll be here. He wouldn't have forgotten about today," she tries to reassure me.

"I hope not." I can't help but stare out the front window searching for the black SUV and seeing nothing but driveway.

"Ana?" Gail yells from the family room. "The front gate just buzzed. They just let Ms. Collins through."

"Oh fuck." I curse to myself. Damn. This is too important for him to not be here.

I quickly leave the window as the white state staff car approaches the front of the house. Stopping by the mirror in the foyer to check my hair and makeup, I adjust my white sundress making sure my bra straps don't show, before hearing the doorbell. "I'll get it Gail." I holler as I take a deep breath before opening the door.

"Hi, Ms. Collins?"

"Yes. I'm Margaret Collins from the department of Child Protective Services. I'm here to meet with Mr. and Mrs. Grey."

"I'm Anastasia Grey." I extend my hand. "Please come in." I show her to the living room. We rarely use it, just for entertaining or when Christian plays the piano.

Ms. Margaret Collins appears to be in her mid to late forties, dishwater hair neatly pulled back into a low ponytail. Her minimal makeup lets her natural attractiveness show through. She is wearing khaki slacks and a colorful navy and yellow top with matching navy flats and bag. Her state ID badge is clipped to her shirt collar.

"You have a lovely home Mrs. Grey. Does someone stand out there all day just to open car doors?"

"What?" I look confused. "Oh." I have to smile. "No. We do have a security person that patrols the property. He was probably walking the front of the house when you arrived and helped you out. But no. We don't have someone just to open car doors. Please have a seat." I motion to the chairs opposite the sofa. "Can I get you something to drink? Coffee, tea, maybe a soft drink?"

"Tea would be lovely, thank you." She responds as she opens her brief case and begins to take out a folder with a stack of papers. "Will Mr. Grey be joining us?"

"Um, Yes. I don't know where he is. But he knows about the appointment. He doesn't miss appointments." I try to assure her.

"Well, I suppose we can get started and he can catch up when he gets here." She puts on her reading glasses as she looks over her papers. "Now this is what I have from the caseworker in California,…"

"Mrs. Grey I have Mr. Grey on the phone for you." Gail hands me the phone as she sets a tray of tea replete with accoutrement on the coffee table. "Thank you. Excuse me one moment please Ms. Collins."

"Is she there?" Christian asks.

"Yes. We're just starting some tea."

"I didn't forget. I got held up at the office and the traffic is a bitch. I'll be there in a couple of minutes."

"Okay. That's fine. Be careful. We just started talking."

"See you in a minute."

"That was my husband. He got held up at the office and traffic is bad, but he'll be here in a couple of minutes."

"I see. Traffic was pretty bad on the way out. Does Mr. Grey work late often?"

"No. Oh no. He's always very prompt. I'm sorry." I pause. "In fact he always insists on being here for dinner. Sometimes he'll work for a while after the kids go to bed, but he tries not to." I hope that sounded convincing.

"Mrs. Grey…"

"Oh, please call me Ana."

"Okay. Look Ana, I'm not here to try to find anything wrong. I'm just here to make sure that Tommy is in a good home and try to find out what your thoughts are about placement. There aren't any wrong answers."

"Placement? You mean you have to put him in another home?"

Just then I hear the front door open and Christian bursts in filling the room with his personality. "Hello. You must be Ms. Collins. I'm Christian Grey. I apologize for being late, but I was held up in traffic."

I can see Margaret Collins begin to salivate. How does he do that? She seems transfixed as she extends her hand . "It's a pleasure to meet you Mr. Grey."

"And you as well." Christian takes her hand and clasps it between both of his as he gives her 'the smile'.

"We were just about to have some tea. Do you want some?" I ask him.

"No. Thank you. I think I'll have coffee." When Gail walks in Christian places his order for a coffee. "Now where were you?" he asks.

"I was just about to go over Tommy's …um…uh…history. Can you tell me a bit about how he came to be with you?" She can't take her eyes off of him.

"Well, I was in Sacramento on business and I happened to see him alone on the sidewalk down town..."

"He was alone?"

"Yes. That's what brought him to my attention. He was so little to be alone. Anyway I was going to call the police…" I finish my story of how I found Tommy and how he came to stay with us.

"Well. I must say that Tommy and his mother are very lucky indeed. It's not often that a stranger offers a helping hand like that. It's just a shame that his mother wasn't able to take advantage of it."

"Yes. We were very disappointed. I was so hoping that she could get it together enough to be able to raise him." I tell her.

"So now he is in your home."

"Yes. In fact his mother signed a Power of Attorney giving us the ability to make decisions for him if she can't. A….And before she left she wrote out a letter asking us to raise him."

"I see. Well that brings me to the question. Are you considering fostering him? If not I'm prepared to take him today."

Christian speaks up, "No. No Ms. Collins. We don't want to be foster parents. We want Tommy to stay." He takes my hand and looks at me as he speaks. "We want Tommy to be our son. We want very much to adopt him."

She gives us a smile. "That's good to hear. How does he feel about that?"

"Well, we haven't talked to him about it." I explain." I mean he's only three. He still thinks his mother is coming back."

"That's right. We wanted him to feel a little more settled and get used to us before we rock the boat." Christian tells her. "And we wanted to find out if it is even possible to adopt him."

"Mr. Grey, I understand that you were adopted at a very young age."

"Yes. I was four. Just a little older than Tommy."

"And I understand that you came from a similar background, is that correct?'

"Yes. But what does that have to do with anything?" I can see Christian is getting wary.

"You aren't doing this as some sort of payback. I mean, you aren't doing this because you feel obligated in any way."

"Fuck..I mean No." I release the gasp I've been holding as he continues. "We have become very attached to Tommy. I mean all you have to do is meet him and he steals your heart. He's smart and loving. He deserves us and we deserve him. We care very much about him."

She smiles at him. " I understand. Well can I meet the rest of your family and Tommy?"

"Sure. They're in the family room." I tell her as we get up. "You aren't going to mention this to him are you? I mean he really has no idea his mother isn't coming back."

"Of course not, Ana. I just want to meet the other children and see your home."

As we walk into the family room all three are in the floor playing. Tommy has Jimmy and he and Grace are playing with Legos while Teddy is roughhousing with Jack. "Kids. This is Ms. Collins. She is a friend of ours and we wanted you to meet her." "That is Teddy. He is our oldest. And that's Jack our dog. We rescued him from the lake one day. And this is Grace, our daughter, she's just three and this of course is Tommy. You've met Gail."

"Well it's very nice to meet all of you. What are you doing?" She asks as she walks around and sits in the floor with the kids. Christian and I perch on the sofa with Gail and watch as she interacts with the kids. After a few minutes she gets up and thanks them for letting her play. "Let's do a walk through the house, just to say we did and then go talk."

As we get to Tommy's room I flip on the light for her. "Goodness. I thought you said this was a guest room. There is Spiderman everywhere."

"Yes. I found out Tommy likes Spiderman." I explain. "I felt bad that the other kids have so much and I wanted him to have a room of his own. At least while he's here. It started out with a Spiderman comforter and sheets and just sort of grew."

"Well any little boy would be happy to sleep in here. In fact the entire house is just beautiful."

After we return to the living room and take our seats. "Well, he is precious. I can see why he stole your heart."

"So what do you think our chances are?" I ask her.

"Chances?"

"Yes. About adopting him. Do you think we might be able to keep him?"

"Mrs. Grey, finding adoptive homes for older children is next to impossible. Most everyone wants an infant, or they go to a foreign country to find a child. There are just so many here that need homes." She pauses. "The decision is not up to me, I'm here to assess the home situation and make recommendations. I suggest if you are serious, that you get an attorney and start the process. There are a lot of forms to complete and hearings before a judge. It has to be determined that he has been abandoned, then an ad has to be posted for 3 weeks looking for his mother or father, although I see on his birth certificate that there is no father listed. Then there has to be a motion to terminate parental rights then the wait. For children under three termination can take place at six months, but since he is over three it is usually a year. The judge can overrule that if he deems it is in the best interest of the child and the situation meets the criteria set forth. But I suggest you find an attorney that specializes in this to help you through it. I will have to make a couple of visits to the home and one unannounced visit prior to the proceedings to complete a pre-placement report."

"When will that be? My husband and I are going out of town for a few days this week."

"Oh? When?" she asks.

"We're actually leaving tomorrow and will be back Saturday." I look over at Christian and squeeze his hand.

"Yes. My wife is accompanying me on a business trip." He smiles.

"Do you go out of town often?"

"Not really, but occasionally. Our housekeeper Gail, you met her in the family room, was with us before our children were born. She adores them and cares for them during the day or when we are gone."

"I see. And what do you do Mrs. Grey? I'm sure I have it here, but just in case."

"I'm an editor at South Atlantic Publishing. A book editor."

"And Mr. Grey? Your occupation?"

Christian looks at her like she has two heads. "I'm an entrepreneur. I own my own company. I buy and operate businesses of various types."

"Well. I think I've seen enough for today."

"So can Tommy stay with us or do you have to take him?" I can feel the tears welling in my eyes.

"Oh, no. Tommy is fine where he is and since you already have a POA for him. I can't see taking him out of the home. He seems very happy here," she gives me a smile as I almost break down.

"Mrs. Grey. Adoption is not as daunting as you may think. All anyone wants is for Tommy to find a good home where he is wanted and will be cared for and loved. My recommendation is for him to remain here until permanent placement can be determined. I'll get the background checks started and I suggest that you find that attorney and start the ball rolling."

"Would it be possible for me to see his birth certificate?" I ask.

"Well, I don't see why not." She digs it out of her papers and hands it to us.

"October 12." I have to smile as I fold it and hand it back to her. "Tommy said he needed a birthday. I want to make sure he gets one."

"I think this may work out for everyone." She smiles as she takes the certificate and returns it to her file, before she stands up to leave.

Christian puts his arm around me as we walk her to the door. "Tommy is one very lucky little boy." She smiles before she shakes our hands to leave. "I'll be in touch and probably be seeing you in a few weeks. You have my card , don't hesitate to call me if you have any questions or just need to talk about it. Have a safe trip and we'll talk next week."

"Thank you so much, Ms. Collins. Have a safe trip back to town." I wave as she gets in her car and pulls down the drive.

Turning into him I throw my arms around Christian. "Oh Christian , maybe we will get to keep him."

"Well I don't see why not. I mean look at us, we're perfect. Why wouldn't they give him to us?" he smiles down at me as we close the door and walk back to the living room to sit down and finish our drinks.

"So are we going on a trip?" he asks.

"Yes. I thought about it and decided we need to have some time together. Besides I can't turn you lose in New York in a tux by yourself. It wouldn't be fair to all the women up there."

"Well, I call Stephen and let him know we'll be leaving tomorrow afternoon."

"I haven't packed. I need to get that done."

"Okay. Have Gail call Rosa and let her know we're coming tomorrow."

"Okay. What do I need to pack for?"

"Well we have the reception, and then I'd like to go to dinner one evening and a play? Anything in particular you want to see? I'll have Andrea arrange for tickets."

"Anything is fine. It'll just be nice to get away. Christian I can't believe we might get to keep Tommy."

"I told you it would work out."

"It's not a done deal yet. Don't jinx it."

"We'll make it work. I'll call Dad and get his recommendation for an attorney." Christian sips the remains of his coffee as he loosens his tie and unbuttons his collar.

"I thought you were going to use your massive legal team for that?" I teasingly ask him.

"I was, but I think that way Mom and Dad will feel some involvement. They'll appreciate that we included them. Besides they have been through the process a few times."

"That's a good idea. You think they'll be excited?" I ask him.

"I think they'll be thrilled. At least Mom will be. Should we talk to the kids?"

"I'm still hesitant until we're farther along." I tell him. "Maybe we can sort of feel them out about it. You know sort of prepare them without coming right out with it."

"Mom and Dad might have some advice on that too." He pauses momentarily, "Ana…I don't know how to bring this up. I know you're busy right now, but I was wondering. Would you mind if I call Virginia and invite her to come visit? I thought we might stop by Chicago and pick her up on our way back from New York."

"Wow. That was unexpected." I reach over and take his hand. "I think that's a great idea. I'll let Gail and Myra know to have the guest wing made up for her. And we can think of a way to explain her to the kids."

"Why do we have to make anything up? Why not just tell them?"

"Just tell them?"

"Yes. Tell them who she is and where I came from." He says with all sincerity.

"Okay. Teddy will understand. Grace may not be quite ready to understand it all, but why not?"

"If we are going to adopt Tommy, then the kids need to understand what adoption is and what better way to tell them? It's about time they knew that pretty much everyone in the Grey family is here because Grace and Carrick Grey cared enough to adopt and raise and love three orphaned children."

I slide over and crawl in his lap. Searching his face I softly press my lips to his for a moment. "You are simply the most amazing person I have ever met in my life, Christian Grey."

"And?" he looks so serious.

"And?" I think for a moment. "And I love you. Will that do?"

"Yes. I love you will do nicely, Mrs. Grey." He smiles and gives me a hug.

I think I'll call Virginia and see if she wants us to pick her up. Wanna' help?

"Sure. I haven't talked to her in ages."

"Me either actually. I've been so busy that I've been remiss in staying in contact. Let's go give her a call. Christian and I stop by his office and I close the door behind me as he puts his desk phone on speaker and dials."

After we get past the housekeeper that answers the phone we hear Virginia, "Christian? Is that you?"

"Yes, Virginia, I have Ana here with me."

"Hello Virginia. How are you?" I throw toward the phone.

"I'm fine dear. How are the two of you? And the children?"

"Well actually, that's why we're calling. Ana and I have to be in New York on business later this week. We'll be flying home Saturday and we'd like to stop in Chicago and pick you up. Can you come visit for a week or so?"

"Yes, Virginia. We'd love to have you and have you meet the children. Please say yes."

"Well, I don't have anything on my calendar other than a couple of luncheons and I can reschedule those. Of course I'd love to visit. What time will you be here?"

"I'm not sure. We are going to New York on Wednesday and be returning on Saturday. I'm sure we can be there any time that's convenient for you." Christian reassures her.

"Would you have time to come out to the house?"

"Sure. I'm know Ana would love to see the house."

"Yes. I'd like to see it, Virginia."

"Okay, why don't we say around noon. I'll have some lunch prepared and we can eat before we leave."

"It sounds great. I'll call you and let you know what time we'll be arriving."

"Good. I'll send the car for you to bring you out to the house. Oh, Christian. Do the children know…..I mean do they know who I am?"

"No. They don't. But I hope that they will by the time you get here. We can discuss it on the plane."

"That sounds wonderful. I'm so looking forward to it Christian, and Ana thank you for having me. We can catch up on Sunday dear."

"Sounds good Virginia. Talk to you Sunday."

" Goodby Christian, Ana."

"Goodbye Grandmother."

We hear dead silence for a moment, "Yes. Dear."

Christian turns the phone off. "I've never heard you refer to her as grandmother before."

"I've never called her grandmother before. It's about time, don't you think?"

"Yes, I suppose." I walk around the desk and put my arms around him. "You need to talk to your parents and let them know she'll be her. I'm sure they will want to meet each other."

"You're right." He smiles at me. "Time to get all this shit out in the open. No more secrets. No more denying it doesn't exist."

"I want Tommy to know about Lorna. I don't want him growing up and not knowing who he is or where he came from." I tell him as I lean against him. "I want his past to be a part of him and his future to be a part of us."

Christian runs his hand through my hair, "Will this grow?"

"If I don't cut it again it will. Why?" I have to give him a sly grin.

"Just asking. It's your hair."


	84. Chapter 84

_**Fifty Shades…Full Circle**_

_**Chapter 84**_

"Teddy, Grace, Tommy can you guys come over here, please? Mom and Dad need to talk to you for a few minutes." Christian calls the kids a we sit down on the sofa in the family room.

After Christian and I sit the kids come over and I pull Grace in my lap and Christian collects Tommy with Teddy standing between us. "Hop up here between us, son." Christian instructs Teddy and he quickly complies. Jack is sprawled on his back asleep in the chair, everything pointing toward the ceiling.

"What is it Dad?" Teddy asks.

"Well your Mom and I are going to have to go out of town for a few days, starting tomorrow."

"Okay, but Gail will be here, right?"

"Yes, son, Gail will take care of you while we're gone."

"So?" he shrugs. "You and Mom take trips all the time."

"Well not ALL the time. But we do go away together from time to time. This will be a business trip. We are leaving tomorrow afternoon and will be back on Saturday."

"Okay" he shrugs and starts to get up.

"Not so fast." Christian grabs his arm. "I'm not finished. On our way back we are stopping in Chicago and will be bringing someone back with us for a visit."

"Who?" Teddy asks.

"Yeah, daddy who you be bwinging for a bisit?" Grace repeats.

"Well, she is an older lady and….actually she is a member of our family that you haven't met yet."

"Okay. Who is she?" Teddy asks again.

"Well she is my grandmother, Teddy."

"But I already met Grama Carla and Grama Grace and Grama Tre- bel- e- an." He tries to pronounce Trevelyan with a lot of difficulty.

" Tra-Vel-y-an." Christian pronounces it for him. " I know. But she is MY grandmother and her name is Virginia Douglas . She is my mother's mother."

"She's Grama Grace's mother or Grama Carla's mother?"

"Actually neither. You see Teddy, I wanted to wait until you kids were older to tell you this, but I think now might be a good time. Actually I was adopted by Grandma Grace and Grandpa Carrick."

"What's dopted?" Grace asks.

"That's when your parents get kilt and then someone else decides to be your parents." Teddy tries to explain.

"Well sort of, but not exactly." Christian corrects him. "You see, when I was a little boy, actually about the age of Tommy and Grace, my mother died. Nobody knew where my father was, so I was put up for adoption. That's when Grandma Grace and Grandpa Carrick adopted me."

"But where did Grama 'Ginia come from?" Teddy asks.

"Well, when my mother died she lived in another city and no one knew about Grandma Virginia. Since they didn't know who she was or how to find her, I was adopted."

"But what about your Dad? Why didn't he come to get you?" Teddy asks.

"I didn't have a dad around. In fact I didn't even find out about him until a few months ago. Actually my dad died about the time my mom did."

"So how did 'Ginia find you?"

"Well, some policeman found out about me several years later and told her…"

"Why didn't she come get you and take you home?"

"By that time I had lived with Grandma Grace and Grandpa Carrick for several years and they loved me and they were the only parents that I knew, so Grandma Virginia thought it was best for me to stay with them."

"So why did she come meet you now?" Teddy asks.

"Because, I got older and she thought that I would be able to understand it better since I was grown up. She loved me and wanted to know me and now she wants to get to know all of you."

"Okay."

"That's it? Do you have any questions?" Christian asks.

"I'll try to think of some." Teddy tells him.

I have to stifle a giggle and Christian gives him a snort, "Okay son. If you think of any, I want you to come ask me."

"Grace? Do you have any questions?" I ask her.

"Does Gama 'Ginia have a little girl?"

"Actually she did. Her little girl was Daddy's mommy. Her name was Ella."

"But Gama Gwace is you mommy."

"I know it's hard to understand, but Grama Ella was his mommy first, then when she died Grama Grace became his mommy." I try to explain to her.

"Who's Gama Ella?"

"Grama Ella was Grama Virginia's little girl and daddy's mommy until she died." I think for a moment. "Maybe we should call Granma Virginia, Great Granma Virginia. Would that help?"

"I fink so." Grace nods like she totally understands now. "Why did she die?"

"Well, …" I look at Christian for help.

"She took some drugs she wasn't supposed to take and it killed her." Christian honestly tells them.

"That's why we're not supposed to take drugs." Teddy reinforces.

"Tommy. Do you have any questions?" Christian asks him.

"Aw you cummin' back?" he almost looks scared to death as he asks.

Christian looks at him like he doesn't understand the question. "Oh, from the trip? Yes. Yes of course, we will come back. Ana and I will be gone for couple of days, and Gail will take care of you. But I promise we will come back."

"But what if Mama comes afore you get back?"

"I think we will be back before your mother comes back." Christian tells him. "Don't worry. You will be safe and sound here with Gail and we will see you in a few days. I promise."

"It's okay Tommy. Gail always stays with us when Mom and Dad have to be gone. She gives us ice cream before bed."

"She does?" I ask and try to pretend to be surprised.

"Uh huh, and I get two kinds." Grace adds with an ear to ear grin as she holds up two fingers.

"Two?" I sound aghast.

"Uh huh. Chokit and banilla." She grins up at me.

"Oh no. Surely not?" I tease as I smooch on her neck and she giggles.

* * *

"Well that was thoroughly confusing." I tell Christian as I stand in my bra and panties looking through my closet to decide what to pack.

"Yeah. Once I got into it, it just kept getting worse and worse. But as they get older it will get easier to understand." He pulls his T-shirt off and tosses it in the dirty clothes bin. "At least now it's out in the open. They can ask questions if they have any."

"I hope so. By the time we were finished I was almost confused." I giggle a bit.

"It's funny. All Tommy wanted to know was were we coming back." Christian mentions as he steps out of his jeans.

"I know. Poor little thing. I guess when someone in his life leaves they don't always come back."

"Case in point, his mother."

"What do you think about the black Lanvin for the reception?" I holler from the closet.

"What Sweetie?"

"To wear to the reception. It's black tie. I was thinking about taking the black dress you bought me."

"Yeah. Sure. It looked great on you."

"I guess we need to make sure we always come home." I mention as I walk out of the closet with the black couture cocktail dress and lay it on the bed.

"What?" he asks.

"Tommy thinking we might not come back. We need to make sure we always make it back home."

"Yes. That's why we have security, Mrs. Grey. To ensure we make it back home." He reminds me with a smirk. "That's why it's important to allow them to do their job and not try to evade them." He walks over and puts his arms around me as I try to lay out my clothes for the trip.

"I know. I'm doing my best. I really am." I give him a quick kiss. "Aren't you going to pack?"

"No."

"Why not?"

"Because I keep clothes at the New York place so I don't have to pack."

"But we haven't been there in ages. How do you know you can still wear them?"

"Ana, I haven't gained a pound in years. I know they'll fit. Rosa will send my tux out and have it cleaned and ready to wear. Everything else is already there."

"Oh. Well I don't have any current gowns there. I need to pack those and shoes and purses and jewelry."

"Why don't you just keep things there to wear?"

"I do have things like make up, personal items, undies and night gowns and casual things there, but I don't keep eveningwear. It would go out of style before I could wear it unless we went up there more often."

"So? If it goes out of style just ditch it and have new stuff delivered. Rosa will maintain your closet." He tells me. "Just have Caroline send some things out every few months and Rosa can keep the closet current for you."

"Christian. That's so wasteful. I'd rather just pack and take what I need."

"Suit yourself." He gives me a shrug. " When you get finished, I'll be in the tub."

* * *

"Yes, late this afternoon. But, I'll have my laptop and my phone with me. You can reach me at any time. "

"Okay, Ana. That sounds fine. I'll get all those changes done and the finished draft back to you by Monday."

"Thanks Connie, please don't hesitate to call. I'll be down in a couple of weeks and we can go over everything."

"Do you want me to make hotel reservations for you?"

"Yes, but I'm not sure exactly what day I'll be arriving. I'll let you know for sure when I know more."

"Okay, Ana. Safe trip and have fun."

"Thanks, Connie. Don't know what I'd do without you."

"Oh, before you go, do you want me to set up something with Joshua Holland?" she asks.

"No. I'll give him a call and do it. I need to talk to him after I get that draft next week."

"Okay, Ana. Take care."

"I will. Thanks Connie."

Okay that's done. Clothes are packed. Grace and Carrick know we'll be at the New York place and that we'll be bringing Virginia back with us. Grace is planning a dinner so everyone can meet her. Grace is also over the moon about Tommy. I think she knew from the start that Tommy wasn't going anywhere. Carrick has really been a big help putting us in touch with an attorney that specializes in adoption proceedings. We haven't heard a peep from Lorna. I hope she's okay. I feel so awful for her. I just hope wherever she is she's safe and can find some help.

"Mama?"

"Yes sweetie?" I look around to see Grace wandering in our room.

"When you and daddy be cummin' home?"

"We are will be home Saturday I think." I stop what I'm doing and sit on the bed pulling her up in my lap. "You going to be a good girl for Gail?" I ask nuzzling her little neck.

"Uh huh."

"Can you keep Tommy company? This is all new for him and he might be a little scared until we get back."

"Ukay, I take carw of him."

"Do you like Tommy, baby?"

"Uh huh. He pways wif me."

"Would you like him to stay with us?" I ask her.

She gives me a little shrug. "Be alwite wif me. But he caint habe my toys."

"No sweetie. We'll get him his own toys." I give her a big hug. "But I just wanted to know if it would bother you if he came to live with us."

"He aweady libin' wif us."

"Yes. But I mean forever. If Tommy lived here forever and he was your brother."

"Teddy is my bwruther." She looks up at me so serious. "But I can habe two."

"Okay. I just wanted to check in and see how you felt. You know that would mean that he would be a part of our family and Mommy and Daddy would be his mommy and daddy and Jack would be part his dog. You would share everything with him just like you do Teddy."

"He can't habe my toys." She shakes her curls at me in all seriousness.

I have to laugh and pull her in for a hug. "No Sweetie, you don't have to worry about your toys. We'll make sure Tommy has his own toys to play with." I can't help but kiss her head and look at her in amazement. My daughter. I had no idea I could love anyone so much. "Did you know I love you?" I whisper to her.

"Uh huh. I know."

Setting her back on the floor I need to get things finished up and ready to go. "Okay, sweetie. Go back down with Gail and the boys and let mommy finish packing." I'm meeting Christian at Boeing for some reason. We usually fly out of Sea- Tac, but…

"Hello Sweetheart. What's up?" I answer my phone.

"Nothing just making sure you're ready. Look instead of meeting you at the plane, I'm coming home first. I need to drop Taylor off and pick up Sawyer to go with us. I want Taylor there with Gail and the kids."

"Oh, okay. Yes. I just checked in with Connie and have everything nailed down at work. I'm packed and almost dressed."

"I'd tell you to stay almost dressed, but we need to get in the air. Besides it's a long flight to New York. We'll need something to do to pass the time." I can hear the smile in his voice.

"I know. Sex over the heartland."

"I like bicoastal fucking."

"No you just like fucking anywhere, anytime and any way you can get it, mister." I have to smile.

"Okay. You got me."

"Yes I do. And I intend to keep you."

"Okay. We can talk dirty over the square states. I gotta' go. I'll see you in about an hour, babe."

"Okay. I love you and be careful."

"Me too."

After a second check around, I finally get my suitcase closed. Don't know why I do that. When we get there, if I have forgotten anything all I have to do is send out for it. Stepping into my beige slacks I zip them up and pull an oversized, off the shoulder black cotton sweater over my head. I want to be comfortable for the long flight. After blow drying my hair out straight, I put in some dangle gold earrings and finish my make-up. Then head downstairs.

"Hey everybody." I announce as I walk in the family room.

"Can I get you something while you wait on Mr. Grey?" Gail asks.

"No thanks." I flop on the sofa to watch the kids play. "I'm sure we'll have lunch on the plane. Thanks anyway."

"Gail, I don't know why I'm asking, but you know how to get in touch with us, right?"

"I could do it in my sleep. I talked to Rosa and she has everything ready for you. I told her to have some Bollinger chilling and Mr. Grey's stomach has been bothering him so I had her get supplies for something light on cream sauces and not too spicy. She has his evening clothes ready and the apartment is opened up and ready for you."

"Really? His stomach is bothering him?" I ask astonished that she knows this. "He hasn't mentioned it."

"He hasn't really mentioned it." she explains. I just noticed that the antacid bottle is getting empty faster and he's been laying off the spicy stuff lately. Drinking more milk too."

"You don't miss a trick do you?"

"I just notice his habits. That's all." She gives me a smile as she waits with me on the sofa. "Anything special we need to do with Tommy while you're gone?"

"I don't think so. I guess just make sure he knows we'll be back. He seems to be a little insecure about that."

"Okay. I have the guest wing made up for Mrs. Douglas' arrival. I'll have some fresh flowers for her room delivered Saturday morning before you arrive."

"Great. I know you'll make sure everything's perfect." I notice Jack springs off of 'his' chair and flies to the door yapping his head off. "Christian must be home. Jack is always the first to know." His yaps turn to excited whines and cries and I hear the front door open. "Yep his master is home."

"What's everybody doing in here on this sunny day?' Christian asks as he carries Jack trying to calm him and having no luck.

"Waiting on you," I look up and he bends down to give me a kiss. "Hi sweetheart."

"Daddy!" Grace gets up and runs to Christian grabbing his leg and Teddy leaves his television to join her. Christian sits on the sofa next to me and pets Jack as he talks to Grace and Teddy. "Jack! Calm down buddy. Goodness, you get so worked up. Cool it." Christian sets the canine on the floor and kisses Grace and gives Teddy a little swat on his butt and he hugs him. "Tommy? Come see me buddy." Tommy looks a little wary but he gets off the floor and walks over to Christian to get a hug and a kiss. "Teddy I need for you to watch over things while we're gone. Can you do that for me?"

"Yes sir, but nobody listens to me." He tries to explain.

"I know. Taylor will be here with Gail and they'll take care of things, but I need you to keep an eye out and let Gail know if Tommy or Grace needs anything, okay?" Teddy gives his dad a nod.

"Are you ready to go?" Christian asks.

"Yep all packed. Just waiting on you." I look over to see Taylor with my bags and a small dopp kit for Christian. He takes them out the front door to load them in the SUV for Sawyer. Christian and I make our way to the front door with the kids and a dog in close pursuit.

"Gail call if you need us." I remind her." And you and Taylor make yourselves at home."

I kiss Teddy and Grace and Tommy. Christian does the same only he picks Tommy up and whispers something in his ear and then gives him a kiss on his cheek before setting him back on the floor.

"Okay guys be good. Mom and I will be back before you know it." And with that we exit the door and slide into the waiting SUV pulling down the drive through the gate and onto the road.

"Goodness. It takes an act of congress to get away with all the kids and dogs. Remember when we used to just hit the door and leave?" I ask him.

"That was before Master Grey came along. Then it was diapers, bottles, play mats, toys extra clothes. Who knew a creature that small needed all that shit." He shakes his head as he checks his email on his phone.

"You gonna' look at that all weekend?" I ask.

"Some of it. This is a business trip." He reminds me. "But I promise it won't keep me from you."

"I hope not. I rearranged my schedule to give us some time alone." I remind him.

"Don't worry." He reaches over and gives me a kiss. "You'll have my full attention Mrs. Grey."

"Christian?"

"Yeah, babe?"

"Has your stomach been bothering you lately?"

"A bit. Why?" He looks over at me.

"Nothing. Just wondering." I tell him. "Anything I can do?"

"Nope. It's just stress. Lot going on."

"Okay. Don't get too stressed."

"I won't." He gives me a grin. "I know just how to distress."

"Why are we going to Boeing instead of Sea-Tac?" I ask him.

"The lease on the Sea-Tac hanger was expiring and I wanted one at Boeing. Sea-Tac is more for commercial flights and Boeing is mostly private craft. Less traffic this way. Boeing is closer as well. "

"Oh. Okay. Just wondering."

"I figured with the new plane coming, we'd just make the move."

"Okay. You know about all that stuff. I don't." I look back and watch the landscape rush by as we head to the airport.

We pull in the entrance from I5 and take the access road to a huge business hanger with GEH emblazoned on the side in shades of gray from white to black. "Goodness it's huge, Christian."

"Yeah. Remember the new plane is bigger than the last one." He looks out the window admiring his new acquisition.

Suddenly my breath is taken away as we round the side of the hanger and the huge gray and white behemoth comes into view. "Christian!" I gasp. "Is that it?"

"Yep. She was delivered yesterday. That's why I was running late."

"Oh my God. It's huge. I don't remember it being that big."

"That's her. Isn't she great? Baby wait until you see the inside."

Taylor pulls up to the hanger and we walk through the building and lounge finally exiting the door to the steps leading up to the plane. Christian lets me go up the stairs first.

"Welcome aboard Mrs. Grey." Stephen greets me with a huge grin.

"Hello Stephen. Thank you."

"Robert, Ma'am." Robert gives me a nod.

"Hi Robert. Did you come with the plane?" I ask recognizing him as the pilot that worked for the broker. "Yes, Ma'am. Good career move."

Christian nods to them as he follows behind me.

"Mrs. Grey. Mr. Grey. Welcome aboard." Isla greets both of us.

"Can I look around?" I ask Christian.

"Let's get in the air. Then I'll give you the tour."

Christian and I take a seat in cushy white leather seats and get ready to depart as Sawyer joins Isla in the area for the crew to prepare for takeoff.

"Christian. This is more beautiful than the drawings."

"I know. It really turned out well. I'm happy with it."

"Happy with it. I guess you are. It's like an apartment in the clouds." I pause. "An expensive one."

"As we wait in line to takeoff. I reach over and run my hand through his hair resting my palm on his cheek."

"What?" he asks.

"Have you been getting your scans like you're supposed to?"

"Of course." He smiles. "The bullet has encapsulated and hasn't moved a millimeter. Ana what's wrong?"

"I didn't notice that your stomach was bothering you. I haven't asked about your scans lately. I'm not taking care of you like I should." I search his gray eyes that are locked with mine. "I've been so busy with my job and Tommy. I haven't paid enough attention to you. I'm going to change that. …..and I'm starting today with this trip. You're my priority Christian and I intend to make you feel that way." Leaning in I brush my lips across his and then press them against his mouth as his tongue begs entrance…..


	85. Chapter 85

_**Fifty Shades…Full Circle**_

_**Chapter 85**_

Cupping his head in my hand I press harder allowing his tongue to meet mine and they dance a familiar dance as our lips slide over each other.

"Take off." Christian gasps as he breaks his kiss.

"What?"

"Wait until takeoff. After the wheels are up we can head aft."

"Okay." I whisper to him. "What's aft?"

"Back to the rear. That's where accommodations are." He cups my face and murmurs against my mouth.

"You mean the bedroom?"

"Fucking straight. And I hope we get this bitch in the air sooner rather than later." He growls as he kisses me and then forces himself to stop. "Wait here I need to tell Isla something." Christian walks forward and talks to Isla for a moment before returning to his seat beside me. "We're next in line." He grumbles as he loosens his tie and unbuttons his collar.

I hear his phone ring and he yanks it from his pocket. After looking at it he answers. "Grey." "I'm in a plane getting ready to take off and I don't have time to talk." "Just recheck your figures and email them to me. I'll be at the Vanderberg offices in the morning we can conference then. Set it for nine a.m." "And make sure Kerr is there too. I want his take on the situation." "Right." He ends the call and places the phone back in his pocket.

Gently sliding my hand in his pocket I extract his phone, then looking down at it I turn it off and slide it back in his pocket. "What do you think you're doing?" he asks with a bewildered look on his face.

"I'm turning your phone off. I told you, I'm going to start taking better care of you. You are always making sure I'm happy and safe and cared for. You have the patience of Job with the kids. You have gone so far out on a limb for me with Lorna and Tommy. On top of it all you run an enormous conglomerate. You never take off. Even when you do you are always there for anyone who needs you." I sigh and look at him. "You have too much on you. To top things off you have that bullet sitting on your spine and those anxiety attacks. Now your stomach."

"Sweetheart. I do what I love doing. I love to work. You of all people should know that. It actually relaxes me. And as for the kids, they're my children and I love them. I want to spend time with them. And making you happy is what I live for. I'm a very happy healthy man. You don't have to worry."

"I'm not worried. I'm just saying that I need to start paying more attention. I need to help take care of us. Without us there is nothing else."

"I think we're fine. And as soon as this fucking piece of shit gets off the ground, I intend to show you just how fine we are." He gives me a soft gentle kiss.

I have to break out in a grin. He always has the same answer for everything. Fucking. I guess I'm lucky that fucking isn't the answer to business issues or he'd fuck himself to death. I feel the gentle lurch forward as we advance our place in line for take- off. Then the slow turn as we take position and the engines begin to rev as the beast begs to be released from its restraint. I love this part. I love the feeling of all the power beneath me as Stephen finally releases all the pent up energy and we begin to hurl forward down the runway. The tarmac rushes past and the wind begins to lift us; my stomach floats as the wheels leave the ground. As the ground falls away we bank right and begin to climb until the clouds begin to obscure the ground below.

"How 'bout that?" Christian asks.

"Yes. How about that?" I smile over at him. "I'm glad this plane makes you happy."

He shrugs, "It's just a new toy." Searching my face, "You're what makes me happy. Thank you for coming with me, Anastasia."

"I'm glad you asked me. We haven't really been away since our anniversary last year."

"I know. We need it. In fact I still want to go back to the Cote d'Azur at some point."

"Ahhh." I give out a sigh. "That sounds good. Just you and me and a lot of sun and time on our hands. Speaking of our anniversary. How is my Heathman doing?"

"What do you mean?'

"I mean is it doing well? Are we still in business?"

"Ana I have no idea. I don't keep up with the Heathman. I suppose it' doing fine."

"Why don't you keep up with it?"

"I don't keep up with individual properties like that. I have bigger thinks to keep my eye on."

"Well who does?"

"I hire people who hire people to hire management companies who hire account managers to keep up with them." He squeezes my hand. "I don't have time to keep up with individual properties. Would you like for me to find out for you?"

"Yes. I guess. I just want to make sure we always have it. I have affection for it."

"Me too. I'll check on it Monday for you."

"Okay. I love my Heathman."

We've leveled off and unbuckled our seatbelts and Isla brings us a tray with champagne and fresh strawberries. "Mmm. This looks good. I'm starving." I grab one of the berries and take a bite then wash it down with the bubbly.

"Do you want lunch now or ….later?" Christian asks as he sips his wine.

"I guess the strawberries will do for now. We can eat later." I lean in and press my lips to his for a soft kiss.

"Ready?" he murmurs to me and I give him a nod and a smile.

Christian stands and taking my hand he helps me out of my seat. We grab our glasses and walk through the fuselage. "Christian, I just can't get over how well it turned out. It's just beautiful." I can't help but admire all of the dark woods and white and linen fabrics against the muted green walls. We pass a large dining table made from dark wood that doubles as a conference table when needed; it is surrounded by charcoal leather chairs. Then into a lounge with a beige banquette sofa and matching opposing chairs, accented by muted green and burnt orange throw pillows and walnut coffee and occasional tables. And a sixty inch flat screen for TV and movies. It is attached to a wall that separates the front of the cabin from the sleeping quarters.

"Christian this is just amazing. I had no idea it would be this spectacular. It's like a house. And I know you designed all of it."

"I worked with the designer and you helped pick the color scheme." He gives my waist a squeeze as we walk past the small sleeping quarters on either side of the cabin and the full bath. Finally reaching the back Christian opens the walnut door that opens the master bedroom. He stops me from entering and scoops me up carrying me over the threshold to the bedroom. It's as beautiful as the rest of the plane. The queen size bed is facing the opposite direction and is banked against a walnut and glass wall. It is covered by an oversized linen comforter and muted green and orange throw pillows. There is a white leather sofa with a muted green throw and throw pillows. And a walnut desk with Christian's laptop on it. A muted green upholstered sitting bench flanks the foot of the bed. The nightstands are of dark walnut and match the trim in the room. Christian sets me on my feet and tilts my head up until his lips can press to mine. I can feel his heart racing as his chest presses against mine. His kiss breaks and he glides his hands over my shoulders and down my arms. After setting his glass on the night stand he takes my glass and places it beside his.

I grab the collar of his suit jacket and peel it over his shoulders and down his arms finally tossing it on the sofa. Taking his tie in my hand I pull him closer to me as his hands snake around my waist. I can feel the electricity between us. It's always there. It's always pulling me to him like a moth to a flame. I need him. Standing on my toes I pull his mouth to mine and they seal together, searching, exploring, needing.

"The first time we made love as a married couple was on our plane. I think we should christen this one as well."

Smiling up at him I nod in agreement as I remove his tie and begin to slowly unbutton his shirt. My lips trail over his firm chest and follow my fingers as the buttons open.

"Oh God," he gasps as his fingers comb through my hair and cup my head. As I reach his belt Christian stops me and pulls me up once again finding my mouth. His lips trail across my cheek and his teeth nip at my jaw as his breath falls against my neck. In an instant he has my sweater over my head and lying on the floor. His lips are pressing kisses over the mounds above my pink demi bra. His index finger slips inside the cup of my bra and pulls it down allowing my nipple to escape the satin restraint. Cupping my breast with his hand his mouth finds the erect pink flesh. Sucking and pulling with his mouth I begin to feel the flutters between my thighs as my arousal begins to soak my panties. "Oh, Baby. Oh, Christian. " I gasp as my head falls back and my hands cup his head. "Ow!" I squeal as he nips me with his teeth and then grins up at me.

His fingers find my zipper, "I think we need to get rid of these." He says as he deftly unzips it, allowing my slacks to pool at my feet. As I step out of them he pulls me up and I wrap my legs around his hips. "That's a girl." Our mouths find each other again as he lays me back on the bed. "Oh Anastasia, I need you."

"I need you to." I growl up at him. He releases me and stands over me beside the bed. Quickly he unbuckles his belt and unzips his trousers. Never breaking our gaze he removes his boxers, socks and shoes then reaches down and slides my panties down my legs tossing them aside. "Hurry. I need you, baby." I gasp up at him. In a moment he has crawled on the bed and hovers over me. "Come here." I growl as I wrap my legs around him pulling him to me. His hands cup my head as he kisses me deep and wet and hard as though he needed my love to take a breath or make his heart take another beat. "Love me Anastasia. That's all I ask. Just love me, baby." He breaths and his words fall against my mouth.

"I love you Christian. Only you." I gasp against him. "Make love to me. Please. Make love to me baby."

His fingers softly glide over my curves and down my body finally resting in the folds between my thighs. "You're wet. So wet. So ready for me." He whispers as his erection presses into me.

"Yes. Ready for you. Needing you inside. I need to feel you in side." I plead. With that I can feel his hips roll and his manhood strokes over my wet needy flesh. "Oh, fuck," I gasp as it hits my wanting aching nerve endings. "Baby. I need you." My hands dig into the flesh of his buttocks and guide him forward as the head of his erection probes my wet entrance. One more roll of his hips and I feel the gentle pop as he passes over the threshold and begins to enter me.  
"Oh fuck, yeah." Christian gasps as he gently sinks into me. "Oh fuck baby." He growls as he rests and we both relish the sensation of him buried deep in me . Cupping his face I pull his head from my neck and guide his mouth to mine. "Kiss me," I breathe. "Kiss me Christian." His mouth finds mine again and his tongue explores my mouth as our lips slide across each other. My insides gently contract as he tenderly pulls out of me then just as gently glides back in. His hips circle as they roll allowing him to stroke the nerve center just inside me.

"Fuck. You feel so good." He grumbles. "I've imagined us here, fucking, ever since I bought this thing." He never breaks his stride as he talks. My hips roll to meet his and I keep him captured in my legs with my arms around him.

Smiling up at him I glide my hands down his back and squeeze his butt cheeks pushing him farther in to me. In one quick move he pulls out and quickly slams back in. "Ahhggg," he grunts. "Like that?" He growls.

"Yes. I like that." I breathe and fist his hair in my fingers. Christian braces up on his palms and rolls his hips again withdrawing then forcefully entering again. My hips are meeting his every move.

"Ahh, yesss. Yes baby." I growl up at him. Propping on my elbows I lift my face to his and take his mouth with mine. As I do he begins to drive forward; his thrusts becoming hard and fast. "Lie back baby," he commands and I obey. His chest presses against mine and his chest hair prickles against my breasts. His forearms cage my arms as his hips and abdomen undulate against me as he pushes us both toward our orgasm. Every stroke he makes rubs me inside and caresses the nerve endings outside as well. "Oh, shit. You're going to make…Oh fuck I'm gonna' come Christian."

"Come on baby. Come for me." He continues to circle his hips and push into me with abandon. His heart is pounding and his breathing ragged as he pushes and drives me to my release. Every stroke is magic; every thrust drives me senseless. I can feel my walls beginning to tighten around him. I can feel myself on the edge of surrender. A couple of long swift strokes of his manhood against my flesh and I can feel myself begging for surrender.

I gasp and tighten as my body begins to convulse around him. My flesh grabbing and releasing around him. "Oh, God, O God, Oh God. Shit." I growl against his neck.

"Damn you're beautiful when you come, baby." He whispers searching my face as my orgasm rips through my body like rushing water from a burst damn. "That's it. Keep coming." He coos against my cheek as my body begins to release me. He continues to thrust; forcing every spasm my body has to give him. He stills as I open my eyes and stare into his. His fingers brush my hair out of my eyes. "Are you okay?" he whispers

I nod and grin, "Absolutely," I gasp trying to catch my breath. "Don't stop."

Christian slowly begins to thrust again. Pulling his legs underneath him he props on his shins and grabs my hips in his hands. He pulls me to him as he thrusts hard and fast. Leaning forward he props on his hands and continues to thrust and push and drive. Perspiration trails from his neck and falls over my breasts and my hands reach up and glide over his chest.

"Come on baby. Come for me." I whisper up to him. He gives me a faint half smile just before gasping, "I love you" and falling on me. His belly trembles and his breathing stops as he clings to me and shudders. "Oh, Fuck, baby." He growls as he begins to catch his breath. I begin to feel his full weight as he relaxes on top of me.

"Damn Anastasia. Damn." he exhales. In a moment he lifts up and looks down at me. "Thank you."

"For what?" I smile up at him and comb my fingers through his perspiration soaked hair.

"For being here. For loving me. For being mine."

"I had no choice." I gasp back. "There was nothing else for me but to love you. Besides I like the way you fuck. You're pretty good you know?"

He snorts, "You had nothing else to compare it to, but I like the way you think."

"Oh I hear women talk."

"Yeah? Well as long as we keep practicing that's all that counts," he smiles and gasps.

"You're growing again." I smile up at him as I feel him begin to fill me again.

"I know. You do that to me," he smiles. "I can't get enough of you." He begins to slowly inch his way in and out again. "I'll never get enough of you baby." With that he takes me in his arms and makes sweet, passionate love to me until we lie exhausted on the linen comforter.

Christian gets up in all his naked glory and walks to the mini -fridge and pulls out a tray of sandwiches and fruit and cheese. He returns and sits cross legged on the bed across from me.

"Mmmm. I'm starving. What are they?" I ask as I grab for one of the sandwiches.

"I don't know. I'm just hungry." He grins over at me as he chews the food. "Want some cottage cheese with the fruit?"

"Sure." I tell him as I down what's left of my champagne. "More champagne too."

He again returns with a container of cottage cheese and two forks as well as a cold bottle of champagne which he proceeds to uncork. "You don't mind if I don't dress for lunch do you?"

"No if you don't mind eating with a naked lady." I tell him.

"Actually, I rather like it." he gives me a grin.

"Christian? When we got on the plane I noticed two smaller jets at the hanger. They had GEH on them. Are they yours?" I ask as I down the fruit and cottage cheese.

"Yep."

"When did you get those?" I ask.

"Umm. Actually I bought them the same time I bought this one."

"We have three jets?" I ask sounding astonished.

"Yes. Is there a problem?" he asks.

"No. I guess not. It's just you didn't tell me."

"Well, I want this one for private use. This will be mine and for the family and long overseas business trips." He takes a bite of cottage cheese. "And the other two are smaller for short business trips for the executives. Or day trips for me."

"Oh. So we are a three jet family now?"

"Technically they are for business use, but since it's a family business, I guess we are a three jet family."

"Hmmm. Okay." I shove my glass toward him. "More champagne please."


	86. Chapter 86

_**Fifty Shades…Full Circle**_

_**Chapter 86**_

Lying on my tummy with my head resting on my folded arms Christian gently presses his lips to my bare bottom. "It's almost four. We'd better get dressed. We should be at Teterboro in a few minutes." He says as he trails his index finger over my skin.

"This has been incredible. I'm so glad I changed my mind and tagged along with you."

Christian reaches up and cups my head, "So am I," he whispers against my mouth before kissing me. "Now let's get a quick shower and get dressed so we can land."

Christian and I jump into the granite and glass shower and wash away the afternoon sex. After drying off we quickly jump back into our clothing and make our way back to our seats. Isla walks back to us, "We'll be coming into Teterboro in about fifteen minutes. Can I get you anything before we start our approach?"

"I could use a water, please." I tell her.

"Same here." Christian almost barks as he pulls his phone from his pocket. I notice Isla has a new uniform. I guess it goes with the new plane. A beige linen pencil skirt hitting just above her knee and a muted green silk blouse with a tiny orange GEH logo embroidered on the collar. She has a vest that matches the skirt and nude pumps. God I'd hate to wear those all day long. Her blond hair is neatly pulled back in a chignon at the back of her head. She almost blends in with the décor.

"Fuck!" Christian growls as he manipulates his phone.

"What is it sweetheart?"

"Three texts from Ros, one from legal and four from finance. And I missed them because _SOMEONE_ turned my phone off." He rolls his eyes over at me.

I smile and shrug, "Well would you rather have talked to Ros or fucked me?" I murmur under my breath and slip my arm through his.

"Well it's close but I…"

I reach over and squeeze his arm before he can finish his sentence. "Careful how you answer that. The rest of your week depends on it."

"I suppose I could have talked to you and fucked Ros, but then that would have been totally unproductive." He snorts and grins. "Oh, I'll call them when we land. Hopefully nothing will fall apart in 5 hours."

"If it does, you need to hire some new people."

Isla brings us our bottled water and a glass. "Bottle's fine for me." I tell her.

Before long we hear Stephen announce our approach to Teterboro and that it is seven nineteen pm East Coast time.

"Gosh I forgot about the time difference." I moan. "It'll almost be bed time by the time we get to the apartment.

"Not really. We have the helicopter waiting for us and the apartment is only ten minutes away. I'm sure Rosa will have dinner waiting. We can eat then have the rest of the evening to relax." He gives me a smile." Tomorrow, you can sleep in while I go to the office. Or have someone in to do your hair and nails or get a massage. Just whatever you want to do."

"I want to talk to the kids."

"Ana we've been gone five hours. I'm sure they're fine. Gail would have called if something were wrong."

"I know. I just want to hear their voices. I can't help it. I'll call after we get to the apartment and catch them before they go to bed." Christian leans over and kisses my forehead, "My little mother hen. I had no idea you were so maternal when I met you."

"Neither did I. Would it have changed your mind?"

"Not in the least." He grumbles as he answers messages on his phone. "Now get buckled in so we can get on the ground."

After landing we taxi to the hanger where Randall is waiting with GEH helicopter that Christian keeps in New York. Sawyer quickly gets our luggage off the plane and loaded into the waiting helicopter as we thank Stephen and Isla. Christian makes sure they have their accommodations for the stay in New York before we disembark and slide into the craft that will take us to the fifth avenue apartment. "You aren't flying?" I ask Christian as he buckles himself in next to me.

"Nope. Short trip. I'll let Randall take this one." He smiles over and squeezes my hand. In short order the propellers begin to whirl and I hear Randall's voice over the headset. "Welcome back to New York, Mrs. Grey. Mr. Grey good to see you again."

"Thanks Randall. How have you been?" I ask.

"Just fine Mrs. Grey. And you?"

"Fine."

"Good to hear. I'll have you to the apartment in about twelve minutes. Ma'am."

"Thank you, Randall." Christian answers for me as we lift off the ground and head for Manhattan. The sun is low in the horizon but it's still daylight and the scenery is spectacular as we fly over. Christian is staring out his window deep in thought, his index finger stroking his lower lip as he looks at the city below us. Within a few minutes we have the building in sight and the helipad coming into view.

"Coming into Midtown Mr. Grey. I've advised the penthouse of your ETA and everything is ready for your arrival."

"Thank you Randall." Christian barks over his headset.

"Pleasure, Mr. Grey. Enjoy your stay." He responds as he gently sets the helicopter down on the helipad above our building. No sooner have we touched down than Carl is there opening the door and helping me exit the craft. Christian comes around to help me navigate to the elevator and Carl assists Sawyer with the luggage. Sawyer will stay in the servant quarters of the penthouse with Rosa and Carl.

Rosa is a sweet, short, round, lovely Hispanic woman in her mid- forties. She and Carl have been married for twenty something years. Though trained as security, Carl mostly functions as chauffer and butler for the New York place. He is quite attractive and towers over Rosa. Best of all he adores her. They have a grown son who lives in New York and is trying to be an actor. Christian hired them years ago when he first bought the place. They live on the premises year round and keep it up. Not a bad deal, living in the penthouse of one of New York's most prestigious properties. The only caveat is having to put up with Christian Grey several times a year and of course the occasional girl shopping trip when Kate and Mia talk me into getting away for girl time in the big city.

We enter the mirrored elevator and Sawyer and Carl enter after us pushing the button and entering the code for the apartment. As usual Christian thinks an elevator ride is an invitation to cop a feel of his wife's ass. I have to roll my eyes and give him a grin as he does. A short trip and the doors open into the foyer of the apartment which contains a round table that sits in the center on the polished marble floor. A large arrangement of fresh flowers rests on it. Behind that is the double staircase that leads to the second story where the guest rooms and servants wing are.

"Mr. Grey. Mrs. Grey. It's so nice to see you back." Rosa gives us a huge smile. "Can I get you anything?"

"Not now. Can you get Mrs. Grey's things unpacked please?" Christian asks her as he heads to his office.

"Of course. Dinner is almost ready and the wine is chilling in the cooler." She lets us know as she disappears into our bedroom to get me unpacked. I kick off my shoes and run my toes over the Persian rug that lies over the gleaming hardwood. This apartment is so different from the way we live in Seattle. In Seattle everything is clean and sleek and contemporary with neutral colors. Everything is light and airy. Escala is so contemporary it almost hurts your eyes. The house is definitely comfortable and lived in, but still we like the clean lines.

This place is definitely different. It is full of color and fabric and overstuffed everything. The furniture is heavy and dark and ornate. There are yards and yards of silk and tassels adorning the floor to ceiling windows. The dark hardwood floors are covered with antique silk Persian rugs. The entire place oozes opulence. I don't understand why Christian decorated it this way. It's so unlike him. Most of all, I don't know how Rosa keeps it dusted.

After looking out at the city I go to try to find Christian. He is in his office, laptop on, his tie loosened and his collar unbuttoned. His office walls are Mahogany with book shelves and a heavy mahogany desk accompanied by an overstuffed red leather chair. As tall and muscular as he is he is almost dwarfed by the furniture. The paintings are dark with ornate gold frames and look more like they belong in a museum rather than our house.

Stopping in the doorway I stare at him taking in the site of the most beautiful man I've ever seen. "What are you doing?" I ask with a little trepidation.

"Catching up on what I missed this afternoon." He gives me a half smile. "I seem to have gotten distracted."

"Will you be much longer? I was going to open some wine."

"Go ahead. I'll just be a few more minutes."

"Okay. I expect to see you by the time I get it poured." With that I leave and head for the kitchen. Rosa is busy tending to dinner when I get to the huge professional grade kitchen.

"Mmm smells good Rosa." I reach into the cooler and grab a chilled bottle of something it really doesn't matter what. "How have you been?"

"Oh we've been good Mrs. Grey. Just the same. Always the same." She says as she goes about her work. "How are the little ones? I haven't seen them in so long they must be grown by now."

"No. Not grown, but they're fine. Teddy looks more like Mr. Grey every day and Grace acts more like him every day." I finally get the cork extracted from the bottle. "Then there's Tommy. He's my scared little mouse."

"Tommy? Who is Tommy?" she stops working and asks.

"Oh. I'm sorry. He is a child that we are taking care of and hope to adopt. He will be four in October and he has blond hair and green eyes. He's just the sweetest thing ever."

"Where did you get him?"

"Would you believe I found him on the street?" I almost laugh.

"No! Really?" She looks at me in disbelief. "You find him on the street?"

"Yep. When I went to Sacramento on business, he was sitting on the sidewalk alone outside my hotel." I take a sip of wine and tell her the shortened version of the story.

"Well, I need to meet this Tommy. When you bring the children again?"

"I don't know Rosa. It's not easy traveling with three small children. But soon maybe." I take another sip. "I need to go find Mr. Grey. He said he wouldn't work too much."

"Will you tell him dinner in fifteen minutes, please? Tell him to change into something comfortable to eat. I made lemon chicken ravioli with asparagus and truffles."

"Okay. I'll go drag him out of that office." I walk through the cavernous apartment and turn on a few lamps as the sun is setting. It's just beautiful lighting up the skyline in hues of orange and purple with the lights of the city just beginning to twinkle in the distance. Walking over to the terraced doors I open them and walk out to feel the city air. Rosa has planted flowers everywhere. They are mingled with the palms and potted trees in large sitting planters and hanging from window boxes and wall planters. Their fragrance is intoxicating and they brighten up the cold gray stone of the building. Leaning over the terrace I look down at the street below. It seems like miles down to the sidewalk. "Ah shit!" I snap as Christian walks up behind me and wraps his arms around my waist.

His nose buries itself in my hair and his lips press against my neck. "Did I scare you?"

"Yes. You scared me. I thought you were in your office."

"I got finished and was on my way to the kitchen when I saw you out here."

"Rosa said to get changed. Dinner will be in about ten minutes."

He grabs my glass and takes a huge drink of my wine. "Mmm. Good. Okay. I'll go get out of this suit. Come with me?"

"Sure." Christian puts his arm around my waist and we walk to the huge bedroom. He pulls his tie from his collar as we walk and begins to unbutton his shirt. When we get to the bedroom, I pull my feet up into an overstuffed wingback that is upholstered in a chintz print with elegant birds and palms and fringe sewn into the seams.

"You just gonna' watch me?" he asks as he reaches in his drawer for a T-shirt and pulls it on over his chiseled chest.

"Yep. I like to look at ya'." I smile at him. He unzips his trousers and slides out of them then peels off his boxers. His hand reaches down and adjusts the now free equipment.

"Why do men do that?" I ask.

"What?"

"That. They always have to mess with the equipment every chance they get."

He gives me a big grin as he pulls his jeans up and zips them. "Haven't you heard? It feels good. I'm hoping you'll touch 'em later on."

"I think that's a possibility."

"Let's go eat." He holds his hand out for me and we walk back to the dining room. Rosa has set the table with the silver flatware engraved with CTG and the Baccarat crystal and Wedgewood. The dining table is so shiny it looks like polished granite instead of cherry and it's so long that I sit next to Christian, who is at the head of the table, instead of at the other end. White tapers are in the silver candelabras and fresh flowers are arranged in a low Baccarat bowl.

After we finish our salad, Rosa brings in our plates setting them in front of us then opens a fresh bottle of Pouilly Fume and pours it.

"Thank you Rosa. It looks wonderful." I compliment her.

"Can I get you anything else?"

"No we're fine thank you." I tell her. "You and Carl and Sawyer go eat."

"Okay. You ring the bell if you need anything. I'll just be in the kitchen." She turns to leave. "And don't eat too much I have fresh cannoli for desert." I had forgotten about the bell. At home Gail is always right there. In this place the kitchen is separate and through the butler's pantry. It would be impolite to yell for her.

"Cheese?" Christian asks and I give him a nod. He masterfully grates fresh parmesan over my pasta and I hand him the fresh warm baguette and butter.

"Mmm. This is so good." I moan as I slide the pasta in my mouth.

"Yes. Rosa is quite a cook. As good as Gail I'd venture."

"We should come here more. It's nice to get away."

"I know. It's not like I haven't suggested it."

"I guess I just feel like the kids can't do without us."

"But they can. I trust them completely with Gail and Taylor."

"Christian I've always wondered, why is this place so different from the other places?"

"What do you mean?"

"I mean the way it's decorated. It's just so posh and opulent. I feel like I'm in a palace."

He shrugs, "It's just the way I wanted it to be in New York. Especially for entertaining. In fact I originally bought this place specifically for entertaining. The style reflects the city, like the Aspen place is rustic and the Maui house reflects the tropics." He takes a huge bite of bread. "And the Seattle place is contemporary Mattel. You have to step over tricycles, Leggos, Barbie dolls and Jack."

"You're right about that. It's definitely geared toward the children."

"Sweetheart, if you don't like it, redecorate it," he tells me.

"Oh heavens, there must be hundreds of thousands of dollars in the décor. I wouldn't do that."

He shrugs, "Well it's yours. If you want to change it I won't object."

"No it's lovely. It's just very, very…. upper crust." I put my finger under my nose and lift it.

"Well we are very, very upper crust, Mrs. Grey."

"Yeah, me with kid dirt under my nails."

He grabs my hand and kisses my fingers. "I love your kid dirt."

"I want to catch the kids before Gail puts them to bed." I get up and run to my purse and get my phone. I dial home as I return to the table. "Hey. It's me Gail. How are things going?"

"Oh, just fine. It's been what, six seven hours since you left?" Gail teases.

"I know. I just wanted to catch the kids before bedtime."

"Well, they're eating dinner with Jason and me. Hold on and I'll put them on." I quickly put the phone on speaker and lay it on the table so Christian can hear.

"Mom? Dad?" I hear Teddy's little voice.

"Hey Baby. What are you doing?" I ask.

"Eatin' a hamburger. What are you doin'?"

"Dad and I are eating too."

"Hey Buddy. What's up?" Christian asks him.

"Nufin'. Just eatin'. Where are you?"

"We're in New York, Sweetie." I tell him as I take a sip of wine.

"Oh. When are you comin' home?"

"Saturday. We'll be home Saturday evening."

"Are you taking care of things?" Christian asks him.

"Yep. Wait. Jack wants to say hi." We can hear rustling and grumbling in the back ground. "Teddy no. Don't let him lick the phone." We can hear Gail say.

"He tried to eat the phone." Teddy reports. "Wait Teddy. Let me wipe it off before you put it to your mouth."

"I'm going to wipe the phone off, Ana." We hear Gail say before the grating noise comes across the speaker. Christian grins and shakes his head at the commotion on the other end. "Okay. Grace, say 'hi' to Mommy and Daddy." Gail prompts her.

"Momma? Bwing me a pwesant fwom nee York." That's Grace.

"I'll try baby. I'm not sure I'm going shopping, but I'll try."

"Hi sweetheart. How's my girl?" Christian asks.

"I good Daddy. I mith you Daddy." She tells Christian.

He melts, "I miss you too baby, but we'll be home before you know it. Are you taking care of Tommy?"

"No."

"No? Why not?" he asks her.

"Gaygay take care ob us. Not me."

Christian chuckles, "Okay. Let us say 'hi' to Tommy."

"Say 'hi' sweetie." We can hear Gail in the back ground.

"Hi." We hear this faint little voice.

"Hi sweetie. It's Ana and Christian. How are you?" I ask him.

"I awrite. Aw you cummin' home?" he asks us.

"Yes, buddy. We're coming home in three days." Christian tells him. "Get Gail to show you the days on the calendar."

"Can you wait three days?" I ask him.

"Uh huh."

"Okay . We love all of you and miss you." Christian tells them. "Gail?"

"Yes, Mr. Grey?"

"Can you show Tommy the calendar and mark off the days every day until we get back?"

"Yes, sir. I'll put it on the refrigerator so he can see it."

"Okay thank you. Everything alright there?"

"Yes, sir. Everything is fine."

"Okay. Call if you need us."

"Bye Mama Daddy. I wuv you." I hear grace in the background.

"Bye everyone. I love you." I get my last word in before we hang up.

I let out a sigh, "Don't you sort of miss all the chaos?"

Christian nods as he continues to eat, "A bit, maybe. But I like the peace and quiet and being alone with my wife. I like having you one hundred percent to myself for a change."

"Mmm. I can't eat another bite." I groan and sit back in my chair.

"No cannoli? Rosa will be crushed." Christian gives me a half smile.

"We'll save it for later. Maybe a late night treat."

After we finish Christian and I retreat to the living room and the overstuffed down sofa. There is a mirror image sitting directly across from us. Christian puts Chris Botti on the sound system. Cinema Paradiso is one of our favorites. We take the wine and snuggle looking out the giant wall of glass at the twinkling skyline. Christian nuzzles my hair, "Listen to all the quiet." He whispers in my ear just before he kisses my neck.

"Mmmm. " I give him a smile. "I know. Isn't it lovely?" We sit entwined drinking wine and listening to the music until I'm almost asleep in his arms.

"I have an idea," he murmurs to me. "Why don't you go start a bath."

"All by myself?" I pout at him.

"I have a quick call to make and I'll be there shortly. Go get nice and clean."

"Who in the world do you call at this hour?" I grumble up at him, mad that I have to leave my warm cocoon.

"Tokyo." He whispers. "Thirteen hours ahead. It's mid- morning there." He moves me from his arms as he stands up and walks toward his office. I finally move and go to the bathroom and turn on the water in the marble tub adding a sweet scent of Jasmine for bubbles. After the tub is filled I sink into the bubbles and sip my wine until my glass is dry. It feels so incredible. The apartment is dark and the bath is lit by a single crystal chandelier filling the room with soft light. The sound of Christ Botti floats through the rooms and soothes me to the point of needing to fall asleep; in fact I drift off for a bit waking to a lukewarm tub and still no husband.

I need to go find him. Dragging myself out of the tub I dry off and slip into a white satin gown, my hair still loosely pinned up. I can see the dim light emanating from Christian's office and I follow it. When I arrive I see him pacing through his office his headset on as he talks to someone on the other end. He looks so intense, so focused and so in control. He knows exactly what he is doing. He will always amaze me with his ability to manage so much at his age. He's still such a young man to have accomplished so much. And this man loves me completely. He is mine and I adore every square inch of him.

I watch quietly and listen to him not wanting to break his concentration. "Yes. I agree. I think we can get this worked out, Hisao. I'll be looking forward to meeting with you. And please give my regards to your wife. Anata ni kansha shi, tsuitachi no kaitekina nokori o motte iru. Sore wa yorokobi, Hisaote kimashita. Sayōnara."

I'm taken aback. Since when does he speak Japanese? Christian notices me in the doorway as he hangs up and gives me a smile. "Sorry. It took a bit longer than I thought." He tells me as he turns off his desk lamp and walks to me. "How was your bath?"

"Lonely."

"I'm sorry. I'm all yours now." He tells me as he snakes his arm around my waist and we head back to the bedroom.

"Christian? When did you learn to speak Japanese?"

He snorts, "I don't speak Japanese."

"Well what was that? I heard you talk to him in Japanese."

"Oh. I know a few pleasantries. Just enough to be polite. Not enough to carry on a conversation."

"What did you say to him?"

"I said, Anata ni kansha shi, tsuitachi no…."

"No." I scold him. "In English. What did you tell him?"

"I said, thank you and have a pleasant rest of the day. It has been a pleasure. Goodbye."

"Oh. Do you know pleasantries in any other languages?" I tease him.

"Well, I'm fluent in French…."

"I know that. I mean anything else."

"I try to learn a bit of the language for people in every country I deal with. I know a bit of Chinese, Spanish, Italian, Russian… let's see," he thinks, "Norwegian, German, Arabic and I think that's it."

"Goodness I never knew that."

"Well I don't often have need to tell you to have a nice day in Arabic." He crooks his arm around my neck and kisses my forehead as we walk.

As we get to the bedroom he starts to strip out of his jeans. Being commando under them he's naked in a flash.

"I'm afraid I let the water out. It got cold." I let him know.

"No problem. I'll just jump in the shower and get the day off of me." He gives me a wink as he heads to the bathroom. "Meet you in the bed?"

"I'll be there."

As he jumps in the marble and granite shower I decide to alter our plans. I quickly strip off my gown and slide into a red satin thong. I reach into my jewelry case and pull out the platinum and pearl collar that he bought for me. Quickly pulling the pins from my hair I braid it tying it with a band to secure it at the bottom. The water stops in the bathroom so I quickly run through the bedroom turning off all the lights. The room is dimly lit; the only light coming from the soft light of the crystal chandelier overhead.

"I'll be there in a minute , Babe. Let me run a brush over my teeth." He hollers out to me.

"Okay. I'm waiting." I swiftly kneel next to the heavy, ornate, four poster, canopy bed and sit on my heels. After placing the collar on the floor in front of me, I rest my palms on my thighs and cast my gaze to the floor. And I wait...


	87. Chapter 87

_**Fifty Shades…Full Circle**_

_**Chapter 87**_

Christian pulls the red silk tie tight, binding my hands together securing them behind my back. Finishing the knot, his arms reach around me and his palms glide over my skin; one across my abdomen and the other skimming over a breast and up until his fingers come to rest at my throat. He buries his nose in my neck as he pulls me hard against him setting my skin on fire by the warmth of his breath as he takes my earlobe in his teeth and bites down.

"Ah." I let out a startled gasp as his teeth bear down on the little pillow of flesh.

"Shhh," he responds against my ear, his fingers pressing against my neck. His other palm flattens against my abdomen kneading my flesh then slowly sinks between my skin and the red satin. The shear anticipation is causing my body to quiver against him as his fingers glide between my thighs, but neglect to sink into the wet flesh. "Not yet." He teases. "Not yet."

My breathing is ragged and my legs tremble as his hand massages and caresses between my thighs. Without warning his finger finds the wetness and slips across the slick flesh sinking inside me. I want to gasp as electricity courses through me. My fingers search for his erection and grasp the moist towel he is wearing pulling it free and letting it fall to the floor. Now I feel the warm, hard member press into my back.

"Did I tell you to do that?" he growls.

My body responds by relaxing into his and I feel the quick sting of his palm against my right butt cheek. The sudden sound of flesh on flesh fills the bedroom.

"Answer me. Did I tell you that you, could do that?"

"No," I gasp. "No sir. You didn't."

"I guess I need to show you who you belong to." Christian releases me and unties my hands. "Pick that up." He nods to the collar still on the floor.  
"Yes sir." I quickly respond by bending down and seizing the neckpiece. "Sir." I hand it to him my eyes still averting his gaze.

Christian opens the delicate collar and places it around my neck, then I hear the click as he secures it. His hands cup my head as he forces my face close to his. "You. Are. Mine," he growls against my mouth before taking it with his hard and fast. "Never forget that."

"Yes Sir."

"You belong to me Anastasia," he snarls.

The metal of the collar is cold against my skin but quickly warms. Just the feel of it on my neck makes me want to surrender to him; give him everything. I need him. I crave him; mind, body and soul I crave him like a drug.

" Turn around." I quickly obey. "Hands." He barks and I surrender them to him, allowing him to re-tie them behind me. As he finishes securing them I melt at the warmth of his hands as they knead and massage my ass cheeks in his hands. Those masterful hands that can manipulate me as well as they manipulate a song from his piano. His hands move around and cup my breasts caressing and kneading until his fingers take my nipples and twist.

"Ah." I barely gasp at the gentle pain. He slowly turns me around to face him and his hands gently stroke through my hair as he leans in to take my mouth. But his lips glide past mine as his mouth finds my neck and he moves farther to roughly take a nipple in his mouth. It's almost more than I can bear. The sucking and pulling. The warm wetness from his mouth. The feel of his tongue as it undulates across my flesh causes a few spasms to ripple through me from between my thighs. My head falls back forcing my breast farther into his needy mouth. His breathing is ragged and course and soft moans escape him as he devours me. I want to talk to him. I want to tell him how excruciatingly wonderful that feels. But he hasn't given me permission to speak.

"Come with me," he murmurs as he stands erect and walks toward the bed. Taking my arm he leads me to the waiting four poster. As he sits on the edge of the bed he moves me to stand between his muscular thighs. He smells incredible; just out of the shower clean mixed with his own scent. God if I could find a way to bottle it and carry it with me. "Look at me, Anastasia." He murmurs in a deep soft voice. I comply and my eyes lock with his steel gray. As I do I unconsciously bite my bottom lip causing his lips to slightly curl at the corners.  
"You know what that does to me, don't you?" he utters. "Don't you?"

"Yes. Sir. I'm sorry sir."

Reaching up to my mouth he pulls my lip from between my teeth. "You need to be reminded again that I don't; like that. Come here."

I take a step forward closing the distance between our bodies and he takes my arm pulling me face down to the bed. I'm able to rest my head on the duvet as he stands between my spread legs and pulls my hips up drawing them to him. His fingers grasp the waistband of my red satin undergarment as he slides them over my bottom and down my legs. His erection now resting between my cheeks he secures my wrists with his hand. As my body begins to shake in anticipation of the spanking I know I'm about to receive, his hand gently glides over my bare bottom softly caressing it. " You know I'm going to spank you, baby."

"Yes." I whimper still taking in the warmth of his hand on my bottom.

"Six." He barks. Then I feel the crack of the first blow of his palm.

"Ah," I whimper. But my stinging skin is soothed by his caressing palm. I relax again and emit a little satisfied sigh.

"Two," he barks as his hand comes down against my other cheek. The sting is intense and sharp causing a rush of arousal between my thighs.

"Okay baby?" he asks me as his hand caresses over me.

"Yes, sir."

"Good." Once again his hand comes down against me almost taking me off of my feet. "Three."

"Four," follows instantly without warning. Oh, God I may come undone. I can't wait for him to finish. I know he is as aroused as I am and I'll reap the benefit. Suddenly my belly jumps as his index finger glides between my thighs and into the wet engorged flesh. His finger hits the bundle of nerves nestled there and he rapidly strokes over it again and again.

"Ahh. Fuck." I growl back at him as my muscles tighten and jump.

"Like that?" he growls as his fingers push me to the edge.

"Yes. Please." In an instant his fingers move and sink inside me thrusting in and out over and over. My body is trembling as I push back against his fingers meeting their thrusting.

In an instant I hear and feel, "Five. You're soaking." Christian snorts. "One more baby. Your skin is incredible. It's so beautiful like warm, scarlet satin," he murmurs as he caresses my hot stinging flesh. "One more."

I feel the final blow as he lowers it against me. "Six." He growls. "There, there." He murmurs against my skin as he softly presses his lips against my bottom soothing the sting. His tongue softly glides between my cheeks to caress the small bud there almost sending me into convulsions. His tongue strokes and circles the delicate pucker as his hands firmly grasp my cheeks and separate them. It's all I can do to remain on my feet, but he supports me keeping his access to my behind. He shifts and his mouth finds me; his tongue now sinking into the wet flesh searching and exploring until it strokes across the nerve endings hidden there.

My gasp is audible as my belly jumps and muscles tighten with every stroke of his tongue.

"Mmmmm." He moans against me and the vibration resonates through my body. "Mmmmm," he moans again as he feverishly works his tongue against me. I'm almost unconscious with desire as the first flutters of my impending release ripple through me. God what he does to me. He can conquer my entire body with just his mouth. My chest is heaving trying to catch my breath as my body surrenders to him. His hands pull me closer to his mouth and he takes me in sucking and pulling until I can't resist any more. Every muscle between my thighs tightens as they await the sudden release. Then I'm there. The quick hard spasms tear through me as I begin to come against his mouth.  
"Ahhh. Ahhhh." I tremble against him unable to stop my surrender nor wanting to. He continues to suck and pull and stroke, not releasing me as I come for him; surrender to him. The spasms are so intense they are almost painful and as they begin to wane the tension starts to build again. The intense manipulation he is forcing on me is pushing me to the edge again and my body is begging for another release. Without warning I fall again as I erupt once more against his mouth. My body finally going limp he stands and my muscles tense when I feel his erection begin to probe and push against the wetness. In an instant he has forced his way in filling me hard and fast. "I'm going to fuck you now, baby," he growls and secures my wrists in his hand as he withdraws and slams forward again.

My body is thrust forward with every harsh entry he makes and he jerks me back to him by my wrists. With every thrust the air audibly leaves his body in bursts. "Oh fuck. This feels good." He growls in to the air as he continues his divine assault. Faster and harder; his grunts are becoming more desperate and needy as he pounds against me. My spasms are pulling him and taunting him. My cheek is scraping against the duvet with every push forward and his breathing is ragged and raw. "Shit!" he growls into the air then he falls over me resting his chest on my back. His tummy is trembling against me as he shudders and jerks; his body enduring the pleasure he has worked so hard for. His skin glides across the slick perspiration that mingles between us and I can feel the product of both our arousals as it begins to trickle down my thighs.

"Oh fuck, baby." He growls as he heaves against me trying to catch his breath. His hands glide over my skin until they reach my wrists which he immediately unties, pulling the red silk tie from between us. His heavy breathing is falling against my neck and his lips gently press against my skin trailing over my shoulders. He stands and pulls out allowing the fluids to breach my threshold and follow him out. He turns me over on my back and helps me scoot farther on to the bed. As I look up at him, his hair falling across his forehead and his face beaded with sweat, I open my arms for him to crawl in to. He buries his face in my neck as I engulf him and shower his face with kisses. "Oh Anastasia." He sighs as he relaxes in to me.

"I love you." I whisper against him as our naked bodies entwine and wrap each other. Our bodies gently heave as we breathe in unison trying to control our breathing. Feeling like silk his hair falls through my fingers as I comb my hand through it.

He looks up at me and moves to unfasten my collar. "No. Don't." I still his hand with mine. "I'm yours. I want you to know that."

"I don't need a collar to know that you're mine," he whispers to me. " I see it in your eyes every time you look at me. I hear it in your voice every time you say my name." He reaches up and brushes the hair out of my eyes. " I feel it in your body every time you make love to me. I know you're mine every day of my life Anastasia." I move my hand and hear the click as he removes the item that claims me as his, then hear it bounce as it rolls from the bed and hits the floor. He rolls over to lie above me and strokes my face as he searches my eyes with his. His lips gently brush mine before they spread kisses over my eyelids and nose. "You're the most precious thing in my life."

"Don't ever leave me, Christian." I beg searching his face with my eyes. "Stay with me always."

"I'd sooner pull my heart from my body and leave it behind to take its final beats than to than to leave you. I could easier survive without my heart than without you." He lowers his head to mine and takes my mouth with his as I wrap him in my waiting arms and legs pulling him to me.

* * *

I wake exhausted and cold and naked. After hours of making love, Christian must have pulled the cover up over me after I fell asleep, exhausted. Needing warmth, I turn over to snuggle against him, but find the bed empty. The moonlight pouring through the window is my only companion in the huge, canopy, four poster. After waiting for him to return from the bathroom I sit up and realize that he has not gone to the bathroom. I can see light seeping under the bedroom door and I look at the clock that's tells me it's just after two in the morning.

Planting my feet on the floor I grab my silk robe wrapping it around me to cover my naked body. Making my way to the door I open it and peer down the hall. The light becomes brighter and I can hear the strains of the piano coming from the parlor. What is he doing playing the piano? As I tie the silk belt into a bow I walk down the hall in the direction of the music. Getting closer I can begin to make out the faint tune. It's ….Rainbow Connection? Why in the world is he up playing Rainbow Connection? As I turn the corner to the living room I see him sitting at the baby grand in his boxers. His silhouette is framed by the city lights twinkling in the distance through the huge glass wall. My eyes are drawn to his chest mesmerized as his muscles flex with every note that he plays. Drawing closer, I quietly sit on the sofa and watch as he plays and softly sings. "Who said that every wish, would be heard and answered, when wished on the morning star?" His voice is soft and soothing as he sings the lyrics. "One day we'll find it. The rainbow connection. The lovers, the dreamers, and me." He finishes playing out the song. I'm puzzled as he says, "There is that better buddy? Now you go to sleep for Gail and Ana and I will be home before you know it. Okay?"

"Thank you Mr. Grey." I hear Gail's voice come over a phone. "He's much quieter now. He kept insisting on 'rainbows' and pulling me to the piano. He was crying so hard I didn't know what else to do. I can't play the piano. I thought maybe it was something you had played for him."

"It's okay Gail. I play it for him when he wakes up at night with a nightmare. Call me again if you need to."

"I'm sorry if I disturbed you and Mrs. Grey."

"No problem. Goodnight." Christian picks the phone up from its resting place on the piano and turns it off then runs his hand through his hair and sighs.

"What was that about?" I ask as I get up and walk to him at the piano.

"You startled me," he jumps. "I didn't know you were there."

"I woke up and I was alone." I whisper as I circle him in my arms and kiss his head.

"Gail called. Tommy woke up crying and wanting 'rainbows'. She tried everything and didn't know what else to do, so she called."

"I didn't hear the phone ring."

"I had it on vibrate. Besides you were conked out."

"Is he okay?" I ask as I lean in and kiss his cheek.

"Yeah. I think so. Probably just one of those nightmares. The song always seems to calm him down."

I turn and sit on the piano bench next to him facing him. "You and Tommy have more in common than we thought."

"I guess so. I just know how mom used to be able to calm me down when she played. It somehow reached a place inside that nothing else could."

"Maybe Tommy will be our piano player, instead of Teddy." I give him a smile and take his hand squeezing it.

"Maybe. Teddy still needs to learn something."

"Drums?" I give him a bit of a smile.

"He can do drums, as long as he learns something a little more civilized." He stares at me and smooths my hair with his hand. "Aside from the just fucked hair, do you know how beautiful you look by moonlight, Mrs. Grey?"

Standing up, I pull him by his hand. "No but you can spend the rest of the night telling me."

* * *

"I've got to go baby." I hear as I feel Christian's lips on my cheek.

"No. Don't go yet." I growl as I try to wake up.

"I have to get down to the office. I have a meeting with everyone then a conference call with Seattle," he says as he surrenders and sits on the bed next to me. "You look like you could use a few more hours." He smiles down at me.

"No. I'm up."

"You might be more convincing if you open your eyes. " he laughs at me. " You've never been up at the crack of dawn, Baby. Unless it involves sex."

"I'm just not a morning person." I growl as I pry my eyelids open. "I wish you could stay and snuggle."

"I know me too, but this is a business trip. Why don't you eat breakfast then go shopping or get a massage or have your nails done. Carl can take you anywhere you want to go."

"I know." I yawn and stretch. "I'll think of something to do until you get back."

"Just remember we have that reception at eight."

"I won't forget." I tell him. He leans in to kiss me and I cover my mouth. "Morning breath." I mumble through my fingers.

He leans in and kisses the hand covering my mouth. "Okay. Take it easy and I'll see you this evening." He stands up and grabs his jacket shrugging it on then adjusts his cuff links as he walks out of the bedroom.

I fall back down on my pillow and pull the covers up and close my eyes. Just as I'm about to drift off, I hear Rosa."Mrs. Grey?" she sings. "Mr. Grey say you're ready for your breakfast." She walks in and sets a tray on the table in the sitting room. Pulling the drapes back she lets the sun into the room full force and I'm forced to get up. I start to throw my cover off and stretch, but stop short remembering I'm naked under the satin duvet and Frette monogramed sheets. "Did you sleep well?" she asks.

"Yes. I did thank you." I pull the covers up to my neck as I watch her go about her business getting my breakfast laid out. She picks up my robe from the foot of the bed and hands it to me. Taking it from her I try to slide into it without exposing myself. Finally I stand up and tie the robe. "I hope the music didn't keep you up last night. I'm afraid Mr. Grey had it on the sound system," I try to apologize as I make my way over to the silver tray with the Wedgewood china tea service on it and my breakfast.

"Oh, no. It didn't bother us. It's better when you come." She tells me as she picks up the clothes and underwear from the floor and puts it in the laundry basket.

"Why is that?" I ask as I take a sip of my tea and then take a bite of the buttered English Breakfast toast.

"When you don't come. Aye, he plays that piano all night. So sad. He miss you so much." She stops and looks at me her hand on her hip. She looks so different from Gail. Her uniform is pale gray and she has on heavy stockings and black orthopedic shoes. Her salt and pepper black hair is pulled back in a twist at the back of her head. "Much better when you're here." She gives me a smile. She walks to the closet and grabs my cocktail dress. "I'll freshen this for you."

"Thank you, Rosa. The breakfast is wonderful."

"Good Mr. Grey said to give you fruit and toast and tea. I put a few pieces of bacon on there too. Can I fix you anything else?"

"No this is fine."

"You need Carl to take you anywhere today?" she asks.

"I'm not sure yet. I may need to hit FAO Schwarz. Grace will expect something." I give her a smile.

"Okay. Just let me know. I 'll let you eat your breakfast." She disappears with my dress in hand.

I could get used to all this pampering. Leaning back into the sofa I sip my tea as I look out over central park and the city behind it. What can I get into today?


	88. Chapter 88

_**Fifty Shades…Full Circle**_

_**Chapter 88**_

Putting the finishing touches on my hair and makeup and slipping into my clothes, I grab my purse and head out of the bedroom. As I do my phone rings. Looking at it, it says Grey Enterprise Holdings. Maybe Christian is using an office phone to call instead of his cell. "Hello?"

"Mrs. Grey? This is Elaine Larkin."

"Elaine Larkin?"

"Yes, Mrs. Grey. I'm Mr. Grey's administrative assistant here in the New York office. He asked me to call and see if you wanted me to set up any appointments for you today."

"Appointments? I don't understand."

"He wanted to know if you would like to go to a day spa, have your hair done or have someone come to the apartment." She pauses for a moment. " Or perhaps go to any of the couture houses to shop. I'll be glad to set up anything you need while you're here."

"Oh. Well. I hadn't thought about it. I actually was just on my way out to shop for the kids."

"Well, what time will you be back? I can have someone up there for a massage, mani-pedi and then do your hair for this evening?"

"That does sound relaxing. I guess that would be okay. I was planning on being back here just after lunch, say about one."

"Very good. Do you have any preferences?"

"Preferences?" I ask.

"Yes ma'am. Which salon would you prefer to send someone over?"

"Oh gosh, I don't care. You pick one. I trust your judgment, Elaine is it?"

"Yes ma'am. Elaine. It'll be a pleasure. Enjoy your shopping and I'll have someone at the apartment say around two? That will give you time to get back and have some lunch."

"Great. Thank you Elaine. And thank my husband for me."

"I will ma'am. And it's a pleasure. Goodbye"

Okay. I wonder why I haven't heard about Elaine. I guess he doesn't have to tell me about everyone he hires.

"Hi Carl. Are we ready to go?" I ask the attractive gentleman in the dark suit and tie standing in the kitchen with Rosa.

"Yes, ma'am. The car is in the garage."

"Rosa, I'll be back in time for lunch and some people are coming over about two to paint my fingernails or something. Evidently I'm in need of some work for tonight." I give her a sneer. "I just wanted you to know should a stranger show up at the front desk asking to come up and paint me."

"Yes ma'am. I'll let the security desk know you're expecting them."

Carl holds the elevator door as I enter and we make our way down to the garage and the waiting black Audi SUV. It's a short ride down Fifth Avenue to the store. I could have almost walked it, but I knew that was out of the question. As I exit the car I'm met by a couple of photographers snapping pictures. The doorman inside the store shoos them away after I enter. It's a kid's dream and I get a personal shopper to help me navigate the huge store. After a couple of hours and a haul for the kids I exit the store. Once again my picture is taken as the store clerks help load the SUV with my treasures for the kids. I can't wait to show it all to Christian. I got him a gift too. I'm sure he'll think it' silly, but I liked it.

"Carl?"

"Ma'am?"

"Do you know where Mr. Grey's office is?"

"Yes, ma'am."

"Could we run by there?"

"Yes, ma'am, Mrs. Grey. I'll call and let Mr. Grey know you're coming."

"Oh. No. Don't bother him. I know he's busy. I just wanted to drop by and see the building."

"Yes ma'am. It's not too far."

As we ride through the city I hear my phone and dig it out of my purse. It's the house. I hope nothing is wrong.

"Hello?"

"Uh huh."

"Grace?"

"Mama?'

"Grace? What are you doing baby?"

"I talkin' to you."

"I miss you." I tell her.

"I misth you too mama."

"Grace does Gail know you're using the phone?"

"No. I got it and push da button."

"Okay. Well when we get finished talking you take the phone to Gail , okay?"

"Uh huh." "Mama?"

"Yes baby."

"Where isth Daddy?"

"Daddy is at work right now."

"I can cawl him?"

"No sweetie. Don't try to call Daddy. He's busy right now, besides you don't need to be using the phone without Gail."

"When you be home?"

"In two days. Can you wait two days?"

"Uh huh." "Mama?"

I have to laugh, "Yes Grace?"

"You bwing me a pwesent?"

"I got you a present this morning."

"Weally? What it is?"

"Well it won't be a surprise if I tell you."

"I won't tewl anybody."

"But it's a surprise for you. If I tell you then it won't be a surprise."

"Ukay. I thee it when you come home?"

"Yes sweetie. Baby where are you?"

"I in your bedwoom."

"Okay. Where is Gail?"

"She getting' Tommy's cwos on."

"Okay. Can you go find Gail for me?"

"Uh huh." I hear breathing.

"Grace?"

"Uh huh?"

"Go find Gail and take the phone to her for me, okay?"

"Ukay."

I can hear her running through the house as I wait to hear Gail's voice.

"GayGay." I can hear Grace say in the back ground.

"What is it baby?" Now it's Gail.

"Mama wanth you."

"What?"

"Hello?" I finally hear Gail's voice on the other end.

"Gail?"

"Ana? I didn't hear the phone ring."

"It didn't. Grace called me, somehow." I have to laugh a bit.

"Oh my goodness. How did she do that?"

"She probably hit the speed dial button. Heaven knows who else she's called."

"Ana, I'm so sorry. I was getting Tommy dressed and she must have sneaked off and gotten to the phone."

I have to laugh. "It's okay. I just wanted to make sure the phone got hung up. Is everything okay there?"

"Yes. We're fine. Are you having a good time?"

"So far. I'd forgotten how beautiful the place is here."

"I'm glad things are going well."

"Me too. We needed a little time to ourselves. I'll let you go. Thanks for taking care of the kids."

"Okay. I'll keep Grace off the phone and make sure it gets hung up properly."

"Let me tell her good bye."

"Mama?" I hear her little voice.

"Hi baby. I just wanted to say good bye."

"Ukay."

"Mom and dad will call you later this evening, Okay?"

"Uh huh."

"Bye bye."

"Bye Mama."

Good heavens. Poor Gail. She has her hands full.

"Pulling up to the building ma'am." Carl lets me know. Looking out the window I see the gray stone building. It looks old, not new and modern like Grey House and not as tall as Grey House. There are large glass doors at the entrance with hug Art Deco letters made out of metal over the door. Carl parks in front and the doorman opens my door and assists me to my feet.

"I'll just be a few minutes Carl."

"I'll wait here ma'am , unless you need me."

"No I'm fine. I'm just going to look around a bit."

Entering the building the first thing I see is a security desk with CCTV monitors and two security guards. The floors are polished granite and the walls are granite and steel. The lobby is plush with potted palms and overstuffed furniture and dark hardwood tables.

"May I help you, ma'am?" I'm asked by one of the guards.

"Um. No. Actually I'm here look around a bit."

"Ma'am you can't just look around."

"Of course. Actually I'm here to see Elaine…um …Elaine Larkin."

"Your name?"

"Ana Grey."

"One moment." He picks up the phone and calls Elaine. "There is an Ana Grey here to see you. She isn't on the list for today."

"May I speak to her, please?" I ask.

Taking the phone from him, "Elaine? It's Mrs. Grey. I just wanted to stop by for a few minutes. Please don't bother my husband. I just wanted to look around and see the building."

"Yes. Mrs. Grey. Come on up. I can have someone give you a tour of the building."

"Thanks. I'll be up in a minute." I give the phone back to the nice guard who gives me a visitor badge in return.

"Elevators are over there Mrs. Grey." He points to the bank of elevators." Administration is on the twelfth floor. Code is 0618."

"Of course it is. Thank you." After getting on I decide to take my own tour. I want to see what goes on here without everyone bowing and scraping. First off I push all of the buttons, so we have to stop on every floor. At least I can peek out and see what they all look like. Stopping on two, the door opens to some sort of business floor. Offices and cubicles and a reception desk. I decide to get off and see what it is. The first thing I see is a reception desk and a blonde dressed in black sitting behind the desk with a phone headset on.

"May I help you?" the blonde immediately asks me.

"Yes. What floor is this?"

"Human Resources, ma'am. May I direct you somewhere?"

"Oh, no. I know where I'm going. Thanks." I quickly slip away from her and walk down the rows of cubicles and copy machines and computers. As I walk past I peek into any office doors that are ajar. Everyone is bustling. I pass one cubicle where several people are chatting.

"Just stay on your toes. Grey's here today and tomorrow. I've heard he's hell on wheels if you piss him off." I overhear them talking. _Oh, you have no idea, _I want to stop and tell them. I'll let them find out for themselves. I finish wandering and find my way back to the elevator. Getting on there are three young women already in the car, two brunettes and one blonde. Sort of average, dressed in black, all carrying a cup of coffee.

"Oh, God. I knew he was good looking, but have you seen him?" one brunette almost squeals.

"No. Have you?" the blonde asks.

"Yes, I saw him in the lobby this morning when I was coming in. Fuck, is he hot."

"I've seen his picture, but is he really better looking in person?" the other brunette wants to know.

"I'd go down on him without having to be asked twice. And swallow. He's gorgeous." She rolls her eyes. " And you can just tell he's ripped under that Brioni suit." She smiles as she recalls my husband.

"Did you get a look at….?"

"At what?"

"You know?" the blonde smiles and rolls her eyes.

"Well I looked, but the flagpole wasn't up. If he's hung, it just isn't fair." The brunette tells her.

"Can you imagine? Hot, rich and hung. Damn." They all giggle.

"He's married." The second brunette chimes in.

"I know. Some bitches have all the damn luck."

"You think he messes around?"

_Okay now we are treading on thin ice._

"He has to. No man looks like that and doesn't cheat. He has to have women throwing themselves at his feet everywhere he goes."

"Yeah. You're probably right. Maybe she isn't so lucky after all."

"Hey, he could cheat on me all day long just so he comes home to my bed every night and I have a black Amex card." They all laugh. I don't think it's very funny. Little do they know I fuck him every night, own half of everything and he's never slept with another woman since he met me. Plus I have his kids. Oh, life is good Mrs. Grey, I smile to myself. Finally we hit a floor and they get off passing me by with no notice. I get off as well, just to see what floor they work on. I stop one of the brunettes, "Excuse me. What is on this floor?"

She looks at me like I have two heads. "This is finance. Can I help you?"

"No. Thank you. I just wasn't sure." I let her go about what ever business she does and wander around for a bit, just looking everything over. I smile at the people in the little cubes and offices as I make my way around the floor. Looks pretty much like the other floor. More offices than cubes on this one. Still the floor is again carpeted in gray industrial carpet with the occasional potted plant and clumps of light gray cubicles placed around the floor. Unlike Grey House, there are no floor to ceiling windows, just the windows in the offices that line the perimeter of the floor. So much for this floor. Pretty boring. No noise other than the hum of machines and the tapping on keyboards.

Once again I find my way back to the elevator and get on, this time by myself. I go up another couple of floors and the doors open. This time I know where I am. The plush carpeting, heavy décor and men in suits give it away as the legal department. There is a receptionist in front of me as I get off. There is nowhere to wander on this floor. Just plush offices and women in dresses and pumps wearing pearls and dressed in black. What is it with all the black clothing? Is this place some sort of vampire brood? "May I help you?" I'm asked by the receptionist.

"Oh, no. I think I got off on the wrong floor." I tell her and quickly head back to the elevator and push the button. Getting back on I look at my watch. Shit! I've been wandering around for almost thirty minutes. As the doors open on one more floor I decide to look around the last floor before administration. This place has people buzzing everywhere. There are conference rooms, big offices, and once again the ever present gray cubicles. I stroll through as though I owned the place. Wait. I do own the place. People look at my visitor badge and smile but no one stops me. People are in the break room getting coffee, standing in clumps talking and laughing, and drinking coffee. This is a much more relaxed floor than the others.

As I make my way around I pass a group of men in trousers and white shirts; sleeves rolled up and ties loosened. "Holy shit! Move it." I hear one of them declare looking almost stunned. The group turns around and looks past me, the color draining from their face. Did I do something? People are scattering like ants. Just as I'm about to turn to leave I hear a familiar voice. "May I help you?" as I feel a hand grab my arm. After I jump out of my skin I turn around to see my husband glaring down at me his mouth in a thin line.

"Oh. You scared me." I let out a gasp.

"Mrs. Grey. What a surprise. Let's go up to my office."

"Of course. I was actually just on my way up."

Christian and I smile as we walk toward the elevators. Two security guards are flanking the elevators. "Thank you gentlemen." Christian nods to them as we pass them to get on and the elevator. As the doors slide closed, I think Christian will explode. "What the fuck are you doing?" he growls as he runs his hand through his hair.

"What? What do you mean?"

"Why didn't you tell me you were coming?"

"I didn't want to bother you." The elevator doors slide open and as we get off we paint on our smiles.

"Oh, I see you found her." The attractive brunette smiles at us.

"Yes. Thank you. Elaine. We'll be in my office."

"May I get you anything?" she asks behind us.

"No." Christian snaps.

His arm is locked in mine more to lead me than to show affection, and I follow Christian into his office. It's totally different from the Seattle office. Plush dark gray carpet, tufted oxblood leather sofa with nail-head trim, hunter green velvet chairs and dark paneling on the walls. His desk is a huge mahogany thing with a leather chair behind it. Elegant printed drapes are on the window behind his desk.

"Sit." He barks at me.

"I'm fine."

"I said sit." He glares at me. I quickly take a seat on the leather sofa. "Now why didn't you tell me you wanted to come to the office?" he asks me as he walks to the fridge and grabs a bottle of water.

"Christian, it was just spur of the moment. I got finished at the toy store. Oh you should see what I got the kids…" he hands me the water and I open it taking a sip.

"Right now I don't give a fuck what you got the kids."

"Why are you so pissed off?" I ask in disbelief at his attitude.

"You should have said something."

"I never announce myself at the Seattle office. And you're always glad to see me."

"Ana. You were supposed to be up here a half hour ago. I was about to tear this building apart to try to find you."

"I wasn't lost. I was just looking around a bit."

"No one knew that. You checked in downstairs and were supposed to come straight up here. When you didn't show up, I had no idea where the fuck you were." He almost barks. "I was worried sick."

"Worried? Why? Besides I told them not to tell you I was here."

"Why not?"

"I didn't want to bother you. I just wanted to see the office. I was fine."

"Did you really think you could come in the building and they wouldn't tell me? Christ. For all I knew you had been kidnapped between floors."

"Well that's just silly. Who would kidnap me in the office?" I try to blow it off.

"I have no fucking idea. Besides security was getting reports that someone with a visitor pass was wandering around the building." He almost yells at me. "Security was all over this place looking for whoever it was."

"Christian. I'm sorry. It just never dawned on me that I couldn't walk through the building." I hear him sigh and finally relax his shoulders. He comes over and sits next to me. When he does, I move away putting a little distance between us.

"Come here." He puts his arm around me and pulls me back over to him. "I didn't mean to get upset…I was just worried when no one knew where you were."

"Well, I didn't mean to upset you either. I really didn't think that I was doing anything that would worry you. The object was not to bother you. I just wanted to slip in and look around and leave." Christian takes the water from my hand and takes a long drink. I lean in and give him a kiss on his cheek trying to elicit a smile from him. I succeed.

"I'm just glad you're safe. You know how I get when I worry about you."

"Well, I'm fine. I'm sorry I worried you and I didn't mean to cause a panic in the building." I try to apologize.

He grabs my head in his hands. "Come here." He growls as his lips find mine and he tries to devour me. "Don't scare me like that again, Ana Grey," he whispers against my lips.

"I won't." I whisper back.

"I have a meeting in a few minutes, but I can take you to lunch when I'm finished."

"I can't. Someone arranged for me to have work done this afternoon. I need to get back and eat so I can be painted and polished for this evening."

"Okay." He rest his forehead against mine. "Can I trust you to get home in one piece?"

"I'm an adult. I think can make it back to the car."

"Well to make sure. I'll walk you back down. I have a few minutes."

"Okay. I'd like that." I take my water back and take another sip as we get up from the sofa. Christian and I exit his office arm in arm and walk to the elevators.

"I'll be back up in a minute. I'm walking my wife down to the car." Christian tells Elaine.

"Yes sir."

"Nice to meet you Elaine." I wave over my shoulder as Christian ushers me toward the elevator.

"You too, Mrs. Grey."

We get on the empty elevator car and Christian uses his key to lock out the other floors. "Aren't you going to feel my ass?" I ask him as we descend.

"No. right now I want to throw you against that wall and fuck you senseless so bad I could shit. If I feel your ass, I'll never make to back that that meeting." He smiles down at me as he growls.

The doors open and Christian walks me through the lobby to the security desk and removes my visitor badge handing it to the security guard in the navy suit. "I found your wandering intruder," he smirks at him. "This is my wife Grundy. She's fairly harmless."

"I'm glad we found you Mrs. Grey." He smiles as he takes the badge.

"I wasn't lost. I knew exactly where I was all the time." I smile back at him.

Christian walks me out the front door and opens the door to the SUV for me. Before I get in I turn around and put my arms around his neck just before he gives me a huge passionate kiss right there on the sidewalk. I give him a smile just before sliding into the big black car. "See you in a bit."

"Just go straight home, please," he warns me. I give him a smile as he closes my car door.

"I guess we have to go home." I tell Carl. I can't help but think about that kiss and smile to myself as I watch the city passing by and think, _take that all you lady vampires. _


	89. Chapter 89

_**Fifty Shades…Full Circle**_

_**Chapter 89**_

Thinking about what those girls in the elevator said is making my blood boil. I know my husband is hot. I know he's rich and I certainly know what he's like in bed. But I can't get the mental picture of that girl going down on him out of my head. I'm almost pissed off at him for something he hasn't done. I shouldn't have dropped off the radar when I went to the office. I know how he worries that something will happen to me. It just never crossed my mind that he would know I was there and be waiting for me.

Aw shit. Maybe I'll feel better after some lunch and a massage. After pulling into the garage back at our building Carl escorts me back up to the apartment and then goes back down to bring in the things I bought for the kids.

"Hi, Rosa."

"Mrs. Grey. Did you have a good shopping trip?"

"I just shopped for the kids. Nothing big."

"Oh. Well that can be fun too. Can I get you some lunch?"

"Actually Rosa, I'd love some lunch."

" Okay. I have some fresh crab salad made and fruit?"

"Actually I'd love a big sub sandwich. So we have anything to make it with?"

"Of course. I know how Mr. Grey love his subs. I always have it when he's here. What kind do you want?"

"Let's see, maybe turkey , bacon, swiss and avocado with lettuce, tomato and sprouts. Can you do that?"

"Sure. You want fruit too?"

"No. I think potato chips."

"Okay. You want to eat on the terrace?"

"Yes. I think that would be lovely. It's a sunny day and there's a breeze up here."

"You go change and I have it ready in about ten minutes."

"Great. Oh, Rosa? Do you have any of the cannoli left?"

"Yes ma'am. Your appetite is good today. Usually Mr. Grey always trying to get you to eat." She gives me a smile.

"For some reason I could eat a horse today." I almost growl.

Getting to the bedroom I slide out of my slacks and top and toss my jewelry on the dresser; then throw on a terry robe and pull my hair into a ponytail. I scrub my face and get my make up off and by that time Rosa calls me for lunch. Walking out on the terrace is like walking into heaven. The flowers are blooming and Rosa has the wrought iron table set complete with white linen table cloth, fresh flowers and the floral luncheon china. After I sit down she comes out with my sandwich and chips then pours me a goblet of iced tea. She sets a cup of fruit in front of me as well. She is determined I'm going to eat fruit.

"It's so fancy Rosa. It's beautiful. Thank you."

"You okay Mrs. Grey? You look…um…"

"Pissed off?" I interject as I take a huge bite of my sandwich.

"Um. Yes. In a sad mood maybe?" She gives me a sympathetic look.

"It's okay Rosa. Yes, I'm a bit pissed off. Oh, not at you, just in general."

"I'm sorry. I can do anything?"

"No. I don't really even have a good reason. I just overheard some women talking about Mr. Grey in an elevator."

"Ahh. I see. Mr. Grey, he's very good looking. I think that some women might talk about him."

"It's what they were saying that was upsetting."

"Yes. I can see women might think about trying to be with him. But you don't worry. He loves you. As many times as he comes here alone, I never even hear him talk about another woman. He just misses you and the children. He plays that piano all night long because he misses you."

I have to give her a smile, "I know Rosa. I trust him. I just hate to hear other women talk about wanting to …..well… do certain things with him."

"I know. Women can be mean and ugly. You just pay them no mind. Mr. Grey love only you. You don't worry." She's so sweet with her little Spanish accent trying to make me feel better. "I know how you feel. You know my Carl…Ahh," she smiles." He's a looker too. I have to keep close watch. But I know he loves me. It's hard to be married to these sexy men." She gives me a wink. "But we can do it."

I have to give her a smile. "Thank you Rosa. I'm glad you understand."

"Okay. You ring if you need anything."

"I will." Devouring my sandwich, I try to calm down. I've heard things like this before and I let them roll off. For some reason this chick bothered me. I know my husband is fucking hot, but I just get so tired of hearing it sometimes.

"Mrs. Grey the person is here to do the massage. Where you want her?"

"Oh, I guess she can set up in the bedroom. I'm coming." I walk out and greet the young woman who has arrived to give my relaxing massage. Good luck with the relaxing part.  
"Mrs. Grey, I'm Ariel. I'm here for your massage." She extends her hand and I shake it. "Where do you want me?"

"We can set up in the bedroom. Right through there." I motion to our bedroom.

She goes about setting up her massage table. "When we finish I'll need you to take a nice warm bath to get the toxins out. Then Frankie and Joanie will be over to do your mani-pedi and your hair." Really? Frankie and Joanie?

"Wow. I should be ready to go by the time I'm done." After she is set up she leaves while I jump on the table and pull the warmed sheet over me. During my massage I try my best to relax, and she keeps trying to encourage me to as well. But it just ain't working.

"Goodness you are so tense. I can feel it. Just try to think about something pleasant and relax." She encourages me. When she gets finished with the deep muscle stuff she goes back over me with a warm salt oil scrub. It feels incredible. Finally finished, she goes in the bathroom and runs me a warm tub with lavender bath salts while I regain consciousness, wrap the sheet around me and get off the table. After she packs up and departs I run and jump in my waiting tub and relax and drink the bottled water she set out for me. I kinda' like this detoxing part. After an nice long soak I get out and dry off and put my fluffy terry robe back on. Waiting for the next round I lie down on the bed to rest for a bit after all the relaxing.

* * *

"Mrs. Grey?" I hear Rosa whisper.

My eyelids peel open and I see Rosa standing at the end of my bed. "Mrs. Grey. Two ladies here to see you."

"Oh, Okay. Thank you. I'll be right out." I get myself off the bed and go out to greet Frankie and Joanie. I show them the bedroom and they go in and set up a chair and table for my nails and fill a portable basin for my feet. I follow and sit in the overstuffed chair in my bedroom and dunk my feet in the warm soapy swirling water. All this beautifying is becoming a full time job. Frankie spreads out a selection of nail colors. I choose nude. Frankie gives me a strange look.

"Is something wrong?" I ask her.

"Well, you are going out this evening. Wouldn't you like something a bit more…"

"More what?"

"Oh, something a little more exciting, up town, something to go with your cocktail dress?"

"Oh. Well. I guess." I shrug my shoulders. "You pick something for me." I tell her.

"How about this?" she holds up a bottle of red polish and gives me a sly grin and a wink.

"Oh, gosh. I've never worn anything that …..bright, but with a name like that."

"It'll look fabulous. Trust me?"

"Well. What the hell. Why not?" I give her the go ahead for the 'Safe Word Red'. While Frankie begins the arduous process of making my finger and toe nails presentable for New York Society, Joanie begins to drag a brush through my hair.

"Did you wash it today?" she asks.

"No. I wasn't sure what you would want me to do." I tell her.

"Good. It styles better if a day out from washing." She tells me.

"Well I'm glad I did the right thing." I have to laugh a bit.

Joanie begins the process of brushing and pulling and twisting and pinning. After she has finished with my hair she pulls out her makeup bag. Frankie is finished with my nails and has started on my feet. "I thought I'd do your make up for this evening."

"Oh. Okay." I shrug. I seem to have lost control of my person at some point today.

"Have you ever thought of a spray tan?" Joanie asks me as she brushes the foundation and blush over my cheeks.

"No."

"You'd look great in one. Just enough to give you some color." She tells me. "Someone can come to the house and do it for you."

"My husband tends to like my skin the color it is," I tell her.

"What men like and what is fashionable are usually two different things." She laughs.

"Well. As long as my husband is happy with it and I'm happy with it, I think I'll leave it the way it is. But I'll think about it once we get home."

Within the hour my hair and makeup are done and my nails are drying. Frankie and Joanie are packing up to go.

"Ladies? Can you leave me a card please? I may need your services next time I'm in town." They both give me cards and I sign their tickets adding an extremely generous tip for each of them. That's one thing I do enjoy about having all this money is the ability to give it to someone who needs it. After they leave Rosa brings me a big glass of cold fruit tea and I head to the bedroom to read and relax for a while.

I still can't get that woman off my mind. For some reason she just hit a note with me and the situation seems so real. I just keep seeing her mouth on his and her hand on his zipper. Concentrating on this book is impossible as I feel tears prick my eyes and spill down my cheeks. I really don't know what is wrong with me. I've overheard women talking about Christian before and it never really bothered me. I lean over and punch a pillow pulling it down on the bed and resting my head on it. I know he loves me. I have no fear of him ever cheating on me. What we have is almost perfect. But how long does perfect last if there is such a thing as perfect. Men who love their wives succumb to infidelity all the time. I can feel tears welling in my eyes as my stupid mind dwells on this absurdity. If Christian wanted to cheat he'd have every opportunity_. Ana get it off your mind, _ I tell myself as the tears trickle down my cheeks. Damn I'm ruining my make-up. I've never been insecure about our relationship before. Why now all of a sudden? It's that stupid, stupid cow of a woman. I wish I'd never gone to the building now. I'll close my eye for a few minutes. Maybe a nap will wash it all away and I'll stop thinking about it.

* * *

"Hey. Sweetheart?" I feel a soft kiss on my forehead.

"Huh?" I try to open my eyes. "Christian? What are you doing here?" I growl at him.

"Well last time I looked I lived here. At least I hope I still live here."

Suddenly I wake up enough to come to my senses. I sit up throwing my arms around him, "Oh, Christian. You came home. I missed you so much."

He chuckles a bit and holds me, "Well I'm glad you missed me. It's only been a few hours. What's up? I mean besides that make up all over your face." He presses his thumbs under my eyes and tries to wipe the shadow and mascara away. "Sweetheart? Have you been crying?"

"No."

"Yes you have. What's going on?" he asks as he tries to tuck a strand of hair back in to place. "If it's about the office today, baby, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to get mad. I just got worried when no one could find you. I couldn't bear it if anything happened to you."

"No. You didn't hurt my feelings. I'm fine." I sniff a bit. "When did you hire Elaine?"

"You're upset about Elaine? Did she say anything to upset you?"

"No. No. she's been very nice and helpful. I had just never heard about her. She's brunette and so are a lot of the others in the building."

"Well, she came with the purchase. Elaine has proved to be competent when I need her to be and stays out of my way. As a matter of fact, they all were there when I purchased it. I can't fire people just because they have brunette hair. That would be unfair, not to say unethical and just a bit illegal. "

"I know. It's just…."

"Ana what is it? I can't fix it if I don't know what it is."

"I just feel silly. It's happened before and it's never bothered me. I don't know why it bothered me today. It's probably just hormones."

"Do I have to spank it out of you?" he grins at me.

"Don't tempt me." I give him a pout. "While I was in the elevator today, I overheard some girls talking."

"Oh, I see. They said something you didn't like?"

"Yes. They were talking about how handsome you are and one of them was talking about how she'd like to…to go down on you…. And swallow."

"Oh? Really? Did you catch her name?" he smiles.

I give him a little fist to his gut. "Stop that. It just bothered me. I know it's stupid. I know you love me, but I just get so tired of having to hear women fawn over you and speculate what they want to do to you."

He pulls me in his arms, "Baby, I've put up with it all my life. I just don't pay it any attention. I can't do anything about my face." He kisses my head. "I guess I could see a plastic surgeon and have him mess me up a little."

"Christian! No!" I reach up and stroke his cheek with my fingers. "Don't talk like that. I love that face."

"Well I don't know what else to do, Baby. This is the only face I got." He cups my face in his hands and stares into my eyes, "Ana Grey. You are the only woman I love, ever have loved or ever will love. I'm not going anywhere, Baby. I belong to you from the hair on my head to the toenails on my feet and everything in between."

My hands reach up and cover his as they cup my face. "I know. Women can be tricky and devious when they want something. I just don't want any of them tempting you."

"Baby, the only woman that can tempt me is you. In fact I doubt I could even get it up for anyone else."

"Oh now you've gone too far." I roll my eyes at him. " That thing has a mind of its own and it never misses an opportunity to point toward the ceiling." Christian envelopes me, capturing me in his arms, kissing my neck and tickling me. I have to start giggling.

"Oh you think so? You think I can't control my dick do you?" He rolls me over still tickling me. I can't stop giggling.

"Christian stop." I giggle as he continues to kiss my neck. "Christian, you'll ruin my hair and make-up. I just had it done."

"I hate to tell you but someone's already undone it."

I look up at him. "What do you mean? I spent all afternoon getting fixed for tonight."

"Babe, I have no idea. All I know is something bad happened to it."

I push him off and run to the mirror and am horrified. There is black mascara and eye shadow all over my cheeks and under my eyes. My red lipstick is smeared all over my lips and chin."I look like a clown." My hair has come undone and there are tendrils hanging everywhere from the sagging, once sleek chignon. "Oh, no. I spent all afternoon on this. I look awful."

Christian walks in and puts his arms around me. "You look fine."

"No I don't look fine." I growl.

"No. You really don't." he confesses. "You look like a hot mess." He kisses my cheek. "But you're an awfully cute mess. What say we use my uncontrollable dick to justify that mess on your face."

Christian pulls up me in his arms and off the floor until his lips can reach mine. "I love you so much, Christian Grey."

* * *

Well that looks a lot better. I have finally gotten my make-up redone, getting it as close as possible to the original work done earlier this afternoon. Nice minimal eyes and intense red lips to match my nails. I had to take my hair down and start over, but it looks good. I decided to wear the platinum pearl and diamond earrings that match my collar. They go well with this dress.

"Here you go Mrs. Grey." Christian hands me a flute of champagne as I finish getting dressed.

"Can you zip me?" I turn around and Christian pulls my zipper up as I take a sip of my wine.

"You smell good." I feel a quick kiss on my neck as he finishes. "Like those earrings too." He growls as he kisses my neck again. "Well I must say this is a vast improvement over earlier this afternoon."

"Thanks. I think. You look like you stepped off the pages of GQ…..as always." I tease him.

"Can't fight nature." He grins as he adjusts his cufflinks. Damn that man makes a tux look good.

I get the big bow adjusted at my neck and walk over to the bed sitting down to put my shoes on. Christian gets on one knee in front of me and takes my shoe and begins to strap them on my feet. Electricity fires through me as his fingers stroke the back of my knee down my calf to my foot. "Don't wrinkle your pants." I remind him.

"I won't." Finally getting them strapped on, he kisses my knee as he gets back to his feet.

"What's with all the kisses this evening?"

"Nothing. Can't I kiss my wife?"

"Yes. You can. As much as you like."

"Good. I intend to take full advantage of it. Ready to go?" He asks.

"Yes. Let me get my purse and I'm all yours."

"What I need you to understand is that _I'm_ all yours." He assures me as he puts my wrap over my shoulders.

"I know." I give him a nod and stroke his hand as it rests on my shoulder.

* * *

"Where is this thing?" I ask him as the city melts away and we obviously begin to enter the suburbs. Suburbs filled with mansions and gates.

"It's at Parkinson's home. He and his wife are having it for us." He reaches over and takes my hand giving it a squeeze.

"Who's Parkinson? Someone I should know?" I ask.

"He runs the New Your division. He was Vanderberg's right hand. I kept him on and gave him New York."

"Wow. You don't usually give anybody anything. He must be good."

"I hope so. I wanted to bring Ros out to run the division, but I can't spare her and she said she'd quit if she had to move to New York."

"Can't say as I blame her. New York is a bit different from the mountains and trees and rain of Seattle."

"Parkinson seems to be good…..so far anyway. I'll keep him until he fucks up. I think they're giving this to say thank you for letting me keep my job and my ridiculous salary." He continues to play with my hand, kissing my fingers. "I like the nails. You don't usually wear red."

"I know. It was the manicurist's suggestion. Guess the name."

"I can't."

"It's 'Safe Word Red'." I smirk at him.

"Hmm. I knew I liked that color." He shakes his head. "When did all this become so mainstream?"

"What?"

"Kinky fuckery. When did it become the norm instead of the exception?"

"I don't know." I give him a smile. " Perhaps you weren't so dark after all. Maybe you were just ahead of your time."

He snorts, "I seriously doubt that."

"You've always been quite a visionary in business. Perhaps that carries over into all aspects of your life." I tease him.

"You keep thinking that, Mrs. Grey. I have a few avant-garde things left to spring on you."

"I'm bound with anticipation, Mr. Grey."


	90. Chapter 90

_**Fifty Shades…Full Circle**_

_**Chapter 90**_

_**A/N: A lovely reader, Jesse, sent me two links that I think are precious: (My guess is FF won't let the web addresses post, but you can find them on TWCS or PM me and I'll try to send it to you.)**_

_**Tommy playing piano:**_watch?v=UlJPWiWqPXw&feature=

_**Teddy playing drums:**_watch?v=Y4bVrRt8WDM&feature=

* * *

Arriving at the gate we are ushered through after the gate security checks with Sawyer and identifies us as being on the list. Pulling up to the porte-cochère the valet opens the door and we exit the car. The maid at the door takes my wrap and we are met by Bob Parkinson and his wife Rachel. They are a lovely older couple in their fifties.

"Mr. Grey. Mrs. Grey it's lovely to see you. Thank you for coming." Rachel gives a warm welcome.

"Please, it's Christian. And this is my wife Ana." Christian says as she stares into his eyes.

"Yes. Christian. Ana." She gives us both a smile. "Come in. Pleasure to meet you, Ana."

"Bob, I'd like to introduce my wife Ana." Christian says as he shakes Bob's hand. Pleasantries over they show us inside and we take a glass of champagne from the waiter.

"Hmmm. Not bad." Christian grumbles as he takes a sip. "I'm paying him too much if he can serve this to this many people."

"Oh, Christian. They're just trying to be nice." We survey the room full of tuxes and cocktail dresses. "They have a lovely home."

"Yes. I suppose. It's large anyway." About that time Rachel walks up to us. "Christian? May I steal your wife? I'd like to introduce her around to some of the other ladies."

"Of course Rachel. But don't keep her too long. I can't do without her for very long at a time." Christian turns on the charm and gives her a panty melting smile and she blushes in return. Rachel takes my arm and leads me around the room introducing me to various groups of impeccably dressed women all married to men who work for Christian. "We're just all in love with your husband, you know." Rachel whispers to me.

"Oh? Really?" I ask. Please. Tell me something I don't already know.

"Yes. Most of us have met him over the years at the Vanderberg's and were just taken with him. He's so attractive and is such a gentleman. Such a nice man. You're a very lucky woman, Ana."

"Yes. I am a lucky woman." I say for the millionth time. As we chat with a group of ladies, I happen to notice Christian talking to a group of employees. The one in the white and black cocktail dress standing inches from him and licking her lips catches my eye. It's hard to keep my mind on the conversation. "Ladies, it's a pleasure meeting all of you, but I think I need to catch up with my husband." I make my excuses and walk over to Christian and the group he's talking with.

"Ah," Christian holds out his hand as I walk over and I take it in mine. "I'd like to introduce my wife, Ana. Ana this is Tim Jackson, Al Spicer, Leland Jenkins and Kathy Pimberton. They are all managers in our finance department here."

"Lovely to meet all of you."

"Mrs. Grey." Kathy calls my attention.

"Please, Ana."

"Ana, you look so familiar. Have we met before?"

"I think we might have. I rode up on the elevator with you and a couple of other ladies, earlier today. I believe I stopped you and asked what floor I was on."

"Well I hope I was helpful." She laughs a bit and flips her hair just before the light bulb goes off.

"Oh, yes. You were very accommodating. Thank you." I try to give her a smile.

"Yes. Well, good. I'm glad." She shies away. "I think I need to go find my date. It's a pleasure. Good evening Mr. Grey. Mrs. Grey." She slinks away, I hope to never been seen again.

Christian snakes his arm around my waist and we sip our champagne and mingle until Bob calls us all to attention so that he can make a glowing speech introducing Christian. Christian makes his way to the front of the group and thanks Bob.

"I'd like to thank our gracious hosts for opening their lovely home to us all this evening. And Bob thank you for the glowing words of confidence. For those of you who have not had the pleasure, I'd like to start by introducing my lovely wife Ana." Christian uses his had to motion in my direction. "I really don't have anything prepared. I just want to thank each and every one of you who have stuck it out and worked diligently with me to make this transition go as smoothly as it has. You have my confidence, my gratitude and support. I appreciate each and every one of you and look forward to working together to make Grey Enterprise Holdings an ethical, environmentally responsible and profitable enterprise. My door is always open and I look forward to hearing from each of you. Welcome aboard everyone." He raises he class and toasts his employees receiving a round of polite applause. He makes his way back to me and we mingle a while before making our excuses.

After thanking everyone and the Parkinson's I get my wrap and we walk out and slide into the back seat of the car. "Oh, God my feet hurt." I grumble.

"Don't take them off. Please?" Christian asks as he grabs my legs and pulls my feet into his lap.

Checking to make sure the privacy window is up, I have to give him a smile as I lean back on the seat with my head on the arm rest. "I won't if you don't want me to." I pull my knee up and place the heel against his crotch. He flinches a bit as I apply a little pressure forcing the spike heel into the fine wool fabric covering his manhood. His expression changes and his eyelids become heavy as the pain turns to pleasure and I hear the gasp that escapes him as his breathing increases. His hands softly skim over the black thigh highs that cover my legs and he gently spreads kisses from my knees to my feet. "Oh Fuck." He growls as his head falls back. I had no idea the gentle pain of a spike heel applied to his scrotum would have such an effect on him.

"Do you like that?" I ask him.

"God you have no idea." He growls back at me as he relaxes his thighs and allows me to caress him with my shoe. I can feel his crotch becoming hard under the sole of my Louboutin and I continue to massage the sole and heel against him. As I lie back and take pleasure in watching him squirm and grind his pelvis against my strappy heel, he moves over kissing his way up between my thighs. Without warning he dives under my crinoline skirt and I feel his breath on the crotch of my panties. Oh, fuck. I'm so turned on I may explode at the slightest touch. My body is quivering in anticipation of his touch.

His head moves from side to side as he rubs his nose against the crotch of my panties. I hear the rush of air as he breathes in my scent, and I feel the vibration as he growls against me.

"Oh, fuck." I almost cry. His teeth gnaw against the fabric that separates his mouth from me. In an instant he grabs my panties and pulls, not stopping until they are down my legs and off over my shoes. Christian pushes my thighs up and apart as his mouth finds my wet flesh as expertly as if it were radar guided. Oh my God in heaven, he's on fire. Whatever has gotten into him, I want him to keep it. His mouth is pressing into me as his tongue licks and caresses over me again and again.

"Mmmmm." He hums against me causing me to gasp at the vibration. My hands reach down and push my skirt aside as I twist them in his hair.

"Oh. Oh fuck baby. Shit." I whimper. Every muscle in my body is tense but not as tense as the muscles in my crotch that are preparing to explode with pleasure. The occasional spasm slips through as he devours me like he never has before. "Christian. Oh, God Christian," I whimper my body trembling against him. His hands move under my thighs and up gliding over my abdomen as his tongue and lips circle and suck and tickle. "Christian, I'm…I'm gonna' come."

"Uh huh," he snarls against me without easing his carnal attack. I can feel my body begging for relief. My breathing is ragged and hard to catch as the electricity starts from his tongue and spreads throughout my body. In an instant I feel my body begin to surrender. I lose control and one fist grabs the leather of the arm rest of the seat and the other twists in his hair. My body stiffens and trembles as the spasms begin against his lips. "Oh, Fuck, Christian." Is all I can manage to utter as I come hard against him, not once but twice before he moves is mouth.

"Fuck. Come here." He grumbles as he wastes no time in moving up and pressing his mouth hard against mine. I can taste myself as it lingers on his face and in his mouth. His tongue wildly dances with mine as his heart races and his breathing coarsens. No sooner do I hear the zip of his trousers, than I feel his erection probing against me. Grabbing my butt cheeks in his hands and without warning he slides in me to the hilt. "Oh Fuck." He gushes against my ear and his fingers dig into my butt as he begins to thrust.

"Oh, God baby." I manage to whisper to him as his hands pull my hips to meet his with every push. Pulling my legs up I allow him to go as deep as he can, burying himself in me to the hilt. He begins to thrust fast and hard and his breathing is rapid and unmetered as he races to relieve himself. "Shit." He growls again. "Oh, fuck, baby." I hear him breath against my ear as he tenses and begins to shudder against me. In a few moments I hear him start to breathe again and his body begins to relax against me.

We both lie still and crumpled in the back seat of the car and try to catch our breath. "Do you have a tissue in your purse?" Christian whispers.

"Yes. It's on the floor." I whisper back. Christian fumbles around until he grabs my evening bag and opens it dumping everything out until he finds the tissues. He places it against my crotch as he pulls out and gently stops the flow of fluid he has released. As I take the tissue and try to clean up before sitting up, he grabs another and wipes himself before placing his manhood back inside his tux pants.

"Are you okay?" he asks as he helps me sit up.

"I couldn't be better." I smile at him as I continue to wipe up and look for my black satin panties.

"Looking for these?" he smiles over with my panties dangling off on his finger.

"Yes. Thanks." I grab them and shimmy into them then pull down the lighted mirror and try to fix my hair and make- up. Christian leans in to straighten his hair and adjust himself. "How do I look?" I ask him.

"Beautiful. Like I just fucked the hell out of you." He grins.

"Oh, Christian. I can't go in looking like that." I begin to try to adjust myself again.

"I'm teasing. You look amazing. You're fine." He reassures me. "Those fucking shoes belong in the Smithsonian. Never get rid of them."

"Trust me. I'll be wearing these when I'm eighty."

Sinking back into the leather seat he grabs my hand as we relax on the long drive back to the city. "It was the black and white cocktail dress, wasn't it?" he asks out of the blue.

"What?"

"The girl that upset you. It was the Pimberton woman wasn't it? The one in the black and white dress."

"How did you know that?" I ask him amazed.

"To start with I know you and your body. I could tell by the way you tensed up that something was going on. Then there was the fact that she kept invading my personal space and every time I looked at her she was running her tongue over her lips and flipping her hair. Finally when you said you had run into her on the elevator earlier today and then she excused herself."

"Is that why you just fucked the shit out of me?" I have to ask.

"No, I fucked the shit out of you because I love you and I had an overwhelming desire to make you come and then fuck you. No hidden messages."

"Yes that was her. But don't say anything to her. I think she understands things now."

"I would hope so. I don't have time for these little games with the employees." He pauses, "Speaking of games. I got the strangest phone call today. I was just walking into a meeting and my cell rang. When I looked at it, it was from the phone at the house, so I stepped outside to take it. When I answered it all I heard was breathing and gurgling then a lot of giggling."

I can't help but giggle. "What? Do you know who it was?" he asks.

"It was Grace. She called me too. Did she say anything to you?"

"No. Just breathing and giggling."

"I don't think she realized what she was doing. When I heard her I asked if it were Grace and she sounded surprised that I was on the other end."

"How did she do that? She doesn't know numbers yet."

"I think she started pushing buttons and hit the speed dial for you and then for me. You're one and I'm two on speed dial."

"Damn. Does Gail know? She may be calling North Korea for all we know. She could start an international incident."

"Yes." I have to laugh at his exaggeration. " Gail knows. I made Grace take the phone to her. I think Grace is taking them off the cradle and punching in numbers. Remember when Teddy called 911 and we had to let the police in to look around to prove that it was an accident and we weren't being held hostage by some criminal."

"We were being held hostage by a four year old boy as well as I remember," he chuckles.

"Yes sir, officer. I'll take care of it. It won't happen again." I mimic him. "Then I recall a big donation to the FOP."

We both sit back and laugh remembering their escapades. "I wonder what Tommy has in store for us?" I speculate.

"Heaven only knows. They certainly come up with some shit," he snorts.

"But of course, you were perfect. You would never have done anything like that." I lean over and snuggle in against him.

"Me? Nah. I never did bother with the phone. I do seem to remember getting in my dad's convertible and starting it and trying to drive it down the driveway. Unfortunately being six, I couldn't seem to see over the steering wheel and operate the pedals at the same time."

"What happened?"

"James. James was trimming hedges and saw the car rolling down the drive with no one in it. He ran over and jumped in and stopped it. Luckily we have a long driveway and I didn't have time to drive it out into the street."

"I never knew that. Did you get in trouble?"

"A little. It was just the beginning of a long line of situations I got myself in to over the years that my parents had to deal with."

"I kind of like that you were a bad boy."

"Yeah?"

"Uh huh. Good girls are attracted to bad boys."

"Well you certainly got yourself one. I was one bad ass teenager. You name it, I probably did it. God I hope there are no paybacks with our kids. You don't deserve that."

"Christian, I'm sorry I got so upset today over that Pimberton woman. I usually let it just roll off my back. I mean it's usually just annoying, but today, I guess it just hit me wrong and I couldn't shake it."

"Do you know what I'd do if I were on an elevator with three men talking about you like that? The carnage would be indescribable. The only thing that would roll off my back are their heads as I ripped them off one by one."

"I can see that happening." I tell him matter of factly.

"What time is it?" I reach over and take his wrist turning it so that I can read his watch. "Goodness what kind of watch is that? There's so much stuff on it I can't tell what time it is." I ask him.

"It's a Vacheron Constantin Quai de I'lle."

"What, you couldn't find a Timex?" I tease.

"It's eleven thirty. Why?"

"I want to call the kids before they go to bed."

"Perhaps Grace could handle the call?" he gives me a grin.

"Hush. Where's your phone?"

Christian digs out his phone from his jacket pocket and dials the house. "Gail. Mr. Grey. How is everything?" "Good. Are they still up?" "Can we talk to them?"

"Put it on speaker." I whisper to him. It takes Gail a bit to collect them but we finally hear Teddy's voice.

"Mom? Dad?"

"Hey sport, how's it going?" Christian asks.

"It's okay I guess."

"Hey Sweetie, it's Mom. I miss you."

"Miss you too, Mom."

"Are you behaving?"

"Yeah…"

"Hi Mama. Hi Daddy." We hear Grace butt in.

"Hi baby. Are you minding Gail?"

"Uh huh. I bein' good. Daddy when you be home?"

"We'll be back Saturday. Two more days. Are you leaving the phones alone?"

"Uh huh. I done touch 'em."

"Tommy? Are you there?" I ask.

"Yesth."

"How are you, Buddy?" Christian asks.

"Ukay."

"What have you all been doing?"

"We go fwimmin'." Tommy tells us.

"You did? Did you have fun?"

"Tommy and me wear bawoons on aw arms." Grace interjects.

"Yeah, we wear bawoons an jackets. An..an..Gaiw and Tawor fwim too." Tommy throws in.

"I can swim. I don't need those." Teddy adds.

"Jack go fwimmin' too." Grace chimes in.

"He did?" I ask.

"Uh huh. He can fwim good."

"I'm glad you're having a good time." Christian tells them.

"Ukay."

"Well, Mom and I have to go, but we just wanted to check in and say hi and we miss you."

"We misth you to Mamma Daddy." Grace hollers.

"Mind Gail and Taylor and be good."

"We will."

"Okay. You guys sleep tight and Mom and Dad love you." Christian lets them know.

"Me too. I love all of you." I add before we hang up. "Bye babies."

"Bye. Byeby. Bye Mom and Dad." They all jockey for the last word.

Christian returns his phone to his pocket. "Fuck. I still can't believe we have all these kids."

"I know. But I'm glad we have every one of them."

Christian reaches down and plays with the big organza bow at my neck. "That dress looks great on you, but it would look even better lying on the floor."

"Last time I wore it, you took it off with your teeth." I smile up at him.

"Yes, I do seem to remember something about that." Christian smiles and chomps his teeth together several times.


	91. Chapter 91

_**Fifty Shades…Full Circle**_

_**Chapter 91**_

"Mmmmm." I growl and stretch awake. Christian's warm breath is falling on my skin as his lips softly press against my flesh and trail kisses over the upper mounds of my breasts. "What are you doing?"

"Kissing your breasts," he murmurs up to me.

"I can see that." I comb my fingers through his hair as his mouth lightly presses against my skin. The gentle weight of his body lying across mine is sensual and inviting.

His finger tickles as it softly traces the edge of my nightgown, then dips below the beige silk to expose a nipple. He gasps, "Look what I found."

"You didn't find anything. You knew it was there."

"Yes but it was hidden and I found it. Finders keepers." Without hesitating he sucks it into his mouth and slides his arms around and under me pressing my chest to his face as he suckles.

"Ummmmm,God." I groan cupping his head in one hand and stroking his hair with the other. "Mmmm. Morning sex."

"Who says we're having sex?" he grumbles up at me, nipple still in mouth.

"That little fella' pressing against my thigh seems to want something." I give him a smile and wrap my arms around him and pull him up to me. "Come here you."

"I'm on my way." He grins as he moves up and propping on his forearms, his mouth seals over mine. His lips glide over mind as his tongue licks to gently part them. Our tongues slide against each other twisting and turning and his curls fall through my fingers while I stroke his hair and massage his scalp with my fingertips as my leg curls over his thighs.

"God your beautiful when you're half asleep," he whispers down as he searches my face and strokes my hair.

"You're pretty cute when I'm half asleep too," I moan up at him.

"You'll pay for that remark later, Mrs. Grey."

"I certainly hope so, Mr. Grey." I give him a half grin as I pull his mouth to mine, "Now come here and finish what you've started."

"Fuck I'm glad I married you," he growls as he props on his elbows and takes my mouth with his. I want to melt at the warmth of his hand as it skims over my curves; over my breast, around my waist down my abdomen, around my hip to my ass and down the back of my thigh. His fingers gather my silk gown until he secures the hem; his hand slips under the fabric and his palm retraces his trek this time against my flesh. He stops and massages my cheek and lifts my gown to my waist.

"God you're so warm," he whispers against my ear. Without thinking my hips begin to circle and grind against him. "And soft," His erection is so hard it's almost painful as it presses into me and my belly jumps as his fingers pull through the folds between my thighs. "And wet."

I move under him and wrap my thighs around his waist then gasp as I feel his erection slide through my folds hitting all the right spots. He rolls his hips again and his erection slides back. Another roll of his hips and I pull my knees up allowing him to catch at the entrance of my threshold. He pops in gently, "Ooops. Found something else." Giggling a bit, I looking up into his face his gray eyes are looking back down at me and we exchange an anticipatory smile.

His head bends down as his lips find mine once more and his hips roll again as he pushes his way in and, gently rocking in and out, he finally has his full length inside. I can feel my walls gently pulsing against him, surrounding him, pulling him to me. "You feel so damn good," he growls as he rests his forehead against mine.

"So do you," I whisper. My thighs circle his waist as he starts to pull out and then glide back in again. The sensation of his body in mine is incredible. The feeling of him filling me physically as well as emotionally is beyond description. "I love you baby," I murmur up to him as my hand cups his face.

"I love you too," he mouths back as he buries his head in my neck and begins to thrust in and pull out. My arms engulf him and my fingertips dig into his back as he thrusts rhythmically and steadily. My breathing is ragged and my belly is trembling as he hits the sensitive nerves over and over again. It's causing random contractions that close around him as he sweetly glides in and out facilitated by the slick arousal. Rhythmically and steadily he continues his drive. Every muscle between my thighs is taught and on edge; begging for release. My belly is quivering as his slides across mine with every undulation and roll of his hips. As he pushes us closer to our release his thrusts become faster and harder. My ear is filled with the sound of his coarse, ragged breathing as he is losing himself in the pleasure of the moment. He groans on every thrust forward as the air rushes out of his chest.

With every stroke my insides tremble and stir as my body strains with pleasure and anticipation. "Come on baby," he murmurs against my neck as he rises to prop on his forearms and looks into my eyes, "Come for me. Come for me baby."

I nod my head as I try to catch my breath and I feel my body aching to surrender to him. I want to melt into him; I need to lose myself in him. Every thrust pushes me closer; driving me toward my release. Finally my body can't take any more; it has gone as far as it can go. I'm at the edge just waiting to fall into him. With one more roll of his hips he gives me the final push "Oh fuck, baby." I gasp as my mind becomes a blank and I tighten my arms around him and bury my head against his neck. Every muscle in me explodes as I begin to spasm against him and tremble in his arms.

"That's my girl," he whispers against my cheek. "That's my baby. God I love you."

As I whimper out the last few shudders of my orgasm, he begins to roll his hips again, gently thrusting then quickly picking up speed and determination. I'm spent but meet his every thrust and bury my fingers in his bottom trying to pull him in as far as I can. His grunts and groans are so animalistic and erotic as he drives himself grasping for his orgasm, until finally I can hear a loud moan and "Ahh, shit," as he stills and presses against me. My body absorbs his shudders as he trembles and jerks; lost in the pleasure. Cupping his head in one hand, I pull him to me with the other and whisper, "You're mine, Christian. You're mine."

In seconds his body relaxes against mine and we engulf each other; our arms tightly around one another. "Ohhh, fuck, Baby," he growls as he holds and rocks me in his arms. In a moment he looks down at me and rubs his nose against mine, "Yes. I'm yours Anastasia. All yours. Every inch outside of you and every inch inside of you. I'm yours."

I have to giggle a bit at that. "I wish you could stay inside all day." Softly stroking his hair I kiss his nose. "I like having you here."

"Well since I can't go to the office with you hanging off of my dick, I suppose I need to move."

"Noooo. Don't go, please." I tease and beg. He relents and relaxes against me again. I can feel him begin to shrivel and retreat, like one of those deflating garden hoses. Reaching down I gently take his balls in my hand and massage them.

"What are you doing?" he asks.

"I want more."

"You always want more. You never get enough. You are one insatiable woman."

"That's why you love me," I tease.

"It's not the only reason but, yeah, I do like that about you." He grins down.

"Just once more? Please?" I bat my eyes and pout for all I'm worth, knowing he won't be able to resist. I can feel him beginning to grow again.

"Aw fuck, woman. If you keep rubbing my balls, I'll never get out of this bed," he groans. " But please, don't feel like you have to stop."

"That was my plan."

"I'm very familiar with you and your plans," he gasps as his eyelids close and his head relaxes. He rolls his hips and crawls farther on top of me as I trap him in my arms and pull him to me.

* * *

"Now that you've bought out FAO Schwarz, what do you have planned for today?" Christian yells from the bathroom as he drags a razor through the foam coating his face.

"I could come to work with you and run shotgun on all the females I the office."

"You could, but I'm a big boy. I've been able to fight them off so far. I think we're good."

"Oh, I don't know. I may just hang around here and read and relax."

"That sounds like a winner." He finishes and walks out of the bathroom his towel hanging low around his waist. Damn. The defined abs and the pecs that move with every stroke of the towel over his head. "Ahhh." I shriek as he throws the damp towel in my direction landing on my head. "Hey! Watch it buster."

"You watch it," he growls as he rips off his towel and throws that at me as well. As I grab to intercept the damp towel he takes a couple of giant steps and lands on me bouncing up and down on the bed. "Gotcha' now," he laughs as he traps me in the sheet covering my nakedness.

"Oh yeah?" I tease back giggling.

He pulls the sheet back that covers my bottom and using his palms he spanks my butt cheeks like he's playing bongos.

"OW. Shit that stings." I growl at him.

"I know. Nice and pink. I do love to see a round, firm pink ass on a woman." He leans in and gives the warm flesh a quick kiss and a caress. "Especially on my wife."

"It better be only on your wife." I frown at him rubbing my now sore butt cheeks as he gets up and goes about looking for his clothes.

"You'd better stop playing around and get some clothes on. Yesterday Rosa came in with breakfast while I was still in bed."

"I know." He grins. "I told her to."

"She said you had. I was still naked in bed."

"I know. That's how I like to leave my women; naked in bed."

"What's with this 'all my women' shit this morning?" I roll over, prop on my elbow and watch him.

He shrugs as he steps into his boxers. "I don't know. Just sounds good."

"Well unless you took up pologamy overnight, I'm the only woman you got. And it better stay that way."

"As insatiable as you are, I couldn't handle another woman. I'd never get any work done." He grumbles as he pulls his undershirt over his head. I love watching him get dressed. I love the way he can be so old fashioned and proper about some things and then be so uninhibited and over the top about others. Who would ever guess that the man with the undershirt, full Windsor and Italian wingtips loves to tie me up and spank me before he fucks my brains out? The no-nonsense, immovable, CEO likes to see me in a collar, blindfold and handcuffs? The loving husband and totally devoted father can tie me to a bed, fuck me until I can't speak and then turn around and do it again ten minutes later? God what a lucky girl I am. I marvel at him while he finishes getting dressed.

"Where do you want to eat tonight?" he asks.

"We could eat here and relax. Just sit on the sofa, drink some champagne and look out over the city. We don't have this in Seattle."

"Yeah, but we don't have the Great White Way in Seattle either. Or the restaurants New York does." He shrugs on his suit jacket and comes over to sit by me on the bed. "Sure you don't want to get out?"

"If you want to. It doesn't matter to me, as long as I'm with you."

"Well that was the correct answer." He leans in and gives me a quick goodbye kiss. Then leans in again and gives me a soft lingering kiss. "Goodbye, Mrs. Grey. Have a good day."

"I will. And we can eat anywhere you want to." I smile at him and trace his lips with my finger.

"Okay. I'll be home early. I just want to wrap up a few things before we head back to Seattle."

"Be careful and I love you."

"Love you too." He gives each breast mound a soft quick kiss then stands up to leave. As he grabs his wallet and stashes it in his jacket pocket.

"Christian?"

"Yeah, babe?'

"Don't send Rosa in with breakfast. Tell her I'll be out in a while."

He gives me a sly grin and a wink as he exits the bedroom door and heads off to Grey Enterprise Holdings, NY.

* * *

"Good Morning Rosa. How are you this morning?" I ask as I wander into the living room. Rosa is busy dusting. I can't get used to the little gray uniform she wears. Gail was always in a white blouse and black skirt until she took over the kids. Now she dresses more comfortably to keep up with them.

"Good morning Mrs. Grey. I can get you some breakfast?" She stops her work and gives me a smile.

"No. Thank you. I think I'll just wander into the kitchen and look around for something."

"You sure? I'm glad to fix whatever you want."

"No, I'm fine." I'm used to getting what I want in my own kitchen at the house. Besides I've never just fiddled around in this kitchen before.

I pad into the huge professional grade kitchen and it's almost overwhelming. It's huge. There is a monster double subzero refrigerator with glass doors and an attached wine cooler, a double wall oven, a steam convection oven, a huge gas cook top with eight burners and three warming drawers. Good grief. All this stuff and we only come here a couple of times a year. After looking in the fridge, I decide on bacon, scrambled eggs and toast. Pulling everything out I lay it on the butcher block island in the center of the kitchen. I see some fresh pastries on a covered glass stand and grab one taking a bite. It's filled with fruit and cheese and sugar. Yum. Finding the teakettle I fill it with water and turn it on to heat while I cook.

"You need any help, Mrs. Grey?" Rosa sticks her head in and asks.

I have to laugh a bit, I'm sure I look like a munchkin in this kitchen. "I'm fine, thank you. I do have one question. How do you reach the pots and pans?" I nod to the utensils hanging from a rack above the island.

"Oh, I show you." She walks over and presses a button on the side on the island and the rack lowers to a reachable height.

"Oh, my. Thank you." I continue going about the business of preparing my breakfast. Gail would love all this shit. It's just so over the top, so…..so….Christian. I've certainly been in this kitchen before and foraged for food, but I've never really tried to cook a meal in it. Rosa is always right there to do it. Since we're here so seldom, I always let her. I just thought this would be an adventure. After getting my meal and my tea, and cleaning up my mess, I head out to sit on the terrace and enjoy the sunshine and my breakfast.

"You go out today?" Rosa asks me as she brings me the morning paper.

"Oh, thank you." I take the paper. "No I think I'll just hang around here and read and relax. It's hard to do back home with the kids always in and out." I open the paper and start to peruse the pages.

"Okay. You let me know if I can get you anything?"

"I will. Thank you Rosa." I can't pass up the Best Seller list and check to see who we have on there. Hmm, an ad for The Sleeping Beauty Ballet. That looks interesting. I'd love to see it, but Christian hasn't always been a fan of the ballet. Don't know why. He's usually a fan of all things cultural. I think it's the men in tights thing.

Okay, seems it's okay to team floral prints with stripes. Steps to get a summer glow. Holy shit. There's an article on Christian and there's a picture of that kiss on the sidewalk yesterday just before I got in the car. "True Love in the Billionaire's Club: Can love last under the weight of the billions?" Hmm. Wonder if we're going to last? I begin to read the article that starts with a brief history of Christian's love life, the gay rumors, the bad boy image. Crap, I don't need to read another article that gets it all wrong. Nothing but speculation and conjecture about his, our personal life. At least that picture has been my calling card on New York. Put that on your silver tray and deliver it.

Okay enough of this. Time for a nice bubble bath. I have the warm water running in the huge marble egg and add the lavender bath salts. The smell of lavender floats out of the bathroom making the bedroom smell of flowers. Rosa has already pulled the curtains back allowing the sunlight to fill the room and has made the canopy bed with the fluffy duvet and ridiculous number of throw pillows. I love that she changes the sheets every day. Maybe when Myra leaves, I'll have the new housekeeper do that. Christian and I usually destroy them every night anyway.

By the time I've put my hair up, the tub is full and calling my name. I hit the button and turn on a few of the jets. I hate using them all, it makes me feel like I'm sitting in a cannibal's stew pot. Okay, I'm a bit strange at times. Just enough to make the water swirl and relax is good. Dropping my robe I step in and sink down into the lavender clouds and adjust the bath pillow behind my head. I can see the city skyline from the huge windows as I relax. Soon after I close my eyes, I'm startled by a knock at the door. "Yes, Rosa? Come in."

"I brought you a tea." Rosa smiles as she sets a glass of cold fruit tea on the edge of the tub. It's garnished with a sprig of mint and an orange slice.

"Oh, thank you." I give her a smile and as she leaves I reach for my reader and pull up a book I've been wanting to get to. I think I could get used to this. As I read the water keeps swirling and circling my body. It's so relaxing and if I prop my knees up it hits just at the right spot. It's gentle but consistent and my heart beat is getting a little rapid. After losing my concentration, I put my reader aside and lean my head on the pillow allowing the water to move and swirl. Without thinking my hands slide over my abdomen and up my belly cupping my wet breasts. The flesh is soft and firm as I knead it and roll my nipples between my thumbs and fingers. God this is crazy. Christian and I just had sex all morning.

But I don't really want to move. The feeling of the warm water targeted between my thighs is something I don't really want to stop, in fact I want it. I lift my legs and lay each calf on either side of the tub. The bubbles slide and drip off of them like melted candle wax, as the water continues to spin and churn. Closing my eyes, all I can see is that beautiful Christian smile as it comes closer and closer until he is pressing his lips to mine and kissing me soft and deep. My hands travel my body from my inner thighs, up my belly which is jumping and quivering, up my abdomen and to my breasts where they knead and caress the soft flesh and erect nipples. Oh, God, I'm so close. I love sex with my husband, but I like these little unexpected pleasures by myself as well.

Every muscle between my thighs is taught and begging for release. My belly is trembling and quivering. If I were home this would be the time one of the kids screams for me. But I'm not. God, I'm close. I can't take much more. One tiny adjustment of my angle and in an instant I feel myself tensing just before my body surrenders. Oh Fuck. Oh, Fuck. Oh, Fuck. The spasms start between my thighs and my mind blanks as I give myself over to the water and the smell of lavender and the orgasm. Oh, God this is heaven. But I'm quickly pulled out of my heaven when I hear the phone ring. As the contractions begin to subside I hear a knock, "Mrs. Grey? Telephone for you. Is Mr. Grey."

"I've got it," I yell back panting to catch my breath. I pick up the receiver next to the tub.

"Yes." I snap.

"Excuse me?" I hear Christian's voice.

"I'm sorry," I pant. "I'm in the tub."

"Oh. You sound funny. Just what are you doing in the tub?" he asks and I can hear the sex in his voice.

I'm still panting to catch my breath, so I take a sip of tea to wet my mouth. "Just taking a bath."

"Mmmm. Got the jets on?" he asks.

"Uh, huh." I groan back.

"I see," he growls into the phone. "How do they feel?"

"Pretty fucking good." I growl back.

I can hear him laughing through the phone. "Well save me some."

"Always. Did you want something?" I ask finally catching my breath.

"Not really. Just wondering if you caught the morning paper?"

"Yes. I did. So, do you think we'll make it under the stress of all this money?" I tease.

"Something tells me we will, Mrs. Grey," he chuckles. "Be thinking about dinner, although, staying in is looking more attractive all the time."

"I'll put some thought into it. Now go back to work. I'm trying to relax." I insist.

"Sorry. I didn't mean to interrupt your…er… bath. If I didn't have a meeting waiting, I'd have you describe it to me, blow, by blow."

"I'll tell you about it later." I chuckle as I take another sip of the cold tea.

"Okay. Don't leave anything out."

"I won't." I assure him with a giggle.

"I love you," he whispers into the phone.

"I love you too. Now go."


	92. Chapter 92

_**Fifty Shades…Full Circle**_

_**Chapter 92**_

A/N: To answer a lot of people with the same question I'm going to reprint a the conversation Ana had with Teddy in the last chapter of Clarity when they were discussing what happened to Sam:

["Well, I was sort of liking to have a little brother, but we can just plant another seed can't we?"

"Oh, honey. I'm not so sure about that." This will be harder than I thought.

"Why not?"

"Well, when I fell, it hurt the place where the baby grows. The doctor couldn't fix it so she had to take it out. Mommy can't grow another baby, sweetheart."

"Oh. Dad didn't tell me that," He pouts.]

I've had so many people want to know if Ana is pregnant, because of the crying, the eating and her overactive sex drive. The answer is that her uterus is gone. Nowhere to grow a baby. I had the best time writing Ana's pregnancy and would love it if I could do it again. But I think the fact that we want her to be pregnant and she can't be, helps us relate to the disappointment that Ana and Christian are going through knowing that they can't have another child.

Now could she get pregnant? Technically yes. She has ovaries and if Dr. Greene didn't adequately close the opening of her cervix then sperm could enter her abdominal cavity, find the fallopian tube, find a released egg and fertilize it. (If any sperm could do it, Christian's could.) But then they would be looking at an ectopic pregnancy and another life or death situation and the loss of another baby. Since she still has ovaries, she still has cycles and deals with hormones. Perhaps, that is what is going on. Just a monthly need for Kleenex, ice cream and Christian Grey. I think we can all relate.

And thanks for all the nice reviews and PMs. I really read them all. That answered, let's jump back in.

* * *

"Hey, You're ahead of me." Christian snakes his arms around my waist and gives me a kiss as I hand him a chilled glass of Bollinger.

"Not really. I was waiting for you."

Christian takes a sip and lays his briefcase on the table in the foyer. "You're not dressed. Aren't we going out?"

"Well, we went out last night. I sort of wanted to stay in and enjoy our last night at the apartment. Besides it's raining cats and dogs out there."

He shrugs, "Okay. I want to hear all about that bath you took today anyway."

"I had Rosa fix your favorite and I thought we could snuggle on the sofa and look out the windows, drink champagne and relax. Remember we, pick Virginia up tomorrow and will have her for a week, then Dad's wedding right on the heels of her visit." I give him a quick kiss as we walk into the living room. "We're going to be really busy for the next few weeks. Besides this is the last time we'll be totally alone for a while."

"Since you put it like that, staying in sounds better and better. And I have a feeling you've done something very naughty today."

"I'm sure I need to be brought into line for something." I look up through my lashes and give him a sly grin.

"Okay. You've convinced me." He loosens his tie. "I need to get out of this suit. Come help me?"

"Sure." We head back to our bedroom so Christian can change out of his work clothes. I crawl up on our sofa in the bedroom and sip my Bollinger as Christian proceeds to get out of his suit.

"Have you talked to the kids today?" He asks me pulling his undershirt over his head exposing his chest and abs.

"No. I haven't. I thought we could do it this evening. It's nice to get away, but I always miss them so much and can't wait to get back to them."

"Me too. I even miss that crazy dog. Isn't it weird how you can get so attached to something so quickly?" he speculates as his trousers pool at his feet and he's down to his boxers. Ooops. Boxers gone.

"I think it's the unconditional love. It's hard not to love something that loves you no matter who you are or what you do."

"I think he's been good for the kids. He came along at the right time."

"He's been good for you." I have to give him a smile. " You should have had a dog years ago."

"Oh, probably so." He gives me as smile as he pulls his jeans up and zips them.

"I think it's easier to relate to something or someone you know won't judge you. You could have used that."

"You don't judge me," he smiles over.

"No. And I love you no matter what."

Christian walks to the sofa and takes my hand as he sits down next to me. After taking my glass from my hand he sets it on the table and pulls me close him. Lying back on the sofa he takes me with him and engulfs me in his arms. Snuggling in against him my knee slips between his and he gives me a huge hug and kisses my head. "Ahh," he sighs against me. "It's good to be home."

"I thought you enjoyed working?"

"I do. But I like being with you better." As I look up, he looks down and our eyes lock. I feel a shiver run through me as his fingers caress my cheek and he cups my face lowering his until his lips touch mine. After a brief contact he backs up and looks at me just before lowering his head again and pressing his mouth to mine; this time it's a firm deep passionate kiss. My hand moves up to run my fingers through his hair and his hands press against my back pulling me closer.

I can feel a sigh escape me as our lips move across one another. His tongue gently parts my lips and we kiss deeply and passionately. He moves over me and I lie flat on the sofa as he presses his chest against mine; his weight falling on me. His hips begin to move against mine and I wrap my leg around his thighs while our mouths continue to explore; needy and wanting each other.

"Mmmm. You taste like champagne." I murmur to him.

He smiles against my lips, "You taste like heaven."

"And just what does heaven taste like, Mr. Grey?" I tease between kisses.

"It tastes exactly like my wife." We hear a knock at the bedroom door, "God. Who the fuck is that?" he grumbles.

"It could only be one person." I have to giggle. "Yes Rosa?" I yell.

"Sorry to disturb, but dinner in ten minutes. Just want to let you know."

"Okay. Thanks. We're on our way." I yell back.

"What an inopportune moment," he grumbles. "And what I have in store for you will definitely take more than ten minutes." He leans in for one more deep kiss before getting up. As he stands over me he stares down and takes my hand. "God you're beautiful. I'm one lucky son of a bitch."

As he helps me to my feet I stand up and put my arms around his neck and lightly kiss him. "Yes. I do believe you are."

He swats my ass just before slipping into a T-shirt and we head out to dinner. I've had Rosa set the table with fresh flowers and the room is dimmed other than candlelight that is flickering light over the massive oil paintings on the walls. The champagne is in the silver bucket and our salads are waiting for us on the chargers. Christian uncorks the wine and pours us each a glass as we dive in on the spinach and strawberry salad with bleu cheese and candied pecans.

"Mmm. I'm starved. I didn't have time for lunch today," he grumbles as he devours his salad. "What are we having for dinner?"

"Chateaubriand rare with Béarnaise sauce, roasted new potatoes and French green beans with blanched almonds and sour cream. Is that okay?"

"You know it is. It's my favorite." He gives me a wink and a smile. "Did you have Rosa make a desert?"

"Chocolate Napolean." I give him a grin.

"Oh, you are a bad girl, aren't you?"

"Only when it comes to you."

"So, that's two."

"Two what?" I question him with a puzzled look.

"Two transgressions today."

"I don't understand."

"You pleasured yourself today while I wasn't there and now you've had Rosa make all this food, when I don't need it."

"Well trust me, it's not the first time I've pleasured myself while not in your presence and I doubt it will be the last and I had her make the Napoleans because I knew you liked them."

"Well, we'll discuss after dinner, but I think you've been pretty bad today, don't you?"

"Not particularly, but you're the boss."

"Yes, sweetheart, I am. And if you're good, I'll let you show me what you did in the tub today." He throws me a sly grin.

"Well, if _you're _good, perhaps I'll let you watch." I throw the grin right back at him as Rosa removes the salad plates and brings in the main course.

* * *

"Owww. Watch my ass." I growl at my husband as he squeezes one of the cheeks.

"Oh sweetheart, I try to watch your ass every chance I get." Christian grins back. "Here turn over."

I turn over on my tummy and he jumps out of bed and walks to the bathroom. He returns in a moment and sits on the bed cross legged next to me. Raising my gown to expose my butt and removing the cap from the tube he squirts out some Arnica cream and gently begins to massage it into my butt. "It's still pink."

"It still stings!" I shoot back at him.

"Your skin is so sensitive and reacts so easily."

"Tell me about it." I growl at him. "I'm the one with the sore ass this morning."

"Keep your knickers on. I'm trying to fix it," he continues to rub the cream into my skin.

"Mmmm. That feels good. Just don't rub too hard." I growl.

"I won't. How about if I kiss it and make it better?" he asks just before pressing his lips to my naked butt.

"That might help." Christian gently kisses both cheeks before putting the top on the cream and pulling my gown down to cover my bare cheeks.

"There. All better." He grins. "Now get your ass out of bed and get dressed. We have a plane to catch."

"Well, that didn't last long." Looking over Christian is already running the water in the shower. Before I can get out of bed and in the bathroom he's finished and out. "That was quick. I was gonna' join you."

"We don't have time for you to join me."

"What's the rush? It's our plane. It can't leave until we get there."

"We have a flight plan we have to adhere to and Virginia is sending her car for us at noon."

"Why is she sending a car?"

"We're going to spend a couple of hours in Chicago. She wanted us to come out to the house and have lunch, then we'll head back to the airport and fly on to Seattle."

"Oh. When did you decide all of this?"

"Yesterday. I talked to her and she asked if we'd have time to come by the house and eat. I told her yes. So."

"Okay. I'll get a move on." As I exit the shower, I see Christian has set a glass of orange juice and two Tylenol on the counter for me. I have to smile as I think about the firm spanking I got last night after showing him my bath episode. Then that lead to a very hard and stern fucking to set me straight as to whom my pleasure belongs.

"Do you want to take you're dress back or leave it here?" Rosa startles me.

"Oh, Rosa. You startled me." I have to think. "I'll take it back with me. I may want to wear it again."

"Okay. I'll pack it."

"Pack it?" I ask.

"Yes Mr. Grey asked me to get your things packed."

"Oh, okay. Thank you." He must really be in a hurry this morning.

"Ana?" I hear Christian yell as he walks to the bathroom.

"You're already dressed."

"Yep."

"You're really anxious to get to Chicago, aren't you?"

"I'm a little anxious."

"We forgot to call the kids last night." I remind him.

"I guess we got sidetracked." He chuckles as he watches me finish my makeup. "It's too early to call now, we'll do it when we get to Chicago. They should be up by then."

"Have you noticed Tommy likes to sleep late?" I ask him. "He and Grace both are sleepy heads."

"They take after their mother," he says as he moves behind me and gives me a kiss on my neck.

"I'm not his mother, Christian."

"It won't be long. You're more a mother to him than the girl was," he says. "I was thinking we might let him start calling us Mom and Dad. What do you think?"

"You know I want that. And that works for you. But if I ask him to call me mom, he's going to tell me he already has a mother. That will lead to trying to explain what happened to Lorna and we aren't ready to do that yet." I try to explain to him. "It's easier for you. He never had a father."

Christian snakes his arms around me. "Don't worry baby, it'll all work out. He'll forget in time and feel comfortable enough to call you, Mom."

"How long before you started calling Grace Mom?" I ask him as our eyes meet in the mirror.

"I don't remember. I didn't speak for the first two years. By the time I did, she was my mother in every sense of the word."

"Maybe you're right. I want him to be comfortable with it. And we haven't talked to Teddy yet. Remember I want the kids to know that we want Tommy to be part of our family, but it doesn't mean we love them any less."

"You're right. Maybe having Virginia there for a while will help them understand adoption a little better."

"Maybe so."

He pops my butt, "Hurry up. Stephen is already at the airport filing the flight plan."

"I'm on my way."

* * *

"Well that was fun." I tease.

Christian is squeezing my hand as I try to recover from our landing at Midway. "Damn that's a short runway," he growls." Now that we have a bigger plane, it's even shorter."

We taxi to the hanger and looking out the window I see the limo waiting for us. Coming to a stop Christian and I disembark and are met by Jeremy, the driver Virginia has sent for us. Christian tells Isla and Stephen that we will be back between two and three and to relax until then. I've never been to Chicago other than to change planes at O'Hare and so I enjoy the ride out to Virginia's house. Christian points out all the land marks as we travel through town. The city begins to turn into the suburbs and the small wood frame houses turn into large brick homes with expansive manicured lawns. "Does Virginia live out here?"

"Yep we aren't too far from it." Christian gives my hand a squeeze and I try to calm his nerves with a kiss. Soon we turn into a drive that is lined with trees and curves up to circle the front. As Jeremy stops and parks, Sawyer gets out and opens our door. Christian takes my hand as we walk up to the front door and as soon as he rings the bell, the door is answered by an older woman in a uniform. "Mr. Grey? So nice to see you again. Come in."

As we enter Virginia is waiting in the large foyer. She is just as I remember her. Her hair in a neat chignon. Pearl studs and a strand of pearls at her neck. She has on beige slacks and a black cotton sweater set with black paten kitten heels.

"Oh, Christian. Sweetheart. It's so good to see you again." She gives him a hug and he actually hugs back.

"Virginia," Christian pulls away and pulls me over. "you remember Ana."

"Of course." She gives me a huge hug and a kiss on my cheek. "Without this darling girl, I would never have found you." She gives us both smile and wipes a little tear from her eye. "Please come in and sit down."

Her home is beautiful. Very traditional décor. Elegant and graceful just as she is. "Bridgett, bring in some Iced coffee and an iced tea please." She directs the little woman who opened the door for us. "Unless you'd rather have coffee? I thought Christian mentioned you prefer tea to coffee."

"No tea is fine thank you." Christian and I take a seat on the sofa together and Virginia has a seat in a Queen Anne wingback chair across from us.

"Oh, you have no idea how much I've been looking forward to this." She glows looking at us. "I have no idea what to expect. I've never been around grandchildren before. Christian has told me all about them. Now there is Grace and Theodore, correct?"

"Yes. And Tommy."

"Tommy? Oh dear did I forget one?"

"No." Christian chimes in. "Tommy is a new addition to our family."

"We hope." I add.

"I don't understand." Virginia looks puzzled.

"Tommy is a child that is living with us and we hope to adopt him." I tell her.

"We are going to adopt him." Christian adds a positive note.

"I feel terrible. I got gifts for Theodore and Grace, but I didn't know about Tommy." She presses her hand against her chest as she talks.

"Don't worry about it. I bought out FAO Schwarz while we were in New York. They'll have plenty. In fact you can take one of the things I have for him and give it to him. "

"That's generous. Thank you."

"Virginia, really the kids have enough. They have more toys than they know what to do with." Christian tells her.

Bridgett brings our drinks in on a try and we all take a sip. Mine is wonderful. Mint tea with a fresh mint sprig. Christian and Virginia have iced coffee. "You're looking well, Virginia." Christian tells her.

"Thank you. I get by. I have my friends, bridge club once a week, lunch with friends at the club once a month. Various charities and planning committees. I keep busy."

"Lunch in ten minutes Mrs. Douglas."

"Thank you Bridgett."

"Now I want to hear all about this Tommy. How did you come to get him?"

Christian and I tell her the story of Sacramento, and Lorna and Tommy. I can see the compassion in her eyes as she listens. "Well. I can't wait to meet him and Theodore and Grace."

"Actually we call him Teddy." Christian tells her. "If you call him Theodore, he'll think he's in trouble."

Virginia smiles and we all have a little laugh. "Well, shall we go in to lunch?" Virginia stands up and we follow her into the dining room, where the sparkling dark cherry wood table is laid with fresh summer flowers and white tapers in crystal candle sticks. The placemats have beautiful spring flower china, surrounded by silver flatware and crystal goblets of water and iced tea. The room is bright and sunny with the drapes pulled back. Virginia sits at the head of the table and Christian and I flank her on each side. The dark wood chairs are upholstered in a lovely floral tapestry that matches the fabric of the captain's chairs. The walls are a pale yellow with white trim which adds to the bright, airy appearance of the room. The hardwood floors in the house are protected with Persian rugs.

"Really Virginia, this is so nice of you to have us to lunch." I thank her as Bridgett brings in the seafood salads and fresh bread and butter. The bread is still warm from the oven.

"Oh. I 'm so glad you're here. Christian asked if he could bring you to the house and I insisted you stay for lunch."

"I wanted to show Ana a bit of where I came from."

"Well, we can drive by the old house and your father's house on the way back to the airport if you like."

"That would be great. I want Ana to see as much as she can while we're here."

"Virginia, you have such a lovely home? How long have you lived here?" I ask as I enjoy my lunch.

"I bought this place after Phillip and I divorced. I got the old house in the settlement, but I couldn't stand to be in it another minute. I sold is as soon as the ink was dry on the papers and bought this place. I've enjoyed this house."

We hear a bark and turn to see a red cocker spaniel wander into the dining room.

"There she is. I was wondering where she was?" Christian says. "Come here Millie, " he coaxes her.

"This is Millie. She's been with me for almost fifteen years. Millie lie down. Don't bother anyone."

"Be careful. Your grandson has a habit of feeding dogs from the table." I have to smirk over at him.

"Do you have a dog?" she asks.

"Yes, we do. Christian fished him out of the lake and he sort of stayed. His name is Jack."

"Oh, what kind is he?"

"He's a mutt Virginia. A Jack Russell and Affenpinscher mix. That makes him a ….." Christian says and I can see it in his eyes.

"Christian." I warn. " She gets the picture."

"Well. I'm anxious to meet everyone. Bridgett and Jeremy will look after Millie while I'm gone."

"Virginia." I stop and give her a smile. "I can't tell you how happy I am that you are coming to spend time with us. I'm so anxious to get to know you."

Virginia reaches over and squeezes my hand. "Oh, my dear. You have no idea how happy I am to finally be meeting my family."


	93. Chapter 93

_**Fifty Shades…Full Circle**_

_**Chapter 93**_

Finishing lunch Christian pulls out his phone, "I hate to be rude, but we need to call the kids. Would you mind?" he asks Virginia.

"Heavens no."

Christian dials the house, "Gail. Mr. Grey." "No we're in Chicago. We got busy last night and forgot to give the kids a call. Are they around?" "Good. I'm going to put it on speaker." Christian sets his phone down on the table and puts it on speaker.

"Hey guys. It's Mom and Dad." I holler over to the phone.

"Mama when you be home?" I hear Grace first.

"In a little while baby."

"We'll be home for dinner Grace." Christian tells her.

"It bees two days." She reminds us.

"I know sweetheart, but it will be today. I promise."

"Teddy? Are you there son?"

"Yeah , Dad."

"What are you doing?"

"We're eatin' breakfast," he mumbles

"Don't talk with your mouth full." Christian smiles down at the phone.

"I'm not."

"Yesth he is daddy." I can hear Grace tell on him.

"I am not. Shut up."

"You shu up." I can see her pouting now.

Virginia has a huge smile on her face listening to them. I'm totally embarrassed.

"Hey, enough of that. Tommy? Are you there Buddy?" Christian barks

"He's nodding, Mr. Grey." Gail adds.

"Tommy, I can't hear you nod, buddy. You have to talk to us."

"Ukay" his little voice comes over the phone.

"Are you being good for Gail?"

"Uh huh. I bein' good."

"Well we'll be…."

"I eat a wufful." Tommy suddenly hollers out.

"That's good baby. Is it a good waffle?" I ask him.

"Uh huh. Jack eat a wufful too," he adds.

Christian has to chuckle just listening to them. "What a crew," he mumbles.

"Okay. Look we'll be home for dinner and we're bringing Grandma Virginia. You guys be good and mind Gail and we'll see you in a few hours. Okay?"

"Ukay, daddy. I be good." Grace says. "Gwama Ginia?"

"Yes, sweetheart?"

"Bwing me a pwesant."

Virginia giggles a bit, "I'll do my best."

"See ya Mom." Teddy adds.

"Bye." Tommy throws in there.

"Bye kids. We love you."

"See you guys in a couple of hours." Christian smiles and hangs up.

"Are you sure you're ready for all of that?" Christian asks Virginia.

"I can't wait. I've been looking forward to it all my life."

"I'm sorry about the present thing with Grace. She thinks everyone should bring her a present. It's just a phase…. I hope." I try to make an excuse for my daughter.

"Yes. I'm afraid our darling daughter is spoiled absolutely rotten." Christian smirks at his grandmother.

"And we all know who spoiled her." I add as we get up from the table.

"And I intend to keep spoiling her." He puts his arm around my shoulder as we walk out of the dining room. "Well I hate to rush us, but we have a drive back to Midway."

Before we leave Virginia gives me a tour of the house. The outside is red brick with huge white columns on the massive porch. Entering the home the foyer is covered in hardwood and to the right is the formal living room complete with baby grand. To the left is the library with floor to ceiling book shelves, fire place, mahogany walls and a powder room. There are amber leaded glass French doors that lead out to the formal garden and green house. Seems Virginia is an avid gardener. A winding staircase begins in the foyer and leads to the four upstairs bedrooms each with an en suite bath and fireplace. The kitchen is to the back with a breakfast and luncheon room off of it and the largest walk in pantry I've ever seen. To the other side is the formal dining room with a table that seats sixteen. The driveway curves to the back of the house and a detached three car garage. It passes under a breezeway that attaches to the servant's quarters where Bridgett and Jeremy live. They've been married for about thirty years and been with Virginia about the same amount of time. It's an older home that has been maintained beautifully.

Sawyer and Jeremy load Virginia's luggage and she gives Bridgett and Jeremy last minute instructions before we get in the car and head back to the airport.

"Your seatbelt." Christian nods over to her.

"What?" Virginia asks.

"Buckle your seatbelt."

"Oh. I don't usually buckle it when I'm in the back."

"You could be hurt if we had an accident," he reminds her.

"Virginia, remind me and we'll talk." I tell her across Christian. He's sitting between us. "Christian has safety issues with the people in his life. I'll explain it all to you."

"We probably should sit down together and talk about some things." Christian tells her as we speed our way to the airport.

"Like what?" Virginia looks horrified.

"Well, now that you will be staying with us and meeting our family and friends, people will know you are my grandmother."

"Is that a problem?" she asks.

"Well not for us, but you see, I'm fairly wealthy." Christian starts.

"Christian, dear, I'm fully aware of your financial standing." Virginia smiles over at him and pats his knee.

"Well, anyone that is close is a target for any number of things, kidnapping being the major risk. I keep a fairly large security team and all members of my family are assigned a security detail that is in constant touch with my security headquarters in Seattle. Virginia I'm afraid that now that our relationship will become public knowledge I'll have to assign a security person to you. In fact, I've had someone on you since my last visit."

"You have? I have a security detail?" she looks so surprised.

"Yes. I can't take the chance that someone would harm you or kidnap you." He tries to explain.

"Well that just never entered my mind."

"Virginia, I'm afraid you're entering a whole new world. You're grandson comes with a lot of little extras." I try to give her a smile. "I know it's a lot and we can have a talk about it. I want you to understand all of it."

"Well, I never imagined."

"I'm sorry it has to be this way, but I just can't take any chances." Christian tries to explain.

"No. No dear that's fine. I think I understand. I just can't see why anyone would kidnap an eighty year old woman."

"Because you mean something to me. I care about you." Christian takes her hand and gives it a squeeze. "Unfortunately that makes you vulnerable. I'm sorry."

"Don't be. Whatever I have to put up with is worth having you in my life."

After a short ride we arrive back at Midway and pull up to the hanger and the GEH jet. "Goodness. Is that yours?" Virginia asks.

"Yes. Actually we just got her a few days ago." I can her the pride in Christian's voice. He loves this damn plane. As Sawyer loads the luggage we board the plane and Christian introduces Virginia to Isla and the flight crew.

"Oh my word. I don't think I've ever seen anything quite like this." Virginia marvels as Christian shows her around the interior. I make sure she knows where the ladies room and the kitchen are located. First things first.

"Mr. Grey. We need to taxi." Isla informs us.

"Sure. Sweetheart. Virginia. Let's head up and take our seats." Christian motions to the front of the plane. After getting buckled in Isla offers us beverages. Christian, Virginia and I all have a Hendricks and tonic. Christian and I are in our usual seats and Virginia is seated across from us facing toward us.

"Christian this is just amazing. I can't get over it. I knew you had a private plane, but this is just more than I could have imagined."

"It's my new toy. We had a plane before this, but we lost it and this is the replacement.

"How does one lose a plane?"

"It was part of the hostage agreement when Christian was in Columbia." I tell her.

"Yes. My wife gave away our plane along with a large sum of our money."

"It was you or the silly possessions. I chose you. I haven't noticed you complaining."

"You did a wonderful job handling the situation. And in your condition. I was very proud of you sweetheart." Christian gives my hand a squeeze.

"Thank you but…" I start.

"Please don't start with I told you not to go. You know why I had to do it," he admonishes me.

"I know. I just wasn't very happy about it. I almost lost you." I can feel a tear well in my eyes.

Christian reaches over and wipes it with his thumb. "All over now. Don't think about it."

"I know. There was just so much going on in our lives back then."

"Sweet heart, there's always something going on in our life."

I have to give him a weak smile. "Life with you, Mr. Grey, can be a three ring circus sometimes."

"I know. I don't know what to do about that."

* * *

The sun is hitting the horizon as we finally touch down in Seattle. We taxi to the hanger and when coming to a stop Christian unbuckles his seatbelt and stands up to stretch. "God flying can be so boring."

"You were on your laptop most of the time. How could you be bored?" I ask as I get out of my seat.

"Here let me help you." Christian extends his hand and helps Virginia out of her seat. She's obviously a bit stiff after the long trip. "Let's get this show on the road. I haven't seen my kids in three days now."

After helping Virginia disembark we slide into the SUV that is waiting for us at the GEH hanger and make the half hour ride back to the house.

The huge gates open and we pass through and down the drive. "Oh, my. This is just lovely." Virginia almost gasps when she sees the size of it.

"Don't let the size fool you. We rarely use all of it. And we do provide housing for many of our employees that work on the grounds." I try to explain away the need for all of that house.

As we exit the car and walk in the front door, Jack is the first sound we hear. He is right there barking and jumping and Christian picks him up and tries to introduce him to Virginia, but Jack only has eyes for Christian. I guess he's like me in that respect.

"Mom! Dad!" we hear Teddy's voice and his footsteps as he races to see us.

He jumps up in Christian's arms wrapping his legs around his dad and gives him a huge hug. "Hey sport. Long time no see." He teases. He sets Teddy on the floor and ruffles his hair, "I do believe you've grown an inch while we were gone."

I lean down and hug and kiss him and pull him to me. About that time Grace comes running in her curls bouncing all over her head followed by Tommy. "Mama." I bend down and pick her up and smother kisses on her cheeks. "You be home," she squeals.

"Hey princess," Christian leans over and kisses her. "I think you've gotten move beautiful in just three days."

"Uh huh. I habe, daddy." She bats her eyelashes at him.

"Hey Buddy. Come see me." Christian leans down and picks up Tommy. He gives him kisses on his cheek and neck and a big hug. "Did you miss us buddy?"

"Uh huh. You comed home."

"Yes we did. I promised we'd come home and I always keep my promises."

"What did I do?" Tommy asks.

"What son? What do you mean what did you do?"

"Theddy gotted bigger and Gwace gotted bewful. What did I do?" he asks as he hangs on to Christian.

"You stayed here so we could see you, baby." I tell him as I lean over and kiss him. "I'm so glad you're here so I can give you a kiss."

"That's right buddy. There's nothing better than having everyone here."

Grace walks over to Virginia and tugs on her sweater. "Are you Gamma Ginia?" she asks craning he neck to look up at her great grandmother.

"Hello, sweetheart." Virginia bends down to look at Grace. "Yes. I am your great grandmother Virginia." Virginia is hesitant, but she runs her hand over Graces head and through her curls. "It's very nice to meet you."

"I know." Grace responds and Virginia chuckles at her.

"Everyone, I want you to meet my grandmother and your great grandmother Virginia.

"Hello." Teddy steps forward and extends his hand.

"Well hello Theodore. Aren't you handsome?"

"Well, my name is Teddy, but you can call me Theodore if you want to." She shakes his hand and then gives him a hug.

Still holding Tommy, "And this is our Tommy." Christian introduces Virginia. "Tommy can you say hello to Gramma Virginia?"

"Hewo." He utters before burying his face in Christian's shoulder.

"Well, Virginia, this is Gail. She takes care of the kids and cooks for us. She is married to Taylor, who is head of our security department. Gail, Taylor this is Mrs. Douglas. We have another housekeeper and her name is Myra. She's not here on weekends and actually won't be with us much longer. I guess Friday is her last day isn't it?" Christian asks me.

"Yes. Myra is getting married and leaving us."

"Mywa marrwy Gampa Way." Grace tells her.

"What dear?" she asks.

I explain. "Yes. Myra is engaged to my father. It's a long story. We have all week to bring you up to speed with everything."

"Come in and sit down." Christian heads to the family room still carrying Tommy.

"Oh, Jason, could you put the bags in the guest suite please?" I ask Taylor.

"Yes ma'am."

"I thought you said his name was Taylor?" she whispers to me.

"It is. Jason is his first name. I call him Jason and Christian calls him Taylor. Another long story."

Once in the family room, Christian and I sit on the sofa and Virginia takes a seat in a large comfy chair. "Come here sweetheart." I reach over and pull Tommy in to my lap. "I missed you so much." I give him a big hug and kiss his cheeks.

Grace crawls up in her daddy's lap and lets him shower her with the appropriate amount of affection. Teddy jumps up and sits between us and I wrap my arm around him and kiss his head. "Come here baby. I missed you."

"I missed you too Mom." He snuggles against me.

"Dinner will be ready in about thirty minutes. May I get anyone anything while you wait?" Gail asks.

"I'm fine thank you." Christian tells her.

"Me too Gail." I add.

"Nothing for me." Virginia tells her. I can see she's a bit emotional.

Teddy gets up and walks over to Virginia. "Don't cry Gramma Virginia. We'll try to be real nice. I promise."

Virginia smiles at him and wipes her face then puts her arm around him. "I'm not upset, darling. I'm just very happy."

"Mom cries when she's happy too sometimes. Huh Mom?"

"Yes I do Teddy."

"I'm just so happy to finally meet all of you. I've waited a very long time for this."

"We're happy to meet you too, but it hasn't been a long time."

"Well that doesn't matter. Just as long as you're glad too." She smiles at him. "Did you know that you look just like your father?"

"Yeah. Everybody says that." He ducks his head and smiles.

"Gamma Ginia?" Grace yells.

"Yes dear?"

"Whea is Gampa Ginia?" she asks.

"Sweetie, there isn't any Grandpa Virginia. Just Grandma Virginia." I try to hush her up.

"But why?" she asks.

"Just because. There isn't. Now hush." I whisper to her.

"That's okay. Sweetie, my husband and I aren't married anymore and he lives in Chicago. I don't think you'll be meeting him."

"Grace we can explain everything later, okay?" Christian tells her.

"Ukay Daddy."

"Virginia. I know you must be tired. Would you like to freshen up before dinner?" I ask her.

"I think I'm fine. I don't want to take my eyes off of these precious children just yet," she says.

In a few minutes Gail calls us to dinner. "I hope you don't mind, we usually eat at our family dining table instead of the formal dining room. The kids aren't the neatest of eaters." I explain as we walk to our casual table between the kitchen and family room.

"Oh, dear. That's fine. We never ate at the formal table with Ella. She had food from one end of the room to the other. How one small girl could make such a mess I'll never know."

"I'd like to hear about her sometime. Christian told me a little, but I'd really like to know more about her."

"Of course. I'm sure we'll have plenty of time to talk this week."

Christian and I get the Tommy and Grace up in their booster chairs on one side of the oval table and Teddy sits next to Virginia on the other. Christian and I sit in our usual seats at the ends.

"My everything looks delicious." Virginia says looking at the food on the table.

"We eat family style here Virginia. Serving just doesn't work with the kids." Christian tells her. "Just help your plate and duck." Christian helps Grace's plate and his own and helps Teddy with his and I help Tommy. Apricot roasted pork, rosemary potatoes, lima beans, fresh homemade rolls with butter, iced tea for the grown-ups and milk for the children. As usual Tommy flies in on his plate and begins to devour everything and Grace picks up her beans with her fingers and eats them one by one.

"Grace. Fork." Christian reminds her.

"Dey fawl off daddy. I can do it." She frowns over at her father.

"Well try. We don't put food in our mouth with our fingers."

"Ukay." She proceeds to pick up the beans with her fingers and load the fork.

"Grace." He quietly barks.

"I not put it in my mowf wif my fingers. See?"

Christian rolls his eyes, "I'm sorry. They really do know better."

"Christian, I've been around small children. Don't worry about it." Virginia smiles over at him.

"Dad can you help me cut?" Teddy asks his father to help with his pork.

"May I help?" Virginia asks him.

Teddy shrugs. "Sure. The knife doesn't work."

"Well first of all you have to use the sharp side. It cuts better." She cuts is meat into bite sizes before handing him back his knife and fork.

"Thank you." He tells her as he stuffs the meat into his mouth.

"Gamma Ginia?" Grace hollers. Will she ever learn to speak in a normal voice?

"Yes, dear."

"Do you habe any wittle gurls at home?"

"No. sweetheart I don't. I used to, but not anymore."

"Why?"

"Well, she grew up and moved away."

"Her dozen comed to bisit?"

"Grace." Christian puts his hand on her arm." Stop asking so many questions and eat your dinner. It's not polite."

"But I jus ast her if she had a wittle gurl."

"I know. We'll talk about it later. Now eat and stop with the questions."

'Ukay. You got a doggie, Gamma Ginia?" Grace bellows out.

Christian sighs and rolls his eyes.

"Yes dear. I have a cocker spaniel and her name is Millie."

"Where she at?"

"She is at my house and someone is taking care of her for me."

"What a c..cock spanal?"

"Well she has long curly red hair and floppy ears and big sad eyes."

"We got Jack." She shoves a forkful of potatoes in her mouth. "He was dwownin and daddy sabed him."

"Grace don't talk with your mouth full, baby." I remind her.

"I found him first. I saw him in the water and called Dad. He swam out and got him and we took him to the doctor and we got to keep 'em." Teddy enthusiastically tells his great grandmother.

"I see. Well, I'm glad you found him."

"Me too. He would have drownded."

"My, Tommy is certainly a good eater." Virginia notices.

"He eats everything." Teddy tells her. "When he came he was hungry. He didn't have anything to eat where he came from."

"Oh, I'm sorry. I know he must be glad to be with you."

"He's waitin' for his mom to get better. She's in the hospital." He cups his hand over his mouth and leans in to Virginia. "She takes drugs."

"Oh, I see."

"I'm glad you all don't know my social security number. Evidently there is no information you won't divulge." Christian shakes his head.

"Well it's true. She does."

"Enough Teddy. Eat your dinner." It's about that time that Teddy reaches for his milk and topples his glass sending milk everywhere. As much as he loves the kids, I think Christian is about at his limit as he throws his napkin over the liquid creeping across the table and barks, "Gail!"

Gail rushes in with towels to wipe up the mess and then brings Teddy a fresh glass of milk.

"I'm sorry, Dad." Teddy looks crushed.

"It's okay son. Just watch what you're doing."

"Well Virginia I'm impressed you haven't left the table screaming yet." I tease her.

"Oh, I'm enjoying every minute. They're so precious."

"We'll see what you say at the end of the week." Christian jokes.

"I pinished." Tommy quietly tells me.

"Do you want some more, baby?" I ask looking at his clean plate.

"Tatoes."

"Okay." I place more potatoes on his plate and Grace does her usual and gives him what's left of her buttered roll.


	94. Chapter 94

_**Fifty Shades…Full Circle**_

_**Chapter 94**_

"God, this bed feels good." I sigh as I relax into the familiar.

"Well she hasn't run screaming for the hills yet," Christian says as he pulls me close.

"I know." I giggle against him. "She's a pretty tough eighty year old."

"I'd have been gone long ago." Christian sighs.

"You can't leave. You brought 'em into the world; you gotta' stay and raise 'em." I tell him as I snuggle against his chest.

"I didn't bring 'em into the world, you did. I just kept you fed, happy and well fucked, while they cooked."

"Well fucked? I swear. You make me sound like some sort of dominatrix cracking the whip."

"You were. When you were pregnant, I did whatever you asked. That included taking care of those hormonal things."

"Mmmm. I was pretty horny, I guess."

"You guess? I thought my dick was going to fall off. It stayed raw half the time. It was painful."

"I never noticed you shying away."

"Well…I mean. You're my wife. I'll sacrifice anything for you."

"Including your poor tired dick?"

"Yes. Including my amazingly talented dick. Not to mention large and hard and.."

"I get the picture, Moby."

"Care to go on a little whaling expedition, Ahab?" he nuzzles my ear.

"Would you be terribly disappointed if we snuggle?" I ask. "With the trip, the kids, getting Virginia settled….I'm exhausted."

"Truth be known, I am too. I was just asking for you." He kisses my forehead. "I'm always good for snuggling."

"Well I appreciate the thought. I can probably pencil you in for first thing in the morning."

"It's a date, captain."

* * *

"Oh, God I love Sunday's." I growl as I stretch and pull the covers over my naked body.

"Me too." Christian grumbles, catching his breath, as he rolls off and back over on to his spot.

"It feels so good to be back in our bed." I roll over and throw my leg over his thighs and rest my head on his chest.

"Don't rub that thing on my thigh," he snaps at me and tries to catch his breath.

"What like that?" I wiggle my hips and rub my wet crotch against him.

"Yes like that. It's wet," he grumbles.

"I thought you liked it wet."

"I do, but when it's your stuff, not mine."

"Oh I forgot. You gave it to me and you don't want it back."

"That's right. It's …. ookie."

"Ookie?" I smile up at him. " You sound like one of the kids. That's the best you can come up with? It's ookie?"

"Fucking right."

"I'll show you ookie." I prop up on my hands and make sure I have full contact with his thigh and roll my hips spreading wet up and down his thigh to his knee."

"Fuck! Don't do that!" he grabs me by my waist and throws me back on my side of the bed. I can't help but laugh until tears spill out of my eyes. "It's not funny, Anastasia."

"Yes it is. Oh, that's right. It's not funny…it's ookie."

He rolls over and grabs my hands pulling them over my head while I continue to laugh. "I think I'll fuck that giggle right out of you." He leans in for a kiss.

"But then you'd just make more ookie." I burst into laughter again.

"That's right. I'll ookie all over your ass." He says nuzzling my neck while I laugh hysterically.

"I thought you just did." With one roll he pops back inside….all the way and I gasp.

"Not so funny now is it?" he grumbles as he begins to thrust hard on his way back to ookieville.

* * *

"Okay. We have kids and a great grandmother to take care of." I pull the cover off of him and swat his beautiful bubble ass. "Get up Grey."

"I can't." he grumbles into his pillow. "I'm dead."

"You're not dead." I fuss at him. " I'm getting a shower. Come on we need to get dressed before the kids get up. And I have no idea if Virginia is an early riser or not."

"Get the water warm. I'm on my way."

Shower finished, hair dried, teeth brushed and I'm dressed. "Christian? Sweetie? Are you still asleep?" I ask sitting down next to him on the bed and combing my fingers through his hair.

"Huh?" he raises his head from the pillow. "What?"

"Are you okay? It's not like you to still be in bed?"

"I feel like shit."

"Baby, what's wrong?"

"I think I have a fucking cold."

"Oh, no. I'm sorry. Is your throat scratchy?" I ask him still stroking his head.

"Yes. I ach all over and my head hurts."

I put my hand on his forehead.

"You don't feel particularly warm. I'll get you some Tylenol and some juice." I lean over to kiss his cheek."

"No." He pushes me away. "You'll catch it."

"Sweetheart, we exchanged a copious amount of body fluids last night and earlier this morning. If I'm going to catch it, I've already got it."

"You can't get sick. Who's going to take care of the kids and Virginia," he growls.

"Looks like I drew the short straw on that one." I lean in and kiss his forehead. "You stay warm, and I'll be back with some juice and Tylenol and some hot tea." I tuck the sheet in around him and he snuggles back down into his pillow.

Landing at the foot of the stairs, I'm greeted by Jack who is bouncing off the walls. I assume he want's breakfast and to go outside. Walking to the door to let him out I notice the kids already up and in the family room. All three are still in their PJs but the TV is on cartoons and they are quietly watching and playing. The smell of coffee is wafting through the air. After letting Jack outside I wander in to see the kids.

"What's everybody doing up already?" I ask.

"We waked up aweady." Grace smiles over at me; her blue eyes shining through the bed hair that is all over her head.

"Are you guys hungry yet?' I ask them.

"Nope." Teddy answers not moving his eyes from the TV screen. "Gramma Virginia made breakfast already."

"What? Grandma Virginia made breakfast?"

"Uh huh."

"Where is she?" I ask not seeing her.

"She went back upstairs. She's fixin' her hair or somethin'." He tells me.

"Yeah, Momma. It bees wreal long. It comed to hear," She points to her back. "Her had to go make it short."

"I see." I guess Gracie means put it back in her usual chignon.

"Well what did you have for breakfast?"

"I had ceweal an miwlk an banama." Tommy says smiling up from the floor.

"That sounds good did you all have cereal?"

"Yep, but I didn't have a banana; just cereal." Teddy says.

Grace walks over in her little pink night gown trying to brush that wild hair out of her eyes and crawls up in my lap. "Momma, wears Daddy?"

"He doesn't feel very good. He has a cold and is going to stay in bed." I try to brush her hair with my fingers. "We need to get a brush to your hair sweetie."

"I know. Does Daddy habe a snoddy nosth?"

"Well not right now, but probably later. Right now he just feels bad." I give her a kiss. "Snotty isn't a very nice word. Where did you hear that?"

"Teddy telled it to me. Isth is a bad wood?"

"No it isn't a bad word, It's just not a very nice word. Maybe you could say a runny nose instead."

"Wunny?"

"Yep. That sounds better."

"Ukay. Daddy hasth a wunny nosth. I go thee him an make him fewl better."

"Sweetie, let's let him rest for now. I think he wants to sleep a little, okay?"

"Ukay, but I go see him later."

"Maybe." I give her a big good morning kiss. "Did you have breakfast too?"

"Uh huh. I habe Fwench toes and banamas."

"Was it good?"

She gives me a big grin and a vigorous nod. "It was good."

"Oh, I see you're up." Virginia says as she walks back into the family room. "I hope you don't mind. I was up and the kids were hungry so I made them some breakfast."

"Heavens no. I hope they haven't been a bother."

"No. I loved doing it. The boys just wanted cereal, but little Grace here wanted French toast. I just rummaged around until I found the makings." She smiles as she walks to the kitchen. "That Gail certainly keeps a well-stocked pantry."

"Yes. Christian tends to throw her curve balls with what he wants to eat sometimes so she tries to be prepared."

"I have coffee going and I was going to make myself some French toast, can I make you and Christian some?"

"Why don't you sit down and I'll make it for you. You're a guest."

"Oh, heavens, I'd love to do it."

"Well…okay. I'll come and get some tea." I tell her as I follow her into the kitchen. "I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but I'm afraid Christian has come down with a bad cold. He's feeling pretty rotten and he's still up in bed."

"Oh, dear. I hate to hear that. Can I get him anything?"

"I doubt he'll feel much like breakfast, but I thought some juice and hot tea might be good for him."

"Well you sit down and I'll have this ready in a few minutes."

"Are you sure?" I ask her.

"Absolutely. Go."

Walking back into the family room I fall on the sofa with my tea. "Grace. Baby go find your brush and let's work on that hair."

"Nooooo Mama."

"Yeeeesss, Grace. Go get your brush." She stomps back in and thrusts her brush out at me with a pout on her mouth.

Spreading my thighs I have her sit between my legs and start the process of untangling curls to the sounds of her whining and complaining.

"Sweetie, I'm sorry it hurts. I'm trying to be careful."

"Ana. Breakfast is ready." Virginia calls .

"A reprieve Grace." I hand her the brush. "Here you work on it while I go eat."

"Oh Virginia, this looks amazing." I tell her as I sit down with my tea. After sticking a fork in it and taking a bit I'm convinced it is amazing. "Oh my gosh this is good. What did you do?"

"Oh, I just used the thick bread and then slice it open and stuff it with a cream cheese, powdered sugar mixture with pecans then sliced bananas over the top and sprinkled with powdered sugar."

"It's heaven. Too bad Christian isn't here to have any." I mumble with my mouth full.

Virginia joins me eating breakfast. "Did you sleep well last night?" I ask.

"Yes. The bed is wonderful and the room is beautiful."

"Well I want you to let me know if you need anything. And I'll clean the kitchen. I certainly didn't mean for you to be cooking breakfast, especially your first day here."

"I wanted to. It was nice just being with the children and watching them eat and play." Taking a sip of coffee. "How long has Tommy been here?"

"Oh, I'd say a month. Maybe a little more."

"And you're planning to adopt him?"

"Yes, we hope to if everything goes as planned."

"So his mother just disappeared?"

"Yes. We had her in rehab and she walked out a week or so ago. Just left."

"Well, he's adorable. Just the sweetest little thing."

"Yes he is. I think Teddy and Grace are fond of him. Christian and I are already head over heels about him."

"I imagine Christian was much like this when he was found."

"I suppose. Grace can tell you more when you meet her. She was the doctor in the ER when they brought him in. Evidently he wasn't in good shape."

"Oh? Really?"

"Yes. From what she told me he was badly underweight and had been badly….well…abused."

I can see her squeeze her eyes closed and a pained expression spreads across her face. "I was hoping that hadn't happened."

"Virginia, Christian hasn't had an easy life. In fact when I met him he was emotionally closed off and almost unreachable. You see, not only was he physically abused when he was a young child, he suffered more abuse as a teenager. Without going into detail, it about sent him so far over the edge, I wasn't sure I'd ever be able to reach him and pull him back."

"What in the world happened?"

"That's something I'd rather Christian talk about and only if he brings it up. Grace and Carrick were unaware, so it wasn't their fault. He was just lured into a relationship by a predatory adult. He didn't understand it then and didn't see it for what it really was until recently. But I…"I hear the intercom and Christian's voice.

"Ana?"

"Yes, sweetie?"

"I thought you were coming back." I hear him cough a time or two.

"I am. I'm sorry I stopped to see the kids and talk to Virginia. Do you want anything to eat?"

"No." Cough , cough. I hear him groan. "Just you, please."

"Okay. I'm on my way."

"He sounds awful." Virginia says.

"I know. I'm sorry. He can be …well… a little demanding when he's not feeling well. I need to get his juice and tea ready. But I mean it, I'm cleaning the kitchen." After getting a tray ready with his liquids and two pieces of dry toast, just in case, I head upstairs with it. Carefully opening the door, I can hear Grace talking to her dad.

"You done fewl good daddy?" Poor Christian is lying on his tummy and Grace is on the bed next to him patting his back.

"Nope. Daddy doesn't feel very good."

"You nosth be snoddy cause you habe a cowld?"

"No. I don't have a runny nose Grace. You need to run back down stairs, sweetie, daddy doesn't want you to catch his cold."

"Dats ukay daddy. I stay wif you."

"ANA!" he yells not realizing I'm already in the room.

"I'm right here." I try to appease him as I set the tray on the table, then head to the bathroom for the Tylenol, antihistamines, vitamin C, zinc and decongestants. After placing the tablets on the plate with the toast, I try to prop his pillows so he can sit up and drink his juice.

"Daddy fewls bad momma."

"I know baby. Remember I told you he didn't feel like having company right now?"

"I not comp'ny. I Gwace. I make him fewl better." As Christian sits up, Grace tries to snuggle in next to him and I have to reach across him and pick her up setting her on the floor. Then I put the bed tray over his lap.

"Here you go hot shot. Orange juice, hot tea and toast if you feel like it and pills to make you feel better."

"Mmm." He takes the juice and grabs the pills downing them. "I don't feel like eating right now," he grumbles.

"Well try if you can. It'll help that medicine settle on your tummy."

"God damn I feel like fucking shit." He growls as he leans back and rubs his hands across his face.

Gracie gasps, "Daddy thay a ho bunch a bad woods, Mamma."

"Yes, sweetie. That's why you don't need to be up here. I imagine he'll say a whole lot more." I turn her around to face the door, "Now go to your room and I'll be in in a minute to get you dressed."

"Ukay. I be back later daddy."

"Okay Sweetie." Christian grumbles back at her then shivers a bit.

"You want a T-shirt or pajama top?" I ask.

"Yeah. T-shirt would be good."

After helping him get his shirt on, I sit on the bed next to him," I need to go get the kids dressed and the kitchen cleaned up. How's the tea?"

"Good. You put mint in it."

"Yep. That'll help you with your 'snoddy' nose."

"What a kid." Christian shakes his head. Before I can get up Tommy wanders in.

"Hey Mr. T what's up?" I ask as he wanders over to where I am sitting.

"Come in Buddy." Christian says to him between sips of hot tea.

"Kwisten fewl bad?" he asks.

I pull him up in my lap so he can see Kwisten. "Yes, Sweetheart, I'm afraid Christian isn't feeling good."

"Did you gibed him some medithine?"

"Yes I just gave him some, but it hasn't had time to work yet."

"Kwisten habe to go to da hopsital?"

"No I don't think he's that sick. Which reminds me you don't need to catch a cold, mister. You already have asthma and you aren't supposed to be around anyone with a cold."

I stand up still holding Tommy, "Come on. Let's go get your clothes on and you can go outside and play."

"Okay. Bye Kwisten. Feewl better." Tommy waves bye to him.

"Bye Bud. I'll see you later." Christian tells him with a cough.

"I'll be back to check on you later. Holler if you need anything." I tell him. As I walk out the door carrying Tommy Teddy is walking in. "Go say hi to dad, but don't stay too long, he needs to go back to sleep."

"Okay."

After getting Tommy changed into a t-shirt, shorts and athletic shoes and making up his bed I head over to Grace's room. After interrupting her play with her dolls, I get her into a sundress and sandals and finally tame her hair. After making her bed I walk to Teddy's room to make sure he has gotten himself dressed. To my surprise, he up on his bed reading a book.

"What 'cha reading big boy?" I ask as I enter the room.

"A book about boats."

"A book about boats?" I crawl up on his bed and lie down next to him. "What does it say?"

"It's mostly pictures and then it talks about the different kind of boats. See?" He shows me the page. "That one is like the Grace. Well kinda'. There isn't another one just like her because dad and Mac built her."

"That's right they did." I lean up and give him a kiss. "How are things going?"

"Good. I guess," he shrugs.

"You guess?"

"Yeah. I'm good."

"Are you enjoying your summer vacation?" I ask him running my fingers through his hair.

"Uh huh."

"Teddy? What do you think about Tommy?"

"He's okay. I feel sorta sorry for him. I mean his mom taking drugs and all."

"Sweetie, I want this to be our secret and don't say a word to Tommy, he doesn't know yet, but his mom left the hospital. We don't know where she is and we don't think she's coming back."

"She ran away?" he looks horrified. "What's going to happen to Tommy?"

"Well, what do you think we should do?"

"He could stay here. I mean where else would he go?"

"I was sort of hoping you'd say that. You see, dad and I would like to adopt Tommy."

"A..dopt? You mean he would live here forever?"

"Uh huh. How would you feel about that, sweetie?"

"I dunno. I guess it would be okay."

"You know your dad and I wanted to have a brother for you and Grace and that hasn't really changed."

"But he wouldn't be Sam." Teddy almost looks worried.

"No baby. No one could take Sam's place, ever. But Tommy could be part of our family."

"I guess it would be okay."

I sit up and pull him over into my lap. I stroke his hair and kiss head and take in his little boy smell.

"Mom? Are you smelling my hair?" he asks.

"Yes I am."

"Why?"

"Because I like the way you smell. You smell like my baby boy." I hug him tighter to me. "You'll always be my baby boy. You were my first little baby, Teddy."

"Was I daddy's first too?"

I have to laugh, "Why would you ask that? Of course you are his first baby boy." God I hope so.

"I dunno'. Just askin'. So dad wasn't married to anyone before you?"

I give him a strange look. "No, Teddy. Neither daddy nor I were married to anyone else."

"Okay. They do it a lot on TV. I was just wunderin'."

"I think you're watching too much TV. I'll leave you to your book. You can get dressed and come down when you want to."

"Okay." I get up to leave. "Mom?"

"Yes baby?"

"Member when you told me that Sam was in everything? Like the flowers and clouds and stars?"

"Yes, Teddy I remember that."

"Do you think part of Sam is in Tommy?"

"Teddy, that's a lovely thought, but I think Tommy is his own person, just like you are all Teddy, Grace is all Grace. I think Tommy is all Tommy. And I think Sam is somewhere waiting to see us again one day."

"I hope so." I can see him wipe the back of his little hand over his eyes.

"Me too baby. I'll see you later okay?"

"Okay, Mom."

It's all I can do to keep from crying. Where did I get that little boy? I decide to check on Christian once more before going down. Peering in the bedroom door the room is darkened. I can barely see Christian's head sticking out from the covers. As I walk over to check on him, I see Jack snuggled up next to him sound asleep. Christian is snoring with his 'snoddy' nose and I lean down and kiss his forehead without waking him.


End file.
